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eeunoia · 2 years

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ENHYPEN Mini Series

E N H Y P E N as Rugby Players

pairing: lee heeseung x reader

summary: being paired with the ace of the school’s rugby team and the bad boy Lee Heeseung brought so much more other than headache.

word count: 8k

warning: not proof read

note📎: surprise! please vote enhypen on MAMA. let me know what you think, my asks are open. I hope you guys liked it! it really means a lot to me whenever you let me know what you think about them, re-blogs and comments are well appreciated. btw, i love you guys and thank you for reading my works. have a nice day/night! 🤍

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“What’s with the crowd? What happened?” you asked, brows furrowed curiously to why a lot of students were over there. It was odd and you can even hear some gasps and them talking about something.

Your friend glanced at you for a while before a smirk formed her lips, “Lee Heeseung happened.” she answered that made your face grow uninterested. Why are you not even surprised to hear his name whenever there’s a commotion?

You let out a small scoff before turning your back to focus at what you’re about to do. You opened your locker and started getting your text-books that you’ll be needing. A lot of students were still surrounding the scene but this time, you don’t give a care anymore. It is safe to say that you are used to these things already.

“Can you believe it? He’s fighting someone again. How can he even still be in the team?” your friend leaned over the locker beside yours as she asked that, eyes darted at the far left where the crowd is.

You sighed and shrugged your shoulders off, “He’s very rich, didn’t you know that? And besides, what will happen to the team if he’s not there?” you said with tone full of sarcasm.

Your friend nodded her head, “Ah right. The ace...” she said and you glanced back at the crowd after you shut your locker closed. This time, some of the students were paved letting you have a small peek of what’s happening right there.

In the middle, standing proud and tall, having his hair a bit disheveled, smirk plastered over his handsome face, Lee Heeseung was holding an already beaten up guy over his collar. You sighed and can’t believe you’ve been seeing this again. You don’t actually understand why he’s always looking for trouble but at this point, you just got used to it. He’s not Heeseung if he’s not seeking for trouble.

“Let’s go.” you muttered lowly and started walking away without even looking back at the scene.

Your class started when your teacher got inside. It isn’t really your favorite subject but you’re also not planning to slack off. As you rest your chin over at the back of your hand after resting your elbow at your desk, someone entered the room and you just rolled your eyes when you saw him entering. He got a blank face and went straight at a vacant chair. You didn’t bother to follow him with your eyes but instead just focus to what your teacher was saying.

You’ve been in class with Heeseung for three years now and you can say you are pretty much not fond of his attitude. He’s popular yes, being one of the star players of the school’s pride rugby team and having a handsome face it was like a given fact that he’ll surely be popular. But other than that, he’s known for being a complete trouble maker. He cut class, he often got into fights and a lot of usual bad-boy deeds. You don’t really care as long as you’re not involve with him in any way. If the other girls wants to be close to him, you’re gonna pass with that. Lee Heeseung only means trouble and that’s the least thing you would want in your life.

“Okay class. We’ll be having a group research. You will be paired by another person and you are to think about a topic you wanted your research to be about.” you heard your teacher said while you write something over your notebook. She then started saying the names of the groupings that she formed herself.

You don’t mind who will you be partnered with. As long as they’re gonna do their part-- “Heeseung and y/n.” your hand stopped from writing notes after you just heard what she said.

You snapped your head towards your teacher and she’s not looking at you but instead at the paper she was holding, continuing on announcing the other pairs. You cannot believe what you just heard and was still in shock when your eyes unconsciously darted over to the boy sitting at the left corner. Unexpectedly, he was already looking at you.

He tilted his head over to the side as he raised a brow at you. His elbow was resting at his table while his hand was playing with his lips. You pursed your lips and quickly glanced away. You can’t believe you just got paired with him. Out of all the students in your class, what are the odds that you end up with him?

“Don’t even start.” you hissed at your friend when you saw her looking at you with a teasing smile. She let out a small chuckle before she bit her lower lip, suppressing a stifle laugh.

“Can you believe it? You’re paired with Lee Heeseung.” she said, tone a bit excited. You turn your head at her with a frowning face.

“Why do you look so excited?” you asked pissed and she just shrugged her shoulders off. You rolled your eyes and was startled when somebody sat down at the vacant chair beside you. The sound of the chair being dragged and when someone sit on it was a bit too loud that it caught some of your classmate’s attention.

“Hello, y/n.” it was Heeseung. You watch as his eyes roam around the room before it settles on you. His eyes were piercing and dark, like as if he knew how much power it holds.

Lee Heeseung is gorgeous if you’ll be asked. There is no way you can say something insulting about his physical appearance. His eyes are big, his nose is pointed, lips are naturally red and kissable. He’s tall and well fit too. There’s no flaws and if there is, it naturally turned into a pretty flaw. It was almost perfect not until you come to know his bad boy image.

You stared at him, “What?” you asked sarcastically. You saw how he squinted his eyes a bit and even tilted his head. You two were just staring at each other’s eyes like as if whoever looks away, loses.

He was about to talk when someone called out for his attention.

“Heeseung hyung,” you two both snapped your heads towards the entrance of the room only to see the rugby team’s captain. He’s lower classmen, Yang Jungwon.

“We have practice now, you’re excused.” he said, the younger one glanced at you for a while before he looked back to his hyung.

“Alright. I’ll follow you, Won. Thanks.” he said and he soon left the room.

Heeseung turned his head at your direction and after rudely running his eyes from your heat to toe, he looked you in your eyes once again. n “I’ll meet you later in the locker’s area. Dismissal, after my practice.” he ordered like a boss and without even glancing back at you, he stormed out of the room.

You let out a scoff couldn’t believe at how he just bossed you around like you’re one of those students who he bullies all the time. You tried shrugging it off and tried hard to focus yourself at the class instead. You’re already stressed by the fact that you are grouped with him, you don’t want that to ruin your mood for the whole long day.

“Aren’t you worried?” your friend asks while both of you walked through the hallway, your last class just finished and now you’re on your way to your locker.

You furrowed your brows a bit at her while holding your books over your chest, “About what?” you asked confused.

“That you’re paired with the Lee Heeseung.” she said. Your hand halted when you were about to open your locker. With a slow pace, you opened it and eyes darted mindlessly at your things inside.

“Besides being worried that I’ll be having a hard time doing the whole project with him is there anything else I should be worried about?” you said and put inside he text-books you don’t need to bring home. She pursed his lips and watch you with her worried eyes.

“His fan girls will go crazy.”

You let out a scoff, “Then they should go and do the project with him. I don’t care about who I’m paired with, (friend’s name), as long as I’ll get a good outcome.” and you closed your locker before facing her.

An amused smile appeared over her face. As expected from you, you really don’t care if he’s popular or what. Her eyes soon darted at the person behind you so you turned around to check who it was. With a widened eyes, you’re suddenly face to face with Heeseung’s broad chest.

“Let’s talk.” he muttered in a low tone. You slowly trailed your eyes from his chest up to his eyes who’s staring down at you. His eyes were serious as a couple of damp hair strands were covering it a bit. He smelled a mixture of men’s perfume and shower gel that somehow addicting.

“I’ll leave you two. See you tomorrow, y/n.” your friend said and you didn’t had the chance to look at her because you’re busy having a staring contest with him. You don’t know what’s with his eyes, or maybe with the way he looks at you, but you just can’t find yourself looking away.

“O-Okay, let’s discuss about the project.” you were the one who break the eye contact, when you suddenly realized that the students passing by the two of you were giving you weird stares.

Heeseung scoffed and leaned over the lockers as he crossed his arms. “Discuss? You’ll do it yourself.” he mumbled that made you furrowed your brows.

You stared at him for a while, trying to figure out if he’s joking or if he’s serious. He tilted his head a little returning your gaze and chewed over his gum. You scoffed, cannot believe what he just said. You rolled your eyes then seriously give him the look, “It’s called a group work for a reason.” you started.

He click his tongue, “So?”

You heaved a sigh, calming yourself and fighting the strong urge of smacking his head out of his neck. He’s seriously pissing you off. Is this how he gets through every group project? Just letting the other people do all the work while he live his life? Huh, well not today, Lee Heeseung.

You flashed a sarcastic smile at him, “So, you have to do your part or else I won’t include your name and you’ll get a zero, Mr. Lee Heeseung.” you said with all sarcasm.

Heeseung’s chewing went slow as he was caught off guard at how you sounded so sarcastic at him. He had never talked to anyone from their university with this way of tone towards him. It was somewhat... new.

“You can’t do that.” he shrugged his shoulders off.

“Yes, I can.”

“I have practice.” he tried again.

“Oh come on, you have time to party and all that stuff. I’m sure you can squish a few hours to do your part of the project, am I right, Mr. Ace?” you once again flashed a pretty smile at him. It was indeed pretty, you are indeed very beautiful but Heeseung was a bit annoyed at how you just go sarcastic at him.

He clenched his jaw, “So if you want a good grade in order to wear your beloved rugby uniform and to play in that field, you have to work with me.” you said, tone teasing.

You advanced and you gently fixed his shirt before smiling again at him, “Alright? Alright. See you around.” you said before turning your heels and leaving him dumbfounded.

Did he just let you manipulate him in doing a school project? Heeseung scoffed after a couple of minutes of spacing out before he huffed, “Fuck...” he mumbled and he even hit the locker beside him then decided to leave.

“I knew it!” your eyes snapped over to your friend when she exclaimed that the moment she set foot inside your classroom. She have this worried expression as her hold over her books tightened, lips puckering in a pouty way.

You gave her a confused looks before eyeing what you’re writing before she interrupted, “What’s wrong with you, weirdo?” you asked and just let her walk closer and sat down at her usual spot.

“He didn’t agree to do his part, did he? Ah! My poor y/n! You have to do the whole research all by yourself.” she exaggeratedly said and even went to give you a tap over your back.

You rolled your eyes then put down your pen before glaring towards her direction. “Can you stop overreacting? You’re distracting me. I’m dividing our parts.” you mumbled that made her worried confusion turn into a surprised one.

“Eh???!” she shouted that made some of your classmates turn their attention over your way. You felt embarrassed because of it so you hit her arm lightly.

“Yah! Can you cut that out?!” you said sounding really shy because of the attention you two just gained. She pursed her lips, cheeks blushing now as she raised her hand to cover her mouth.

“Did I just heard that right? You are dividing your parts meaning he agreed?” this time she lowered down her voice. You rolled your eyes at her then sighed before you started writing down again.

“Yeah.” you shortly replied.

Your friend have her mouth gapped for a while as she cannot believe what she just found out. She knew you’re a different breed, as to why you don’t care even if you’re paired with a popular kid, but she doesn’t expect you to have this kind of will power. How did you even manage to make Lee Heeseung agree on participating with the project? She can’t understand.

“Where is he then?” she asked curiously as she roamed her eyes around. He isn’t around and the teacher already arrived. You shrugged your shoulders off.

“ I don’t know. Cutting class I guess?”

“Then how is he suppose to help you?”

You glanced at her then you pursed your lips before saying, “I’ll just see him later after their practice then give him this. We still need to decide what’s our topic for this research.” you said, you sounded confident and seems like you aren’t that stressed so she assumed you got it all handled.

The whole day go on like normal. You focused yourself with your classes and Heeseung pops in some of them but he didn’t even manage to try to talk to you. He’s just there, you bet he’s not even listening. You even saw him sleeping at one of the classes and like always, the teachers don’t even try to wake him up. That’s maybe why he have a rotten personality because the people around him always tolerates that kind of behavior. He’s like a brat, a kid, and very immature. Whatever he wants, he will get it no matter what.

“Bye, y/n! See you tomorrow.” your friend waved while she started walking towards the opposite direction.

You smiled and waved before you decided to go in the school field where you will find him. You just finished listing some of the possible topics you two can cover for the research and also the parts he may have to do. While walking your way, you can see some students watching their practice game.

As you eye the middle of the field, all you can see was them all hovered with each other as their team captain can be heard ordering some positions and moves that you don’t even know. Mostly, all you can see are their backs and the numbers plastered on it. You can’t even have a good look of their faces for you to find which one is Heeseung. You don’t know his jersey number so you’re totally lost.

When you heard their coach shouted that the training’s over, you sighed out of relief and waited patiently for them to scatter away from the field. As they made their way over their shower room, you can see him walking side by side with one of his friends and also teammate, Jay. They were seriously discussing about something.

“Heeseung.” you called out. You’re pretty sure he’s the only Heeseung in their team but a lot of them snapped their heads at your direction. Maybe the fact that a female’s voice calling out his name made such a big deal.

Heeseung was brushing his hair as he furrowed his brows at the sight of you. He said something to Jay first before he jogged towards you. “What?”

“I need to give you this--” you were cut off when he talked again.

“Hold on. I will just take a quick shower so we can talk properly.” he said.

You squinted your eyes at him with a bit of suspicion. “You’re not planning to escape from me, are you?”

He rolled his eyes, “I’m soaked in sweat and dirt, y/n. I don’t want you being uncomfortable because of it.” he said that caught you off guard a bit.

“Sit down for a while. I’ll be quick.” he said and turned around to go walk towards their shower area.

He did took a quick shower and even before you know it, he’s walking out having his sports bag at one of his shoulder, his hair a bit damp. “What is it again?” he sounded impatient and his tone sounded a bit irritated.

You handed him the folder you prepared. “Here are some of the possible topics that we can cover for the research. I don’t want to decide on my own and so I will let you see it first then we can choose together.” you said, eyes fixed at the files inside as yo tell him what it is.

Without you knowing, his eyes aren’t over the files but over you. He doesn’t understand as well but when he saw you at the bleachers waiting for him, something inside him went crazy. Like he want to see it more often.

“And these are the parts you need to do once we have decided our topic.” you said and your eyes then darted over him. You two met eyes since he was already looking at you. He wasn’t taken aback and didn’t even feel ashamed that he was caught staring. Instead, you’re the one who got flushed.

“Are you even l-listening?” you asked, stuttering because of the way he was looking at you.

“Yeah. These are the possible topics and these are what I will do, right?” he said giving a short summary of what you just explained him. You gulped and nodded your head then quickly glanced away.

You cleared your throat trying to get rid of the sudden lump between it then calmed yourself down. Your heart was suddenly hammering down, you don’t even know why. It couldn’t be the stares right? Because you two had already a staring contest the other day.

“Good. Uhh,” your eyes teared away from his and unconsciously eyed the empty field. “so I’ll see you tomorrow during the library period.” you said and was about to go already but was stopped when his big hands get a grip of your wrist.

“What if I can’t do some of the parts? I mean, what if I have a hard time doing it?” he asked. Heeseung doesn’t know if he’s really curious about it. He even knew himself that he doesn’t give a single fuck about the project, but he just really want to delay you from going away.

“Then I’ll help you. I already told you, it’s called a group work for a reason. If you find it hard, you just tell me and i’ll help you. Okay?” you said and tilted your head at the side waiting for his answer.

Heeseung pursed his lips and licked his lower lip before nodding in a cool way without a word. You sighed and nodded your head too then finally leave to go home.

“Who was that?” Heeseung got startled when someone suddenly talked beside him. He looked over his friend who already have a smirking face as he wait for his answer.

He rolled his eyes, “None of your business.” he shuts him off too quickly.

He heard a teasing laugh as the younger one tried to catch up with him right away, “Ey, come on, hyung.” Ni-ki even wrapped his arm over his hyung waiting patiently.

He eyed him, “Just my partner in a group project.” he said then quickly glanced away. Ni-ki nodded his head continuously but still a teasing smile was present over his face.

“Hmm, okay.” he said. He wanted so bad to believe that its true. That you are really just his partner for a project but he’s pretty sure this is the very first time he saw his hyung hurry himself up for someone especially a girl.

“Tsk. Leave me alone, Ni-ki. Go annoy Jay instead.” he said and walked away from his younger friend, Ni-ki chuckled when he saw how his ears were all red.

“How does it feel to be able to work on a project with the Lee Heeseung?” he was wearing his cocky smile as he settle his things at the space beside you. After rolling your eyes and clicking your tongue, you turned towards the newly arrived male, “How does it feel to be all so cocky? Hurry up. I don’t have all the time in the world.” you hissed at him.

A smirk appeared over his lips at how you just shut him off that way. He really fins it interesting, the way you’re all bossy in front of him. He’s really enjoying this, not doing the project but being around you.

“Woah, relax tiger.” he teased before sitting down. You huffed a sigh then you started discussing to him the topics that you choose from. You made sure he can understand and that he knows what you two needs to undergo in each topic for him to choose properly.

Thankfully, he was surprisingly participating better than you expected him to. You had chose a topic and now working on some of the parts you are assigned to. He was working beside you, brows furrowed seriously. You caught yourself staring at him because he looked so good. He’s wearing his uniform and his hair was a bit messy but still, he looked so handsome. You can understand a little why girls go crazy of him.

“Take a picture, baby. It’ll last longer.” a smirk slowly spread across his face when he said that and you quickly blushed because he knew you are staring.

You gulped and blink a couple of times trying to compose yourself. “I-I’m checking if what you’re doing is right.” you tried reasoning out covering up how you just admired his visuals.

He scoffed as he gave you sarcastic nods then focused at what he was doing again. “Sure. Whatever you say.” he muttered that made you flushed even more.

You turned your attention back to what you were doing and tried hard to focus on it instead on the person beside you. That didn’t last long since you felt some light taps that interrupted you, Heeseung was staring at you with his big eyes, face looking confused.

“Hmm?” you asked, eyes looking straight him.

“I can’t understand this part.” he said and it almost he’s a child. It was so cute but of course you tried keeping it to yourself. You leaned closer to his paper so you can see what he’s referring to.

You nodded then eventually explained it to him as he listens carefully, nodding his head from time to time and his lips forming an ‘o’ as he finally understands it.

“Got it?” you asked. He turned his head over at you and smirked a little before he gently messed your hair that caught you off guard.

“Yeah, thanks.” his reply was short but for some reason, it made your heart thump faster. What’s with his sweet tone? Or you just misheard it? You gulped and tried to shake that thought off of your mind.

This time it was harder to focus yourself but you did. The silence between Heeseung and you was not the kind where you feel uncomfortable and awkward, somehow the sound of pens scratching the papers, his humming and his heavy sighs became comforting. Like its letting you know that you aren’t alone.

“Tomorrow, you have practice right? We can just do the project the day after tomorrow.” you said as you fix your things because you two are going home now.

Heeseung eyed you and nodded his head while watching you do that. He did nod but didn’t fully listen because his mind was in a mess right now. He’s battling how he can ask you if he can drive you home. He was a bit worried that you’ll find it weird but he also can’t stop himself from wanting to do it. He doesn’t know what got into him ever since the day he encountered with you, it’s like their’s a force that pulling him close to you.

Maybe its the fact that despite him being popular, being one of the star players of your well known rugby team, you treated him differently. You act like as if he isn’t the Lee Heeseung. You completely invaded his mind and he doesn’t know if he’s too happy about it.

“Y/n.” he called you out once you two were out of the library. There are still some students around but not that many since maybe a lot headed home already.

You turned your head towards him, both eyebrows raised in curiousity of what he’s gonna say. Heeseung gulped, trying to shake off whatever that is that making him feel nervous. He had never felt this way before, even in his games, he was always confident. Why does he act like this towards you?

“I’ll drive you home.” he let out. You furrowed your brows at him before you feel something inside your stomach went crazy. The butterflies! Why are they like this?

“N-Nah, it’s okay. I can manage.” you politely declined because you don’t want to bother him.

He clenched his jaw before he started approaching you, “I didn’t ask permission, I said I will drive you home.” he said, acting like a boss once again so a frown was formed over your face but it was too late for him to see since he walk pass by you grabbing your books from as he did.

“Hey!” you said but he was already walking towards where the parking lot is. You were left with no choice but to go after him because he got your books.

You arrived and saw his familiar fancy car. You heard him clicked the car and handed you back your books before eyeing you seriously.

“Passenger seat.” he mumbled before waiting for you to go do as he say. After giving him an eyeroll, you walked close to his shotgun sit and get inside.

You want to internally kick yourself for thinking he will open the car door for you. He’s Lee Heeseung for pete’s sake. He’s not that type of a guy. He’s the bad boy of the rugby team, you don’t fancy him and his troubles so why the heck is your heart racing like some psycho just chased you down?

When he entered his car, you heaved a sigh, calming yourself down. But it seems like he’s really trying you today because not long after finally calming your heart a bit, he leaned closer to you, letting you get a smell of his perfume, nose slightly touched his cheeks. Your eyes grew wide-eyed when you see how close he is to you. You quickly stiffened at the situation.

“Seatbelts, beautiful.” he mumbled softly, face still close to you.

You pursed your lips making sure they aren’t gonna touch his cheeks. You don’t know if he’s doing this on purpose but you’re not liking it on one bit. He’s making your heart race continuously and that’s not funny.

He pulled away once he got satisfied that you are safe beside him, licking his lower lip and heaving out a sigh because he didn’t expect that he will be that close to you. The feeling of your nose grazing over his cheeks makes him go crazy.

The drive was pretty much silent because the two of you were still dazed by the sudden closeness from before. When you arrived at where your apartment is, you turned over him and gave him a small smile.

“T-Thank you so much. Drive safely.” you said and waved cutely.

Heeseung nodded his head and watch at how you struggle taking off your seatbelt because your hands were a bit shakey. He smiled a little then helped you right away, making your hands touched for a good three seconds. You were quick enough to snap yourself back to your senses then waved once again before you went out.

You bit your lower lip feeling a bit embarrassed at what just happened. You’re pretty sure that you looked a bit dumb a while ago. You have no idea why you’re acting like this.

Heeseung smiled as he watch you get inside your apartment building. “Cute.” he mumbled before driving off.

The following days was fine, Heeseung wasn’t that bad. He is funny sometimes, fun to talk to, cocky and still makes your heart race often. All in all, you may say its not so bad. Or so you thought.

“What the fuck happened to you?” was the first words that came out from your mouth after you opened your apartment door for him.

Since most of the days they already have practice because their games are near, you two decided that you can do your project here in your apartment in days that he needs to stay late at practice. This day is one of them.

You’re surprised to see him bruised up in front of your door. He rolled his eyes, not in the mood. You let him in as always, your eyes following him. When he sat down, he let out a grunt after feeling some parts of his body aching.

You clicked your tongue, brows furrowed hardly. You are pissed that he arrived like this but you can’t help but to feel worried as well.

“Did you seriously got into fight? I thought you’re in practice.” you started and started looking for your first-aid kit.

You saw how his face was serious. He seems like he isn’t really in the mood to talk about it. You sighed and walked close to him after finally finding the kit. His eyes moved to you and his heart raced at the sight of you holding that.

“I will treat your bruise then you can go home. We can just do the project tomorrow.” you said using a cold tone. You aren’t mad, you’re just worried for him. For some reasons, even if you deny it, he had grew close to you and surprisingly, you opened up to him as well.

Heeseung pursed his lips and glanced away, “I can’t go home. I had an argument with my Father.” he said that left your hand in mid-air.

“Did he do this to you?” you asked, eyes widened.

Silence. He did? His own father hurt him. Your mouth gapped a bit, heart aching for him. You want to ask what happened but you know he doesn’t want to talk about it so instead, you carefully leaned closer to him. You stretched your arms pulling him into a hug that he’s been needing for a very long time. Heeseung was dumbfounded as he felt a warmth he’s been wanting ever since.

Slowly, his arms slid over your waist as he bury his face at your chest fighting the urge of crying. Your hand slowly caress his hair, heart aching at how vulnerable he is right now.

“H-He was hurting Mom again... I hate it. I don’t want it. I-If the only reason why my Mom kept it all in is because of me, I hope she just leave him.” he said, tone full of anger.

You pursed your lips and eyes shutting a bit feeling so bad for him. You tried calming him and caress his back. You let him stay for the night since he doesn’t want to go home and you also don’t want him driving like this towards a friend’s house.

You watch how his face looked so peaceful while sleeping. He was always smirking cockily whenever you see him, he always looked so arrogant that you will really never thought he’s going through something this serious. You felt yourself about to cry because you feel bad that you had judge him too quickly. After brushing away some hair from his handsome face, you covered him with a blanket then went inside your room to sleep as well.

After that day, you thought Heeseung will act differently. Like as if colder since you had seen him like that but no, it was the opposite. Suddenly, he was all attached to you.

“What are you doing?” you asked, brows fully furrowed as you watch him place things beside your chair. He was excused moments ago because of practice but he’s still here doing weird stuff.

He glanced at you for a while before he roamed his eyes at the whole room. His gaze changes whenever his eyes tear off from yours, his arrogant eyes were back whenever he looks at different people.

“So no one will sit beside you.” he said loud enough for some of your classmates to hear. You blushed as your friend beside you scoffed, still couldn’t believe how Heeseung act around you.

You frowned and hit him by his arm, “Are you crazy? Go to your practice now and stop embarrassing me.” you hissed at him. He smirked and nodded before leaning to give you a kiss at your forehead that left you all flushed.

“Alright, baby. See you later.” and with that, he did left leaving some glares over the people inside the room who’s watching.

You heaved a sigh, calming yourself at what he just did. “You two looked so cute.”

You rolled your eyes, cheeks still all blushing because of it. “Shut up.” you said and she just let out a chuckle.

Heeseung is crazy. He’s been all clingy to you and started acting like this towards you. It was sweet for the other people, you’re not gonna lie, he is indeed sweet and it is making you feel butterflies and makes you blush but you’re worried. You are worried that he isn’t that serious with you. Afterall, he’s Lee Heeseung of the rugby team, the ace and the notorious bad boy.

On the other hand, Lee Heeseung is all serious with his feelings for you. When he realized what he feel towards you are very serious, he started showing it towards you shamelessly, treating you differently.

“You look excited.” Jay pointed out to the older one. He just smirked and position himself again because their captain gave another order.

“I am excited.”

Jay scoffed, he knew pretty well what’s going on. It is a bit news around the whole campus that the bad boy is slowly being tamed by someone who goes by the name, y/n. He doesn’t want to believe it, actually, their group of friends don’t want to believe it at first, but after seeing how he’s too soft around you and how he treats you, they realized their ace is indeed in love.

Lovey dovey Heeseung is fine and cute but possessive and jealous Heeseung sure is a different thing to deal with. He’s temper is just not in its best condition whenever he see someone gets your attention away from him.

“Why are you picking a fight with him, huh? What are you, a child?” you hissed at him while he’s wearing a sulky face while sitting at one of the bleachers. You are at the field, they don’t have a practice but after you knew what he did to one of your classmates, you rush to go here knowing so well where you’ll find him.

“He was seriously flirting with you.” he mumbled angrily, brows furrowed hardly, lips all pouty because he is very upset too.

You sighed heavily, “Heeseung, he’s my group mate for a project so its just normal for him to talk to--”

“What project? Aren’t we group with each other?” he said, eyes now looking at you.

You pursed your lips before flicking his forehead once. You manage to do that since he’s sitting down and you’re standing in front of him. He groaned massaging the part where you hit him.

“Its in the subject that you are not in. You have to seriously stop picking fights all the time.” you said.

He didn’t surrender too easily though, he kept his sulky face. Okay, it is wrong for him to just randomly pick a fight but you also don’t understand that he is upset and that he’s freaking jealous. He’s slowly getting really busy since the season is nearing and that means he gets less time to spend with you. He’s just worried that someone will get too close to you, he doesn’t even know if you feel the same way with him and he don’t want to rush you at all.

You let out a sigh as you look at his sulky face. “Fine. I’ll take, (friend’s name) with me whenever we do our group project.” you said.

He snapped his head at your direction right away, “Really?” he asked, tone sounding so cute.

You pursed your lips then nodded it for him. Soon a smile appeared across his face before he stood up, towering you. He placed a kiss at your forehead then pull you in for a hug.

“I will surely treat (friend’s name) into somewhere good because she looks after you while I’m busy.”

You rolled your eyes but a small smile appeared your face, “Look after? What am I, a baby?”

He chuckled, “Yeah... my baby.”

He was often with you whenever he doesn’t have practice. During classes, he will sit beside you all the time. Teachers were even surprised that he don’t skipped class that often too.

“I’m sleepy.” he yawned, one time. You are at the class, waiting for the teacher to arrive. You smiled a little watching as the corner of his eyes watered because of the yawn.

You raised your hand fixing his hair, “Sleep first then I’ll wake you when the teacher arrived.” you mumbled softly and he stared at your eyes first before leaning close kissing your cheeks all of the sudden.

Your mouth gapped as he smirked at your face. “Why did you--”

“Why are you so pretty, baby? How come you are still single before I found you? What are the guys around you doing? Are they blind or just really stupid?” he mumbled continuously.

You were already blushing so hard when you glanced away, “I thought you’re s-sleepy? Just sleep.” you said and even gently shoved his head to lean over the table.

You heard him chuckling a little, “Your blushing.”

“Shut up!” you shut him off and he just chuckle before leaning already at the table.

You won’t deny it, that the ace player were slowly creeping over not just your heart but also over your whole system. You’re starting to look for him all the time and he’s always inside your mind. You are not dumb, you are aware that you are falling for him. A part of you were relaxed since base on how he treats you, he seems like he feels the same. But at the same time, you are still very worried. That Heeseung was just overwhelmed and just amused with everything.

You walked over the hallway to meet one of your club member because she said she will give you the things you need to do for your club. It was dismissal already and you know that Heeseung was at the practice. The team are really getting very busy.

“Y/n, you’re assigned for these stuff.” she started and giving you a list. You pursed your lips when you saw that it was too many. Yeah, you sure you can do it but still, it was too much of work.

You are known for being responsible at school and because of that, the people around you always takes advantage of that.

“And also you should--”

“She should what?” both of your head snapped over to the person behind you.

There he was, Lee Heeseung, hair still a bit damp and he’s now wearing his fresh plain white t-shirt. His familiar scent invaded your nose that made your heart skipped a bit, he was towering you while he rest one of his hands at locker beside your head.

The girl in front of you blushed at the sight of Lee Heeseung. Her lips were parted in surprise and instantly got intimidated when she saw how he eyed her.

“Don’t you think its too much for one person?” he asked, brows furrowed hardly as he look over your shoulder to see the paper you were holding.

You squinted your eyes and moved it away from his view so he wouldn’t read further more. He pouted at you, before shooting cold stares at the girl in front of you again.

“U-Uh..” she said, obviously scared. She eyed you.

“We can lessen your work--”

“Lessen? Do it for her instead--” he said arrogantly but was cut off when you hit him by the head.

He frowned cutely before pouting and massaging the part that you hit. You turned your head towards the girl then smiled at her. She looked surprised at what you just did to the great Lee Heeseung.

“Thanks, I will surely take care of this. Bye!” you said and held unto Heeseung’s arms before started to pull this big giant away from there.

“Seriously why are here? I thought you’re at practice?” you asked and you both stopped in front of your own locker so you can put your books inside.

He pouted then rolled his eyes before leaning at the locker beside yours as he watch you. “I’m here because you’re here, duh.” he said that made you glare at him.

He pursed his lips for a while as you started arranging your things. “Did you just rolled your eyes at me?” you asked him and crossed your arms.

He then flashed a sweet smile before leaning closer, “No, baby. I would never. Can I have a kiss?” he asked with a smile. You frowned and pushed his face away using your pointer finger, face a bit flushed.

“S-Stop it.” you said that made him chuckle because you stuttered.

“H-How’s practice?” you decided to just ask him something random. He heaved a sigh then leaned back properly once again. His heart races just by hearing that from you.

Heeseung always loves it whenever you asked about his day. He don’t understand the relief it sends him as he tells you about his day, his worries even in the smallest manner. It just makes him feel that he’s not alone and that he always got you.

“Same same. I did well.” he sounds like a kid asking for a compliment or something and you really find him cute. It was a rare sight for you, a rare personality he just show to people he trust the most.

“I know you did.” you smiled warmly before cupping his face using your free hand before caressing it a bit using your thumb.

His eyes close at the sensation before he turned his head a bit kissing your hand and smiling a bit.

Your days with Heeseung just kept better and better and you can’t even ask for something more. You’re letting yourself enjoy his company but deep inside you, the fear was still there pretty much still visible.

You were stunned at your position as you watch him walked over the center of the wide field, it was their practice. You didn’t told him you’re gonna watch today. He was all focused, brows hardly furrowed as he he roamed his eyes around observing his surroundings. He sports his rugby jersey, a big numbers 01 was printed behind it. Number 1, it truly suits him very well. He’s the ace and is very known because of his natural talent in the sport.

“Lee Heeseung is really hot.” your head then snapped at the side as you heard those who’s beside you. It was two girls and like you, their eyes were fixed at the field.

Slowly, it dawned into you, that Lee Heeseung is not just Heeseung. He’s Lee Heeseung, the handsome ace player of the school’s rugby team. He’s way out of your league. You bit your lower lip as your heart tighten at the sudden thought that you don’t deserve him.

“You’re going to watch my game, right?” you were stunned when you heard his soft voice asked you while you’re at the classroom one day. He don’t have practice today and like always, he was with you.

While you’re busy doing a schoolwork, he’s beside you watching silently. He was contemplating whether to ask you that or wait for later but he just couldn’t wait anymore. He just wants to know and to make sure you are gonna watch. You are important for him and he knows he will surely do very well if you’re going to be there. He pursed his lips and gulped nervously.

You heaved a sigh, “I’m s-sorry but no.” you cleared your throat and tried hard not to look at his direction. You don’t want to see his disappointed or sad face because you’re afraid you’ll break.

You decided to stay away from Heeseung or at least prevent yourself from being too attach to him. You are already attached, very attached actually and staying away from him was dreadful. He blinked twice.

“You’re kidding right?” he asked, a hopeful tone can be clearly heard from it.

You sighed heavily before you turned your head towards his direction, n “No, I’m not kidding.” you seriously and turned away.

Heeseung was sad right away after he heard that. He knew from then on something was going on between you. He was confused as to why you suddenly grew cold towards him. As far he remembers, you two were okay. But these days, he noticed you are distancing yourself.

He clenched his jaw hardly before he nods his head before shutting his mouth and rested his back at his chair. He went silent and it was hurting you more than it hurts him. You wanted to just take it back and pull him into a tight hug then tell him you didn’t mean it, that you will go to his game and will cheer him with all your heart.

“You what?!” you bit your lip as guilt once again ate you up.

Your friend let out a heavy sigh, “I j-just think he’s really not serious you know?” you said.

She gave you that weird look like as if you’re an idiot. Well, maybe you do think you are really an idiot for hurting him that way. But you also can’t just ignore your thoughts and fear. You aren’t used at this kind of things and it scares you so much.

“Y/n, Heeseung had never treated anyone like how he treated you. If only you give him your trust and give the two of you a chance… you’ll see.” She said, eyes full of nothing but sincerity.

She really finds the two of you very cute. The way you two stares at each other, it was pretty much easy to tell how you two are in love with each other.

“Anyway, see you on Monday, I guess?” she said, eyes looking sad.

You gave her a nod and a small nod before you walked towards home. Your heart ache once again when Heeseung came into your mind. Even if you made him upset a while ago, he still offered you a ride home like usual. And of course, trying to really stick unto your plan to stay away, you declined.

“What the fuck are you doing here lee heeseung?” you hissed at him when you saw him in front of your apartment the first day of their season play-offs. he got his serious face plastered over his face as he stare at you, “Come watch my game or else I won’t play.” he said seriously that left you dumbfounded.

“I pretty much remember I told you that I won’t go.” You gulped and kept your serious face, fist slowly balling as you try to keep your emotions altogether.

His eyes reflected pain, “Baby,” he called softly.

You nearly broke down, the way he called you were still the same. Soft and full of affection. “Just go to your game, Heeseung,” you were so eager to make him leave because you know you wouldn’t hold it in any longer.

His eyes didn’t look away and that hurt you even more. He sighed and went closer that caught you off guard. He stretched his hand and cupped your face then he showed a small smile.

“I don’t know what happened baby.” He started and caress your face.

“But I will just wait until you decided to tell me. I will wait for you. I love you, hmm?” He said seriously and then he leaned close and placed a kiss at your forehead.

You were stunned that you didn’t even realize he walked away from you already. A tear left your eyes as you unconsciously entered your apartment, mind still preoccupied by Heeseung. You don’t know how long you’ve been spacing out but you snapped back to reality when you heard your phone ringing.

“Hello?”

“Y/n?! Where are you?”

“Home.” You weren’t in the mood to deal with your friend right now.

“You have to go here at the game!” she sounded like she’s really in panic that it made you worry.

“Why?”

“Something’s not right! Lee Heeseung’s at the bench and not playing, saying he isn’t in good condition.” Your mouth gapped as you hurried yourself to dress up.

“Hyung, you good?” Jungwon asked after he took a big gulp from his water bottle. His hyung was at dazed, wearing his jersey but refusing to play.

They did notice his sudden sadness for a few days already. He already figured out you have something to do with this but he couldn’t bring himself to ask his friend. He feels like he doesn’t know how he will approach him at this kind of matter because he had never been like this.

“I don’t know.” His tone was unsure and almost like he isn’t Lee Heeseung.

Their coach was frustrated. They know they can come up with a solution to at least win the game, but it sure will be difficult because their play will be messed up without Heeseung. He doesn’t want to force him play if he said he’s not in the condition because that may just make the situation even worst.

They were busy discussing something when something caught Heeseung’s attention. It was a time-out and so both teams are at the side and the field was vacant.

“Yah! Lee Heeseung!” you shouted with all your power.

Heads automatically snapped over your direction. If its normal day, you will feel embarrassed but not today. You have got more important things to deal with. Heeseung’s lips gapped open at the sight of you. Slowly, he stood up from the bench to get a good view of you.

“You better get your ass in that game or else I won’t date you!”

He blinked twice before he turned over their coach. His whole team was looking at his way, his friends got a teasing smile plastered over their faces.

“I’ll play, coach.” He mumbled that made their coach smile.

The whole crowd cheered when Heeseung got inside the field. He turned his head over at your direction while you walk towards where your friend is seated. He was staring at you like as if he’s asking for something.

You bit your lip, “I love you!” and with that he broke into a smile and suddenly his face turned serious to focus himself in the game.

As expected they won and you were cheering so hard as you jumped together with your friend, celebrating. Heeseung waste no time to go ran his way towards you. You squealed as he carried you and twirl you around.

“Do you mean it?”

“Mean what?” your face then blushed when it suddenly occurred to you.

“That you love me?” he asked, his big eyes were hopeful.

“Of course. I really love you.”

He smiled widely before he leaned in to kiss you at your lips. The whole crowd cheered and you couldn’t even feel embarrassed by the fact that you are being kissed by him around a lot of people. All you can think about is that he was kissing you, Lee Heeseung was kissing you in front of them.

“I love you more.”

main master-list

attention, please! master-list

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whatsk-poppinhomies · 1 year

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A Million Miles of Heartbreak Pairing : Sim Jaeyun x F!Reader TW : long distance relationship ; breakups ; generally angsty ; Jake is kind of an asshole ; Word Count : 1.4k A/N : Starting off the New Year with a quick angsty one! Let's go!!

“Oh man, have you seen the new trainee? She’s so cute.” Jake said as he sat beside the guys at the table in the cafeteria. He had managed to pass by her on the way down to get lunch, and it was like seeing the girl of his dreams, it was almost like she was haloed in the fluorescent lights that hung in the ceiling, he could barely keep his eyes off of her. “Think she might be the one honestly. I’ve never seen anyone so beautiful.” He mused, earning himself chuckles, eyerolls, and sounds of disgust from the other six guys around the table.

“Then go talk to her. Don’t tell us about it.” Jay grumbled, his nose wrinkled in disgust. “And don’t let your heart eyes mess up your practice. Just… pretend like she’s watching or something.” Jake grumbled incoherently under his breath at Jays clear lack of interest in the conversation, but quickly turned his attention to Sunghoon who seemed mildly curious. It felt like he just had to talk about it, he had to talk about her. He had only seen her once and she already took over every corner, nook, and cranny of Jakes mind, and he didn’t ever want her to leave it.

The hands on the clock lined up perfectly, just as they did every single day, to the time where you’d jump on your computer and call your boyfriend. He was the love of your life, and you couldn’t wait until you were actually able to be with him in person. It was crazy just how much you were able to love someone over the internet, someone that you had never spent a day with in real life, but you spent every single day with through your computer screen at least for an hour or two, and for the both of you, that was enough. The promise of being able to see him, being able to hear his voice, that’s what kept you going throughout the day, that’s what kept you happy.

The call tone chimed in your headphones as you waited for him to pick up, and you felt like every single weight that had been on your shoulders were removed when you saw his face come up on your screen. “Hey!” He called out to you, his smile making your heart skip a beat when he flashed it to you. “I’ve got something amazing to tell you!” He said, and you couldn’t help the excitement that swelled in your chest at his words.

“I have something amazing to tell you too!” You exclaimed back, and you did. You had managed to purchase tickets to go to South Korea so you could see him in person, having saved up all the money you had made the last couple months and requesting time off work so you could go out there. The trip was booked for next week, and while you wanted it to be a surprise for him, you also needed someone to pick you up from the airport. “You can go first though. Do you have a big concert coming up, or a tour?” You hadn’t heard anything about either of the two, and you hoped that your plans didn’t class with his schedule.

“Alright, alright… So…” His breaths were coming out quicker now, more heavy, it was like being in a wind tunnel in your headphones, but he seemed so excited, so you simply turned down the volume and listened intently to what he had to say. “There’s this new trainee at the building… Oh man… She’s so perfect, so beautiful. She’s like, the perfect girlfriend. I think I’m gonna talk to her, get to know her, ask her out. What do you think?”

Had you heard him wrong? That would be impossible. You couldn’t have possibly heard his entire plan wrong… But… It didn’t make any sense to you and it felt like your head was spinning as you tried to wrap your brain around what he said. “I… I thought… I’m your girlfriend… We’ve been dating for two years…” You mumbled, the disappointment and hurt that you were feeling was evident in your voice.

His eyes wavered as he seemed to look around the room that he was in, and he’d take a deep breath as if he were about to talk, and then let it out in a heavy sigh, the process repeated about three times before he finally spoke. “Of course you are… I just thought that while we were waiting to see each other, to be together… Well, you know…” He shrugged his shoulders, his teeth barred as he inhaled sharply through them. “I mean, let’s be fair here… You can’t really have a life with someone over the computer. There’s never going to be anything really there.”

You nodded your head in agreement although his words came as the biggest slap in the face. It was like your heart was being ripped from your chest and all you could do was sit and watch as he squeezed it in his hands until it stopped beating. “It’s not like I wasn’t trying…” You mumbled, unable to even look at him through the screen anymore. He was the love of your life, you truly thought that there would be something there between the two of you, you felt that there already was, but that clearly wasn’t a shared feeling. “I even… I bought tickets… To come out there…”

His lips parted into a small o as he watched you, and even though he wasn’t really there, you could feel his eyes on you through the screen. “Really? Well… When were you supposed to come out? Was that what… Was that what you were going to tell me?” You weakly nodded, your head still lowered as you looked down at your phone screen, the email for the tickets pulled up and your tongue in your cheek as you stared at it. “You can still come out. I still want to see you… I didn’t know that… Hey… Come on, baby… Look up at me.”

The pet name that would usually have you gushing or squealing now had you feeling disgusted and foolish, your skin crawling and the hairs on your neck standing on end. “So… If I didn’t have the tickets… You’d just go about your pursuit of the new trainee?” You whispered, your thumb hovering over the button for the refund. “I thought you really liked me… That you really wanted to be with me. You said that we’d be able to make this work… That you wanted this to work.” You shook your head, closing your eyes and taking a deep breath in an attempt to ward off the tears and fight back the sob that was building in your throat. “You lied… You didn’t want it to work, you didn’t even think it would… You just strung me along because it was convenient for you until you found someone that you could really be with. I was supposed to come out next week… Surprise!” You said unenthusiastically, pressing the refund button and finally looking up at the screen, scowling at him directly through the webcam. “But I’m not. You can spend that week chasing after the new trainee that would be the perfect girlfriend.” You mocked him, finding joy in the look of regret that was painted on his face. “Have fun.”

“Y/N, that’s not what I want, I was just-” But before he could finish you ended the call, pulling off your headphones and placing them off to the side of your desk as you got up and walked over to your bed. You should have known this would happen, you should have known that it would never be real, but you were so blinded by the love that you had for him that you didn’t want to face that reality. Now you had been hit with it, blindsided by it, and while you had done well in acting unbothered by it when he was still on the call, now that you were alone you could cry, you could have that breakdown that had been building inside of you from the moment he uttered the first word about the new girl.

Long distance relationships weren’t always awful, they sometimes worked out, but a long distance relationship with someone like him was destined to fail, and in the end, you were the one that was left broken hearted and crying into your pillow. He would move on and ultimately forget that it ever happened, he was far too busy to let someone like you fog his thoughts, but you had just the right amount of free time to have your heart broken, to let the thought of him and what you wished could have been plague every waking and sleeping moment of your day.

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whatsk-poppinhomies · 2 years

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✘ Apocalypse Now (18+)

✘ Synopsis : They were going on a world tour, and while the thought excited you, you couldn’t help but feel a lingering sense of dread as well. Call it luck, call it a premonition or fate… Something made you send that message, unsure of if they’d even read it. Now the world was ending, and standing on your front porch in a state of panic were seven men seeking shelter from the end.

✘ Genre : Angst ; Apocalypse AU ;

✘ TW : angst ; end of the world ; apocalypse au ; suggestive at times ; jealousy ; fear ; gore ; horror ; anxiety ; panic ; sometimes fluffy?? ; lots of cursing

✘ Pairing : Heeseung, Jay, Jake, Sunghoon, Sunoo, and Jungwon x F!Reader

✘ A/N : No, Niki doesn’t have a chance because he is baby, but he will get attention in this fic, he’s moreso a little brother that Y/N will take care of and protect with every ounce of her being because he is baby. <3

✘ Schedule : Will be updated when I can. ATM I’m in driving school, so I can’t stay up late, but once that’s done, I’ll be able to update as often as possible. I just didn’t want this idea to slip my brain.

✘ Started : 20220710 ✘ Ended : 20220729

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✘ Masterlist ✘

I. a foolish request

II. a shortage of time

III. a sudden knock

IV. not enough room

V. and 1 becomes 8

VI. sleeping arrangements

VII. breakfast in hell

VIII. we all fall down

IX. roll out

X. out of the blue

XI. the nightmare begins

XII. silent footsteps

XIII. shot through the heart

XIV. the sun and the rainfall

XV. never let me down

XVI. personal jesus

XVII. sweetest perfection

XVIII. the things you said

XIX. it’s no good

XX. the bottom line

XXI. a world full of nothing

XXII. but not tonight

XXIII. here is the house

XXIV. it doesn’t matter two

XXV. i want you now

XXVI. leave in silence

XXVII. it’s called a heart

XXVIII. get the balance right

XXIX. dreaming of me

XXX. everything counts

XXXI. see you

XXXII. new life

XXXIII. suffer well

XXXIV. precious

XXXV. condemnation

XXXVI. mercy in you

XXXVII. in your room

XXXVIII. walking in my shoes

XXXIX. one caress

XL. get right with me

XLI. the landscape is changing

XLII. and then…

XLIII. love, in itself

XLIV. two minute warning {epilogue}

Message me if you’d like to be added to the tag list for this fic. ♥️

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whatsk-poppinhomies · 2 years

Text

Did You Add To My Playlist?

Summary : College wasn’t supposed to be fun, you were there to get your degree and get the hell out, that’s all. Your plans were thrown for a loop when the four guys that you shared your classes with all decided to take advantage of your lost phone, adding songs that they had made themselves into your playlist. What had started as a dare, a bet of sorts among the four guys turned into each of them falling for you. Now the question wasn’t who would win the bet, but who would win you. ( 18+ ) Pairing : Enhypen Hyung Line x F!Reader Genre : college!smau Romantic Dramedy TW : cursing ; angst ; fluff ; suggestive content ; attempt at being funny ; fighting Schedule : Start : 20220911 End : TBA

Currently on an indefinite hiatus

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♬The Peanut Gallery ♬Soundcloud Fuckboys & Co.

♬ Prologue

♬ You Put The U In Fun

♬ The Perfectionist

♬ Feeling Greasy

♬ Issues

♬ Return Policy

♬ Unwanted Tuneage

♬ Over Amplified

♬ He Might Actually Be A Shit

♬ Fake News

♬ Weirder Than Usual

♬ Dropping The Bomb

Coming Soon!

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whatsk-poppinhomies · 2 years

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Yang Jungwon ~Coming Soon~

Lee Heeseung

When You Leave {yandere!angst}

Park Jongseong

All Hearts Break At Least Once {Angst}

Sim Jaeyun

A Million Miles Of Heartbreak {Angst}

What A Day {Angst/Fluff}

Park Sunghoon

Ice Prince {Angst/Fluff} (5.2k)

Kim Sunwoo

CoffeeO'Clock {Fluff} (14.9k)

Nishimura Riki ~Coming Soon~

Group Headcanons / Reactions

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whatsk-poppinhomies · 2 years

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XIII. shot through the heart

✘ Synopsis : Sunghoon has been following you around like a lost puppy lately, much like Niki has as well. Jungwon can’t seem to understand what’s drawing them to you, what’s drawing him to you too. Maybe it’s the fact that you saved them… it couldn’t be anything more than that… could it?

✘ Pairing : ??? x F!Reader

✘ TW : unreasonable jealousy ; one-sided pining ; reader confusion ; awkwardness ; tension ; all of this on top of what’s going on outside ;

✘ Word Count : 1.8k

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Everywhere you went, Niki and Sunghoon seemed to go as well. If you were in the kitchen preparing food, they were right there beside you helping you get things ready, quietly joking and laughing with you. You didn’t seem to mind it either as their shoulders or elbows would nudge into you, causing you to sway or stumble as a twinkling giggle escaped you.

Jungwon couldn’t understand it, and it’s not like he wasn’t trying to, it was quite the opposite in fact. He wanted to know what had changed, what had caused them, what had caused you to become so comfortable. If he remembered correctly, he could hear in his mind the day that Sunghoon had slipped into your room and talked to you, the sound of the two of you conversing quietly about your families and your siblings. Is that what had made the two of you bond almost overnight?

The morning that Niki had walked out of your bedroom instead of the bathroom where they had all assumed he had been, it had sent a shockwave through all of the members, well, not exactly all of them. The only guy who didn’t seem phased by it was Sunghoon who simply watched the maknae leave and then went back to folding up the blankets to place to the side.

There was a lot going on, not even just outside of the four walls of the apartment building, but inside as well. It seemed like every time you’d start to get more comfortable, it would be with one specific person instead of all seven of them, even though all seven of them lived in your apartment with you. Was there a process to it? Maybe you just needed to go through the motions of getting to know each and every one of them as people, regular people who had real lives and real families. Maybe you needed to level with them to know that they were just like you, and it was easier for you to do that on a one by one basis instead of all at once.

He wasn’t truly sure, and maybe he was just coming up with reasons for what was going on to try to write off his own jealousy at the situation, but he knew that he wanted to be the next one who got closer to you. He didn’t care what it took, he’d cut the line, he’d cut corners, he’d do anything just to be able to be in the little clique that seemed to have formed in your apartment that consisted of only you, Niki, and Sunghoon.

“Can you get me the sugar out of one of the bags, Hoonie?” You called out, not even turning your head to look at the man that you had called for, only listening to the sounds of quick footsteps and a light grunt which you assumed to be Sunghoon getting up to grab what you had asked for.

“Here you go…” The voice wasn’t Sunghoons, and when you turned around to grab the item from the extended hands you saw Jungwon, his cheeks dimpled as he smiled up at you, and for a moment it was… awkward, as he continued to look at you and you didn’t really know what to say, so you turned back to preparing the meal that you were working on. “I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable… I’m not used to being in situations like this.” He murmured out after a moment of extended silence that filled the space between the two of you with awkward tension.

With a soft hum of acknowledgement you turned to look at him, your smile as soft as his was when your eyes met again. “I don’t think any of us are used to situations like this…” You agreed, letting your eyes trail between the boy's smiling face and the food that you still had to prepare. “What’s funny though is…” You poured the cup of sugar that you had measured out into the pan with the carrots that the men had found in the cold stockroom. “You all seem more nervous than I am… And you’d think I’d be having daily conniption fits over the fact that there’s seven super famous dudes in my house. Niki teased me about it before.” You laughed lightly at the memory of Niki mocking you, shaking your head to rid your mind of the thought. “It’s alright though, I don’t bite… We’re both working towards the end goal of being alive if this is ever over with.”

Mmhm he murmured, leaning against the counter to watch you cook, his arms crossed over his chest, trying not to look at you too long, but he couldn’t really help it. Being this close to you let him see just how beautiful you really were in the low light that the candle casted on you. What was crazier is the fact that he had been the first one to comfort you really, he had been the one to wipe your tears and try to help you fall asleep, yet he felt so left out when it came to Niki and Sunghoon. Did he have to try harder? Would that even work? “Did you go to college?” He asked, trying to start some form of small talk so that he was just standing there. He wanted to know more about you, he wanted to know what you were like, and wanted you to feel just as comfortable with him as you did with the two others.

You shook your head as you poked a fork through one of the chopped carrots, holding it up to Jungwon who gladly took the bite, nodding his head with approval as the caramelized carrot seemed to evaporate on his tongue. “I didn’t go to college. I started teaching myself programming when I was like… twelve. I always loved computers and stuff, so, I wanted to get a job in that field, so I learned everything that I had to know and… Now there’s no power and I have no job.” You shrugged your shoulders, letting out a humorless chuckle. “Kind of sucks really.”

Your hand had been on the counter, leaning against it as you continued to stir the carrots, and Jungwon did what he felt like he had to do, placing his hand on top of yours and rubbing his thumb over your knuckles. “If it hadn’t have happened, we wouldn’t be here though…” He brought up a point that you hadn’t thought about before, but now that you were, you didn’t really know how to feel about it.

“I’m sure none of you really want to be here.” You mumbled, checking on the boiling water for the noodles that you were about to make. What you hadn’t seen was Jungwons head tilt to the side, slightly upset that you were assuming the way he felt, but he didn’t say anything yet, feeling like you had more to say. “I mean… If the world hadn’t gone to hell in a handbag, you’d all be finishing up your tour and going back home. You all wouldn’t even know that I exist. I’m sure that once things do end and you’re all able to leave… You’ll go back home and try your best to push these memories into the back of your head. You’ll want to forget, and that’s okay.”

Jungwon swallowed thickly, watching your face closely and picking up immediately on the sight of your bottom lip trembling and the soft sniffles that were muffled out by the sound of the water boiling. No one else would have been able to hear the fact that you were crying, or at least trying not to cry, but he could see it, and he could hear it. “I’m glad to know that you exist…” He whispered, his hand now squeezing yours lightly. “The circumstances aren’t… the best… but if this is what it took to meet you, then I’m glad it happened.” You eyed him out of the corner of your eye, in a clear state of disbelief at what he was saying. “I’m serious, and if things were to go back to normal tomorrow and we were told there was a flight back to Korea… I don’t think I’d want to leave just yet.”

Your lips were parted and he watched your chest rise with the deep breath that you took in, blinking quickly as you focused on the food in front of you. “You’re just saying that because you feel like you’re stuck with me…” You whispered, the words having an effect on you that had your tone changing. “You don’t have to lie to me.”

Jungwon shook his head, his hand lifting to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear, his dimples only growing deeper as he moved into your line of vision. “You say it as if being stuck with you is a bad thing.” He teased, lightly booping your nose with the tip of your finger and having to catch himself from leaning in to kiss you right then and there when your nose scrunched up adorably in response. “I’d never lie to you… I truly like being here with you.” He whispered, backing up to look at you, being able to see past you into the living room where 12 eyes were glued to Jungwons every move, but he didn’t care, he was just glad to finally be at this stage with you. “So, do you need help setting up for dinner?”

You nodded your head before motioning to the cabinet where the plates and bowls are. “If there’s ever another apocalypse, I’m stocking up on trashable plates, bowls and silverware.” You joked, and while it probably seemed like nothing to you, to Jungwon he felt like he had really made it, he had gotten closer to you. The sound of your laughter only further confirmed it for him, but he could feel the tension coming from the other side of the divider. “Let them know dinner will be done soon?”

Jungwon nodded, his feet feeling light as air as he walked into the living room, and it was like walking through a cloud of smoke. Everything was fine when he was beside you, but now that he was surrounded by the other guys, it almost felt hard to breathe. “Y/N said dinner will be done soon…” He whispered, almost choking on his words from how uncomfortable things felt.

“Oh did she?” Sunghoon practically snapped, but he stayed seated, his voice still low enough that you wouldn’t be able to hear him, but all the members could. “Tell her we said thanks, but make sure to brush your fingers through her hair and get in her face first since apparently that’s how you communicate.”

In that moment, it finally hit him. He wasn’t the only one that felt the way he did for you. How stupid was it to fall in love in a time like this, to feel these overwhelming emotions in a time like this… It wasn’t wise, and if things didn’t go well, you’d end up being the most hurt in the process. All of this, yet Jungwon wasn’t going to give up, he wasn’t going to move over and let Sunghoon have you.

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whatsk-poppinhomies · 2 years

Text

XXIV. it doesn’t matter two

✘ Synopsis : a week had passed and the cabin felt no closer to home than the guys had hoped it would. you felt empty, void of any emotion, and you wanted so badly to feel something, anything. Heeseung was the only one you trusted at this point, so you asked him to help you, to help you feel something, to give you something akin to a love that you knew you’d never get in this world.

✘ Pairing : ??? x F!Reader

✘ TW : lack of emotions ; hesitancy ; but still consensual don’t worry ; reader literally needs something ; suggestive content ; sexual activity ; not really descriptive though ; soft praise ; Heeseung says the L*** word ; 18+

✘ Word Count : 2.1k

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How long could one person stay inside a bedroom? How long could one person live off the crumbs as the bottom of a chip bag that had been opened a week prior? How long could someone go without human interaction? Heeseungs head was filled with these questions, although they weren’t aimed towards himself, they were about you.

Once you had stepped foot into the cabin, you had practically barricaded yourself in the bedroom, treating all of them as if they were the strangers that you had once been trying to keep out of your apartment. Even though he knew why you didn’t want them anywhere near you, he still worried about you, he still wanted to see you, he wanted to know that you were okay.

The thing is… They hadn’t realized that what made the apartment a home was you, it was your presence that somehow brought them closer together while simultaneously tearing them apart. You gave them all a sense of comfort that they were ripping away from you. It wasn’t fair, but they needed you, probably way more than you needed them.

He’d stay up late, opting to sleep in the living room instead of the one of the two other bedrooms just so he could listen to your door creak open, the soft padding of your feet across the floor as you went into the kitchen to get yourself a drink. He wanted so badly to wake up, or pretend to wake up, just so he could talk to you, but he was so scared of what you might say to him that he opted to stay quiet, listening to the sound of your receding footsteps and the sound of your door closing once more.

It had been a week, and the week felt longer than ever without you around. Cooking wasn’t fun, and the meals didn’t ever come out the way that they did whenever you’d make them. He’d make sure that Jay would save you a plate, and then Niki would attempt to deliver it to you, but you’d always tell him to leave it by the door. They’d all sit in silence, watching as your hand reached around the wood to grab your plate and then you’d disappear once again.

At this point, it seemed like they’d never see you again, and maybe that was their punishment for what they had put you through, it was well deserved, and as much as they all missed you being around, at least they hadn’t tried to pull you out of the room against your will. Maybe this was the turning point for them, maybe this was what it took for them to finally realize that what they had done was wrong.

Much like any other night, Heeseung laid on the couch in the living room, half awake listening for the sound of your door. He’d tense up when he heard it, and tonight was no different. Maybe tonight was the night he’d finally get the courage to go talk to you, he was starting to forget the sound of your voice. You’d get to the kitchen, and that courage would never muster completely, and he’d instead play sleep on the couch and hope that the chance would come again soon.

“Hee…” The sound of your voice had him rolling over, it sounded so close, and when he opened his eyes, he saw you there, knelt down beside the couch, your eyes glistening in the light of the candle that you were holding. Did one of the guys mess with you? Did they hurt you? Had they come into your room and try to talk again? “Sleep with me tonight…?” The question had thrown him, it had been a whole week since any of them had seen you, and you were coming to him to be your comfort.

Of course, on the inside it felt great to know that he was chosen above everyone else, but he couldn’t pretend to not be confused. “Are you alright?” He asked softly, sitting up on the couch and grabbing your hand, and your lack of response was more concerning than anything. “Y/N, you need to talk to me… Remember in the bathroom back at the-”

Mmhm you hummed softly, nodding your head quickly to emphasize the sound. “That’s why I came to you… I need you, Hee.” To feel wanted… to feel needed by you, it made him feel a lot of things, and he’d do anything that you wanted him to do, he’d follow you anywhere, and that’s why he got up off the couch and helped to pull you to your feet as he walked into the bedroom.

Strangely, it wasn’t as dusty as he thought it would be. It seemed fairly clean, and the candles that lined the dresser had cast a soft glow across the room. “Did you have a nightmare?” He questioned as he followed you in further, making sure the door was shut behind him before sitting on the bed beside you. You shook your head, gnawing on your bottom lip, your thumbs nervously twiddling in your lap. “Y/N, please…” He whispered, placing his hand on top of yours, and he heard you swallow thickly followed by a sharp intake of air that you let out in a soft sigh.

“Help me…” Your voice was so low that it was barely audible, but he heard it, and the expression had him more worried than before. When you looked at him, your eyes still were devoid of any emotion, it was like staring into a black hole. “I want to feel something… anything… please, Hee…”

He knew what you meant, and god, he’d be lying if he said he hadn’t been dreaming of a moment like this for forever, but it almost seemed wrong to be with you like that right now. “Y/N… You don’t mean that… You’re not in the right headspace right now, and…” It felt bad to deny you, to deny himself of what he knew he wanted, but he knew that he’d feel much worse if he gave in to his own wants when he wasn’t even sure if you knew what you were saying.

“I’m not drunk, Heeseung… I want you…” He slowly lifted his hand to cup your cheek, and while he saw the tear stains on them, they were all dry, you hadn’t cried in a long time, and he wasn’t sure if that were a good thing or a bad thing, but he also knew that he didn’t want to be the one who made you cry again. “You can say no… I just wanted you to know that I do know what I want… I’d still be okay if you just wanted to sleep though… Just stay with me?”

He leaned in, pressing his lips softly against yours, and while it pained him to know that his lips weren’t the first to be against yours, that pain didn’t overcome the excitement that coursed through him to finally be with you. The kiss was supposed to be quick, to let you know that he did in fact want you, but it was supposed to be the precursor to him telling you that it would be better to just go to bed, to think about it a little bit more. He didn’t expect your fingers to tangle in his hair, holding his lips against yours as you pulled him down on top of you on the bed, a soft whimper, or maybe it was a moan, vibrating through your lips and spreading against his.

“Y/N… I…” He was breathless, he was excited, he was torn, he could feel his pants becoming tighter and he wanted to give himself to you, to give you everything you thought you wanted, he just needed to be sure, he needed to be 100% sure. “Is this really… Is it what you want? Are you sure?” He asked, his voice just as quiet as yours as he looked down at you with doe eyes that were so soft, so sweet, he truly cared for you and he didn’t want to be the one to hurt you.

There was something about the dim lighting of the candles that casted the perfect shadow of your bodies across the walls. The sounds of your moans as he pushed into you, unable to contain his own sounds of pleasure, your arms draped over his shoulders as your back arched off the mattress to feel him better.

His lips would press against yours quickly whenever he felt like he was getting too loud, your moans muffled against his mouth as you held onto him tighter. “So good… you’re so beautiful…” He whispered, his cheeks flushed and his heart racing so fast that he swore you heard it.

This was a dream, it had to be. It didn’t even feel real, feeling you wrapped around him, your body so warm, the way you glistened in the flickering candlelight, the way your lips parted, your tongue pressed against the roof of your mouth as little whimpers escaped you when he pushed deeper into you, hitting all the spots that you wanted him to.

“Hee…” You moaned his name and he swore that his heart soared. Your fingers moved up to his hair to pull him down to kiss you again, and he felt you tighten around him as your legs began to shake. This must be what it feels like to be in love, it’s got to be. The thought of you even getting close to any of the other guys had his stomach sinking and his eyes tearing up. He wanted to be the only one for you, the only one to be with you, the only one to love you like this.

He felt himself getting closer, his body tensing up as his lips moved from your to bury his face in the crook of your neck, his moan sounding more like a whine and his fingers digging into the sheets as he buried himself deeper into you, finding his release and filling you. “I’m… I’m sorry…” He whispered, lifting his head from your neck to look at you, brushing away the tiny strands of hair that clung to your sweat beaded forehead.

You sheepishly smiled, combing your fingers through his tousled hair and pushed yourself up enough to kiss him again. “It’s okay… Don’t worry about it…” And even though your actions were supposed to be sweet, your voice still was emotionless, your eyes were blank. Even still, he thought you were the most beautiful person he had ever laid his eyes upon, he felt like the luckiest man in the world to be able to be with you.

“I love you…” He murmured, his thumb brushing at your cheek as he looked down at you, immediately feeling like an idiot for confessing to you like that. It probably wasn’t the right time, and he was sure that you probably only thought he was saying it because of what the two of you had just done, and while the moment had only made his feelings grow stronger for you, it didn’t mean that he hadn’t felt this way for you long before. “Let’s get some sleep…” He whispered, trying to change the subject before his words could stick in your mind any longer, slipping out of you and rolling over to lay beside you.

You hummed softly, rolling over to face him as you buried your face in his chest, his arms wrapping around you. “Thank you, Hee…” He let out a quiet mmhm in response, his fingers tracing shapes over the bare skin of your back to soothe you to sleep.

You had long since fallen asleep, but Heeseung laid still as a statue, staring up at the ceiling as all of his emotions bundled into one. Dread, excitement, love, fear, anxiety… He had told you that he loved you which was probably the dumbest thing he could have done right now. He had earned your trust enough to be the one that you came to when you needed someone, and now he potentially fucked everything up by dropping the word so carelessly. Would you start to avoid him like you tried to avoid the others? It scared him. He felt like he had just gotten you, he felt like he really had you, like you were his, but even now, with your eyes shut and tired breaths, he felt like he had pushed you away. Tomorrow morning he’d be nothing more to you than what the other guys were, and he could already feel his heart breaking at the realization.

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whatsk-poppinhomies · 2 years

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♬ Dropping The Bomb

Word Count : 1.4K

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He smelled of expensive cologne and it stung your nose, the scent so strong it almost seemed like he bathed in it, but you knew that it was only because expensive perfumes held the strongest fragrance, and Jay was the type of guy who got nothing but the best. “Thank you for… Inviting me over, and not making me sit through that entire lecture… Class wouldn’t have gone by this fast.” He murmured as he took a step back, although his hands still lingered at your hips as he looked at you. “I hope I get to see you again… Maybe not for class purposes…” It was strange to see him being so shy, but then again, you didn’t exactly know him from a pebble on the side of the road, and maybe the way he was with his friends was all an act.

“You will… Don’t worry…” You placed your hands over his, moving them off your hips and placing them back at his sides, trying not to make it seem like you were basically disgusted by his touch, but more so that the lingering contact made you feel more nervous, and he seemed to understand, shoving his hands into the pockets of his sweatpants. “My roommate is gonna be home soon so… I’ll see you around…” You whispered, smiling warmly to him as he backed out of your apartment, his head nodding until he had no other choice but to either back into the wall on the other side of the hallway or turn the other way.

The sweet act that you had put on for Jay and Sunghoon had eaten up all of your energy, and once they all were handled for the day and the front door had been shut, you felt like you could breathe again, really breathe, and now you could tell everyone about what was really going on.

“I love that you called an emergency meeting to the apartment as if we weren’t all gonna come here anyway after everything that happened today.” Beomgyu said as he walked through the front door, dropping his bag down on the floor beside the couch before dropping down beside you. “So tell us… Why was Jay Park in your apartment today?”

He nudged your side playfully but the insinuation had you gagging as you shoved him away from you. “Ew… Don’t even let your mind take off with that shit, that’ll never happen.” You shook your head, trying to shake the thought from your mind before it even had time to settle as you pulled your phone from your pocket. “So, the four of them are a bunch of assholes, they stole my phone. But, they didn’t steal it because they’re just assholes… they wanted to play a game with me… I didn’t even know about it.”

Beomgyus head tilted to the side with confusion. “What… like… The pool game on iMessage? Why didn’t they just ask for your number? I mean… The game isn’t even that good.” He shrugged his shoulders, letting out a loud sigh as he relaxed against the cushions, and you were stunned into a momentary silence at just how dense he was being right now. Even Chanmi and Eunae were astonished by him. “What? Am I wrong? The game is awful, there’s so many other games to play.”

You didn’t even look at him as you placed your hand over his mouth to silence his rambling, looking now at the girls who sat in front of you, their expressions showing just how invested they were in what you were about to say. “They wanted to humiliate me… They wanted to play me like a dummy… And you know that I won’t let that slide.” Beomgyu licked your palm, causing you to pull your hand away in disgust before wiping it along the sleeve of his sweater, but he didn’t care at this point, he was agitated now, the news that someone was trying to intentionally hurt you bringing out the big brother mentality in him.

“They wanted to what?!” He screeched, pushing himself up off the couch to stare down at you now. “So you invite him into your house?! What are you thinking?!” He groaned loudly, running his fingers roughly through his hair as he started pacing the floors, and you knew that he just needed to get it all out before you were able to tell him what you were really doing, you knew that once he knew the plan, he’d be all for it, especially now. “What’s their numbers? What’s their addresses?! I’m gonna beat the shit out of them!”

Quiet shushes left you as you patted the seat beside you, urging him to sit down again, and he did, he finally listened to you for once, although you weren’t sure if he was actually listening or if he just didn’t want to pace anymore, either way, he was sitting and that’s what was important because you wouldn’t have been able to talk if he was still moving around, you would have just gotten sidetracked. Now that everyone was basically quiet, aside from Gyus huffing and puffing, you could tell everyone what was really going on.

Their eyes widened for a split second before narrowing at you, their eyebrows furrowing as they listened to your plan. “No… no, Y/N… they’ll destroy you. If they find out what you’re doing… your reputation will be destroyed.” Chanmi whined, running her hands over her face nervously. “Sunghoon is a dick, and Heeseung is a genius, he’s gonna catch on. Plus, even if they don’t catch on… what are you going to do? Lead them all on just to crush them?”

You nodded your head in agreement, shrugging your shoulders as you sunk into the couch comfortably. “That doesn’t make you any better than them…” Eunae mumbled, crossing her arms over her chest. “Why not just call them out on their shit and let it go? Don’t stoop to their level…”

Looking to Gyu for some kind of acceptance that your plan was good, you found nothing but his awkward expression, his lips drawn into a thin line as he looked at Chanmi. “I don’t think this is a good idea. I know that you don’t care about your reputation… at least you put on an act that you don’t… but I know that if they humiliated you in front of campus you’d be destroyed. I don’t want that for you… I care enough about you to tell you this isn’t good.”

Rolling your eyes you pushed off the couch and went to the kitchen to grab yourself a drink. “So you’re completely okay with what they did? They stole my shit, they’re purposely trying to hurt me, and you just want me to let that shit slide? What the fuck?” You grumbled with your head in the fridge, pulling out your leftovers to have for dinner. “Being the bigger person doesn’t always mean backing down and letting the assholes do whatever they want. Maybe they need to be knocked down to size.”

You slammed the fridge shut, carrying your dinner to your room and shutting the door behind you, leaving the three in the living room contemplating what to do next. “Just let her be… She’ll realize this isn’t smart… She’ll get over it soon.” Chanmi murmured, running her hands through her hair as she stared at Beomgyu. “Don’t try to text her either.” She scolded, watching as his hand that had been in the process of pulling out his phone froze. “Just give her time to be alone. You know how she gets when she’s grouchy anyway. Let’s just order dinner and then we’ll check on her later.”

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whatsk-poppinhomies · 2 years

Text

XLIV. two minute warning {epilogue}

✘ Synopsis : how long had passed since the first slam of their fists on your door, their panic exceeding the usual limits. 3 months, no… it had been 2 years. 2 years of scavenging, 2 years of growing closer with these men who had once been nothing more than an idol group that you listened to while doing daily chores. They had all grown on you, they all held a special place in your heart that could never be replaced. Now that the world was slowly returning to normal, you knew that they too had to return to their own lives and you had to return to yours. You just hoped that somehow, you'd all still be a part of each other's lives no matter what.

✘ Pairing : ??? x F!Reader

✘ TW : bittersweet ; ending ; fluffy ; kind of sad ; readers family makes an appearance ; mainly fluffy though ;

✘ Word Count : 3.1k

✘ A/N : I never specify who reader ends up with because I'm sure we all have our own thoughts on who she should end up with, so I left it open. You get to choose. Also, Y/N's family is so generic, I'm sorry, they didn't have that big of a part though. Anywho! I hope you all enjoyed the apocalyptic rollercoaster ride that was this series. Thank you to everyone who read it <3 Love y'all no shit <3

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The first month flew by, followed by the next two, and then the three after that… All of it leading up to now two years. Two years of fear, love, jokes, arguments, bickering, bonding, and so much more. Scavenging was done regularly, and you were still prohibited from going out with them, even though after a while the group would come back unscathed, talking about how there were barely any people around anymore and that they were usually the only ones out when they did go out to find more food. Niki was still prohibited by you from going out, and over the two years he had just stopped complaining about it.

Birthdays were celebrated in as normal a fashion as possible, and they’d usually go scavenging a day or two before the birthday just to make sure they got the right presents, and it had become a running joke that they were waiting for the bill to come in for all the stuff they got. Holidays were kind of like birthdays, and even though you all went without the usual festivities, it was just nice to be around each other, to still have all of you together.

Two years was a long time, and for two years you had been with all of them, growing closer to them than you had to any group of people in your life. Two years you had been with your boyfriend, the one person that you couldn’t live without, the one person who always found a way to make you smile, to make you feel more loved than you’ve ever felt before.

The bright light came suddenly, blinding you even through your closed eyelids, and you rolled over, burying your face in your pillow as you grumbled tiredly. “It’s too early… Close the curtains…” You groaned out, wrapping your arms around your head to block out the light, and then you heard him next to you, rolling over and letting out a groan of annoyance himself.

“I didn’t open them… maybe you forgot to close them before we went to bed…” But he knew that was wrong, you always kept the curtains shut at night, your fear of the wild deer jumping through the window had you scared to even open the curtains during the day usually. “I’ll make sure they’re shut…” He mumbled, kissing the top of your head before opening his eyes and freezing, staring up at the ceiling. “The lights are on…”

“Well turn them o-” You paused, rolling over in the bed and staring up at the fluorescent lights that let out an electrical buzz overhead. “The lights are on…?” You whispered, excitement bubbling up inside of you as you kicked the blankets off and wrapped your arms around your boyfriend who mirrored the action, nuzzling his nose into your neck before kissing you softly. “That means the phones… the phones should work, we can get in touch with someone…”

He hummed in agreement, but deep down, there was a sadness that came along with the power coming back on. “Let’s just try to go back to sleep for now, we can figure out what to do in the morning.” With the return of normalcy came the return of normal life, a life that wouldn’t feel so normal anymore. He had gotten used to just living, being with you and the rest of the guys without having to worry about his phone ringing, without having to worry about his past daily life. He got to be normal, as normal as before becoming famous, and he had gotten used to it, he loved it, and he didn’t really want to go back to his old life.

There was a slew of emotions that filled the cabin in the morning, the humming of an air conditioner that hadn’t been used in forever, the vents rattling as they tried to get used to the sudden air that ran through them, the whirring of the refrigerator motor that had been silent for what seemed like forever. The sudden noise that used to be common background noise seemed too loud now after their silence.

“When did it happen?” Jungwon asked, squinting his eyes at the bright light in the ceiling, watching mesmerized as the ceiling fan whirled as if it were a new sight to see. “I mean… what do we do now?”

It was a strange question, one that had gotten a lot of thought before, but now it was a thought that had been tucked away, no one really wanting to think of what to do if things had returned back to normal, but now they had…

“The power is on… maybe the tv works… we can check the news…” Niki said, running over to the little square box that had collected dust on the tiny table in the center of the room. It was an old television set, one that hadn’t been upgraded since the early 90’s. The sound of the picture tube starting up was louder than you had remembered, and you all looked like cavemen at this point, surrounding the tiny box in wonder as you watched the tiny pixels fill the glass square with color.

“I’ll try to phone while you try to find a channel.” Jay murmured, hesitantly stepping away from the tv screen to go to the old fashioned phone that sat in the kitchen. Everything was old here, and none of you had even noticed until it came time to use them again. “Does anyone remember any of the phone numbers for our managers?” He asked, looking over at the rest of the guys as you and Niki tried to change the channels on the tv to try to find one that wasn’t still set on an emergency alert.

“I think I have their numbers in my wallet… my wallet… where’s my wallet?” Heeseung asked himself, patting over his pants pockets and his shirt, and Sunghoon quickly grabbed it off the coffee table and tossed it to him before his eyes went back to the tv screen. “Do you think we’ll be able to reach them?” He whispered to Jay once he got closer and Jay only shrugged.

“It’s worth a shot.” He mumbled, looking over the numbers on the tiny card that Heeseung had slipped across the counter, dialing them onto the phone and holding the phone up to his ear. God, he couldn’t remember the last time he had actually heard a dial tone, it was a sound that didn’t even seem real to him, and it wasn’t just because of the lack of power, it was more so the fame that had made dual tones obsolete to him, anytime he called anywhere or anyone they’d pick up immediately, that or someone else would make the call for him.

“Anything?” Jake called from the living room, and Jay shook his head, and for the second time in the two years that the eight of you had been living together, you felt hopeless.

“It’s hopeless, no one is gonna find us out here.” Sunoo mumbled, and your heart tightened at his words. He was right, you all were literally in the middle of nowhere and you were sure that the last place anyone would check was a cabin in the middle of the woods, the road to it had become overgrown, something that had made you all feel safe for the longest time, but now it made you feel isolated.

“Let me try…” You spoke up, stepping away from the tv that had become a lost hope now. Your boyfriend looked at you with eyes that looked almost sad, but he wasn’t going to stop you from trying to help. “If my family is still at home, I can call them… we can go there, and then maybe… maybe it’ll be easier for your managers to find you.”

Why did your words break his heart? It’s not like you were actually trying to get rid of them, you were just trying to help, that was the reason they were with you in the first place. He leaned against the counter island, watching you with eyes filled with hope, but it was a hope that was the complete opposite of yours. He didn’t want anyone to answer, he wanted to continue on with the normal that had become normal to him.

“Mom?” You whispered breathlessly, and then he saw the tears that had him rushing into motion to wrap his arms around you, and then you sighed, a sigh of happiness and relief as he heard the muffled voice of someone over the receiver. “I’m okay… and everyone else… they’re okay too? Oh thank god… I… I miss you too. I’m okay, I promise… yeah… I’ll come home… Is it okay if I bring some friends? Yeah, yeah I know it’s weird to make friends during the end of the world, I know… yeah I know… you know them… yeah… okay… okay mom… I’m coming, I’ll see you soon… yeah… I love you too.” You hung up the phone, looking around at everyone before looking up at your boyfriend whose fingers were digging into your hips. “You wanna meet my family? I think we’ve been together for long enough, can’t hide you from them forever.”

He rolled his eyes, leaning in to kiss you before letting out a small chuckle. “I’ve been waiting to meet them for a while. Let’s go.”

It almost felt like a dream pulling up outside your home, watching the blinds pull back as you climbed out of the van. Your brother ran out the front door and it almost brought tears to your eyes when you saw how much he had grown since you last saw him. “You okay?” Your boyfriend asked, wiping away the tears from your eyes when he saw them begin to fall.

“Holy shit! Mom! She’s got those dudes from the band that she loved! Remember when she-“

“Shut up!” You called to him, the tears stopping immediately when you were reminded of just how annoying he was. “Don’t listen to him.” You whispered, grabbing your boyfriend's hand and pulling him towards the front door where your mom had taken your brother's place.

Her eyes were sheepishly apologetic as she looked between you, your boyfriend, and the rest of the guys who followed you into the house. “He hasn’t changed, has he?” She joked and you shook your head as you hugged her tightly, a new set of tears beginning to fall. “We’ve got a lot of catching up to do, two years of it… And you’ve got a lot of people to introduce me to. Do you think we have time?”

Your head nodded quickly as you followed your mom into the dining room where your dad and your little sister sat, but she wasn’t as little as you remembered her being either. “Do you guys have the internet working? I know it seems kind of crappy to ask when I first come home but… They need to get in touch with their families too…” You asked your mom, and she inhaled sharply through her teeth as she pulled her phone out of her pocket.

“Dial-up on mobile, it’s not the best. I think everyone is trying to use it at once… It keeps going out, and I don’t think they have the actual towers working yet.” She explained and you couldn’t help the disgruntled look on your face as you watched her unlock her phone to pass to you. “You can help me get the rooms ready for the guys while they all try to get in touch with their families.” You nodded, giving your boyfriend a quick smile and squeezing his hand reassuringly before following your mom up the stairs, leaving them to try to work out what to do in the living room.

It took a week before any of them were able to get a hold of anyone, and while it hadn’t come as a shock to you, it was to all of the guys that people had been sent to come look for them. Apparently they had traced the IP address of the message that you had sent them on Instagram two years ago back to your apartment, which they informed you had been burned to the ground at some point during the span of time.

It would have upset you before, but it had gotten to the point that material things didn’t really matter to you anymore, not after everything you had been through. You were just happy to still be here, to still have all the people that you loved and cared about all living in the same house, under the same roof together right now.

“You know, the power went out right as I was in the middle of the boss fight…” Your brother said as he started up the gaming system that groaned to life, having collected so much dust on the fan that he and you both were shocked that it even worked right now. Your brother and Niki had gotten close in the time that the guys all stayed with your family, and it was almost sad to see it because you knew that soon they’d all have to leave.

“Oh, dude… That sucks. Do you think it saved your data?” Niki asked, leaning closer to the tv screen as the title screen of the game started up. Your brother mumbled something that sounded like a threat to the console as he glared at the screen, and then a sigh of relief was let loose when he opened the save data and he was right where he had left off. “Sick! If you don’t get it, it’s my turn.” Niki said, his hands drumming against his lap as he watched your brother play the game, and you felt the tears begin to sting at your eyes as you watched them.

“We don’t have to leave…” Your boyfriend whispered from beside you, catching one of your falling tears on his thumb as he moved into your line of sight. “I’m sure the last thing on anyone’s mind is when the next Enhypen album is coming out.” His arm draped over your shoulder as he pulled you against his side, relishing in the way you seemed to mesh against him perfectly, like the two of you were made for each other, or maybe he had just been with you so long now that your bodies had adapted to connect to each other’s that way. “Our families are fine, we keep in touch with them daily. You don’t have to lose us.”

“I can’t keep you from your own families.” You mumbled, toying with his fingers that were clasped over your stomach, tapping your fingers against each of his nails as you continued to stare at the screen. “And I can’t leave mine behind… We’ve had two years… That’s more than what any other fan would ever get.” You nestled closer against his chest, biting back the choked out sob that was threatening to escape you. “And I’m sure we’ll keep in touch… And when the airports open back up, I’ll come to visit you.”

He sighed loudly, grabbing your hands to bring them up to his lips, kissing along your fingers before clasping his fingers with yours. “I didn’t spend two years of my life with you just to end up having to leave you. I’m not leaving you behind, so if you’re not going, neither am I.” It wasn’t up for debate, it was a fact. There was only one other option, one that he didn’t really know if it was good or not, but it was worth a shot. “Or… you, and your family could come with us? I know you’re not leaving them, and I’d never ask you to… but I’m not leaving you either… So…”

You looked up at him with puzzled eyes, and then you looked at your brother, and your mom who was in the kitchen with your dad, and your little sister who was going through her stuffed animal collection with some of the other guys who were listening intently as she told them the names. “They… We can’t just come over and… It wouldn’t work and…” He pressed his lips against yours to hush your worried rambling, not wanting you to overthink it, his hands cupping your cheeks as his lips stayed against yours, waiting for you to relax before pulling back.

“I am like… 99.999% sure that no one will care. The entire world fell apart, so if you and your family came with us, I don’t think anyone would question it. Plus… You saved us, and your family is housing us right now… And when we get back there, I plan on marrying you, so I want my in-laws close as well-” You smacked his chest, scrunching up your nose as you quietly mumbled for him to shut up, but his mouth fell open, fiending shock as he stared at you. “What? You think I’m joking? I’m not. I’ve never been more serious about anything, so… I mean, it was supposed to be a surprise, but if it makes the decision making easier for you…”

“I’ll talk to them about it.” You whispered, pushing yourself up to kiss him once more before relaxing against his chest, wrapping your arms around him to keep him close. “But if I have to stay here…” You began, and he didn’t even have to look down, lifting his finger up to press against your lips.

“If you stay, I stay… We’ll all stay. They all love you… No one is leaving you behind, and I’m not about to start a long distance relationship over the world's worst internet connection with the love of my life so… No one is getting left behind.” He kissed the top of your head before resting his chin against it, letting out a small sigh. It didn’t matter where you went, it didn’t matter where he went, no matter where it was, the two of you would be beside each other. He had been with you through the worst times in his life, he had seen you during the worst times of your life, he, you, and the rest of the guys had been together through what felt like the end of the world, and they weren’t all going to leave you. In a world that was taking its first steps towards being normal again, he wanted to take those first steps with you, and he would, he’d make sure of it, no matter what.

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whatsk-poppinhomies · 2 years

Text

XVIII. the things you said

✘ Synopsis : the sudden tension that filled your tiny apartment had you questioning whether letting the seven men in was a good idea. The constant arguing between the guys has you scared to even leave your room in the mornings. Following Nikis wake up call, Jungwon tries his best to help you.

✘ Pairing : ??? x F!Reader

✘ TW : arguing ; verbal fighting ; big doubts ; crying ; consolation ; attempt at relief by Jungwon ; kind of awkward ; a small kiss ; it was only a kiss ; Jungwon confession ; Jungwon soft hours but also Jungwon fucks up his own soft hours oof ;

✘ Word Count : 2.3k

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The nightly companionship of the members was supposed to be something that made you feel more comfortable, to ease your worries, but it only seemed to cause more problems in the apartment that had become a safe haven for the men, but to you, it was like a big bubble of stress that you couldn’t even escape.

At this point it seemed like it was a bad idea to have even asked for companionship in the first place. You’d rather just deal with the nightmares than to deal with the arguing and the awkwardness that followed the morning after. Every time you woke up, every single time, you felt like you needed to brace yourself for the glares and looks of disdain from the men who were already sitting up in the living room with their eyes glued to your bedroom door just waiting for you to walk out with another one of the members. You had no reason to feel shame for wanting to be comforted, for wanting to feel safe, but the way they looked at you made it seem like you had done something awful even though you knew you didn’t.

The constant bickering and fights that filled your living room had you questioning a lot of things, one of the main things was letting them into your apartment in the first place. It felt foolish, it felt dumb, it felt like one of the worst ideas you’ve ever had in your life. You had enough things to worry about, and now it felt like everything was building up on your shoulders and weighing you down to the point where you didn’t even want to get out of bed, or more so, like you couldn’t get out of bed in the morning.

Jungwon had slept beside you last night, and while he had been so sweet and so kind, he even placed pillows in between the two of your bodies just to make you feel more comfortable, but even still, you couldn’t let go of the dread that filled your body as you grimly looked forward to the awkward morning that you knew would come about as soon as the sun rose.

He had woken up before you, making sure to slip out of bed unnoticed so as to not wake you up and quickly exited to room to take the initial impact of the glares and stares and arguing of the guys. He knew you didn’t need that, he knew that you were already stressed enough as it is, he could hear you crying into your pillow at night, a sound that you had assumed he couldn’t hear. He didn’t even know what to do at that moment, mainly because he wanted so badly to comfort you, but at the same time he was livid at the men who were making you feel that way.

“You guys really need to chill the hell out.” He mumbled as he grabbed a cup to fill with water, taking a quick swig to rid his throat of its dryness. “She was crying all night, she’s stressed out, she doesn’t need your shit.” He finished, setting his cup down on the counter and moving into the living room to meet the eyes of the men who were still glaring at him.

All but Niki were there, the youngest still laying on the floor in your bedroom enjoying a peaceful sleep, none the wiser to what was going on just outside the bedroom door.. “Oh, I bet you really enjoyed making her feel better and wiping away the tears, bud.” Jake grumbled, running his hand through his hair before crossing his arms over his chest to shoot lasers in Jungwons direction.

“You all are pathetic.” Jungwon muttered, his lips sealing shut when he heard the door to the bedroom squeak softly, giving away the fact that it was being opened. Everyone watched, waiting to see you come out from around the door frame, but they were instead met with the sight of Niki, his hair sticking up in all directions and his eyes barely even opened as he stumbled into the kitchen to grab something to drink.

“You guys aren’t quiet at all…” He mumbled as he filled his cup, swigging it all back in a matter of seconds before setting it down quite loudly on the counter. “Maybe you all will shut up if you knew she was already awake, that she can hear you, and she’s literally crying her eyes out because she thinks it’s all her fault that you guys are like this.” The way he said it made it seem so nonchalant, but everyone could hear in his tone just how pissed he was. He refused to even step foot in the living room where everyone else was sitting, and other than laying out the facts for them, he didn’t say anything else.

“God dammit…” Jungwon muttered, turning to head back into your bedroom before any of the other guys could, but he was immediately stopped by Jay with a hand on his shoulder. “What?” Jungwon spat the word at him, whipping around to glare at his hyung.

Jay shrugged, his eyes glancing between your bedroom and Jungwons annoyed face. “I don’t know, I just think someone… like one of your hyungs should help her out. I mean… you probably won’t even know how to talk to her and-” He was cut short when Jungwon pushed him away, his teeth gritted with agitation and tears of anger brimming in his eyes. “I’m just trying to do her a favor, you know…” Jay continued, poised as ever, as if Jungwon wasn’t currently looking at him like he wanted to fight.

“You’re an arrogant piece of shit, you know that?” Jungwon hissed, his balled fists being shoved into his pockets to try to control the burning urge to punch Jay in the face. He knew that it wouldn’t help you at all, and it would probably only make you cry more than you were now, and that’s the last thing he wanted you to do. “Just leave her alone, okay? You don’t even… ugh… You just disgust me right now, leave me and her alone for the rest of the day. No one here needs your shit.”

He didn’t even wait for Jays response before turning back around and heading to your room, trying to calm himself down before taking a deep breath and rapping his knuckles against the door.

“No thank you… Have whatever you want for breakfast… I’m not hungry.” You mumbled in response to the knock, your face still very much buried in your pillow that was soaked with the tears that were falling steadily, as if you had an infinite amount being stored somewhere and it wasn’t planning on letting up anytime soon. The knock sounded again, and you lifted your head, assuming that whoever it was hadn’t heard you, but around the frame of the door popped Jungwons head, his dimpled cheeks showing as he smiled softly at you. “Did you leave something in here?” You asked, looking around the bed to see what he could possibly be missing, and in the small amount of time that your head was turned, he had slipped into the room and shut the door behind himself.

“Yeah… You.” He murmured, walking over to the bed and letting himself fall back on it at the end, his arms folded behind his head as he stared up at the ceiling that was now illuminated by the small amount of sun that broke in through the blinds. “You know we can’t have breakfast without you… You’re the only one that keeps us from ripping each other's heads off.” He turned his head to look at you, and you stared back at him incredulously.

“I’m the one causing you to want to rip each other’s heads off.” You muttered, rolling back over on your side and pulling the blankets up over your head. “I don’t know why… You guys didn’t hate each other when you first got here… What did I do wrong?” They were rhetorical questions, you didn’t really need an answer, you didn’t exactly want an answer either. The question hadn’t even been meant for him, you were mostly asking yourself the questions, your mouth just spoke what your mind was thinking at that moment.

Jungwon sat up, or more so, jumped up, crawling across the bed to be right next to you and pulling the blankets down from around your head. “Nothing. You did nothing wrong, Y/N, believe me.” He smoothed back the hair that had been haphazardly strewn across your face in the process of moving the blanket, his hands freezing on your cheek as he looked at you. “You’re not the cause of anything…” He whispered, his eyes wavering, not able to look into yours for more than a split second.

“Everyone hates me…” You choked out, turning your head away from his and moving away from his touch, his hand weakly falling to the pillow right beside your head. His mouth opened to speak, to disagree with you, but before he had the chance to, you continued. “Don’t try to tell me I’m wrong… I can see the way everyone looks at me when I walk out of my room in the morning… If looks could kill, I’d be dead a dozen times over, maybe more.” You buried your face back into your pillow and let out a sob that was barely muffled by fabric.

Hearing you say it made him beyond angry at the guys who were in the other room, but it would have been hypocritical to just be mad at them, knowing that he had shot the same looks when he was the one who would sleep in the living room instead of beside you where he wanted to be. It hurt too, to think that you thought that the looks were pointed in your direction when it was the complete opposite. “Nobody hates you… I promise you, I can swear on everything that I love… Nobody here hates you at all.” He hated vouching for the guys in any way, but he knew that he needed to in order for you to not feel like you were right because you weren’t. “And the looks… They’re not at you… They’re at the other guy.” You slowly lifted your head from your pillow to look at him quizzically. “They’re jealous…”

You scoffed, rolling your eyes at him as you gently nudged him with your elbow. “That’s ridiculous, Jungwon…” God, how his heart melted to hear his name come from your lips, he loved to hear it, he hated hearing you say anyone else’s name, and he knew that that was part of the problem. “Why would they be jealous? What is there to even be jealous about?” You really were oblivious to the fact that they were all pining over you, and he assumed that it was just because the world was ending and the last thing you wanted to think about was the possibility of six men falling for you at the same time, but that didn’t mean that it wasn’t happening.

His arm draped over you, turning you in his direction, his face just above your own and he heard you gasp softly at just how close he was to you. At least you weren’t pushing him away though, that was a start, right? “Because you’re beautiful… Because you’re sweet and you’re selfless and you treat us like we’re human, not just some idols that you happened to save during the apocalpyse. Because you’re real, and you saved us… And everyone out in that room is fighting for the chance to be in this room with you… And it’s quite adorable that you can’t see just how much I like you…” Without a second thought, his lips lowered down to yours, and while the guys had intermittently kissed the top of your head or your forehead, all of them seemed to be just kind sentiments to ease your mind. This was completely different, there was so much feeling behind it even if it only lasted a second, not even a whole second even.

“Jungwon… I…” You didn’t know what to say, and both of your eyes were wide now as you stared at each other, at a loss for words. You had taken everything that he had said to heart, you were finally beginning to understand what he was saying, beginning to understand what was going on, but before you even had a chance to react he had done that. It wasn’t bad… If you weren’t in a tiny apartment and boxed in with a bunch of other testosterone fueled guys, you would have actually allowed yourself to enjoy it, but now you were more worried.

What if the others found out? It would only irritate them more and you didn’t want to think about just how strongly they’d react if they found out that Jungwon had done what he did. “I’m so sorry… I… Didn’t mean that… At all…” He stammered, pushing himself up off the bed and backing away to the door, his reaction was like that of someone who had just seen the most disgusting, grotesque monster in the world, and all the words he said seemed to lose their meaning.

He ran out the door, slamming it behind him, the sound causing you to jump as your heart seemed to shatter into a million pieces. He hadn’t meant it, he probably didn’t even want to do it… So why did he? The questions began filling your mind, the words being screamed inside your head and there was nothing you could do to stop it, and the only sound that even muffled the screaming in your head was your own sobbing and your heart breaking.

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whatsk-poppinhomies · 2 years

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XXIII. here is the house

✘ Synopsis : as soon as the van pulled up out front of the cabin, Jake was the first one to reach back and pull you out, much to the frustration and annoyance of every other man in the car. tear streaked cheeks and glossy eyes blurred your vision as you were led into what you’d now call home. you were numb, numb to the attention, numb to the pain, and numb to whatever else would come next in this fucked up series of events.

✘ Pairing : ??? x F!Reader

✘ TW : bitterness : jealousy ; anger ; frustration ; annoyance ; possessiveness ; reader just fed up with everyone’s shit honestly ; and by everyone I mean the entire world, so no one’s off the shit list ;

✘ Word Count : 1.7k

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You had heard it, you had heard everything that everyone had said, you had pretended to be asleep the entire time… How could you have slept through all of their bickering and arguing in the first place? How had they assumed you would be able to sleep through it? You couldn’t deal with it back at the apartment, what made them think you’d be okay with it in the tiny, cramped ass van? They were all a bunch of idiots at this point, even the two that you were sitting in between in the back of the car because instead of just shutting it down or ignoring it entirely, they fed into the jealousy and bullshit of everyone else.

By now you just felt… numb. You were numb to the hell that felt like it was being placed all on your shoulders, you had been forced to carry the brunt of it all, and you were just getting tired. You were tired of crying, although the tears seemed to come no matter what, you were tired of arguing with them, you were tired of feeling anything but tired. It was too much to try to feel any other emotion, and quite honestly, you didn’t even want to.

The cabin that Heeseung had pulled up to would have been spooky if the rest of the world wasn’t just as horrifying. It was mid December and you knew that no one was going to go walking through the woods right now, so, as scary as it looked, it was safer than anywhere else.

“Come on.” Jake said, grabbing your hand and pulling you away from Sunoo, helping you out of the car and into the cabin. Even with everything that Heeseung had said, they didn’t get it, they’d never get it. You stopped caring, you let him drag you across the dead grassy land that crunched under the soles of your shoes from the frost that had formed on it. “It’s cold, we don’t have to wait for them, they’ll come in when they do.”

Did he think you were going to wait? Maybe he did. That’s what you would have done before your sanity flew out the window, you would have patiently waited for them to all pile out of the car, but now you didn’t care. You didn’t care to see them get out of the vehicle, you didn’t care for anything for that matter. Hell, you didn’t even care for yourself. The new you hadn’t just built a wall, you had built a barrier, it was impenetrable, no one would ever be able to get in, and you would never get out.

“Have you been crying?” He asked once you were inside the cabin, and although under normal circumstances, his question might have come across as genuine concern, but now, with them, with him… it just felt like he was trying to get one up on everyone else that had yet to make it into the cabin. You shook your head, your jaw set as you looked around at the dust covered furniture that looked to have been forgotten about long before the apocalypse. “I know it’s scary out there, you don’t have to worry, everything will be okay.” He reached out to wipe the stray tears, and you could barely even feel his touch on your frozen skin. You were sure that you looked as dead as you felt, and you were positive that he noticed considering the way his eyebrow arched and he hesitantly pulled his hand away. “Are you hungry?” He asked, looking at the men who were lugging in the bags of all the food they had been able to grab before evacuating the apartment.

“No.” Your voice was flat, your eyes were like glass, they were glossy but they held no life in them. It was almost scary to him to see you like this, so emotionless. He’d rather see you scared or something, because seeing you the way you are now was much more terrifying to him. “I’d like to go to sleep now.” You said robotically, nodding to him before turning on your heel to head towards one of the doors. You didn’t know what laid beyond them, and you truly didn’t care. You’d sleep on a cot in the middle of a blizzard if it meant you didn’t have to listen to them anymore.

“Wh-What? You just woke up. You slept the entire car ride here.” He stammered, reaching out to grab your wrist, and once again, you let him. What was the point of pulling away, what was the point of even making them feel an ounce of rejection? Surely they wouldn’t take the hint, or maybe they’d just blame each other even more and the fights would get worse. “You’re not getting ill, are you?” Was he actually worried or did the prospect of you actually becoming sick ruin his chances?

“No.” You repeated your one worded response once again, looking him straight in the eyes as you continued. “I’m just tired.” You didn’t have to explain to him, you owed him no reasoning, and with that, he reluctantly dropped your hand and let you walk off towards the bedroom, following your every move with worried eyes until you disappeared.

The other men filed in one by one, all of them looking around for you, who had been dragged out of the vehicle before Heeseung even had a chance to put it in park. “Where is she?” Jungwon asked, hating for a moment how big the cabin was in comparison to the apartment. There seemed to be a lot more places for you to run off in you wanted to, and not just that, but it was so deep in the woods, he didn’t want to think of what would happen if you ran away without them knowing.

“She went off into one of the rooms, she said she was tired.” Jake mumbled, getting the same confused look from everyone else who had been sure that you were sleeping the entire time in the car. “I think there’s something wrong with her though, she doesn’t-“

Sunghoon cut him off, pointing at the three doors that were on the other side of the large living/kitchen/dining room. “What room did she go in? What’s wrong with her? Let me go see her, I need to make sure she’s okay.” The words came out frenzied as if the mere thought of you being ill and by yourself was making him lose his mind, and maybe it was, but his reaction only further annoyed everyone else in the room.

“God, can you let anyone finish a sentence or do you just enjoy being an asshole?” Heeseung muttered to Sunghoon who looked slightly hurt at the comment, but Heeseung didn’t care, not at all, looking back to Jake instead. “Finish, and be quick about it.”

Jake shook his head, running a hand through his hair as his panicked eyes darted around the room. “I don’t know, she just seemed… not there. Like… her eyes were dead, it was scary. I haven’t seen her like this before. Not even at the beginning when everything was super fucked up, she didn’t look like that but now… I don’t know… I’m worried about her.” He trailed off, watching as all the guys' faces turned solemn, and maybe it was because internally they knew it was their fault that you had gotten like this, but none of them wanted to believe it, none of them wanted to think that they were the reason for your pain and suffering.

“Hmmm, I wonder who’s fault that could be?!” Nikis sudden outburst following the dead silence had all of them jumping, but he didn’t care, they had done enough damage as it is. “Oh that’s right! It’s all of you assholes who can’t seem to think of anyone else but your fucking selves! I swear to god if anything fucking happens to her, I’m killing all of you.” Surely he wouldn’t, they all knew he wouldn’t, but somewhere deep down, they knew that the threat was real, and while they all wouldn’t actually be dead, they’d be better off that way to him. “And for the love of whatever it is that you want to believe in… Leave her the hell alone. Can you do one thing right maybe? It would be a huge favor to everyone.” He stormed off into one of the rooms, thankfully not choosing the one that you were in, and as much as he probably wanted to slam the door behind him, he didn’t, out of respect for you and silence that you wanted.

“So who gets to sleep with her tonight?” Jake asked, immediately regretting his words once all the eyes in the room were back on him, astonished at the gull he had to even ask such a thing right now. In hindsight, it probably was a bad thing, but he was genuinely curious, and while his jealousy and what he thinks to be as slight possessiveness over you was fueling that curiosity, he felt like it was important to know. “What? I was just wondering.”

Heeseung shook his head, his expression growing more and more disgusted the longer he was around the guys. “Well stop. Stop wondering. Stop fucking trying, okay? You all have done enough, and if she still by some fucking chance wants someone to sleep beside her, then we’ll let her decide. But if she doesn’t… Well I wouldn’t blame her.” He shoved past Jake who stumbled at the push, having to catch himself on the side of one of the dusty couches.

He didn’t know what to say, and he didn’t know Heeseung seemed so agitated considering he liked you too. Maybe he wasn’t as pushy with it, but it was quite evident that the feelings were there. “You can say excuse me next time.” Jake mumbled, moving further into the living room but sticking to the opposite side that Heeseung was on. The oldest member scoffed, keeping his back turned and his attention on the random knick knacks that lined the old fireplace. “You know, you may be better at hiding your feelings right now, but in the end, you’ll end up more hurt than the rest of us… Remember that.” Jake said, loud enough for Heeseung to hear, watching the way he stiffened before turning around to look at him.

“Yeah? I doubt that… I don’t think any of us will hurt as much as she does once this is all over.”

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whatsk-poppinhomies · 2 years

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VI. sleeping arrangements

✘ Synopsis : it’s hard enough as it is trying to make sure you have enough resources for you and the men that you basically invited in. what’s harder is making sure they have a place to be comfortable in your tiny studio apartment.

✘ Pairing : ??? x F!Reader

✘ TW : awkwardness ; insomnia ; exhaustion ; fear ; attempts at comfort ;

✘ Word Count : 2.3k

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Sunoo and Niki stood beside you as they washed the dishes that had been made from dinner while the other guys sat in the living room talking about what to do next, as if they’d ever come to a solid agreement on what the next course of action would be. “You didn’t have to help with this…” You mumbled, grabbing the bowl that Niki had just finished rinsing. You had somehow become the designated drier of the dishes, a job that wasn’t as tedious or hard as actually scrubbing them, and you felt bad about the fact that they were guests in your home and they felt like they had to do the work.

“It’s the least we can do.” Niki responded back, and the lightness in his voice seemed almost like a dub considering the setting, like it wasn’t supposed to be like that, but he was young, and his mind seemed to find the positivity in everything, even though if he were to open up the blinds on the window he’d see the world in shambles. “Thank you for dinner, it was delicious.” He added, and Sunoo leaned around the maknae to smile at you, nodding in agreement.

It was probably the least stressful moment you’ve had all evening, but even still, the back of your mind was screaming that this wouldn’t last, you didn’t have enough to make it last, and sooner or later, once the food runs out, they’d have a reason to leave, they’d have a reason to abandon you and find somewhere or someone else to seek shelter with while you were left with nothing. That’s how the world works, once you have no more to give, you’re useless to people, you’re useless to everyone.

“Y/N…” Sunoos voice dragged you out of your thoughts, your head shaking as you apologetically smiled at him, grabbing the bowl that Niki was holding out towards you. “Are you okay?” It was a silly question to ask, at least in your mind it was. Were you okay? Absolutely not. Nothing was okay, and you were quite sure nothing would be okay again. You were far from the dictionary definition of the word okay, it felt like you were drowning and right when you thought you had found the chain to pull yourself above water, the chain ended up being nothing more than an anchor to pull you down further.

Of course at the end of the day, you were the one who had in fact grabbed the chain, so there was no one else to blame but yourself for the sinking. The best option was to let it carry you down deeper, to let the water fill your lungs and inevitably suffocate you until there was nothing left. It would be one less person to worry about, and better yet, you wouldn’t have to worry about anything either. Why go through the struggle of drowning and not let it take you then? Why would you want to be pulled to the surface just to feel the fiery burn of the water that you would have to cough up and the painful first breath of oxygen once you reached land again? Why subject yourself to more pain when you could just… get it over with?

You nodded quickly, forcing yourself to look as though you weren’t dying on the inside, having an internal conflict with yourself over what to do. You weren’t going to make them feel bad for accepting your offer. The only thing they had done was accept it. The world was ending, and if you by chance were to end along with it, the last thing you wanted people to think of you was that you were the type of person that lended a helping hand only to pull it back at the last minute. “I’m fine… Thank you for helping me.”

Dinner was the hardest part, or so it had seemed at that moment, but now that the kitchen was cleaned and the dishes were done, you took a look around your studio apartment and were hit with the realization that you not only needed to feed these men, but you were housing them as well. They all looked exhausted, rightfully so, and most of them were already dozing on the couch, their necks hung over the back cushions, their adams apples protruding from the angle they were in.

“Shit…” You mumbled to yourself, looking between the living room and your single bedroom that had one queen sized bed in it that surely wouldn’t fit them all. “Alright… uhm… fuck…” You didn’t know what to do. It would be rude to tell them that they all had to sleep on the floor, but what was there to actually do? You had one blow up mattress stored in the hallway closet that was used for when your sister had come to visit you, and you had enough blankets to build a fort, but that still didn’t mean that they’d all have a spot.

Sunghoon looked up from his spot on the couch, his eyebrows arched quizzically as he watched you argue with yourself, not knowing what exactly the reason was though. “You alright?” He asked, and you were sure that the question would never not sound crazy considering the times, but you were also sure that you’d at some point get used to being asked. You hadn’t lied to him when he first talked to you, and you weren’t going to lie to him now, shaking your head in response as you looked around the room once more. “What’s wrong?” He questioned, walking over to where you stood at the divider between the kitchen and the living room, trying to understand before you answered by looking at the same thing you were.

“I can’t… I can’t make you all sleep on the floor… That’s rude…” You murmured, looking up at him with eyes that already screamed apologies for the inevitable, but he simply snorted, shaking his head as he motioned his hand around the room. “My bed is-”

He cut you off, holding his finger up just in front of your lips but not actually touching them. “A floor is better than the ground outside. We’d appreciate anything, but you’re not giving up your bed to us. After everything, you at least deserve to sleep comfortably.” Were they always this nice, or did they just feel obligated because they were staying in your apartment? You didn’t really want to know the answer though, and it didn’t seem like what he had said would be up for discussion, so you nodded, leading him to the hallway closet to show him where the extra blankets and blowup mattress were. “I call the mattress though… No one else is awake enough, so I’ll take it.”

The attempts to lighten the mood weren’t for nothing, and you felt like you could really lighten up around him. It was as if when he was in your general area, it was like the world outside could be forgotten, all of your worries would wash away when he smiled at you. “It’s yours.” You whispered, passing the neatly folded bed into his open arms and then placing a blanket and air pump on top. You shouldn’t hold onto the happiness that he brought though, it was just as foolish as sending out the message in the first place. If things were to go back to normal, much like you hoped they would, the guys would all hop on the next available plane to go back to Korea and you’d be nothing more than a distant memory that they’d want to force into the back of their head. If things didn’t go back to normal, well, they’d surely leave once you were of no use to them. No matter who you are, no matter what your status, at the end, everyone is just a mammal, wanting nothing more than to survive in a world that is pinned against them.

Sunghoon attempted to quietly pump up the mattress as you set out the blankets across the floor, your living room resembling a slumber party now rather than a safe house. “Is that for us?” The soft voice of Jungwon had you lifting your head from the pillows that you were adjusting on the floor, and you sheepishly nodded, embarrassed at the lack of everything that you had. “I guess Sunghoon already called the mattress?” He glanced over at his hyung who was still in the process of inflating the bed, and you didn’t need to answer his question because Sunghoon mumbled out a quiet “It’s mine”. Jungwon chuckled softly, slipping off the couch and moving down to the floor, resting his head on the pillow that you had just finished fluffing, looking up at you from upside down. “It’s comfortable. I promise, everything that you’re doing… It means the world to us… I don’t know what we would have done without you…”

You hummed softly, pursing your lips as Jungwons eyes bore into your own. “I… It’s… You’re welcome.” Your voice broke at the end, the emotions that you had been trying to lock away for the entire day since they’ve been here were finally spilling over. You didn’t want them to see you break, you didn’t want them to see how weak you really were. “I’m gonna… I’m gonna go to bed now… Goodnight everyone…” You said quickly, catching a small glimpse of the look of worry on both Jungwons and Sunghoons face as you scurried out of the living room to hide in your own bedroom as the tears began to fall.

You had done the bare minimum in regards to helping them out. They were a group of millionaires that were now downgraded to sleeping on the floor in your apartment or, if they were lucky enough to call dibs early enough, a cheap blowup mattress that even your sister despised. You had done what any decent human would have done, basically sacrificing yourself in the process.

The hours passed, although you weren’t sure how many. You were in and out of sleep, tossing and turning as the nightmares filled your brain, although you knew that the source of the reason was right outside your window. Even in your subconscious you could hear the sounds of the falling city, and they’d seep in through the cracks and crevices of the pleasant dream that you were trying to have to make up for the horrors that were the real world. You couldn’t escape it, maybe no one could, not even in your dreams.

“Y/N…?” A quiet voice emanated from the bedroom door, a faint light creeping in from the small crack that had been made, and a dark shadow stood in the middle of that crack, although you couldn’t make out just who it was. “Do you need anything?” The figure moved further into your room, shutting the door quietly behind them.

You weren’t sure why you didn’t react, maybe you were hoping for the worst so that you could just end the living nightmare that you were in, or maybe you were just frozen into shock from the sudden man that now stood in the center of your bedroom. “I’m… no… It’s alright…” You stammered out, really staring at the figure now as your eyes began to adjust to the darkness. “Jungwon…?” You questioned, and a soft hum of agreement came from the figure that you now knew the identity of as it moved closer to the edge of your bed. “Is the floor uncomfortable? We can switch… I’ll lay on the floor…”

He snorted softly, sitting down next to your feet, the silhouette of his fingers drumming on his lap awkwardly as he shook his head. “The bed you made for us is fine. I heard you tossing… I wanted to make sure you were okay.” He stated, letting out a soft sigh. “You’ve done so much, the least I can do is make sure you’re okay.”

For some reason his words hit you, struck a nerve that had you sniffling softly, and you didn’t know what you were expecting him to do in response to your quiet sobs, but his hand reached out to wipe the tears that had already begun to fall. “I don’t have enough… I… I’m sorry…” It was vague, but he didn’t push you to elaborate, simply shushing you like a parent would to soothe a crying child.

“You’re enough… What you’ve done is more than enough…” He practically cooed, situating himself on the bed to get more comfortable as he leaned in closer, his fingers continuing to wipe away the tears. “You’ve done more than anyone else would, and I… We’re going to make sure to keep you safe… We’re going to be okay.” It was too late to argue him on it, and even though your mind was screaming that he was wrong, you were exhausted, you were tired, and you wanted his words to bring you some sense of comfort to at least get you through the night, so you tried not to think too hard about how wrong he was, nodding in agreement as you brought your hand up to place over his. “Try to get some sleep now… ‘Kay?”

His thumbs smoothed over your cheek a few more times before your hand dropped down to your side and he pushed himself up off the bed, tiptoeing back to the door, trying his best not to wake up the six other men in the next room. “Jungwon…” You whispered his name, causing him to pause in front of the door to look back at you. “Can you keep the door cracked… just a little bit?”

A soft sigh left him as you watched his shadow nod before he walked out of the room, slowly closing the door before stopping when a small sliver of light was still cast inside your room. “Goodnight, Y/N… We’ll see you in the morning.”

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whatsk-poppinhomies · 2 years

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XVII. sweetest perfection

✘ Synopsis : He knew that they were all taking turns helping you fall asleep. He knew that there was nothing to be jealous about. He knew that is was foolish to feel the way he was when the world was going to shit around him. He knew a lot of things, but watching Jay walk out of your bedroom with his arm wrapped around your waist made him feel like he was losing his mind and losing something that he never had in the first place.

✘ Pairing : ??? x F!Reader

✘ TW : jealousy ; signs of possessiveness ; verbal fighting ; arguing ; reader doubting herself again ; Niki to the rescue ;

✘ Word Count : 1.9k

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Stupid. It was so stupid the way he felt when he watched you walk into the bedroom with Jay. The tight feeling in his stomach that made him want to vomit, the dizziness in his head, the clouds that shadowed over him and made the room feel twenty times darker than it really was. It didn’t mean anything, he knew that it didn’t, you were completely oblivious to the feelings that the men had for you, it’s not like you were hopping into bed with Jay to do anything but sleep, but the thought of another man laying beside you had him furious.

You were innocent, too innocent for your own good to notice that they all were fighting for your attention, you seemed absolutely clueless which had Jake questioning how in the hell you were able to know the world was about to end but you couldn’t tell that they were all pining over you. It was bullshit, and Jake felt like he was at the bottom of the totem pole of your affections.

Sure you had patched him up and you made sure he was okay, but that was all he seemed to get. Why was everyone else more worthy of your time than he was? What made them so special? And where the hell had Jay come from to be able to sweep in at the last minute and get first dibs to sleep beside you? What the hell had he done to deserve it? If Jake could remember correctly, Jay hadn’t even wanted to stay here, Jay didn’t seem to give a single shit about you, but now he was cozied up beside you no doubt reveling in the feeling of you beside him.

Did Jay know that what he had done pissed everyone off? He probably did, that’s why he was so quick to pull you away from the living room and the rest of the guys who were left even more pissed off than they had been when they had first heard that it was him you were going to sleep next to. It didn’t make it any better that Heeseung had gotten to sleep with you the night before, in the bathtub of all places, and now you just seemed to be moving through all of them. You didn’t know what you were doing though, he couldn’t exactly blame you for making him jealous, but he could see that some of the guys seemed to enjoy it.

The next morning, Jake couldn’t help but jump at the sound of your bedroom door being opened, the soft squeak of the knob being turned. It wouldn’t have woken him up before, but now he had become attuned to it, almost like his body was waiting for someone to come out of that door, although he wasn’t sure what for.

Jay had his arm wrapped around your waist, something that didn’t seem to phase you as much as it would anyone else, but it wasn’t just that, his shirt was off as well, and Jake felt like he was going to be physically sick. Is that really how he had slept? Had he stripped any other article of clothing and just made sure to put it on before exiting the room? Did you mind it, were you too nervous to tell him to put the shirt back on? Jay had crossed a line that Jake hadn’t even known was there.

“Take your time, dear… The guys all seem to be sleeping still.” Jay said as you walked into the kitchen. You must have said something quietly, but Jake assumed it was about breakfast considering the sounds of pots and pans being rattled in the kitchen. What really had Jake ticked though was the stupid term of endearment that Jay seemed to use with you, as if there was something special that happened that made Jay think that he could call you names like that. It was ridiculous. He didn’t even want to be here, he didn’t care about you, the only thing he cared about was himself, yet he was dropping a pet name like you were his own.

Jays lips pecked your temple before he went into the bathroom and Jake took that as his chance to get up, kicking his blankets off a little too violently, pulling a muscle in his side that was still weak from the wound he had endured from the first scavenge. He groaned quietly, but you heard the sound clearly, dropping what you were doing and running over to attend to him. “You okay?” You murmured, grabbing his hand and holding it tightly to try to help him up, although he knew that if he had used his full weight against you it would have dropped you down on top of him. Now that he thought about it though, it didn’t seem like such a bad idea.

“Yeah, I’m fine. I think I just tried to get up too fast.” He lied, giving you a smile to which you mirrored in return. “Did you sleep well last night?” He asked, trying not to sound like he was fishing for information even though that’s exactly what he was doing. You nodded quickly, and you didn’t seem to get flustered or nervous or even embarrassed, so that had to mean that you and Jay didn’t do anything, right? He hated the idea of Jay being able to get with you in that way, he knew that Jay didn’t deserve you like that.

“Here, come on up. You can sit at the table and have some tea with me while breakfast is cooking.” You said, helping to pull him up and walking with him into the kitchen, his hand never leaving yours even after he was already standing. “The guys seem to be sleeping so well, I don’t want to wake them with our talking.” So innocent, you really were. He was sure that a majority of them were already awake, they were just pretending to still be asleep so you wouldn’t think they were nosy.

You placed three cups out on the table and laid out the boxes of tea bags for him to choose from, just like you had done with Niki, except that time things seemed much easier. You weren’t sure why the air felt so thick, but it was like your airways were being cut off or like you forgot how to breathe. “Oh, look who’s awake.” Jay said as he walked out of the bathroom, a certain smugness in his tone that you picked up on immediately which made you shoot him a look. “Did you wake them all up for breakfast or is it just him?”

“He woke up himself.” You said, filling the kettle with water and placing it on the stove. “Pick your tea while the water boils, I’ll be right back.” They both nodded to you, smiling after you although the smiles didn’t seem genuine, but you didn’t think to worry about it too much assuming that they were just groggy from waking up.

As soon as you were out of the room, Jake pushed himself up, leaning over the table to get in Jays face. “You think you can just sleep with her shirtless, like you didn’t make her feel like shit the first two weeks you were here. You made her think that she was inadequate, that what she gave us wasn’t good enough and now you’re waltzing around calling her dear. You’ve got a lot of fucking nerve.” Jake hissed, but the smug smile that Jay wore in response had Jake fuming, and if this were a cartoon there would be steam blowing out of his ears.

“Don’t talk to me like you’re any better. All of the guys have at least tried with her, you were too busy sitting on the couch moping.” Jay retorted, pulling a teabag from the box and placing it in his cup. “Some people just take a little longer to accept their feelings for someone, you know? I’m not like Sunghoon or Jungwon that pounced on her like a dog in heat, I like to take my time.”

Jakes fingers balled up into fists, his entire body trembling with the anger that he was trying so hard not to let out. “You don’t get to have her.” His words were like venom as he spat them through his clenched teeth, sitting back in his chair but his legs bounced in an attempt to contain his rage.

Jay only chuckled in response, the sound was too cocky, arrogant even, and he leaned back with his arms folded behind his head as if this conversation was nothing less than amusing to him. “Oh really? And why not? Is she yours, because the last time I checked, she’s not anyones. We’re all fighting for the same thing here, aren’t we? Better step up your game.”

The growl that built in Jakes throat was muffled out by the screaming tea kettle on the stove, and then your door flew open with you running out in a new pair of sweatpants and a hoodie that seemed far too big. “Sorry, I got a little pancake mix on my other jacket…” You said, cutting yourself off when you walked into the room and became suffocated once again by the tense cloud that surrounded the guys at the table. “Uhm… did you pick your tea?” You asked, trying to make it seem like the sudden mood change had gone unnoticed, and they both said a quick yes in response. “Is everything okay?” You whispered, keeping your back to them, scared that if you turned around they’d be glaring at you.

“Everything is just fine, dear. Don’t worry.” Jay murmured, his tone sickeningly sweet, and you weren’t sure why he was talking to you like that when he hadn’t done it last night or any time before. Maybe he was just doing it because you seemed nervous and he was trying to calm you down, unaware that it was only making you more uneasy.

Jake got up from his chair, walking over to stand beside you at the counter. “I can help you make the pancakes if you’d like. I know how to make them extra fluffy.” At least he seemed normal, well, normal enough. “I’ll show you how, it’s really easy.” You nodded to him, watching as he poured some of the mix into the bowl that you had set out, but you could still feel the eyes of Jay burning into your back.

“I’ll go wake up the guys.” He mumbled, his chair being moved back a little too violently as he walked into the living room, and you could feel the air growing thicker and thicker with each passing second.

You weren’t even sure what was going on, you didn’t know what you could have possibly done to piss him off, at least that’s the way it looked, and as if Jay could hear your worried thoughts, he moved to stand behind you, his arms practically caging you in as he poured some of the mix onto the skillet. “Don’t worry, he’s always grumpy in the morning.” He whispered, nuzzling his nose against the top of your head.

The aura of your apartment had changed drastically, and the boys that you had just begun to feel the most comfortable around, now had you wanting to run away and hide in your bedroom. You weren’t sure what had changed. Was it you, or was it them? It just didn’t make sense. They all seemed to like you and hate you at the same time, and the brotherly type bond that you had seen between the seven of them in videos… Was it breaking, or had it all been fake to begin with?

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whatsk-poppinhomies · 2 years

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XXVI. leave in silence

✘ Synopsis : this wasn’t what you had planned for, you hadn’t planned for this at all. your need to feel some kind of emotion had turned into a shit show, and now all of the guys were involved trying to calm things down. sneaking away would have been terrifying if you had been anywhere else, but in the seclusion of the forest with its hollowed trees, you knew you’d find some sense of solitude in the silence, that is, until you heard the footsteps and broken twigs, and then the saw the shy smile of Jungwon as he stepped out from behind a trunk.

✘ Pairing : ??? x F!Reader

✘ TW : arguments ; fighting (verbal and almost physical) ; reader disassociation ; run-away reader ; kind of awkward ; nervousness ; that weird feeling that you get when you’re like… happy that someone’s with you but also you kind of wanted to be alone but not really?? ; everyone back at the cabin is going to be panicking but not in this chapter ; Jungwon redemption arc maybe??? ;

✘ Word Count : 1.8k

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Loneliness, solitude, the two words were supposed to carry silence with them, but even with the guys outside of your room, you could still hear them arguing. It was never ending, and not even your pillow being wrapped around your ears could drown out their voices. Were they being loud on purpose or were things just getting that volatile?

Why were you even there anymore? They obviously didn’t care about you enough to cut it out, and it seemed like they were just sticking around to upset you more. Instead of it being who could get with you first, it felt more like who could get rid of you first. It wasn’t just one person though, it was a group effort, they were all contributing to the way that you felt.

“I can’t believe you would just come in like that! And you knew! You knew and you still came in! You have no fucking respect!” Heeseung was still shouting once they had left the room, and while you had once found comfort in his voice, now it just drove you nuts. They all did. Maybe they weren’t losing their minds, maybe it was you.

“I have no respect…” Sunghoon repeated, as if he were pondering the words, but his voice didn’t stay quiet for long, suddenly rising in pitch and volume. “You motherfucker, you have no respect at all for any of us! After everything that you know, you still slept with her! Talking about how we should just leave her alone and then you decide to fuck her the first chance you get!”

They were talking about you like you weren’t in hearing distance, like you weren’t in the cabin at all. It was your decision to make, yet they still were fighting about it. They fought about everything that even remotely pertained to you. It was old, it was tiring, it was exhausting.

You got up out of the bed, getting dressed and pulling on one of the old dusty coats that hung in the wardrobe in the corner of the room. You didn’t know who’s it was, but your arms weren’t long enough to reach the bottom of the sleeves. Whoever it was, they were tall, but the extra fabric of the coat was warm and even with all the men in the cabin right now, you felt more safe than ever in the coat of a stranger.

There was a balcony door in your room, the perfect escape, and while you didn’t know where you were going, you knew you needed to go somewhere. You pulled on your shoes and stepped outside, breathing in the air that stung your lungs. It was so cold, but it felt nice to finally feel like you could breathe, the air in the cabin felt so tight, so constricting, you couldn’t even take a deep breath.

The ground was frozen causing it to crunch and crack beneath your feet, the first snow hadn’t even fallen yet, but everything was covered in a frost that made everything look like ice. It was beautiful, you hadn’t been able to appreciate the true beauty of nature in so long, and now that you were out in it, you wanted to take it all in.

You could live out here, truly you could, if things were alright, if things ever went back to normal, you’d want to live in the forest, in the seclusion of the woods, not having to worry about anything or anyone. The deeper you walked, the thicker the cover of the trees became, building what felt like a tent around you and over top of you. Even without the leaves, the thick branches tangled with each other and filtered the sunlight out so it only came through in small slivers, lighting up patches of the path that you were walking through, a path that had been abandoned and filled with brush for a while now.

Your legs began to get tired the more you walked, your lungs burning from the chilled air you were breathing in, and you let out a smoke clouded sigh of relief when you found a fallen tree trunk, taking a seat on it and catching your breath.

There were hand warmers in the pockets, but the warmth had long since been used up, now only feeling to two tiny bean bags that you pulled out and tossed around for a bit before the sound of breaking branches echoed through the closed in woods, the feeling of being watched having you on edge.

If this were a horror movie, the director would have you calling out a hello, but this was real life, and the scripted line was nowhere to be found on your frozen, chapped lips. What you really wanted to do was crawl into the hole at the end of the trunk and hide from whoever it was that was there.

A tuft of smoke bellowed out not too far away, someone was breathing and that someone was close, just lingering behind one of the trees that was so close it might as well have been beside you. If it were a stranger, if it were someone with bad intentions… would it really be that bad though?

Your fear subsided as quickly as it had come, now being replaced with a feeling of relief. It was the kind of relief that came with an ending, knowing that soon things would be over. You wouldn’t have to run anymore, you wouldn’t have to worry, you’d just be… gone. How relaxing it would be to not have to deal with the stress of being wanted by six men who had all gone bat shit crazy over you.

“Hey…” The voice whispered, and you turned in the direction of it, seeing Jungwons dimpled smile as he popped out from around one of the trunks. “You slipped away too?” He murmured, stepping out from behind the tree and walking over to where you sat to sit beside you. He wasn’t who you wanted to see, you truthfully didn’t want to see any of them, but if you had to see one, you would have much rather it be Niki.

“Yup…” You mumbled, not holding eye contact with him any longer than you had to. “Why are you here?” It seemed like a good place to start, especially since you didn’t want anyone else here, the last thing you needed was for them to have followed him out to where you were.

He shrugged, crossing his legs up on the trunk and staring up at the little bit of light that was coming through. “They’re still fighting… I left just as Sunghoon lunged at Heeseung and… I’m just tired of it.” You snorted, finding it humorous that he was tired of it when you had dealt with it the most, when it was all regarding you. “I know you are too… I’m sure you’ve had more than enough of all of us… that’s why you’re out here.” You nodded in agreement and he sighed softly, drumming his hands on his knees as he waited for a response that would never come. “Are you still mad at me… about the kiss…?”

He sounded so nervous, it was almost comical, and if you had the ability to actually laugh right now you would have, but instead you shook your head. “I’m over it, Wonnie. I’m not mad at you, I’m not mad at anyone, I’m just… I’m over it.” You had answered all of the questions that he could have asked you, so now it was just silent, awkwardly silent, the only sound was the faint twittering of squirrels and other animals that had found homes once again in the lands that wouldn’t be touched.

“I know that you’re… over it… but I just wanted you to know that I’m sorry for making you feel like… like it didn’t mean anything or… I was just nervous, I was scared.” He explained, and you nodded your head again, refusing to look at him, but you could tell her was holding his breath, the harsh sound of his exhale hadn’t been heard, he was waiting for you to say something.

“I know… You said so in the car, that’s why I’m over it. I’m not mad.” You said nonchalantly, shrugging your shoulders as you fiddled with the lint and dust buildup of the coat pockets. Maybe they had been moth balls that had disintegrated into nothing as the coat sat untouched in the wardrobe.

Jungwons mouth hung open as he stared at you, you could feel it, his eyes burning into your back, the heat a stark contrast to the cold that enveloped you. “You were awake… you were awake?” He questioned, and you nodded once again, finding some sense of enjoyment in the way his pitch raised, his nervousness evident. “So you heard… everything?”

You hummed in agreement, finally turning to look at him, seeing the way his eyes wavered, as if he was trying not to look at you even though he really wanted to. “I heard everything, and I heard everyone. I think it’s funny that you thought I’d reject you though… you know, for a while you were my favorite.” The soft gasp that left him had a small puff of smoke forming, but he didn’t say anything. “I wouldn’t have rejected you though, I was just caught off guard.”

He sat slack jawed for a bit, but he quickly snapped his mouth shut, running a hand through his hair as he shook his head. “I’m stupid, I’m so stupid, aren’t I?” You nodded your head in agreement, casually twirling the extra length of your sleeve, watching it closely as if it were putting you in a trance. “You know… I don’t care for what you did with Heeseung, I really don’t.” He started, and you suddenly started to hate the fact that he had found you once again. Just when you thought that things would be normal, like you’d have a normal conversation with him, he had to bring up what was going on in the house. “You don’t have to talk about it, we don’t have to talk about it… I just want you to know that it’s okay, and I understand. I’m not mad, and I still like you… a lot… so…”

You sighed heavily, pursing your lips as you stared forward, trying to find hidden shapes in the tangled branches in the distance, but the silence was awkward and you felt the need to fill it. It would have been much better if you were there by yourself, but a part of you was happy that you had been found. It was strange. You hated it. “Thanks… it’s getting cold… we should go back.” You murmured, pushing yourself up off nature's seat and waiting for him to follow suit. “Oh, and Wonnie…” You whispered, turning around to see that his eyes were on you, listening intently. “Don’t tell anyone where I went… This can just be… Our spot…”

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