#i feel so terrible today

[leafuxxtea]

^•w•^/

#leaf rant #i feel so terrible today #ive just been crying #in class haha #i feel so mentally tired #i just #i wanna go back home and disappear #just really feel like im attacking myself rn #ik im only emotionally unstable rn cuz my period is coming tho #i hope ppl dont really perceive this #i didnt know where else to pour my emotions #since its my besties bday #happy bday to her btw #im so sorry to anyone that knows me #all my condolences #okay im done now

[chthonickore]

I swear if I have covid again I'm just gonna burn something down

#seph talks #i feel so terrible today

[mokadevs]

happy fate extra/ccc english patch release !!

#fate #fate extra #fate extra ccc #ccc #fate ccc #fgo #bb #fate bb #hakuno kishinami #kiki draws #5 year ccc fan excited to play it for the first time #played for about 3 and a half hours before taking a break to draw and man! #this feels so surreal! #to be able to play it myself... i thought for sure id need to wait till i was near fluent in jpn haha #and that even then itd be slow going #but i get to play it now!! in my hands!!! #sorry for taking a break from my hueweek on the last day hahaha #yesterday i was feeling really physically terrible #today ccc came out #so you see the problems

[crabussy]

IS ANYONE ELSE FEELING KIND TODAY!!! IS ANYONE ELSE FEELING GENEROUS TOWARDS OTHER PEOPLE!!! IS ANYBODY ELSE BEING KIND AND TRYING TO UNDERSTAND EVEN WHEN ITS HARD!!! IS ANYONE ELSE ASSUMING THE BEST OF OTHERS INTENTIONS AND RESPONDING IN KIND!!!! CAN ANYONE HEAR ME

#having a day ^_^ #I love being kind I just wish other people loved being kind more #people on the internet are SO FUCKING MEAN TO EACH OTHER???? its a terrible phenomenon #I have never seen people in real life treat others badly with the horrifying proportion of hate I see online #please. try to be kinder try to be more patient even when its frustrating #I have changed minds and deescalated arguments SO many times by being kind. #if someone is spouting misinfo in a furious rage and they're saying hurtful things? try responding with patience and kindness #even when you don't feel they deserve it. because one of 2 things usually happens #EITHER. they immediately shift their tone because you're talking to them like an equal and not an idiot #OR they continue to be horrible and it makes them look really nasty. its not a good look!! most people won't do the second thing!! #hateful online arguments has turned my mental health into a disgusting stew in the past #since I started being kind out of sheer frustration my mental health has improved a thousandfold #listen. sometimes its okay to be mean. if someone tells you to kill yourself I dont think its appropriate to give them patience and kindnes #BUT. if you treat someone like they're stupid. even if you're right!!! they won't listen to you or consider your words!! #because admitting you're right means admitting that they're stupid like you think they are. that feels bad so people won't do it #my wisdom. today I am so tired

[unoriginal-and-dumb]

I’m nawt gonna lie gang, with the day I’ve had today I realized I should stand up for myself against stuff that’s making me upset because I’ve had enough of not being joyous so im addressing it

I said before that I don’t mind if people draw inspiration from my infected design, but there has been a lot of times (so many today of all days of course) where it really is just my design and yes I am flattered but please, please credit me

I came up with the design as a whole on my own, based entirely on “oh that would be kinda cool” in my head, and when I first started drawing it I didn’t really see anyone else drawing rlly anything similar to my design at all so I mean.. I dunno man I kinda would like credit maybe please

adding on to part of the reason why im doin this cuz now im seeing other people given credits and it’s like hm ok 😮😕

It’s been happening for nearly every single fandom I’ve been in now and it’s like errr ok…

#I dunno like I said terrible week and today has really just made it all worse #so maybe im just overreacting here but I am upset and #I think I should respect my feelings and then like do stuff about it #I DONT KNOW MAN MAYBE THIS IS SELF CENTERED #THEN IM GONNA BE EVIL AND SELF CENTERED I LOVE MYSELF #whatever

[lesbianoctoling]

Splatoon 2: Octo Expansion (June 13, 2018)

Alt Text in image.

#Splatoon #Octo Expansion #Splatoon 2 #Splatoon 2 Octo Expansion #Splatoon gif #My edits #I am so sorry for the terrible alt text if someone can write smth better feel free. The brain fog is bad today and I genuinely cant remembe #half the words im looking for ^^" #and yes these gifs look bad on purpose haha/. I have video versions of them if people want to see #flickering

[stardustvanfleet]

soft pretty bob jakey bc i’ve been having a tough week and i miss him :-( 🩷

#i want him to post soooooo bad. #these past couple days have just been…. so terrible for me. today i was at the restaurant and i started crying in the kitchen #and the owner saw me. and asked if i needed to go home for a while. #so now i’m waiting and i have to give her a call soon to see if they can manage tonight without me or if i need to go back in. #and dude…… not to be dramatic but i’ve been sitting here crying for the past hour i really do not want to go back in #i really don’t feel like i can wait tables tonight. i’m exhausted and just so sad. idk. #li speaks #jake

[twistedappletree]

< baby peony blorbo thoughts night (aka, every night) 🏹💮💛 >

#mdzs #the untamed #mo dao zu shi #jin ling #jin rulan #the grandmaster of demonic cultivation #mdzs fanart #my art #fanart #god drawing on paper is so much easier than digital idk how y’all do it 😭 #I like the sensory satisfaction I get from traditional art better I think #when I use procreate it feels too smooth #and it’s like #it makes my brain too smooth to draw lmFAO #ALSO #I actually did this at the restaurant I mentioned earlier #and I leFT HIM THERE #so uhhhh #congrats on whoever gets a free jin ling today ahahaHAHA #at least I took a pic before I forgot him jfc i am a terrible mother #the worst girl uncle ever kabdjajsAJDBAJDJJA #mdzs juniors #baby boy #mxtx #mxtx fanart #traditional art #also also tagging this was pointless bc tumblr removed it from tags entirely lmao WOW #oh well #i shall keep my blorbo all for myself Ty #OK ALSO LAUGHING BC I DIDNT MEAN TO DRAW HIM FLIPPING YALL OFF BUT LMAO

[stellaluna33]

Good afternoon, lovelies!

#I felt cute today so... #I always feel terribly vain and vaguely ridiculous when I try to take a selfie haha #And they never turn out the way I think they should either! #Ah well!

[curioscurio]

sinus pain. throat big owie

#today was all just slowly feeling worse and worse #woke up not terrible but now im on the couch and can barely speak and all congested #tomorrow will be so drippy i know it

[sciderman]

How do you feel about the increase in really weird NSFW ads on here (advertising panels that look like sexual encounters, and AI art apps that pride themselves on porn) but will take down NSFW posts from their users, even if it isn't technically sexual.

i hate all social media and it's consistent prioritising the advertisers over the users and the internet simply was a better place before capitalism sunk its hooks into it

#i could write essays about how capitalism ruined the internet. #i was actually talking to someone earlier today about how youtube was kind of effectively ruined by monetisation. #and they were raised in the soviet union and we had a bit of a talk about how art was better because it wasn't for profit. #the people who made art made it because they wanted to do it and because they loved it. #she said that communism was terrible for every aspect of life for her. people's lives under communism wasn't pretty. #but the art was better. and i feel like it's true for the internet – it was better when it was a free-for-all. #the companies didn't know how to exploit it yet and turn it into a neverending profit-driven hellscape. #people created content because they wanted to. because they wanted to make something silly to make people laugh. #not for profit. not for gain. not for numbers. not to further their career. #i miss the days of newgrounds and youtube before monetisation. #capitalism has soiled everything that's joyful and good in this world. #people should be able to share whatever they want. #people should be able to tell any story they want without the fear of being silenced by advertisers. #that's what made the internet so beautiful before. anyone could do anything and we all had equal footing. #but now we're victims of the algorithm. and it makes me sick. #i'm quitting my job in social media. i'm quitting it. it makes me too depressed. i have an existential crisis every freaking day. #every day i wake up and say "ah. this is the fucking hell we live in #i'm so sorry i feel so passionate about this. #social media is a black hole and it is actively destroying humanity. forget ai. social media is what's doing it. #i miss how beautiful the internet used to be. it should've been a tool for good. but it's corrupt and evil now. #sci speaks

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

frothing at the fucking mouth over the lil Howdy Approved teaser. what does it mean!!!! im gonna need to make sure im awake for the drop!! that will be tough!

#pingponging Off The Walls- #is it a new puppet? is it howdy? is it merch? #if its merch then i Definitely need to make sure im awake for the drop just in case its limited #i mean! its definitely something Physical!!! #a shoe behind the curtain!!! someone is back there! #i cant tell if theyre saddle shoes or not... if so then HI WALLY <3 #the caption also points to it being some sorta wally merch... the capitalization of Darling the 'howdys place' branding #absolutely unprompted #im gonna have to set an alarm or somethn... #ive been sleeping too much! i feel Terrible! #today i slept for 10 hours then was awake for a whopping 30 minutes before passing back out for another 3 #so! three days to fix my nonexistent schedule! FRIDAY!!!! #friday friday friday whatever it is IM EXCITED!!! #finally! something to look forward to!!

[tethered-heartstrings]

causing psychological damage on father's day one abigail post at a time

#girl had three father's and they were all terrible #i have so much queued up for today lol sorry in advance #i guess the show about corrupt fatherhood with a character that has complicated relationships and feelings abut her father(s) #inspires father related content who knew #the speaking clown #abigail hobbs #hannibal #hannibal nbc #nbc hannibal #will graham #hannibal lecter

[angelpuns]

I want to keep up with the TMNT Au comp propaganda but its starting to make me not want to draw at all, so I probably won't be making too much more propaganda and will instead be focusing on finishing this Kid Leo Intermission. After that I will probably be taking a short break from comics because everything lately just feels too much and too difficult ;-; I still have so many extra comics I want to draw and I had a lot of propaganda ideas, but I just can't keep up with the pace of it right now and forcing myself to draw things that I don't want to is hurting more than helping.

TLDR: I'm gonna finish out the Kid Leo intermission here soon and then take a break and draw some other stuff for like a week before getting back into comic posting :)

I'll try and answer tmnt au comp asks and add on to previous propaganda if I can, but more than likely I'm just gonna be resting or drawing other stuff for a while

#i hate taking breaks #but sitting down to draw lately just feels awful #and i find myself dreading it more and more #so #i am thinking i need a break #ill probably draw some other stuff un the mean time #or ill just stream games or smthn #i just need to step back and take a huge breath cause i feel terrible all the time #sorry for not being able to keep up tho <3 #im at least gonna finish the intermission today

[squeakadeeks]

if i had a dollar for every time a religious missionary knocked on my door to "spread the good news" while i was actively in an acute mental health crisis i'd have 2 dollars, which isnt a lot but also. how many times does this have to happen before they stop coming.

#technically ive actually had three but the ones where they come to my home feel more violating and embarrassing #heads up im going to talk about grim things but its so bananas that its hard not to talk about #2 years ago i had one come while i was Participating In An Activity One Does When You're Grappling With SI #and it was a very bad time and an overall terrible encounter #especially bc it was obvious at the time i was deeply unwell but of course they didnt want to actually address it #and today i had two come while i was having an active manic episode and looked DEEPLY insane and was in the middle of some bullshit #and both times as soon as i opened the door i can tell theyre like 'oh fuck' and realize that theres something serious going on #but at the same time. play stupid games win stupid prizes. #if someone is having a MH crisis they try to do it in a safe and private environment like their gotdamn house for a reason w/o strangers #and if you just show up unannounced to talk about Mormonism to a random persons house theres a good chance youre going to be- #interrupting something and that something isnt always good #i know door-to-door solicitors are '''normal''' but the whole thing really whacks me out and makes me feel kind of angry

[icewindandboringhorror]

There's always a slight yearning in the back of my mind wishing I had been born in the right place, time, family situation, income level, etc. to have just lived in one single house for my entire life. Imagine being born in a place that still suits you, even through all of your personal evolutions and etc. The idea of deep familiarity with an area because you've lived and explored it for 40+ years, being encased in a web of memories and connections. Being able to clean out your old childhood bedroom and find personal artifacts, to dig in the yard and remember. I know those lives can still be plenty imperfect, but there's just something so seemingly solid and stable and Grounding about it that I sometimes wish I could have.. (At least from my outside perspective as someone who's moved around a bit geographically and even within the same area, never lives in the same house/ apartment /etc. for more than a few years usually.) Like... having a place that is printed upon, fully your own, rather than chronically a visitor, every thought of a space always tempered with the notion that one day soon you'll have to pack it all up again, etc. There's something peaceful about the permanence.

#I think also because I'm a very nostalgic person - THOUGH not in the way that somep poeple mean when they say nostalgia because I've realiz #ed that to some people apparently it means like.. more of a sad emotional thing? Or when I talk about being nostalgic they say 'me too' and #then describe how they're always depressed dwelling on the past wishing they could revisit it and replaying it and feeling sad and etc. #Whereas for me - it's not in a deep or emotional way at all. It's very detached - kind of like someone who is doing like a scientific #cataloguing of something? I don't feel any remorse or sadness or longing or sitting there sobbing for hours over people/pets I've lost or #etc. It's more like a fun contemplative excercise and extension of self analysis plus just documentation. Like I know your memory fades as #you get older OR even as stuff is actively ongoing humans have terrible recall - even the ones who are less emotional/more focused on #accuracy our minds still twist things or etc. SO I looove to have documentations of everything possible so that in the future I will have #as full and complete of a view of myself as I possibly can. sure the image will undoubtedly be a little distorted but having real evidence #of how something was at a time is very valuable. You look through old messages or letters or something and you always find other alternate #versions of yourself. Not in a worse way like inherently inferior Previous Models Of You who haven't yet been perfected but even just in a #neutral way like 'what they're saying is not a BAd thing but also is not how I would say that today.' etc. ANYWAY I find it really interest #ing to document and remember things and love revisiting the past - not in a sad way - but just like. curiosity. reminiscing and recalling #and filling in gaps. or trying to have the same feeling I felt at a previous time so I can remember what it was. Collecting information for #documentation purposes. Like for example - I would love to go back and tour all of my old childhood houses/apartments. Not to like #sit in the middleof them and cry and go 'ohhh my childhood waughhh' - but literally because I want to take detailed photographs so I #can remeber exatly what they looked like and recreate them in sims or some other digital way. Why? idk. just to gather the information. If #I ever live to like 80 years old and I'm still reflecting on my life curious about the dteails of it. I want to be able to fire up my #ancient windows 10 laptop I've kept all these years and open up the sims 4 and tour my old home with accuracy etc. ?? #Not sure why really. Maybe an extension of how I generally care a lot about having an 'accurate' view of things? Like I would rather be #accurate than be happy. I don't understand 'ignorance is bliss' because I would always rather know. I always always in any situation am mor #focused on 'what is the well researched practical truth' than about 'how does this make me feel' or etc. Truth above ALL else even if it #were to make me miserable. Aka why I'm a 'boring' 'annoying' 'UM actually..' type of killjoy lol because it's very hard for me to understan #that some people can enjoy something or have a good time even not knowing the full facts of a situation or etc. BUT anyway. since that is #some core driver of my personality for whatever reason (just the plague of ennegram type 5 perhaps lol) maybe that also drives me to my #kind of minor obsession with like 'I must have a complete view and calatoguing of my life that is as accurate as possible within the means #i have' . Is it REALLY important for me to know the exact layout of on of my first childhood bedrooms? no. materially it does nothing for m #in life. BUT hey. it would make a great addition to the Accurate Life Story Catalogue lol. ANYWAY.. But I think a lot of wanting to live in #one place forever is not just the ease of documentation. but the sense of having a constant. Much of what i crave most in life is stability #& familiarity &routine bc of how my brain works. And it just would feel so good to be Settled. Never uproot again. One little place FOREVER