#it would save me so much trouble

[fwoosheye]

*sighs* Not again

Okay so it's another LU idea and can someone please adopt it so it will leave me alone? Anyone? I have too many projects already. Someone please save me!

Anyway. This is a "Legend is the last one to join the chain" idea. He was practically raised by Fi after he pulled the Master Sword for the first time (was it @bokettochild who came up with that? I know I've read some really good fics with that but I'm not sure I remember by who correctly. Please correct me if I've mixed people up), and it takes place on Lorule's Death Mountain. Link is a regular at the Treacherous Tower, because it's an easy way to earn money and with the Triforce restored the monsters aren't as mindless as before so he actually befriends them (though I hc the monsters in the T-Tower were the least mindless to begin with (at least the ones in the audience, maybe the ones one fights were caught mindless ones), probably around the level of Blind the Ex-Sage the Thief, and that they just became more "stable" and better att communicating when the Triforce was restored). Anyway when the story takes place, Link is actually filling in for the final boss because the Purple Moldorm is sick and their new Union demands sick time or something.

When the chain appears in Lorule it's fairly near the T-Tower and when they ask the Devilish Girl about the Hero and learn he's the final boss, they realize someone will have to get up there and defeat him for his shift to end. She will only let one of them enter, so Sky, Warriors or Wild traverse the Tower with the Master Sword in hand (and I'd pick one of those three because they're aware of Fi's presence. Wild might be post-TotK Wild).

When Sky/Wars/Wild finally makes it to Legend there's some brief chatting, and when they attempt to attack each other they simultaneously get their hands burned and Legend accidentally hisses an undignified "Mom!" at Fi making the other Hero realise this teen was practically raised by a sword (and yes this is the scene that gives me the urge to write this, please save me). It becomes a sword-less battle, because Legend shift won't end if he's not defeated and his (magical?) contract don't permit him to hold back more than making it non-leathal. Tri-Force Heroes might've taken place before ALBW for this fic so Legend actually can use doppels/doppel medallion/etc so there 3v1 for a bit. Surprising move from Sky/Wars/Wild eventually sees Legend defeated and he meets the rest of the chain. He probably offers to guide them to the Castle to talk with Princess Hilda, if it doesn't turn out they've managed to get the information they want from the monsters on the audience while they watched. Maybe the chain are chatting about different friendly/civil monsters they've met during their adventures while descending the mountain. And/or Sky/Wars/Wild asks Legend why he addressed his sword as mom.

And because I am utterly incapable of keeping a story idea short, I was also considering to make it so Link is stuck in Lorule because the bracelet only had enough power left to send one of them home to Hyrule and both Link and Princess Hilda agreed Princess Zelda should be the one to return. Ravio would in that case likewise be stuck in Hyrule because he didn't have enough magic. He had probably managed to sneak into Hyrule's Sacred Realm trying to go home and met Zelda as she came back so he knew Link had won, though he might've left before Zelda made her wish (or even woke up?) and thinks Lorule and Link is gone. Maybe. It has some sweet juicy angst potential to let Ravio think his home and hero are destroyed. But also including this would for sure make it a longer fic...

#i wish my brain could write all the ideas as far as i get them #it would save me so much trouble #if this appeals to you or someone you know please adopt it #i'm trying so hard to not start a new one #linked universe #lu fic idea #lu fic #lu #fic idea #maybe i should reblog this to my prompt blog #it's not my usual prompt format but it basically is one #fanfiction prompt #i guess this could work with other loz au:s too but i'm not as well versed in those so i went with the lu version #if anyone adopts this they can make any changes they want/need

[p4nishers]

crowley saying "if any harm comes to aziraphale because of this i will–" to gabriel is SO fucking special to me bc he was so clearly afraid of gabriel after the trial like just look at his reaction when he first sees him and him saying he spent a WHOLE NIGHT worrying that gabriel's gonna smite him like he's actually terrified and still after ALL THAT he still threatens gabriel and i just think threatening someone like THAT is actually so vulnerable bc he's making it abundantly clear that he cares for aziraphale and wants him safe and that aziraphale is HIS to protect and he WILL protect him no matter fucking what and i just i can't deal with how outright and upfront crowley was this season not only with aziraphale but with other people ABOUT aziraphale too like he was really not fucking around this season and he needed everyone to know aziraphale is his and made gabriel almost JUMP OUT OF A WINDOW for wanting to hurt aziraphale and the vulnerability of it all is making me go NUTS

#that sceen plays on a loop in my mind i can't get over it #and the fucking 'its always too late' that follows after makes me wanna bash my skull into pieces like oh my GOD he is so fucking scared an #tired and its ALWAYS TOO FUCKING LATE and aziraphale is always getting into trouble bc he's literally the best fucking thing ever and #crowley was too late to save him one time and he's literally terrified out of his mind that it's gonna happen again like you can't tell me #the bookshop fire didn't leave a HUGE scar and impact on crowley and made him literally scared shitless to let aziraphale out of his sight #again let alone leave him alone w his abusive ex boss like my bbg was going thru it SO MUCH this season and just wanted aziraphale safe and #he would actually do anything ANYTHING for him and i genuinely need to lie down for a minute hold on #good omens #good omens s2 #azicrow #crowley #aziraphale #aziracrow #ineffable spouses #good omens season 2 #ineffable husbands #go s2

[finntheehumaneater]

thinking about Eddie, who because of the upsidedown was in a coma for effectively the rest of '86. When he woke up he had to re-learn a lot of shit, since even after he could open his eyes and sit up, moving was still hard.

Steve and Robin go with him to all of his PT appointments as he works on moving and standing up, but not walking yet. The therapist overhears him complaining to Steve about how he misses writing, since his hands are too shaky for the words to be legible.

She tells him that if he wants to write better he should practice more, and maybe pick something else up that requires small, repetitive movements, like sewing or crocheting.

Eddie is about to open his mouth to say that sewing might be a good idea, because he can work on putting his old patches onto the new vest that the kids bought him as a "we're glad you're not dead present", when Robin comes back from the bathroom and pipes up that she has some crocheting stuff from when she and Steve tried to learn together a few years back, and that's the end of that conversation.

crocheting is his least favorite part of the night, even if Robin and Steve are patient and let him pick the movie in the background and don't get frustrated when he drops the hook between the couch cushions for the thirtieth time in an hour.

Eventually he gets the hang of it, but--out of spite--refuses to make anything other than a very long line with his yarn, telling Steve and Robin he's going to strangle them with it when he's done, because crocheting "is literally the least metal thing in the world."

He stops threatening to strangle Robin after she makes him a little bat.

#i saw a girl at my PT appointment who got recommended this and she looked mortified #but her bf got so excited and went “fuck yeah babe i'm gonna make you SO MUCH STUFF!” #it was adorable #Steddie #Steve Harrington #Eddie Munson #Robin Buckley #Stobin #i just think that robin and eddie would be best friends #i'm crocheting myself a blanket it's taking forever and i hate it but i do it when i watch movies because i don't have to worry about #what to do with my hands #Steddie drabbles #might write this one day #or someone else could take inspo and save me the trouble i dunno how tf i would describe how you crochet #my post #stranger things #steve x eddie #finn writes

[skrrtscree]

submerged in water 🌊🩵💙

#persona 3 #persona #p3 #persona 3 reload #p3 reload #minato arisato #makoto yuki #persona 3 protagonist #persona 3 fanart #persona 3 art #persona fanart #THISWAS AN ACTUAL ASS TO POSE WTF #i still had trouble with the water as well #yk i couldve just redrew the menu in ky style and that would save me so much time and pain #but nooooo i gotta go for the idea that sends me into burnout😭 #BUT ITS DONE NOW #SO HARHAH

[franticfloralfrenfern]

More ddvau by @kitsuneisi and @xmaruu11 because the guys have taken over my brain

#hermitshipping #trafficshipping #ddvau #desert duo vigilante au #ddvau fanart #scarian #sjkfhkdjfs hope you lovely artists dont mind me @ing you im losing my mind over here /pos #ANYWHO HI OMG #so while i was drawing i thought about like #the aftermath of the... mother spore situation?? #like.... hOW much trouble is grian going to be in for not being catalogued as a witch?? #will this affect his powers long-term??????? #will he be fired???? #what if he's fired??? #hotguy will probably be the one to reach out to him when all is over because he'll lose sO much #BUT WHAT IF HOTGUY HAS TO ARREST HIM AFTERWARDS?? #HOW WOULD SCAR LIVE WITH HIMSELF IN THAT SITUATION #UGH. THE TURMOIL. IM HURTING IN THE BEST WAY. #at any rate seeing one of your friends being taken over by some fungus THING cannOT be good for your longterm mental health and safety #first pic is really a study in expressions #second i had fun with poses #third i like seeing cuteguy saving people in the mundane :)))) like the peoples superheroooo

[theloveinc]

barbarian!bakugo + buying apples. you’ll notice I didn’t put any work into this making it more … fantasy-like. And that’s bc… I still couldn’t figure out how😞

(warning: misogyny, you are described as a maiden / dress wearing, you have a pa, world building sucks, bakugo … doesn’t talk)

-

Being the only maiden on one of barbarian!Bakugo’s cross country journeys. I’m not sure yet how or why you’re there, but I’d say he’s traveling and one of his fellow clansmen took you as a prize, or maybe you just hitched a ride on their cart yourself.

But they stop in a small village one day, parking their horses at the edge of a town square of cobblestone and brick, merchant booths surrounding the small shops: of butchers and farmers and fishermen and traders, all rowdy and beaming as they show off their wares.

The men split up (the one with green hair in a leather vest declaring he needs a blacksmith, the lanky one with dark bangs in the direction of new snare wire), though the bulky blonde one (the one in thick furs and pelts who’s never really spoken to you) stays around, picking at the shiny, pink apples of a booth quite close to where the cart you sit on in boredom is parked.

“Five gold for a sack, sir” the man behind the creaky, wooden stand says. He’s stout, thin-haired and wrinkly, all his years in the sun selling fruit showing proudly on his tanned skin. He gestures to the wide array of fruits, each like a piece of candy he wants to show off.

Bakugo (you think his name his, or rather, that’s how he was introduced to you by the redhead with unnaturally sharp teeth, biggest of the group) glances up, frown thin and tense and blood red eyes narrowed. His shoulders shift, the muscles of his exposed stomach rippling as he breathes, the smooth skin of his forehead pinching as if he’s calculating a sale just as he would any other battle or raid.

The sign next to both the men clearly states that apples are two gold a sack. Pears are three, plums are one. “But I’ll give you a deal for four gold,” the man continues.

The blonde ponders, inspecting the apples diligently as if they could be poison, or a waste of a trade. His eyes narrow slightly, lips pursing, and you realize, in his reaching for coin, the intuition he so usually takes pride in (saving the men once from a brutal hound attack, and you, too, another time when a swamp dweller caught the hem of your trousers) is not there… and that they don’t use the same alphabet. Maybe he can’t even… read.

“For two gold,” you call.

Both parties look to you. One set of eyes in an suspicious glare, the other in a tart and angry bitterness. The merchant’s leathery face sinks into a melted frown, his fists clenching as your own hand shields your eyes from the bright sun and hides a protective squint.

“Didn’t your pa ever tell you not to meddle in grown men’s business?” he half-shouts back, the laugh in his voice now tangled with a snarl, downright and plain rude.

“The sign says two,” swinging off your seat, you smooth down your simple frock as you point to the wooden board stained with charcoal that’s hung up next to him. “One sack of apples for two gold.”

Bakugo’s eyebrows raise for the briefest of seconds, then fall in another glare as his hand drops from where he holds his coin (in small, canvas bag tied to his belt with thin, leather cord. It sags against his hip, his pants dipping and uncovering a v-line that descends further into a region you’ve only seen once; at a bathing river in the hills, the bare curve and marks of your own hips exposed—)

“Don’t know where you picked up letters, missy,” the merchant scoffs. “Reading is men’s work.”

You approach the barbarian’s side, his head (messy with hair) tilted towards you as he watches on in silence. From the pocket of your dress, you take out two gold of your own and flick them on the table before you.

“My pa taught me how.”

Then you take Bakugo’s hand (thick and rough and hard to hold) in one of yours and march right back to the horses and cart. Bag of sweet, pink apples in the other.

#bakugou x reader #Bakugo #I am so lazy #I just wanted to post this lmfao sorry if it’s sucks #will fix any mistakes soon! #I’ve just been caught up in this weird fantasy of like…. being captured by some barbarians and surprising them with your sophistication #and saving them from some weird sh*t #I think it would surprise Barbarry Bakugo if u like . could read and he couldn’t #but this is like. a bad representation of that LOL #idk why I’m having so much trouble with the fantasy set up #gusss well just have to deal #dunno .. I have no concept of anything #anyway this was kind of a shout out to my own dad #whos an alc*holic n*mbskull hillbilly b*astard dropout but wanted me to be educated and cultured more than anything growing up #so weird #i must be so tired to be telling u all this… or it’s the lexapro #either way ENJOY SORRY #I miss and love u all #caitie post #gen

[icewindandboringhorror]

sometimes looking at like Self Help Strategies lists for the symptoms I'm having is always just like:

thing that I already do

thing I have tried 10 times

thing I already do

thing that I don't have the money to do

thing I already do

thing I've been doing since I was 10yrs old to no avail

thing that is impossible given my situation

thing that doesn't apply to me

thing that I already do

thing I have already tried

hrmm, oh wait, maybe finally- OH, yeah.. okay. thing that I already do but it was just phrased slightly differently

thing I have already done

#I think maybe productivity tips help less if the reason you're unproductive is partially like.. physcial health and other extenral things #out of your control. rather than just like having trouble paying attention or spending too much time on tiktok or whatever #all the strategic to do lists in the world are not going to somehow prevent me from waking up with a debilitating migraine or whatever #or having external stressors or lacking resources and connections or other Productivity Essentials etc. #especially many tips involve stuff like 'cut off from social media' since thats the modern day time waster for so many poeple #and it's like.. lol.. i can hardly even maintain a blog even thuogh i actively WANT TO DO SO. 'shut off your smart phone!' already #done babey i fucking hate smart phones i shall never use an app unless i am forced to. 'delete tiktok' yep. already covered. tiktok and #all of those thinsg are my enemies. 'save money by cancelling some of your services' cool. already ahead of you. #who the fuck is out here paying for like 10 different subscription services. pirated videos uploaded to google drive and youtube to mp3 #my beloved. etc. etc. and so on. 'socialize less' .........LOL.. if only you knew.. mr.writer of the article. i can barely muster #talking to friends more than once a month and even less if I'm actively sick (often occurence) etc. etc. ... hewoo #I think maybe instead of generic productivity tips I need more like.. how to refocus and be productive anyway even if you have a headache #or are nauseous or etc. Not that those are always things to ignore. and of course you should let your body rest and etc. But plenty of peop #e have mild physical symptoms and just work through them. Ithink something about the way my body/mind is SOO hyper attuned to all #sensory information just makes it like... constantly 'GRR well I cant focus on WRITING right now because my lef #t ear feels weird and my socks are too itchy and my back has a strange pressure and I'm vaguely warm and my eye feels some ssort of #way it doesnt normally feel and I'm hyperaware of my breathing and also nauseous for no reason' and like half of those things I #think '''normal''' people wouldnt even notice or at least would be able to just live through. but for me it's like.. nealry impossible to i #gnore and soooo distracting always. like 'wahh.. nooo we can't draw or get anything done.. my legs feel slightly heavy or something!!' #like............. ok......... who cares. thats not even a PAIN sensation it's just something weird. but it's just like.. NO. constant #mental alerts about the 'heaviness' of your legs be upon ye. Though Imean like.. yes.. 70% of the time I am in genuine pain #or having some sort of actual ailment with trackable physical symptoms. but sometimes it's just like... we could totally be working right #now and ignoring this silly thing but my brain is fixated on it for no reason uncontrollably. etc. etc. I guess it's the same way that like #most people can go to a grocery store without the whole experience being so overwhelming and so much stuff going on at once #that they have to rest afterwards but like.. in my own HOME doing NOTHING i feel like I should be able to not get overwhelmed lol. ANYWAY #Rolling my bastard little rock up a dumbass hill and so on and so forth

[aq2003]

i think twelve and clara are starting to make sense to me but i don't think it's what moffat intended or how the ppl that like them see their dynamic

#they are so obsessed with each other but not as people but the ideas of each other. #twelve's whole character to me feels like the grieving immortal that no longer has anything as a buffer #between him and the weight of the universe. so he sees clara as this culmination of every one of the companions he's lost before #and that adds up. what w/ eleven meeting versions of clara and seeing them die. that adds up w/ clara's presence in heaven sent #faceless and just telling him what to do. she is the companion he cannot fail this time (but he also #cannot reconcile how one of the reasons he keeps someone like her around is /because/ she's mortal) #meanwhile clara bc of her time in the tardis and how she was treated by eleven. thinks herself to be more than she is #she thinks she's owed so much in her life and she thinks she can handle all of it. like ten in waters of mars #so she views twelve and the life in the tardis as an affirmation of what's so extraordinary about her #which is also how she sees danny. i think her character really sings if this is the main idea w/ her relationships with others #bc it's how the doctor acted around her when he first met her. not seeing her as a person but as an idea a mystery a means to an end #so of course as someone who becomes more and more like the doctor as time goes on it makes so much sense that this would be so central #just like how w martha's doctorfication arc it was about self-sacrifice and violence and death. bc that's how ten acted around her #twelve and clara still have the standard traits of doctor and companion of course. the doctor saves the companion when they're in trouble. #the companion remembers to care when the doctor forgets. but they're going through familiar motions as they #start to lose more and more of themselves by being around each other. bc they don't really see the other person #and that's why their dynamic is so obsessive and toxic #dr who #12 era #now this reading has made both characters make a lot of sense to me but also this has tanked my enjoyment of hell bent #in how clara's arc resolves. i won't elaborate more on that until i actually get to it on the rewatch though

[justashamwithwastedpotential]

I was making my morning rounds around the house to say good morning to my spouses and kids when Lance's daughter just bolted from the kitchen to the opposite end of the house phasing through every object in her path including the wall, and continued running halfway out into The Void before stopping.

Funnily enough, I named her "Luna" after Luna Lovegood so maybe I should have expected something like that to happen eventually.

I can't wait for Magnus to come knocking on my door concerning the new magical anomalies coming from my house.

#this kid is going to get me into so much trouble with the Ministry ❤️ #Magnus is now the only person with enough experience to babysit #save him #I'm sure Morgan would be like an older sibling to her #despite the fact that she already the youngest of 7 #it'd be nice for her to grow up with someone else with magic #stardew valley #sdv #sve #stardew valley expanded #sve lance #stardew #stardew lance #my beloved ♥️ #sdv farmer #sve magnus #stardew valley mod #stardew valley expanded lance #sve wizard #sdv lance #sdv wizard

[theygender]

Tbh as an autistic person who's in the top percentiles on some measures of intelligence and in the bottom percentiles on other measures of intelligence I often feel like I'm living my life like that one SpongeBob scene where he makes a circle by drawing an incredibly detailed portrait and erasing lines until only the outline is left. I rank pretty high up on vocabulary and my brain always defaults to Big Words, but I don't want to sound pretentious or make it hard for other people to understand me so I have to actively work to mentally convert into smaller synonyms as I'm talking/typing, which means I start off with the type of obtuse language you would read in a research paper or some shit and then I have to intentionally put in More Effort just to sound normal. And if my brain is too tired to make connections appropriately then sometimes I can't even remember synonyms like "bad" and I end up having to stick with malicious or malevolent or smth in a simple shitpost, which is basically like I'm trying to draw a circle and my brain just tells me "sorry buddy best I can do is the portrait" 😭 help

#currently having to put in a lot of work at my job to learn how to do meeting summaries better #bc i tend to be WAY over-thorough in documenting things and i put so much detail in that its way too long for anyone to actually read #and you would not believe how much effort it takes me to write FEWER notes #bc for me writing fewer notes doesnt mean i can just write fewer notes #it means i have to write the exact same amount of notes and then go back through each individual piece of info #to decide whether its something i can remove or something i should leave in #and whether/how i can shorten the notes that i AM keeping in #like. it really sucks actually. i dont like that my brain defaults to the portrait and then i have to put a bunch of effort into undoing it #bc like my work didnt ASK me for portraits. they asked me for circles #and i wish i could just fucking draw a circle up front to save myself the trouble 😮‍💨 #maybe with more practice #rambling

[ricketybonez]

spent five hours today cleaning my goddamn laptop and at least two if not two and a half of those were on the keyboard alone and its still kind of grody in there but i literally could not bring myself to care at that point but i had all the key caps off so i still had to clean it a little bit and fiddle with those stupid tiny plastic mother fuckers that go between the key cover and the rubber nipple and i lost one part of one so may have to buy a whole new key and ANYWAY. this is a very long way of saying that if you have one of those little usb desk vacuums i hate you and also please buy me one

#.txt #would have saved me SO much trouble you have no idea #the number of q tips i went through is frankly unconscionable

[princekirijo]

You know thinking about it Riku could also be a Lovers Arcana character. His story + arc very much revolves around his relationships with other characters (particularly his family and most importantly himself).

Captain is ultimately his arcana however because I feel like his stubbornness and his like willingness to keep going is what makes him a Chariot character (as Captain is an alternative to Chariot). He's also a very devoted/emotional character and I think that plays into it too!

#oc tag #riku kirijo #omg me talking about riku wow who would have guessed #kinda nervous making this idk why #oh also his like spite i feel like that plays into the chariot arcana as well #but yeah i've been writing out his bio and i just finished up the personality section + talking about him with my gf #and yeah came to the conclusion that riku is a really emotionally driven character #it very much comes through in his actions #like one of his friends are in danger and he'll just run into the situation without any thought for himself because he needs to save them!! #as my gf put it: #the kinda guy whose heart overflows and then he does something a bit...silly #he is a super silly guy who loves the people he cares about so much he will do something stupid #all the while acting like charming and a bit cocky LMAOOO #ann: why did you run headfirst into that shadow mass i know makoto was in trouble but wtf #riku: ahha well you see i knew i could take em they were pretty easy #ann: you nearly died #riku: ... but i DIDNT #i've actually been writing. again. and ive been practicing getting him down so thats where this is coming from #again to quote my gf: hes a stubborn boy he likes to cry under his covers without asking anyone for help bc hes a silly boy hes swaggy #she gets him because i talk to her a LOT about him lmao #im sorry these are messy i just love my guy sm #he's my silly thing my dumbass my best friend my son

[thefiresofpompeii]

today i found out that when i was 4 and exhibiting signs of being Exceedingly Weird my mum’s best friend suggested she take me to see a child psychologist to figure out what’s wrong with me but my doting mother replied that her sweet daughter is just ‘sensitive’ and will ‘grow up to be a genius’ and refused to get me checked out 🤔🤔

#IMAGINE IF I’D HAVE HAD SUPPORT FROM EARLY CHILDHOOD. HOW MUCH MORE WELL ADJUSTED I WOULD HAVE BEEN #obviously; professionally dxed people have their own struggles; such as infantilisation and refusal of autonomy #and also they can’t legally move to eugenicsland new zealand #but it would have saved me so much trouble still #jamie.txt

[crepuscularqueens]

yeah well maybe if the magicians didn’t suck so fucking much and more than 12 people had watched it you guys would have realized the power penntin could have

#me in the year two thousand and twenty two: and here's how penntin can still win #people who think penny is the one who would have trouble speaking his feelings here??? mr. 'i need you'???? #mr. jumps in front of a knife to save your life? mr. saves you from a nightmare hell inside your own head. grow up!!!!!! #if anyone bothered to pay attention to penny's actions instead of the fact that he was vaguely bitchy #(when every other character is allowed to be) #we never would have been punished with personality deficient penny!23. beloathed. #i hate that show. i hate that show. i hate that show so much. #penntin

[bpfandomcollective]

On a whim today I bought a ps5 just so I don’t have to wait a second longer to play Horizon: Burning Shores.

#do I have money for this? #no #did I take money from my savings for this? #yes #are there other more practical things I could have spent my money on? #absolutely #do I give a shit? #nope #here we goooo #and by here we go I mean here we go in about 15 hours since everything needs to download to my ps5 #it’s so pretty y’all #and so dumb but I didn’t realize I would be able to transfer all my ps4 games to it seamlessly (again by this I mean in the 100+ hours #it’ll take to download all my ps4 data) #so you know I’ll be back on my tlou bullshit once i finish bs #downloaded red dead redemption 2 and having a bit of trouble grasping the game play #so that is def on the back burner but I still want to go back and finish it one day! #if anyone is reading this and has hame recs for the ps5 let me know! #open to pretty much anything #tlou #horizon forbidden west #horizon burning shores #ps5

[orcelito]

Hm. I just remembered I will have a funeral to go to soon.

#speculation nation #so good at compartmentalizing that i forgot about life events #not... TRULY forgot. of course not. #but i still havent processed it. and im gonna save THAT. for when im not constantly around people lol #i only have a handful of days here & im not spending them being a miserable bastard #does this make me heartless? maybe some would think so. #but i'm just... trying to live my life. the death hasnt touched me yet bc im all the way over here #still doesnt feel real. but i know it will as soon as im with my family again. #im just... letting my emotional regulation do its own thing #i trained it quite extensively when i was a teenager. i am very very good at it. #this... sort of thing is why i suspect i have so much trouble with crying. #aside from a few special circumstances i just dont cry. i just dont. and it's bc of how intensely i compartmentalize i think #ah well. im still in colorado. and it's time to go to bed i think.