#etc etc etc u know the type

[stuckinapril]

friend wanted to see my tumblr, and when i told him i can’t show it to him bc it’s basically my personal diary he went “oh so I can’t see it but a bunch of strangers on tumblr can??” he literally does not get me. no one will get me like the people in my phone get me

#It’s just so different #even though it’s public it still feels secret and safe. i feel comfy sharing a lot more on here than I do in my actual day to day life lol #in my head I’m also just speaking to myself 90% of the time which helps #if a friend off tumblr saw my thoughts I’d feel so weird ab it #esp bc they might get the vagueposting about certain situations and tell mutual friends #no thank u. this is for me. I’m not about to start censoring my thoughts bc someone I know knows my tumblr #u guys literally saw me have LIVE BREAKDOWNS #meanwhile I’ll have the worst fucking day in history and tell no one about it. I’m already cripplingly private but way more so in real life #this is basically a low stress journaling outlet for me. it’s so important for me to maintain the separation #like this is actually my diary & has been so handy for letting out emotions / articulating thoughts / staying on track !! #& I’ve met so many kind people on here who actually get me. which is so hard to find irl bc I’m surrounded by pre-med gunners/overachievers #who are by standard not very good w emotion & can be competitive/judgmental. or at least it’s hard for me to be vulnerable in front of them #and I’m part of that crowd so I reserve my emotions only to a handful of very close friends #it’s nice to hop on here and express negative emotions!! or positive emotions!! just whatever I want and it’s low stress and people get me #I don’t have to worry about judgment or competitiveness etc etc #like everyone on here is so kind & nice & understanding. & just a breath of fresh air from the types I run w. it’s just nice to have this #so idk that’s why I think I’ll always be strict about keeping the worlds separate. it just works #p

[inkskinned]

it's just that sometimes you have to love a thing including the ways that it inconveniences you like i keep picking dog hair out of my clothes because he steals things from my laundry basket to lay on them while i'm gone and whenever i use my laptop i have to type with my arms in a parabola to make room for his head on my legs and yes it's kind of a far ride to my mom's house but she always remembers to have dairy-free options available just in case i stop at home and nick lives in another timezone so we have to plan our calls carefully to be sure he's available and i'm not in bed and i hate driving and looking for parking but it means i get to visit my friends and i hate doing dishes but i'll do a million if it means i get to throw a dinner party for everybody and i hate being cold but one time we stood outside in the snow for 5 hours waiting for a concert, bundled up and red-nosed

i always apologize about the ways i take up space even when they're medical like at a restaurant i usually have to take the moment to say i really am allergic, sorry, and feel like i am making everyone around me angry and i always apologize when i am too tired to be funny or when i actually really do need to take care of my human body because it feels like i'm making everything about-me and i always apologize for the ways that i become needy; how i get scared when we're high up (and no for real please get down it actually kind of stops being funny) or how i panic if i hear a loud noise i wasn't expecting or how it's been years but there are days when i'm still doing the same shit, still drowning

the trick about relaxing, i think. like the answer to why i couldn't trust the idea anyone actually likes me. was realizing that at some point i am going to be an inconvenience, which means that at some point i need to trust other people want me to take up space. and yes, some people have to take up a lot of space. but. i relish this little gratitude: making room for people and things in my life. i love picking the dog hairs out of my food - it means i get to have a dog. i love answering the phone at 3 in the morning - it means someone is on the other line, and i can help them weave through life. i love the little chores - it means i have something productive to do. so what if you take up space - it means this world gets to have you.

#writeblr #pos #this brought to you by having to type around my dog's head as he lays in my lap. he is snoozin . contented. also droolin on everythin #you know ur a pet owner when. etc. #he also likes to push until he is behind me on the couch. and then makes me sit like a prim princess w/my back straight so i don't fall off #mind u if i leave the couch he will follow to the floor #he just likes to be behind me ig???

[toxintouch]

TOUCHSTARVED SUMMONING CIRCLE WISH LIST:

. 🕯 .

. 🕯 🕯 .

. 🕯 MHIN 🕯 .

. 🕯 WITH A 🕯 .

. 🕯 HUSKY 🕯 .

. 🕯 VOICE 🕯 .

. 🕯 🕯 .

. 🕯 .

being a screaming abomination must be hard on your vocal chords.

#join my summoning circle if u like #I am offering Mhin a warm drink with honey. #Consider: Their voice gets all raspy when their monster has particularly active bc they have been *murderous bird screeches* all night #I do not know VAs so I do not have actual Big Opinions just someone gn sounding... #mhin touchstarved #Touchstarved Wishlist: Mhin #mini-mhin week interlude until their b-day? they would just love that. /sarcasm #tumblr formatting did not want me to have this circle #i was gonna describe this as vocal fry but i am thinking of the type of vocal fry that singers (kurt cobain etc) do &not...

[birdricks]

doing my anatomy study is fucking torturous bc every time i read some shit like “birds dont have a diaphragm” my brains like “hmmmm…… birdperson…..” and then i end up thinking abt him instead of studying

#it is rlly fun tho. thinking deeply abt alien (bird guy) biology all the time #ok typing this bc its fun and counts as revision. #(if i get anything wrong idgaf. this is from memory) #birds only have tiny kinda rigid lungs so they have a bunch of air sacs instead for air to flow into #and no diaphragm! so they use the intercostal muscles to breathe in and out #which r like the muscles around the ribs #but also means if u squeeze them around the middle they cant breathe #birds also have a kinda weird digestive system due to not having teeth etc #but of course bp .. does. but his diet is similar to that of seed eating birds #we dont see him eat i dont think. ? #its possible he has a mixed style of digestive system.. with a stomach like a human and gizzard like a bird #assuming he just swallows seeds whole without chewing lol #hmmm… id say its probably more likely he just has a proventriculus/gizzard combo and maybe like. a larger proventriculus than normal birds #hard to say. we dont rlly know enough abt his diet ig #altho i imagine it to be omnivorous #also smth fun is birds often swallow stones to help digest seeds. now if he chewed it probably wouldnt be necessary. but think abt it. silly #ok take this w a pinchhh of salt. but diet aside the teeth could be used simply for speech. #i vaguely remember learning abt that in language. #also he does Canonically have a cloaca ! wont go into that rn. but hmmm. much to think abt. #basiclaly bp pussy reallllll #kinda. #in the ways that matter ! #oooooh what else. #ooooh. yes. birds dont have vocal chords. they have a syrinx for vocalisation #but of coursee bp can talk. #butttt there are birds that can imitate human speech. so its possible bp just uses similar techniques for speech #but it also gives him a far greater control over his voice than most … making him perfect as the lead singer :] #oh and ummm. he veryyyy likely has hollow bones. so even tho hes huge hes deceptively light. TEE HEE #ok thats it. i need to actaully revise this shit now LOL #but ooohhgghhhg. i need him.

[mementomush]

i know will wood probably made “the main character” sound extra Quirky Spooky™️ on purpose so the chronically online would ignore the meaning and take it as a self-anthem which is super funny BUT i still feel myself shrivel up at my core anytime i see “will wood just like me fr?” or “i didnt know he was like that”

yes, will wood, known narcissist and lover of social media, made this song, meant it genuinely and put it right after a fucked up song all about being anti-social media corporation, ur so right bestie!!

#fungus rumbles #i know ww said he doesnt need defending online but im sorry i cant stand it omg #hes pro second chances and rehabilitation and doesnt ignore the ugliness of mental health and anti corporation and prison etc #hes so anti everything social media puts out there especially the every man for himself type attitude of self love that got popular #love this dude so much fr u can NOT get it twisted like that i hate it omg #will wood #wwattw #wwatt #will wood and the tapeworms #btw im not talking NPD im talking about online narcissism

[lokh]

watching shuro get redeemed in the eyes of the fandom like HA... vindication

#but also we were here first etc etc and would have been here even if it hadnt happened etc etc 😭😭😭😭😭 #anyways how does everyone feel about saying shuro instead of toshiro actually LMAO #i already knew his name was toshiro i check the wiki too often to not know but. kept saying shuro #becos its the name hes most identifiable by regardless of how Into dungeon meshi u are #<- race traitor 😭😭😭😭😭😭 #the fact that his name being toshiro was news to people kind of backs it up #if i started saying toshiro i know a lot of ppl would be like. who tf is that #anyways i was actually in the middle of a DIFFERENT post abt him when i had this thought LOL #typing this on my tablet while the other post is open on my phone

[sainz]

a closeted 20 year old that comes from a conservative rural family falling in love with a openly gay 18 year old on spanish prime tv

#a bit of background: #this is operacion triunfo a spanish tv show about sing! there are 16 contestants and they have to sing every monday a song #so they live in like a school academy where they have each day classes related to music (and they also rehearsal the song the have to #perform the mondays) #okay and like they have 0 connection with the rest of the world (they have phones but with no internet) so they know nothing about #what’s happening outside #SO there’s a youtube channel where they show each day what these contestants are doing (like big brother but related to music) #so um u get really attached to them cause u see them 24h!!! #so one of this contestants is juanjo (the one with the 🧢) and comes from a rural village and his fam is a bit conservative so he never #speaks about his sexuality - all the opposite he’s a bit ashamed of what he is bc he’s now used to act like himself #and then there is martin who is 18 and openly gay and like super open about all this topic super comfortable with himself etc #so this show has been going on for 3 weeks now okay? and in the first week u could see something was going on between these two #but since juanjo is so ashamed of this he rejected every type of touch that came for martin #martin got all ☹️ and he kinda told his friends there that he was having something with juanjo and he wasn’t receptive #(WE WERE SCREAMING IN TWITTER) #well since that moment it has been a fucking rollercoaster but juanjo is now a chiller and they cuddle and flirt in from of everyone #(they even have showers together cause rip they have 0 intimacy) #okay but today has been!!!! PUNTO DE INFLEXIÓN #juanjo has fallen in love so deeply with martin that oh god he needs to be by his side all the time omgomg #and yeah this vid happened tonight while their friends were singing and all twitter cried

[teknikolor-walters]

OH YEAH I HAD THIS BLOG IDEA THATS BEEN SPINNING IN MY BRAIN ALL DAY BUT IDK IF I HAVE THE SKILLS NECESSARY TO PULL IT OFF

#it would be like. an rp blog type thinf? sort of #you'd input commands and the character wpuld do it #like one of those choice video games #(stanley parable #slay the princess #etc) #like. es quest. but barrly any of u know what that is #it would also require lots of well made digital art #something i cannot do #and i barely have a plot idea

[absensia]

when talking about the challenges of writing and the journey of improving as a writer, something I notice in myself is how it can feel like there's a wall between myself and the character I'm writing, not because I don't know them well enough to write them, but rather, because I know them too well and so (especially in the context of roleplay where you are responding to a potentially novel and unexpected situation) there's just this knee-jerk knowledge of how Char is going to react/what she is going to say/what she is going to think, without me really having to think about it too much, and that feeling... that reflex of just knowing what Char is gonna do, can be hard to trust sometimes, tbh.

#think I've talked about this before but it's just interesting... how after so many years of research and development #writing Char has just become so natural that it borders on feeling thoughtless when it comes to writing her reactions/dialogue #there's a weird persistent feeling of “I should be putting more thought into this” but... no #each time I read back whatever I write - it's like “yeah no that tracks that's Char that's right” #the feeling of disconnect comes when Char surprises even /me/ in the moment of writing... but u know what THAT'S PART OF THE FUN #like sometimes she really does surprise by how ... for ex. how passive she can be or how egregiously she is willing to push ppl etc etc #me: you really want to say that / char: did I stutter? no. get to typing go go #sighs dreamily anyways she's my darling she's my gremlin i made her w my brain and hands and now i sometimes can't believe her :')

[nerice]

they did this for me tm <3

#WE LOVE AN EVIL APHRODISIAC PLOTLINE #no im not keeping up with this show i dont have the patience for detective talk but i heard there was Content :)! #undead murder farce #i should skim thru the other eps one of these days just to see if there were any other cute moments #alas health cataclysm continues so im Not Really Here but u know i cant resist the siren call of these exact chara type moments <33 #I Have Fucked Gods Much Stronger Than You etc etc i will be thinking abt this now thanks

[coffeeandcalligraphy]

putting this out there but if you've been following me & you want me to follow you back/read your writing/interact with your posts etc, please feel free to tell me!!!!! like literally @ me! I know this might seem very *bold* and I myself as an anxious person would be like :) oh :) absolutely not :) but SERIOUSLY I want to read your stuff, etc!

SIMILARLY: if you DO interact with my stuff & ever feel anxious that you're annoying me & should stop, YOU'RE NOT!!! (I am chronically wondering if I'm soooo annoying & if you're like that too, just know you're not!!!! I love seeing people having fun on my posts/tags/asks/etc! <3).

I love to see people excited about writing whether it's mine or yours! okay PSA over!

#nobody prompted this btw!!! i've just been meaning to say this for weeks and am now typing out the post at 3AM LOL #I know what it's like to be like 'ohhh should I interact or will this person think I'm weird' :) #not weird!! ur fine!!! #same thing goes for tagging me in things like games/posts etc! #and the reverse if u want to be tagged in games etc lmk!!!

[ventiswampwater]

I should be given an award every single time I successfully resist the urge to tag other ppl's gifsets w/the nastiest most vile horny bullshit. I should be an olympic gold medalist @ this point

#I need a trophy or a blue ribbon or smthn jdsfhjfdhsj #sidenote. I truly don't care & also FULLY endorse u all leaving the most bonkers tags on my gifs #go crazy go stupid u know!! I love that shit #but personally. knowing that op will perceive my madness. occasionally gives me pause. occasionally makes my eye twitch u know #god................... #this post is about adam saw 2004 and how whenever I see a gifset of him I have 2 YANK my fingers off the keyboard VIOLENTLY #lest I type anything even vaguely related to: god I need to peg him I need to peg him I NEED TO PEG HIM NOW #the fact that I am not topping him @ all times!!!!! biphobia is alive n well!!!!!!! #I need him whimpering & whining in my bedchambers!!!!!! humina humina awoooooooga!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! etc. #<-u did not need 2 know that. but now u do #posting this on main bc I'm on crack idk #sam speaks

[dennisboobs]

#ada speaks #im cooking #im scheming #i had to put my full fucking name in for this #hi meg. please allow me to send in homosexual fanart xoxo your besties on tumblr #i dont want to say anything yet but if youre reading my tags hi #i want to compile a zine for the guys (glenn) filled with like. appreciation from tumblr bc i know they dont get to see this kind of thing #like im talking. sunny is a love story type meta. #and vicky art. ofc. #my only thing is like. getting it to them (him) #recruiting someone to hand deliver it at a m&g or something is a possibility too but that doesnt give us much time #anyway yeah im just. i want to compile a bunch of loveposting that goes a little deeper than ppl quoting the show at them #within reason. im sure they cant read certain types of meta for the same reasons they cant read fanfiction or scripts or whatever #but just having them sprinkled in with a bunch of fanart is. u kno. i think it would be nice #hi boys! we are deranged! #i just want time to get permission from people for their posts and allow artists time to finish pieces etc

[truegoist]

I want shido to turn out to be rllly insecure and shit

#HEAR ME OUT FOR A SECOND OKAY #Ik a lot of guys that r like him #On surface at least #They’re loud and constantly in trouble and they get into a lot of fights #Nd u see them and go “yeah he just doesn’t give a fuck” #But when u get to know them it turns out they do give a lot of fucks actually #they actually care sm and it’s fucking stupid how hard they try to look like they do not #and they’ve almost always came to the conclusion that only way to stop thinking so lowly abt themselves is to just #Not think at all #But this behavior leads to everyone degrading them as a joke bc it’s funny and they’re a silly guy who doesn’t care so it’s ok right??? #so they also start to make self depreciating jokes to satisfy their desperate need to fit in #which makes them think more and more which makes them repeat the cycle again and and and #It’s depressing how many guys r like this but whatever anyways #DO YOU GET WHAT I MEAN #SHIDOU FITS PERFECTLY INTO THAT TROPE #HE HAS A DEPRESSING STORY IK IT #anyways on a second note I love befriending that type of guys bc they’re actually rlly cute #+ they almost always have this one hobby they talk to no one abt (bc it’s too girly or too weird etc) that they’re rlly rlly excited abt #blue lock