#guess what they didnt work either

[caffeinatedopossum]

Why are there always new symptoms showing up?? I just want a fucking break ;-;

#hello and on todays episode of wtf is wrong with resident hypochondriac opossum #i think maybe im extremely dehydrated and cant absorb fluids properly from drinking them (i think this for a variety of reasons) #and its starting to become very concerning and i think i need iv fluids like asap but i have no insurance #and also if i did theyd think i was crazy and not treat me condescend me and possible even admit me to inpatient msntal health #also having severe pain in my throat spreading to my skull that feels like someone jabbing me from the inside #which could be a sign of a compressed nerve so that fun /s #jesus christ im so tired i need a break i need this to stop #the pain alone is making me dizzy #and making me sweat which is dehydrating me more #ive tried everything i can think of and nothings working #i drink plenty ive cut out caffiene before i drink electrolyte drinks i make sure i eat enough salt etc etc #and its NEVER enough #oh yeah cant forget the compression socks and two different meds i tried to help me not pass put #guess what they didnt work either #and now im worried that my dehydration might be causing my hallucinations because they arent typical for psychosis #and maybe even my seizures which is really really bad #like i could go into a coma and die if i continue this way bad #but like that cant possibly be whats going on right? surely im just exaggerating because of anxiety #theres no way itd be that bad #my gf is basically a doctor and she would've done something by now if it was that bad #but hhh #why do i feel like this #why else do my hallucinations get worse whenever i sweat or exercise #why else do i have an extremely fast heart rate and fainting and im thirsty all the time but the second i drink i have to go pee already

[ganondoodle]

sorry about that last rambling post, i didnt mean to sound like its worse than it may be, but i got no ... lense to view it through but my own, and the main reason i wrote it out anyway was bc i needed to get it out (even if posting it might be not the greatest idea) .. and bc it kinda showcases, i think, how my stories kinda write themselves, involuntarily in a way? its not like im not putting in any effort- but its like .. i cant STOP it always keeps going and even the dumbest idea stays in some form, its very hard to get everything in place bc theres so much going on all the while i am very slow at making anything, writing or drawing anything, especially anythign coherent is very hard bc not only do i get constantly distracted, i get distracted by my own thoughts suddendly skipping to a certain scene and me having to go throguh imagining in detail NO MATTER how many times i have done it before for the same scene that i already decided on how it goes, when theres a new idea it can take over my entire day bc i cant let go of it-

not trying to sound either like im the only that has that sort of problem, but i think its a big part as of why i start tso many projects without being able to finish them, or even start them bc i constantly have to fight my own thoughts from derailing into another daydream session, thinking of too much too fast than i can ever draw or even write about and not knowing what is worthwhile and what isnt (im telling you i have no idea what is good and what isnt, idk why but for all i know all things i do could be trash, or they all could be bad, maybe the one i thinnk is decent is actually worse than the things i deem not good enough and once i start to think no this isnt good enough i stop having fun making or thinking it bc im trying to do better

honestly its kind of impressive that i can get anything out at all, not to pat myself on the back there but even if i hate how long it takes me, considering how much im having to work just to start working on something at all, the fact that i could post stuff coherent enough for some people to understand AND LIKE is something i should be a little more proud of

#ganondoodles talks #personal #sorry today is a bit of a brain fart day #got a headache and have wasted the entire time until now (5pm) with watching old analysis videos i have watched 5 times already #and crying over undertales music #how much could i get done if i didnt have to deal with thought trains going 200 above speed limit #also didnt mean to sound mean to people who like the things i deem cringy #BC I DONT KNOW WHAT IM TALKIGN ABOUT 90% OF THE TIME #I DONT KNOW IF ITS GOOD maybe it is #my judgement of my own stuff is pretty random #.... maybe thats why i can work with fanstuff that adheres to lore better #bc it sets limits for me #it gives me options of rails to derail onto without falling straight into the woods #idk if that made sense either #... i need to start drinking more #(and i guess by calling some of my stuff cringe bc i am entirely unsure of its quality im trying to make myself smaller than i am) #(so if it turns out to be actually bad- im more safe from ridicule since LOOK I AM SELF AWARE) #and there i go letting my thoughts spin further #maybe ill delete both of these posts tomorrow when i realize how dumb this is to say in the first place

[1tsjusty0u]

zelda is done. so dirty sometimes

#like. either A her things are attributed to link (ive seen a comic where rhoam scolding zelda for her failures was made to be a comic about #link and like. he wasnt even talking to him!!!!!!!!! theres other ways you can show that and other ways that include rhoam considering he w #as on the great plateau but They Didnt??? and also silent princesses and such but thats a ship thing i think? #or B they blame her for things that literally were not her fault and she couldnt do anything about #(seen someone in a theory video blame zelda for everyone dying because ‘link using the shekiah slate would open the shrines. is she stupid’ #paraphrasing but that was the gist. shrines dont even work that way theyre just Wrong #or sometimes shes made out to be stupid in general #like listen. im not a zelda character fan. i dont love her and i dont hate her. but Come On #you dont have to be obsessed with her or even focus on her in what you make just . Respect her i guess #it feels weird to say because shes a character. however i dont know how else to say it

[misspickman]

My unpopular bg3 opinion is they tried way too hard to make some of these characters mean and flippant which is meant to make the player more interested in them and clearly this has worked on many (good for you !) but personally i could not care less. If 80% of what a character has to say to me is bitchy i will simply leave them at camp for most of the game

#Is this a skill issue of mine yeah maybe. I just find it annoying #At best and off-putting at worst like is there no better way to show that shadowheart is going through stuff/have her be mean that isnt #Her getting pissy that you have respect for a bunch of dead slaves #That was wild. I didnt ask her either she just had the need to let me know she thinks these slaves aint shit bc they didnt fight back #Thanks larian! #Wild take maybe idk but i dont think that makes her interesting i think it makes her off-putting. In this case #I generally like shadowheart this just sure is a thing to have her say. And not give the player an option to respond in any way #Ill get over this single line but im mad now. This isn't the only instance of this #I guess both larian and bioware think that characters thinking slavery is kinda ok is not a deal breaker #Txt #I know that these characters soften during the game. I have played a fair amount of it. I did shadowhearts quest i know whats up. Still #In both her and astarions case i think theyre written to have some wild takes on whats Ok to do that get kinda swept under the rug #if you manage to shove them in a Good direction. But u dont. Actively see them grapple with any of it #They just suddenly go wow im better now. Yay. I suddenly dont want to enslave other people for my power (in astarions case) #Like this switch flipped bc of my one roll? Idk. Im not super convinced #I know this is how the game works. I just think it could have been written better

[sisterofoblivion]

Spoilers, maybe? Not for TYBW but for OG.

Anyways.

I haven't seen the episode yet, but I've seen the screen shots and panels. The thought of him dying is deeply upsetting. He's been my favorite since I started watching Bleach.

Just... what if he succeeded? What if Gin was successful?

#bleach #gin ichimaru #rangiku matsumoto #sosuke aizen #I'm finally working my way through bleach because someone's death was something i didnt want to accept #consequently #i learned about another favorite's death #and i dont want to see either #what if #gin lived #or #juushiro lived #spoilers? i guess? #probably should have put that first but #idk hopefully anyone looking at these tags either knows or hates Gin at least

[brainrotdotorg]

oh today is just going to be a problem huh.

#mom texted me to explicitly say that she didnt like that i dont have a job yet (in the middle of finals seasons) #and said she would be embarrassed if i told my parents i was planning on working at a mall/not furthering my career #i applied to office places and shit like that that she would approve of but guess what! #none of them fucking got back to me! #i told her i have an interview today but she didnt care because she doesnt want me to work retail #bitch i dont want to work retail either. what is your problem #then she told me about a cousin she knows who already has a n internship #im at the end of my rope here im not going to lie. #so glad i have a counseling appointment tomorrow

[jonny-b-meowborn]

Guess who fucked her wrists up during work because he refused to go on a single break because he felt like that's the only way to prove she's not useless since her autism stops her from doing anything a person his age "should" do

#its me. if you couldn't guess #i did that #i didnt do any actual damage to my wrists but they are in pain and i can already feel that its gonna get worse #and ill probably have an awful time trying to sleep because of it #and look. #i know that im not useless #i know that prople who have similar or bigger struggles aremt useless either #i dont believe that anyone's worth depends on having a job or being productive or whatever #i do know that #but sometimes even when you know something you dont feel it #yknow what i mean #and this blueberry plantation is the only job i can have right now #im not built for a dayjob but im able to work for a few hours with saplings every now and then #though that is. very physically tiring #which is also extra frustrating to me as a young person #because the other older ladies at the job always make me feel like im not allowed to be tired or in pain because im young #so i never say that im tired until im alone w my mom #and i want to prove that im not a useless parasite. i can do some work. so i might as well give my all #and dont take any breaks #im not trying to excuse hurting myself #but you know. its hard to think straight and respect myself sometimes #sometimes its easier to hurt myself in ways that make other people think good of me #im treating myself to some snacks now tho #gonna go buy myself some chips and smoke s cigarette and watch silly videos and play games and go to bed #and yes i know that being kind to myself after i was cruel to myself doesnt fix that #i shouldn't have the mindset of #yeah im being unnecessarily cruel to myself but at least im gonna reward myself later :) #but y'know what can you do #(go to therapy i should go to therapy) #bee buzz

[lizeon]

wth why would i suddenly not be able to watch a live stream on youtube? i dont think its an adblocker thing? i was watching a different live stream like 2 hours ago, i can watch regular videos and vods. but now when i bring up a stream it just goes gray and says "Your browser cant play this video". never seen this and having a hard time finding an answer online that is about a live stream, everything so far is for videos that dont work for anyone else either

#tried to bring it up on my tablet but that just didnt load the page at all like its not connected to the internet but it is #but i can watch the stream just fine on my phone on mobile firefox #weird. really really weird. #like i even had the tab up earlier while waiting for it to start. but then the extension to put tabs to sleep put it to sleep and #when i went back suddenly this is happening on all livestreams ive checked #opened in a different tab group and private mode. same problem #chat still works tho lol #maybe i'll try turning off the tab sleep ext?? hmm #my phone's at like 32% but also its after midnight so i probably wont watch the whole stream #(i say like i dont end up watching full streams everytime i go ''i'll just watch for a few minutes'' #and also octavio is so adorable and funny and he's making a puppet that is already cursed) #anyway i'll either keep looking online or trying turning off that other extension or ill give up and just plug in my phone haha #eta: hey hey... guess..... guess what i did.... i watched that whole stream.... #and then another hour long one after it..... this is why i didnt watch live streams for so long #i cant just watch ''for a few minutes'' #then a few months ago i got sucked into the tempus rabbit hole and look where i am now #tanking my sleep schedule once again it is 3am -.-

[syrips]

me: -reading i, strahd again-

strahd: resisting to drink blood is so hard. very hard difficult sad vampire noises here.

me: man. good thing i never have to go through that, cant relate-

me: -has ocd and trich-

#sometimes i like to cope by pretending strahd would help me with my compulsions/repetitions #hed be like ouhh i shall help you master and control your hunger my little vampire spawn #or idk what hed call me #either way it helps #i guess imagining resisting durge vibes would work too #id make a terrible vampire #me saying 'just one more neck' while strahd tries his best to not look disappointed #me: hold on SIR THAT NECK DIDNT FEEL RIGht- just one more #strahd: -staring at the three dozen corpses scattered around me- #rahadin: -using a cheap broom as he sighs in overworked and underpaid-

[dykefaggotry]

speaking of the mechanic. we've been carless for a week bc the check engine light came on and it stopped reversing (& would reverse again after sitting for a few minutes) but today we took it to the mechanic and the mechanic said w the type of car it is it's almost guaranteed to be $1.3-3k (depending on the issue)

as soon as we turn her on in the parking lot the check engine light was off and it was reversing fine i'm like

she got scared straight..........

#either way we cannot afford 3 thousand fucking dollars so idk we're gonna get my gfs dad to run a lil diagnostic tool thing he has on it #to see if it can identify the issue #but if it is what the mechanics thought (they didnt look at it just hearing the car model and the issue it's having) #there is no way we can afford 3k so we will simply drive her until she stops working i guess lmfaoooo

[piratecrew]

i know its like. the whole joke. that crowley gave them a shitty dorm and acted like hes a generous person. but he’s actually going to hell 😭😭 like thats a fucking safety hazard and you put two kids in there with no adult supervisors besides the ghosts who tried to attack them the first time they met

#hammah.txt #I guess the other dorms dont have adult supervision either but at least the dorm heads have a basic understanding of how the laws of this #world works… yuu didnt even know what magic was and grim was probably an outcast from human AND monster society considering he has no family

[caffeinatedopossum]

It's kind of jarring to be reminded that everyone around me has always had more than me (aside from a select few). Like I just forget until it comes down to something mundane like buying shoes and I don't know my shoe size because for most of my life I've had one pair of shoes that I wear until they break. And it was usually something someone either got me as a gift (horrified that my shoes were wearing out. As if thats not what shoes do when you wear them) or they were passed down and I grew into them.

Like that's just normal for me. It doesn't bother me either, this isn't a pity party. It's just surreal that it bothers other people sometimes

#i don't really feel like ive been that poor either #most of the things i needed and didnt get were things me/my family could have afforded but refused to #i figured 'if I'd rather save up my money to get some new coloring books than to buy some new shoes i probably dont need them that bad' #maybe those are decisions they havent had to make #i cant be jealous because i cant imagine what thats like #i simply cant imagine it #oof now im remembering the only time i actually had to ask for new shoes and i didnt #i was growing out of my shoes and getting blisters from it but i kept putting off getting new shoes #because idk i guess it just didnt bother me that much until it started to hurt really bad #and i didnt want to ask my mom for anything either because yeah #she was the type of parent you dont ask for things from #eventually someone else noticed and said something along the lines of 'if you dont get him new shoes then i will' to my mom #and then she got mad that i didnt tell her? #it was all so confusing to me then but i understand why now. she just wanted to hide the neglect. she didnt really care about anything else #its why everything was fine and she never thought i needed anything until someone else said something about it #even with my eating disorder... she knew what i was doing but she didnt interfere until someone else told her i looked sick #but that wasnt until years after the problem started. funny how that works isnt it

[toastsnaffler]

i keep getting irrationally miffed at ppl 😐😐

#'impressed by how much u can talk abt this considering youve not played either game' #fuck off. as if im not just trying to show interest bc u + another friend are both into them + constantly talk abt them in our gc!! #i mean since u guys talk abt them all the time + theyre huge on tumblr like. it would be hard for me to not know anything abt them at all #literally what else can i talk to u guys abt anyway. i dont think there are any interests i personally have that they both gaf abt #if anything they actively dislike most of the things im hyperfixated on. or at least she does so like i cant bring that up can i. #all i did was share a post i saw on tumblr that i thought was funny. its not like i had some negative/controversial opinion #i just saw it and thought hey that makes me think of my friends bc they like those things maybe theyll find it funny too!! #dog sitting outside the door with rly big sad eyes offering them a stick i found in a puddle #i like listening to them talk and i will eventually play some of the games theyre into myself cuz they make them sound rly cool #and even if theyre not my kind of thing i like sharing interests with other ppl and sometimes thats enough for me to be able to enjoy it #i literally own some of them already but im just not in the mental space to start smth new right now. which i have SAID!!!! #why do u even care girl. as if u dont already have a ton of friends playing it that ur talking to abt it???? i wont have anything to add #and thats not gonna stop u from being able to talk to me abt it anyway????? like 2/3 of our conversations atm are abt bg3 #man. i know its not that deep but it makes me kinda sad for some reason. im just trying. i guess next time ill just let u guys talk- #to each other or at me and not comment or say anything so u can pretend im not here or whatever it is u want #ughh. she probably didnt even mean it like that and ill feel stupid for getting annoyed and delete this later but whatever. #might work out early today and then i can like draw or play a game or smth the rest of the day. alright lets go #.vent #listening to my silly little jfunk/jazz/soul playlist and i already feel over it. healing

[juicedbeetle]

i like to think post-canon beej would try really hard to make the netherworld a place where you don't have to feel alone anymore

#beetlejuice musical #beetlejuice #headcanon #not sure if he takes juno's work because i think he already tried and was unhappy with it. i dont thiiiink hes in charge but #im not entirely sure how the netherworld works either. i was under the impression all the people we meet in what i know now were just- #in Waiting. like beej at the end of the movie? waiting to move on #and the only ppl who inhabit the netherworld are inborne or however u spell it. the born dead. the demons. and breathers get to move on? #but hmmm im not sure!! it's always shifting in my mind #either way miss argentina said every1 in the netherworld is alone and beej also felt super alone and ''hes the loneliest guy ive ever met'' #etc etc so IM thinking no matter what. he wants to change that :) now that he can #what beej really wanted deep down was to be able to change things!! both him and lydia felt stuck and unable to change anything #he is happy. he got what he wanted... he was able to go back home and change things... #i do still like to think he can visit the deetzmaits whenever he likes. im not sure how he gets back to the netherworld tho #just use the door? hm yea i guess. i mean lydia could cross it and she wasnt recently deceased so i guess the point is he didnt WANT to

[corvidcall]

Did you ever tell the story of why ******* kicked you out because she forgot to pick you up from work on here? I remember it happening in real time and it was not funny but in retrospect, it's 200 upvotes on reddit material lol

LMAO its so funny you censored her name. like shes gonna be here or something. cant let her know i still think shes a bitch!!!!!

anyway heres fun little anecdote about that time i was forced to move out, in the style of an aita post, fake names and all

AITA for being mad at my roommate for not driving my somewhere?

I (22nb) live with two roommates, Makenzie (22f) and Justin (19 trans m). We all met because we worked at the same place, and we've been living together for almost a year. Of the three of us, I'm the only one who has lived with roommates before, but I can't tell if I'm being TA here?

Makenzie is the only one of us who can drive, and she agreed when we moved in together that, if we gave her some money to buy her mom's car, then she would drive us places whenever she was able. I work a little over a mile away from our apartment, so I CAN walk, but since I get off work at around 9pm, and the sidewalks aren't really well-maintained (it's a really industrial part of town, so it's not GREAT for walking), she agreed that she would pick me up after work every day.

Last week, I got off work, and waited for her to show up, and she never came. I texted her a few times, and when she didn't respond after I'd been waiting for almost an hour, I texted that I would be walking home. Apparently, she'd fallen asleep, and midway through my walk home, she woke up, got in her car, and tried to come find me to drive me home. She couldn't find me (the sidewalk is really hard to see from the road, and it's extremely dark, so I'm not surprised), and then frantically tried to get a hold of me to make sure I wasn't dead. I didn't see her texts because I was 1. walking and 2. on the phone with my partner. When I got home, she was pissed that I made her worry. She thinks I did it on purpose to get revenge? I told her I was just busy, and she seemed to accept that, but today she and our other roommate sat me down and told me that I needed to find a new place to live, because "this wasn't working out."

According to her, I'm not entitled to a ride anywhere, so I had no right to be mad at her for not giving me a ride, and I certainly didn't have a right to make her think I was dead (I literally told her I was walking home??). She also brought up that I never do my chores on the chore wheel (she made the chore wheel without asking. She just announced that she'd made a chore wheel and I had to clean the living room, which I'm almost never in anyway) and that I owe her $200 (from when we adopted our cat, which I think is weird to bring up when you're trying to kick me out?? it's not like I'm gonna get to keep the cat). She's saying I'm entitled and inconsiderate, but I feel like she's punishing me for the fact that she flaked. AITA?

Edit: If it helps, she's flaked on rides before. A few months ago, she agreed to take me to the doctor, and then the day before my appointment, she told me she couldn't give me a ride. The reason she flaked was because she wanted to go to the weed dispensary instead :/ she said it was fine, because "your mom will just get you an uber anyway". My mom agreed to pay all my necessary expenses while I'm in school (I'm a full time student; she pays my rent and I use the money from my part time job to pay for my food) but she's not like. Rich. I don't feel good about just spending her money on stuff I don't have to.

UPDATE: Makenzie made a post on Facebook about how "it's so sad when someone would rather lose a friendship than admit they were wrong." I shouldn't have commented, but I did, asking her if she forgot we were facebook friends, and then I blocked her. In retrospect, I should have just blocked her without commenting, but I'm only human.

UPDATE 2: Well, I'm moving out. Justin started harassing me, accusing me of stealing his shampoo and letting the cat loose on purpose, neither of which I did. I have my own nicer shampoo, and I love cats (I just was asleep when he told me the cat was missing, because it was midnight and I wake up at 6 am to go to school. I guess the fact that I didn't immediately leap to my feet to find our cat means I wanted him dead???) Makenzie is refusing to give back my deposit, because she says she needs to have the carpets in my room professionally cleaned before a new roommate can move in. Why? Your guess is as good as mine. But I guess I'm willing to pay a couple hundred dollars to not deal with this anymore. Still, sucks. :/

#anime life #she only gave me like half of my deposit back :/ #anyway their real names were madison and travis lol. sometimes i think about what happened and i get sooooo upset all over again #even though it literally doesnt matter #i dont even live in the same state as them anymore #honestly i think she and travis just resented me because i had the largest bedroom (even though i paid more in rent) #and they didnt think i worked as hard as them #they both had full time jobs and i had a part time job. but i was also a full time student!!!!!!! #i woke up at 6 am and when i worked i got back at 10 pm!!!! #but when i didnt work i was back home before either of them woke up. #so i guess to them my school time just. didnt count??? #also they were mad i kept asking them to keep it down at night. even though they KNEW that i was going to need that when we all moved in #i dont know how many times i can tell a person that i have to be up at 6 so i can catch my bus to school #so i need them to be quiet after midnight #ALSO ALSO neither of them had ever had weed before we moved in together and then they both started smoking ALL THE TIME #and they were absolutely fucking intolerable after that #frankly if i didnt already think weed should be legal nationwide. this would have convinced me that no one should ever have it #sorry. it makes you too annoying. #long post

[mieczyhale]

i typed these tags on somebody’s post, due to it and then a ficlet someone had added on, but i decided it would be rude to reblog with my tags. BUT i still wanna share my stance on this Totally Important Topic so thank u, copy / paste

#i'm ngl #if you're playing in a campaign and your dm s/o is not the dm you're playing with - and your s/o has an ongoing campaign that they are not #only willing to add you to but wants to add you to but 1. you refuse 2. you wont say why - that's pretty shitty #especially if your dm s/o is someone who has been playing as long as eddie and is as passionate about it #i mean i guess at the very least he should've been honest. that part alone is its own kind of shit #but he should be in eddie's campaign #or both #you can be in more than one campaign at a time believe it or not #josh used to do that #it's not uncommon if you have more than one friend that's a dm #idk man #this kind of plot in st fics just bothers the shit out of me #the only real funny thing here is the ending but otherwise im just like 'mmm. gross.'

#this is about erica being steve's dm #and ynow what?? #only semi-related side bitch: #fics where steve does play in eddie's campaign and somehow ruins it - either one night or the whole thing - and then is smug about it #like those arent a lot of work to put together. like his boyfriend didnt put his whole heart soul and dick into it only for him to guess #something or spoil something or just be more obnoxious than any of the other teens combined. and the ones where eddie gets #genuinely upset about (any of the above) and the author doesnt allow him to be. like he immediately forgives steve or steve uses #sex as a way to stop eddie from being mad about it. like a thing i see in fics and absolutely hate is not letting eddie have feelings #especially negative ones when it comes to other people. unless its like.. annoyance. or if he IS allowed to feel something if he tries #to express it within a paragraph or two they have him all chill now or understanding or admitting that the other people was right in however #they upset him. now its not like he's the only character this happens to be jesus fucking christ #i may or may not have been holding onto a lot of negative feelings about fanfics for the last... while #doesnt help that im in an Easily Annoyed time myself #and ynow what else?? i've seen a lot of bitchass reactors lately - especially for that show that's also a book. book fans for that bitch are #some of the most obnoxious people on the goddamn planet i want to hammer their kneecaps and bust through the drywall in their houses #maison speaks