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yaatrickyassification · 2 years

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Hello! :D

I see that ur requests are open, if they're not, then uh, ignore thsi (　；∀；)

anyway

may i request gun and samuel (if u write for him ^^) with a gn s/o who's rlly cheerful but has seperation anxiety?

ty and have a nice day/night! :D

Thank you for your request!

[ Park Jong Gun, Samuel Seo x Gn! Reader ] - Gn! s/o who's cheerful but has separation anxiety.

Park Jong Gun:

This man didn't notice anything at first, you were so cheerful and there wasn't anything that alerts him or can make alarm bells ring inside of his head, well, save for the supposed clinging. But Gun sucks it up to be your love language of some sort, he loves it when you cling to him.

He loves it when you depend on him, your arm intertwining with his while your head lays on his shoulder. Heaven.

But somewhat after he does notice some of your clinging tendencies worsen, for example, like, being in distress when he's about to leave for work, excessive worry about him dying or getting injured, and worried about unexpected events that may cause Gun to be gone for weeks or even worse months. He thought of it as you being too overly worried for him and he likes it, no one has ever cared for him this personally before.

Of course, with love comes with dislike. Gun's a man whose very purpose is to be an enigma, a mystery that is supposed to be solved by other people. He has a lot of secrets and his line of work is dangerous. He is worried about you coming with him when he's at work. Also, all of his colleagues are weirdos and he doesn't want their germs infecting you.

The man is blunt and would ask you to back off, he's tired from work and he wants some space for himself too. Of course, he feels guilty for saying that to you but there's little to bear with, when you explain to him that you have separation anxiety, his guilt will double.

"Don't be sorry [y/n], text me, or even call me if you ever feel distressed. I don't guarantee that I can pick up or answer you immediately and if I am free I would text you back or answer your call. I assure you, I will always come back home to you. You will never be left alone ever again with me by your side, got that?"

He became much more lenient than before, he will also buy you a lot of things that remind you of him.

Samuel Seo:

He knows that you have separation anxiety and kind of uses it against you sometimes (sorry for all the Samuel Seo fans out there.) With how this man has been hell-bent on making Gapryong Kim notice him and be proud of his accomplishments when he was a middle schooler, he would have some issues too.

Especially when he found out that his father wasn't the one he had been expecting, and when Samuel strangled the life out of the man, and as Samuel watched the light in those orbs get sucked out of those eyes that looked characteristically similar to his, he gets jealous.

And now he's stuck with a never-ending inferiority complex that can never be healed, of course, when he started to date you, his inferiority complex has slightly gotten better, especially with how cheerful you are, your cheerfulness makes his day a whole lot better.

He's lowkey boasting about his relationship with you with Jake, "see that, you might be Gapryong Kim's son, but have you ever experienced an s/o's touch before? No. You're just a virgin." Okay, I don't exactly see him saying that but it kind of does look like that when he gloats to Jake.

And when he finds out that you get anxious or distressed when he's separated from you? His love meter for you went to the roofs, he hasn't experienced anything when it comes to love and he was neglected ever since his childhood days, and now someone can't sleep when he's not beside them? Gets anxious when he's not there? He loves it.

Assures you that he will never leave your side, when Samuel falls in love he falls in hard, he's entirely dedicated to this relationship, he will answer all of your calls and text, a meeting about a new business opportunity? Wait a damn second, [y/n]'s calling.

Eugene's tired of his bullshit but he's good with what he does that's why he just pays no mind to it.

"How are the third and fourth affiliates doing? Samuel Seo." Eugene's voice echoes throughout the meeting room, the other occupants now staring at the man whose suit looks like it's about to pop near his chest area, as Samuel was about to open his mouth to report his duties, a low ding was heard inside of his pockets, the notification sound familiar to his ears with how it is his designated ringtone if you ever called or text him, or in this case, a text.

Samuel slams down a folder that holds hundreds of paperwork that involves the third and fourth affiliates and explains the summary with quick speed to Eugene causing everyone to almost have nosebleeds with how fast he is talking, though everyone can still perfectly and clearly understand him, his reports were always sincere and with perfect clarity after all.

After the full-on fucking rap from Samuel, he sits himself down calmly before taking out his phone with a smile on his face, Eli just looks at him weirdly while Warren is full-on gawking and Nomen is just there needing a fucking translation on what the shitstorm Samuel just said.

"Oh hey, [y/n], what's up? Something wrong? No, I'm not busy. I just finished doing my report, yeah, I'm about to come home. Do you want me to buy food? Okay, what do you need? I'll buy all of it."

#yaatrickyassification #lookism #lookism webtoon #webtoon lookism #lookism x reader #lookism webtoons #lookism gun #gun x reader #park jonggun #park jong gun #samuel seo #samuel x reader #lookism samuel

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rvxscreams · 6 months

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im genuinely grappling with the decision of whether to live or die

ive told myself the last few years, in order to get through each day, "you can either choose to end your life now, or accept that youll be alive for another long time, so why not try and make that time left more bearable?". this usually works. i think whats scaring me about where my mind is going is that the solution is slowly becoming "well then maybe i'll end my life instead"

maybe because im a coward. a coward who isnt strong enough to confront or challenge myself with the things i need to do in order to get better. ive always tried so damn hard to take accountability, be compassionate, supportive, and strong. but i havent been able to be strong for months now.

im stuck between a rock and a hard place. it always results in me punishing myself no matter what choice i make. i want to reach out to loved ones and ask for support? get fucked, youre selfish and manipulative for forcing others to give that emotional tax to you without you giving anything to them in months. but oh, you want to just quietly disappear and not make a theatrical out of fear of being attention seeking, so you dont ask for help or talk to anyone for weeks on end? youre a stubborn baby who cant accept help so theres no point in helping you because all you ever do is refuse it

i am a bad person. and i wish i stopped deluding myself into thinking im not, because all that does is skirt accountability.

i hate expressing how much pain and agony im in because itll just upset people. but then offing myself would upset them more. but i need to feel community and connection. and i feel like it's too late to come back from my isolation. how can i just come back in pretending like nothing happened? how can i pretend that i dont wanna kill myself every god damn fucking day and that ive spent months of having my biggest achievement be "i didnt hurt myself"

i cant get through a therapy session without sobbing. i cant think about my old life without having a breakdown. i try so. so. so. fucking hard. to amp myself up to reach out to people, but it's so easy to convince ymself that my presence will receive a strong negative response. like. why bother? i have no positive impact on others. i dont know why im still holding on and deluding myself into thinking it's worth doing so.

im stupid. no matter what i think or feel, my brain manages to find the negative in it and turn it into makign it my fault somehow.

ive always thought i am too weak for this world, and that has become apparent again.

i wish i could be strong.

i wish i could go to bed excited for what the next day will bring, instead of hoping that it'll be my last conscious thought.

im sorry.

this isnt a goodbye note. i am safe but i am not okay at all. im sorry for the heaviness of this. i dont want to be an emotioonal burden any more. i dont want to be thsi way. i just watn this pain to end. i just want it to all go away.

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