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#i dont think itd be considered provocative enough to tell someone and have it be taken seriously -_- whatever.
readymades2002 · 1 year
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apparently i dislike one of my coworkers noticeably enough, despite not saying anything about it, that he took the liberty of catching me alone when i was putting on my high-visibility gear yesterday and asking me about it. which did not stop him from deliberately trying to rope me into a conversation when he got the chance later for reasons i can only assume were related to making me uncomfortable which congratulations! you succeeded
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thelifetimechannel · 6 years
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JAKE: Hello there ms kanaya! KANAYA: Hello KANAYA: Jake Right JAKE: Thatd be me! The one and only! JAKE: Or the one and only now haha. JAKE: So uh... weve not had a chance to talk yet. JAKE: Cool chainsaws? KANAYA: Thanks KANAYA: I Had A Lot Of Time To Alchemize More And Better Chainsaws During My First Session KANAYA: It Was A Good Way To Be Passive Aggressive I Think JAKE: If you displayed them on your wall itd make for one hell of a first impression. Imagine being like the dad in the movies whos sitting on the porch polishing his shotgun when his daughters new boyfriend comes over. JAKE: Though ive never heard of anyone displaying chainsaws in the first place... KANAYA: I Will Install Several Pedestals For That Exact Purpose With Tasteful Backlighting KANAYA: They Are Probably Too Heavy To Hang On Most Walls I Wouldnt Want To Cause An Accident JAKE: I say go for it! I think it sounds like the bees pajamas. KANAYA: I Dont Know About The Fashion Predilections Of Insects But Alright KANAYA: I Dont Think Youll Need To Display Weapons Provocatively To Intimidate Potential Suitors If Reports Of Your Recent Activities Are To Be Believed KANAYA: Our Hope Hero Styled Himself Formidable But I See Now He Barely Scratched The Surface Of The Aspects Capabilities KANAYA: Most Of Which I Accidentally Awoke In Him Anyway KANAYA: Which Is A Lesson To Never Be Facetious If Youre Not Willing To Put Up Your Dukes About It So To Speak JAKE: Yeah i learned that the hard way. JAKE: Sometimes you really do just need to tell your problems to fuck off! Whether or not you actually punch them in the face. KANAYA: I Am One Of An Elite Few Who Has Not Faced Off Against An "Evil Clone" Yet KANAYA: Im Almost Disappointed JAKE: Maybe some day? KANAYA: One Day I Enter My Hall Of Chainsaws Only To See One Pedestal Is Empty KANAYA: I Look Down The Hallway And See An Ominous Shadow Advancing KANAYA: The Shadow KANAYA: Its Me JAKE: Like youll get your own version of venom or manbat or something whos your vampire nature run amok! JAKE: ...i did hear correctly right that youre a vampire? KANAYA: Our Term Is Rainbow Drinker But The Idea Is The Same KANAYA: Im Trying To Reform JAKE: Aha. A vegetarian vam- er, rainbow drinker? KANAYA: Vegetables Are Pretty Great KANAYA: Ive Lived On Donations But The Whole Thing Is Kind Of Ridiculous KANAYA: The Sort Of Arrangement That Looks Intriguing And Romantic In Storybooks But In Real Life Is Kind Of A Pain In The Neck JAKE: Literally! KANAYA: I Walked Into That One Didnt I KANAYA: I Was Hoping We Could Edge Gingerly Around That Obvious Pitfall But Instead We Are Charging In At Full Speed JAKE: You made a dive for the window but alas that spotless pane was stronger than anticipated. KANAYA: Im Used To It KANAYA: The Individuals I Traveled With Would Leave No Conversational Stone Unturned Without Wresting Every Wriggling Wordplay Grub From Its Snug Cocoon JAKE: You were with dave and rose right? KANAYA: Yes KANAYA: And Karkat And Terezi KANAYA: And The Clown JAKE: I cant speak for your fellow aliens but for your human companions i daresay it runs in their family. JAKE: Roxy can do incredible things to typos so watch your spelling around her. KANAYA: Spelling Is An Important Part Of Our Brand On Alternia But Ill Watch My Step JAKE: I mean alien typing quirks is a concept im familiar with thanks to the cherubs. Im more talking about bungling the spelling of the words themselves. KANAYA: Understood KANAYA: If There Are Genetic Similarities Between That Group Does That Mean You Take After Those Dreaming On Prospit KANAYA: I Havent Interacted Much With John But I Did Help Guide Jade Through Her Breeding Session KANAYA: That May Not Be Long Enough To Establish True Closeness But Its My Best Frame Of Reference JAKE: As a matter of fact i do. JAKE: ...though the only time ive seen the planet with my own eyes was a few hours ago and i had higher priorities than enjoying the sights. JAKE: Like not leaving my soul flapping in the wind or beating the snot out of the maniac who stole its original getup. KANAYA: Ill Try To Draw Independent Conclusions Based On Your Behavior Rather Than Trying To Match You Up To Any Of Your Ancestors Or Descendants Then KANAYA: Im Not Used To Meeting This Many People KANAYA: Or Any People KANAYA: Fives Been A Crowd JAKE: A feeling i know very very well... JAKE: I mean i seem to remember you were there when we all came across each other in the dreambubbles! KANAYA: In The Dreambubbles KANAYA: ... KANAYA: You Were The One There When We Met The Empresss Previous Form KANAYA: The One Who KANAYA: Uh KANAYA: Attempted To Defeat Her Ghost In A Bout Of Fisticuffs JAKE: Yes. JAKE: That. JAKE: Haha... man that was embarassing in hindsight. KANAYA: If It Makes Any Difference She Was So Addled By The Revelation Of Her Tyrannical Supremacy I Dont Think She Noticed JAKE: Possibly. KANAYA: Actually It Provided Good Conversational Fodder KANAYA: Any Topic Becomes Stale Given Enough Sweeps To Mull It Over So New Stimulation Was Welcome KANAYA: When Dave And Rose Were Together She Frequently Tried To Draw Him Into Speculation About Your Characters KANAYA: He Never Liked To Engage For Some Reason JAKE: That was the first time id been around that many people in my life! JAKE: So i guess that added pressure to impress in a sense. KANAYA: I Grew Up Alone On An Oasis KANAYA: The First Time I Ran Into Crowds Was During This Game JAKE: Likewise! Except it was an island not an oasis. JAKE: That seems to be a trend doesnt it? KANAYA: Jade Told Me Something Similar KANAYA: Maybe Its Easier To Leave The World Behind Without A Second Thought If You Had Fewer Ties To It JAKE: I couldnt agree with you more though its sort of sad when you stop and think about it. JAKE: The game seems to take a lot of lonely chaps doesnt it? JAKE: Or... maybe it sets them up that way. KANAYA: Believe Me As Someone Charged With The Creation Of Life In Our New World The Prospect Weighs On Me KANAYA: Enough To Take Rose Up On An Offer Most Would Consider Suicidal KANAYA: But Then Most Of Her Schemes Are JAKE: O: JAKE: What is it rose is plotting? KANAYA: Oh Hasnt She Gotten To You Yet KANAYA: She Will KANAYA: Especially With Your Capabilities KANAYA: Im Not Clear On The Details Yet But Im Sure Those Will Come In Eventually KANAYA: Probably In The Heat Of The Moment If Our Other Adventures Are Any Indication KANAYA: Mostly It Involves Defying The Status Quo KANAYA: Which Is What Almost Everything She Has Done Since Ive Met Her Boils Down To JAKE: I mean she did help us get calliope back so if theres something she needs me to do id be happy to help lend a hand! KANAYA: I Believe Shes Intending To Bring It Up To The Group Once Weve Finished This Round Of Discussions KANAYA: So Youll Hear About It Then JAKE: Oh boy more mysterious plots. Look i may be a guy whos always eager for the next adventure or whatever but id like to propose a motion that we at least get a siesta first. JAKE: Three super over the top throwdowns in the space of a few hours tuckers a guy out! KANAYA: I Will Back You Up On That KANAYA: If We Bundle Her Up Well Enough She Will Be Unable To Escape And Will Be Forced To Give In To Relaxation JAKE: My grandma used to do that when i was a wee tyke and didnt want to go down for naps. KANAYA: Good Then Youre Familiar With The Technique JAKE: We just need a person three to four times her size and itll be a snap! JAKE: Oh hey jade can handle that. KANAYA: Now That I Have Restored Her First Guardian Abilities I Will Ask That Her First Action Be Restraining Rose For Her Own Good Before She Hurts Herself JAKE: Sounds like a smart idea but given what ive heard of her im not about to volunteer to be the first in her sights. KANAYA: Would Deaths Incurred Be Heroic KANAYA: Im New To These Rules JAKE: Im... not sure. JAKE: Perhaps its best not to chance it. KANAYA: Hopefully We Can Talk Her Into Taking A Short Break JAKE: Surely even a god tier has to take a load off every now and again. JAKE: Unless rose just runs on anarchic fervor and dreams. KANAYA: I Wouldnt Put It Past Her JAKE: Well calm her down and then help her out with her next revolution.
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chimericarchitect · 6 years
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((Terrible and Saness discuss the recent trouble she’s been having with her guardian and possible solutions to those problems. There are a few trigger warnings for this chat, including head stuff, manipulation, mind control, amnesia, suicide (sorta), and death in general.))
flippinOptimist[WIR] - Today at 11:23 AM FO: chirp? Saness (sanesspsuede) - Today at 11:24 AM SP: Sorry, I was distracted by a musical interlude. SP: I was gonna ask "what do you want to know" but you'd probably have a hard time forming specific questions without something to base it on. SP: So, uh, you wanted to know why that strategy was the strategy I've got going. I'm not actually set on it because I don't like it as a plan, but I will probe my options before taking action y'know? Even the ones that suck. SP: Anyway, Anista is a golem or something. SP: And it sucks. flippinOptimist[WIR] - Today at 11:30 AM FO: totally, checking out your options is the smart thing even if some of the options are horrible bullshit.  you wont know exactly how bad an idea they are if you dont check FO: i usually bring up the worst idea first when im tryin to solve my own problems, just so i can cross it off the list... FO: that does suck.  i could tell there was something going on in her, but ive got no idea whats in there. FO: was she always a golem? Saness (sanesspsuede) - Today at 11:34 AM SP: I think so. I'm guessing a little bit on that part. Context says probably, because I did a thing and almost got wiped so she got replaced with a Brand New Anista Golem that functioned like she used to, meaning that she's acting like a full person again instead of a zombie. flippinOptimist[WIR] - Today at 11:53 AM FO: uh, yikes FO: you okay there? FO: and who or what replaced her? Saness (sanesspsuede) - Today at 11:55 AM SP: I'm... uh, yeah. SP: It's just a thing. SP: As for the who/what in charge of replacing her, I'm not quite sure. They're a lot bigger than me, but I'm not willing to say "horrorterror" without evidence. I'm not experienced enough to tell. So, for now, it remains a mystery. SP: If you meant "what is she now" then the answer is "a seemingly normal troll who is constantly keeping tabs on me and probably ready to dropkick my pan at the slightest provocation." flippinOptimist[WIR] - Today at 12:01 PM FO: misc eldritch thing #1 it is FO: yikes, thats p shitty FO: if i ever catch you acting different, do you want to give preemptive permission for me to sneak over and try to return you to this state? FO: or like, to come check and make sure any changes are Legit Things You Wanted And Are Fine With Saness (sanesspsuede) - Today at 12:03 PM SP: That would be pretty great, if you don't mind. flippinOptimist[WIR] - Today at 12:04 PM FO: fuckin anytime, dude, ill set myself a timer to peek at your blog once a week.  make sure to delete the logs of this convo in case she peeks at your computer FO: okay so, something happened, and she wound down enough that she stopped working.  but then something else happened, and now shes back. FO: is she winding down again, or is she going to stay at full capacity? FO: did the thing that put her together like this get distracted and wander off forever, or did it wander off and then come back? Saness (sanesspsuede) - Today at 12:10 PM SP: There is no evidence suggesting that she is in a state of decline, presently. She was fine and seemingly normal for the entirety of three sweeps before she turned into the zombie fake-o person. My current hypothesis is that she... wears out? Like a timer, or an old battery or something. SP: The thing that did this obviously isn't hanging out 24/7 or I probably wouldn't be me already. I think Anista-Golem is like a watchdog or something for whatever-the-fuck eldritch doodad the first. SP: A lot of that is gonna be speculation; I don't know much about the big guy. flippinOptimist[WIR] - Today at 12:14 PM FO: yeeahh...(edited) FO: yeah you need out of there dude FO: and you need out of there in a way that they wont notice FO: so i can see why the death thing is a thing FO: i wish id known about this while you were still seery, then i coulda asked some questions an gotten pokey about a lotta fuckin FO: theres a lotta unknowns here and a lotta things that Could branch how this goes If they are true FO: ... shit is p whack, friend.  anythin i can do to help i will Saness (sanesspsuede) - Today at 12:18 PM SP: Thanks, Terrible. I really do appreciate it. flippinOptimist[WIR] - Today at 12:22 PM FO: this one time my life sucked total ass, and someone was nice to me at exactly the right time.  and i decided that maybe being nice to people wasnt stupid, and that it was nice that there were people like that around.  so i decided to be someone like that. FO: this shit is exactly why. Saness (sanesspsuede) - Today at 12:23 PM SP: It's a good attitude, in my opinion. I prefer to help people when I can. SP: Before I go on about my plan to get out of here, there's a bit more to this yet, of the things I know. SP: One of the reasons I trust my death-note-suggestion from the future-past is because, like I said, I almost got wiped. SP: If I hadn't been all godly when it happened, it might've worked. Probably would have. SP: Anyway SP: I was getting erased, or blocked, or something (gross and weird) because I was messing with a mind wall (maybe?) and I got caught. SP: So maybe I need to disconnect from whatever I'm tethered to. SP: It's what I'm guessing, anyway. I'd prefer not to do the dying thing, obviously. flippinOptimist[WIR] - Today at 12:24 PM FO: B( FO: yeah, obvs. FO: im guessin you respawned once, but also dont remember parts of the anon? FO: is there other stuff that feels not solid? FO: the healer chick would need a small piece a you but hair or blood would probably do it, and she could rez you from a distance on command after that.  shed just need to know when Saness (sanesspsuede) - Today at 12:41 PM SP: Most of the not-solid is from my memories. I don't remember a lot of stuff, it seems. Other stuff has to do with Anista and the generator. SP: Oh wait. SP: The generator. That's an okay idea. In tandem, not separately. SP: I'd need to put Anista out of commission for a bit though. Hm. SP: Can you tell me a little about the healer lady? I trust you, but I've never spoken to her I don't think. Is she a God Tier as well? flippinOptimist[WIR] - Today at 12:43 PM FO: yeah.  shes a meenah, Meenah Peixes FO: long story short she lives in sparks's universe, and she's kinda low key and staying out of the spotlight.  does a lotta bakin, some healin for pay. FO: shes kinda mercenary but i think she cares about dudes once they catch her interest, which most dont FO: the universe shes in has legal limes, crimsons, and wings, and no caste system, so theres no problems on the mutant front FO: i could vouch to be there and supervise 100% of the rez process if you trust me enough for that an itd help any Saness (sanesspsuede) - Today at 1:00 PM SP: I don't know if that will help any, but I appreciate the offer and I'll keep it in mind. SP: I considered whether or not, as a Prince of Mind, you'd be able to bust shit up so I could skip the not-being-alive part, but that seems less likely to work and more likely to get you smooshed by the eldritch fucko. SP: Besides this stuff, I'm trying to convince a pal of mine to go off-world with me before they fuck up and start a sgrub session. SP: None of my timeframes are defined, so it all feels kinda like it has to be done immediately. Am I gonna get wiped? Is my friend gonna blow up this Alternia? I don't know what's happening first. SP: I think I'm rambling now, sorry. SP: More useful thing, practical type. Do you know the charging rates on resurrection? SP: Which is a funny sentence, by the way. flippinOptimist[WIR] - Today at 1:04 PM FO: fightin an eldritch fucko would be a heck of a fight, but its one id give a go.  ive done it before, ive pulled that kinda shit outta dudes heads.  theres a big variance on how big an individual eldritch fucko happens to be though, so its a thing to take super fuckin seriously before blunderin straight into FO: if anybody could cut a mind connection, id probably be able to though FO: ramblin makes sense, and bein in a hurry makes sense too.  why is your friend on the verge of startin a sgrub session?  do they like, know not to? -- flippinOptimist began sending file : meenahsfliersarefuckinweird.pdf --  (( a 2-page document, where the first is a classy menu for baked goods with a catering section at the bottom, and the second is a matching menu for healing by injury type with a 'special requests on case by case basis' section at the bottom.  It lists reviving as a special request. )) FO: i think she bases it partly on what a dude can scrape together, but idk FO: theres a chance sparks might be willin to help (or meddle) for free, but hes got an M!A rn thats fuckin up his ability to do things Saness (sanesspsuede) - Today at 1:17 PM [ sanessPsuede downloaded meenahsfliersarefuckinweird.pdf ] SP: Oh hey, great, thanks. SP: I don't know how close she is to starting one, because she's not answering any of my messages. SP: I'll probably have to hunt her down in person. I figure she can't start a game if I get her out of the zone for a bit. SP: Maybe delay the inevitable. SP: Fex is a cool dude. You and he have some stuff in common there. SP: I haven't been able to tell my friend not to yet, obviously. I don't think she took it seriously when I told her about it before. flippinOptimist[WIR] - Today at 1:23 PM FO: good luck delayin it, an talkin your friend outta it FO: sgrub is somethin you can make the best outta, f you get stuck in it, but uh FO: a lot of it sucks real bad Saness (sanesspsuede) - Today at 1:27 PM SP: It's probably more efficient SP: to see if dying works SP: rather than engaging in a risky conflict unprepared SP: Side note! SP: Thoughts on how to break a mental connection to a thing that is not a person? SP: Like the Anista puppet or a wall. SP: If there's not a mind, can there even be a link? flippinOptimist[WIR] - Today at 1:41 PM FO: efficient isnt really a good word when somebodys life is on the line, and id still risk it.  its more about whats most likely to work i think. FO: i think worrying about whether or not something is a person is more of a soul / heart thing FO: if it has a mind, thats close enough FO: theres plenty of bugs that are too simple for me to be able to get a read on FO: and a couple a computer programs that are almost something enough, that i cant quite reach FO: but i peeked at her and saw that she existed and that there was stuff, if i was careful enough i might be able to unplug somethin FO: i think info processing and the ability to choose between outcomes is the big thing.  ideally in some kind of.. complex..ish way, naut just a simple if statement Saness (sanesspsuede) - Today at 2:07 PM SP: What about a literal wall? Something completely mindless. Could something eldritch-y make a connection to it? flippinOptimist[WIR] - Today at 2:11 PM FO: never seen one!  one way to find out though B) Saness (sanesspsuede) - Today at 2:22 PM SP: :D SP: Okay, I'm gonna see about getting in touch with Meenah. No point waiting around. SP: It's efficient, and probably more effective. SP: I'm not inclined to gamble with more than my own neck if I can avoid it. SP: Risk to result ratio says dying is the way to live SP: while causing the least amount of harm, probably flippinOptimist[WIR] - Today at 2:25 PM FO: if youre sure dude FO: for what its worth, if you go into a death knowin its comin and bein okay w knowin youre (probably) comin out the other side, its naut as aaaaaaaaAAAAa as it is when its a surprise and also a big upsetting disruption FO: its still kinda A Fuckin Thing, but FO: its possible to get over it, more n most ways of death comin by Saness (sanesspsuede) - Today at 2:29 PM SP: Okay, I'm not really sure, but the alternative worries me a lot and putting other people at risk jangles my moral compass pretty hard flippinOptimist[WIR] - Today at 2:30 PM FO: man, if you ever godtier, you're definitely gonna run into problems w the heroic thing Saness (sanesspsuede) - Today at 2:35 PM SP: Just means I'd be a normal dude with super powers. One life, one death. Seems fair. SP: And sucky. SP: No thank you, Sgrub. flippinOptimist[WIR] - Today at 2:43 PM FO: yeah, p much.
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