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#it's been long enough this won't clutter anyone's shit up right
clarenecessities · 1 month
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i really am fucking poisoned. i was looking at the etymology of izutsumi's name and i checked her codename first, right, Asebi, aka the Japanese pieris/andromeda and like all I can think is damn that was Justine Dantzer's working name for the character who would one day be She-Ra. that's crazy
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steddieas-shegoes · 3 months
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read my lips
for @steddielovemonth prompt 'love is staring at his lips when he talks'
rated m | 1,799 words | cw: suggestive language, implied sexual content | tags: mutual pining, getting together, first kiss, platonic stobin
👄👄👄👄👄👄👄👄👄👄👄👄👄👄
"Steve? Earth to Steve." Robin waved her hand in front of his face, successfully pulling him out of the daydream he'd been in for who knows how long. "He walked away nearly two minutes ago. You gotta get your shit together, man."
Steve looked around, trying to find where Eddie went. He'd been talking to them both about a show his band was invited to perform in a few towns over in a couple weeks. Steve was listening to him go on about trying to buy a set of special edition picks at the record shop they'd be performing in when he got distracted by the way Eddie's lips kept smirking around his words.
The scarring along his cheek made his smile more crooked than it was before the bats, and Steve couldn't stop staring.
Not for the reasons strangers on the street would, not even in the way that Dustin or Wayne sometimes looked at him, like they were still upset at the way the world turned against Eddie.
No, this was entirely because every time Steve started to watch Eddie talk, he got distracted thinking about those lips on his. This time it was way less work appropriate.
He turned to Robin and groaned.
"God, this is bad."
"You don't say." Robin set a stack of tapes on the counter next to Steve. "All these still need to be checked in. Then you can go get distracted by thoughts of Eddie's lips on your neck or whatever."
"If only it had been my neck," Steve mumbled as Robin started humming loud enough to drown him out.
"Stevie, you work too hard," Eddie's voice said from right behind him only a minute later. "You should take a break."
"I just had my lunch 30 minutes ago. I can't take another break," Steve refused to make eye contact, refused to get captured by that sinful smile.
Eddie's hand landed on his shoulder. "Aren't you the one in charge right now?"
"You think I'm over Robin?"
"I think you think you're over Robin. And that should be enough. Just sneak away. She won't even notice. Look, she's yelling at a kid in the corner," Eddie poked him to get him to turn around and look. "Poor kid probably didn't think anyone who worked here cared if he snuck into the R section."
Steve finally turned around and let out a snort. "That's the third time that kid's tried to get back there in a week. He's just an idiot."
"Well...she's distracted. There's no other customers. Take a break!" Eddie was grinning at him and Steve was already under his spell.
"Fine, but only a few minutes. She'll be pissed if I leave her to do all the rewinding and shelving," Steve agreed because he had to.
Because Eddie was looking at him like he was up to something and he wanted Steve to be up to something with him. Because he'd do anything that made Eddie's crooked smile bigger, anything to hear him let out that giggle he tried to hide when he was being mischievous.
Eddie tugged on his arm and pulled him out from behind the counter, holding a finger to his lips to shush him when he started to tell him to stop.
He led him to the back office, which was usually locked if Keith wasn't in, but had been left unlocked the last two shifts because Robin was in charge of closing out the registers.
"I know for a fact you shouldn't be in here. I'm barely even allowed in here," Steve whispered.
"No one will know," Eddie said as he sat on the edge of the cluttered desk. "It's not like Family Video is stashing away government secrets."
"I said the same thing about Scoops Ahoy and then got tortured by Russians, so I'd watch what you say."
Eddie's smile dropped for a moment.
Steve had never gone into details and Robin had just shrugged it off when Eddie asked her about it. She said she was grateful she had Steve through it all and that was that.
"Do you suspect Russians might be hiding under Family Video?" Eddie eventually asked. "If so, I think we should head out. I'll get our coats."
Steve shook his head. "Nah. Think the Russians got the hell out of Hawkins after Starcourt."
"Good. Wouldn't wanna have to deal with Russian torture trauma on top of all the bats and being stuck in the Upside Down for days trauma," Eddie snorted. "So, what're you doin' after work today?"
"Uh." Steve admittedly didn't hear most of what Eddie said. He was too busy watching his lips form around words. "Hm?"
Eddie's smile fell. "I asked what you're doing after work. Are you okay? You seem kinda out of it today."
"Yep, I'm fine. Might just be getting a migraine or something." Steve looked down at the floor to try to concentrate. "I'm probably just gonna heat up some leftovers from movie night last night and shower and go to bed."
"You want company?" Eddie asked.
Steve felt his heart stop. "In the shower?"
He looked up at Eddie, that perfect smile growing on his face.
"I meant for dinner or just to hang out, but if you need help in the shower, I could probably arrange that," Eddie was teasing. He was kidding. He had to be. Right?
“I’m…I don’t-“
“Don’t hurt yourself, Stevie,” Eddie laughed. “Offer’s there if you want it.”
Steve was too busy staring at Eddie’s tongue licking his bottom lip, imagining that tongue licking along his bottom lip.
“Jesus Christ,” Eddie whispered.
“Hm?”
“You know, I started wearing chapstick and waited for you to finally give in.” Eddie’s lip quirked up. “But you haven’t done anything except stare. You gonna do something?”
“Do what?” Steve was clueless as to what he was talking about.
“You gonna see if they taste as good as they look?”
“I’m not sure what you mean.”
“Kiss me, Harrington. You gonna do it or not?” Eddie sighed.
“I-“
“It’s alright. Been waiting for weeks now. You wanna?” Eddie didn’t move from the desk. “Not sure they’re gonna be as great as you seem to be picturing every time I talk, but hopefully they aren’t a complete disappointment.”
Steve kinda figured he should go ahead and kiss him before he started to get lost in his own world again.
He stepped up to Eddie, watching as his face shifted from amused to anticipatory. Steve’s hand rested on Eddie’s knee, mostly to help keep his balance.
He was feeling a little lightheaded with the recent development.
“You really want me to kiss you?” Steve asked as he leaned in, resting his forehead against Eddie’s.
“Yeah, I really do.”
Steve watched his lips the entire time, enamored with the way every part of his mouth enunciated every word. Everything felt important when Eddie said it.
He tasted and felt better than he looked, especially when his hands came up to cup the sides of Steve’s neck, fingers scratching at the roots of his long hair.
Steve whined into his mouth, sinking against him as Eddie took control and deepened the kiss.
“You’re both lucky I’m willing to pretend that I’m not seeing what I’m seeing and that I’m willing to close this door and leave you alone for ten minutes. Mostly because I was so tired of Steve losing every remaining brain cell anytime Eddie talked.” Robin’s voice filtered through the small office, causing Steve and Eddie to pull apart quickly, both wiping at their mouths. “Ten minutes. Not a second more. Pants stay on. Got it?”
“Got it,” Eddie agreed.
“And hands stay out of pants!” Robin said as she closed the door.
“Dammit,” Eddie sighed.
“Ten minutes is long enough to make out,” Steve tried to suggest, leaning in to kiss him again.
“Ten minutes is long enough for a lot of things. Tell me where you want my lips.”
It would be rude teasing from anyone else, but from Eddie, it just made Steve feel seen.
“Anywhere. Everywhere. Wherever you want them,” Steve gasped out, still feeling like he might be dreaming.
“So you’d be okay with them…here?” Eddie whispered against his neck, soft presses of his lips against his skin. “Or here?” Steve’s shirt was pulled to the side for Eddie to suck a bruise into the crook of his neck. “Or maybe here?” Eddie’s hand pressed against his half-hard cock on his jeans. “Oh, sweetheart. Had no idea you’d be so ready for me.”
“Yes, you did,” Steve argued.
“You’re right. But it’s still nice to see and feel. Maybe I could taste?” Eddie asked as his hand wandered along his waist line.
“N-now?” Steve stuttered out.
“I have-“ Eddie checked his watch. “About eight minutes. I could get you off.”
“With your mouth?”
“Well, yeah. We can’t make a mess, can we? This is your place of employment, Stevie. And it’s a bitch getting cum out of a carpet like this.”
“You know from experience?”
Eddie dropped to his knees. "I made an educated guess. So. Mouth. Yes or no?"
"Yes," Steve replied, unbuttoning his own pants. "Jesus, yes."
Eddie's mouth was even better than Steve's imagination gave him credit for. They only need three of the minutes they had for Steve to finish, and another two minutes of Steve's hand working Eddie over for him to finish, too.
"You could've said something sooner," Eddie said as he tried to fix his hair. "Or just kissed me one of those times you were trying to stare through my lips."
"I didn't think I was being that obvious before today," Steve said as he tucked his shirt back into his pants and slid his vest back on.
"Sweetheart, you've been obvious since day one. I've just been waiting for you to realize that you needed to make a move," Eddie crowded him against the desk, hands on his hips and a playful smile on his face.
Steve watched his lips the entire time.
"Like that," Eddie continued, raising a finger to trace along Steve's lips. "You watch them when you don't even realize you are."
"Sorry."
"Don't apologize, Stevie. Love it," Eddie kissed the corner of his mouth before stepping back. "You better get back before Robin comes in here and glares at us until we catch on fire or something."
"You comin' over after I get off?"
"You just got off," Eddie joked. "But yes. As long as I can actually help you in the shower."
"Help me? Or distract me?"
"It can be both!" Eddie opened the door and held it for Steve to go through. "I'll take care of you."
Steve smiled to himself as he walked away. "I'm sure you will."
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ariaste · 10 months
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Hello hello! If it’s all right with you, I would like to vent for a moment: Back in the day, I used to be really into BBC Sherlock. I know it was bad, but it was “Be Gay (solve) Crimes” and I couldn’t resit. One of my favorite parts of the fandom was reading fan metas. I enjoyed reading your ridiculously long meta! I am not very clever and I enjoy reading people noticing things that I can’t. It’s fun watching people passionately pick up clues and put them together.
I don’t think I’m the only one getting superwholock flashbacks lately. Sherlock also tried an unreliable narrator in S4 and it was an absolute shit show. People thought thought the finale was fake, it was so bad. TBH, the entire show was a dumpster fire that thought it was more clever than it was. Moffat was a good writer for single episodes for DW, but a garbage show runner. And they called us crazy for picking up what they were putting down.
But Good Omens gives me a spark of hope. It is unashamedly queer, fun, drinks its respecting women juice, and, unlike moffatiss, I think Neil and the crew may actually be clever enough to pull something big off. I adore the Discworld series and Sir Terry, and I have faith Neil will to do right by him.
Good Omens is restoring my faith in nerdy queer fiction and reminding me why I love fandom so much. Please keep up the crackhead theories. I love them 💕
Thank you, that's very kind!
(Ended up writing a very long reply about the response to my essay and also about queerness in media. Idk why i am writing such long posts these days SORRY LOL. Anyway I'm putting it all beneath the cut so I can tag it without clogging people's dash or the tag pages)
It does make me sigh a little when I see people scornfully comparing my long essay to The Johnlock Conspiracy or saying that they're having Sherlock flashbacks, because the both the contexts of the shows and the methodology of the theorizing are VERY different. To my mind, a more direct comparison of methodology would be the Gravity Falls fandom's "Stan Has A Secret Twin" theory. Writers and showrunners DO like being sneaky and clever from time to time, and many of them are much better at it than Moffat is.
But whether or not my theory is right or not is... kind of irrelevant to me? I wasn't out to force anyone to agree with me, AND writing it was a really fun way to spend a weekend, AND I'm proud of the work I did and the story I told, AND it felt good to have a satisfying workout at the Brain Gym. So even if I'm proven utterly and completely wrong, I won't feel like I wasted my time. :)
Good Omens is a great show, and I am SO HAPPY to see it (and other shows!) embracing queerness, sharing the fans' enthusiasm for the story, and honoring and respecting the fans' love rather than punishing them for it. As more and more time goes on, I think we're going to see more and more shows like that, because some of the people who grew up reading tumblr discourse are going to be showrunners themselves one day, and they'll have learned serious lessons about what it feels like when the audience is met with love rather than disgust and disdain. In fact, we're ALREADY seeing more shows like that than we had 10 years ago! There is so much canonical queerness on-screen these days that the me of 10-15 years ago is ASTONISHED and feels wealthy beyond counting. Of course, there is so much further to go, but man... when i was a kid, we had to walk uphill in the snow both ways just to see two dudes making sustained emotional eye contact, and we were grateful for it. (Jokes but also.... kind of real tho)
We've seen the exact same thing happen in scifi/fantasy publishing in the last seven or eight years, too! (Went off on a long tangent about Queerness In Media from an insider perspective, continuing below a cut so I don't clutter everyone's dash)
Even as recently as 2013--ten years ago--you might not have even been able to get your book published if it was openly gay. Hell, you might not have been able to get an agent to represent it, even. It would have been labeled "unmarketable" and passed over; if it DID get published, the queerness would have been camouflaged and downplayed and hidden in the marketing as much as possible--you wouldn't have known by looking at the cover that it was queer, you wouldn't have been able to tell by reading the back cover that it was queer. In literally 2016, seven years ago, a few months before I got my first book deal, I remember having a conversation with a friend and being very very worried that if I wrote books as queer as I wanted them to be, I would be "pigeonholed" as "ONLY writing Gay Books", that I would be passed over for any of the publisher's marketing budget and publicity efforts, that I would be sidelined and ignored... In 2016, I thought I was facing a choice of writing stories with more "mainstream appeal" OR writing the books I wanted to write and potentially undermining the rest of my career.
That didn't happen, thankfully, because in the next couple years there was this incredible explosion of queer scifi/fantasy. You see, ten to fifteen years ago, a truly stunning percentage of my colleagues -- writers, editors, publicists -- were writing and reading fanfic, and they carried their tastes and story-hungers with them as they grew up and got Real Adult Jobs at publishing companies. And suddenly, as if out of nowhere, a lot of us came of age all at once and there was this absolutely enormous wave of queer SFF that in my opinion has brought us into a new golden age of the genre: The Locked Tomb series by Tamsyn Muir, The Chorus of Dragons series by Jenn Lyons, She Who Became the Sun by Shelley Parker Chan, Ancillary Justice by Ann Leckie, The Tensorate series by Neon Yang, Priory of the Orange Tree by Samantha Shannon, Light from Uncommon Stars by Ryka Aoki, The City in the Middle of the Night by Charlie Jane Anders, the Birdverse books by RB Lemberg, The Traitor Baru Cormorant by Seth Dickenson, The Jasmine Throne by Tasha Suri, Reforged by Seth Haddon, The Sorcerer of the Wildeeps by Kai Ashante Wilson, Ocean's Echo by Everina Maxwell, The Fifth Season by NK Jemisin -- and these only the ones I could remember off the top of my head in 30 seconds, and I have a flavor of ADHD that makes my brain go blank when people ask me to think of specific examples of things! It is harder for me to think of a SFF book published in the last 7 years that ISN'T queer.
And then almost exactly a year ago, my book A Taste of Gold and Iron came out with THIS COVER:
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Which. Is not so much a step forward in openly queer SFF as it is a fucking gauntlet thrown down in challenge. I cannot impress upon you strongly enough how much I would not have gotten this cover 10 years ago, and that's if the book was even accepted for publication in the first place. This cover SCREAMS gay fantasy romance. There is no attempt to hide it or camouflage it. It is advertising exactly what it is, right up front.
I got the absolute privilege and honor of having this cover--and I do consider it an incredible honor--because of the work that all my colleagues put in with their own work. Each queer book that got published wedged the door a little wider for the next one, and then a little wider still for the next one, until finally someone could get their foot in the door and squeeze across the threshold, which opened it a little wider again. So when I look at this image, I don't just see a beautiful cover that I am delighted to have on my books--I see an entire history of slow, steady progress by so many incredible writers who risked damaging their careers just to drag us to a point where a book as gay as this one could get a cover as gay as that one and STILL get the full and enthusiastic support of both the publisher and the audience. And the most incredible honor and the most humbling privilege out of all of this is the fact that the success of this book meant that the door was wedged open another little bit, that I got to contribute in this small way to the efforts of everyone who came before me, so that ones who come after us will find the door flung wide -- or that there's no door left at all to block the way, because we've collectively torn it down.
So yes, @eyona, I think that having your faith restored little by little is a very good thing, and I am delighted that Good Omens is doing that for all of us. And what's even better is that even if Good Omens doesn't play out exactly how we want it to, that's... kind of okay? Because there is always the next one, and at the very very least, Good Omens is wedging the door open further so that the next one can have an easier time of it. We don't have to walk uphill in the snow both ways just to get a moment of emotionally charged eye contact anymore. We don't have to starve anymore, not like we used to back in the bad old days. And that alone is a wonderful thing. :D
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thefanficmonster · 2 years
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Hello! There are real monsters that skillfully hide in human form. And there are true humans who were forcibly given the form of a monster. Karl Heisenberg is definitely one of those people. Could you please write some headcanons for Lord Heisenberg and his lover, who loves him no matter what, is seeing his mutated form for the first time in their life? Thank you very much!
I love your idea darling and you couldn't be more right! We never know someone truly unless we take the time to learn them. Hope you enjoy the headcanons and they capture what you had in mind. 💕
Pairing: Karl Heisenberg x Reader (Gender Neutral) [Resident Evil Village]
Warnings: SPOILERS for Resident Evil Village, Mentions of mutation, human experimentation, Insecurities, Swearing
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, Angsty Romance
- You and Karl hadn't known each other for a long time before he became a part of Miranda's sick tests and experiments
- When he disappeared into thin air, you were rightfully concerned but at the same time thought you weren't important enough to Karl for him to try and reach out before moving or something
- Regardless, you had a hunch that something was terribly wrong but you had no one to tell
- Nobody would've listened to you or done anything
- You couldn't help him
- And you couldn't know that the only thing he could think about during his conscious period under testing was you
- You were constantly on his mind even before that but you never knew
- You could've never guessed how important you had become to the man in the short period of time
- He had never had a connection like that with anyone before
- And he never wanted it severed
- But one look in the mirror following the horrible shit he had undergone was enough to break him and shatter his hopes of ever reuniting with you
- You never stopped hoping, however
- Out of the window in your room you had a perfect view of the factory where Karl had taken up residence to try and survive on his own
- And when one morning you saw smoke coming out of the chimneys, no force on Earth could stop you from going over there to investigate
- Pushing the heavy metal doors, you stumbled inside resorting to your brain's autopilot setting to help you navigate the factory
- Given the many times you had visited the place, its layout had been imprinted in your brain, you just had to remember it
- The bad part about it was that more than 80% of what was in front of you was nothing like what resided in your memory
- The factory was filled with machinery you had never seen before, certain it wasn't there before
- You were also certain there weren't any metal rods flying around the place before
- Speaking of flying metal rods, one was flung at you, stopping half an inch away from puncturing your skull through and through
- You were left breathless, unable to even let out a single sound, let alone move
- "An uninvited guest, I see..."
- You were busy restoring your lungs' ability to work properly when a man made his way into your line of sight
- When he saw you, when he recognized you, he immediately froze, the metal rod which till that point was stuck mid-air cluttered to the floor, the sound of the impact snapping you out of your daze
- "K-Karl...."
- "Y/N....oh God, it really is you...."
- He made an attempt at a step towards you but seemed to change his mind halfway through, taking that step backwards instead
- "I...I'm s-so sorry....." With that he whirled around, speed-walking away
- But he didn't get far
- You jogged to catch up to him, grabbing him by the sleeve of his coat
- "Karl, wait.....don't leave me again...." You pleaded, the sound of your voice more than enough to make him turn back around again
- You saw the tears in his eyes as he spoke
- "There's no 'again', Y/N. The me you knew left and he won't be coming back....I'm not him. I'm a monster..."
- "Don't you fucking say that!" You complained, harshly letting go of him, "I know what I felt with that you and I know what I feel looking at you now and nothing has changed! You can't label yourself as a monster on my behalf! That's something for me to do and something I'd never do! You're not a monster, Karl. You never were nor will you ever be."
- You took his hand in yours
- "You don't know what I'll be...what if....what if I accidentally hurt you....what if I...."
- "I'll know it was an accident....I'll know you never intended to hurt me." You ran your free hand along his cheekbone, collecting the tear that spilled onto your finger, "You don't label a monster by their exterior, you look at how rotten they are inside instead."
- With that you pressed his forehead to yours, your hand keeping him in place so he wouldn't choose to take off running
- But he was tired of running
- And he'd never run from you
- Not when you were the only person to truly care about him and make him feel safe
- Not when he cared about you so much and wanted to do nothing but protect you for the rest of his life
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