#i think. i am v tired. possibly slightly ikl

[soldier-poet-king]

Sometimes reading a completely random standalone fantasy book that u know is probs gonna be mediocre on a whim is just. So indulgent. It feels like fanfiction (affectionate), usually when I say that it's (derogatory). It's like. Here is some sort of garbage but also it's very delicious top tiered garbage, recycling if you will, and has angst and can fit SO MUCH trauma into it and it's like. Here is a fantasy setting but we are using it as backdrop to deal with big serious emotional and interpersonal issues and grief and illness and ptsd and all the stuff I want explored in fiction but in a fantasy setting with queer theives with ptsd and depressed slutty rakish princes and brilliant wizard girls and not in a boring book written by a middle aged white man about divorce and affairs and idk....corporate jobs or whatever Those Types are writing about now

#franposting #im supposed to be reading scholomance and i WILL #but i had already started this + i havea few chapters of assassins quest left #and im just. in a weird mental space #i say as if there are times when i am not in a weird headspace #anyway im just. every few months i will read smthn that is completely 10000% indulgent #sometimes it disappoints #but this one feels. indulgent but in a fun good way.like replaying da2 500 times kind of way #this boy can fit so much mental illness and self neglect in him. this one can fit so much alcoholism and depression. #this girl has SO much of everything in her. im just. #hi hello this is my favourite kind of indulgence #anyway i feel really untethered rn and not in a fun way!!! no filter bc nothing is real #i think. i am v tired. possibly slightly ikl #ill*. or. i got the new booster and i always feel flu like after any vaccine ever #even my fuckin tetanus booster made me sick #so maybe that's it #also its rlly cold. im so cold rn