#i may be a bit manic

[heymacy]

IAN GALLAGHER + his journey with bipolar disorder

╰┈➤ “At times, being bipolar can be an all-consuming challenge, requiring a lot of stamina and even more courage, so if you’re living with this illness and functioning at all, it’s something to be proud of, not ashamed of." - Carrie Fisher

#happy world bipolar day to all my bp babies #(more thoughts at the end of the tags) #shameless #shamelessnet #shamelessedit #ian gallagher #cameron monaghan #*macygifs #bipolar disorder #hello pals how are we doin #i made this gif set in july of 2023 and never posted it because 1) i was terrified to share it and potentially see Bad Takes in the tags #and 2) because my hyperfixation was waning. and while both of those things are still mostly true (the fixation comes and goes) #i feel like it's really important to share as ian's bipolar storyline was not only so vital to his character it was a bit of representation #that isn't often given to the disorder and those (like myself) who live with it every single day #world bipolar day is a day where we can both celebrate ourselves and our resilience and also raise awareness of the reality of the disorder #which is both terrifying and beautiful at its core. this disease is not a death sentence or a sentence to an unfulfilled and miserable life #while there are challenges galore when it comes to balancing life with this disorder it IS possible to live a full and productive life #and i think it's really important to have representation of that in media - and while shameless dropped the ball on a LOT of storylines #over the years THIS is the one they really fucking nailed and i am incredibly grateful #i first started watching shameless while in the midst of a major depressive episode and i was later (finally) diagnosed during an extended #hypo/manic episode - this show and ian's storyline got me through so much and made me feel so seen and validated in my struggles #world bipolar day is also vincent van gogh's birthday (happy birthday buddy) who was posthumously diagnosed with bipolar disorder #and who experienced both depressive and hypo/manic episodes during his lifetime (and was regularly institutionalized) #it takes a lot of help and support to keep us going. it takes the support of our family and friends and *most* of all #it takes patience and kindness and understanding - which is so so so easy to give if you are willing to love and listen #so please. be willing. listen to our stories. be patient with us. show us love without conditions. support us in any way you can. #we are worth it #i promise #anyway. that's really all i wanted to say. happy world bipolar day to those who celebrate (me) and may all of us living with this disorder #go on to live happy fulfilling beautiful magical lives

[melit0n]

I think the best way to describe how I feel about Vessel is that I want to chew on his arm like a dog to a bone

#I'm hoping to hit my target audience otherwise I might look a little manic lol #also would quite like a soul crushing hug where I can rest my head in the crook of his shoulder and be hummed to sleep #maybe carried around in his pocket or something #(I think the yearning may be getting to me a bit) #sleep token #st #vessel #vessel sleep token #vessel singer #mel's rambles

[spinningthehamsterwheel]

I am so mad

I've seen other people say it. Fairly often, even. But I always figured they were outliers; that that sort of thing would never work for me.

But

I finally got a proper ADHD medication. And let me tell you, I am so goddamn mad. I've spent my entire life thinking I was "lazy", that I should be pathetically grateful for anyone who employed me or put up with my inability to do housework. Being TOLD I was lazy for it (though never by my lovely partner, gods bless her). But let me tell you... someone with a properly-working Executive Function doesn't know SHIT about how debilitating ADHD is.

I can clean. I can plan. I can work on a task without constantly longing to just sit down at my computer. I can look at things I've been avoiding for months or even years, and they no longer seem impossible. I can see a dozen tasks that need doing and just... pick one and go do it. I can't believe this is how neurotypical peoples' minds work, but it sure explains a lot.

ADHD is a true capital-D Disability. You're not lazy for it, you just don't have the same tools as everyone else.

#ADHD #mental illness #medication #I can even properly tag posts! #truly the most difficult task #Also I know getting ADHD treated is hard #I am so very lucky to have found a good doctor #I may also be a bit manic at the moment

[thezoneoftruth]

anthony made up for the lack of darryl & glenn moments in season one with this linc & taylor car chase (?) the only person having more fun with it than me is will campos

#i was scream laughing throughout the entire bit and hearing will die laughing boosted my serotonin to manic levels #shut up about dungeons and daddies may #dndads

[effervescentdragon]

okay turns out that in my victorian class, i am absolutely not the stupid one, i just literally didnt do the reading. now that i did, basically everyone else is stupid istg

#how hard is it to grasp the voncept of non human agency #yall shouldve read some philosophy instead of whatever gen z does istg #i may be a bit hyped and a bit manic #effervescentdragonrants

[orcelito]

Decided this is the last week of my current character arc. I'm going to get that fucking cartilage piercing soon.

#speculation nation #i might call soon. not rn tho im at work #i just... want it. #impulsive Maybe except ive been thinking about it for well over a year #and im. i dont know. i need something to change. #half tempted to just shave my hair off but ive been growing it out for a While. that's not what i want rn #or rather not what i want in general #a new piercing tho well that's Entirely fine with general me #i think i may be feeling a bit manic right now. but im just desperate for things to change. so. #too early for this actually. the memorial is this weekend. and hopefully it'll give me some closure. #but it's been 3 weeks now of this emotional hellhole and i just want my brain to Stop #and i think a piercing will be good for that. i need it.

[sylvaridreams]

I'm just like, sylvariposting today. <- I do this every day so whatever.

Anyway running with the "Lala overthrew the Pale Reavers and took off with a bunch of their young recruits to make his own army" idea... I love Lala, he's not "evil" but he is a manipulative person who'll twist others and charm them any way he can to get what he wants. He claims to be a firstborn, a secondborn, whatever he can get away with to posit himself as Higher and Better Than You, somehow. He couldn't do this working with Laranthir in the Pale Reavers because Laranthir knew that was all deceit. So he started scheming behind the true secondborn's back, charming young recruits who had joined the Reavers with hopes of doing good. Well we could do even more good together, you and I. 💚 Just us together. 💚 And eventually he had so many Reavers on his side, he was able to say hey, what do we need the Reavers for, let's go build our own organization over there! ^_^ who's with me! And led some huge chunk of the snipers away like the pied piper.

He has a tendency to flirt to get what he wants. And he's genuinely charming about it, and other sylvari (saplings especially) fall for it and believe that he’s genuinely interested in them specifically, that he only has eyes for them, that he means it when he refers to them as dearheart. Naturally he has zero interest in them. Any of them. But it's so quick and easy to get them in line and doing as he bids when they all believe that he's in love with them too.

(Lychen is immune to his charms. Zero interest. He'll smack Lala to get him to stop when he's coming on too strong to a recruit. "You have to stop flirting with all the new recruits, sir. They're starting to get jealous." "What's to be jealous about!" "Two of the new snipers got in an argument over which was your dearheart, and three others overheard and joined in." "Well they're all my precious dearhearts." "Stop that.")

I'm figuring out right now what Lala and Eldulis' history together is. Eldulis is a genuine secondborn. At some point I feel he was a valiant. Lacrimosen a couple of generations later was maybe a fellow valiant. Maybe Eludlis was his mentor... I think during this time he would have been questioning the validity of the Dream, the Grove, the Pale Tree... all of it starting to look so fake and forced. He was disillusioned with his own Wyld Hunt and wasn't getting any answers from the Firstborn or their mother. He'd confided in Trahearne first that he felt his Hunt wasn't attainable, and had gotten some kind of comforting non-guidance, which had pushed him towards talking to Faolain instead. Why are we doing all of this, sister? To what end does it serve? And she did have guidance, in the other direction. I think Eldulis would have tried to sway Lacrimosen before going fully to the Nightmare Court. Come with me. You have potential in you. Lacrimosen laughed in his face and told him he had no interest in organized cults. So now to this day there's this rift between them where they both think of the other as that fool who made the wrong choice and ended up in some stupid organization that I have no interest in. Were they to actually be forced to sit down and communicate I'm sure they'd be able to be somewhat honest about missing what they once had, when they were friends, but it's something they can never return to--there will only ever be animosity from Eldulis and aggressive flirtation from Lala.

#lacrimosen #eldulis #lychen #loreposting #sorry for posting so much i may be a bit manic #long post

[myriadsystem]

Its the end of pride month and i havent once seen the comic about that gay raccoon taking shots at his fox ex husband. Disgraceful

#personal #acnh #animal crossing #lgbtq+ #so sad it hasnt been on my dash this month #yes. i know hes a tanuki #*monokuma voice* IM NOT A TANUKI IM A BEAR! IM MONOKUMA! #well ive had zero hours of sleep so this post may be a bit rambly im gonna. stop #ugh im only awake now because i have a parcel being delivered that i need to sign for and dont wanna miss it #a parcel that came from my manic episode that they wont refund me for so btw if you wanted to help me out im in real need of finances rn #dm me or visit the support us link on browser to help out please i will be eternally grateful to you and if you cover the costs for me #help dig me out of this hole i put myself in i will do basically anything you ask and im not joking #good lord i hope the mail comes soon so i can fkn go to sleep 😮‍💨 my eyeballs hurt

[delphi-dreamin]

Somebody tell me to pause Netflix and do dishes so I can eat. 

#I need to eat something #but I have to do dishes first #but to do that i need to pause netflix and put the computer down #halp #i may be a bit manic atm

[personalzombie-tv]

Good morning welcome to me mentally six-degrees-of-kevin-bacon-ing my way into the most complicated multiversal clusterfuck the mcyt-verse has ever seen! The best part is I don't even have to use MCC that much because TUBBO IS A RAT!

Between Scott smajor being in half the series I watch now and Martyn inthelittlewood being an og who still works with the Yogs it's not even that hard! Almost everyone else I can tie through the six million creators that touched the DreamSMP that happened to do other things in Minecraft ever

#mcyt #its all connected #i can draw a line from simon honeydew yogscast to philza minecraft and its not even a LONG ONE #i never got into half the series im making lines through i just know they exist #i only got two hours of sleep i may be a bit manic this morning

[uniquezombiedestiny]

what. the FUCK is going on with my brain today 👁_👁

#im like 80-90% sure i had a manic. thing ig #and now i think im in a more depressive one #its noticeable but not like. impairing #really none of my disorders are tbh theyve always been chill somehow #i have no idea what i have yet or if i have anything but theres no fucking waaaaay this is the sleep deprivation from 1-2 days ago #<- actually 2 days ago (stayed up all night day 1 #[i forgot i cant use commas oops] and slept at night on day 2) #whats weird to me though is that the manic thing only lasted like a few hours #and i assume this part will too #idk of thats normal or of its supposed to be longer #if* #oh and a 2nd weird thing - did a tiny bit of research so far #it said some symptoms of bipolar 1 and that its usually longer and i just. suddenly felt like crying/really sad over it??????? #calmed down and just left google tho lol and went here #since ive told noone about it yet #so.... yeah. oh and a semi related thing i think i may have ocd too #<- i will never get 2 brownies instead of 1 knowing i cant eat it all again #<- felt like they had to eat the 2nd one even tho it felt terrible to since i was full #so yeah our brain is. weird #oh also. 5s. like everywhere #i sorta. did actions/took steps in 5s at one point #and when i specifically put times in the microwave i end them with 5 #<- since i do that. pretty often #....and i have to have 25 tags on this now #which is easy bc i have enough to say to make it work B) -yesod

[phantom-of-the-keurig]

Sorry I keep changing my pfp besties I’m off my adderall

#adhd brain has fully taken over #I may be a bit manic idk #we will see #personal #october 2022

[devilisln-moved]

Though my thirst is yet to be slaked (please don’t bring out Matt in the last episode jfc I will be dust and bone by then), She-Hulk continues to be a delight. Honestly? All joking aside, I’m enjoying the ride and I really hope it continues to be this solid. The trailer did it no justice whatsoever (aside for maybe the last one before the first episode dropped but I am highly biased over the five whole seconds of Daredevil tease at the very end).

#uhhhh anyway I may have passed out for a wee nap after dinner #and honestly I have a bit of a head ache #so my hopes to get shit running here is very slim #but I'm proof reading my first few head canons on the doc I wrote mostly last night in a fit of manic inspiration lol #basically are they coherent? #or are they mad insomniac ravings? #I will be lurking tho #following people #and maaaaayyyybe reblogging some memes and cleaning out some of the ooc detritus #tbd #;ooc

[rouge-the-bat]

songs to DESTROY BITE KILL and COMMIT ARSON to

#this is for a lot of songs that itch my brain really good and it makes me lose my mind and want to fucking explode #I WANT TO SLAM MY HEAD THROUGH A WALL #OKAY I THOUGHT A LIL BIT I THINK I MAY BE A LITTLE MANIC RN BUT ITS GOOD IM FEELING GREAT #I WONG BE SLAMMING MY HEAD THROUGH A WALL BTW LMAO

[transboykirito]

my pc is not cooperating so i will attempt to finish this chapter of fwbb on my phone, and then i will post it as soon as the computer works <3

#my therapist said i need to be more aware and present in my emotions and i have now done that too much and am hyper aware of them #so i’ve been channeling that into sugu and kazuto angst instead lolsies #and random scenes from other shades of blue and oneshots with similar emotions #i fear i may have manic pixie dream girled a bit too close to the sun

[whimsidollie]

Girls im this [] close to joining random ass discords and the like just to get attention bc holy shit

#dollmaker speaks #More like Dollie loses her fucking mind #Slamming my head against a wall idc at this point all my friends are ignoring me and mh doc stopped me off on of my vital mental meds #So im a teensy tiny bit silly rn #Going a bit goofy #Usually im overly cautious #But ngl may just say fuck it #Will i get hit on my creepy middle aged men? Will i bag myself a creepy obsessive boy? Who knows!!! Well see!!! #Bipolar personality disorder #Mainly just tagging that bc this manic episode is Sponsored by the funky groovy bipolarism #My mom wants me to get to a point where im quote on quote healed enough to stop all my meds but jfc i dont think this shit will ever stop #Head in hands sobbing