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anathemanonymous · 3 years

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Spilling it in the first person: truths I need to accept

Well, it's not going well. I feel like I am not moving forward,but backward. I held myself back by trying to do the right thing.

I gave you the whole house in trade for my freedom. There was no end date on the agreement. It simply stated you would get the property and all the responsibility of the associated bills. It also stated you would agree to hold me harmless.

Well, that didnt happen.

I'm still stuck 4 years after leaving. The attorney told me not to pay off the foreclosure but I did. Twice. I stopped the process of filing contempt in August. She was livid. She offered me the option to have you removed from the house and I could keep it. Well, I had just signed the apt lease. A one year contract. How was I supposed to afford two house payments? I didn't want that responsibility. I left the house to prove I wasnt married to this man for the money. He refused to leave. So I did.

Both our names remain on the title. Bank cant take me off. You refuse to sell. You cannot afford to refinance.

What are you trying to do here?

As I am being held in place by obligation you insist upon complaining about how it is my fault that you are suffering. How you are refusing to cooperate. Refuse to work or pay bills. Refuse to accept that I left. Refuse to reach out or grow in healthy ways. Refuse to stop drinking or doing drugs. Refuse to try to improve our shitty relationship. Refuse to reach out to your own child. Refuse to sell the house. Refuse to clean it. Trick me into calling off the attorney at the last foreclosure: you say you will pay me back the $5500 and we can fix up the house. I tell you how uneasy I feel about this deal. You tell me to trust you.

I clean and clean on my days off work and you sit and ridicule and drink. You tell me it's no rush. You literally have no money to fix it up. I have gone round and around with Fred at the agency to get him to agree to put the house on the market and how we need to sell to a qualified buyer. How to ensure no consequences from this home being doomed. How to do the right thing. How to honor the promises to the agency and to the bank. Its ridiculous how often I've triaged with your mother. How many phone calls and notes kept on the research of creating a plan to salvage the property and you.

And you. I have given you money. I have paid your debts. I have taken you to the doctor. I set you up for evaluation of ADHD. You cry about your health. You cant get off the couch. You cry about being broke, depressed with no reason to live. When I speak to you, you continue to put me down, to accuse me of never caring. You accuse me of malicious crimes against you for the past 16 years. You claim I just used you. My entire life was built around supporting you. You accuse me of going against you deliberately. You blame for your behaviors of rude comments and refusals to cooperate or participate in anything related to parenting or household chores or budgeting or my feelings. I was threatened by your recklessness. I was doomed to being overly responsible but got nothing but contempt in return.

There wasn't peace. There wasnt love. No support. Constant arguments and blow ups. Constant strife. Constant pain. Carrying your weight twice my size. Trying to rape me. Trying to negate me. Trying to minimize me. Criticizing every fucking thing I did or said or believed. Faking it in front of your friends and parents. Giving nothing but expecting me to provide for your every need on a whim. Needing help with your business books, spending hours only to be discredited and rejected. You put your shit first. You blocked my path with your messiness. You left it all up to me but gave me no credit, no control and no power. Then accuse me of doing the same to you. You ridiculed my hobbies, my goals, my dreams. You chose your friends over me. You drank to the point of black out every day. You stopped working. Your buisness partner abandoned you even after he stole from the business account, you kept him around. You kept giving him your share of our household bills instead of pay our bills. So I paid. You stole my tax returns for years. You were rude and inconsiderate toward how any of your shitty choices affected me and our family. You have withheld love and given only pain. You ignored my feelings and needs. And now you complain and claim to suffer worse than me?

What about me??

To top it off: after moving out and returning on a regular basis to check in with you even as you deliberately were harming me financially and emotionally...I get hate when I remove the loaded guns in the house bc you're suicidal from all the drugs and no sleep and not eating and not working and I worry and I feel sorry and I want to keep things normal so I see the mess and try not to do the cleaning, the yardwork.

I play with the dogs and feed them and you always leave when I arrive ...or start an argument until you chase me away.

After 4 years of being ridiculed and blamed....instead of being heard and validated.

I have to actually accept that you are openly and intentionally holding me hostage financially and emotionally. You admit it on text. Your mother claims you were just drinking and you didnt mean it. What will it take to justify my actions?

Its been 4 years of waiting on pins and needles. Of not breathing. Or being stuck. Not to mention the 7 years before I left the house. Trying to fix things.

Looking back, I've never received emotional support from you. Other than to stay away from my family.

I have a hard time accepting the fact that you didn't improve yourself when I left. You got worse. You stopped trying long before I left. And I hoped you would recognize how awful you'd become. I was risking a chance that you would change into a responsible adult. Learn to care for me in real ways. Appreciate me, quite frankly. I was looking for appreciation. Recognition. Acceptance. Acknowledgement. The elements of love.

I left because there was no love.

It was the right thing to do.

Unhealthy relationships are meant to fall apart.

Blame me or blame you. It doesn't matter. It takes two to have a relationship. It becomes one sided.

Wait. It was always one sided. I wanted to believe it was a mutual relationship. I dreamed it. I created the illusion of it. But it could not be felt. Bc it was a mirage. It only looked like something real. It felt empty. Like a shell. Like a home without a foundation. Ready to fall apart like a Hollywood studio prop.

I was lying to myself the whole time.

The only way out now is to tell the truth. To let shit fall apart by not adding to it. To stop putting in.

But it feels wrong to let my house go into foreclosure. It feels wrong to file with a lawyer. It feels so wrong to do nothing to help, on purpose. Yet it is the right way. Right? This world is absolutely ridiculous. Just fucking back breaking and disheartening. People are so viscous. Banks and lawyers. Without hearts. Empty motherfucking shells of humans.

I knew the truth but didn't want to face it. Denial is so powerful. It can change the way you see things. Or exclude what you do not want to see. Or feel.

I wanted to believe love could make my dream come true, become real. Make me real.

All the proof was in your actions. Fighting me every step of the way. Calling me crazy. You're right. It is crazy to live that way. I agree.

So if it's TRUE : then I have to accept the reality that you don't care about me. Either you cant, or you are just unwilling. You say you love me. But what does love mean? It seems you only care that I care for you. How much I can give and prove that I care. Prove by sacrificing my needs, time, money, energy.

Every fiber of my being is going against the fact that the only way out of this situation is divorce and foreclosure of my home. Abandoning you. Why does it feel unethical and immoral? Huge conflict within.

I tried to help you and to salvage my credit, I have spent over $15,000 to bail it out . ..because I'd already put so much into it that I want to keep on the same path. I dont want a different anonymous path. I want to stay where its familiar. But then again, why? I've never been happy on this path. From experience, moving on does not guarantee happiness either.

I'm standing my ground. I'm honoring my values of integrity and refusing to tolerate abuse and nonsense.

But yes it's hard to move on bc I am ever-wanting to keep convincing myself and the world ...proof of how mature and dedicated I am, of my own goodness, my own kindness, my own value.

If my value rests on a successful career in marriage then I have discredited myself. I have failed to be a quality product. Yikes.

..because I hid behind it, and I'd do anything to keep up the facade. I am afraid to be seen as alone, maybe. I am afraid to stand up against the abuse bc it means I have failed. That I am faulty. Not worthy. Maybe I asked for it. Or deserve it.

Shame is a terrible feeling.

By the virtue of which I choose to honor, I thereby become less valuable. I protected your reputation. I kept silent. I protected my own reputation as well. Now I am throwing it out the window. Breaking a promise to myself to never do that again. Yes, I have experienced this all before. Many times. Throughout my lifetime. I had to destroy my own identity.

Because I could pretend I belonged. I could pretend I had a healthy relationship and family. But the sacrifice was too much. And I was so off-balance. I was shut off. Closed down. Depressed. Sick.

You refused to lie for me. So I left. We dont have to keep pretending to play house. Maybe that disappointed me. You want to play cops and robbers. I refused. Lol. Whatever.

And maybe the ultimate cage I try to break free from is being forced to stay small, a repeating pattern from throughout my entire childhood. It is the shame I carry. The unworthy nature of my wounded inner child.

When confronted with opening up I remain skeptical and scared. I beat myself up. I feel rejected, disillusioned, hurt, betrayed, and I am ashamed of showing that I am being harmed. I am am afraid to speak up. When I do, I get shut down by you, your family, my attorney, the court, society.

This triple whammy has knocked me off my feet every time I try to stand up. I feel insulted by the slights of neighbors, the sounds of the outside world. I speak up against emotional manipulation and I feel the feather of rejection like a sledgehammer.

... I am accused of being crazy. I post on social media. I get very little support. The message I'm receiving is: your perception is inaccurate, we all have a human right to happiness and respect but you should be ashamed of exposing yourself like that. It makes you look vulnerable, it tarnishes our code of taboo subjects, think about your reputation, bc we as a society are not comfortable with displays of vulnerability. Call a hotline or something.

You know what? I dont need a fucking hotline. My counselor didnt even recognize me during our last phone session. Fuck this system. I'm on my own. And if I have to become more viscous and bitter to fit in, I prefer to stand alone.

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dinafbrownil · 5 years

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Readers React: UVA Doctors Outraged Over Their Own Health System’s Billing Practices

Letters to the Editor is a periodic feature. We welcome all comments and will publish a selection. We edit for length and clarity and require full names.

First Do No Harm: When Financing Health Care Becomes Unethical

We attribute the oldest text of ethics in Western medical practice to Hippocrates (460-370 A.D.), a Greek physician whose oath instructs, “I will use treatment to help the sick according to my ability and judgment, but never with a view to injury and wrong-doing.” Most doctors, having pledged that oath upon entering the profession, recall best its later paraphrasing primum non nocere, first do no harm.

As physicians at UVA Health and educators at the University of Virginia, we were appalled by the revelations of the aggressive, pitiless billing and collections practices, first reported in The Washington Post based on an investigation by Kaiser Health News (“‘UVA Has Ruined Us’: Health System Sues Thousands Of Patients, Seizing Paychecks And Claiming Homes,” Sept. 10). We felt betrayed and we had, by extension, betrayed those who had relied on us. We had harmed.

When we began our positions at UVA, we did so with the understanding that, as clinicians at a public institution, we were privileged to care for all people, including those with limited ability to pay. Many of us chose academic medicine, and UVA specifically, so that we could partner with our patients to improve health and well-being thanks to the social contract specific to tax-exempt hospitals to provide low-cost care to people of all incomes. As we have learned recently about UVA and from stories reported from other states and institutions for more than a decade, avaricious billing and collections practices have broken the spirit, if not the letter, of that social contract (“UVA Doctors Decry Aggressive Billing Practices By Their Own Hospital,” Nov. 23).

The individual stories are heart-rending, and the extent of the collective impact is staggering. Indeed, based on an analysis by the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau in 2014, over half of all collections items in credit reports are associated with medical debt. A recent study of people with new diagnoses of cancer and a representative insurance mix, including the uniquely American categorization of people underinsured, found 42% had depleted their life savings 2½ years after their diagnosis. To be sure, academic medical centers must function within the competitive and revenue-driven environment of our country’s approach to health care, and some, like Hahnemann Hospital in Pennsylvania, have not survived. However, the survival of not-for-profit hospitals cannot be assured by the relentless pursuit of debt from the very patients for whom we are expected to be the safety net.

Senate Finance Committee Chairman Chuck Grassley (R-Iowa) sent a letter on Oct. 17 to the UVA Health System’s acting executive vice president for Health Affairs that detailed questions about billing and collections practices at our institution. We have similar questions. While we applaud UVA for the rapidity with which it has announced reforms aimed at reducing the numbers of lawsuits and making more financial support available, we are uncertain how many future lawsuits will be prevented by restricting that punitive action to those with bills of more than $1,000, and why UVA cannot join other public hospitals that have effectively stopped suing patients altogether?

We simply cannot accept one-off solutions. Over half of all hospitals in the U.S. are not-for-profits, and the regulations that govern billing and collections practices vary by state and fail to offer adequate protection in most. Continued identification of egregious practices at individual institutions is essential, and we are grateful for the work of health care journalists and of members of Congress who have prioritized these issues in the national discourse. Public pressure placed on hospitals has frequently resulted in forgiveness of debt and, in some cases, changes in billing practices. Yet, until we achieve a truly universal health system modeled after other countries with similarly vast monetary wealth but more concrete social moorings, we must pursue an immediate solution to address health care pricing and billing. Such a solution must ensure transparency, as Sen. Grassley rightly highlights in his requests of UVA, and therefore allows for honest conversations about how we, as a country, hope to continue to provide excellent care to all Americans. The National Consumer Law Center’s Model Medical Debt Protection Act could serve as an important starting point.

To be clear, we are outraged. We stand with those that have been financially injured, whose bank accounts have been looted, whose homes have been swallowed as if they were built on quicksand, whose credit scores were ruined and whose mental health and energy were spent in a courtroom or in anxious conversations with lawyers — all as a result of having sought our care. We commit to working at UVA, our beloved professional home, to advocate for leaders of high moral integrity, to regain the trust of our patients and to repair to the greatest extent possible the damage that has been done. We call on our community, and especially our fellow clinicians, to demand that the precious resource of our public, not-for-profit hospitals protect our ethical responsibility to first do no harm.

— Drs. Scott K. Heysell, Michael D. Williams and Rebecca A. Dillingham, University of Virginia, Charlottesville, Va.

It’s good news that predatory hospital billing and collection practices are being questioned (this time at a location we get care from): https://t.co/rT2MlRdnZo

— Jan Oldenburg (@janoldenburg) October 18, 2019

— Jan Oldenburg, Richmond, Va.

The Slippery Slope Of Preventing Falls

I commend Kaiser Health News for shining a light on the dangers of senior falls ― the most common cause of nonfatal trauma-related hospital admissions (“‘Fear Of Falling’: How Hospitals Do Even More Harm By Keeping Patients In Bed,” Oct. 17).

Fears over patient falls are warranted; however, steps should be taken to provide patients with access to physical therapy while in the hospital to prevent loss of strength and mobility. Further, access to physical therapy can help reduce the steep costs associated with falls, which total roughly $50 billion annually.

In the outpatient setting, physical therapists are uniquely qualified to improve a patient’s functional ability and recommend the home modifications necessary to allow them to remain independent.

Whether inside the hospital or in the outpatient setting, patients need to be allowed and encouraged to move and walk under the supervision of a physical therapist. Promoting access to physical therapy will ultimately keep our seniors independent, prevent adverse events and drive down health care costs.

― Nikesh Patel, PT, DPT, executive director of the Alliance for Physical Therapy Quality & Innovation, Washington, D.C.

Another poorly thought through CMS regulation. Quality healthcare cannot be reduced to yes or no questions. ‘Fear Of Falling’: How Hospitals Do Even More Harm By Keeping Patients In Bed https://t.co/GTO1xLTDU6 via @khnews

— Cat Shah (@CatherineShah8) October 22, 2019

— Catherine Shah, Charlotte, N.C.

Kaiser Permanente Therapists Sing The Blues

I’ve been a Kaiser Permanente psychologist for over 25 years. I have seen many changes with Kaiser and I am tired of having to shortchange my patients of much-needed treatment services (“Bruising Labor Battles Put Kaiser Permanente’s Reputation On The Line,” Nov. 8). I wrote this song on behalf of my therapist colleagues in protest for better working conditions for patient care in the Department of Psychiatry at Kaiser. I recorded it with another colleague, Matt Torres, and two musician friends who are Kaiser members and sympathetic to the NUHW cause.

― Eugenie Hsu, Oakland, Calif.

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Not Either/Or, But Sometimes Both

The article “Meth Trip Or Mental Illness? Police Who Need To Know Often Can’t Tell” (Nov. 1) failed to delve into how often individuals whom police interact with are experiencing mental health or behavioral problems in conjunction with substance use disorders.

The police in this article said they need to know whether they’re dealing with a mental health issue or drugs in order to respond appropriately. In Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration’s 2018 report “Key Substance Use and Mental Health Indicators in the United States,” the percentages of adults who used illicit drugs in the past year were higher among those with serious mental illness (49.4%) and adults with any mental illness (36.7%), compared with those without any mental illness (15.7%).

Since there is such a high chance that people with mental illness are also using substances that can alter their clinical presentation, the police should be trained to prepare for modalities that can accommodate that, keeping themselves and those they serve safe.

― Xi Lucy Shi, Pittsburgh

Standing By Drug Treatment For ADHD

I am a child psychiatrist with a research and clinical focus on treatment of attention deficit hyperactivity disorder. I recently submitted a grant to the National Institute of Mental Health examining the evidence for and against stimulant treatment. The individuals quoted in the article “Pediatricians Stand By Meds For ADHD, But Some Say Therapy Should Come First” (Sept. 30), arguing that behavioral interventions are effective enough to be considered the first choice in ADHD treatment, aren’t correct.

Repeated, large-scale, well-controlled double-blind studies have shown that, with the exception of preschool/kindergarten children: (1) Medication for ADHD is shown to be significantly more effective than behavioral interventions, with behavioral treatments for ADHD only mildly effective or not effective at all. (2) Medication improves long-term outcomes, such as reduction of motor vehicle accidents, accidental physical injury and delayed educational progression. (3) Untreated ADHD is associated with increases in suicide risk, legal issues, divorce rate, job loss, substance use, motor vehicle accidents and self-esteem issues.

While the 6-year-old child in this article has tantrums (which might improve with only behavioral interventions), a school-aged or older child with ADHD would have problems with attention and concentration in school ― hurting his/her early learning. Symptoms of attention and concentration are particularly poorly responsive to behavioral interventions.

Behavioral treatment is not the first choice because delaying treatment can quickly have consequences, while medication treatment is very low-risk, yet dramatically effective.

― Dr. Ryan S. Sultan, New York City

Modifying classroom instruction and using behavioral supports should be first. Then meds if they are needed at the lowest effective dose along with modification and behavioral support. Jeez

— Terri Lewis, PhD 和平抵抗 (@tal7291) October 1, 2019

— Terri Lewis, Silver Point, Tenn.

On Astronomical Air Ambulance Costs

Your recent story about the cost of air ambulance services (“Bill of the Month: The Air Ambulance Billed More Than His Surgeon Did For A Lung Transplant,” Nov. 6) failed to paint the full picture. Recently, my wife had a Type A aortic dissection. She was transported to emergency surgery via helicopter air ambulance for a six-hour-long heart operation that saved her life. Our bill for the air ambulance was over $81,000 for the hour-long flight. What I learned from this incident is that there are only four hospitals in all of California where this operation is performed. Without the air ambulance, I would have likely been planning a funeral instead of dealing with over $750,000 in medical bills. The highly trained crews of these operations save lives every day. Most fly a helicopter, which costs $6,000,000 before it is equipped as a flying ICU. Most fly between one and three flights in a 24-hour period, on average. They are manned 24/7, equipped to fly in the clouds and equipped with night-vision capability. Nearly all are single-pilot crews (to keep costs lower) and have at least one flight nurse (most have two). All have training and qualification maintenance costs for the equipment and personnel. In consideration of all of these costs (note: I did not include facility or insurance costs), I think their cost to the patient is not out of line with other medical costs today.

I noted there was no talk of using a ground ambulance in the article. Was it time-critical for the patient? In other words, would it have had a similar outcome if a ground ambulance been used? In our case, the two extra hours a ground ambulance would have consumed would have likely concluded in a fatality.

The other side of this conversation revolves around how patients are billed and how our current system works to be the most expensive system in the world with only mediocre results. Nearly all billing is reduced by some amount by the insurance ― often called a discount. Because doctors and hospitals know they will receive only between half and three-quarters of what they bill, they inflate the billing so they get what the need to cover most costs. The big loser is the patient, who is underinsured or not insured at all.

The article as written is a very incomplete picture of the air ambulance world and a disservice to your readers.

― Dennis Lyons, Paso Robles, Calif.

Just read your article about helicopter charges. Why not educate the public that they can purchase helicopter insurance, which is very cheap? I highly recommend it to friends who live in rural areas with hospitals that do not offer a full range of services or who need transportation to receive a higher level of trauma care. A bigger problem: the huge health care systems ― whether privately managed or government-run ― that have associates with these rural hospitals or own them. They want patients to stay in their system and will bypass other hospitals that are closer and offer the same services. Choices of care are not always given to patients, or when they are given, they are brief and come in a moment of crisis when patients and families can’t take it all in. How about educating the public on what really is happening and how we continue to waste health care dollars and how they can protect themselves in advance? Call the air transport company and learn about their insurance.

― Nina Jeffords, Miramar Beach, Fla.

The associated "fact sheet" was equally bizarre and rather incoherent..this is a far cry from the normal professional and policy-oriented communications we expect from HHS.

— Dr. Cheryl Phillips (@phillic58) October 4, 2019

— Dr. Cheryl Phillips, Washington, D.C.

Don’t Let Fact Check Undermine Facts

Shefali Luthra did an excellent point-for-point takedown of President Donald Trump’s speech at a conservative retirement community in Florida, which amounted to a cynical gambit of frightening Caucasian seniors into believing that their long-cherished Medicare was under attack from the Democratic “socialist” and the freeloading communities they represent (“KHN & PolitiFact HealthCheck: Trump Speech Offers Dizzying Preview Of His Health Care Campaign Strategy,” Oct. 3).

One critical point that she and others, including the Democratic candidates for president, however, have failed to give sufficient emphasis to, is the degree that household income will actually increase in response to a “Medicare for All” plan. Trump stated in this speech, with no evidence, that household income will go down $17,000 a year with Medicare for all. Although there will be a tax increase to fund this program, the increase will pale in comparison to what we are already paying in premiums and deductibles to a predatory insurance industry. Ms. Luthra only went so far as to question the accuracy of that absurd assertion. Failure to drive this point home will invariably allow the masses to revert to the default mode of “socialized equals a tax increase ― end of story,” and put its long-overdue implementation at risk.

― Samantha Derrick, Berkeley, Calif.

Good, in-story fact check.But could context that current efforts aimed at serious reducing protections through ACA and #GOP has never offered any legitimate alternative > Trump Speech Offers Dizzying Preview Of His Health Care Campaign Strategy https://t.co/8waboBoT1B via @khnews

— jerrymberger (@jerrymberger) October 4, 2019

— Jerry M. Berger, Boston

Under Pressure To Treat Lymphedema

Great story about a little-known expense patients have for compression garments (“Compression Garments Can Ease Lymphedema. Covering Costs? Not So Easy,” Oct. 23). I had to purchase some to wear for a short time for lupus-related swelling and I was shocked at how much they cost. They definitely make a big difference in comfort, and I really think insurers should pay. As they also help to prevent infection, it may make coverage cost-effective in the long run. Is there a petition I can sign to support legislation? I will call my Congress members as well. Thanks for the article!

― Kristan Thompson, Savannah, Ga.

Penalties Run Afoul

In response to Jordan Rau’s article on Medscape.com (“New Round of Medicare Readmission Penalties Hits 2,583 Hospitals,” Oct. 1): If the hospital does not want to be penalized for readmission, well, the hospital staff can just let the patient die. On the contrary, the hospital should be rewarded for saving the life of the patient, and that is all that should concern Medicare. The hospital should be penalized for any patient deaths, period! Because the way around that penalty from Medicare is to just let the patient die in the hospital. It should be that the hospital is recognized for giving treatment to the best quality care that the hospital can provide! Someone should look into Medicare’s revolting penalty system.

― Lois Greene, Sacramento, Calif.

Wow! 2,583 hospitals were penalized for heart failure readmissions in 2020, including @BrighamWomens, @MassGeneralNews, and @BIDMChealth. If everyone is penalized, is the program actually effective? @kejoynt @rkwadhera https://t.co/KAIELu819A

— Aaron Paul Kithcart (@APKithcartMDPhD) October 2, 2019

— Dr. Aaron Paul Kithcart, Boston

Entrenched Stigma

The cumulative effect of “experts” telling the public there is a stigma to mental illnesses (“Taking The Cops Out Of Mental Health-Related 911 Rescues,” Oct. 11) ought to draw considerably more attention.

― Harold A. Maio, Fort Myers, Fla., former editor of Boston University’s Psychiatric Rehabilitation Journal

I had injured/panicked bipolar client strapped on board call me frm accident scene bc cops on the way. She was afraid they’d shoot her. I get there, find Fire Capt next 2 her ready 2 protect her. Taking The Cops Out Of Mental Health-Related 911 Rescues – https://t.co/6f7k9Ehdf7

— R. Ruth Linden, PhD (@TOLHlthAdvocate) October 21, 2019

― R. Ruth Linden, San Francisco

Nurse Practitioners Answer The Call

Your Oct. 9 article “They Enrolled In Medical School To Practice Rural Medicine. What Happened?” underscores the growing primary care provider crisis in rural America. Nationwide, the demand and need for primary care, especially in rural areas, leaves patients without care.

According to the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, 80 million Americans lack access to primary care, with the most significant shortages in rural areas. By 2030, the country is expected to face shortages of more than 120,000 primary care physicians.

The nation’s 270,000 nurse practitioners (NPs) can address the shortage. In fact, a study in Health Affairs found NPs now represent 1 out of 4 health care providers in rural health practices. NPs assess patients, order and interpret tests, develop treatment plans and prescribe medications in all 50 states ― yet outdated state laws stand in the way.

Forty percent of states authorize full practice authority (FPA) for NPs, ensuring patients full and direct access to NP care. The remaining states limit NPs from practicing to the top of their education and training.

NPs can meet the demand for high-quality primary care nationwide. It’s time the remaining states update their laws so that all patients can access the care they deserve.

― Sophia L. Thomas, president of the American Association of Nurse Practitioners, Austin, Texas

The Plus Side Of 3D Mammograms

As a clinical researcher and diagnostic radiologist who reads thousands of mammograms each year, I was dismayed to read the KHN investigation “A Million-Dollar Marketing Juggernaut Pushes 3D Mammograms” (Oct. 22), which stated “there’s no evidence they are more effective than traditional screenings.” Hundreds of peer-reviewed scientific articles substantiate improved recall rates and cancer detection rates associated with 3D mammography. This article fails to present this information to readers and causes significant confusion in patients and physicians nationwide.

Recalls ― or “callbacks” — from screening mammography impose a tremendous psychosocial and economic burden on patients. Not only do patients and their families experience fear and anxiety due to a potential cancer diagnosis, but recalls also lead to downstream noncompliance with future screening recommendations and, on average, a 13-month delay to returning to screening mammography. Experiencing a recall or false positive increases the risk of late-stage diagnosis, when breast cancers are larger and harder to treat.

The experience of radiologists reading thousands of mammograms is not anecdotal. It is rooted in evidence-based medicine and data. These are not my opinions, they are facts.

― Dr. Nila H. Alsheik, chair of breast imaging, Advocate Aurora Health Care, Chicago

How High Is High?

The article “Employers Are Scaling Back Their Dependence On High-Deductible Health Plans” (Oct. 29) did not provide enough detail to confirm whether the cost to the employer of the PPO options was the same, more or less than the cost of the “high”-deductible health option. For example, it wasn’t clear whether the employer was making a contribution to the Health Savings Account or Health Reimbursement Account for the high-deductible health option.

Assuming the PPOs and the high-deductible health option all use an 80%-20% coinsurance formula after the deductible up to the same out-of-pocket expense maximum, the employee contributions you quoted give the appearance that the PPO options are much more attractive to almost every employee. For that result to occur, the cost to the employer for the PPO options would have to be substantially greater than the cost to the employer of the high-deductible health option.

― Jack Towarnicky, Powell, Ohio

from Updates By Dina https://khn.org/news/readers-tweeters-letters-to-editor-uva-doctors-outraged-over-their-health-systems-billing-practices/

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sharonelypearson · 5 years

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Two months ago I was in the midst of a pilgrimage to the Holy Land with thirty others from the Episcopal Church in Connecticut. It has taken me that long to articulate in writing my reactions and feelings about the political climate regarding Israel and Palestine. I have already posted numerous reflections on the sites we visited, both spiritually and historically. But I have skirted around writing about the reality of the Palestinian people that I experienced; it was just below the surface in all my postings about Bethlehem, Jerusalem, Samaria, and Galilee.

In the Hebrew Scriptures, Israel is called to be a light to the nations. As a people chosen by God (technically, Abraham received this promise for all his descendants/offspring) to show the way back to right relationship to God, today’s Israel has fallen short of this covenant. Power and rule have a tendency to let leaders forget their responsibilities, which ultimately leads to division and corruption. As in Old Testament times, history continues to repeat itself. Recall the role of the prophets who kept calling God’s people back.

This past Sunday’s readings (10th Sunday after Pentecost, Proper 15) spoke to me (with help from a great sermon which I will link here when it is posted) from Isaiah 5:1-7 and Luke 12:49-56. Israel continues to this day to grow (be) the wild (sour) grapes, while God gave all of us a beautiful vineyard to live in to grow sweet grapes – if we would only cease our divisions and love God as well as love our neighbor. God is angry. Jesus weeps. Yesterday and today.

The U.S. and Israel have a complicated relationship, which was exacerbated this past week with the on-again, off-again visits of two U.S. congress women desiring to visit family in the West Bank. You can read about it here (from NPR) as well as many other news sources. These two women know what it is like for the Palestinians (Muslim and Christian) to live in the occupied territories. I don’t believe most Americans really understand what is really happening in Israel, or how the U.S. government is upsetting the precarious balance. You have to see it to really understand.

For those who are not familiar with the history of Israel in modern times, here is a short video that gives a good overview with a summary of modern-day events that continue to impact the region today:

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I knew the political situation was complicated with Israeli control in disputed territories. I had heard about Palestinians throwing rocks at Israeli forces, walls being built, and settlements springing up. The settlements look like Co-op City if you’ve ever been to New York City – very permanent. And they are huge “suburbs”, located at the top of hills surrounding Palestinian villages below with access to highways that the villages do not have. It’s not hard to imagine their purpose – despite U.N. resolutions – to surround (and in the future be connected to one another?) small Palestinian towns. Meeting local people and experiencing the conditions in the West Bank, as well as traveling in and out of the State of Israel through check-points, changed me more than any of the biblical sites we visited. In sharing my pilgrimage stories with others, I came to realize that our ECCT pilgrimage was different from many other church-sponsored trips; we went beyond the holy sites and met the people: Jews, Christians, and Muslims – Arabs of the three Abrahamic faiths who call (and claim) Israel their home.

Security and Safety

It depends on who you might meet or talk to that makes you feel safe or secure in an occupied land. I should have realized things were not going to be “normal” on my Delta flight from JFK to Tel Aviv. We had to go through extra security at the gate before boarding the plane in New York: carry-on and backpacks through X-ray, water bottles (even just purchased) discarded, and personal scans (pat-downs for some in another room). As we approached Israeli airspace, we were told that all must remain seated for the duration of the flight (between 30-45 minutes). What other country demands this? Upon arrival, several fellow pilgrims were detained for three hours at Ben Gurion Airport. Welcome to Israel! (And they don’t make it easy for you to leave, either. That story’s even worse.) For many, being a “foreigner” in Israel means intimidation and humiliation. An August 17, 2019 op-ed from the Wall Street Journal describes this reality, which I also experienced when entering Israel from the United States as well as when we re-entered after visiting Petra (in Jordan) for a few days. And we didn’t have a deck of cards to idle away our hours of waiting.

Here’s what you don’t see or hear on the news. These occurrences aren’t in remote areas or terrorist neighborhoods. On one of our first mornings walking to the Old City we were held up on a sidewalk for a brief time, only to hear an explosion and learn that a “suspicious” package was blown up on the sidewalk ahead of us. Our Arab Palestinian Christian guide: “Not to worry. This happens all the time.”

Traveling by bus within Jerusalem and areas to and from the West Bank, Samaria, Galilee, and Jordan one can’t help but see the barbed wire, walls, fences, security check-points, and the proliferation of police/army (they looked the same) carrying automatic, assault rifles (the ones you see carried by those who commit mass-shootings in the U.S.). Our bus was boarded at check points several times by armed security with mirrors looking under the bus carriage while the luggage compartments were opened and examined. There is nothing as unsettling as watching a 20-something walk down the aisle of your bus to look at your passport while holding an AK-47. Armed Israelis escorting Jews (despite Israeli signage that Jews should not enter) around the Temple Mount (Al-Haram ash-Sharif) where the Dome of the Rock mosque is located. Israeli security is “in your face” at every turn.

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Bethlehem is surrounded by 25-feet walls of concrete with armed guards in towers (reminiscent of high security prisons in the U.S). Pilgrims go to visit the place of Jesus’ birth. Do they visit the surrounding neighborhood? Pictures tell it all.

Identity, Water, and Human Rights

On three evenings, different speakers came to share their perspectives with us and answer our questions. A Muslim professor from Hebrew University. Two Muslim young adults who are graduates of “Jerusalem Peacebuilders” (see more about this organization below). An Israeli professor (who was from the U.S. and had lived in a town next to mine it turns out). Our guides were Christians, living in Jerusalem with special status to travel freely. (License plates are color coded to determine who can leave any of the occupied territories. All of them spoke of their identity. “I am an Arab Palestinian Muslim.“ “I am an Arab Palestinian Christian.” I am an Israeli.” The similarities: most were Arabs who cared for their homeland; all were articulate; ethnicity and nationality came first when describing themselves. Differences: Israelis are free and have choices. Palestinians cannot have passports (with some exceptions); if they leave (for an education) outside Israel they give up the right to return if they are gone more than six years; they pay taxes but have no right to vote; they have no citizenship and are “without a country”; they must go through different check-points to travel and (for example) can only get mail at a post-office (which is not close to where they live and often beyond the check-points). The exceptions and hardships go on and on.

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But the one that stands out is water: you can tell where Palestinians live by the rooftops – they have water collectors to save what little rainwater there is; the Israeli government rations their water. Trash is everywhere – there is no waste collection, let alone recycling. Lands (and settlements) of Israelis are green in this desert land; Palestinian lands have difficulty growing crops. Remember that vineyard from the reading above in Isaiah? There is a reason why vineyards and grapes are important in the biblical stories. Wine was essential in this land in ancient times because the water was not safe to drink. In some ways, wine was life. Just as like today – water equals life. Without water, no matter where you are in the world, humans will not survive.

When visiting an Arab Palestinian Christian brewery, one of the owners (an American-educated woman) shared that sometimes she doesn’t take a shower for two weeks in order to save water for the business. How does one make beer or wine without water? Read more about Taybeh Brewery for their remarkable story and resilience.

The village of Taybeh (tie-bay), the only remaining Christian village in Israel, is 19 miles northeast of Jerusalem and 7.5 miles northeast of Ramallah. From its elevated site between biblical Samaria and Judea, it overlooks the desert wilderness, the Jordan Valley, Jericho and the Dead Sea. Living amidst Muslim villages, Israeli settlements, and military roadblocks, Taybeh’s inhabitants (numbering 1,300 in 2010) are intensely proud of their Christian heritage. While in the area we stopped for lunch where the Christian proprietor sold peace lamps.

As one who has travelled to the Holy Land, I believe it’s my responsibility to share my view, as I don’t believe we hear the real story, especially with the current administration’s lopsided stand toward Israel. I commend to you this article from Sojourners that speaks to the truth so many Holy Land pilgrims never experience. I am thankful that Qumri Pilgrimages allowed us to visit (by our request) more than just the holy sites.

With his permission, I share my husband John’s reflection that he wrote for the ECCT pilgrimage:

As we drive through the West Bank, viewing the litter and junked cars, I hear a constant buzz of conversation about things that could be done: a recycling program for all the single use plastic, sheet metal recovery, etc. Based on what I have seen, if I were a Palestinian I wouldn’t give any material effort to make things appear better. They are essentially prisoners in their own land. Israelis are taking over all the prime property in the occupied territories under the premise that God said that this was their place in the world. As I think about this I am reminded of lyrics from a song sung by Jackson Browne:

Walls and Doors Ever since the world existed There is one thing that is certain There are those that build walls And those who open doors. That’s how it’s always been And I know you know it There can be freedom only When nobody owns it.

I feel that the risk of other countries being perceived as anti-Semitic is being used very cleverly by the State of Israel. If we speak out against the injustices being done to Palestinians by Israel’s government, we would be against the Jewish faith and people. Can it be that the Holocaust suffering is being indirectly used as a political tool? I hope not…

Hope

Despite the despair felt in seeing the effects of the Israeli occupation, there were also glimpses of hope. The Episcopal Diocese of Jerusalem supports numerous programs, hospitals, and schools for Jews, Muslims, and Christians throughout Israel in the occupied territories. We visited the Jerusalem Princess Basma Centre in the West Bank and saw the ministry at work, serving children with disabilities in Palestine and training their parents to continue their education and training at home. A charitable, non-governmental, non-profit institution entrusted under the Anglican Episcopal church, their work is guided by the fundamental values expressed in the UN Conventions on the Rights of the Child and the Rights of Persons with Disabilities. While there we also visited a small handicrafts workshop known as “The Sheltered Workshop” that serves people suffering from physical, mental, and cognitive disabilities from Jerusalem and its surroundings

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As mentioned above, one evening we met with two young adults who are alumni of Jerusalem Peacebuilders (JPB) Along with Executive Director and founder Nicholas Porter (an Episcopal priest from Vermont (formerly Connecticut), we heard about the work and mission of this organization. From their website description, “JPB is an interfaith, non-profit organization with a mission to create a better future for humanity across religions, cultures, and nationalities. Integral to that mission is the belief that the future of Jerusalem is the future of the world. To that end, JPB promotes transformational, person-to-person encounters among the peoples of Jerusalem, the United States, and the Holy Land.” In addition to programs offered in Jerusalem, there are active summer institutes in Connecticut, Vermont, and Texas.

Each of these organizations are living out the promise given to Abraham and his descendants and the mandate given by Jesus. They are in relationship with their neighbor – Jew, Muslim, Christian – and in relationship with God, each following their own faith tradition. It is possible to share one land and be a light to the world. It is possible to plant and harvest good grapes. But it takes a village to do so that welcomes all. No walls. No barbed wire. No check-points. Free flowing water and roads open to all.

Hope and peace will prevail in the Holy Land if we bring all faiths together to learn that we are all humans who worship the same God. We do have differences that run deep and are polarizing, but we have so much more in common. The future of our world may depend on it. A third intifada is just around the corner if all sides don’t begin to come to the table with an open mind. Hopefully, graduates of Jerusalem Peacebuilders will be among those called to new leadership in the governments of Israel as well as the Palestinian Authority and families who are raising special needs children recognized that all are God’s children.

The peace lamps from Taybeh.

Read more reflections from the Episcopal Church in Connecticut pilgrims in Part 1 and Part 2. Learn about the work of the Episcopal Diocese of Jerusalem and American Friends of of the Episcopal Diocese of Jerusalem.

Pilgrimage Reflections: Walls & Doors Two months ago I was in the midst of a pilgrimage to the Holy Land with thirty others from the Episcopal Church in Connecticut.

#Holy Land #Israel #Israeli settlements #Jerusalem #Jerusalem Peacebuilders #Palestine #Palestinian Occupation #pilgrimage #Princess Basma Centre

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jonboudposts · 7 years

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General Election: Article 1

On Tuesday 18 April, a couple of hours after I woke up feeling very sick, acting Prime Minister Teresa May announced a General Election to take place on 9 June 2017. This was a break from her original plan to wait until 2020 ‘for stability’ and as ever the media went mental to cover the same bit of news over and over, while speculating about why she had chosen this line.

As ever, most of the media coverage was worthless but journalist Paul Mason listed what this election will really be about; in a video from outside Parliament:

“This will be about Brexit” and make no mistake dear reader (if you are a British citizen and eligible to vote; otherwise make as many mistakes as you like), this General Election will be the most important for years, decades even. In short, here is some of what is at stake:

A hard Brexit and all the damage that will do to people’s lives and opportunities

Pay cuts and freezes

Never-ending austerity

Britain turning into a low wage tax haven

Pricing the majority out of education

The housing crisis continuing and putting the vast amount of people out of affordable housing indefinitely

The country that so many of you claim to love will be handed to, in Mason’s word ‘a clique of super-rich sleaze merchants’ who have no democratic accountability. I would argue the ‘handing over’ part of this process may be behind us, but I certainly agree with his analysis. He finishes with ‘turkeys do not vote for Christmas’. I hope he is right but frankly the British public have proven themselves to be turkeys on many occasions and especially when a real choice of direction is on offer, many shit their pants and revert to the position of failure they are very comfortable with.

Nationally, if this government are elected into office they will continue all the above along with privatisation of the NHS and deconstruction of the body politic for working people, with no chance to ever affectively hold them to account. The government are blowing the economy and the rest of us will pay for it; mainly in the form of lowering working standards and benefits, some of which we know have been deadly.

We will probably never gain answers to why this election is taking place, nor any serious questions on policy is or would really mean in practice. Public appearances by the Prime Minister so far have been few and not open to the public, while her interviews have been visually and verbally uncomfortable affairs where she repeats catchphrases of party political doctrine (because sadly this works) and shows how little she understands everyday factors of many people’s lives, such as visiting food banks for those in work.

Now, it is important to understand the way all this will all happen. Those of us brought up on very good drama programmes and event films might expect a sudden shock or bomb drop but the apocalypse works very slowly, in little everyday ways that you would probably not notice until suddenly you find the buses in your village, town or even parts of the city have been cancelled or your fixed term work contract has been changed over night to a zero hours one (to use a couple of heavy examples).

By voting against the Tories at the General Election, you can stop all of this and embrace a progressive agenda going forward. I know that progressive agenda is a bit of a buzz phase so let me explain what I mean by that:

Addressing the terrible pay and condition for most working people in Britain today, including workers vital services and securing those services

Addressing and fixing the housing crisis

Making any Brexit deal conditional on the people of Britain getting what they need, not what suits the richest

Repealing the anti-trade union legislation presently helping to prevent progress

The Conservative government have serious plans for the reduction of rights of working people in the working and middle class and they want a mandate to make it easier, particularly when leaving the European Union. If you vote them into power, this is what will happen. They may have already achieved much of this, but in my view it is never too late to fight back and go forward with your own vision of a better world for yourself and others.

Pay attention to the policies and what is said by whom and do not forget who you are as you walk into the voting booth. While our media and many witless personalities (some serving Labour MPs) whack on about how terrible Jeremy Corbyn is, his policies are becoming more popular, such as raising the minimum wage and stopping tax breaks that only benefit the rich. He has spoken about carers’ allowance rising too, along with free school meals at primary level and re-nationalising the railways.

These are policies for people not corporations and this is the way forward; the way the Tories want to take us is only negative and destructive for the majority of us.

I have talked for some time about the culture war in this country and now the mainstream often use the term (although they are less specific about what they mean by it). I will go into more detail in later articles (if you can bear to wait) but it does seem a very definite factor front and centre to this General Election.

However, we must not imagine that this election will take place only around national issues or Britain’s relationship to Europe. Internationalism will be a factor, whether you like it or not.

Jeremy Corbyn is a threat to the status quo in many ways, not least his support for Palestinian rights, criticism of Britain’s relationship with Saudi Arabia (and associated arms sales) and opposition to Donald Trump, meaning he has the audacity to disagree with America over something. This will be the basis of serious attacks against him, even if to many people on the ground around the UK it means little to their lives. The Conservative response to all this is again to roll out professional buffoon Boris Johnson to sling weak personal insults before telling us another Middle East war would be joined by Britain if the US asked, as it would seem rude not to participate.

The Conservatives have nothing to do with the working class and never really did. This election, there is no way to deny that any more. Teresa May and her cabinet want to turn Britain into a low-wage tax haven, privatise the NHS and make sure working people – working or middle class – have no security. Any working person or progressively-minded person who votes Conservative is cucking themselves and their family if they have one. This General Election will be the first in my lifetime with a real choice between candidates and outcomes. For anyone in work, this is a vital election, including many of the self-employed who have suffered a dislocation of their own.

Politics is not the problem in Britain, it is culture. This is where ultimately the work needs to be done, as culture feeds into politics. Ask yourself if some sense of national belonging brought by concepts like patriotism is more important than a working future for their family. In other words, do you love your country more than your children?

With the Conservatives in government, we have seen austerity, the rise of insecure work, a housing crisis and the biggest stagnation in wages in my lifetime (and longer); in the Labour Party leadership, you have a leader who has pledged to tackle all these things and other injustices – but Jeremy Corbyn does not sing the national anthem. If you think this point is more important than the list of terrible living conditions above, I have no way of connecting with you. I suspect you may need to do a bit of explaining to you kids when they start work too, in an environment where every minute of their time is monitored, they have no security, will be living in your box room for a couple of decades (at least) of adult life and good qualities for workers will be a strong bladder and no voice.

Teresa May will continue to hide during the election campaign, just like she did during the Referendum. She will hope everyone will buy her strong and stable argument while her media allies pour one bullshit story after another weak opinion in regards the opposition; then along will come St Teresa to save the day for dear old England with more punishment for the poor a disastrous Brexit for which she will attempt to compensate with trade deals with the world’s most deplorable people. Choose a future, not a glamorised past.

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ncealevel2-blog · 7 years

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Q&A about PA real estate laws

Q: I need to own an ex boyfriends name removed from my houses deed. Is this expensive? Can I do it myself? Thank you

Attorney Answer Mark Scoblionko

A: You need to have legal counsel prepare a deed for you as well as your ex to sign. That will probably cost in the scope of $250.00, plus or minus. However, if there is a mortgage, the attorney will have to negotiate together with the bank to get its permission to release your ex and prepare a Release from the mortgage. That will cost several hundred dollars more. If he is on a participant in the loan and the Note, you are going to likely have to re-finance, purchase new title insurance, etc. There will additionally be a 2% transfer tax on the interest, which will be half the worth of the home of your ex. In summary, this can be a pretty big deal and you will need an attorney to allow you to get through it.

Q: Just how do I transfer the deed to my name from my deceased grandparents?

All my grandparent 's children, including my dad, are deceased. A distant cousin has been taking care of the property and wants to eliminate it. He approached several times to me and asked if I would really like to possess it. If I decided to take the home, what would I need to do? The home is found in Philadelphia. Attorney Answer Mark Scoblionko

A: This is, sadly, a complex issue. Title could have passed to the remaining grandparent by right of survivorship in case the deed is in the names of both grandparents. An estate would finally need to be opened for the living grandparent. The Will would need to be followed, if there is a Will. Otherwise, you may be named Administrator. The following question is if any of your aunts or uncles or your dad survived the living grandparent or if they all pre both grandparents. The property would have passed to all those survivors, unless there clearly was a Will which gives otherwise, if any lived. Estates would have to be opened for all of these. The cycle then repeats itself. If there were Wills, they'd have to be followed. If there were not, the property would pass to your siblings, you and any cousins that are children of survivors. This really is a time consuming and quite expensive process and you'll need certainly to consult a lawyer to get through it. There'll be taxes estate prices and legal fees.

Q: If you have potential buyers for a home before signing with a realtor, can they be excluded from the listing contract?

The home is in Pennsylvania. I have been told this exclusion is no longer permitted in listing contracts in this state. Lawyer Answer Peter Munsing

A: I believe you can have them excluded. It's a contract--you can put different things in there. There have to be certain disclosures, but don't see why you can't exclude them.

Q: My mum and I are on a deed as Joint tenants with survivorship. If I 'm the survivor, can a will override the title?

She does not reside here and we had a falling out and she actually is making a variety of threats that she is gonna charge me and take me off the deed rent, etc. I might just like to understand what my rights/options are regarding this issue. Thanks. Attorney Answer Dr Kenneth V Zichi J.D.

A: A Will cannot override a title. Yet, either joint owner can file an action for partition to divide the possession of the property. The consequence of that could be to convert the property from a joint tenancy into a tenancy in common. At that point a sale could be ordered by a court. Further, she's eligible for let at half the the reasonable rental value, and each one of you is in charge of half the taxes and costs of repairs and public utilities, etc. You'll need a lawyer to sort this through.

Q: How do you remove someone of a house deed who has never paid for, or lived in the property in question?

My grandmother owns her home, but her daughter is on the deed. Has been for many years, and it is still unclear as to how she ended up on the deed. I would like some help on what steps we need to make to take her name off the deed. Lawyer Answer Dr Kenneth V Zichi J.D.

A: Without seeing the paperwork it is impossible to say for sure what should be done here. Is this 'joint' ownership? 'tenants in common'? a 'ladybird' deed? Each results in a different answer of what to do next, and it is not always OBVIOUS what the form of 'having her name on it' things are without reviewing the whole deed. I'd strongly urge your grandmother to seek out a local real estate lawyer to review things, and explain to her what needs to be done to change things. WORST case scenario may be her daughter needs to sign off on the deed. She really does need to seek out a local lawyer to review this!

Q: Is there any strategy to get rid of a restricted life estate clause from a title minus the individual consenting to take it out?

My boyfriend and that I purchased our house from my boyfriend's parents. Just MY name is around the Mortgage. Before the sale, we discussed them living in the house with us. We spoke to some lawyer (who also owned the title business doing the closing), he explained he was planning to draft papers concerning the terms of them dwelling with us. Yet, during closing, the title representative didn't bring any additional papers, she "hand wrote in" a small life estate clause into the deed. She never clarified what it meant for us or what the risks were. After the closing, we questioned why it had been done this manner, and all she said was "do not worry it can always be taken out after". She said we needed to sign the next copy at the same time, which we did and then retyped the title. It's now two years after, our living arrangement is not working out and we'd like to be aware of whether there is any way to really have it "taken out" like the title representative said, without his parents needing to agree? Attorney Answer Mark Scoblionko

A: It makes no sense that the title would be in the names of both you and your boyfriend even though it's not useful for your question, but the mortgage is only in your name. For a mortgage to be valid, it has to be performed by everyone whose names are about the title. It is possible for the note that accompanied the mortgage to be entirely in your name, even if both names are contained by the mortgage, if you were the lone borrower for the trade. Perhaps the note and mortgage are confusing. With respect to your question, it may be replied if the record is really reviewed by a lawyer. Yet, as a broad proposal, unless the deed provides that the life estate is revocable, you'd require the approval and participation of your boyfriend's parents to revoke it.

Q: If a horse boarder invests a large amount of money into building tack lockers in a barn, do they must be left for legal reasons?

The tack lockers were constructed, and fastened into the wall in a boarding facility with the verbal understanding that the owner of the house would pay for stuff. Of course now he maintains he never said that. He maintains that if they try to take them down when leaving which they are now section of the property, and he will be calling the state police. There currently isn't any written boarding deal. Lawyer Response Ben F Meek III

A: Get an attorney. Ask him about filing a mechanic & materialmen's lien on the house. Take all your receipts for stuff. You need to file suit for breach of contract and fraud around the exact same time. Best of luck.

Q: Can my family set a time limit on obtaining a mortgage for an estate, though I'm actively looking for one?

I've lived in the house 8 yrs and was paying my mom weekly rent. She passed away in July 2016 and the executor (sister) needs evidence of mortgage by March 1, 2017. I'm actively looking for a mortgage but credit score is 9 points to low and might need additional time to obtain, couple months at most. I have also been paying all expenses to maintain the house since her passing. Attorney Answer Peter Munsing

A: The administrator can ask -- in case you are considered among the beneficiaries, a lot depends on.

Source

Q: Can i sell the property i bought at a private tax sale to one of the orignal owners kids who wants to live there

Lawyer Answer Dr Kenneth V Zichi J.D.

A: IF you own the property you can sell it to any adult you want to. You mention a PRIVATE tax sale however. To my knowledge there is no such thing. Taxes are owed to the government, and the government cannot sell its tax lien 'in private'.... Do you really own the property? Have you simply bought some sort of lien? I'd show the paperwork to a local licensed attorney to determine what you own before you try to sell it!

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