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sodamnbored · 3 years

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Jason and Juno

I just want to talk about them. I have so many feelings and I can’t find anyone else that cares about them. But, like, why not?

Because Rick ignored Jason in HoO and I still haven’t got my Roman prequels, that’s why.

I freaking love Jason anyway and I always have. And I admit, reading original PJO, I wasn’t the biggest fan of Hera, but we weren’t really supposed to be I don’t think. But Juno? Nah man, Juno is cool.

Everybody seems to write her off because she’s Hera and we all know Hera sucks, and obviously Percy and Annabeth don’t like Hera so makes sense that we kinda subconsciously take their lead. But Juno is cool - and I will absolutely fight that corner forever. It’s like, Ares was kinda a dick in many regards, but Mars was a good dad to Frank, Mars was cool too.

Juno was one of the only gods interested in actively helping demigods, particularly her favoured ones, sure, but she still tried to help. And she obviously cared about them too. Not just Jason, it was very evident she liked Leo a lot too (and I love that too). And we know - at least from ToA - that she had a soft spot for Frank too (and honestly who can blame her).

But yeah, so I actually dig Juno in HoO. She helped out, she was awesome, she was actively nice at least to Jason.

So that’s the first thing to get over. Hate Hera if you want to - but let me convince you that Juno is better. Re-read the books and look for her being nice and cool. Because it’s there.

On top of that though, the relationship between Juno and Jason just makes me so happy and warm. I love it so much, even though I haven’t seen anyone else that seems to care.

Jupiter was at least as much of a dick as Zeus was - that’s something everyone agrees on I think. And I think a lot of us if not everyone can agree that he was a worse dad to Jason than he was to Thalia. And maybe that’s because he washed his hands of responsibility for him after he gifted Jason to Juno. (Dick move btw.) but either way, he basically ignored Jason his entire life and throughout HoO. He was hands down one of the most distant godly parents of the seven and of a lot of main heroes we’ve followed in the series’. So Jason couldn’t really depend on him for help or guidance an awful lot and basically felt like he didn’t have a father. But at least he had Juno.

Juno was a good patron to him. She helped him where she could. She actively and genuinely cared about him. She tried to make herself available for chats when he needed them as much as she could. Gave him presents (his gladius) and praise when he did well, pep talks for what was ahead. As pseudo foster mothers go, she really wasn’t bad. Closest thing Jason had to a parent, and yeah, he could’ve had worse. He did have worse with his alcoholic slightly off the rails actual mother who gave him away, and had worse in a dad who never spoke to him or saw him or lifted a finger to help him until the very last second and who also gave him away. I kinda gotta figure after that kind of treatment from both your actual parents, getting what he got from his patron was probably very appreciated.

And Juno/Hera is the goddess of marriage and family among other things. Throughout the series it’s pretty much her biggest hang up. And obviously she wasn’t always the best mother (poor Hephaestus) to her actual kids, but she kinda held Olympus together. Stopped them all tearing each other apart. Family was important to her and something she valued. Obviously she hated when her husband cheated on her and had someone else’s kids. Honestly? That’s pretty reasonable to be unhappy about. But she watched the rest of her family, literally forever, having kids willy nilly when they wanted to. Obviously Artemis didn’t, but she didn’t want kids and she had the hunters so that’s fine. For someone that loves family so much, it’s very possible she could’ve been a little envious of everyone else having huge families. She still had her Olympian family, but maybe she would’ve liked to have some demigods of her own, if it didn’t involve cheating which she just won’t do. She favoured original Jason and was his patron too, so she was happy enough to adopt them, but it still wasn’t something she did often. So she didn’t get a lot of mortal kids and might’ve felt like she was missing out. But at least she had Jason.

So, being given another little adopted demigod, hell yeah she probably loved mothering him. He was totally her kid. He didn’t have any parent or family to be there for him, she didn’t have any demigod kids of her own and knew she never will. That’s hella cute that they can adopt each other.

Everyone loves found families lately - well this is basically that. Kinda forced at first but doesn’t mean they wouldn’t grow to love each other. They helped each other, could depend on each other. Juno is literally the patron of Rome as well. So even if Jason hadn’t known from the off that he’d been given to Juno, he’d have still had the sense that she had his back along with the rest of Rome, so he might’ve asked for a little help or guidance before HoO, maybe while he was Praetor too. And Juno being New Rome’s patron would’ve probably kept an eye over Camp Jupiter and especially when Jason rose to Praetor she could’ve been paying more attention to him from then. Watched out for him during the Titan War.

I want to know more about them. Especially if Jason was fully aware that she was his patron the whole time before HoO. I want them to have had some sort of relationship. I want them to like each other at least a little. Nico and Hades got closer eventually. Percy and Poseidon (and honestly a bunch of the gods) got on well. Mars adored Frank. Aphrodite seems pretty cuddly with her kids in general. I don’t think it’d be a terrible stretch for Juno and Jason to have each other’s backs.

I want to know if Jason ever made offerings for her along with Jupiter. Burnt food at CHB for her as well as his dad.

I want to know if Juno ever helped him out on earlier quests at all, whether he knew it or not. If she ever gave him and maybe Reyna too, sort of a Praetor deal, counsel.

I want to see Juno fully lean into having Jason as her favourite, as her chosen hero. I want to see her lend some power to him when he needs it. I want to see Jason with the Blessing of Juno. How many demigods would’ve ever gotten that? That’s unheard of. I want it for him. I want to see him marching on Mount Othrys to take down Krios and topple the throne, not with the blessing of Jupiter (although I would also love to see him with that, that would be so cool!) but with the blessing of Juno, patron of Rome. I wanna see him monologuing Krios into intimidation like he did to the giants: I'm the son of Jupiter, I'm a child of Rome, consul to demigods, praetor of the First Legion. I slew the Trojan sea monster, I have the blessing of Juno: Patron of Rome. And she also happens to be my stepmom, dick.

I talked about it in another post before, him getting her blessing. Supposedly with her Roman counterpart she’s supposed to be militaristic, strategic, etc. A blessing from his dad would be like an explosion of power, don’t get me wrong. It’d be like Thor in Infinity War. Magnificent. He could totally burst into the palace and fry Krios and destroy the throne. But I think it’d also be pretty damn awesome if he got zapped with her blessing and became like the ultimate military leader (kind of like Frank with Mars’ blessing I suppose, but more strategic instead of hitting the protein shakes), leading the troops in the invasion and being a total Praetor before he even became Praetor.

Side note: It’s probably not possible but can you imagine if he got blessings from both of them?? I doubt you can have two at a time, but that would be spectacular if he did. Especially from Jupiter and Juno. He would be incredibly powerful, no wonder the Legion made a big deal out of him in the early part of the series. Always was a little disappointed we never got to see cool Roman Jason. I love Jason, I do, but he wasn’t exactly what we heard about in The Lost Hero and Son of Neptune. It never felt like we saw his full potential. So I’m just gonna sit in my corner and dream it up instead lol.

Anyway, this was purely for me because I have a lot of feelings about these two and I couldn’t find anything about them at all or not anything positive. But if anyone else likes them or has ideas or there is stuff you can point me to, please do, I want to get involved in it and find people that are into this so bad!

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365days365movies · 3 years

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March 15, 2021: Clash of the Titans (1981) (Part Two)

I think mythology is squarely out of the equation now.

We’re gonna have to go with the Disney’s Hercules route with this movie, huh? Enjoy it for what it is, and forget the ways in which is destroys the source material. Well...if I gotta, then I guess I will. OK then, on with the show! Check out Part One for more!

Recap (2/2)

So, Pegasus has been captured by Calibos and his guys. That’s gonna be a problem, since they needed him to cut the journey to the Grey Sisters in half. Well, it doesn’t matter, and the group heads there anyway. Perseus tries to persuade Andromeda, but she rightly points out that she’s the only royalty there, and they all technically her. She girl-bosses her way out of there, and the rest follow.

In Olympus, Zeus asks Athena where her helmet is, and she replies that it’s forever lost in the swamp. Damn, Hades is gonna be piiiiiiissed. Zeus demands that she provides a replacement: her owl, Bubo. And I have a mini-stroke because he just called a GODDAMN BARN OWL BUBO. See, Bubo is the genus that contains the horned owls, including the great horned owl, snowy owl, and eagle owls. They belong to the family Strigidae. Barn owls not only belong to a different genus (Tyto), BUT A DIFFERENT FAMILY ENTIRELY (Tytonidae). So why in the FUCK did they choose a BARN OWL to play Bubo? Or, why did they name it Bubo, considering the fact that Athena’s owl is a little owl (Athene noctua). ORNITHOLOGY RAGE

...Anyway, she understandably refuses. Which is when Hephaestus (Pat Roach) steps up to make a metal replica of Athena’s companion. And yeah, Athena loves her owl almost as much as I love owls. Shae that she’s shit at naming them accurately, though.

The mechanical owl is sent to meet up with the group, as they ride through the desert. And, uh...this clockwork owl is cool, but also goofy as fuck. Also, looks nothing like a barn owl, but whatever. The mechanical owl, also named Bubo, speaks in clicks and whirs, which Perseus can somehow understand. He leads them to the shrine of the Greae.

As they head through the mountains, I think this is a good time to remind myself that this movie came out in 1981. Because I gotta tell ya, this movie feels way WAY OLDER than that. It’s weird, but it really feels completely out of its actual time. It seems like it should’ve come, like 10 or 15 years earlier, at the very least. It’s a little bit of the Harryhausen thing, sure, but it’s also the overall tone and feel of the film. It’s hard to explain, but it feels...old. TOO old.

Anyway, the group makes it to the mountains where the sisters live, and leave Ammon and Andromeda at the base, leaving just Perseus, Thallo, and the soldiers. Bubo’s coming along as well, and...yeah, the owl throws shit off. Especially as we meet the surprisingly accurate Greae (Flora Robson, Anna Manahan, and Freda Jackson).

The Greae, or Grey Sisters, or Stygian Witches as they’re called in the film, are three blind sisters who share a mystical eye, in the form of an orb. They’re pretty goddamn great, honestly. Perseus uses Bubo to steal the eye, in order to give Perseus leverage and get the answer he seeks.

His question is, in this case, how a mortal man can defeat the Kraken. They tell him that he can do so by optaining the head of Medusa, the Gorgon, whose gaze yaddayaddayadda. Additionally, her blood is deadly poisonous. Perseus gives back the eye, and they head back down to Ammon and Andromeda. At a fire, Ammon tells the myth of Medusa. Here, though, she was a priestess of Aphrodite instead of Athena, and was...seduced...by Poseidon. Whoof. To be fair, the whole “raped by Poseidon” thing is a relatively recent revelation in scholarly circles, and to be even more fair...they probably couldn’t mention that shit in a movie for all audiences, especially in 1981.

Andromeda’s put off by the story of the dangerous Medusa, and worries greatly for Perseus. He tells her to stay behind, but she continues to insist on going with him. She goes to sleep, and wakes up to only Ammon, as Perseus has left her behind for her own safety.

Perseus and the soldiers make it to the shore, where Medusa’s lair lies on the “Isle of the Dead”. Said island is in...the River Styx...and to get there, you have to pay the ferryman...CharonOK LOOK.

MEDUSA DOES NOT LIVE IN THE UNDERWORLD, OK? She lived on an island either off of the Aegean Coast, or in Libya, for god’s sakes. She was NOT dead, she was cursed. And Charon WOULD NOT BE THERE, because the River Styx in in the GODDAMN UNDERWORLD. This is wrong on...so many goddamn levels. What’s next, is Cerberus gonna be here for some goddamn reason? Yeah, right.

Well, Perseus and the men, with the aid of Charon, make it across, and onto the Island of the dead. They see many statues here, and Perseus tells them to use the mirrored sides of their shield if they are to encounter Medusa. However, they encounter...Cerberus’ brother.

...Huh. I mean, at least it isn’t Cerberus. No, this is Orthrus, an actual mythological two-headed dog, and actually Cerberus’ brother. Orthrus manages to take out one of the soldiers, leaving Perseus and two guys for backup. Perseus kills him, and they head into Medusa’s temple to take her out.

The atmosphere in the temple is admittedly eerie, as the group does their best to make it through alive and undetected. One guy goes down by arrow shot, though, and soon after that, we see where the arrow came from. And unfortunately for him, so does the other soldier, first hand.

Perseus uses the mirrored shield to distract Medusa, who actually does look pretty great. This is, by the way, the one thing from the reboot film that I think they did pretty well, honestly. And I see that they got many of Medusa’s flourishes specifically from this film. Neat! Anyway, Perseus bides his time, but he gets her. He slices of Medusa’s head, killing the snakewoman outright. He collects the head, but leaves the shield LIKE A DUMBASS. Said shield is dissolved by Medusa’s blood, and Perseus leaves the temple.

On the other shore, Perseus reconvenes with the men and Bubo, and puts the head in a bag. There, of course, Calibos arrives, even though Bubo is SUPPOSED to be the LOOKOUT, goddamn it. Calibos knocks the useless Bubo into the water, and goes to work. He stabs the head, causing it to leak blood droplets that turn into three gigantic scorpions. Um...sure. The scorpions kill the other soldiers, Thallo included. Well, damn. However, Perseus is now PISSED, and kills both the scorpions AND Calibos in revenge.

Afterwards, Perseus drinks from the river, injured and weak. Finally, Bubo climbs out, deciding to be of some use for once. Perseus tells him to find Pegasus, who’s still being held captive by Calibos’ men and the giant vulture. Bubo agrees, and flies off to their camp, where he chases off the men and vulture. Yeah. A tiny golden owl who was defeated by WATER just fought off 5 guys and a giant vulture. AND set the camp on fire, AND released Pegasus. Geez, Bubo, way to wait until the last goddamn second to be useful.

Meanwhile, in Joppa...well, thinks aren’t amazing in Joppa at the moment. Time’s up, and Andromeda’s death date is here. Perseus, head in tow and...no sword. He forgot it with Calibos, didn’t he? DAMMIT PERSEUS PICK UP YOUR SHIT. Anyway, he stumbles back to the amphitheatre in Joppa, where he collapses. In Olympus, Zeus observes all of this, and Thetis tells him that it’s time to kill Andromeda with the Kraken. He’s been surprisingly cool with all of this for...some reason, and tells Poseidon to release the Kraken to kill Andromeda. But he also revitalizes Perseus in the process.

Off the coast of Joppa, Poseidon watches as the Kraken is released. And, uh...I think the time has come. See, the Kraken is the film’s version of the monster Cetus, who I always saw as a monstrous sea serpent. The film however...

...He looks goofy. Sorry, I AM SORRY, but he looks silly to me. It’s not helped by his noodle arms and weird fish body, I guess, but dude looks silly to me. I’ll give the 2010 movie credit, that Kraken actually did look pretty goddamn terrifying.

Well, as planned, Perseus makes his way there on Pegasus (it’s weirdly drawn out, though), and with Bubo assisting him, whips out his secret weapon: the head of Medusa.

And bing bang boom, before you know it, the Kraken’s a stone statue, and falls apart into the sea. Andromeda’s saved, the Kraken is dead, and Joppa cheers! Perseus decides to lose yet one more weapon, and tosses Medusa’s head into the sea. He frees Andromeda, and the two finally get married after all of that.

In Olympus, Zeus triumphs, having won over with his nepotistic bullshit. The other gods fear what would happen if other heroes like Perseus were to appear, and if humans could one day learn to have imagination and tenacity like him. But Zeus brushes it off, and forbids the gods from ever going after Perseus again. He gives Perseus, Andromeda, Pegasus, and Cassiopeia (for some reason) constellations. Because, yeah, that’s the kind of thing Zeus does.

Because, even if mankind abandons the gods, stars will last forever, and the stories of Perseus will last until the end of time.

And that’s Clash of the Titans! I have thoughts! I have thoughts. See you in the Review.

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