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usagi-chan95 · 5 years

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So a few days ago I was on TV tropic looking up a few shows I like and of course I'm a huge Umineko Fan so I looked up the character and everybody who knows me just a little bit now I said I ship this one character with Black Hat. So why not list all hee traits that he would probably like about her. In the end I think the two would get along with each other.

Affably Evil: She is completely indifferent towards the suffering of everybody else, but she sure is polite.

All-Powerful Bystander: She has more than enough power to solve any problem in the setting or destroy everything in the blink of an eye if she wanted to. Fortunately, Featherine prefers to remain a spectator for the most part while she lets Bernkastel cause all the trouble she wants. The one time she does intervene in the plot during her "fight" with Lambdadelta we see that everything would have been lost with Featherine as an active enemy.

Always Someone Better: Bernkastel is regarded as the strongest Witch, but even she knows not to get on Featherine's bad side. Even Lambdadelta, who was more than holding her own against Bernkastel earlier, is terrified at the thought of having Featherine as an opponent. It makes sense when you realize Featherine is not just a Witch, but a Creator as well. She may just be a Witch in name only.

Ambiguously Evil: Both Bern and Lambda describe her as extremely nasty, and indeed she doesn't think much of humans, but she doesn't really have any Kick the Dog moments, and in the end she gives up on publicly revealing the contents of Eva's diary, thus preserving the catbox as Battler and Beato wished.

Curb-Stomp Battle: Delivers one to Lambdadelta in Episode 8. Special mention to the fact that Featherine didn't even have fight at all; she simply wrote down "I utterly defeated Lambdadelta and sliced her into pieces". And then poof, Lambda is completely dismembered.

The Dreaded: Anyone that can inspire genuine fear from Lambdadelta and even Bernkastel is definitely not to be trifled with.

Evil Mentor: Implied to have been Bernkastel's in the ???? of EP6.

The Fog of Ages: She has lived for so long that she needs a special horseshoe-shaped device around her head to keep her memories and avoid insanity.

God Is Evil: Averted, though just barely. She's not so much evil as she is uncaring of how she achieves her goals... though given the things she does do in the story (and apparently before it), you'd be forgiven for thinking it was played straight.

Greater-Scope Villain: Featherine is said to be a Witch thousands of times more powerful and evil than Bernkastel could ever be, but she never becomes a direct villain to the story and remains a bystander for the most part. However, she is indirectly responsible for all the problems from EP7 afterwards as she was the one who gave Bernkastel the power to keep messing with the game board because she wanted Bernkastel to rip the game apart for her and give her the answers to the mystery.

Insult Backfire: When Lambda pulls a You Monster! on her, she takes it as a compliment, which really makes you wonder what amount of chaos she caused in her distant past. It's fully possible that, being Bernkastel's mentor, she possess a trolling capacity far surpassing her miko Bern's... and considering Bern is the most malicious character in the story, that is a scary thought.

It Amused Me: The main reason she doesn't fit into God Is Evil instead. Physical Godliness and lack of a Freudian Excuse notwithstanding, she's still a Witch at heart and will do whatever it takes to keep herself entertained.

Lack of Empathy: Definitely, but better off than Bernkastel at least. Like any other Witch, Featherine sees human lives as nothing but means of entertainment, but she can show her respect to her opponents when it's due and at least now, doesn't seek to actively make others miserable for amusement's sake.

Manipulative Bitch: In the past, she's used Bernkastel as her monkey wrench to unlock the mysteries of worlds and game boards alike, whether Bern wanted to do it or not. Worse yet, Bern was aware she was being used but couldn't do anything about it because Featherine was just that good. This does in fact happen in the story, where she makes Bern the Game Master to crack the mystery of Rokkenjima when the rest of the cast loses interest in it, using Bern's desire for revenge against the family as her motivation.

Offstage Villainy: Bernkastel, the cruelest example of a witch so far seen, finds her a hundred times more horrific than she could ever be. The evidence is suggested at, but never concretely shown. Within the series, Featherine never does anything nearly as horrible as the other witches. Of course, Bernkastel is no doubt very biased, seeing as how she came into existence because of Featherine's callousness and indifference. She probably has room to exaggerate.

The Older Immortal: By far the oldest witch in the series.

The Omnipotent: Without a doubt, the most powerful character in the setting. She's perfectly capable of pausing the plot when she wants a scene to play out a different way.

Outside-Context Problem: Needless to say Featherine is in a whole other league compared to the other witches Battler deals with in the story, which is really saying something. A single wave of her hand to make Bernkastel the Game Master is all she needed to do turn Battler's happy ending into a non-ending.

Physical God: One of the Creators described in Episode 4's TIPS.

The definitive example is that she's ultimately the one responsible for bringing Bernkastel as we know herinto existence. It's heavily implied that she was the one who abandoned Bern as a piece in the Unwinnable game (that she ended up winning anyway), and while it's never explained how she pieced together/recruited all the physically and emotionally destroyed Rika Furudes, it's made clear in the narration that Featherine was the one who taught what would eventually become her miko and the Cruelest Witch. And why? Because she was bored and wanted someone to help stave off future boredom.It's not so much that she meant harm by creating Bern, more that she doesn't care as long as she is entertained.

If you want a more "literal" example, she can use her power to rewrite the script of reality itself and have people do as she dictates. And you would never even know she's doing it.

Really 700 Years Old: She is said to be older than Bernkastel and Lambdadelta, both who are said to be centuries old. By the way it's alluded, Featherine might as well be a Time Abyss.

Retired Monster: Given what Bernkastel and Lambadelta say about (and to) her, this is heavily implied. Featherine herself personally thinks she's much worse.

Rewriting Reality: Her power as a Witch/Creator and as an Author Avatar. Featherine can literally rewrite the script of reality itself to make events go as however she likes. She doesn't even need to write how things go, she only needs to write the result.

Story-Breaker Power:

Literally. When Lambdadelta tries to attack her with magic, Featherine just says that she doesn't like the development of the story, stops time and begins editing the script of the story herself. Not willing to write a fight scene at the moment, she starts from the end of the fight where she dictates Lambdadelta was smashed into a bookshelf and had all her limbs severed. She doesn't even think about how she accomplished such a brutal attack, deciding to "figure it out later". When Featherine starts time again, Lambdadelta ends up just as she wrote, with "what the fuck just happened" being her last conscious thoughts before dying.

She couldn't comprehend the 'something' that Featherine had killed her with. However, that was only natural. After all, Featherine herself hadn't decided what the 'something' was. However, Lambdadelta did understand one thing. She was already dead.

You Cannot Grasp the True Form: The memory device around her head also preserves her form. At one point in the past it got damaged, abruptly changing her personality and appearance. Her witch power also allows her to weaponize this. Refer to the spoiler in Story-Breaker Power above.

#Black Hat x Featherine Augustus Aurora #My crazy ship #i don't care i ship it

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punkscowardschampions · 5 years

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Buster & Rio

Buster: What the fuck Rio: Hello to you too Rio: ? Buster: Don't act like it's not out there for everyone to see Buster: You're playing happy families with Drew now? Not what I meant when I told you to dump your boyfriend Rio: Well that's not what's happening either Rio: the kid's mum kicked off big time and rang the social so I'm helping out with damage control for Indie's sake Buster: Like I said, what the fuck Rio: It's not a big deal, really Buster: I know you wanted to move out ASAP but Christ Rio: I mean, it's a bonus to be away from ALL the kids but I still gotta share with Indie so not living lavish Buster: I'm sure Drew would be happy to discuss the sleeping arrangements, babe Rio: You're so gross Rio: and apparently it's a new one every week here so three's more of a crowd Buster: Me? I'm not the one letting this happen Buster: I go away & everyone loses their minds, yeah? Rio: We've always helped her, what were we meant to do Buster: I ain't saying don't Buster: Take her to your house Rio: She won't stay, this is her house, he's her dad Buster: He ain't Buster: & You're not her mum Rio: I'm not trying to be Rio: but he is, like it or not Buster: Does he know that 'cause he's got you lined up like you are Buster: Which is the only thing I reckon he's trying at here Rio: That's stupid, we're like sisters Rio: but that's why I need to be here, or she might get taken Buster: You're stupid if you think that's how he sees you or any of this Buster: Do what you've gotta do, but so will I & apparently that's saying this shit 'cause nobody else is Rio: You're making it into a thing it ain't Rio: he's a grown-man, for God's sake Buster: That's exactly my point Buster: He's old enough to be your dad but he'd rather be your daddy Rio: Oh, please Buster: Take the warning or don't Buster: I'm not wrong Rio: Whatever, you've said your piece then Buster: Not whatever unless you've heard it Rio: 'course I heard Buster: Whatever then Rio: 👍 Rio: Are you there then Buster: Yeah Rio: what's it like Buster: What I expected Rio: sooooo Buster: So what do you what me to say? Rio: is that good or not Rio: you know how conversation works Buster: I'm obviously having the time of my life Buster: When don't I Rio: Alright Rio: glad to hear that Buster: 'Course Rio: let you get back to that Buster: Don't Rio: Don't what Buster: Don't go Rio: It must be weird, being somewhere new and totally on your own Rio: did many other kids from your school do it too or Buster: A couple of nerds, no competition for me, like Rio: I'm sure Rio: be good if you could hang with them though Rio: some familiarity Buster: I'm not trying to ruin my rep when I only just got here Rio: I'm sure they aren't that bad Buster: What do you wanna bet? Rio: 😏 you're so rude Buster: & You're so polite Buster: It's why we're so good together Rio: Opposites attract, is it Buster: We're not total opposites either though Rio: No Rio: 'cos you reckon you're so perfect that'd just mean I'm shit and I think not Buster: 😂 Buster: You know you're on my level Rio: You've told me lots of times Buster: Believe me then Rio: I know I'm that bitch Rio: obviously Buster: Good 'cause I miss that bitch Buster: Obviously Rio: Yeah? Buster: Yeah Rio: I miss you too Rio: even if I really do want you to have a good time Buster: You can say that you'd rather we were having a good time together Rio: In an ideal world Buster: We can make it happen in this one Rio: We can Buster: As long as Drew doesn't hold you hostage Rio: 🙄 Rio: I doubt he's gonna appreciate all the cleaning I've done that hard Rio: which is rude, I agree Buster: He would've if he was there watching you do it Rio: Didn't pack the maid's outfit, like Buster: Gutted for him Rio: I'm sure Buster: How long are you staying? Rio: Not sure, depends if it's a one visit and done thing or they wanna keep tabs on them for longer Rio: once that's sorted, I'll see what I wanna do next Buster: When are they showing up? Rio: They don't exactly ring ahead, like Rio: don't have to let them in but that looks dodgy and if they need to they come back with police so Rio: the sooner we get this looking presentable and the story straight Rio: his stash is gone so that's the main thing Buster: That will have hit him where it really hurts Rio: Big time Rio: assumedly they've got shit in place, like it's at another dealers? Rio: I don't care, really Buster: He don't love anyone enough to flush it babe, even you Rio: 💔 Rio: Truly 😂 Rio: giveth and taketh so fast, you Buster: I can take my time too Rio: Man of many talents Buster: You know it Rio: Yeah Rio: not all of 'em yet, sadly Buster: Not even close Rio: Don't remind me Buster: Don't tell me you need a reminder Buster: I've thought about nothing else Rio: No Rio: me either Rio: which is very helpful when I've got all this shit to sort but Rio: not that mad Buster: I'm not that sorry Rio: What a surprise 😏 Buster: Only that I didn't get a chance to give you more to think about, like Rio: I didn't get to give you anything Buster: That's not true, I can make myself cum so hard whenever I'm reminded how you did for me Rio: Shit Rio: Buster Buster: Don't feel bad for me is all I'm saying Buster: I always want more, I'm used to that Rio: but Rio: I want to give you everything Rio: and I really want to touch you Buster: I want to give you everything too Buster: & Put more than just my fingers inside you Rio: Jesus Rio: I need you Rio: be here now, I'm bored Buster: I'm here Buster: Tell me what you need Rio: I need you to fuck me so hard I can't even think about anything that isn't you Buster: Touch yourself how I did it Buster: Right now, exactly like I want to Rio: Yes Rio: I haven't cum like that in Rio: ever Buster: It'll make you feel better Rio: You will Rio: you make me feel better Buster: I want you to feel good all the time Buster: That's the kind of god I am, babe Rio: Mine Buster: Fuck, that's such a turn on Rio: All I wanna do is worship you Buster: So do it Rio: You want me down on my knees for you? Buster: You know you look good like that Rio: Glad you think so Rio: it's for you Rio: [evidence] Buster: You're so fucking hot Rio: I am Rio: and wet Buster: I remember Rio: that's how I always am around you Buster: [sends his own evidence] Buster: That's how I always am for you Rio: Fuck Rio: like, my mouth is actually watering Rio: what the hell Buster: That reminds me, I didn't get to taste you Buster: Do it for me, yeah? Rio: I'll do whatever you ask me to Rio: you've got it like that Buster: Tell me what its like Buster: Make me miss you more Rio: I'm just so fucking ready, it would feel so good for you Rio: and it's so loud, I'm going as hard as you would and I can hear every thrust, it's just making me wanna go even deeper and Rio: it tastes almost as good as it feels but I wish I was tasting myself on your fingers Rio: or on your cock, after you came too, so I could taste us together Buster: I thought I couldn't want you any more than I already do & then I all read that Rio: want me the most okay Buster: There's nobody I've ever wanted as much as you Rio: Good Rio: I'm keeping it that way Buster: I'm keeping you Buster: For as long as you can keep up with me Rio: You doubt I can? Buster: No Rio: Don't Buster: I can't. I'm never wrong Rio: Not like that Rio: but this is all types of wrong Buster: It's not, it's right Buster: You feel it, I feel it Rio: It feels more than right Buster: I know Rio: I want more Buster: There has to be something in that flat that can give you what you need Buster: Let's think Rio: I can't Rio: you've gotta for me Buster: Alright, have you unpacked or are we totally relying on a cupboard search here? Rio: I've unpacked Rio: even if there was anything phallic lying about here, I wouldn't be rushing to put it inside me, no matter how bad I need it Buster: Cleanliness is next to godliness, babe Buster: We're aiming for heaven not hell Buster: How good is your toothbrush? Rio: This is why I'm keeping you around Rio: so many good ideas Rio: better be in the bathroom too now, in case one of them comes back Buster: Lock the door & take your time Rio: Like you're gonna with me when you come back Buster: That's the plan but since every fucker's had a different one & kept me waiting so long I swear I could cum before you've even touched me Buster: Ruining my rep Rio: that's so hot, baby Rio: seriously Rio: we're gonna have all the time we want so it won't matter Rio: I wanna know how bad you want me Buster: I want you so bad it actually hurts Buster: I always reckoned that was bullshit but I do Rio: it's so real Rio: being in a room with you was so fucking hard Buster: All I could think about was touching you & kissing you & how much I needed that from you even for a second Buster: That's still all I can think about, like Rio: Me too Rio: it was exhausting having to pretend otherwise Rio: still do with everyone else but you know now Buster: You're so fucking beautiful Buster: Everything you do is the most distracting thing Rio: You actually think that Rio: I can tell Buster: There's literally no point lying to you now, is there? Rio: Nope Rio: but I don't reckon anyone's called me that seriously Rio: especially not during Buster: If I can tell you to fuck yourself with a toothbrush seriously, I can tell you what I really think Rio: I guess you can Buster: There's nothing I can't do Buster: You know who I am Rio: I know you Buster: You need better boyfriends and a better substitute for me Rio: You want those to be one in the same or Buster: They'll never be the same Rio: Daddy Buster: Nobody will ever be as good as me but they should all do better than they are Rio: I'll tell them Buster: Demand it babe Buster: & If they aren't gonna tell you how perfect you are, I will Rio: God please Rio: you're making me so Buster: Finish your sentence, I wanna hear it Rio: I don't even know what you're making me Rio: I feel like I'm gonna explode Buster: I felt like that the whole drive, the whole fucking night, you know Buster: It'd be ridiculous if it was over anyone else Rio: Seriously Rio: this ain't me Rio: whatever you might've thought Buster: I know you too Buster: Even when I pretend I don't Rio: Yeah Rio: it's fucked 'cos of how much you ain't been here and all that time not talking but Rio: you do, more than most people Rio: somehow Buster: They see what they wanna see, babe Buster: But there ain't nothing wrong with looking at you how you are Buster: I want to so I do Buster: Give me the real version, I'll take it Rio: It's yours Buster: You mean that, I can tell Rio: I did Rio: not gonna argue when what you're saying is true Buster: What's truer still is how much I want you here instead of there Rio: You know I want that too Buster: & That if I bothered with wishes I'd use one not to be in a room full of people right now when none of them are you Rio: How are you even able to be around people right now Buster: Multitasking Rio: I'm not doing a good enough job clearly Buster: I've just had loads of time to get used to what being around you feels like, firstly & keeping it a secret, secondly Buster: Plus I couldn't opt out of this welcome bullshit Rio: Fair and fair Rio: you should be concentrating though Buster: I'm concentrating on what matters Rio: Actually a bit obsessed with you right now Rio: you win Buster: If I'm doing a good enough job, so do you Rio: You're not capable of doing anything but the best, baby Buster: Don't flatter me like that in public Buster: I nearly just Rio: sometimes I want you to just Rio: lose control, just a bit, just with me Rio: anyway, not flattery if it's true is it Buster: You know I want that more than anything, yeah? Rio: Yeah Rio: I will make it happen, just not right right now Rio: not the first impression you wanna make, is it Buster: It's the impression I wanna leave you with though Rio: Danger, yeah? Buster: Yeah Rio: You're gonna be the death of me, you know Buster: You can't get to heaven without that, baby Rio: Didn't say don't do it Rio: don't stop Buster: I won't if you don't Buster: Come on Rio: Was I meant to tell you when I came? Rio: 'cos I have, multiple times Buster: All the more reason to keep going Buster: Unless your new boyfriend is back, like Rio: I thought you might go if you knew I had Rio: and I don't want you to Buster: I don't want to Buster: This is boring, you're not Rio: I never am Rio: that's a promise I can make, easy Buster: Good Buster: Prove it then Rio: Alright Rio: your sound is off, yeah? Buster: What kind of amateur do you think I am? Rio: Not tryna get you into that much trouble before you even start there Rio: save that for later Rio: and watch this later when you can listen too for the full experience Rio: [vid] Buster: I have headphones I'll do it now Buster: Hold on Rio: Okay Buster: Oh fuck Buster: You really are proving yourself, aren't you? Rio: Just keeping up with you Buster: No argument here Rio: I like watching myself back Buster: The kids behind me better not be watching you too, I'll have to start a fight & get a rep for being turned on my punching lads Rio: 😂 Rio: You DO like punching things but Buster: Not this much Buster: You're gonna make me have to walk out, aren't you? Rio: Well, only you've got headphones on, remember Rio: you make the best noises Buster: You must really like watching yourself to be this good at filming yourself Buster: This is like next level Rio: Ain't the first time I've done it, put it that way Rio: when I've managed to get some time to myself Rio: gotta make the most Buster: Girl of many talents Rio: You're gonna make me blush Buster: You're doing worse to me Buster: Fucking hell Rio: I owed you Rio: debt not cleared yet either, like Buster: What do I have to do to get sent home from America? 'Cause believe me I'm tempted Rio: Let's have fun finding out, golden boy Buster: Alright Buster: Taking my headphones out would be a good start, like but you know me & sharing Rio: It's just for you Buster: You are Buster: You're mine Rio: Does saying that turn you on as much as hearing it does for me Rio: 'cos fuck Buster: Yeah it does Rio: It's true Buster: I'm biting my lip so hard right now Buster: There's gonna be blood in my mouth for you Rio: You're impossible Rio: how are you fucking every fantasy I've ever had rolled into one Buster: If you find out, ask how you're the best thing that ever happened to me, yeah? Rio: You must look so fucking good right now Rio: how has no one noticed Buster: Maybe someone has Buster: I'll find out when we're forced to do icebreakers later Rio: Lemme know, babe Buster: Are you sure you wanna? Rio: What you mean? Buster: You know what I mean Rio: Oh Rio: yeah Rio: don't Buster: Don't tell you or don't do it Rio: Don't tell me Rio: you can do what you want Rio: got a boyfriend, don't I Buster: No you don't Buster: Drew's more of a threat than he is Rio: So you keep saying Rio: it ain't like you're gonna go Rio: however long you're there Rio: without sex Buster: I told you, I can do anything Rio: and anyone, right Buster: If I want Rio: What do you want Buster: Dump your boyfriend then ask me Rio: It's not that easy is it Buster: Why not? Rio: He's Rio: it's hard to explain, really Buster: Try Rio: You've seen how he posts Rio: he's intense Rio: been hurt before bad, I don't need to be the next Buster: I can be intense Buster: & I can hurt him Rio: You don't need to Rio: I'm the one in the wrong Buster: Fine Rio: I want to Rio: I will Rio: I can't just fire him a text and pretend it's done to you Rio: I'm not trying to lie to you Buster: Yeah don't Rio: I'm not Rio: I ain't going to Rio: I'm sick of that Buster: Me too Rio: I'll sort it Buster: Take your time, I'm not coming back until summer Rio: Be married if I left it that long, Christ Buster: I already told you I'd stop the wedding Buster: Just don't have a kid, you'd be nearly ready to drop when I walk through the door Rio: No chance Rio: that'd be a nightmare Buster: You're 16 of course it would Rio: Yeah but specifically with him Rio: don't need that connection forever Rio: thank you Buster: I could kill him but I'd rather it didn't come to that for the sake of you not having him as a baby daddy Rio: I must be special Rio: could've just offered to win a custody battle for me Buster: Obviously Buster: Like you said, I enjoy punching shit Rio: You have that in common, actually Buster: Don't Buster: Never compare me to him Rio: Sorry Buster: There's no comparison Rio: I know that better than anyone Rio: promise Buster: You would tell me Buster: If you couldn't sort it Rio: Yeah Rio: It's not anything serious, don't worry Buster: Just know that I'd do anything for you Buster: If things ever get serious, with whoever or whatever Rio: You're really decent, you know Rio: not something I thought I'd be saying about you, honestly Rio: but you are Buster: Shut up Rio: Secret's safe with me Buster: It's not a secret, it's an untruth Rio: Not to me Buster: Like you said, you must be special then Rio: Maybe Buster: Definitely Buster: We all have to own what we are & what we're not Rio: Agreed Rio: so we're special, yeah? Buster: & Indecent Rio: Like the sound of that Buster: 😈 Rio: You can be my devil too Buster: Easily done Rio: Long as you want me to feel good still Buster: Forever then Rio: Deal Buster: Still not cutting my beautiful hand open to seal it though Buster: No offense, babe Rio: Other more fun ways to get blood from you Rio: I'll bite your lip instead Buster: One day I won't have to beat you to it Rio: I'll put it on my calendar Buster: Throw me a private party, yeah? Rio: You know I will Rio: everyone else can wait Rio: I'll have missed you most Buster: I can't wait to show you properly how much I want you Rio: I want you all summer, seriously Rio: don't make any plans Buster: Okay Rio: Do you know how fucking needy I'm gonna be by then Buster: Believe me, I know Buster: You haven't touched me & can't Rio: Baby Rio: tell me when you're alone again Rio: don't care what the time is Buster: Are you sure? It's still morning here, it'll be ages before they're done with this socialising bullshit Rio: Yeah Rio: It'll be weird sleeping here Buster: Alright Buster: You distract me, I'll distract you Rio: Another deal Buster: Yeah Rio: I'm not at school yet Rio: and fuck school anyway Buster: Fuck your school Buster: This one is epic Buster: It's like I'm in a film or some shit Rio: You're adorable Buster: Shut up Rio: I'm not taking the piss Rio: you are Buster: Adorable ain't the word, babe Rio: You like being called a nerd less Buster: So don't Rio: It's not a diss Buster: It ain't a compliment Rio: You told me not to when you're in public Buster: Well, maybe I've changed my mind Rio: Come on Rio: you know how hot I think you are Buster: You know I like hearing it Rio: I've lost count of how many times I've cum thinking about you today Buster: I've lost count of how many times I've had to stop myself Rio: You're gonna blow the biggest load when you do Rio: such a waste Rio: you'll have to show me at least Buster: They're giving us a break in a sec, you can have it then Rio: Yes please Buster: I don't need coffee, I need you Rio: I know you do Rio: So cum for me daddy, I want it, I wanna make you feel as good as you've made me Buster: Rio Rio: Buster Buster: I can't say it out loud until they let me out of here but I want to Rio: Will you Rio: record it so I can keep it Buster: Yeah Buster: It won't look as good as yours, I don't film myself as much as you but I will Rio: You should Rio: you're very pretty Buster: I know Rio: and hot Rio: it's rude Buster: It's about to benefit you Buster: Where do you want me to go? I've got 15 minutes Rio: Hmm Rio: there's got to be an empty classroom or something, no Buster: There's loads Buster: Hold on Rio: You should sit on the teacher's desk Buster: Good idea Rio: Only fitting Buster: There's so much shit on here Buster: Fuck's sake Rio: Push it to the floor Buster: Way ahead of you, I'm not trying to cum all over someone's homework Rio: A new spin on the old excuse Rio: but I'm not trying to be jealous of someone's homework, tah Buster: That was loud though, if anyone heard that I could get sent home sooner than we expected Buster: I'm not gonna stop now, I can't Rio: As much as I want you here your parents would actually kill me Rio: gotta be a good boy, even when you're being really bad Buster: They'd kill me, they don't know its your fault Buster: Nobody knows what you do to me & what you make me wanna do Rio: It's just for us Buster: If I could I'd tell everyone how good you are, you deserve all the credit for getting me this worked up this fast Rio: you'll just have to give me extra credit, yeah Rio: like you said, maybe the kids behind you know how good I am too Rio: can brag if it helps your rep Buster: So you hate it when I brag unless its about you, yeah? Rio: I don't hate it Rio: just when you brag to me Buster: I'll be good, like you told me to, don't worry Rio: Believe it when I see it, boy Buster: It's recording, be patient Rio: Fine Rio: as I don't have to be THAT patient Buster: It's hot when you're this impatient Rio: That's why you left it years then, yeah? Buster: That & I needed to practice my kissing, obviously Rio: 😏 Rio: I like kissing you Buster: Yeah? Buster: I've got good lips, I remember Rio: You've got good everything Rio: s'rude Buster: You'll feel differently when you can do whatever you want to me for as long as you want Rio: yeah Rio: hope so Rio: I remember you said I could have one for every day so you'll have to crack on right away, like Buster: You can do the maths on 7 months worth of days whenever you miss me Rio: What day do you come back? Buster: 1st, same as when I left Rio: 213 then Rio: no pressure Buster: Firstly, I thrive under pressure & secondly, it's really how fast you worked that out Buster: hot* Buster: It'll be easy Buster: We've got all summer Rio: Good thing too, some people might not appreciate being made to work their summer Rio: and shut up Buster: Make me Buster: I actually need you to so I don't get caught Rio: You're so fucking Rio: but it's just for me Rio: we're gonna be pros at not getting caught by the end of the summer Buster: I'm not a pro yet though so come here & keep me quiet, it's the least you can do when it's your fault I'm being this loud Rio: All the ways I could keep you quiet Rio: hmm, which would be most fun Buster: Think fast Buster: Or everyone's gonna know your name Rio: Yeah, 'cos that's not what I want at all Buster: Please Buster: Help me out here, like Rio: Fuck Rio: Okay baby Rio: you just need something you can bite on harder than your lip Buster: Good thing I'm on a teacher's desk surrounded by pens & pencils Buster: Better go with the latter to not get shit loads of ink in my mouth if I bite too hard Rio: Be really cute but more of a giveaway Rio: show me the damage after Buster: I've done that before but never for this reason Buster: It takes ages to get rid Rio: Fuck's sake Rio: you're killing me Buster: It's mutual baby Rio: Yeah Rio: it really is Buster: I'll buy you a new toothbrush, I promise Rio: 😂 thanks, babe Rio: battery died ages ago Buster: Fuck that, I'll buy you something better to play with then Rio: Really? Buster: Land of the free, home of the brave Buster: Spoilt for choice Rio: Don't try and bring back anything too big, they will search your bag, like Buster: I'll get it sent to you, you shouldn't have to wait for everything Rio: You're so good to me Buster: You're just so good, full stop Rio: I wanna be Rio: for you Buster: You are Buster: & You're mine anyway Rio: I'm yours, Buster Buster: Shit Buster: Well, that did it Buster: You did Rio: 🤤 Rio: Gimme gimme Buster: Hold on, I gotta clean up in case I've also gotta run Rio: Good idea Rio: why you need me there Buster: A box of tissues is no replacement, babe Rio: Sweetest thing anyone's ever said to me Buster: I aim to please Rio: mhmm and I give you somewhere else to aim Buster: If you turn me on again, I swear to god Buster: There ain't enough pencils or tissues in this room Rio: Best behaviour 🤐🤞 Buster: Though losing my voice would get me out of icebreakers Buster: Maybe I should let you Buster: I could just be the strong, silent type all day Rio: 😏 A mood Buster: All the American girls I've met so far would love it, they never shut the fuck up Rio: 😂 Rio: you don't even have to pretend to listen, trust Buster: I won't Buster: I'll be too busy tuning the accent out Rio: At least the school is good, like Buster: This desk is pretty comfortable, yeah Buster: I'll give 'em that Buster: We probably wouldn't even break it Rio: Be fun to try though Buster: Fun ain't the word Rio: They gonna teach you any new words over there Rio: Probably won't spell or say 'em right, remember Buster: 😂 Buster: I'll teach 'em where they're going wrong Rio: If you're offering diction lessons, I don't wanna know Buster: It'd only make me homesick Buster: Say what you like about Chelsea girls but when they talk dirty to you, it makes up for a multitude of other sins Rio: Shut up Rio: idiot Buster: [drops vid like don't be mad at me ILY lol] Rio: Nice save Buster: Better than nice, you'll see Rio: Someone's back Rio: gonna have to wait Buster: Tell your man, I said hello Rio: Hilarious Buster: Not joking or laughing, like Rio: Don't start this again Buster: I never stopped Rio: Well I don't know what you want me to say Buster: Tell me that you know this is a bad idea but you're doing it anyway Buster: Be honest Rio: I know Drew is a bit Rio: well, Drew Rio: but he wouldn't do that and more importantly, I wouldn't Rio: Indie needs me Buster: Rio, come on Buster: Don't act like that's one line he wouldn't cross Rio: He's known me forever Rio: literally Buster: & He treats everyone else he knows so well, yeah? Buster: Why does Indie need you? 'Cause he's a selfish cunt Rio: I'm not saying that Rio: or disputing that he is Rio: it's not like this is an endorsement of him Rio: I'm just saying he really is not gonna wanna fuck someone he's known since they were an actual baby Buster: I've known you that long, what's the difference? Rio: You're the same age, it's different Rio: he would've been our age, old enough to remember it all Buster: He acts like he's our age still Rio: Yeah Rio: I mean, it must be shit Rio: all your friends get wifed up really early Rio: like, are you planning to be grown up by the time your 30? Buster: Is he planning to be grown up by the time his kids are, more like Buster: That's what's shit Buster: For them Rio: It's a shit situation Rio: always has been Buster: Just be careful, okay? Rio: Of course Rio: don't worry Buster: Don't make me Rio: I'm not Rio: I won't Buster: Good Rio: 👍 Buster: Do you have to go? Rio: I can stay Rio: we've not got school for another 2 days so Rio: just doing stuff here Buster: At least when Indie's in school it ain't your job to stop her from almost killing her classmates Rio: Well, in theory Rio: teachers don't do fuck all, do they Buster: Mine just kick you out at the first sign of anything less than perfection Buster: Stricter when it's posher Rio: 'Course Rio: but you can pay to be there no matter how thick you are Rio: look at our politicians, half of 'em went to oxford Buster: No argument Buster: It worked for Nance, who can't even read Rio: Don't be a dick Buster: It's a fact Rio: Not really and you don't have to point things out just 'cos they're true, you know Buster: You don't have to hide from things just 'cause you don't want them to be true either Buster: I bet she loves it there anyway, the playing field's well levelled, no fucker's reading Rio: 🙄 You're such a snob Buster: Fuck off Rio: What, you blatantly are Buster: If I was a snob, I wouldn't like you, would I? Rio: Oh wow, so nice of you to stoop to my level Buster: It ain't my fault you're trying so hard not to be on mine Rio: Whatever, like Buster: You're not working class, like Rio: You're the one chatting that I am Buster: 'Cause you try so hard to be Buster: Only when it suits you though Rio: Do I Rio: well ain't that exactly what you applaud yourself for Rio: adapting and overcoming, all that bullshit Buster: 'Cause that's what I do Buster: You think you can have your cake, eat it & then judge me for my fucking choices Rio: It isn't judging you to point out when you're being a dick Buster: A snob is a pejorative term Buster: & Yet you're the one thinking you're superior to me 'cause you chat council but spend like you're from Chelsea Rio: Are you serious? Rio: Oh my God Rio: you said I can't read and I'm lucky you give me the time of day Rio: if that's how I'm meant to behave 'cos my parents have money then I'd rather fake it the other way, thanks Buster: Nah, I said my sister can't & she must be loving your shit school Buster: Which is how you've described it loads of times Buster: You're smart, don't be stupid Rio: Have you asked her yourself Rio: as you're so interested Buster: Why are you asking me a question you already know the answer to? Buster: I said, don't be stupid Rio: Prove a point Buster: What's your point? She don't wanna talk to me, that's been proven loads of times Rio: Are you trying Buster: Trying to what, change her mind? Buster: Why would I wanna Rio: Because you wanna talk to her, obviously Buster: I don't Rio: Alright Buster: Is it? Or do you wanna judge me for that as well? Rio: Oh shut up Buster: Don't tell me to shut up Rio: I will Rio: you've called me stupid plenty of times, you've earnt it Buster: You've been stupid, you aren't Buster: That's why it's frustrating Rio: I'm not a child Buster: Don't be childish then Rio: I'd quit whilst you were vaguely ahead if I were you Buster: I'm not a quitter, babe. You've got the wrong twin Rio: Do you want to talk about her or not? Buster: I'm not talking about her, I'm talking about me Rio: Sure Rio: that's what your icebreakers are for Buster: I'll go do 'em then Buster: You've made your point Rio: Okay Rio: Enjoy then Buster: I'll do my best Rio: No doubt Buster: Shouldn't be Rio: You're arguing for the sake of now Buster: You're winding me up for the sake of Rio: I'm not that bored Rio: busy, busy Buster: Then stop Buster: Or fuck off Buster: One or the other Rio: If that's what you want Buster: It's what I said Rio: I said go have fun Buster: Fine Rio: Don't be moody Buster: Don't make me Rio: I ain't done anything Buster: Bullshit Buster: You're always doing something Buster: I miss you Rio: you think I don't miss you too Rio: I miss you loads, actually and it's fucking Buster: I want you so bad Buster: I can't do this Buster: Months of it Rio: There's no alternative though Rio: we have to Buster: I know, fuck's sake, I know Buster: I'm just jetlagged or whatever Buster: Forget it Rio: Yeah Rio: sure, fine by me Buster: It is fine & I can do anything Rio: I never said you couldn't Rio: it'll be alright Buster: I'll cum in this classroom again & get over it Buster: Who else am I, like? Rio: Buster, it's okay Rio: it's a totally new experience, it's fine to feel overwhelmed, doesn't mean you won't ace it Buster: Don't Rio: Okay Rio: but it's true Buster: It's not, there is no out of my depth Rio: Not the word I used Rio: and not what I meant Rio: moving and starting something new is hectic Rio: even if you can handle it Buster: Like I said, I thrive under pressure Buster: There's nothing I can't handle Rio: Exactly, they wouldn't have chosen you otherwise, would they Buster: I know you think I just paid my way here Rio: No I don't Buster: If I think I'm better, it's 'cause I am Buster: 'Cause I put in the work to be Rio: Literally never tried to take that away from you Rio: just saying you don't have to call me or your sister thick to prove that Rio: there's plenty of proof already, yeah? Buster: I'd never call you thick 'cause I'm never wrong Buster: You're really smart Rio: You don't need to do that now Rio: like you said, you work hard Rio: I don't Buster: You can still do anything Buster: Whatever you want Buster: Just like I can Rio: I know Rio: just priorities Rio: not everyone wants the same shit Buster: There's no limits, that's all I'm saying Buster: Nance ain't the same Buster: She's never been Rio: I'm sure she still has plans Buster: She has to, she may have left but there's no escaping mum & dad Buster: It's not the same as being self motivated Rio: No Rio: but maybe she's alright with that Rio: or maybe she ain't Rio: but what can you do Rio: self-motivation for a reason, like Buster: She does what she does to please them, I do what I do to please myself Buster: There's plenty I could do if she let me Rio: She'll find her thing Buster: Not if she keeps jacking everything in as soon as it gets hard Rio: That's not what leaving London was about Rio: come on Buster: Yeah it was Buster: She gave up Rio: She was being really badly bullied Rio: nothing is worth living like that day in day out Rio: especially if you don't even want it for yourself Buster: She let it get to that Rio: She couldn't control that Rio: that's on the people who were doing it Buster: She could've Buster: Just take it back from them Rio: Just take it, you mean Rio: she's not you, is she Buster: No, just stop it Buster: There's a way to stop anything Rio: Not be gay, not be shy, not be herself Rio: she could've but maybe she was over not having anything she wanted Rio: if she's already got to live for your parents in one way, why live for people who would still probably hate her anyway as well Buster: Those are all excuses, they did it to her 'cause they could. Simple as Rio: There's obvious reasons why they picked on her and not you, alright Rio: and I'm sorry but no, just being strong would not stop it Rio: nothing is about you is a target where you live, you can't get it Rio: you fit, she didn't Buster: They'd pick on me if I was a pussy Buster: But I made myself fit Rio: Well she didn't want to then, can be simple as that Buster: You think I wanted to day 1 when we moved there? Buster: Fuck that Rio: I'm sure you didn't Rio: she needed an out and she took the first she could Rio: you're working for yours Buster: She didn't work for hers Buster: She never works for anything Rio: She went through a lot of shit, though Buster: Woe's her then Rio: I'm just saying Buster: Look where you are & what for Buster: Everyone's going through it Buster: She ain't special Rio: Yeah, of course Rio: I'm not saying she's the only one who has or is going through bullshit Rio: I know you did too Buster: I didn't & don't mean me Buster: I'm not struggling, never have done Buster: Like you said, obvious reasons Rio: You want me to agree like I believe that? Rio: Reasons you just had different problems Rio: rich boys aren't exempt, they just get lots less sympathy for theirs Buster: There ain't no reason for you to disagree or disbelieve Buster: I can barely play the dead brother card 'cause he weren't one Buster: Got not even a day's mileage out of that Rio: You're not allowed to talk about it, I remember Buster: There's nothing to talk about anyway, he's just a name, didn't get to be anything else Rio: He existed for 9 months before that Rio: I know it doesn't start the day they pop out Buster: Not to me, I was a kid, what did I care? Buster: That's my mum's grief not mine Rio: You weren't that young Buster: A lad then, what does it matter Rio: You were allowed to grieve Rio: you still are Buster: Like I said, for what? Buster: It ain't as if I'm an only child Rio: For what he coulda been, who Buster: That'd be like grieving for who I reckon my sister should be Buster: Not gonna have a candlelit vigil for her backbone Rio: You can do Rio: think it's considered a bit insensitive to hold a funeral for her 'just 'cos she's not gonna have the husband and 2.5 kids these days but I'll keep it on the dl Buster: We don't know who he would've been & we never will Buster: It's a waste of time Rio: Yeah Rio: It's a big waste of time and you can't do anything about it Buster: Why do you want me to be powerless? Like is that a turn on for you or what? Buster: I don't want your fucking pity, alright Rio: I don't and no it's not Rio: I told you, you won't get any Buster: Good Buster: Maybe you reckon I should be fucked up but I ain't Buster: Gutted to burst your bubble though Rio: Why would I want that Buster: You tell me Rio: I don't Rio: so I've got no idea Buster: Then stop chatting like I have all these issues Rio: I just said you can Rio: not that you do Buster: Well, cheers for your permission in that case Rio: Any time Buster: I have to go Rio: Okay then Rio: talk to you later Buster: Yeah

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