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fairlyang · 3 months

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Let you break my heart again 🕷️

you are in love with your best friend

w/c: 999

pairing: miguel o’hara x reader

tags: kinda angst? you’re so in love, he doesn’t feel the same, heartbreak, shitting n crying, slightly delusional

notes: the grip this song has had on me the past two weeks- this idea came to me last week I just HAD TO-

part two

You had been feeling down the entire day since you saw Miguel post the new girl he had been talking to and calling her his girlfriend with today’s date on the caption.

Him calling you a couple hours after asking if you wanted to go to a party with him only added salt to the wound.

You have been hopelessly and desperately in love with him since your freshmen year of high school.

8 years.

8 years of silence.

8 years of torture.

No one even looked his way in high school because he, alongside you, were known as the science nerds of the school. You obviously didn’t care, if anything it made falling for him that much predictable.

At least for anyone with eyes and good at deciphering body language.

Which Miguel wasn’t.

Somehow he never realized and you never had the balls to confess your love to him.

After graduating high school he had quite possibly the biggest glow up (unbeknownst to you he had turned into spider-man) and first semester of uni changed everything for him.

He had girls eating out of the palm of his hand and practically falling to their knees for him as if they hadn’t been using him to do their homework just a few months back.

Miguel didn’t seem to care or see through all the girl’s intentions.

Meanwhile you had liked him when he would wear nerdy little crewnecks and those thick glasses that had now been long abandoned.

You liked him when he was getting brutally bullied and were the only one to ever stick up for him, but it never going well for either of you.

You liked him when he was going through a hard time with his mom and relied on you heavily for nearly everything.

You liked him when the revelation of who his father was, tore him up to literal pieces.

He was always in your head. Whether it be daydream, hearing someone talk about him, or actually dreaming about him at night.

Only in your mind can you pretend that you’re his girlfriend. That he likes you.

That you’re his first and only choice.

That you’re the only one he wants.

That he’s just as in love with you as you are with him.

He had taken over all your thoughts possible and it never got any easier.

You thought you’d get over it after sophomore year but it only grew as he ended up being your only friend throughout high school.

Nothing was more heartbreaking than having to hear him talk about all the girls he would go out with, or fuck.

The worst was when you’d actually go to parties with him. You’d end up almost throwing up or crying in the bathroom after seeing yet another new girl grinding herself against him or a girl making out with him.

It never ended up being less heartbreaking. You had luckily made a few friends who tried their best to help.

Peter B and MJ.

Somehow you befriended them your first year of uni and all four of you became a little group. They were your occasional saviors when you’d find yourself sulking over Miguel being with another girl.

They’d always try to distract you and cheer you up.

Or if they were the ones to spot Miguel fooling around they’d turn you to the opposite direction to avoid your heart from crumbling again.

You felt as if you were being entrapped.

It was almost as if Miguel subconsciously knew what he was doing.

Because when he grew bored of a girl all of a sudden his attention would be fully on you.

Buying you food, getting you cute little plants, helping you study.

It was an endless cycle of pain and heartbreak then yearning and being enamored by him.

Right now was pure heartbreak and misery.

You had been crying for hours on end now and just let your sad playlist loop.

All you were wishing for now is that one day you’d stop falling in love with him.

That somehow your feelings for him would wash away and you’ll never have to deal with this heartbreak ever again.

But it’s been long now. These feelings weren’t going to disappear.

And he wasn’t going to magically fall in love with you.

Especially because he’s always been the one to let anyone and everyone know that you were only his best friend. And nothing more.

But the way he’d wrap his arms around you, leave kisses on your forehead and cheeks just boggled your head.

The way he would just stare at you when you were rambling about the newest science news you’d heard about.

The way he would hug you tightly at the most random times imaginable.

The way he’d willingly put his jacket on you if it were too chilly outside.

The way he would get so overprotective when a guy asks you out.

So you were always questioning what he really thought of you.

He never made it easy to decipher any of his feelings unless he was telling you up front, which he almost never did.

As more hot tears fell down your face, you could only pray that someone will like you like you like him.

It felt like such an impossible ask.

You loved him so much and you could practically feel pieces of your heart breaking. Why couldn’t he just reciprocate your love?

Why did you have to torture yourself like this?

Why is the only time you’re truly happy (besides when you’re with him) is when you’re dreaming about actually being with him?

Why is it so hard for him to romantically love you?

Why does it always have to be platonic?

Maybe one day you’ll be able to get over him and these feelings won’t be as strong.

Maybe one day you’ll find someone that’ll know how to take care of your heart and return your love.

Maybe one day it’ll be him.

#miguel o'hara #miguel ohara #across the spiderverse #miguel ohara imagine #miguel o hara #miguel ohara x reader #atsv miguel #miguel ohara oneshot #miguel ohara x y/n #miguel ohara fic #miguel ohara x you #Miguel ohara angst #miguel o’hara fic #spider man 2099 #Spotify

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allmoshnobrain · 6 months

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𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫'𝐬 𝐬𝐞𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐭

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

james hetfield x wife!reader | word count: 2746 | ao3 link

You'd be lying if you said you saw this coming. Sure, you've had your fair share of rebellious, reckless moments. It was often a reaction to your mom's nagging or your dad's emotional absence. Jumping out the bedroom window trying to run away and breaking your arm at 13. Skipping classes to make out with your boyfriend in his car at 15. Running away from home a few months after graduating High School with a guy 8 years older, only to dump him a week after arriving in Los Angeles and somehow managing to get by on your own. Compared to all that, having sex with your husband at your cousin's wedding reception seemed downright mild.

✦ on this fic: NSFW!!!, james hefield x female!reader, +18, language, romance, mxf sex, unprotected sex, creampie, oral sex, reader has mommy issues lol

You never really cared for family gatherings. Escaping the small-town life when you were young was a breath of fresh air, but occasionally, there were those moments when you felt compelled to show up, no matter how dysfunctional the family could be. Especially in moments like this; with your cousin tying the knot, it seemed less of a hassle to be present than absent.

Yet, at your cousin's wedding reception, it was inevitable that you'd end up doing what you usually did around your family: hiding. This time, you found yourself tucked away in a small office you found while exploring the place, relishing a few moments of peace and quiet before returning to the party.

“Finally found you.”

You looked up and locked eyes with your husband, James, as he casually leaned against the door, slowly bringing a whiskey glass to his lips. A small smile tugged at the corners of your mouth when you saw him; James looked too good in formal attire, even better than usual, if that was even possible.

“Hey, handsome,” you whispered. Despite having been married for just over a year, he was still somewhat of a stranger to your family, mainly because you were too. You couldn't help but feel a twinge of guilt for leaving him alone in a crowd of mostly unfamiliar faces. "Sorry for ditching you. I just needed a little breather."

"Something up?" he strolled into the room and propped himself against the desk, his serious eyes scanning your face for any signs of trouble. You smiled, coming closer to him instinctively. You couldn’t help it; whenever you were around him, you felt like a small moth, helplessly drawn to his fire. Stepping closer to him, you ended up right between his legs, letting out a contented hum when he set his whiskey glass down on the desk and wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling you close. "Hey," he called, redirecting your attention to his question. It was so damn easy to get distracted around him; all you wanted was to touch and feel him, even when he was concerned about you. Maybe especially then. "Something on your mind?"

"It’s all good," you whispered, and he snorted. You arched an eyebrow, and he smiled.

"Come on, sweetheart. You only pull this vanishing act when something's bugging you." He tilted your chin up with a finger, making you meet his earnest blue gaze. "What's eating at you? You know you can tell me."

You let out a sigh. It wasn't that you didn't want to open up to James about the million and one ways your mother had to drive you up the wall whenever you two were around each other. But you knew that James and his mom used to be tight. He missed her a ton, and you didn't want to come across as selfish, complaining about something that might not even be that big of a deal.

"You've got a little pout going," James teased, his voice holding a hint of a smile as he pressed his thumb against your lower lip. Tugging your face closer, he planted a quick peck on your lips. "C'mon, spill the beans. What's bugging you? Did I mess up somehow?"

"It's no big deal," you whispered. The mere idea of him assuming for even a second that your frustration had anything to do with him was enough to make you blurt it out. "It's just... It's my mom."

"Oh, no. What did she do this time?" James chimed in with a chuckle, though it was evident he felt relieved that you were finally opening up. You couldn't help but laugh, putting your arms around his neck, your irritation momentarily forgotten. James had this incredible knack for making everything seem okay, no matter the circumstances. It was one of the reasons you fell head over heels for him – how safe he made you feel. He had this way of lightening the mood without even trying.

"She's being such a pain in the ass," you admitted. "Constantly bugging me about when we're gonna start a family. Telling us it's not okay to be married this long without even trying to have kids. We haven't even been married for that long! She's so annoying, it makes me want to run for the hills."

"I could have a chat with her if you want," he suggested, grinning mischievously while his hands gently caressed your hips. "I could tell her we've been going at it hard every night . How I’ve been cumming inside you every day…”

"James!" you exclaimed, and he erupted into laughter. "You can't say that!"

"I'm not going to, dummy," he teased, and you let out a snort. He planted a playful kiss on your lips, then continued, "Unless you want me to. It could be hilarious to see her reaction."

"No, don't! It would be a disaster. She's way too uptight to take it as a joke," you groaned, feeling your cheeks flush. "And besides, it's not even true."

"Hmm? What's not true?" he arched an eyebrow, a broader grin spreading across his face as he pulled you closer. "I'd say our love life is quite active, babe."

"It is, it's just... never mind," you muttered, your face growing even warmer. He raised his eyebrows, pulling you even nearer, his lips grazing your earlobe, sending shivers down your spine. He smelled of cologne, and alcohol.

"You know I hate being in the dark, darling. You're gonna have to spill it."

"James, it's nothing," you whispered, and he grunted before giving your thigh a squeeze. You blushed, taken aback by his sudden change in demeanor.

"I'm not asking, sweetheart," his hand drifted from your waist to your back, then down to your ass, causing you to gasp in surprise as he squeezed the soft skin through your dress.

"It's really nothing! I just meant..." you stammered, your heart racing from the embarrassment. "You know, you haven't been, uh, cumming… Inside…"

He pulled back, gave you a quick, amused look, and then burst into laughter, which only deepened your embarrassment.

"James, oh God, stop laughing! " you complained, your face burning as you tried to pull away from him. He wasn't having it, though; he wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling you even closer before planting playful kisses on your cheek, once, twice, three times.

"You're adorable," he laughed, and you rolled your eyes. "I didn't realize this was such a big deal for you, though. I thought we agreed I'd always use a condom?"

"We did! We did. I don't know why I said that. I'm sorry," you quickly clarified, your face still a little flushed. He smiled, cupping your chin in his hand to make you look at him.

"You don't need to apologize for anything," he said in the sweetest tone, then flashed a mischievous grin and added, "I mean, I'd be more than glad to cum inside you anytime you want."

"You're impossible," you huffed, and he laughed.

"And you love me anyway. But seriously, babe, if you ever want anything, just let me know. I know we agreed not to have kids for now..."

"It's not about that," you said, quickly. It wasn't that you didn't want to have kids, but you also didn't want to follow in your mom's footsteps – having kids too early in a marriage and then regretting it. Not that you felt you would ever regret anything with James by your side, but you just wanted to enjoy being just the two of you for a while before adding a little one to the mix. "It’s just, that one time we did it raw, it was so amazing. So I thought... Maybe on my safe days..." Your voice dropped to a whisper as you watched James' grin widen. Oh, God. He looked like a kid who had just won a lifetime supply of candy.

You were beginning to feel like maybe you shouldn't have said anything when he leaned in closer, his smile wide, and whispered:

"Wanna do it now?"

Compared to all that, having sex with your husband at your cousin's wedding reception seemed downright mild.

You moaned as James slowly explored your neck with his lips and tongue, his fingers skillfully untying the knot of your dress, letting it slide down to reveal your bare breasts. He grunted in appreciation, grasping one of them firmly in his hand, his fingers circling your nipple slowly while he sucked on the other. Your fingers tangled in his hair, a sharp moan escaping your lips as he bit your nipple softly. He pulled back, raising his eyes at you with a smug grin on his face.

"Better keep it down, babe. We don't need anyone to hear us, do we?" he teased, and you shook your head, your cheeks blushing as he kissed you passionately, his tongue invading your mouth.

You could taste the whiskey in his breath as he kissed you, one of his hands grabbing the base of your neck as he pulled you closer to him. You pressed your hand against his crotch, feeling his hard on through his pants. He groaned, his lips going down to your neck again as he finished pulling your dress down, leaving you only on your lace panties as you stood in front of him. You unzipped his pants, pulling them down quickly, a small sigh escaping your lips when you saw his hard cock spring free.

You kneeled in front of him, holding his cock by the base before licking on the tip. You moved your hand slowly, pressing the tip to your palm and massaging it before going down to his balls, pressing your tongue against the sensitive skin of his tip and feeling the salty taste of his precum. He let out a throaty moan, his knuckles turning white with the strength he used to grip the desk hard and keep himself steady. You raised your eyes to look at him, a sly grin on your lips.

“What did you say about keeping it down, again?” you asked, and he grunted, using one of his hands to grab a fistful of your hair, pushing your head down back to his aching erection.

“No talking.” he said, using the other hand to grab his cock by the base, pressing it against your lips.

You opened your mouth obediently, moaning against his skin when he pushed it into your mouth slowly. You tried to keep your breath steady; he was so big it was hard not to choke, even if he was moving as slow as his temper would allow. You moved your head up and down, increasing your pace while you squeezed his thighs with your fingertips. He moaned again, all restraints forgotten as he enjoyed how good you made him feel, arching his hips as his grip on your hair tightened, moving your head up and down even faster.

You gasped in surprise as he abruptly pushed you away with a grunt.

“My bad, babe, oh shit . It felt so good,” he mumbled, his voice quivering just a bit. He raised your chin, his slightly blurry eyes locking onto yours as he used his thumb to clear the drool around your swollen lips. “Want to cum inside your pretty pussy today, okay?” he whispered, and you nodded, lips slightly open as his words made your pussy clench in anticipation. “Get up.”

You got back on your feet, wrapping your arms around his neck again, moaning in satisfaction when he squeezed your hips with his big hands, getting on his feet too as one of his hands went down to grab your ass firmly. You moaned into his kiss when his fingers went down even further, pressing your clit before penetrating your cunt without warning.

“You’re so wet.” he whispered, and you moaned again when he started moving his fingers inside you, pressing the palm of his hand against your clit as he curled them inside. “Gonna walk around the party full of my cum, yeah? Gonna fill you up real good, babe. Do you want that?”

“Yes, p-please!” you whimpered, half in pleasure, half in frustration as he pulled his fingers out of you. He laughed, pressing his forehead against yours.

“We’ll come together, okay?” he said, and you nodded. You gasped when he grabbed you by your hips, turning you around with your hands against the desk, standing behind you as he grabbed your ass, spreading one of the cheeks apart to look at your throbbing pussy. You moaned when he pressed his cock against your entrance, pushing inside you. “ Fuck , babe. This is too good. Oh, shit. ” he whispered, and you moaned again, louder this time, tears pooling in your eyes as you felt his huge cock spreading your pussy.

This was too much; you could feel everything as he moved, his fingertips digging into your waist’s skin as he moaned too. You were too lost in pleasure to care about keeping it down now; everything felt so good, more intense than anything you had ever tried before. He kept pushing deeper and deeper, his thrusts getting stronger as he moaned your name, and you knew that there was no coming back after this; you were addicted to the high of having him inside of you, you could give him anything he wanted from you right now.

“James, oh God, James!” you moaned, quickly approaching your high as he pushed even faster inside you.

He couldn't help but moan, his hands all over you, grabbing your hips, your ass, your breasts; it was as if he couldn’t get enough of touching you, as if he wanted to bring you closer and closer as he felt your skin against his. You bit your lip, holding back a sob when he started massaging your clit as he thrusted deep inside you; it was almost too much pleasure to take.

You could feel his cock twitch inside you as he approached his orgasm, the overwhelming pleasure of his bare skin against yours making your pussy contract as you came, squeezing his cock inside of you. He moaned, thrusting one last time as he came too, his semen filling you up and dripping down your thighs as he pulled out. He grabbed your hip, spinning you around like it was no big deal. You let out a sigh, your breath shaky. Your head fell back as you tried to catch your breath, your pussy still twitching.

"Fuck… I need to freshen up," you whispered. He groaned, quickly pulling on his pants before approaching you once more. He grabbed your thigh, pushing it so your pussy would be in full view, and then used his fingers to push back the cum dripping down from it inside you.

"No need," he said casually, his fingertips going to your clit and making you moan softly. "We don't want to waste this, right? You're gonna get dressed and head back there like a good girl."

"But, James..." you began, your cheeks heating up as you thought about what he was suggesting. He grunted, yanking you closer by the hips.

"No 'buts,' babe. You're gonna do as I say, got it?"

"Yeah," you murmured, your heart racing as you wrapped your arms around his neck. James knew how much you loved it when he took charge like this; how it made you want him so bad you could barely think about anything but him. He grinned, pleased that his authoritative tone got the reaction he wanted from you.

"Great," he whispered, his thumb teasing your lower lip. "And when this party’s over, we're heading back to the hotel. You better be ready, because I’m gonna fuck you real good, all night long, yeah?"

The rest of the party? You couldn't even focus on it after that.

✧ thanks for reading! requests are open here ✧

#i thought about early 90s james for this #but honestly it could be any era after that too lol #this wasn't my best smut but i hope you guys like it!#metallica #metallica imagines #metallica headcanon #james hetfield #james hetfield headcanon #james hetfield x reader #james hetfield x you #james hetfield smut #metallica x reader #metallica x you #james hetfield fanfiction #metallica fanfiction #ada writes fanfiction

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vickyvicarious · 9 months

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The death alarms must be blaring loud in Mina's ears by now. "God bless and keep him" is as if she wants to manifest him being alive. While getting radio silence from him, coupled with her new friend telling her that he'll soon die (which made her tear up), and then Indeed Dying, her reading about the ship of death, the funerals...

Absolutely, they're blaring nonstop.

She hasn't heard from Jonathan in a long time. Actually, let's take a look at this timeline of Jonathan's letters...

12 May - Sent two letters (one each to Mina and Mr. Hawkins) on Dracula's behest saying he's leaving in a month.

19 May - Made to write three dictated letters.

28 May - Real letters confiscated, shorthand one to Mina burned. One supposedly sent to Mr. Hawkins telling him to talk to Mina (may have just been a taunt from Dracula/may not have actually been sent).

12 June - Expected departure based on 12 May letter. Dictated letter that he'll be leaving in a few more days mailed.

19 June - Dictated letter that he's leaving the next day mailed.

29 June - Dictated letter that he is in Bistritz mailed.

1 July - Mina presumably receives letter from 12 May (see 1 August). Expects him home soon based on the contents.

25 July - Letter to Mr. Hawkins arrives (forwarded to Mina next day). Seems to be the one sent on 19 June based on the contents.

1 August - Mina says she hasn't heard from him in a whole month (probably referencing a letter to her specifically, must be the one from 12 May). "I hope there cannot be anything the matter with Jonathan."

3 August - "Oh, I do hope he is not ill."

8 August - "Somehow I felt glad that Jonathan was not on the sea last night, but on land. But, oh, is he on land or sea? Where is he, and how?"

10 August - "I should be quite happy if I only knew if Jonathan.... God bless and keep him."

So yeah, it seems like she hasn't gotten a letter directly from Jonathan in over a month - and I'm willing to bet that letter wasn't super effusive. It still was nowhere near as alarming as the one she was forwarded from Mr. Hawkins later, though. That one is even more directly dictated by Dracula and she's very clear that it doesn't seem like Jonathan's usual writing style. She even suspects a forgery, but his handwriting convinces her otherwise in the end.

If I'm reading this correctly, it took about 8 weeks for Mina to get the letter Jonathan wrote on 12 May, and about 5 weeks for Mr. Hawkins to get the one sent on 19 June. Assuming the latter timeline is more typical (since who knows how long Dracula took to get around to mailing that first letter; the later three are specifically dated), the letter saying he's in Bistritz is actually already running a week late. (If we split the difference, then it could be expected very soon, though.) Meanwhile, for all Mina knows Jonathan left the castle just about two months ago and hasn't communicated at all since. Setting aside that it should not take him that long to come home (I don't have the time right now to look up how long the journey is supposed to take, but definitely less than this), it's still wildly out of character for him not to let her know if he has been delayed further for some reason.

So yeah, that's all deeply alarming. And then we get on to her pleasantly distracting summer vacation, which so far is anything but. Lucy is sleepwalking, Mrs. Westenra is freaked about it, Mina has to watch over her and thus is getting little sleep herself. This doubtless increases her stress levels on its own, but I suspect also is what leads her to hint at him possibly being ill. She does the same thing later on; after there is a bad storm and a ship crashes ashore with no one alive aboard, she doubts whether he is on sea and wonders where he is. And then today, after attending the funeral/after her friend's death, she comes close to wondering if he is even alive, before trailing off and just praying for him instead.

All the bad stuff happening around her keeps making her think of what might be happening to Jonathan too, and the possibilities are just steadily getting worse... but all could end in death. Maybe he caught some illness and died with no one looking after him (Lucy). Maybe he was traveling on a ship and drowned in a storm (Demeter). Maybe he was attacked and murdered (Mr. Swales - though Mina doesn't say he has been, the nature of his death could easily remind her of such a possibility).

Maybe this all happened weeks ago.

She has no way of knowing, and thus nothing she can do about it. Last she heard he'd left the castle, so even if she wanted to go search for him (and somehow found the money for a sustained search), she wouldn't have any clear destination. It's just "somewhere between Transylvania and England" and that's a big space. So all she can do is worry over him. Try to deny the possibility.

Pray.

#dracula daily #mina murray #jonathan harker #jonmina #anonymous #replies

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ballerinainskzville · 1 year

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Let me take care of you pt. 2 - Bangchan one shot

Summary: your husband, Bangchan, is helping you ease the pain of your 8 month old pregnant belly.

Thank you for the idea, @pettypuppy-jonghyun! I hope this does your idea justice 🫶🏻

“Noona, the baby is due in less than a month now, right?”, Felix asked you as he handed you the plate with the cheesecake. “Thank you, Yongbok. And yes, the due date is in 28 days. But she can come sooner or later”, you explained to him before taking the first bite of the cake.

Your 8-month pregnant belly was aching painfully today. From the swollen feet to the splitting back pain, the last trimester of the pregnancy began to get into you. You grew more and more impatient every time your bladder needed a release. Which was every few minutes.

You used to break down to your husband, Bangchan, due to the hormonal rollercoasters and fear of becoming a good mother in the first trimester. Now it was mostly due to the thinning nerves. You wanted to hold your daughter in your arms, now. But she wasn’t due yet, Bangchan kept on calming you down by repeating the same words: “I know baby, you’re doing amazing. You’re so strong, do you know that? I’d love to carry the little wolf in my arms now too but she has a few more weeks to go, she has to finish developing so she’s all healthy”. He’d hold you close for hours, repeatedly kissing you to cheer you up afterward. You felt bad for acting like a stubborn child but you really couldn’t help it.

Bangchan was at the JYP headquarters with the rest of 3RACHA in a meeting to talk about the planning of the group schedule for the next months. Bangchan had requested to get fewer activities that involved him being by your side for the rest of the pregnancy and the labor. Which was barely impossible since he was the leader of the group and stray kids members had abandonment fear. Instead of minimizing group activities, the suggestion of the new subunit, Minsung, was brought to the table. Hyunjin was busy filming the art show that had been on national tv for the past month. Which meant reduced group activities for the upcoming weeks.

Knowing the circumstances of the job of your husband, you were glad that adjusting the group activities and promotions was even possible. He loved his job, he had poured every single day of his life since was a kid into his dream. He gave up on sleep, food, friends, family, and other opportunities along the road over and over just in fear he’d neglect his dream of being on stage. Back in your dating days, you’d have to force him together with his members to take a nap when he was sick. Sick as in barely able to stand on his kind sick.

He had asked Felix to keep you company and help you out since your body ached since you woke up this morning. You both had played multiple rounds on the switch and watched older videos of the group, laughing over the memories. Before you become pregnant, you’d travel with the band as a staff member for hair and make-up. You were Felix’ makeup artist before so you two naturally bonded the easiest. Then you’d become the makeup artist of both Felix and Bangchan, taking care of the looks of the Aussie line.

“You women are like superheroes, noon. I watched the documentary that Hyunjin send me, about what pregnancy does to your body and it was insane. Mothers are truly strong, they give up so much too. I called my mom afterward and apologized that she gave birth to me”, he said with furrowed eyebrows, making you laugh. “Oh Felix, you truly are an angel walking on earth. But it’s true, I was surprised myself by the female anatomy during pregnancy, it does more than someone would think”, you took the last bite of the cheesecake.

“Do you want to go for a walk and get some fresh air?”, he suggested. But you just shook your head. “No, thank you, sweetheart. My belly feels like it’s weighing an additional 10 pounds today”.

Just then you heard the front door of your apartment open, and shortly later your husband entered the living room. “Guess who’s back”, he goofily said and waved. “Thank you for watching after Y/N, Lix. Changbin and Jisung are downstairs in the car if you want to join them. They are going to play bowling”. The blonde-haired guy nodded eagerly and stood up. “Bye hyung, bye noona!”, he waved and you waved back. “Take care, Yongbok! Thank you for spending the day with me”, you gave him a sincere smile. “No need to thank me for that, noona. Your family!”, he then disappeared.

“How’s my beloved wife and the little wolf doing today?”, Bangchan asked as he kneeled in front of you, eye to eye with you. “The lie or the truth?”, you asked him, biting down on your lip as your daughter threw a strong kick inside you. She was training to play soccer, that was for sure.

“The truth, always the truth, baby”, your husband said and took your hand into his, kissing the top of it. “Is it worse than this morning?”, he asked to which you simply hooded. You were cheerful when you spend time with Felix but now that your husband asked you for your well-being, he unraveled something inside you. You felt your bottom lip tremble as you looked into the face of your husband. “It hurts a lot, Channie. I just want her out now”.

“Baby”, he said softly and stood between your lungs, cooing you into his embrace. Nestled into his chest, you hold tightly onto him as he caressed your hair and back, leaving endless kisses on the top of your head. You began to relax a little before another sharp pain rushed through your back and you yelped. “Ah-“, you pulled back and laid your back against the cushion of the couch. Bangchan held tightly onto your hand, worrying about finding a way to relieve your pain”

“Do you want me to lift your bump for a bit? That would relieve the weight and pressure on your back”, he said softly, caressing your knee while he watched you.

The doctor had suggested to you do a couple of lifts since your back pain had intensified at the beginning of the trimester. Bangchan had learned the right way to lift you and the belly from the physician’s instructions and did them every time your back felt like it was being split open. It did help, even if it was just for a short amount of time.

You nodded weakly and he reached out to tuck the strands of your curtain bangs behind your ear before helping you to stand up as gently as possible. Standing in the middle of the living room, he walked around to stand behind you, wrapping his arms around you. Placing his hands below your belly, he gently lifted it, and instantly, you felt the pressure lessen on your back and knees. You sighed in comfort and pressed your back more against your husband’s back. You both stood there, your pregnant belly in the hands of your husband.

“Ready?”, he whispered into your ear.

“Not really”, you mumbled, wanting a few more seconds of comfort.

“Okay, now I’m ready”, you sighed and Bangchan slowly and ever so gently retreated his arms from your belly, resting them on your hips instead, massaging them. The pressure returned and it irritated you more than before. But it would all be worth it, for your baby daughter. Just a few more weeks to go, you told yourself.

“You’re the best mother Leyla could ask for”, Bangchan whispered into your ear, pressing a side kiss onto your temple. “Let’s lay you down, and I’ll massage your legs and feet”, he said and guided you back to the couch.

Once you were settled down with pillows supporting your back, Chan began to massage your legs carefully. “I’m so full of water, I feel like a whale”, you whined. Your legs looked like they were twice their usual size. “You’re not, baby. You’re still the beautiful woman that I fell in love with. You just have these painful swellings due to the water your body storages”, he said softly, working on the swellings.

#skz #skz oneshots #skz scenarios #stray kids #bang chan #stray kids scenarios #stray kids bangchan #bang chan oneshot #bang chan imagines #bang chan scenarios #stray kids bang chan #stray kids fluff #stray kids imagines

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yuurei20 · 5 months

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Hello, Yuurei! Do you know if there is a timeline for the main story and events that would make for the best reading order? Even something as vague as "Beanfest is between books 3 and 4" to make a nice little roadmap for rereading purposes? Thank you so much if you can answer this!

Hello hello!! Thank you so much for this question, this was all so interesting to look into!

Reading order for events can be complicated, as the game seems to be playing with the timeline! For every "this is the order of events" compilation I found there was a disclaimer of "except for these points, which don't fit into the continuity," and that might just be how it is until we learn more about what is going on behind the scenes :<

If that is all right, I have put together a rough list of a possible reading order! (Largely by cross referencing the events/main story with things like this graphic, this summary page, and several anonymous posting boards, to learn what theories are out there.)

⚠️JP-server event information included below!⚠️ ⚠️ Also, this is not meant to be a definitive calendar of events! Just an idea about a potential order in which to read things with the least amount of timeline weirdness ⚠️ (but there is still timeline weirdness)

#1: Prologue #2: Book 1 #3: Book 2 #4 Stage in Playfulland #5: Glorious Masquerade #6: Terror is Trending

At the beginning of Playfulland Ace mentions upcoming Halloween preparations and finals, but he doesn't mention the Interdorm Spelldrive Tournament, so it is possible that this event happens after Book 2 (which is specified as taking place in October) but before Halloween.

The biggest issue with this lineup is Ortho, who appears at the very beginning in his college gear, which he doesn't get until Book 6. But they mention Halloween so it must be early in the school year, and it cannot be October of the following year because Trey and Cater are still living in the dorm...if you can forgive Ortho's outfit in the opening scenes, Playfulland otherwise fits in nicely.

Things get complicated with Glorious Masquerade and Terror is Trending, as they seem to be taking place simultaneously: both events begin with two different characters announcing that there is one month left until Halloween.

I would recommend Glorious Masquerade first as we don't actually see Halloween happening at NRC (just Jack and Ace preparing for it), but both events are about lead-ups to two completely different Halloween celebrations being held on the same day and attended by many of the same people.

As the end of Terror is Trending connects directly to the start of Spectral Soiree, it might be less jarring to start with Glorious Masquerade.

The continuity curiosity that people generally point to with the Halloween events is that the prefect is present for multiple people referring to Malleus by name, when they don't actually know what his name is until Book 5.

But there is something consistent across both Glorious Masquerade and Spectral Soiree:

The prefect never calls Malleus anything but Hornton.

It is possible that the game is asking for some suspension of disbelief with this point? Was my theory, but the prefect also uses the "Hornton" moniker during Firelit Sky, so maybe that is just what they do?

#7 Spectral Soiree #8 Book 3 #9 Book 4 #10 New Year's #11 Book 5

Book 5 lasts over a month, with Vil scolding Epel for not practicing during what were ostensibly their winter holidays, so it may go from January to February (the day of the Culture Festival itself is specified as mid-February).

The snow on the main campus seems to completely disappear during the three weeks between Malleus being invited to the VDC and the day of the event, but they might have just cleared it away for the festival.

#12 Harveston

We know Harveston takes place during the winter but not exactly when. Epel recognizes the dwarves from Book 5, so reading it before 5 might feel odd.

#13 Book 6

Book 6 starts only a few days after Book 5 and might technically come before Harveston, but from a reading-order perspective seeing Idia invite himself along to Epel's hometown right after kidnapping several people might be jarring.

Due to the timing of Harveston's initial release Ortho wears his pre-6 archetype gear for Harveston, which is also a point in favor of Harveston happening beforehand (a very busy few days for Epel and Idia). It will be interesting to see if Ortho gets changed to his college gear for the rerun, coming soon to JP server.

#14 Beanfest (1 and 2)

#15 Fairy Gala / Fairy Gala IF

#16 Vargas Camp (1+2)

The only hint we have for the two Vargas Camps is the knowledge that they happen within two weeks of one another and the title of the original event: Spring Happening.

#17 Rabbit Fes

I wasn't able to find any reference to when Rabbit Fes might be happening, but Ortho in his college gear places it after Book 6, and it is heavily spring coded.

#18 Phantom Bride

I was not able to find any specific timing for the Phantom Bride event, but we know there is not any snow on the main street, so presumably it is not during winter.

It seems to be generally assumed by fans that it takes place in June because of the June Bride tradition, and everyone's reluctance to do anything for Idia makes even more sense than usual if it is post Book 6.

#19 Tamashina-Mina

Was also not able to find anything specific for the timing of Tamashina-Mina, but we know it is hot (Jack faints from heat stroke).

Leona mentions a rainy season and Japan's rainy season goes from June to July, so summer seems like a safe bet (it also makes sense to be separated far away from Book 2, considering Leona and Lilia's drama).

#20 Wish Upon a Star

The Starsending also does not seem to have a specified month or season, but it is generally assumed to be happening in July because the event was heavily inspired by Japan's Tanabata, which is on July 7th. (more here!) Tanabata is also referenced by name in the original game.

Like Playfulland, Wish Upon a Star’s main continuity issue is also Ortho: it is mentioned specifically that he cannot participate in the event because he is not actually a student at the school.

He becomes a student in Book 6, which seems like it should put this event before it, except for the Star Rogue subplot. Idia and Ortho discuss the discontinued video game in Book 6, a sequel is Idia’s wish for Wish Upon a Star, and at the end of the event this wish is granted, which hadn't happened as of 6.

No matter where you read Wish Upon a Star there is going to be some weirdness, so it may be best to decide based on personal preference! If Ortho still not being a student despite having just enrolled is more of a deal breaker than the Star Rogue subplot, it might be better to read it prior to 6.

#21 Lost in the Book with Stitch

Floyd has a line about summer vacation coming soon.

#22 Firelit Sky

Interestingly there do not seem to be any references to Firelit Sky taking place in the summer, but it is generally assumed to be around summertime due to the climate and fireworks festival.

Najma has a line about being worried about Jamil, but the conversation wouldn't be out of place before or after Book 4. Firelit sky might be one of the more flexible events, capable of sliding in just about anywhere, but the atmosphere fits in well with the line up of the Stitch event and Portfest.

#23 Portfest

The Portfest event takes about a month overall, but the time of year is technically never specified, so we do not know what month.

The biggest hint we get might be Rook calling the portwear designs "summery and cool." The aesthetic might fit best with Stitch and Firelit Sky, for reading order purposes.

#24 Bonus: Tsumsted

I have no idea when Tsumsteds 1+2 are presumably taking place, but there is no snow on the main street. As they are light-hearted stories it might be best to enjoy them between events rather than the drama of the main story? Perhaps between Beanfest and Fairy Gala, or Vargas Camp and Rabbit Fest, etc.

I made a chart for reference while putting this post together! There may be better interpretations out there than what all has been listed above, so I will include it as well, for the curious:

(and as always if there is anything I have overlooked, please do let me know! ♡)

#twstask

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ufoend · 1 year

Text

∆ please help us

we can not afford any of our basic needs

i usually try to keep this as light as possible, but i have put this off for long enough that i have to post this. me and my partner desperately need help. we are just two gay people trying to make it alone here with absolutely no support system.

who we are: im j (or jet), im 24 year old trans guy whose had this account since 2014. i married my partner in 2018, we even met on tumblr when we were younger, we've been together for years. my partner is disabled (diagnosed with autism and seizure disorder and others)

what we need: our cat had an emergency surgery two years ago that means he needs to be on a prescription diet (hills urinary food) for his entire life. the vet suddenly said we need to bring him in again to get his prescription renewed and we cant order any more food for him until then, which he will not survive without, and he is not allowed to eat any alternative food without risking his life. we have less than half of a 8 lb bag of it which will not last him through the next month. with the vet, food, and ubers to get to the vet and to the only place they sell the food = 200

to try to summarize our situation, we were kicked out by family and made officially homeless for the first time last year. this is right after we moved across states (wa to az) to support my partners family upon their request, only to be subjected to abuse and kicked out directly due to homophobia in an unfamiliar state after a few months. this left both of us and all of our animals entirely homeless. we luckily have an apartment now but our situation is still not okay. we lost all of our belongings at this time, everything, and have not been able to replace them as we have fixed income. my partner is especially affected by this situation, as it was traumatizing, and they have just had to power through trauma after trauma because of poverty, more than i can say.

i also have severe dental problems that are not covered by medicaid in az and i have no way to afford. this includes wisdom teeth, root canals, and many cavities that will turn into that crazy expensive treatment if i don't fix it. some may remember this (+this). i was only able to have a little bit of work done before we were homeless and one root canal failed. i cant keep ignoring it, because they are worried about two of the cavities becoming root canals, and i want to prevent another infection, but thats at least 250 each.

we are still not going to be able to afford rent in future months because our EBT was delayed last month and i had to spend money we don't have to afford anything, and now we are in serious jeopardy even affording rent, let alone bills. our pets (2 cats 1 small dog) also desperately need vaccinations, which is dangerous to keep going this overdue without with their health problems. our dog has also been limping for the past week and he needs to be seen when that is ever possible.

any donations would go first to the vet appointment and cat food, then the other needs in order of priority. will keep updating this, i know its a lot and i really don't expect anything, i am begging for help with any of this

we are both students, we are trying to work towards stability, while being stuck here. i do everything i can to bring in money to support us on my own. we make 200 less than rent is monthly. i am in school to become a caseworker so i am aware of a lot of resources in my area, and have applied for everything, but we can not do this alone which is why i have to ask for help. i am so sorry for having to do this but i appreciate any support that i do have because of this website. you guys literally save my life. helping out other poor people and getting helped out on here has been the most compassion ive ever been a part of. dollars, even pennies, worth of donations has kept my cat safe, has affected me in real ways. it actually matters to us, no matter the amount.

thank you anyone who reblogs, donates anything, or reaches out.

p*ypal email (best): [email protected]

v*nmo: @tobler707

c*shapp: $tobler707

#date: 11/3/22 #signal boost #please reblog #please help #please read #please boost #i may have to make a tldr of this and just link to it since there is no way i can explain all of this in any shorter way #so hard to make this shit #i hate having to beg for my life forever #so sorry to my mutuals #thank you if you always boost me #cats #dogs #vet care #vet costs

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shortpplfedup · 1 year

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Chapter 8: The Self-made House and Home

I'm struggling with this one because it was so perfect. For the second time in as many weeks, a GMMTV BL completely sticks the landing, in a gentle, satisfying conclusion to a story that felt so healing to me in a lot of ways. We don't often get stories about people out of the first flush of youth in BL, and we even less often get family dramas, generational stories. And we almost never get something this real, this grounded, this lived in. This show is going to stay with me, somewhere deep. In this final episode we say goodbye to the Moonlight Chicken Diner, and the denizens thereof, as life goes on without us.

I've been unsure about the signs that Heart and Li Ming were contemplating leaving together for the US, because it didn't feel like there was much of a plan for Heart, and it felt like a lot to put the responsibility for the accommodations Heart would need to thrive on Li Ming. I should have known Aof would ground this story like all the others in a reality that is more sensible. Li Ming in a sense following Heart instead of the other way around makes the plan work. Will they make it together? Who knows, but they're going to try, each walking their own path next to each other, which is the healthiest way when you're young. Heart hinting around the commitment he wants from Li Ming was adorably shy, and Li Ming's response was delightfully cheeky, completely their dynamic. So off the young lovers are going to America.

Alan and Gaipa making the decisions to firmly let go of Wen and Jim respectively is a new beginning for each of them. It still hurts though; Alan telling Wen he can walk on his own and leaving their photos behind when he moves out of their condo; Gaipa realising that Jim's smiles are for Wen and not him and declining the invitation to attend the diner's closing party. Sometimes the bone has to be broken cleanly to heal correctly. A few months later, when they see them again, Alan still feels awkward, but he can say Wen is his friend, and Gaipa can see Jim without awkwardness between them. The tentative first steps of Alan and Gaipa toward each other feels like the right way to leave both of those stories. Both of them are no longer reeling, but they're still grieving and healing from their losses. In the midst of all that, they've noticed each other over the two months that they've been meeting to settle Ms. Hong's affairs, to the point that Alan has started inventing reasons to extend the process, and to try moving their interactions out of the purely professional realm. Their little 'khrap'-off every time they meet is ADORABLE, perfect depiction of that initial awkward stage of 'I think I like this person, and I think this person likes me'. It may become nothing, may become something, but Ms. Hong was the kind of lady who'd brag about her cute, single, gay son to anybody who looked like a possible, so we leave them with hope.

I like the way Jim and Wen still don't rush into anything, despite knowing how they feel. Wen still buys his own place; even as he establishes his place in Jim's home, he also lets Jim know he belongs in Wen's home too. Wen helps out at the new Moonlight Chicken, but it's Jim's business, not a shared business. Wen keeps his day job, even as he turns down a promotion because he would have to move. They are together, they are home to each other, but they are still independent, still themselves. Given both of their histories, that feels right for their relationship. Maybe someday they will want to consolidate more, maybe they never will, but for now they are absolutely contented with the way things are, because they are 100% committed in love and partnership. Jim takes Wen to Sakhon Nakhon, to Jam's home with her new husband and his daughter, and introduces Wen as his boyfriend. And when Jam calls him 'brother in law' Wen demurs, 'I'm just his boyfriend'. They're perfectly content with what they are for now. When we see them in the epilogue, finally watching Jim's favourite movie, they're clearly still in the honeymoon phase of their relationship, the desire is there, but it feels settled, mellowed, lived in. It feels grown, and that's the thing I have loved most about Jim and Wen's path to get here, turbulent as it has been. These are two mature people with their own baggage, who found each other in the most unbelievable way, and walked an unconventional path to form a family that feels wholly and solely them. As much as I can't forgive Beam, Moonlight Chicken needed to exist for Wen to walk into it someday, and it would never have existed without Jim and Beam's love. And Wen needed to be dissatisfied with his life to embrace the magic of the night he and Jim met, and keep embracing it, and that wouldn't have happened without Alan either. They're not here despite their pasts, but because of them.

Li Ming is still not sure how he feels about his mother, whether he loves her or not, but he knows he bears her no ill will and he genuinely wants her to be happy. He sees her clearly, without any of the filters which usually sit on our gaze of our parents when we're young. The way he stares at her while she drinks the boba tea he bought her, almost as though he's searching her, searching himself about how he feels, tells me that these two may yet find their way to a closer relationship. Because Li Ming may not be sure he loves his mother, but the kind of relationship they have matters to him nonetheless, that's why he gives her his blessing to get married again, that's why he gives her his apron. Jam knows she's been a bad mother, and she is trying so hard, so desperately to be a better one. Buying Li Ming those cute, childish socks that he nevertheless accepts with a certain fondness, shows how she still sees him, and how far they have to go. But buying him the shoes he so clearly wanted after he rejects her own choice shows that she does acknowledge that he is grown now, and can decide what he wants. When he takes Heart to Sakhon Nakhon with him, to meet his mother's new family, his new family, they are much warmer than they have been. She listens to him quietly, not pushing, and accepts Heart as his person. And the way that she contrives to pay for his work/study programme in America, not offering the money to him outright which she knew he wouldn't feel comfortable with and wouldn't accept, but giving Jim the means to take a loan which she would pay off herself, shows that she understands the depth of the brokenness of their relationship, but she will do whatever she can to repair at least some of the damage.

Jim and Li Ming's loving, tumultuous relationship has been at the centre of this show for me. I'm Jim's age, so I know how he feels, what he worries about, his drive to protect Li Ming from the slings and arrows of the world the best way he knows how. But I remember what it felt like to be young and chomping at the bit to be released from the parental reins and take on life on my own terms. I also remember what it felt like when I was on the cusp of doing just that, and was suddenly hit with a wave of tenderness and compassion and just pure love for my parents. I wanted to leave them, but I also never wanted to leave them. Li Ming asking Jim 'are you tired?' and Jim's surprised response at being asked that question by Li Ming, quite likely for the first time felt so real. It's like now that Li Ming is an adult on the verge of forging his own path through life, he can see Jim as a person and not just a parent, a tired person who's doing their best, and who has loved and looked after him in the best way he knows how. Most of us, not all granted but most, forgive our parents for a lot as we grow older; it's part of the circle of life. Li Ming and Jim will fight again in life, a LOT, but that's because of the love, the bond, the expectations each has for the other. You can't fight the way those two do with somebody you don't love with all your heart. Jim responding to Li Ming's surprising question with a surprising question of his own 'when did you know yourself?' is acknowledging Li Ming as a person as well, not just as a child, his child. He's asking 'hey, when did you grow up huh?'. And god, I feel that so deeply as somebody whose own nephew who I'm helping raise walked for the first time yesterday. 'Wait, when did you get here?' is such a REAL sentiment from a parent to a child. The love between these two is overflowing, so Jim voices it in his own way. 'I'm glad you found what you like. Please know that you do nothing wrong.' This is on the surface about Li Ming's sexuality, but on a deeper level it's Jim telling Li Ming 'I love you, I'm happy for you, I'm in your corner, I have your back.' And then Li Ming also says I love you in his own way. 'Staying with you is the best. Thank you Uncle, for everything.' That's all you ever want to hear from your kid.

Goodbye Moonlight Chicken, goodbye Pattaya, goodbye Jim and the family you built from nothing, and thank you Aof for giving us this story.

Side Dishes

I wanted to see Saleng and Praew's baby, but it was probably difficult to get a baby actor. Ah well. Saleng getting a stable, well-paying job and thriving at it, but still dreaming of one day running his own chicken rice diner like the man who became a father figure to him made me tear up.

Jim turning Moonlight Chicken into a food truck out in the open under the moon felt exactly right, the combination of letting go of the pain of the past while holding on to the good things it gave him, and giving him the freedom to up sticks and move if he ever wants to.

Heart giving Li Ming his name sign, and also vocalising his name because he knows Li Ming loves hearing his voice...crying in the club. Everybody in the little family unit learning sign, including Jam immediately giving it a try...BAWLING in the club.

'The right love consists of the right person, and the right time, at midnight, at a chicken rice diner.'

What on EARTH did Alan message Gaipa?!🤣

#moonlight chicken #midnight series: moonlight chicken #the moon is beautiful tonight #bl meta series

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walker-extended-universe · 3 months

Text

It Started in the Cabin, Chapter 1

Relationship(s): Trevor Strand/Stella Walker, August Walker & Stella Walker, Cordell Walker & Stella Walker, Geri Broussard & Stella Walker

Tags/Warnings: Alternate Universe, Teen Pregnancy, Pregnancy, Morning Sickness, Awkward Conversations, Pregnancy Tests, Angst, Angst and Feels, Family Feels

Summary: What if Stella got pregnant from her and Trevor's tryst at the cabin?

Written for @febuwhump Prompt 8: "Why won't it stop?"

Taglist: @theladywyn, @ihavepointysticks, @klaatu51, @itsjessiegirl1, @neptunium134

-------

When she first started feeling under the weather, Stella didn’t think much of it. The past few weeks had been nothing short of exhausting. Losing Trevor, finding him again, trying and failing to run away, having her family held hostage, almost losing Liam, completely losing Hoyt, and losing Trevor again….. It was like one long nightmare and the grief that followed seemed like it would never let up.

So feeling a little sick wasn’t exactly unexpected. Even her period being off by a few days didn’t strike her as odd. It happened during times of stress.

But when the end of the month rolled around and her period still hadn’t come and she was still feeling less-than-great, she got worried.

Freshman year sex ed hadn’t been the most educational experience but Emily had made sure both of her kids understood more than just the basics required of the US education system. She knew her symptoms weren’t sure signs of pregnancy (the female body was horrifically misunderstood by the medical community) but given her recent sexual history… It couldn’t hurt to check.

The trick would be checking without anyone finding out. She did not want to see how her dad would react to finding a pregnancy test in the trash, regardless of the result. But she didn’t want to be stuck finding out life-altering news in a public bathroom either. Which left her with…

The Side Step. Surely being an “owner” (well, future owner once she was a legal adult) gave her the right to commandeer a bathroom.

She went out, lying about meeting up with some friends, and bought two pregnancy tests from a corner store, just in case she got a false reading on the first one. Then, she drove to the bar and parked her car as discreetly as possible. She frowned at all the cars currently in the lot. She’d tried to time it so she’d be there when the bar wasn’t too busy but it looked like she was wrong. Grabbing the bathroom may be harder than she thought.

She slipped inside anyway. Then, she saw August bussing a table and got an idea.

She sidled up to up as he headed for the kitchen. “Do you think you could take a break right now?” she asked quietly.

He glanced at her quizzically but nodded. “Sure. Why?”

“Meet me in the bathroom and I’ll explain. Oh, and bring a water bottle.”

“Stel, what-”

But she was already gone, off to the back of the bar where the ladies’ room was. Thankfully, it was empty and there was no line. She leaned on the edge of one of the sinks until August came in.

“What’s going on?” he asked, handing her the water bottle.

Stella sighed. “I… It might be nothing but…. I think I’m pregnant and I needed a safe place to take a test without Dad freaking out.”

“Jesus, Stel.” August leaned against the wall. “I- Okay. And you thought this would be a good place to do it?”

“I didn’t think it’d be this busy…”

“It’s 4 o’clock on a Friday,” he deadpanned. “You’re lucky that meant Aunt Geri was too busy to see you come in.”

“Yeah, I know.” She sighed. “Look, I’ve gotta chug this water and wait for the test results. Do you think you could… I don’t know, stand guard or something?”

August shook his head and turned the little lock on the door. “I’m not leaving you alone for this. We should be okay in here for a while.”

Stella smiled. “Thank you.”

Now it was just a waiting game. Waiting to need to pee, waiting for the results, all while hoping no one bothered them.

It was agony.

“It’ll be okay,” August promised as the timer ticked down. “Whatever happens, we all have your back.”

Stella cut him a look. “Really? You think Dad won’t have a conniption if I am pregnant? And what about Mawline?”

“Okay, yeah, they’ll freak,” he admitted. “But they’ll come around. They always do.”

“I hope you’re right.”

All too soon and not soon enough, the timer beeped. The results were ready.

Her hands shook as she flipped the tests over. Both were positive.

“Fuck.”

“Stel, it’s okay-”

“No, it’s not!” She put her hands up and tugged on her hair. “This is so far from okay. I’m pregnant, Auggie! Pregnant! Dad’s gonna freak, Mawline’s gonna freak, Gramps is gonna freak- What am I even gonna do? Am I ready to be a mom? Would Dad even let me keep it? What-”

“Hey, hey, take it easy.” August grabbed her arms and stilled her, pulling her into a hug. “It’s gonna be okay. We’ll figure it out. We always do.”

Stella hugged back, burying her face in his chest. “I hope you’re right.”

—--

“You really should tell them,” August said, leaning on the doorway to Stella’s room.

She groaned. “Auggie, we both know how that’s gonna go.”

“That doesn’t mean you can’t tell them.”

“I know. And I will. I just….” she sighed. “I just know they’re gonna start pushing me to figure out what I want to do about the baby right away and I just- I want to have some answers ready first.”

“And when is that gonna be? It’s not like you can keep this a secret forever.”

“You don’t think I know that?” she snapped. “I just- I need time to process first. Once I have some things figured out…. Then I’ll tell them.”

It would be easier if she could talk to Trevor. But he was in jail and he wouldn’t be getting out anytime soon and she wasn’t even sure how to tell him, not to mention the whole issue with him helping his dad take her family hostage and making her question everything she knew about him. There was a reason she kept dodging his calls. But a small part of her thought that if she just knew how he felt about it… Maybe that would make it easier to decide how she felt about it.

“Okay,” August said. “Just… don’t wait too long. It’ll only get worse if you do.”

“I know.”

Then, out of nowhere, Dad came up the stairs and told them they were going on an adventure to pick up Uncle Hoyt’s forgotten items at some homestead property he never got to finish buying.

—-----

Finding the little animal family Hoyt had put together was a blessing Stella didn’t know she needed. For once, there was something to think about, to talk about besides her grief and her secret.

Unfortunately, that also led them to a conflict when Dad insisted they couldn’t take the llama back to the ranch with them. “We can’t just give him away!” she insisted. “He’s- He’s Hoyt’s. And the mare’s all family bonded with him so- You can’t just give away her kid!”

“Stella,” he said firmly. “I know all that. But you know Gramps won’t keep a llama on the property. It’s probably better if we find a place that will keep the little guy now before-”

“Gramps can deal with it!” she snapped. “We can at least board the little guy for a few days. And Mawline will want to keep him. It- You can’t just split them up for no reason!”

“Stella, that’s enough.” Dad wasn’t giving in. “I know you don’t like this but we’re just not equipped to take care of him. We passed a place a few miles back that will probably take him in. It’s better this way, I promise.” He took the lead from her hand and started leading the llama away, apparently ignoring the animal’s cries.

She looked away and furiously rubbed tears from her eyes. Stupid pregnancy hormones.

“You okay?” August muttered.

“No.” She huffed. “Let’s just go. It’s getting late; the horses need rest.” She urged her horse forward.

“Hey….” Geri same up beside her. “Are you okay? I know this has been a bit of a rough day. If you need to talk…. I’m here.”

Oh, there was so much Stella wanted to talk about. So much she needed to talk about. Things she couldn’t really talk to Dad or August about. If anyone could help her get some perspective on this whole pregnancy mess, it would be Aunt Geri.

“Uh, actually… Could we talk? Later? Once we find a place to stay the night?”

Geri seemed surprised but nodded. “Sure, definitely. Just let me know when you’re ready.”

—------

Stella gently pet her horse’s neck and fed him an apple she got from the owner of the barn they were staying in for the night. In the stall next to her, Dad struggled to get the mare settled down. “She’s freaking out about somethin’; maybe there’s a mouse….”

“She’s probably wondering where her kid is,” Stella muttered.

Dad sighed. “Stel, not this again. I-”

“You did what you had to do. The responsible thing. I get it. Doesn’t mean I have to be happy about it.”

Once the horse was done eating, she left the stall and stormed up to the loft. August had found a little corner to snuggle in and Geri was setting out hay on the other side of the loft. Stella quietly stepped over to her side and sat next to her. “Can we talk now?”

Geri looked up and nodded. “Yeah, of course. What did you want to talk about?”

“Okay so….” Stella chewed her bottom lip. “Remember that trip I took with Trevor to his family’s cabin?”

“...Sure. What about it?”

“Well….” She took a deep breath. “I’m pregnant.”

Geri nodded slowly. “Okay. I’m guessing that has a little something to do with the tears earlier?”

Stella shrugged. “Probably. It’s also just…been a day.”

“Right. Okay.” Geri straightened up and checked behind Stella. “Does your father know?”

She shook her head. “No, just August. He was there when I took the pregnancy tests.”

“Okay. I’m guessing you haven’t seen a doctor about it either.”

“I…I thought I’d have to tell Dad first….” Should she have already seen a doctor? Was she already messing it all up?

“Yeah, no, that was probably smart. It’d probably be weird to schedule one without telling him what was going on.” Geri smiled reassuringly. “So…. Have you thought at all about what you want to do with the baby? It’d probably be a good idea to get that down before you get a bunch of opinions from your family.”

Stella shook her head. “I’ve thought about it. I just… I don’t know what I want. I know the smart thing to do would be to… to give the baby up up. Let an adult with more money and life experience than me take care of them and give myself time to grow up more. I just…. I’m not sure if that’s what I want. And what about Trevor? I mean, this is his kid too….”

“It’s a lot to think about,” Geri agreed. “But, for what it’s worth, you don’t necessarily have to give them up. You have a lot of adults around you who would happily take care of your baby and still let you be part of their life.”

Stella hadn’t even thought about that. “I… I’ll think about it.”

“You do that.” Geri squeezed her arm reassuringly. “And whenever you’re ready to tell your dad and everyone… Just let me know. I’ll be your backup.”

Stella smiled. “Thanks, Aunt Geri. I have a feeling I’m gonna need it.”

“You definitely will. But it’ll be okay.” Geri hugged her tight and pat her back. “Now go get some sleep. You’ll need it for tomorrow.”

“‘Mkay.” Stella yawned and crawled over to where August was already sound asleep.

—-----

The next morning, after breakfast, the four of them headed out- with a few extra guests.

“I still can’t believe I went back for this thing,” Dad muttered, holding the llama’s lead.

“Aw, you’re such a good dad.” Geri laughed.

“Hey, at least we got a cute baby out of it,” August said, holding the newborn in his lap as they rode.

Stella couldn’t stop smiling. “The family’s all together. As it should be.”

It only got better when they got back to the ranch and found out they would be allowed to keep the llamas, which were apparently alpacas, in a new stable Gramps built for them.

She helped get the family settled in. As she fed the baby grass from her hand, something clicked in her heart.

She was going to keep this baby.

Maybe she wasn’t fully ready to be a mom. Maybe she didn’t completely understand what she was signing up for in keeping them. But she knew she wanted to do the right thing; she wanted to keep her family together. It wasn’t going to be easy. There were going to be a lot of people telling her to make a different, more “responsible” choice.

But she was going to do this. She knew she could. She had August and Aunt Geri on her side. And the rest of them would come around. Eventually. They had to, right?

—-----

Even though Stella had made a decision on what she wanted with the baby, she still didn’t know how to tell the family. August was right; she shouldn’t wait too long. And she knew she’d have Aunt Geri’s support when she did. She was just…nervous.

What if they didn’t come around after the initial freakout. What if Dad tried to force her to give up the baby? What if they made her do some religious counseling? What if they never saw her as an adult after this?

What if she ended up alone in all this?

It was enough to keep her quiet during the day and up late during the night.

But something had to give eventually.

That something was a horrible bout of nausea that had Stella out of bed and bolting down the hall at 3 in the morning. She barely made it to the toilet in time to throw up her guts there. As she hugged the toilet, it didn’t take long for much heavier steps to follow her.

“Oh, Stella….” She felt her dad’s rough hands pulling her hair back. “Easy, easy, it’s okay,” he soothed, rubbing her back.

She groaned and sat back against him, taking a moment of comfort.

“Do you feel okay?” he asked gently. “I mean, besides the puking. You got a fever or anything?”

She shook her head, racking her brain for a non-pregnancy explanation. “I think I just ate something bad,” she muttered.

“Yeah, alright.”

Stella groaned as another wave of nausea hit and she bent over the toilet again. “Why won’t it stop?” she whined.

“I know, babygirl. I’m sorry. I’ll get you some medicine and you can stay home and rest today, okay?”

She nodded meekly, knowing it wasn’t that simple. She made a mental note to text Aunt Geri later. With the morning sickness starting, she wouldn’t be able to hide for much longer.

She was going to have to break the news to everyone, finally.

#febuwhump #walker #walker fic #au #pregnancy #my writing #my fic

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mchalowitz · 6 months

Text

the woman is the king, part 9

summary: a throughline of the matriarchal scullys; be they ethereal, sharp-witted, and ill-omened.

part 1: melissa / part 2: dana / part 3: emily / part 4: scully / part 5: samantha (the interlude) / part 6: them / part 7: maggie / part 8: maggie, part 2

part 9: maggie, part 3

read on ao3

@today-in-fic

----

A scenic walking trail and two pairs of thrift store hiking boots blossoms into their first mutual hobby. Scully sees the benefit of a daily exercise regimen. She still acknowledges the possibility she just appreciates his display of athleticism in cut-off running shorts.

Mulder breaks into a vigorous run with her on his back. She squeals his name, tightening her grip around his neck. A scraped-up knee may be an indication of her skill level; she encircles his waist with her uninjured leg.

While Mulder unlocks the door, Scully rests her cheek between his shoulder blades, and allows him to deposit her on the kitchen counter. It is nothing more than a completely superficial surface scrape; it barely requires a bandage. He still gives it a thorough cleaning with cool water and flashes her small smiles of reassurance.

He dusts his hands together, admiring his work. “My hero,” she praises him. She wraps her arms around his neck to meet his lips. She discovered within three days of their arrival that his earlier jest to defile this place was wholly serious.

She cannot actually complain about his voraciousness. She endured the same unending dry spell he did. While quickly rectified upon reuniting, Scully nor Mulder could deny an ever-present fear of federal agents barging through the door. Not exactly an aid for soul-stirring romance.

“I have things to do, Mulder,” she mumbles between kisses with her hands cupped over his jaw. He grumbles his disbelief that anything else could be so pressing. “We’re almost out of clean clothes...it takes forever to do everything by hand...”

“You’ve been injured,” he purrs. He masterfully tongues a hypersensitive nerve underneath her ear; she melts into the cabinets. His mouth momentarily unoccupied, he continues, “Gotta kiss it. Make it better.”

“Oh, is that so?”

Her intention to play along becomes very clear. He nods at her dreamily and drops to a kneel at her feet. She forgets about her knee instantly.

Scully values knowledge; even what she was never supposed to be privy to. She was always the first of her siblings to know, or care, when they would be moving. What she and Mulder are doing now is actually quite familiar to her. Their continued Washington arrangement reminds her of re-upping.

A few weeks of highly secure recuperation becomes a little over two months. She knows nothing about the owner of the cabin. He possesses an apparent hospitality. If it’s a him, that is.

Her reaction to an empty bed is slightly less volatile; her heart still skips a beat. Mulder is usually making her a morning cup of coffee or stretching for an early walk. Scully hears a distinct combination of typing and whispers that signal a covert appointment. He never includes her; they agree it is best for only one of them to be implicated in something legally grey.

Mulder appears from nowhere. A suspicious, “Hi, honey,” interrupts a bite of buttered toast. Her eyebrows raise during a sip of coffee.

“Hi,” she responds slowly. She sets her mug down; Mulder pulls out a chair to sit. She finds his fidgeting disconcerting. With obviousness, she states, “You’re being weird, Mulder.”

“Listen...” he starts, still shifting uneasily. “Every few years, the feds start poking around in the interconnected groups. My contacts are being targeted with false DEA claims.”

Scully attempts to dispel any thoughts that may send her into a deep, premature sense of despondency. Maybe there’s hope. Her “there’s no drug activity here” lacks confidence. Mulder’s ballpark figure gives them three days to relocate.

“Oh, Mulder,” she sighs.

Their sense of normalcy was bound to implode eventually. She and Mulder were never meant to stay here. An inability to put down roots feels equally familiar and unfair.

Mulder leans forward and outstretches his arm across the table, laying his hand over hers. The silence lasts for ages.

All of their worldly goods are packed by the early evening. Scully attempts to categorize their possessions with careful organization; Mulder’s haphazard stuffing of items into their bags illustrates a race against the clock he refuses to fully acknowledge. She stills his hand with hers.

“It’ll only be two weeks,” Mulder promises, returning from lost thoughts. Harder timelines come with their next destination in central California. He continues, “Then we can reevaluate.”

She tries to camouflage the shattering of her fragile laxity at the possibility of a brush with a federal agency. Mulder’s concern lies with their relocation. He sees handling investigators as a non-issue. She reminds him, “We wouldn’t be able to come back here.”

“Somewhere similar.”

Scully answers with a squeeze to his hand and a small smile; she cannot fully muster a verbal vote of confidence quite yet. She knows Mulder is trying. Their decision not to discuss the grey noticeably weighs on him.

“We could use some sandwiches for the car,” she gently suggests.

“Good thinkin’, Doc,” he agrees.

She regrets volunteering to load the car while Mulder slaps together the remaining contents of the fridge between slices of bread. Scully can spot a government-issued sedan anywhere; it idles at the end of the driveway.

She glances to the open screen door. She has no time to swap before a rumbling engine closes in. Young agents present their badges and assume she owns the property.

“Oh, no, I wish,” Scully responds on a laugh; she prays her lips don’t tremble as she smiles warmly. “My husband rented through a travel agency. It’s our first little getaway since we had our son. I might have our travel agent’s phone number...”

“That won’t be necessary,” the second agent interrupts. “Thank you for your time.”

Her unrelenting nightmares culminate in an exchange that barely lasts two minutes; the cognizance comes in all at once. She wants to throw a God-cursing tantrum, and when she opens her mouth to scream, her lungs will not allow it.

Mulder materializes with car sandwiches and the last of their identifying items. Her hands shake violently as she slams the trunk.

Despite its true inconsequentialism, Scully tells Mulder a tale of abject horror, and has unsure expectations for his reaction. He steps forward, and lifts his hands to hold her face, and uses his fingers to brush her hair behind her ears. He speaks with unfamiliar firmness, “It was all true, Scully.”

Instantly dumbfounded by the lack of stress-induced incompetence and unhinged rage, Scully sees Mulder’s attempt to persuade her toward a grey half-truth. If she can convince herself to believe it, then it is true.

She watches him through an upturned gaze and wonders what he had to believe to survive on his own. His protectiveness of her often blinds his outward actionability. He decides to make some calls.

Somewhere near the border between Washington and Oregon, her state of excitement drops, and it knocks her out cold. Unconsciousness masks her ability to speculate on their final destination. She dreams of freedom.

Mulder is slurping the remnants of a gas station soda when she awakes; the straw looks mangled and cracked when he sets it in the cupholder. His head snaps toward her when she steals the cup, removing the lid and chugging the remaining liquid.

“It’s not diet,” he informs her with a twinge of guilt. A burst of real sugar gives her an oddly good feeling on her dry throat and she shakes her with a lack of concern. She deduces his mood is completely removed from depriving her of aspartame.

“What’s wrong?” Aside from everything, she thinks.

With a few beats of silence, he shifts out of gear in the parking lot of a little roadside diner. His hands flop into his lap. “I haven’t been telling you the truth,” he admits.

More often, Scully’s mind will catastrophize in a comparatively normal way. She briefly thinks he is cheating; which is completely improbable when they spend every moment together. Plus, it’s Mulder.

Her mouth opens to respond, but he cuts her off with, “I think you just need to see,” and unbuckles his seatbelt. She follows him out of the car and eyes him skeptically as he holds the door for her. She feels his presence at her back; her eyes scan the room.

And in a far-corner booth, hands folded as if in prayer, is her mother.

#x files #xf fic #msr #fox mulder #dana scully #i realize i haven't added anything to this in a year #and what a year it's BEEN #but i'm inspired to pick up writing again

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apersonwholikeslotus · 1 year

Note

What about Jack and Alfred's relationship? Also, I really like your account :D

OKAY BUT LIKE; Jack was obviously born after Alfred had left. He was William's rebound kid like "oh well! Guess that one didn't work out might as well have another!" but like, a lot more bitter than I can sound through text. Y'know and then Will proceeded to not raise said rebound kid.

That's where Jack's resentment to Alfred starts. Because 'I only exist cause he isn't here'; then there is the William constantly praising Alfred despite acting like he hates him. So then poor Jack is even more confused because??? Do you want me to be nothing like him, or do you want me to be just like him??? or?????

Meanwhile; on the other side of the ocean Alfred is only vaguely aware of Jack's existence, like they don't have a relationship and any semblance of something Jack thinks is a relationship is one-sided on his part.

anyway, their relationship finally starts when Alfred sends Jack (who's probably like 8 btp) a Christmas present. Like out of nowhere, and Matt or Dylan or idk who is like "You need to send him a thank you letter". Jack proceeds to take two months to write this thing because friends, I've never spoken to him before. But eventually its sent. and Alfred decides instead of just letting it be? to send one back? and for like a solid year all of these letters are just 'thank you' 'it's not problem' 'well you took the time to send it' 'it really didn't take that much of an effort I'm just happy you like it' cause neither of them know what to say to each other?????

it takes awhile but eventually they get to other topics, just random things here and there. The letters are consistent but they are something; Jack goes from not liking/being indifferent about Al, to idk, thinking he's pretty cool? Like? He told dad to fuck off and got away with it??? what???? Alfred starts to think Jack is pretty cool too, like bro this kid is possibly the most metal ten yr old known to man?? And he gives dear ol' dad 2.3 heart attacks a day, which is super funny to Al. All good things must come to an end though, and at some point the letter pitter out. I'm thinking like sometime during the Spanish-American war, cause Al came out a super power and in a dick move promptly forgot about little old Jack. It was a two sided thing though, Jack became self-governing and Lord Father wasn't happy about it and basically kicked him out at the age of 13-ish; so he had bigger things to worry about.

Alfred showed back up during WW1 but not really long enough for them to do anything but acknowledge each other before Alfred was back to being an introvert.

WW2 rolls around, the US joins the war and Alfred shows up (begrudgingly) to help Jack and Liam, who are in my hc about 16 and 12. England was very worried about them. Now, Jack is angry about stuff, and he's so worried about keeping Liam safe, and I haven't talked to Mattie or dad or uncle Dylan or Uncle Angus in weeks are they okay???? So despite the fact that for at the very least a few months they're together 24/7 they don't really bond; Jack is stuck between "I need to protect Liam" and "I don't know what I'm doing, I can't protect myself much less someone else" that he just ends up being mad and stubborn while Alfred who's instincts have already added these two children to his Protect At All Costs list is just confused because??? I'm just trying to keep you two safe why do you hate me???

eventually the war ends (thank god); now Liam during the war just added Alfred to his list of People To Cling To Randomly. Alfred was at the bottom of the list albeit, but he was on it. Jack however just got wary of Alfred. He was trustworthy sure, but, this whole thing was technically his first impression of Alfred. and in the middle of a war is not the best time to get a first impression.

by the time the mid-fifties rolled around Alfred in-between stare offs with Ivan decided it was time to actually spend time with his younger two siblings. and this my friends, is when Alfred and Jack finally became the crackhead duo they are; it's not perfect it's really not. But they do get along pretty well, they get in the stupidest arguments like how to make the best pb&j or who Matthieu likes more. Jack rambles about animals for 45 min straight while Alfred listens intently then Alfred rambles about space for 45 min straight while Jack listens intently. It's the only time either of them can sit still that long. combined they give dear ol' dad 4.6 heart attacks a day. There will always be the age gap obviously, and there'll always be the over-arching problem of William and his favoritism. but idk, I think they'll be ok.

#this is so long #and very possibly not coherent #but here we go #aph australia #hws australia #aph america #hws america #hetalia #hetalia hc #anglo-family #the crackiest heads #also thank you!!!#I'm so glad you do

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invincible-selfxmade-punk · 6 months

Text

My charger broke last night and I had to save a little battery I had left to wake me up this morning so I didn't post anything.

However the teacher/ parent that got me written up earlier in the week sent me a really hateful email amd.....it was just unbelievable.

Of course we document any kind of bad behavior and I don't believe in sending kids to the office and less it is something super serious like , , , they are threatening me,,,,, okay bad example because I have sent students in the office for that and nothing was done about it.

But usually if I send them to the office it is for something like fighting or tearing up school property like the kid that poured a pint of glue into one of our brand new laptops. Everyday assholery just gets documented.

So next to her sons bad grades I would put a note in there about why he got the bad grade. This was meant to show that instead of working, he was doing things like running around the room, bothering other people, wrestling with the special needs kid etc.

So she accused me of making all of his grades about his behavior and none about his work because (she argued) he is such an excellent student.

It is possible he is an excellent student but I would never know because he only does half-assed work in my class and spends the rest of the time being an absolute nuisance.

But the letter was so mean-spirited and so hateful I got about three sentences in and just sent it to the principal and said "You deal with this I'm not. She already got me written up once and I stand by that what I said was nothing that anyone over the age of 40 years old with that and I at I do not want to communicate with this woman further."

So we will see what happens. All I can think is it's probably more bad news for me.

Two more days until Thanksgiving break. I have no idea if I am going to be going to UIL competition today since I never even met most of the members of my team and only got to coach them in person

once.

Then tomorrow I have to work 13 hours because we have a parent night after school that goes on until 8:00. And then I will be free for a week but I still have 3 hours left on a GT training course and another 2 hours left on some brand new training videos that just popped up.

If I can survive last year I can survive anything and honestly and the grand scheme of things this isn't that bad but oh boy do I feel like I am going through it this month.

Thank you for reading

#teaching #education #us education #elementary #covid generation #teaching rant

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half-tabaxi · 7 months

Text

A stream of consciousness. Not a new realization but I check in on distanced people more than they check in on me. I think I have come up with some ideas to play around with for a new poem! A little stoked because I haven't written one in awhile. Keep accidentally hanging out with dudes who ultimately just want to have sex. The benefit of the doubt hardly ever benefits me. There was one cool dude this past week, I guess. The thing is, when they skirt around their intentions, I kind of get off on getting them to just like. Voice it aloud. At some point during the night, I learn he is moving across the damn ass country soon and take note, considering I want something long-term. Later we start to makeout and it's fun, it's whatever. I like kissing. We break away after a little bit and I suggest that we walk to the corner store. He agrees, slipping in an "after". After what? Answer the question. And he eventually did. I want to fuck you. Surprise. He didn't even finger me. It was fine. See you never. My roommate is home from a 2-month thing. I cleaned the apartment from top to bottom... all of its nooks and crannies... I hope they feel welcomed! Still some stuff I want to hang and touch-up, all easily overlooked though. They are my secrets. Things just need to look lived in now. It's all too.... untouched... even though in actuality I spent the last few hours putting my hands all over everything. Arguably the most I have in a long time. Dusting and placing and rotating. You get it though... the living room needs to be hung out in.... broken in. I'm sure the suitcases have already made the place feel less... sterilized and proper... no longer like a set. The overhead lighting in the kitchen is harsh, always has been... often takes me out of reality! I have an idea to hang these paper pyramid-like string lights that I have had for years and years. Some are beat-up but I think it would add to the space... give us more options... and it just would be cute. Before my shower I removed the stain glass lightbulb, only leaving in two small red ones. Stood there, the water nice and hot. Sat on the tub floor. Closed my eyes. Leaned forward. Listened to the music I chose. Got out, screwed the loose bulb back in. I have an ongoing joke with myself that I will find my missing hard drive in a stupid silly fucking place, coping about it an entire year later. I noticed that I had some board games that were still taped shut from when I moved. Laughed with myself about the possibilities and opened them up. I am still holding out hope but no luck this time! I may knock on my old front door one day. I kind of resent the new owners for buying my home though. And how quick it all was. Like, get fucked, but also can I please have my hard drive? I mean, if it's in there. What I did find was a pile of half-used notepad sheets for a game that hasn't been played in forever. Some of them were drawn on by people I no longer speak to. One had a doodle done by my ex-boyfriend. It's weird to think about how I have lived, like, thirteen different lives. I think I would forgive a lot of people. Or even apologize to them. I also found two 8-in-1 retractable ballpoint pens. So, like, some treasure and a lot of thoughts. I did a little bit of glueing and taping and messing around in my journal. I feel I am doing okay in a very general sense. Trying my best and keeping up. I could do better. Can't we all though? Is that a cop-out? I don't care about money, I don't know, it's just practically all my parents would argue about in front of us. I don't care as long as my shit gets paid on time. But I think I have to shift gears and thought processes because I would like to live a little more comfortably, ultimately concerning myself with it less. Gonna look over my resume. Keep going, keep busy. Try to slim down my closet. Fix my camera. Maybe it did end up working on my last trip. Do this and that. Keep on playing Tears of the Kingdom and text dudes less. There's more passion involved with the former. Used used used. Wondering. Navigating. October is almost here.

#thot log

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dibs4ever · 2 years

Text

Maybe Baby part 3

If there's enough interest I might take all3 parts and make this story a series on Ao3. Of course it'll get a more thorough Grammer cleaning if I do. Let me know if I should

Barbara sat on the edge of the exam table. Dick beside her. In a chair, both of them anxious

Dr. Leslie entered the room, clipboard in hand. Closing the door behind her. “Hello Barbara, Dick.” She nodded towards the Two. “Well the Urine test and your HCG levels from the blood draw confirm you are indeed pregnant, now not that I’m saying I’m not happy for your two...because believe me I am. I know we discussed when you made plans to switch to a more effective birth control a few months ago that you two weren’t going to try for more. I gave you both very distinct instructions on how to stay safe during the time in between birth controls. Does anyone care to explain why we are here?”

She looked between the two who weren’t meeting her eyes

“Anyone?” Leslie asked.....”Hmm okay moving on”

“I’ll bite,” Dick spoke raising a hand

Leslie smiled “Oh yeah?”

Dick sighed “Only cause I want to know for

future reference”

Leslie nodded signaling for him to

continue

Dick sighed “One night Babs and I were finishing up patrol and it was the first time in forever that we had gotten to patrol alone together. We got heated while steaking out a dock for illegal drug shipments”

Leslie smiled

Dick nodded “Anyways long story short after two rounds in a row we were in the mood for one more. But I was out of condoms so I reused the one I was wearing is it possible that it did this?”

Leslie shrugged, “it’s highly possible”

Dick sighed

Barbara giggled “Told ya”

He looked over at her smirking “Hey you’re the one who wanted to keep going.”

Barbara rolled her eyes playfully “You’re the one who has a long-lasting stigma”

He narrowed his eyes at her “And I wonder who’s the cause of that.”

“And you wonder how this happened a second time. I’m still here guys.”

Dick and Barbara looked toward the doctor all the vigilantes trusted “Sorry” they spoke in unison

Leslie nodded “So Umm, I know it wasn’t planned. Therefore I need to ask.” She looked toward Barbara “How do you plan on handling the situation?”

Barbara nodded “I thought it over myself and discussed it with Dick. We are keeping it.”

Leslie smiled “Great. I’m going to do a vaginal ultrasound to determine how far along you are. Even though it sounds like you two have an idea?”

Barbara nodded “If it's the time frame Dick is referring to its 8 weeks....almost 9”

Leslie walked over to the cabinet and began grabbing supplies to perform the ultrasound “Have you told the family?”

Dick shook his head “Waiting till 12 weeks he explained

Leslie nodded “Are you going to announce it to the public?”

Barbara smirked “I don’t know it was kinda fun last time when we all of a sudden said we had a 1-year-old. The paparazzi went crazy with the fact that Bruce Wayne’s son and Commissioner Gordon’s daughter had a toddler nobody knew about”

Dick nodded “So to answer your question. No we are going to just let them figure it out” he grinned.

Barbara smiled “They don’t need to know about our baby. Less they know about our life the better.”

“Couldn’t agree more,” Leslie confirmed

She went to work, getting the supplies she needed and before Barbara knew it she was on her back getting her ultrasound. Dick was looking at the screen anxiously. Barbara fidgeted as Leslie moved the wand around a little more.

Dick looked down at her “You okay?”

She nodded “Yeah I’m good.”

He smiled leaning down and kissing her temple “There it is!” Leslie announced

Dick looked up and grinned “It looks like a little fish!”

Leslie chuckled “It does, doesn’t it? You’re right Barbara, you are about 9 weeks along. For now.” She moved the wand around more “I’m going to put you at 8 weeks 4 days.” She typed into the computer.

Barbara looked over at Dick who was looking at the screen in awe. She chuckled lightly

“That’s right, he hasn’t seen one before. He was ‘dead’ with your son.” Leslie stated

This caused Dick to turn “Yeah not something I like to talk about. Babs, you aren’t amazed by this? This is what’s inside of you right now! Our baby. Look at its little head.” He smiled pointing at the screen Leslie had paused for them to admire.

Barbara laughed lightly and turned to Leslie “You have any of my first ultrasounds with my son on file?”

Leslie nodded “I do, I keep everyone’s records just in case. Let me save this “ she walked over to the computer saving the image of their new baby. Did some typing and clicking then pull up a new image to show Dick?

His eyes widened “Is that-“ he stepped closer to the screen

Barbara nodded “Yeah that was the first time I saw Nathan.”

Dick examined the image “There are arms, legs...everything! The one inside you now looks like I little fish with a head this....this looks like a full-on baby. “ he turned to look back at the woman “How far along were you?”

Barbara shrugged “12 weeks almost 13”

Leslie tilted her head “Basically 13. It was 12 weeks 5 days to be exact, okay you two that wraps up this appointment I’ll get you all situated for the next one. I know you're busy so we will try to get you out of here.” She wavered

Dick was driving, Barbara in the passenger seat holding the paperwork and images Leslie had given them

Dick had been quiet. Barbara knew there was something wrong.

“Hey, what’s up?” She grabbed his hand on the center council and squeezed it gently

Dick looked over at her. Then back at the road “I just-13 weeks Babs? You didn’t know Til 13 weeks!”

Barbara furrowed her eyebrows “Sorry? I mean Nate’s fine. I was so wrapped up in-“

Dick cut her off “I wasn’t bashing you, babe, I know it was my fault.”

Barbara sighed “Honey, it wasn’t your fault. I should’ve noticed my body.”

Dick shook his head “If I had told you I was faking my death you wouldn’t have been so crushed about thinking I was and overcome with grief.”

Barbara smiled lightly “That boy of ours got me to live again though.”

He smiled, then sighed “I was astonished to see the baby on the screen today and I was prepared for it. You.....you went in for a check-up, found out you were pregnant then saw an almost fully formed baby on the screen that you didn’t even know was inside you. And you were alone through it all.”

Barbara smiled “He wasn’t anywhere near fully grown. But yes it was a shock, to say the least.”

Dick shrugged “Just-must’ve been so scary. Alone.....thinking I was dead. Over 3 months pregnant with my child. Conflicted about what to do and what was right. And you were alone and sad and scared and it was all my-“

Barbara stopped him, he always start repeating himself and rambling when he was truly getting worked up “Dick. It’s in the past, it all turned out okay and everything is good. Alright?”

He looked toward her and nodded

Barbara rested a hand on her still flat belly “And now. We are having a second baby. How are you feeling?”

He smiled “Honestly? Amazing. I mean I feel a little guilty I’m going to be here for every step of this child’s development and I wasn’t with Nate. Whether he knows I was or not-“

Barbara smiled “He adores you, and has no idea you didn’t know he existed till he was 6 weeks old. Who’s the one he runs to anytime he’s scared?”

Dick chuckled “Me. He was pretty cute the other day when he found a leaf in his room and thought Poison Ivy was in his closet Huh?”

Barbara smiled “Yeah, you were pretty cute checking under his bed and in the closet telling him that if you found her you were going to call Nightwing.”

Dick rolled his eyes “Yeah then the little squirt had the nerve to say “No Daddy call Green Arrow”

Barbara laughed “Just wait, till he finds out his Dad is Nightwing. You’ll become his favorite I’m sure.”

Dick grinned “It’s all good I have another one on the way and this one I will brainwash for Nightwing to be his favorite hero”

Barbara grinned “Oh HIS, and what if it’s her?”

Dick smirked “Well if that becomes the case then I guess it’ll be Batgirl. She is my favorite after all.” He pulled into the garage of their home, turned the car off, and turned toward his wife.

“That’s funny cause Nightwing is mine” she smirked leaning forward

Dick grinned leaning closer to her. Their foreheads now touching “Is that so Mrs.Grayson?”

Barbara nodded “Undoubtedly Mr.Grayson.” She leaned forward their lips meeting in a sweet kiss.

#dickbabs #barbara gordon #dick grayson #batfam headcanons

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denimbex1986 · 8 months

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'Both 28 Days Later and 28 Weeks Later have well-rounded conclusions but leave a few lingering questions that 28 Years Later can finally answer. The first installment of the Danny Boyle franchise, 28 Days Later, presents a white-knuckling and emotionally stirring post-apocalyptic drama that, unlike most other zombie movies, emphasizes less on action and more on character development. Since its primary focus was on its four main characters and their journey through a pandemic-torn London, the movie left several questions surrounding its science fiction aspects unanswered.

28 Weeks Later trod a similar path by adding more nuances to the franchise's world-building but not offering answers to many questions surrounding character fates and the virus outbreak's science. Now that 28 Years Later is finally becoming a possibility, the third installment can give answers to everything the first two movies missed out on. On that premise, here is a rundown of the biggest questions 28 Years Later might finally answer about the Danny Boyle franchise.

10. What Happened To Jim, Selena & Hannah After 28 Days Later?

Jim, Selena, and Hannah were seemingly rescued in 28 Days Later's ending. However, instead of revealing what happened to them after the rescue, 28 Weeks Later revolved around a whole new roster, shrouding Jim, Selena, and Hannah's fate in mystery. 28 Days Later established that in the face of grave danger from the spreading virus, many humans, including military personnel, were becoming immoral monsters, far more dangerous than the central zombies. Owing to this, 28 Days Later's ending was not exactly a happy ending. Hopefully, 28 Years Later will offer more answers on where the three characters ended up and lived the rest of their lives in their bleak world.

9. Did Scientists Find A Cure After 28 Weeks Later?

In the first movie, only a few weeks had passed since the inception of the virus outbreak, making it impossible for humans to come up with a cure. 28 Weeks Later's storyline, too, unfolded only a little over six months after the first movie's timeline, which was again too soon for scientists to discover vaccines for the Rage virus. Considering how 28 Years Later's storyline will ensue nearly three decades after the first movie, it offers a realistic time gap for scientists to develop a cure. Perhaps, the third part of the franchise could take this as a prompt and depict a socio-political drama where even finding the cure for the virus does not end societal divisions, which, in turn, further spreads the virus.

8. What Happened To The Rest Of The World?

28 Days Later and 28 Weeks Later left audiences wondering what happened to the rest of the world since both films confined their narratives to London and its outskirts. 28 Years Later could expand the franchise's vision by highlighting how the Rage virus affected other parts of the world. It does not have to be a globe-trotting adventure like World War Z but can still drop a few hints to clarify whether other parts of the world were equally devastated by the virus' impact or somehow managed to shut themselves before it could reach them. It would make sense for other cities and nations to be far less wretched since the virus is not air-borne.

7. Can The 28 Days Later Franchise Recover After The 2007 Sequel Failed?

28 Days Later's 2007 sequel, 28 Weeks Later, is a decent film in its own right. However, since it is a sequel to Danny Boyle and Alex Garland's magnum opus, it is hard not to compare it with its predecessor and conclude that it is just not as good. While 28 Days Later is often touted as one of the most innovative horror movies of all time, 28 Weeks Later ranks among the regular share of zombie action thrillers. The second film's inability to match the high standards of the first begs an intriguing question: Will 28 Years Later rectify the franchise damage done by the second?

6. Did The Infected Evolve After 28 Weeks Later?

Both 28 Days Later and 28 Weeks Later did not get the opportunity to explore the long-term consequences of the virus outbreak. With its massive time jump, 28 Years Later can explore how the virus and the people it infects have evolved and adapted over time. These adaptations could either make them more erratic and dangerous, forcing humans to take desperate measures to protect themselves. Or, their evolutions could make them less potent, leaving room for the movie to explore how surviving humans exploit them and their weaknesses.

5. Will The Franchise Finally Justify 28 Days Later's Happy Ending?

28 Days Later had an alternate ending, where Jim fulfilled his purpose of protecting Selena and Hannah and ultimately succumbed to his injuries. In the alternate ending's closing scene, only Selena and Hannah survived and were ultimately rescued by a military jet. This ending seemed to be a better fit for 28 Days Later because it did not give Jim a forced plot armor and realistically portrayed how no one is safe in its dark zombie-infested world. Unfortunately, the alternate ending did not make it to the final cut and was replaced with a happy ending. 28 Years Later could finally justify the first movie's ending change by closing Jim's arc with his death, but will it?

4. Is There A Deeper Meaning To The Number 28?

Since 28 days (or four weeks) is a long enough period for a society to collapse after a gruesome virus outbreak, the first movie's title makes sense. However, the fact that the film could have also settled for 30 or any other random number of days close to 28 leaves room for speculation surrounding this creative decision. Maybe 28 Years Later could finally explain the deeper symbolism behind the franchise's title because if it does not, it would be safe to assume that the title choice was either random or had something to do with its aesthetic appeal.

3. Why Didn't The "Zombies" Die Of Dehydration?

Although the infected in the 28 Days Later franchise are commonly referred to as zombies, they are not exactly the living dead. Instead, they are just humans who lost their minds to uncontrollable rage and aggression after getting infected by the virus. Since they need food and water like regular humans to stay alive, how is it that most of them do not die before the first 28 days? Even if the first two movies are given the benefit of the doubt, 28 Years Later will have to finally give a logical reason for how the zombies remain alive three decades after the virus outbreak.

2. Can 28 Years Later Justify The Franchise's Revival After So Long?

From a timeline standpoint, it makes sense that 28 Years Later is the next installment in the franchise since 28 Days Later premiered over two decades ago. However, to justify the franchise's revival, 28 Years Later will have to be as compelling with its storytelling as the first movie. Since 28 Days Later's zombie-centric terrors also served as a relevant allegory for the chaos that ensued with the inception of a new century, 28 Years Later must adopt other contemporary themes that resonate with current times. More than anything else, the film must also continue 28 Days Later's narrative instead of alienating audiences with a whole new storyline featuring unfamiliar characters.

1. Will 28 Years Later End The Franchise (Or Begin A New One?)

Whether 28 Years Later will begin a new franchise will primarily depend on its commercial returns. While a sequel titled 28 Decades Later would be ridiculous for obvious reasons, the franchise does have the potential to grow into spin-offs and prequels like 28 Months Later that could either explore other timelines after the outbreak or highlight the journeys of newer characters. Regardless of how the franchise ends up branching out in the future, its fate will ultimately depend on how 28 Years Later performs at the box office and recreates 28 Days Later's success.'

#Danny Boyle #28 Days Later #28 Years Later #Jim #Selena #Hannah #Cillian Murphy #Megan Burns #Naomie Harris #Alex Garland

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twobigears · 1 year

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2023 New Year Goals and Reviews and Stuff

I usually do goal and review posts every year just like everyone else, but if I did this for 2022 I sure can’t find it. Maybe I was too lazy, which would surprise no one.

2022

This felt like a fairly chill year overall, which is probably a good thing.

We did some hiking and camping. As always, we could have done more.

Chandra made good progress in her iliospoas rehab that started at the end of 2021 (def a reason we didn’t hike as much, especially in the first half of the year). She is cautiously returning to agility and we’ll see how that goes.

Chandra did some more obedience training and also made good progress there. We didn’t trial other than some at-home WRCL runs.

Blizzard really picked up her agility trialing! She had her first full year of trialing after a slow start largely due to covid.

Between virtual runs and real trials, Blizzard made her way up to Masters in USDAA and Level 5 in CPE. She earned her MPD (Masters level title in USDAA) and is about halfway to her PDCH (championship title)

I finished 3/4 of my schooling for my GIS certificate and transition away from dog training to a new career. There is still a lot of anxiety going on with that, but the mental relief of getting away from agility-as-a-job has been soooo worth it.

I put more effort into self-improvement mentally and physically! After years of yo-yoing and steadily creeping weight gain, I revamped habits, made better choices, and lost about 25lbs. I admit this came after hitting a mental low point (and high weight point) early in the year when I was sitting in a hotel room eating grocery store chocolate cake with my fingers because I ‘needed’ it. The cake wasn’t even that good.

I also reined in my internet and social media habits, especially Facebook as recently mentioned. But also things like not scrolling my phone in bed at night, and not checking it first thing in the morning either. I think a lot of people these days have some sort of social media addiction, or at least way too much there, and Facebook was mine. For a long time I knew how bad it was making me feel for a hundred different reasons, but it was still a struggle to quit or cut back. I finally managed it in the last couple months of 2022 and I really do feel soooo much better just ignoring my friends feed and going on primarily to check some hobby groups. It is so much easier to spend less than 5-10 minutes a day there versus the hours I used to spend. Unfortunately I’ve kind of replaced the FB addiction with a Reddit addiction, which is something to work on in 2023....

I got myself spayed and off of hormonal birth control! It’s only been about five weeks but I can already feel the mental benefits and I’m so glad I did it. Only regret is that I didn’t do it sooner. I look forward to seeing how my brain and body continue to change and hopefully for the better. HBC is great for so many reasons (esp the No Babies part, so I have no regrets for that), but it’s also got shitty baggage.

Seems like a lot of 2022 was about me, which was probably more than a little overdue. As they say, put on your own oxygen mask before helping others. ~self care~ and all that!

What’s up for 2023?

Continue monitoring Chandra’s rehab and see how it goes and how she does with some agility again. I have a pipe dream goal of finishing her PDCH (she needs 8 Qs, even less than Blizzard) but I don’t want to be selfish about it. So we’ll see.

Obedience...idk. We’ll keep doing some training but at this point I’m not sure about trialing. The obedience community really does it make hard to love. Maybe later on I’ll feel interested again. I don’t want to regret not doing it, like I regret not finishing Ryker’s CD before he died.

Blizzard, I would love to finish her PDCH! It might be tough to do given the lack of USDAA trials here but I think it is still a possibility.

At this point I’ve put thoughts of Next Dog on hold for a while again. I’m currently enjoying the two dog life, backing away from dog sports again, and doing more non-dog things (even though a lot of it still involves them anyway, like hiking and camping). Plus with us likely moving, me hopefully getting a new job, I think it’s good to just not add another dog to the mix until all that has settled. I won’t say Next Dog is totally out of the question for 2023, but right now it’s unlikely and not something I’m planning to actively pursue.

At some point this year we’re planning to move to Minnesota. No specific timeline yet, but probably summer-ish. It will be incredibly sad to leave Colorado...

I’ll finish school this spring, hopefully find a real adult job in that field (yay..) and not have this schooling be for nothing.

Continue reinforcing and improving my habits for mental and physical health. I’ve been considering getting into bouldering for something different in the physical activity realm, so I’ll probably check that out. Plus the usual hiking and camping. Gotta get out and see some places before we leave! Then have new places to check out when we move.

Hmmm yeah I think that’s it so far. 😂

#long post is long #goals

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