#dr. franken stein | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

tokoyamisstuff · 2 years

Text

Franken Stein / Reader: lucent (adj.) - softly bright or radiant

...in which you take care of him.

Warnings: Slight Angst, Dark Thoughts, Self-Loathing -Neglect and -Harm, Mentions of Mental Illness and Past Abuse, Blood Noteable: GN! Reader, Weapon! Reader, Hurt/Comfort, Made Up Background Story Words: ~4200

"Don't tell me you've been brooding around in the darkness all day!"

What a self-explanatory question, on second thought. Same procedure as every time.

Stein's lack of response made you sigh, a loud bang echoing through the wide room as you put down several bags on the nearest table. You flipped the lightswitch, however he seemed to be buried so deeply inside of whatever he was currently obsessing over that not even the bright lamps of the laboratory could bring him down to earth again.

The man itself was mutely sitting backwards on his rolling chair, his chin resting on the backrest being the only thing keeping him from collapsing right then and there.

"Hey there, Stein..." Your voice was barely above a whisper when you approached him, reluctantly waving a hand in front of his face to get him to notice you. "I'm back from shopping. Also brought the samples you wanted."

In that state it was never a good idea to startle him, so you were always hesistant to touch the prof in any way. Even being a death scythe yourself, god knows even one sole hit of his soul wavelenghts could send you flying through the wall. You had your own fair share of pain over the years, but you'd obviously avoid it if possible.

"Oh?" Finally, Stein managed to tear his eyes away from the screen he's been glued on for hours. "Welcome home."

The word 'home' made a small smile tug on your lips which he'd immediately mirror, but you knew him better than that. For a man known to be absent of most emotions, he had perfected the art of showing off completely normal expressions. His appearance was already enough to unsettle most people interacting with him, after all.

Behind that facade, however, his feelings had just dampened down to an amount he could not express properly - so you'd always fear what silent turmoil would be going on on the inside.

His eyes gave it away, how part of him still seemed to be far away from reality, and the dark circles underlining his lids painfully showed you the extend of his exhaustion.

You highly doubted that those past hours of your absence were even remotely productive if anything. It wasn't the first time during those many, many years that you had seen him like this - staring at a vast nothingness while trapped inside his own mind.

Franken was a man whose interest, let alone joy, could only rarely be evoked by anything else than this science only he himself could make sense of. Though he was a highly intelligent man - or maybe precisely because of it - he was very well aware of his own sensitivity to madness.

And on certain times, it was extraordinarily hard to keep in check.

"Come" you cooed, slightly rubbing circles on his back before taking ahold of his wrist. "I've already run you a bath. Gonna make us dinner in the meantime."

You just knew he hasn't spend a single second of the day worrying about his own well-being - but hey, that's what you are there for after all.

Sometimes Stein seemed like a literal zombie, at least one would question if he was actually alive when they could see him like this empty shell of a man. Wordlessly, he rose from his seat and let you drag him through the hallway, his huge silhouette following you closely.

As he watched you cheerfully tiptoe through this literal horror house, even humming a little melody, the thick haze laying heavy on his mind would finally lift.

Yes, having you around was certainly beneficial in some ways. At the beginning he would've never thought it possible, but you were able to remind him of that crucial fact time and time again.

Of course you were annoyingly naive and intrusive at times, but useful nonetheless. Helping him remember all those bothersome needs his body naturally has, for example. Stein tend to forget himself in his work more often than not, and that could become problematic for his progress.

How could one get proper research done if they for example simply forgot to sleep for several days? Certainly not useful for proper function of one's brain.

On particular bad days, he'd ignore all the signs his body was desperately showing until he'd eventually pass out - but you on the other hand were aware of every little hint his otherwise shut down physique was giving.

And even if he still thought selfcare to be a waste of time, you had the talent to make it somewhat bearable.

"You really need to stop smoking" you almost mocked, sheepishly trying to distract yourself from staring at the man that undressed himself in front of you just like that. "Your clothes smell like a damn ashtray."

"Mhh..." was all you got for an answer, but you didn't mind. It wasn't like you and Stein ever needed words to understand each other either way, so when he sank down into the bathtub you reluctantly you decided to give him some space.

Without you being close Franken would begin to zone out again, rigidly sitting in the hot water that was doing nothing to help him feel human again. His aimless eyes wandered through the room, catching shady silhouettes here and there, proof of his mind playing tricks on him.

"By the way" he heared you call out for him behind the half-opened door, and your voice was so soothing he both wanted it on tape and to cut out your vocal cords for examination. "Getting those samples wasn't particulary easy. You need to pay me better for those missions!"

"I'm not paying you at all..." It was the first full sentence that left his lips this evening, and while it's meaning may be unimportant it did not fail to make you laugh. "Yeah, well maybe that's the problem!"

Not even a real conversation later you had quickly prepared the ingredients so you could leave them cooking by itself, while checking on your troublesome partner in the meantime.

"You sure are a piece of work..." you muttered under your breath as you found him in front of a broken mirror, blood running down his knuckles. Your heart sank into your stomach at the forlorn soul in front of you, his eyes fixated in a dark corner of the ceiling. "So it's that bad again, huh?"

Stein could only do so much as nod in shame, face stoic and wiped clean from any emotion. Immediately you grabbed a towel and began rubbing the drippingly wet man, then handing him a pile of fresh clothes as if his current state wasn't the most disturbing view.

Well, you were more than used to it - and glad to help every single time.

You could've sworn to earn an apologetic look from Stein as he calmly watched you removed the splinters from his skin, finishing with a clean bandage. Not even the disinfectant would have him flinch, and you heared the doc scold you about worrying too much and that this wound was nothing.

Yeah, you knew very well that he was used to way worse.

So many times you had stopped him from losing himself completely, kept him from doing something he might regret later and defended him through everything you failed to prevent.

Many would be concerned for your safety, thought you to be a victim trapped by a manipulative mastermind. No one could possibly understand why someone as kind and righteous as you could stay with a literal monster like Franken Stein, but that was simply not how you saw him.

Having witnessed a great deal of his childhood was more than enough to see the man in a completely different light. How the things that had happened to Stein have shaped and distorted him so much that it had left that huge of an impact even in the present. It was also most likely the reason why while he exceled in many ways, other most basic things he had failed to mature in at all.

Both you and Stein were caught up together since even before both of you had developed a proper conscience, not even remembering what your old homes had been like - that's just how young the two of you had been when you were abducted from your respective homes.

Many talented children, both weapons and potential meisters had been torn out of their families back then to serve cruel research purposes...

...however asides from you and Stein none of the others had survived that year-long torment.

And you owed the fact that you were still alive and able to live a somewhat normal life to him alone: A boy just as young and innocent as you, who you had never met until a cruel fate had put you in this hell together.

And what he did for your sake you would never be able to make up for.

Most of the extraordinary cruel procedures he would volunteer for whenever possible just so you would be spared, leaving you feeling both eternally grateful and with a deep guilt.

As months had turned into years in this nightmarish facility, the agonizing pain they drilled into this young boy's mind and body slowly but steadily changed him. Stein's conscience and emotions seemed to have vanished almost completely, being replaced with an insane hostility towards everything and everyone but you.

They had tainted his innocent soul, and so you ultimatively had to endure seeing the only good thing in your terrible life being altered beyond recognition.

And when both of you were freed, his mind was already completely broken.

Some might say that this debt is what's driving you to stay at his side all this time, but there's more to it - something good and bright and hopeful, and you wanted to try and share it with him until this day and beyond.

Because despite all his past wrongdoings, you were able to see the huge progress he made over the years, that much you could proudly claim.

Franken Stein was not beyond help, that much you wholeheartedly wanted to believe.

"Can you-" Stein's voice cracked before he could finish his request, feeling as if the burden of madness constantly creeping to poison his mind was crushing him fully.

Your hand was already on his sternum as he spoke, his muscles tensing as you hovered above the place that covered the strained heart you still knew he possessed. "Yeah, of course."

A deep, relieved breath escaped his lungs as you channeled your soul's wavelenghts to match his, entering his mind and body with ease. Stein would finally relax, shoulders slacking and goosebumps raising under your tender caress.

Those soulwaves of yours felt like a warm embrace, encoating him completely as if to shield him from everything...including himself. Madness might forever be lurking somewhere in a deep, dark corner of his mind - but thanks to you, it would always be damned to be pushed back, never to break through.

Sometimes, even though part of him felt remorse for depending on you so muc, he thought like this feeling was the way it should be for him. As if you were made for him and him only. And in a certain way, it was true. Those people altering you so brutally back then had succeeded in doing so.

The perfect weapon for the most powerful master.

"Thank you" Stein spoke in an unusual cheerful tone, turning onto the large screw in his head like he always would to rearrange his thoughts. "I'm feeling way better already."

"Glad to hear that" you responded softly, your hand subconsciously finding it's way to his cheek. "How about we eat now?"

"Sorry, not hungry." Oh, you wanted to punch some rason into him for that statement, to scold him about the importance of nourishing his body and all the work you put into cooking...

...but instead you were rewarded with Stein firmly putting his arms around you.

The tall man's head rested on yours, silently indulging in the moment for a while with no intention to let you go again. "What would I do without you, Y/N?"

"Wha- you..." Flabbergasted, you found yourself unable to string words together, trying to object to no avail.

"I think I've stressed you out more than enough tonight" Stein declared gratefully before daring to peck a ghostly kiss into your hair, the spark in his eyes you had missed all night having returned - that alone was more than rewarding for you.

"You're never bothering me, Franky." You pouted at the accusation, the fact that this man never learns to accept it. "I like being with you. I like you!"

"So much you're forgetting to think of yourself sometimes." Franky snorted at the nickname, squeezing your shoulders ever so slightly. "Get some rest now. I'll clean up your mess in the kitchen, okay?"

"Talking as if you were not all helpless before" you mocked him, poking his chest. "Alright, but only if you promise to lie down afterwards as well!"

Stein rose his arms in defense, smirking cheekily though he knew better than to argue with his metaphorical caretaker. "If you insist."

Taking care of Stein was one of the more easier tasks in your opinion, might not even be real work to you. After all, you cherished spending your time with him, no matter in what way.

But damn, the man just knew how to push your buttons!

As soon as he'd feel like himself again, he always tended to become all dominant and smug, in huge contrast to his usual lost puppy self.

Almost like he had two faces, and you didn't know which one of them was the actual healthy one. Both had their concerning qualities...

...yet it was nothing compared to the few occasions you had to see the true extend of his madness, shall it devour him.

On your way to the bedroom the sensation of your heart hammering against your chest would not falter in the slightest. That brief hug had brought your blood to a boil, making you feel like your complete body was on fire.

Sometimes you wondered if Stein was simply messing with you, or if you might only be imagining things. Hard to tell while being completely oblivious about the depht of your own feelings as well.

And even though you knew his affection for you to be genuine, his complicated character together with his confusing manners made his actions ambiguous most of the time.

Still, after everything he had done for you already you never doubted how far his feelings for you would reach. Stein could be sweet and caring if he wanted to, and also oddly domestic.

Analysing the composition of your relationship didn't matter, though. You were content with how things were between the two of you, right?

It was already pitch black outside when you crawled into bed, eyes clinging to the stars as the only light source. Your mind was racing with questions you had asked yourself many times already, though you knew they would lead to unfullfilling dead ends.

Sleeping was an especially hard exercise for your traumatized self to perform, for nightmares surely weren't shaken off easily even after all the time that had passed.

Sometimes you wondered how you were able to live in this laboratory where simply everything would so painfully remind you of all you've been through.

The solution to all of this was easy of course, the answer was always him.

Only Stein was able to make you overcome your fears, his presence alone banishing the memories haunting you away. To you, he was somewhat of a tragic hero, even though he had become the very thing that had tormented you all your childhood: A ruthless scientist and immorale sadist at that.

Yet he had sworn to protect you and never even once broke that oath. Gave you a home you would always gladly return to, thus alone erasing all those plaqueing fractions of your past, replacing it with memories to hold dear.

Giving up on him was no option. No matter what anyone else might think, not even Stein himself could stop you from seeing the good in him. You'd always have faith in him finding his way - and no matter what path he might choose, you would follow.

Maybe you'd have sweet dreams for a change, you thought as the last thing present in your exhausted mind was the image of Stein's thankful smile towards you, hugging the sheets as you soundly drifted into a sweet slumber.

Several hours later and in a whole other room however, the professor was still desperately unable to find any rest.

It was a fight that would never stop to continue: An eternal battle with madness about who's gonna prevail over his soul. He tossed and turned, sheets feeling like sandpaper on his skin in contrast to the remembrance of your silky touch.

Your scent, the gentle waves your soul was radiating were simply everywhere....and it was driving him crazier than madness ever could, pulling on every last of his nerve strings.

Actually, Stein knew what to do to find relief. It was so simple yet also so much more harder than anything he had ever done.

Obtaining it was impossible. An equation not meant to be solved.

Not even a sociopathic freak like himself could deny it any longer, how his heart was yearning for you - breaching whenever you were out of his reach, only to lead insanity through the cracks.

Why weren't you able to see the abomination everyone else does? Why pity a man who has drifted as far away from a victim as one could be? He was mutilated and instable, a constant burden and threat to anyone around him - especially you.

Stein was giving it his utmost to fill the emptiness of this unrequited love with his research, though not even that would be able to keep his madness in check anymore.

For your sake, he was always trying to become a better man. A dream never to come true, for he could not get out of his own skin.

Having you around was already more than enough, a privilege he stopped deserving a long time ago.

It would be selfish to demand more.

"Huh?"

As soon as he was able to focus again, Stein found himself in the middle of your room. Apparently the delusional part of him had taken advantage and rushed towards you before he even realized.

Gladly, at least you haven't woken up to notice him yet.

He cursed internally, fists clenching as he tried to leave instead of giving in to the inevitable pull he felt towards you. Fighting the urge to soothe that ache he had sucessfully suppressed for so long already.

Easier said than done, for he wasn't alone in his own head...so many voices and they were all screaming your name.

Stein was rooted on spot as his glare bored holes into you, fingernails digging deep enough into his own flesh to draw blood as he watched your chest slightly have with every breath. You looked magnificent even while sleeping, like a piece of art that wasn't meant to be tainted by touch. Your soul, he could perceive it as clearly as daylight and it was just as bright.

But as much adoration as he held for you, there were always two sides of a coin.

More often than not he felt a dark envy for being able to preserve your humanity even through everything. He believed you to be stronger than him, knew himself to be lacking something from the very start - maybe ever since he was born.

Or maybe you were possessing a unique trait, something that made you different in the way you could pull even someone as wicked as him towards the light.

Vivid scenarios began flashing in front of his inner eye, tempting him to still his curiosity by force.

Of course, that was what he had always been. Deep down he was a beast, and you knew it - that's what they had turned him into. A homicidal maniac.

The fact that you were always there for him despite the risks could only mean you wouldn't mind if he eventually fulfilled his desire like you had seen so many times before, or doesn't it?

It could only be that way. You want him to hurt you, maybe die by his hands even.

Yes, the narcotic would be quickly prepared, and then he would dissect his obsession with you away. If he could only to find out what makes you so special, then he could finally erase and overcome this weak spot for you.

Stein's eyes widened as you turned around at that moment, feeling caught in the act even though you were still soundly asleep. He was rooted on spot, eyes fixated on the huge unsighty scar on your left abdomen you had revealed as you kicked away the blanket.

In opposite to his initial plan, his insides churned at the sight. The remembrance of the scar's origin made his heart drop to his stomach, as if to be burned by black bile.

Due to his rather disturbing hobbies he was used to see massive amounts of blood without it evoking any emotional reaction, and more often than not he was being the one responsible for it in the first place....

...but the memory of your bleeding out self lying in his arms made him feel sick to the core.

You had been severly injured after a fight back when both of you had been pupils at DWMA - all because you had tried shielding him with your own body. Even in his adolescence the young man had already primed in his knowledge about the human body, so closing a wound like this was nothing to him...

...and yet he didn't.

Smart girl, he thought and though he was not one to cry easily, his eyes started to water for the first time in what felt like decades. You had hidden that scar away from him intentionally, fearing what would become out of him if he was to remember.

A faint scream echoed in his head, mixing together with his own crazy laugh - becoming louder and louder as if to taunt him for what he had done. Because instead of stitching you together as he was supposed to, the possibility of your imminent death had made him snap.

Stein had hurt you back then, he was sure of it.

"Hey, Franky..."

The man froze in shock at you being awake, but before he could rush out you took a hold of his hand and immediately led it to the scar - he was an open book to you, after all. "I know what you're brooding about...it's alright."

"Y/N, I- back then..." he gulped harshly, only able to watch in awe at how content you smiled at him. It just wasn't logical, how much you trusted him. "Did I-"

"No, you didn't."

Something in his eyes, this intense vulnerability gave it away that he would not belive you in the slightest. He reluctantly let his fingers glide over the terribly healed scar, clenching his jaw in anger. No way he had treated it.

"It's true you went berserk back then" you chuckled awkwardly, yawning sleepily as if this was no serious matter. "Kinda scared me, to be honest."

Stein retracted his hand, facing the ground with an unreadable expression. If only you could read his thoughts you wished, or maybe it was better that you can't. There was a reason his mind chose to block out certain things.

"I've never seen someone singlehandedly defeat so many enemies without their weapon." That was sugarcoating to be honest, he literally obliterated them. Usually, you rather chose not thinking about that day too much, wanting to forget ever having seen him that way. It simply hurt too much. "You didn't even stop to tear them apart even after they died, until-"

"...I heared you scream."

"Yeah." Stein looked at you in disbelief as you tugged on the collar of his labcoat, effectively bringing the man crouching in front of your bed to fall. Not that he would stuggle all that much anyway. "You took revenge and came back. All just for me."

Even in this state of madness Stein wasn't able to even lay a finger on you back then, yet sadly he was also mentally in no condition to treat your wounds nonetheless.

"Our past doesn't define us" you whispered confidently, putting the blanket over the two of you. "Neither does your madness. You don't need to be fixed, or shunned, or punished. Just be yourself, that's perfect for me."

Cupping his cheeks between your palms, you felt Stein pressing your whole body against him as if he feared you to disappear if he was to ever let go.

How could it be that you've seen him at his worst, and could still always look at him with that emotion no one else had ever directed towards him?

This was simply too good to be true. Maybe his mind was leading him on him again, showing him what he desired most just to torture him with taking it away-

"I love you, Stein."

Before he could object, that confession would be sealed with a kiss, covering his slight agape mouth with your lips...

...and eventually he allowed himself to indulge in that sensation, closing his eyes as he reciprocated your gift.

You made sure to peck another, more gentle kiss onto his lips, forehead, collarbone, before an overchallenged Stein turned you around and clung onto your back.

"It's okay. You don't have to say anything."

Franken's face was buried in your neck, heavy breaths evening out against your skin. "I think I'll accept the teaching job at the DMWA."

"Really?" That sure was a sudden change of topic, but this way probably came more natural to him than to actually talk about what he was feeling. "That sounds nice. You actually seem to have taken a liking to those kids, huh?"

"They kinda remind me of us back then." You snickered at the thought. "God, I sure hope not. We were awful teenagers."

"Just the two of us against the rest of the world..." Stein mumbled against your skin, his soft snore already entering your ear as you added "That never changed."

Tonight, the two of you had found peace within each other.

#soul eater #dr. stein #dr. franken stein #dr. stein / reader #franken stein / reader #dr. franken stein / reader #self insert

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