#i just want my personal space back

[ruporas]

lonely

[ID: A limited palette of green and pink, Vashwood comic. The first page serves as a prologue. The first panel shows Vash speaking to someone off screen while Wolfwood is lingering behind him. A black arrow is drawn pointing at him. In the second panel, Vash is buying donuts in the distance while Wolfwood is once again in view, lingering. and the black arrow is drawn pointing at him. In the third panel, Vash is leaving a cubicle and turning towards his right with a slightly peeved expression. He sees Wolfwood, leaning against the cubicle, waiting for him, and with the black arrow drawn, pointing at him, implicating the consistent hovering of Wolfwood’s presence during Vash’s everyday. At the bottom of the page, they’re drawn out of panel with Vash turning to Wolfwood and saying with an irritated expression, “You’re really following me everywhere, huh?” Wolfwood responds, “What, you got a problem?” Vash responds without hesitation, “Yeah, kinda...”

The second page starts with a new day. In the first panel, Vash is seen alone, weighing apples in his hands at a mart, with crowds passing behind him. In the second panel, he turns to his right and starts to say, “Hey, Wolfwood...” In the third panel, he’s startled from seeing a stranger, whom he’d accidentally called out to when he was expecting to see Wolfwood. He says, “Oh, you’re not him. Sorry!” In the fourth panel, the stranger walks off and Vash muses, “Right, he said he had something to do today...”

The third page begins with a close up of Vash's miffed expression, the continuation of Vash's thoughts, "Now that he's not here, this is just like how I used to be, but... It feels lonely somehow. Oh well, I'll see him again tonight, like always." In the second panel, it shows Vash walking through the marketplace crowd, alone. In the third panel, the door panel is a close up of the door opening with a peek of Vash's head. He says, "Wolfwood!" In the fourth panel, Vash is holding a bag of food with a bright smile and says, "Are you hungry? I got you something to eat today!"

The fourth page begins with a shot of the room, two beds being highlighted, one of them being made properly with the blanket draped over the bed and the other with the blanket folded and pillow sitting on top of it. There's no sign of Wolfwood. The second panel shows Vash with a disappointed look as he thinks, "He's still not here?" The third panel shows Vash putting the bag of food on the table. Stapled to the paper bag is the receipt with a written note "For Wolfwood." Vash's thoughts continue "He does like to stay out so, I guess there's no reason to worry..." The fourth panel shows Vash sitting his bed somberly with his thoughts continued, "It's not any of my business anyway..."

The fifth page starts with a close up his blank expression as he looks downwards, thinking, "Even if he left completely... That'd be understandable and better for him. I'll just travel alone again... like before... Huh?" The next panel shows Vash's composure break, tears welling up in his eyes suddenly, as he didn't expect to cry. He starts to sob, putting his hands to his face to quiet himself and wipe at his tears, as he says, "Ugh... Dammit... I miss h..." The last panel shows Vash leaning over into his hands, still crying, and in the back, the door swings wide open with a bam as Wolfwood walks through with the punisher swung behind him. He shouts, "SPIKEY! You in here?!"

The sixth page starts with Wolfwood confused, looking at Vash and Vash looks back, just as confused, with tears in his eyes and snot out of his nose. Wolfwood starts saying, "Ah? You..." No longer in panels, at the bottom of the page, Wolfwood takes the Punisher off of himself and starts to walk towards Vash, continuing with slight concern, "What's wrong with you? Did something happen?" Vash, hurriedly begins to wipe at his tears, denying immediately, "No! No, I'm fine! Nothing happened!"

The seventh page, Vash points towards the table, with a hand still wiping at his tears and he smiles as he says, "I uh got you food. On the table." Wolfwood looks towards to the table and responds, "Oh. I was getting hungry, thanks." He turns his head back to Vash immediately after with an uncertain expression, knowing the other wasn't responding to his concern, and says, "But, I know you're an idiot with this stuff, so I'm reminding you again. Don't brush it off if it's an issue, alright?"

The eight page, Vash's tears have dried and he looks to Wolfwood with a soft smile and responds, "Yeah. It's okay though..." A panel at the center shows a side view of Vash approaching Wolfwood. At the bottom of the page, with no panel, is a close up shot of Vash's hand, holding onto the edge of Wolfwood's jacket sleeve, as he says, "Because you're here now. Wolfwood."

The final page is a back shot of both of them standing next to each other, Wolfwood's head tilted slightly to the left, not fully believing Vash as he says, "That doesn't answer anything, Spikey." Vash responds, "There's no need to talk about it! You should enjoy your food. Let's have a drink too?" Wolfwood responds, "Tsk, tsk. Fine, yeah. I could use one." END ID]

#vashwood #vash the stampede #nicholas d wolfwood #trigun #trigun maximum #but onto this comic... i think and talk a LOT about vash's loneliness bc trigun is just. kind of central on that for a good while! esp in #the original manga he was alone for a good portion of it and he tends to keep others away like how he ran away from meryl and milly when #they tried to tag along. and he was kind of bothered when he realized ww was following him around Too. at the core even though he loves #humans and he loves deeply the people he does know -- he isnt really much of a people person and i think thats been the case since he was #young considering his initial doubts towards humans... with the exception of kids bc kids dont give him moral conflicts. so suddenly #here comes wolfwood!!! his guide. someone TRULY affixed to him until he has to get to knives. someone who isnt budging and someone whos #really good at following him around and even seems like he goes like 5 steps ahead to make sure vash doesnt run on him #in one way its - i don't want you to follow me bc i don't want to burden you and i don't want you to kill the people i want to save. #in another way its - i like this companionship. i like waking up to you and i like ending the way with you. i like talking to someone who #knows my world. i like being in your space and sometimes i enjoy talking about our day #theyre just living together. like. roadtrip buddies or theyre also under the same roof because they're going everywhere together. #trimax they mainly spend their mornings together and if they had personal business attend the other person would usually know and itd only #be during the midday. anyway bc of this kind of companionship i figure that vash eventually grew accustom to it and he really. cant go back #to the kind of loneliness from before. it's harder to imagine and it'd be harder to withstand. esp after 2 years with lina and her grandma. #ruporas art

[mikimeiko]

The Expanse | Season 1 (2015-16), Mark Fergus and Hawk Ostby

#the expanse #theexpanseedit #aaaah i missed my space babies so much! #excellent first season #so much foreshadowing is unreal! #knowing what comes next most of this season felt like an introduction #also i realized how much i forgot and how far apart the season were from one another #and i can't wait to have a coherent idea of the whole show watching them back to back #tv 2024 #i made this #i just want a tag for the things i personally put out into the world

[weirdmageddon]

sorry for liking davejade in 2023 btw its in a cool way though

#hs #davejade #like that one person said bi4bi cool silly girl and her lame ass court jester bf who enjoy each others company a lot #“its boring” well not everything has to be conflict sometimes it can be two people really vibing #and being good foils to each other and just sort of being like a lock and key #i dont dislike davekat but i felt like they bickered too much which is Funny dont get me wrong #but i like davejade for different reasons #in that i feel like dave is at his most heartfelt with her #bc jade doesnt do anything to warrant snarkiness. she doesnt make him uncomfortable and that earns his trust like a lot #ppl say its boring cause its a mf ship and they dont get them like i do #and my answer to that as an agender person is who the fuck cares #i hate ppl dismissing mf ships out of hand like…hey bi ppl exist. and even if they were straight they still got a good dynamic #of care and interest towards each other #hes not her knight in shining armor bffr. she has uhhh fucking GUN #they are Equals #jade slaps the shit outta people on more than one occasion lol #they infodump to EACH OTHER and they both listen #remember when jade wanted to infodump to john about physics remember that #dave would eat that up like oh damn that so dope and tie it back to time or whatever. special relativity #since space and time are fundamentally related #sorry im running on fumes rn i didnt sleep last night #ALSO THEY HAVE MATCHING ALCHEMIZED OUTFITS #jade’s dead shuffle dress and dave’s four aces suited both use a midnight crew poster as ingredients #i should draw them together in that mspa style #maybe theyre not even romantic. who said ships had to be. its short for relationship #well theres multiple kinds of relationships. what if they were queerplatonic

[godblooded]

just an fyi, and it feels like it needs to be said here: your blog is your own space and you should be able to say whatever the fuck you want. if you’re sad? vent. get sad. maybe put it under a cut, definitely tag it, but get sad. if you feel like you need someone to talk to? drop a freaking message about how you’re feeling like you could use a buddy, or anything randomly engaging. if you’re having a hard time, you should feel safe and okay to talk about it in your own space. we’re writers and we’re people and while there’s a lot to be said for how engagement outside of oneself is necessary in rp (and really really needs to improve), i think there’s a lot that must be said about people reaching out to others. it’s become so solitary here — the whole ‘reblog from source’ thing when it comes to shit like about and musings is absurd. the whole refusing to like things is ridiculous. yes, curate your space, that’s important, but curating your space into a studio apartment only you live in doesn’t make this a community anymore, it makes it a studio apartment you live in.

just be yourself here. do whatever you want. but i’m always saying: remember you’re not alone, and don’t let yourself feel that way.

#ooc. o kaptain. #[this is illogically worded and after an argument I’m already upset but I just felt like this has to be put here. it’s been sitting on my #brain for so long and it’s something i just wanted to discuss. the way the rpc has become not even an echo chamber just… a shitty ny #apartment only one person lives in that can fit your fridge and your bedroom in the same room. the way literal fandoms have divided each #other through nothing but massive senses of entitlement and so much gatekeepy fucking language. it’s exhausting to watch this happen #literally all because i have no idea where interaction went and yes I’ve been virtually inactive for months now but. it absolutely isn’t for #lack of trying to come back. it’s hugely due to a lack of interaction whenever I reach out and then the feeling like I’m being either #entertained or dismissed. this is a social space and we’re people and everybody just needs to recognize that. like. last week my introverted #broski started discussing how as he’s older he feels loneliness more tangibly but he hates people and i looked right at him and said …yeah #dude. that’s natural. we’re humans. we need each other to live. we need spaces we create and communities we make. but like. there need to be #interactive people in those spaces. we’re social creatures. i love you guys and this is a ramble but… it’s been on my mind awhile. and #frankly? feels kinda good to finally speak my mind.]

[dollopheadsandclotpoles]

I Can’t Believe They Did That™: Merlin Edition

Welcome to the contest to see which insane moment per season is THE most insane moment. After voting per season (with a special poll just for deleted scenes), the winner of each round will face up against each other in one final death round. Let the games begin

#BBC Merlin #merlin #my polls #it was hard to narrow down cause there are so many but some I removed because I was personally just salty about them #like Arthur stepping on merlin to get on his horse?? tf was that!?!? #the way they expect us to believe the same arthur who would stand on merlin's back to get on his horse #would also be like #'my new step-mother thinks you stole something of hers and idec if it's true I want you to run away before they catch you' #and 'I'm not arresting you for trying to attack the witchfinder i'm breaking the law to let you see Gaius' #like COME ON #or Merlin straight up planning on leaving Camelot with Freya and not telling Arthur about it #I also had to get rid of #Ending the Freya episode with Arthur making Merlin smile and saying 'that's better' OK!?!?!? #it makes me go feral because that's the ending of the ONE ep where they tried to convince us merlin was straight like #but unfortunately there is no space....

[welcometogrouchland]

It's about like.

Willow fought to be seen as strong, because she is and for a very long time people not only convinced her that she wasn't, but that a lack of strength correlated to a lack of worth. And because of this past of having to prove herself and rediscover who she is and could be, Willow accidentally internalized the idea that others perception of her as strong is conditional on her always succeeding despite the obstacles, always staying in control and on top of things, always being the shoulder to cry on, etc etc.

And to an extent, she was right! Amity (unintentionally and well meaningly) refused to acknowledge willow's strength, leading to her having to prove herself, Boscha takes great pleasure in pointing out the chinks in willow's armour because Boscha feels better about herself when someone else is beneath her and she most often makes Willow that target. These are examples in which someone (correctly) paints Willow as pretending to be strong, but act like if they peeled back that facade, all you'd be left with is weak, half a witch willow. Whereas Hunter and Gus understand that even if you peel back willow's front of strength to see the more vulnerable side of her, there's still a strong foundation that takes little time in getting back into the swing of things once she's let it all out. Willow can be reliable and have debilitating anxiety. She can be whiney and needy and still be brave and powerful. Reliable people need someone to rely on too.

Willow's arc in labyrinth runners meant a lot to me because being consistently told that you are weak and need the help of people who love you but who struggle to understand you and see past their own need to protect you, by those people hit close to home and was incredibly validating to see. Somebody once compared the writing of those interactions to microaggressions, and intentional or not it resonated with me bc of that I think.

And now willow's arc in FTF completes this in a way that's very viscerally satisfying to me. Because proving your worth to people, no matter how successfully you do so, takes such a toll on your own mental well being and self perception. Bottling up your emotions so you don't drag others down is so difficult. And you deserve to cry like a big fucking baby if you've been doing this. Let it out!

For the future is an episode about being seen and heard, so to have Willow be so thoroughly seen and heard not just by the people who understand her best within the show, but also by the writers and consequently the audience is just.

It's what she deserves. And I love her very much

#ramblings of a lunatic #the owl house #toh #willow park #i have art i want to make of herrrrr but i have 27 mental illnesses and am banned from most public spaces #just listen to con man by the tuts and think abt her for me! please!!! #this could've been a huntlow post but i restrained myself. barely. anyway just know that hunter is my fav narrative foil for willow #and that is absolutely the reason I'm so obsessed with them #it's about everyone but you getting to define your own identity and then you saying. actually what if you didn't do that. bitch #and specifically how she helps him w/ this and then it comes full circle and he helps her with this #neither of them can tolerate the other talking bad about themselves and it just so happens that they share the same struggles #so by comforting the person they love it loops back around to being a form of self comfort. self recognition (then love) through the other #anyway. explodes

[oatbugs]

pls i need to provide updates

#basically yesterday night was chaharshanbe suri . which is a solar new yr tradition where we let go of the past suffering in our year #and like...start the new yr w fresh vigour . anyway so my friend was at the event and we were abt to leap over the fire #and she was like bro im im glad u blocked her (situationship) etc etc . and then. my phone started vibrating. and i look at it. and my f #friend looks at it. and its her. and were both like what the fuck?? i blocked her things r Over and anyway so i pick up the phone and shesl #acting like nothing happened (bc nothing DID happen for her) and she was like ohh ur doing chaharshanbe suri im not doing anything etc what #are ur new yr plans so i jusr .IDK WHY I DID THIS . but ig i didnt wanna come off as like lonely i said probably hanging out w family and #friends maybe reading poetry together . et cetera and she was like wait that sounds so fun why didnt u invite me! #LIKE WDYM YOUVE BEEN CONSISTENTLY MAKING IT CLEAR U DONT WANT TO BE IN MY PRESENCE . and i told her that after #everything i thought she didnt want to see me again and she was like you always think that 😐 . like. ?? ok anyway so she expects me to #invite her . and like. there is an above 0% but sub-5% chance she will actually show up . but the panic that gripped me #i started making calls to my friends asking them if they can come on the 23rd bc there must be an event and also i asked my mother #and she said actually yeah i am doing a thing on the 23rd :D it involves over 16 ppl (we live in a v small flat) of which like...7 are kids #so you wont have space to be in ur own room let alone invite others. which tbh like ...being around a bunch of loud kids doesnt seem fun fo #any of my friends or me etc so i thought maybe i should arrange things so that we all go out together and if she shows up she shows up 🤷‍♀️ #but . im so. WHY DID I SAY THAT . i had to panic-call my research partner and ask him to get from oxf to where i live on the 23rd #and when he heard the explanation he like. the light in his voice disappeared 💀 but he potentially agreed so idk #THE ISSUE IS. 23rd im supposed to also have . a date #w this girl that i had a huge crush on when i was 15-16 (posted abt this b4 but id get shitty black coffee in the mornings just to spend a #few more minuted w her each day and she was the cleverest girl in school and she cared abt nothing but her academics but now shes very gay #scraggly homosexual etc etc shes cute) and YEAH IDK #like id have to go there on the date come back fast meet ppl POTENTIALLY (again under 5%) meet situationship girl #like is that even doable #but the thing is it would be so so so funny bc all of my friends dislike her sooo much #.........what if i invited the girl im supposed to have a date w over to hang out w us #god that would be so hilarious and chaotic . i wont do it tho im a mature person x #but it would be soooo funny #I HAVE AN ASSIGNMENT DUE TMRW 12:30PM IT IS 10:49PM RN I HAVENT STARTED IT bc i was rotting sadly in bed #popped a ritalin pill tho so here we go x #i have found myself in a state of such sheer agony and rage and sorrow and grief over this girl that atp i feel like #its just so entertaining . like i feel vaguely over it? ik nothing will come of it so its like just . have fun . vibe

[kinos-fortress-2]

does this even looks like a tf2 fanart anymore

#just experimenting! #i was gonna say im gonna delete this later bc i will ofc change the colouring here but just wanted to show bc i think is pretty #ONLY THIS ONE DRAWING bc is more... pretty me thinks but totally not from the way i wanted to go #but yeah little spoiler for something im doing bc i am so drunk and in love with them i cry a little bit but im fine now #i just love love #kino art #piss mauling #this looks very far away from my art style... but it reminded of my older style too... and like those 2016 shipp art if ykwim #this looks so personal im sorry i promise i will draw funny gore tf2 ugly art back again dont unfollow me bc im happy tonight is 1am buak #- i just wanna feel... happy and pretty and being in love space thats. how im feeling right now... dont drink wine guys my last words #watercolors dont go w my style i just realized that... but this looks pretty for me imo i feel kinda happy with this but is not the idea tb #ughhhh that sniperpauling playlist got me in the feels #really. this doesnt even looks like tf2 art anymore literally like. what tf2 game did yall play?? #this two are basically my ocs atp #im so annoying with them ugh

[yorshie]

Pea Brained Bounce House time. Was thinking about the earlier Mikey bit. Then I started thinking about Warm Coded. And then:

Raph’s got like. This thing, when you’re working out with him. He uses the cover of coaching you to stare.

It’s not until he’s got you doing chairs against the concrete wall, and you look up in pleading askance on how much longer you’ve gotta hold the position, that you finally catch the way his attention is trained on the swell of your stomach. The uncanny focus of his gaze on your thighs as the muscles start to tremble and seize up.

Raph likes to stare.

#……. hm. is this gonna be a blood orange fic? #are they gonna converge? #looks at the blurple fic I’m already planning. fuck. this might be a blood orange fic #but how would that even work? #Mikey is so much harder to set a boundary with than Leo and Donnie #and what about my head canon of Mikey sneaking into Raph’s bed during nightmares? #I could just see. raph wakes up and readers all against him all warm and cuddly #he goes for the sleepy morning action #but his hand knocks against Mikey’s shell and there’s like the awful dawning realization that his little bro is cock blocking him #cue Mikey waking up cuz you smell all warm and he wants action too #only for the same realization to have th both going >:[ at each other #raph gets up like fuck this I’ll be a good boyfriend I’ll go get breakfast. you want pastries doll? I'll get you fucking pastries #and Mikey’s like fuck that I’ll be a better boyfriend I’m gonna go make homemade juice #and then reader is like. wtf where are my cuddly buddies? Why is everyone so pissy this fine morning? #<- zero clue they are in the middle of a pissing contest #goes to take a morning shower and gets interrupted cuz Mikey doubles back #youngest sibling gotta take advantage of the older one being out and all that #I could just see him all annoyed halfway to the Kitchen before going *wtf am I doing* and backtracking to corner reader in the bathroom #raph drags reader back in his room and closes the door in mikey's face when he gets back with pastries #cuz personal space (nest) privileges and it was cold outside and damn it he's was a good boyfriend he deserves cuddle time #also he didn't get mikey any pastries #proceeds to show reader there's more than one way to enjoy a pastry #……… have to think about this one actually plot poly is hard #raccoon rambles

[minweber]

Belisarius Cawl, hiding for his life, his ass kicked, ship crashing, friends in mortal peril: I am such a smart boy, he-he-he =)

#I love him so much your honor #warhammer 40000 #adeptus mechanicus #belisarius cawl #genefather #guy haley #cawlposting #(kinda going to finish my thoughts on the book here since I ran out of space on the last post) #but a huge HUGE part of what I loved about this book were all the fun relationships and dynamics that it had set up #I literally want to see all of those characters again #Cawl and AsanethAyu? Absolutely. Not necessarily in a shipp-y way (Unless?) But god do I love seeing necrons bicker apparently #Cawl and Bile? Do my eyes deceive me or did Haley actually pull off 'we are not so different you and I' thing in a genuinely interesting wa #Cawl and Primus? What can I fucking say?! #Guy Haley should be awarded a prize for bringing back emotion and weight into what is surely one of the top 5 most overused words in 40k #Cawl and Qvo? Never before have I so thoroughly understood shippers of something that I don't personally ship. #I (barely) write a different type of fanfiction but somewhere in here there is a potential for the most wonderfully fucked up family #Primus and Porter? They did not talk but parallels between them were set up SO hard. This one is definitely not shippy for me #just so fucking charged with storytelling potential #All the minor guys? X99 whom I now love dearly? Oswen who was set up to be the traitor so hard and then just sort of wasn't? (Unless?!) #Skitarii Marshal named Iota?! Maybe later on that one #and that is to say absolutely nothing about the MASSIVE (eh? get it?) set up for the next big Cawl thing? #god so many threads to follow up on #Guy Haley you owe me like at least three follow-up books

[lcevinolusola]

.

#just spent the last 2 days deep cleaning my aunts house in preparation for my grandparents to arrive #my back is destroyed and i have a literal blister on my hand #all i want is to crawl into bed and suffer from my allergies in peace but NOOOOOO i have to go birthday shopping #what do you buy for an 87 year old man who doesnt want anything and who has no space for knick knacks #i miss you bed i miss you tumblr i miss you mutuals i miss you booping i miss you free time #ill be back soon mwah im kissing you all i love u hope youre all having a happy april pls pray for my back #personal

[gojoest]

so i turned mr waiter down and he reacted with 👍 to my message

#— ai rambles #i went radio silent with him last night bc i was trying to gather my thoughts #and he did keep messaging me very odd stuff #like i hope you are thinking of me blah blah #or do you not want me anymore #HEAD IN MY HANDS #like the moment i don’t reply back he throws a fit #this guy apparently knows no personal space 😭 #and today i just felt compelled to be super direct and tell him as it is #maybe i hurt his ego #idc but i def dodged a bullet there

[boyywithluv]

.

#having a creative rut feeling #gonna rant #im basically a giant baby and i don't handle angst very well #and i constantly worry that im just. idk mentally weak or a deeply uninteresting person bc of it. #every big fantasy artist i see is usually very into making sad or angsty pieces and like i wish i was like that #like i fall into this mental hole very very often that im just holding myself back with how many subjects i dont write or draw #but also like when i DO write dark subjects it doesn't make me feel any better?? #i dont like feeling sad or angry bc once i am its extremely hard to get back out of it. #and thats scary for me. #but also i want to make art that means something instead of my nonestop slew of smut and feelgood content. #i genuinely feel so trapped by my own emotions and its sp frustrating. #i keep getting told how good for you it is to get the negative feelings out but it never helps when i do it #i just feel. worse? i dont feel good. #i kinda wanna delete the one cloud post bc it just doesn't feel good. #ugh #idk i want to have good intelligent things to say and thoughtful art to make #and everything i make feels soft and cheesey and lame. #not that i find those things lame #but just that it feels like im stuck in baby brain. #when i was a teen i would write horror stories!!! i still love horror!!! #but if i make someone suffer in fic now it feels me with this awful awful overwhelming sense of dread and guilt and i end up so upset #im frustrated at me bc this is such a fucking weird sensitivity to have. im tried of telling myself its okay #bc i WANT to feel mentally free enough to create shit that isnt just uwu soft. #i don't think im making sense but like. #you know #I've literally been bullied out of fandom spaces for only making soft content #multiple times. #so idk maybe this is a learned sense of shame #but i feel like a big over sensitive baby and like I'd be able to do so much more if i wasn't #vent ish

[torchickentacos]

Spider in my bra. How in the fresh HELL did that even happen, and can it never happen ever again, please?????

#like while i was wearing it to be clear. I do not care if that's tmi. i just lived a nightmare scenario. #how does anyone expect me to go back to exam studying after this. oh my god. #i love spiders. but not that much. jesus christ. #'one sentence horror story' I just lived one. #taylor's tag #arachnophobia tw #nsft #<just to be safe. it's genuinely not unsafe for tumblr. but if anyone filters stuff i want to respect that as much as i can #unlike how the spider disrespected my personal space. rude.

[edsbacktattoo]

for all of my beloved ttb readers, the last chapter is going to be a little bit delayed. i’ve been hit by cosmic despair due to our official cancellation. the last chapter will be posted as soon as i’ve had some time to grieve 😌 thanks very much for your patience 🖤

#it has been a difficult three fucking months #i usually try to maintain a happy attitude on here #bc this is a safe space and i want it to remain positive #however at the moment everything is just. a bit much #so i’m taking things slowly atm :) #i’ll be back to my usual happy idiot self in no time i promise #but for right now things are hard 🖤 #i’m not going anywhere btw #sticking around like a bad tattoo 😌 #ttb #personal

[kirby-the-gorb]

#kirby #daily kirby #my art #digital #hal laboratory #nintendo #it seems our gas furnace was contributing to my flare up so my wife went out and bought a space heater. #(mcas is an illness that can react to literally anything regardless of how safe a thing probably is for most people) #(and yes I am vaguely aware twitter was arguing about natural gas but I've never liked it personally) #(it smells bad which usually means that it's bad for me) #(which like convenient that that one single safety system works! glad things I find unpleasant turn out to be things I should avoid) #(cuz I know that's not the case for everyone) #(and like growing up undiagnosed autistic I was really pushed to just put up with unpleasant sensations) #(so it's good to have double justification for not forcing myself to eat foods I know I don't like and so on) #(but I'd turned it off yesterday cuz I had a hunch) #(and I turned it back on this morning cuz I didn't want the cat to be cold) #(and I hadn't had a flare last night) #(but I started feeling worse whenever it kicked on.) #(so.) #(pretty straightforward answer there.) #(whoops left half of the thought shared with twitter in the post body -n-)