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plethora-of-imagines · 4 years

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Human Custom

AN: So this fic started as an anon that just kept getting longer and became it’s own fic. Which is why I am not yet done answering anons. The idea was so soft and let me tell you anon, I spent many nights just rereading this prompt and thinking it was so very soft. I’m not too happy with how the Master sounds in this as it is more from his POV and I don’t have a great grasp on Dhawan!Master’s POV but I tried my best!

Word Count: 1773

Description: Written based off of this anon

Tag List: @c-s-stars @queerconfusionthings @how-masterful @truthbehindthemysteries

The Master huffed and rolled his eyes at all of the gaudy Valentine's gifts still on display in the store. He honestly believed they should just throw them all out the second it was the 15th. It was bad enough to have to see them before the “most romantic day of the year”. He couldn’t believe that he had to subject himself to this just because you had forgotten something while doing the shopping. Of course, you couldn’t just do without. So someone had to go get what you forgot. Lucky him.

To be fair he probably shouldn’t have volunteered to go for you so you didn’t have to feel embarrassed about the shop staff seeing you come back for something. You had been absolutely adorable when you pressed your face into his chest bemoaning your forgetfulness. It had made him forget how much he hated going shopping like this on Earth. It reminded him too much of the 77 years he had been trapped without a TARDIS. Which always left him in a touchy, annoyed mood.

The two teen boys blocking his way past as they slowly walked down the aisle were pissing him off too. If it wouldn’t cause even more trouble for him he would just TCE them both and be done with it. He took a deep breath. He would just push past them soon and continue on his way. It was fine. He would get what you had forgotten and you would jokingly call him "your hero". Giving him a soft, loving kiss for his troubles. It would be worth the annoyances to make you happy.

The Master had no choice but to listen to the two kid's conversation with the volume they were talking at. Wonderful.

“Look man, it’s complete bullshit that she didn’t tell you she was moving until yesterday!”

“She just wanted us to have a normal date before telling me that we would be going long-distance okay?”

The Master wanted to roll his eyes so hard that they fell out of his skull. He did not want to be stuck listening to lower lifeforms and their romantic struggles. He settled instead for slowly dragging his hand down his face.

"I'm just gonna get her one of those stereotypical bears holding a heart stuffed animals to give her before she moves. It's on sale so it's not going to cost me much if she does end up breaking up with me."

"Fair enough, man. It's your money."

Stereotypical bear? Was this some customary holiday gift or something? The Master had to admit he was curious.

Then he saw them. Dozens of bears of different sizes and colors. Most of which were holding a heart-shaped pillow with the words "I love you" on it. He wanted to be disgusted by them but then the image of you clutching and cuddling a bear after falling asleep while waiting for him to join you entered his thoughts. You would probably love it, and it would be absolutely precious seeing you cuddling a stuffed animal he got for you. He needed to get one for you now. The image would consume his mind until he gave in to it.

He examined a few of them trying to decide which one would be the least insufferable to buy and carry back to you. They all seemed too human of a gift. He couldn't see himself handing you one of these. Besides none of them were the size he imagined. The Master wanted it to be half the size of you, something you could curl around comfortably. Something inhumanly soft for you to smush your face into as he teased you for your bed head and sleepy expression after waking up.

This store may be too human but humans spread across the universe in the future taking their customs and holidays with them. It shouldn't be too hard to find something that fit what he pictured. Something big, soft, and decidedly not human-like. And none of that cliche "I love you" on a heart stuff. He could get something much more profound for you.

The Master rushed back towards the TARDIS. He knew just where to go to get what he wanted. Brushing past you he began to take off immediately.

"Did you get the milk?” You asked in bewilderment at his hasty actions.

“They were out.”

Well fuck. He forgot that there had been a reason he was in that store in the first place. Perhaps he shouldn't have rushed off in such a hurry.

“They were out of milk,” your tone was completely flat.

You definitely didn’t believe his lie. Why didn’t he think of a believable lie instead of just saying the first thing he thought of?

“Okay, fine! I thought of something that I need to buy before I got to the milk. Two birds, one stone situation. I can get both the milk and what I need from the store I am going to.”

You wrapped your arms around him, leaning your head against his body. His body relaxing as you held onto him. He loved you so much for being so understanding.

"Okay, Master. As long as we do get some milk. We really need some so I can bake and you can make us hot chocolate. I'm still jealous that you make hot chocolate so much better than I do. One day I'll learn your secret."

Closing his eyes for just a moment the Master enjoyed the comfort of your embrace. Once the TARDIS landed he reluctantly left your arms. He had a plan to accomplish.

"I'll be back. And this time I won't forget to grab some milk."

"Oooh, you did forget. You admit it!"

He playfully booped your nose. Anyone other than you talking to him like that wouldn't survive the next minute. When you did it, it was fine. In fact, it was encouraged. He loved it when you were playful with him. He wanted you to have no fear of him, to treat him like an ordinary person. Even if he couldn't be any further from ordinary.

"Well if someone else hadn't forgotten in the first place we wouldn't be in this position."

You covered your face with your hands as you flusteredly cried out, "Nooo, don't remind me!" with a laugh. You were too adorable to handle. He would never get over it. If he ever lost you somewhere - and he would never dare lose you- he could just describe you as adorable and you would be quickly found.

His errand didn’t take long at all, especially when he chose to have the inhuman stuffed animal sent to the TARDIS by teleportation. In no time at all, he was back by your side smiling to himself as he presented you with the milk. He had been successful in getting just the right stuffed animal for you. You would be wonderfully surprised.

"Did you get what you needed?"

You were soft in your curiosity. Not pushing too much for an answer but expressing your interest in what he did.

"Yes. It should be here shortly. I asked for it to be packaged and sent so I didn't have to carry it and the milk."

"I'll be back soon then. I'm just going to go put this away before I manage to forget."

Perfect. By the time you got back to the console room, the box should be here for you to open. He watched you leave. The moment you were gone he lowered the TARDIS shields so that the gift could be delivered. Just as he put the shields back up you walked back in.

"What did you need to get? The box is huge!"

"Open it and find out."

You gave him a wary look as if you feared that he was playing a prank on you. The Master didn't let it bother him, your reaction should more than makeup for your minor distrust. It’s not as if it wasn’t justified. He had played pranks on you this way before. The joyous laughter and smile on your face when you pulled the stuffed animal out of the box sped his hearts up. It was some weird combination of a bunch of standard anatomy of different animal species found in the universe. With fins, tentacles, and antenna. Half the size of you, you could just barely bring your arms completely around it. He had made sure that it was as soft as possible, softer than any other stuffed animal in the universe.

Gasping, you moaned out into the stuffed animal as you smushed your face into it. "Master it's so soft!"

You pranced over to him, your face still pressed into the stuffed animal. You were ever more precious and adorable than he had imagined you would be.

You popped your head out from behind the stuffed animal to ask him curiously, " what does it say, Master?".

He didn't want to admit what it said. It almost felt embarrassing to say.

"What? Don't you know?"

"I can guess but you know that I can't read it! The TARDIS likes teasing me too much."

You playfully pouted at the TARDIS by looking up towards the ceiling. In truth, the reason the TARDIS rarely translated for you within her walls was to ensure the two of you spent time together. The Master never tried to hide how much he adored holding you in his lap as he read to you for hours. So his TARDIS created opportunities for him but refusing to translate while you were in the TARDIS if not necessary. He sighed. He might as well tell you before you assumed it was something as generic as "I love you" written on the heart.

"It says, you are my universe."

He messed up. You had tears starting to form in your eyes. What had he done? This was a terrible idea. His hands moved to cradle your face, prepared to wipe away any tears.

"Oh no, don't cry! Shh, shh , sh. It's okay."

"Sorry, I just- this is just really sweet and I'm a bit overwhelmed. M' not sad if that's what you're worried about Master."

Shifting the stuffed animal to one side you moved in close to hug him. Pressing a soft kiss to his lips. Your lips as sweet and soft as they always were. He could never tire of the sensation of your lips against each other.

"I love you, Master."

It wasn't the first time you had said it. But his heart swelled all the same as this time he held you close in his arms.

#dhawan!master x reader #the master x reader

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transparenttriumphzombie · 3 years

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I Am Woman By D. Cookie Fields as told to Michelle Burford from Essence Magazine November 2006 edition As a man he joined the Marines, married the love of his life and had two children. All the while he struggled with the sense that he was meant to live his life as a woman. One day he decided to make a change. As far back as I can remember, I had felt like a stranger in my own body. As an only child growing up among rambunctious boy cousins and friends in a working class Chicago suburb, I knew I wasn't quite 'right.' I think my mother suspected something, too. When I was 4 she found me coloring my fingernals with crayons. "Little boys don't do that," she whispered as put away the Crayolas and scrubbed my nails clean. Later I would borrow her skirts, earrings and shoes to play dress up. I often told her I that I felt different, not like other boys. "What do you mean," my mother would say. "You fit with our family." I know she had no idea how it felt to me-a girl trapped in a boy's body. Back then my parents could not have conceived that I would one day board a plane to Thailand as their son, D, and return as their daughter Cookie. By the time I reached adolescence, I regularly dressed up as a woman, though I knew enough then to hide it. If Mom discovered my stash of heels, dresses, bras and makeup hidden in the house, she admonish me by saying "You've got to stop this!" But neither she nor my father ever had a direct conversation with me about my cross-dressing. Maybe they thought it was a phase I'd outgrow. I never did. LOVE AND MARRIAGE I wasn't gay. I've never once been drawn to a man, nor have I ever had sex with a man. I am only attracted to women. At 17 I had intercourse for the first time. What I recall most was the feeling of intimacy-the kissing, the caressing, the closeness. The only part I didn't enjoy was the penetration. When I was still living in a man's body a girlfriend once told me, "Making love to you is like making love to a woman." And yet I did everything possible I could to seem as manly as possible. After graduating from high school in 1977, I joined the Marines and moved to South Carolina. Within months, I had worked my way up to the head of uniform inspections. I still felt a compulsion to cross-dress sometimes, but I'd sneak off the base to do it. Then in 1980, when I was 20, the military relocated me to Los Angeles. There for the first time I met other cross-dressers like me. And I met transsexuals-those who'd had sex-change surgery. Though we all fell under the acronym LGBT(lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender), I discovered that even in this group I was atypical, in that most male cross-dressers are attracted to other men. Still for the first time in my life I felt understood. It was such a relief to know I wasn't alone. In Los Angeles I also met the woman I would marry. I saw her sitting with her sisters at a military social and asked her to dance. She turned me down, but her sisters, both military wives, urged her to give me a chance. I must have seemed perfectly respectable with my short Marine Corps fade. We exchanged phone numbers, and soon I was seeing this woman with the unforgettable smile every weekend. Eventually moved in together on the military base. That's when she found my women's clothing. "Whose are these?" she asked me. Nervously I told her the truth-that I liked to dress up as a woman. The obvious questions followed: "What do you get out of it?" "Are you gay?" I tried to reassure her that I simply felt most comfortable when I cross-dressed, and that I'd never had sex with a man or been unfaithful to our relationship. She was confused and disturbed by my desire, but our relationship was so good in every other way that she stayed, and in 1982 we got married. We had a son soon after, and two years later a daughter. I would sneak off to Hollywood at least one weekend each month dressed as a woman. In the first few years of our marriage, my wife stumbled across more and more of my women's clothes, and with each discovery, the strife between us intensified. "Just don't bring your life into our house," she'd tell me. I began keeping my wigs, heels, purses, earrings, nail polish and lipstick in the garage. I understood why she and almost every other person in the world would never get it, but I felt so compelled to cross-dress that I couldn't give it up. The most I could do was promise my wife that I wasn't sleeping around. Even with my secret hovering over us, we enjoyed a fulfilling sex life. So we each did what we had learned how to do: live in the space of denial. DON'T ASK, DON'T TELL Then came the night that my 11-year old daughter saw me dressed up as a woman. I'd come home late to find the garage door locked, so I'd gone to another door. When I passed my daughter's bedroom, she woke just in time to glimpse her father in a skirt, wig and red lipstick. The next day she said, "You we're dressed as a woman last night." She didn't seem upset, but I insisted she was mistaken. I felt so guilty about lying to my child, but I was convinced she would find my behavior confusing. I told myself I was protecting her. In the months that followed, I escaped to Hollywood with increasing frequency. Somehow I felt more myself with my transgender friends than I did anywhere else. One Sunday, sitting in church with my family, listening to the minister preach about living an authentic life, I felt as if my heart would shatter from the pain of living such a lie. I knew then that I would never be happy as a man. That was the day I began to think about becoming a woman. Though I still loved my my wife deeply, our marriage, undermined for so many years by my secret excursions, finally collapsed under the weight of them. I'll never forget the night we told our children we were separating. "Does this have anything to do with that night I saw you dressed up?" my daughter, then 12, asked me. I confessed that it did. My son, who was 14, looked at me in stunned silence. I can only imagine how difficult it must have been for him to grasp that I didn't want to be a man. Even now, though we have a pleasant relationship, he won't discuss it. I wish I knew how to explain it to him. By the time we got divorced, I had started taking hormones (progesterone and estrogen pills) to grow breasts. The hormones also made my voice higher, and I underwent electrolysis to remove my facial hair. After four months, my C-cup breasts were definitely noticeable. Since I was still in the military, I wore a sports bra to flatten my chest and used a stall when forced to change clothes at the base. But the strain of hiding was getting to me, so after 15 years of active service, I joined the reserves and applied for a job as a police officer with the LAPD. During my required physical I had to take off my shirt for an EKG. The technician was shocked to see my full breasts! But after an awkward moment she never said a word. I still don't know why she never told my supervisor. After that, I wore bulletproof vests on duty, so my secret remained safe. MY NEW BODY I decided to go ahead with a sex change in 2001. I told my wife ex-wife and my children first. At the time my son was 19 and living with his mother, and my daughter was 17 and living with me. Maybe because she'd seen me all those years ago, she supported my choice to have a sex change. My ex-wife and son were a little more distant, but they, too, promised to be there for me. Next I wrote a letter to my parents explaining what I'm sure they had expected: I was living as a woman everywhere, except at work. After my marriage ended, all my relationships had been with lesbian or bisexual women. I was so exhausted with my double life. I wanted to align my exterior with who I'd always been inside. The news must have roked my parents to the core, but when I telephoned them later, my mother simply said "I always knew," while my father was characteristically silent. I didn't expect either of them to understand or accept my choice. I'm just grateful that they heard me. I know there are many who would call my lifestyle a moral abomination. But at my church, Unity Fellowship, I've been taught that we're each here for a unique purpose. God could have created me as a woman, but for some reason didn't. That's why I'm so sure I was put on Earth to take this journey. It's not as if I heard God speak through parted clouds, but in my heart I just knew a sex change was the right path for me. My surgery lasted five hours and cost $5,000. I chose to have it done in Bangkok, Thailand, because one of the pioneers of transgender surgery operates there, and his price is half of what I thought I would pay in the United States. My friend Stephanie came with me. Together we boarded a plane and landed halfway around the world so that I could become a woman. If this isn't the journey you want me to take, I whispered to God during the 26-hour flight, then please just let me die on the operating table. The doctor explained the procedure. They would remove my testicles, scrotum and half my penis using a laser, then invert the remaining skin to create a vaginal cavity. I signed the waiver and checked into the hospital early the next day. Five hours later, I awakened on a gurney with a row of bandages across my pelvic area and no pain. I stayed in the hospital a week, marveling at the possibilities of my new life. The afternoon I was released, Stephanie and I went shopping. I know it's hard to believe, but the only soreness I experienced was when the doctor pulled off the bandages. What I saw in the mirror amazed me, a vagina so perfect it looked like I'd been born with it. I've since retired from the LAPD and now work as a security guard. I date women exclusively, and I alwys tell them about my surgery. Sensation has returned to the tissue used to create my vagina, and sex with my new body is exponentially more satisfying. I feel blessed because I have the most any transsexual can hope for: a family that stands by me. When people see me in my uniform now, I let them refer to me as whatever gender they believe I am. Most suspect that I used to be a man, but how they see me doesn't really matter. What matters is that at last I am a woman at home in her body. D. Cookie Fields lives in Los Angeles. She told her story to Michelle Burford, a writer who lives in New York

#transgender woman #transgender #trans pride #black transgender woman #postop transwomen #mtf vaginoplasy #vaginoplasty #magizine

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