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scalproie · 3 years

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Pick a favorite TF2 merc? Or do all 9, if you're feeling it.

Oh Im gonna do all 9 lets fucking go.

Scout:

So this guy. Not to accidentaly Meet The Scout but i dont even know where to start with him. Dont let the fact that hes the youngest of the mercs distract you that he is Just Some Guy and I mean this with the most affection I can. That one post wasnt lying, he CAN be any white guy you want him to be. I think Ive met at least 5 scouts in my life. Anyway the best thing about scout is how people draw him in their respective style because this little boston man has the range, babey. 5/10. I know in my heart it should be a 4 but he gets an additional point from me because I like him and he has daddy issues.

Soldier:

Funniest character ever and also really wholesome somehow if you read the comics, has a yell as iconic at the tom one from tom and jerry. doesnt really look that bad either tbh. 7/10 He Makes Me Laugh.

Pyro:

So the suit on itself is cool af and I like how in the... tf2 timeline [citation needed] everyone else goes from "oOooOOOh the Pyro is SO scary" to "This is everyone's little sibling now". 5/10. Schrödinger's attractiveness. But dont get me wrong the Pyro is so fucking cool.

Heavy:

8/10. I love heavy. REALLY love how actually wholesome he is with his friends and family in the comics. He has the looks yeah sure but he most importantly has the SMARTS

Demoman:

Okay objectively. Demo is the handsomest of the mercs. Like you know that one scene in the mann vs machine trailer where the camera focus on his face for a second while hes preparing to aim at the oncoming robots? Yeah. Also he's scottish and that add an additional point. 9/10

Engineer:

So first you look at engineer you're like "oh this is a fun little texan guy who sounds nice in both sense of the word, he's polite and everything. How silly looking he is with that hardhat and those googles :)" and then BAM he takes THOSE off and you're like "oh this is a pretty little texan man😳 AND he's polite."

(Note that he also get a beard at one point but I cant show it because ive already reached the picture limit)

anyway 8/10, short king babey.

Medic:

It is with a heavy (heh) heart that I must say that Im immune to this man😔. I know he mightve kickstart the whole "evil scientist" business in terms of general vibes and batshit insanity but I cant get into it. He IS cool but im blaming overexposure. Still extremely fun when played off with others, but alas not for me. 6/10

Sniper:

What he lost in attractiveness he made up in relatability when I found out he was 26 (and not 28 like I thought he was). He's not pretty, he's my friend sniper :) I could play smash bros with him during a party. He wouldnt go at parties tho and I respect that. Incredible voice tho👌. 6/10, additional point because the way he's drawn in the comics gives him A Vibe.

Spy:

This mf. Listen do I think he's pretty? No I dont. But in typical spy fashion he tricked his way into being my fav because I am physically incapable to resist a good father & son drama and a solid chuck of his character resolves around that. We've all had whiplash during the sudden serious "I've always been proud of you" moment in those usually silly af comics don't lie. Expiration Date was about spy being a dad to scout for 2/3 of it. I like that he's an asshole who cares. I like his character and his role of one straight man of the team. Unfortunately, out of my trio of dilfs, this is the One Certified Deadbeat(tm). 8/10, petite pute💖

#THERE WE GO #somethingwittyandweird #long post #thanks for asking!!!#tf2

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