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the-catboy-minyan · 2 months

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why so many people don't recognize that their antizionism is antisemitic, in my opinion:

(disclaimer: this is not an educational post, it will not have sources for claims, and is not meant to be read as the objective truth. it is solely my observation and opinions. civil debate and criticism is encouraged in both the notes and reblogs, I will do my best to answer those and correct my post if necessary. edits will be highlighted in pink, if this is a reblog, press the original post to see the most updated version. English is not my first Language, I might have used the wrong words for some terms.)

The Meaning Of Zionism:

this section is meant to highlight the difference between

firstly, they falsely believe the term Zionism means supporting genocide or Netanyahu's government, when most Jews don't use the term Zionism that way. Zionism has many different meanings and subgroups, as Jews love to argue (/j but Judaism encourages debate and personal interpretation), but all meanings are built on the original idea of "Jewish self determination in their indigenous land/creating and maintaining a Jewish country somewhere in the world" (yes, technically believing giving Israelis land somewhere else to be Israel is a form of Zionism, I've seen that take). the methods for creating and maintaining the lands differ, so is the belief of what land should be considered Israel, but all forms of Zionism rely on that core belief. while Zionists may support those things, that is not an integral part for Zionism, and many Zionists oppose those ideas and condemn them.

in addition, they falsely believe Zionism is in favor of illegal occupation and apartheid, which only specific subgroups of Zionists (extremely right-wing Zionists) are in favor of. Zionism is, again, mostly about an end goal (establishing and maintaining a Jewish state (which currently means in Eretz Israel)), and people will have different opinions on how to achieve it, including extremist and racist opinions. all movements have people who hold extremist beliefs, and are usually condemned by other members of their movement, Zionism is no exception.

they don't see Zionism as Jewish. I mean, there are more Christian Zionists than there are Jews in the world! of course it's not Jewish! lets ignore the fact the movement started by a Jewish man, was widely popular in Jewish communities and is what led to the establishment of Israel as a Jewish state.

now, let's for a moment ignore the misinterpretation of the term and assume that by saying Zionists, they refer only to people who support Netanyahu, illegal occupation in places like the west bank, war crimes committed by the IDF, etc. regardless of the Zionist's religion/ethnicity/race. (keep in mind that while that's their assumed intentions, their antizionism will still ultimately include self-identified Jewish Zionists who are strongly against these things)

Antizionist Activism and Beliefs:

have you heard accusations of antisemitism and the response "I'm not antisemitic, just antizionist"? this section will highlight the reasons why many antizionist actions or claims are seen as antisemitic by many Jews.

No Zionists Allowed: as in, excluding zionists from public, private, and online spaces. this tactic is used today to exclude many groups deemed problematic, "no [queer]phobes allowed", "no racists allowed", "no men misogynists allowed", etc. which is why on the surface, it doesn't seem antisemitic. yet this exclusion tactic is derivative from historical exclusion of ethnic groups, groups that were seen as evil/violent/sinners/subhuman were ostracised from society and denied access to public/private spaces. signs like "no blacks allowed", "no gays allowed", and, of course, "gentiles only".

Zionists Are Nazis: comparing any "evil" group to Nazis is common, they're so overly exposed to ww2 stories, especially ones that paint Nazi germany as pure evil cartoon villains, that they have no idea what the term Nazi actually means anymore. Nazism is based on race theory and antisemitism, it's the creator of the term antisemitism to make it sound more scientific instead of discriminatory, in Mein Kamph, Hitler wrote that almost every "issue" in the world is the fault of Jews. comparing the extremely antisemitic, supremacist, racist, homophobic, ableist, etc. ideology of Nazism to a Jewish movement for self determination is in fact antisemitic. (it is also wrong to throw the term Nazi around for any reason, but especially for a Jewish movement)

Zionists Control The Media/Government/etc: the belief that there's a secret organisation controlling the media is an old conspiracy theory, which comes from the genuine fear of your government feeding the people propaganda to sway their opinion in favor of the government to let it do what it wants. it's is good to believe the media is biased, as it's written by humans who are inherently biased, but to outright claim the entirety of media is untrustworthy when it's not hailed from a dictatorship is a harmful belief. this is what antivaxxers believed during the pandemic, what conspiracy theorists believed for centuries, and believe it or not, it's at least partially derived from the antisemitic belief of Jews controlling the banks and conspiracies like The Protocols of the Elders of Zion.

Rid The World Of Zionists: again, there are many other activist groups that believe their enemy should be eradicated, that if they believe in or have done xyz, they deserve their rights to be taken away from them and to die. this is dehumanization, and an oppression tactic. the moment you say "this type of person doesn't deserve rights because they're evil", the moment people are gonna start getting falsely accused of falling into that type with the purpose of silencing them or getting their rights revoked. + the before point of political exclusion being derivative of ethnic/religious/racial exclusion. we've seen many people getting accused of being secretly Zionists for even mentioning the hostages.

Zionists Want Genocide/Are Bloodthirsty (a reminder that this is under the assumption that Zionists blindly support the current Israeli government and the IDF's war crimes): this is both straight up a variation of blood libel, and extremely hypocritical.

blood libel started as the antisemitic accusations that Jews kidnapped Christian children on Passover to creat Matzot, while no one beliefs are that extreme anymore, the underlying belief that Jews are violent and enjoy murder still exists, and was shifted to be about Israelis. the "it was self defense!" accusation that claims Israelis are just itching for their enemies to strike first to get the opportunity to respond violently and use self defense as an excuse, for example.

hypocritical as in, this goes hand in hand with the belief that Zionists should be killed. "Zionists support genocide so they should all die a violent and gruesome death" is a take I've seen MULTIPLE TIMES - and being said completely seriously, not in the comedic tumblr way of "my blorbo is cringe? wrong, killing you with hammers :3" - and is extra hypocritical when they very strongly oppose the idea of "Hamas are terrorists who committed atrocities therefore they should all die" (and ftr I don't claim they should support that).

there are people who believe that violence is necessary for an end goal, extreme violence even. that doesn't make them bloodthirsty or violent people, it makes them radicalized. there are some Zionists who believe the only way to maintain safety in Israel is to not only eradicate Hamas, but to eradicate Gaza, as they believe that all the people of Gaza are brainwashed to be violently against Israel and pro martyrdom (as in suicide attacks), and thus a threat to Israel's safety. there are some antizionists who believe the only way to free Palestine and bring safety to Gaza is to eradicate Zionists, as they believe that all Zionists are brainwashed to hate Palestinians and to be pro illegal occupation and ethnic cleansing, and are thus a threat to Palestine and their human rights. both of these beliefs are radical and false.

Zionist Blocklists: this is mostly an online problem, but Zionists have been doxxed IRL (and I don't mean individuals, massive lists of hundreds of alleged Zionists) for the same reasons those blocklists exists. people are gathering usernames of "Zionists" online to "warn other users" from interacting with them, with the disclaimer of "I'm not telling you to harass them, don't interact, just block". not only does it encourage to never hear the opposing side, thus pushing you further into an echo chamber of only voices that agree with you and never actually learning from the source what are the opinions you oppose, it ultimately creates a neat little list of people to harass because of the before mentioned dehumanizing belief that evil people deserve violence against them. suddenly sending death threats is easier than ever, and it's justified since these are allegedly evil people. you're not encouraged to double check if these people are actually Zionists, there's no explanation as to why they're on the list, you just have to trust the op.

Boycotting Zionist Companies: The Idea of boycotting companies or other organisations that support unethical causes is also, again, not new. People boycott companies that donated to anti-lgbtq organisations or that relied on slavery for their product creation. and yet the companies who are being boycotted are

Israeli companies, which are not necessarily supporting the Israeli government, it would be like boycotting every Chinese company because of the Uyghur genocide.

companies which helped Israel in some way, like McDonald's, which donated meals to Israeli soldiers during the start of the war (this is again a reminder that the majority of McDonald's income is real estate). there are arguments to be made to justify these type of boycotts, as they're similar to other justifications for different causes, yet unless these companies have directly funded the IDF's weaponry, the arguments for boycotting is flimsy at best.

companies which mentioned the hostages, like Paramount, which ran an Israeli ad for the release of the hostages. mentioning the hostages is not the same as condoning war crimes, it's recognizing there are innocent Israelis wrapped up in this conflict, just as supporting a free Palestine is not the same as supporting Hamas.

organisations that allowed Israel to participate, like Eurovision. there's just no reason to disallow a country to participate in a songs competition due to being in a war.

events that happen "while Israel is bombing Gaza". American events like the Oscars that happen on a set date and have nothing to do with Israel have no reason to be boycotted just for happening on the same day a war is happening.

Starbucks. why is Starbucks being boycotted? it had done nothing in support of Israel, literally fucking none, it's being boycotted for supporting Palestine wrong, once, on October. it doesn't operate in Israel, it never said anything publicly in support of Israel, there's literally 0 reason to boycott it????????????

anyways. while there are different reasons and justifications for every company or event, there's this silly little thing that happened in Nazi Germany that was boycotting Jewish business, in response to the "anti-nazi boycott". the Jewish boycotts were unsuccessful on paper, but ingrained the Nazi idea of Jews being inferior.

The Harm It Does For The Jewish Community:

The Overlap: the majority of Jews are Zionists, not in the sense of supporting genocide, but in the Jewish meaning(s) of believing a Jewish state should exist or is in some way beneficial for Jewish safety. by excluding and silencing Zionists, the antizionist crowd are excluding and silencing the majority of jewish people. a Jewish person who wants to integrate back into their circles has to refute their Zionism in fear of being seen as a genocide supporter, a Jewish person who refuses to hide their beliefs will be labeled evil and be ostracized. actual right-wing zionists would stay away from these spaces anyways for being leftist/centrist spaces, thus the exclusion is effective only on leftist Jews who dare believe Israel should exist.

"Zionism Isn't Judaism": is a claim many antizionists make, yet time and time again we see synagogues, Jewish schools, and Jewish neighborhood get targeted by antizionist protests. Jewish spaces are being attacked, even if you claim it is by a minority, these are still actions that are largely ignored by the antizionist crowd and aren't being condemned. you know, by the people who believe that silence is violence?

Can't Have A Single Positive Opinion About Israel: you have an Israeli relative that enlisted to the IDF? they should have refused servitude and gone to jail, you're a genocide supporter. You've done a birthright trip and it was nice? ew, everyone knows every inch of Israel is full of illegal settlements and apartheid, genocide supporter. you talked about the hostages? propaganda, genocide supporter. Israel passed a pro lgbtq law? pinkwashing propaganda, genocide supporter. you don't think Israel is an occupying terrorist force that oppresses their own citizens and deserves to be burned to the ground? genocide supporter, from the river to the sea!!!

Eretz Israel (not the State of Israel) is an integral part of Judaism. most of our holidays are about Israel in some way, some our traditions require Israel as a place, we bury our dead with soil from Israel, we vow to never forget Jerusalem during our weddings, we celebrate our agriculture and our miracles which happened there, our ancient holy cites are there, so are our ancestors (for ethnic Jews). many Jews are going to have at least a single positive or even a neutral opinion about Israel, and see it as a Jewish land.

The Israeli Identity: since people see Israel as an illegal settlement, apartheid, genocidal, terrorist state, etc, they also see Israelis as complicit in those crimes. every Israeli they meet is going to immediately be a criminal, Israelis are not a "real Jews" (that makes half the Jewish population fake), in the case Israel is dismantled and Israelis are forced to "go back to where they came from", will those countries accept them with open arms? or will the boycotts continue? what about Mizrahi Jews which hailed from the Arab world? do you think they'll even be allowed to live after their country's crimes against Palestine? will the Houtis let them when their flag has "death to Israel" on it (most Mizrahis are Yemeni)? if citizens are the same as their government, would that mean every Russian immigrant is an evil spy who wants to murder Ukrainians? just some questions to think about.

in conclusion: I'm tired. I've been writing for 3 hours. bye.

#antisemitism #israel #am yisrael chai #leftist antisemitism #antizionism #antizionism is antisemitism #← when done in the ways I've explained in the post #antisemitism on tumblr #tumblr antisemitism #zionism #jewish zionism

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olderthannetfic · 10 days

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The ongoing and seemingly continuous discussion of f/f shipping is equal parts frustrating and depressing for me.

I like f/f, m/m, and m/f pairings equally, but you’ll only ever see me posting about m/m and m/f on my blog or on my AO3 because of the responses I’ve gotten to my headcanons and fics. I have gotten passive aggressive insults, been called slurs, and even gotten death threats, not because I ship f/f but because I ship the “wrong kind” of f/f.

For example: 5 years ago I was really big into the She-Ra (2018) fandom and my OTP was Glimdora (Glimmer/Adora), an f/f ship. But they were an unpopular ship in the fandom who overall preferred to ship Adora with the series antagonist (also a woman) instead.

My blog was spammed with Anon hate and Tumblr kept sending me those emails asking if I was a risk for self harm. On my AO3 I got accused of being homophobic or lesbian phobic even though I was posting fics of two women being in love.

I got sick of it, so I left the fandom and now I just don’t post my f/f fic or headcanons anymore. I share them with my IRL friends instead.

Like, I agree, it does suck royally that there just isn’t very much f/f content out there, especially not compared to m/m and m/f ship. But f/f spaces made it very clear that I, a person who did write and post f/f fics, was not welcome in f/f spaces.

It makes me depressed because it’s hard enough being an AFAB person in a world that hates both women and queer people IRL. F/f communities online SHOULD be a haven for us. But they for that to happen we need to accept all f/f, but we don’t. Our communities are overly concerned with “letting the right ones in”.

And I’m frustrated when I post after post of fellow f/f shippers screaming into the void begging for more f/f content. Like, my sisters, if you WANT more f/f content you need to ALLOW more f/f content.

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vaspider · 1 year

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Intro Post, updated March 1, 2023

I post all asks under the name they were submitted under, and I post them when I feel like answering them. I will never honor a request to answer an ask privately or anonymously. Anon is never turned on. These are hard self-care boundaries. Please block the tag "harassment tag" if you don't want to be subjected to some of the horrible shit I get sent sometimes.

If you like what I do, please consider hiring me, consider buying something from NerdyKeppie (the shop I own with my spouse - we do custom work!), consider buying me a coffee or becoming a Patron or tossing some money in my PayPal tip jar. I am a disabled, queer, fat, Jewish non-binary butch whose entire income is derived from selling Quality Queerwear via our company NerdyKeppie (we also offer patches of all sorts, nerd gear, etc -- if you don’t see it, ask!), Patreon (queer fiction for a dollar) and freelance work.

If asking me to boost a post for you, ask at most once per week, and please don't make that the only way you interact with me, or follow me just to send an ask that I boost your posts. I notice, and I'll end up just blocking you if you make me feel "used." It's gross, y'all. I'm glad to help, but don't use me. It's getting to a point where I'm starting to feel pretty gross about it, and I'm one of the more relaxed ppl about boosting posts, so please don't put me in a position where I feel like I have to stop doing it.

I will not debate my identity or its history with anyone. I am a transmasculine non-binary butch lesbian, a cripple, a dyke, and lots of other things, too. You don't get a vote in that, and if any of those words are words you can't stand to have someone use around you in reference to himself, go ahead and block me. I won't censor my identity for your comfort; I took a long time becoming proud of who I am.

No, I am not an anti or an anti-anti. Literally no one cares about these distinctions outside of Tumblr. Please leave me alone. I am not going to have that conversation. No is a complete sentence.

I’m not interested in interacting with TWERFs, SWERFs, or any sort of exclusionary LGBTQ/queer people. Y'all are exhausting.

Do the work to root out TERF/2nd-wave "man bad woman good" philosophies from your head. Do the work to root out the gendered behavior you were taught. I am not here to raise other people's children.

I am not here to raise other people's children. My daughter is an adult and I am done being responsible for the experiences of a minor. If you read or interact with me, you acknowledge that you chose to do that and I can't control what happens to what I post once I post it on my Tumblr. People will reblog it and I can't control where it ends up. I can only control what I say in my space, which I do.

Curate your own online experiences. If you don't like seeing what I write, then add 'vaspider' to your "filtered content" list and don't bother me about it. Tumblr is a 17+ environment and I am not responsible for you seeing things you don't like. Adults having adult conversations do not need to be filtered for children. This is your notification.

I’ve been Out for over 30 years. I don't tolerate lectures from strangers, especially people half my age, about history I lived through.

I'm transmasc and if you believe transmisandry/transandrophobia aren't "real things," or that transmascs aren't "really oppressed," please just leave me alone. Oppression Olympics are bad, actually.

My immediate family consists of my partners, my adult daughter, and our dogs.

No one in my immediate family is cis or het. I have been called Spider for 20+ years, & now a lot of people call me Mama Spider. Mom is a role, it need not be gendered.

This is a lot shorter than it used to be. I don't really feel like posting paragraphs explaining stuff anymore.

My icon has lore, apparently.

I post all asks and anon is never turned on.

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safety-pin-punk · 11 months

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firstly, I love your blog and it's been a great resource to have as I've been learning abt punk! I hope you're well & ty for everything you do <3 do you have any advice for finding punk communities, both irl and online? I really wanna talk to ppl abt everything I'm learning and loving, but it's really hard to find communities. besides the landmine of trying to avoid nazi punks and the like, I don't rlly drink or anything so bars/clubs can be weird -teacupqueer/persie

Thank you so much!! I’m doing pretty well!

Finding Punk Communities Online:

I’ll be honest, I can really only speak on behalf of tumblr here. I don’t use other socials all that much.

But! If you want to find a fun awesome punk community on tumblr, you are already off to a great start! Find a punk blog you like or who has similar music taste, see who they reblog from and tag in their posts. I’ve met a LOT of really cool people this way on here! (Shoutout to @polyamorouspunk and @my-chemical-ratz whose blogs you should check out simply because they are cool people). And I’ve also met people who are in bands, or involved with bands (like @necromancy-savant and @dopamineband (who don’t use their tumblr anymore 😭)). I didn’t meet these people right away, it took a while of steady interaction with tumblr to build up these connections.

There are also Discord communities too, I don’t use discord much but I *think* (?) I saw a post go around a while ago where someone was starting up a punk discord server? Honestly maybe I’ll take the time to start one up, it might make me use Discord more lmao

Finding Punk Communities IRL:

Bars and clubs aren’t the only places to find punks!!

I’d recommend checking out any queer spaces in your area, I doubt it would surprise you to learn how often these two groups overlap.

Also! If you are near a city, chances are you have an underground scene somewhere. Google and Reddit are great resources to find the places punks gather in your city. For example: in my city theres a cafe and record shop that are popular among the alternative crowd that I never would have found without the use of Google.

Otherwise, what are your hobbies? If you like gardening/are into solar punk, see if theres a local gardening club! (I’d say a 50/50 chance of punk or karens tbh with this one).

Start up a book club at a local library that focuses on books like 1984 and Brave New World.

Go to gigs that arent at bars or clubs, I went to one back in February that was at an abandoned church, that was turned into a concert venue. The place was child friendly so there was no alcohol, but there were a lot of cool people there!

And the best tip I have for you to avoid nazis is to just know their symbols and signs. Do a bit of research on it and familiarize yourself with what to avoid

As always, other suggestions for anon are welcome!!

#mail tag #punk #punx

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daughter-of-sapph0 · 1 year

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the club q shooter is not nonbinary!

he is not! he is a cishet homophobic transphobic man! his father is extremely homophobic and was more upset at the possibility of him being gay than him being a mass murderer! he never claimed to be non-binary! on all his social media, it's constant hatred and bigotry against queer people! he goes to a homophobic church! he constantly posts homophobic slurs and hate speech online! his lawyer only claimed he was nonbinary to get the hate crime charges dropped! far right reporters and news sources are more upset at the fake rumor that this guy is nonbinary than they are at the fact that he killed five people in what is supposed to be a safe space!

look at what they're doing. for decades they have been saying the most horrific disgusting shit and using nazi rhetoric to spread hate and incite violence against us. they called us groomers, pedophiles, disease spreaders, all with no proof at all. they will literally make up shit, so we have to spend time and energy proving a made up talking point is incorrect instead of actually progressing. and now we've reached the absolute peak of homophobic and transphobic violence. these people have done everything to inspire the killer apart from giving him the fucking gun. and immediately after the attack, they skipped straight over the "oh, this guy is bad we don't agree with him" bs phase because they already know no one will believe them. they went straight into "well actually those five people deserved to die because that bar was hosting drag show... wait... library reading.... kids dancing... uh... something bad.... like grooming... yeah... there's a poster from that bar that says 'we fuck children Wednesday nights 8-12pm'. no I don't have this poster. you just have to trust me" and all this other stupid pathetic easily disproven bullshit. but the far right actually believe it because they can't listen to anyone else. they decide that this made up evidence is grounds for being murdered, and that somehow makes it okay. but now, they're going to deny they ever said that shit even though it's all online and public forever. they're going back to the "oh this was extremely unjustified and terrible and we don't agree" because now they have a reason to hate the killer. they think he's nonbinary. he isn't. they're going to say this is "queer on queer crime" when it isn't. they're going to say this is an issue specifically isolated to the queer community, when it isn't. they're going to blame all nonbinary people for this attack, when they didn't blame all homophobic people for this attack three days ago. they're going to use this stupid made up evidence as another stupid talking point that will inspire more murderers and more hate crimes. don't believe them. nothing the far right says is true anymore. it's all lies. they want to commit genocide on anyone they don't like.

for your protection and the protection of the entire queer community:

buy a gun and learn to use it. defend yourself and your community

#dostxt #homophobia #transphobia #club q

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rainbowdaisy13 · 5 days

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A few months ago, I was really feeling a lot of bitterness and even a kind of hatred toward Taylor, and now I feel bad about it. There's something in the air these past few days that's making me think that Taylor has lurked in our realm before. Probably recently. Taylor, if you're somehow reading this, I don't feel that way anymore. I'm really sorry.

I think most of us have been there!! This situation has felt so draining and demoralizing as kaylors because we have essentially taken the brunt of the homophobia towards Taylor’s queerness for her in online spaces for years. All the while hoping for a more direct nod from her that we are correct, she sees us and acknowledges our struggles too

TTPD was a giant I SEE YOU BECAUSE YOU SEE ME in my opinion

Over the years I too have been hard on her at times and that’s just part of being human! People you care about and want the best for can hurt you the most. All that to say don’t be too hard on yourself—now we know truly where she is at going forward and TTPD gave us that

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leafie-draws · 22 days

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maybe I'm just being bad brain sad today but I wish i had friends

like having something remotely like a support group or community irl idk I think it would fix me I always struggled at making friends and keeping them, they'd always get annoyed or bored with me or became toxic or abusive. I feel like I haven't had a real Good Friend since Brooklyn passed away and I guess I'm still recovering from that. we used to hang out all the time, even if I looked and felt like shit she'd say "let's look and feel like shit together!" and we'd get coffee and snacks and just watch anime together in our pjs or something. I never felt judged, or weird or boring when I was around her and I feel like I'll never have that feeling again, y'know? and I'm so distrusting of people now I can't tell if it's the cptsd or paranoia or something else I just feel nervous and skittish around people like I can't let my guard down anymore and just push people away when they try to get close. making friends was so much easier when I was a teen on deviantart lmao I had so many irl and online friends I could talk to and I'd get invited to movie/game nights and sleepovers and parties and now it's like 💀 like I know I'm not the most social person and my partner's family tries but I still feel weird and judged, like I can't show them my art or anything because "uuuuu furries weird uuuu" and ofc there's politics and gender stuff I can't talk to them about hhhh so it's like nobody irl even knows the real me because I gotta mask so many aspects of myself just to be percieved as "normal" or even acceptable in most spaces AAAAAAAAAGH idk maybe one day I can move somewhere that has a good furry/queer/art scene and I could make some friends there, or at least a girl can dream ;3;

#leafie speaks #personal #vent

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fakeshibe · 7 months

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the internet is so overtly hostile to kids and young people. commercialisation and profit margins killed off the places younger kids were safe and welcome to be in, creeps and those seeking to goad people towards extremism took over those spaces designated for teens.

There is no safe place. Every time i see a 14 year old on twitter, I see them being told to get off the platform. It’s not safe, it’s not for you. And that’s entirely correct, twitter is not a safe place for a 14 year old, but where is? Tumblr? not really. Club penguin? it’s dead. Community forums? not really a thing anymore. Discord? not without that teen being very aware of their safety and how to look after themselves, at which point they may as well have stuck to twitter.

Like it or not, it’s the job of every single one of us to make a space that is safe for teens. Doesn’t mean you have to be kid friendly, just means you need to take reasonable precautions that your not-kid-friendly content stays in your space, that they can’t accidentally come across it. Content warnings, censoring/spoilering posts, possibly avoiding the main tags for a thing if that topic is child friendly and your art is not. stuff like that. Like if young people are likely to search for stuff like lego, maybe don’t put your nsfw bionicle ship art into the general lego tag, stuff like that.

It’s your job to keep an eye out for your fellow humans. If you see a young person they you know displaying signs that they’re possibly being harassed/groomed/generally made uncomfortable/not doing well, make sure they have a safe person to speak to. You don’t have to be that safe person, you just need to make sure there’s someone who can listen to them.

If you see a kid doing something they really shouldn’t be, it’s on you to explain why they shouldn’t be doing that. Don’t berate them, don’t attack them for it. Explain, help them to understand why that’s concerning to you. We all know internet safety classes in schools are pretty rubbish, usually super outdated. I did a child safety course like two years ago that still included tips on building a safe myspace page. School isn’t going to teach kids about the immediate issues on todays internet, it’s on the community around them to guide them and look out for them.

Also playground humour is fine, just be aware when you’re joining in to not take it too far or make it weird. And bear in mind that even just by virtue of being a couple of years older than whatever young person you’re talking to, there’s a power imbalance in that conversation. Don’t encourage playground humour to the point of making it an entirely inappropriate topic. Your the one guiding this conversation, steer it in the right direction.

And if you see someone being weird towards any minor, wether you know them or not, call that shit out. Let it be known that someone is keeping an eye out, let that kid know that they’re welcome and they’re looked out for. Let that creep know that people see them, and people are very, very aware of what they’re doing. Make them feel unwelcome, run them out of your spaces, spread awareness of risky people. Keep your spaces safe.

This is all especially as important as IRL spaces become more hostile to potentially vulnerable young people. Queer teens especially are going to be looking for community and safety online more and more frequently. Make sure that the places they find will be a respite from the real world, not just a different set of threats to navigate.

Make sure young people feel safe on the internet, and make sure that those looking to take advantage of their presence, don’t.

Why am i writing all this? I’ve seen too many posts about people’s experiences as a young person online, and i talked to my brother the other day about him and his friend’s experiences and it’s terrifying that there’s really nowhere for young people to go. Also i’ve realised that i’m not doing enough to be part of the solution. so this is part of that, im gonna be far, far more aware of the issue and doing more to try and help.

#internet safety #This post brought to you by seeing several communities on twitter oust dodgy people the last few days #no beef with bionicle fans btw i just couldn’t think of another example

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jewish-vents · 18 days

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Lately I've been just gritting my teeth and forcing myself to deal with more and more ableist and aphobic microaggressions from fellow Jews because the Jewish community is all I have left now that the wider queer and disabled communities are absolutely not safe for Jews anymore. It sucks and I'm sick of it. There's nowhere I can just exist.

And I'm hesitant to even send this ask because I know damn well any goy who sees it is just gonna use any discussion of ableism or queerphobia in our community as another excuse to attack Jews.

I feel you, I've been more willing to turn a blind eye to transphobia (as a trans person) and ableism (as a neurodivergent and disabled person) due to how small my online spaces have already gotten, it used to be an instant block but not it's just speaking up every time a mutual says something bigoted and hope they're normal about it.

something a lot of chronically online people forget is that you can't cherry pick your interactions irl, and you're gonna have to interact with bigoted people at some point. you can't always pick a fight or avoid these people, at some point you're gonna have to learn to get along with them. because people who hold bigoted beliefs are still human, and their bigotry more often than not comes from ignorance or misinformation. it won't be your responsibility to "fix" them, but you'll have to learn to get along if you have to share the same space as them.

- 🐬

#jewish vents #antisemitism #ableism #aphobia #transphobia #bigotry

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qqueenofhades · 11 months

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Genuinely hope this isn't too weird or personal or a rant but here goes

Recently I've been having a bit of a sexuality crisis and I don't know what's going on. I'm a cis woman and I've never had any interest in men at all for my entire life and knew I wanted to be with a woman, I was completely confident I was gay because I just never felt anything toward men that I do women. But recently I have this one male friend who I'm very good friends with and he recently asked me out on a date. I've known him for a while and looking back, it's embarrassingly obvious that I had a crush. Like I quite literally described it as a platonic crush (spoiler alert: it was not platonic) to one of my friends and compared it to the exact same feelings as a romantic one and I would not shut up about him and how he's an amazing, wonderful person, which he absolutely is.

And I've had crushes on women before which was probably why I was... in denial, for lack of a better phrase? And I didn't want to ruin anything I had with him as a friendship, I had no idea how I felt, and apparently every single one of our mutual friends realized that something was up except for me. He also knows I'm some flavor of not-straight even if I've never explicitly been "hi I'm a lesbian" just because it's never come up in conversation and he's cool with that, even if he's straight himself. But he's such a nice and amazing person and I'm really excited for whatever might happen and I feel like even if it doesn't work out romantically he'd still be a great friend.

I never had the "oh my god am I gay" sexuality crisis, I was just always gay and confident in that about myself, and to make things even worse, I'm not publicly out but basically all my friends do know that I thought I was lesbian and it's actually kinda hard trying to be like "yeah I thought I was gay too, apparently I'm straighter than I thought" but this is an incredibly recent development, I still feel more comfortable with a lesbian label than bi or pan or anything but I'm completely and hopelessly attracted romantically to a man and I feel like I've lost the right to use that label as someone who is apparently NOT exclusively attracted to women when up until about a week ago, I spent my entire life thinking I was. And everything that's going on all of a sudden is just weird and confusing and frustrating and there's a lot of good stuff and a lot of not-so-good stuff all associated with this.

So I dunno, if you have any sort of advice or anything to say, I'm not sure, I just feel like I need to talk about this somehow and try to figure out who I am and how I'm feeling, and this is really hard

Welp. Oh honey. I feel bad that instead of being able to just enjoy the possibility of a new romance with a great person, you have to worry about whether you're the "right" kind of queer or whether you "can't" identify as a lesbian anymore or all of this. I can definitely see the rhetorical roots of what's worrying you, and especially the way it is viciously propagated in online queer spaces, so yeah.

First of all, and most important: absolutely nobody, NOBODY, in the entire world gets to tell you which label you should or should not use, or try to strip it from you. I know the younger queer community in general is INCREDIBLY fond of restrictive gatekeeping, attempting to devise micro-labels for everything, and insisting that you have to be Just One Thing and Not Another, but it's... not true. It's not that you're "straighter than you thought" (which in this framework is automatically pejorative/less worthy than being "properly gay"), it's just that sexuality is fluid, the queer experience is fluid, and you've found someone that you're attracted to regardless of gender -- which is the whole concept of queer sexuality in a nutshell. If any of your friends want to give you grief or insist that you're a Bad Lesbian or whatever, I cordially invite them to take a nice perambulation into the nearest body of water. It is NOT THEIR BUSINESS and if they want to shame you for discovering something new about yourself, rather than support you, then fuck 'em. I am so serious. If you're still most comfortable identifying as a lesbian, that's what you are! Over time, you might decide to move to more of a bi/pan label, or just "queer," or whatever else. Or you may not. Either one is totally fine.

Secondly, this feeling has its roots in the radfem ideology of the 1970s, which has been repackaged, reheated, and distributed in TERF spaces today, and obviously fuck TERFs, we don't welcome TERFs or anything they think about in this space, so yeah. The idea was that women who had any kind of romantic or sexual attraction to men at all were "inferior," that "gold star lesbians" only ever had sex with/romantic relationships with women, and that any queer woman/wlw who had any kind of attraction to men was just obliged by the patriarchy to pretend that they did. In other words, bisexual women were just "lesbians in waiting" who were deluding themselves about wanting men at all, sexual contact with men made you "impure" or less "worthy," and all kinds of other gross things. This is obviously a) wrong, b) hella biphobic, c) and still harmfully prevalent in modern TERF spaces, which do their utmost to convince the younger queer generations that this is the "only right way" to do it. Which, since being queer is all about breaking singular paradigms and embracing fluidity, is total nonsense. It's why they hate the word "queer" itself and try to convince people that it's the "q-slur," because it's too deliberately broad, non-determinative, and inclusive.

Take me for example: as a younger person, I first experienced attraction to/romantic interest in men, so I assumed (HA) that I was straight, and totally ignored the part where I also had those feelings about women. (The amount of "I bet straight women also have these thoughts!" that I did was, uh, a lot.) It wasn't until my late 20s that I consciously acknowledged it and went uh hey, super not straight here, so I began identifying as bisexual. Now in my mid-thirties, when I'm only attracted to women in real life, mostly want to spend time with women, and would only think about marrying a woman, I've decided that "lesbian" is probably the best term for me. But I still do experience attraction to men from time to time! Usually a man that I have no chance of ever actually meeting or having a relationship with; i.e. blorbo from my shows or something like that, and when the hyperfixation fades, the attraction often (if not always) does as well. So maybe there's an element of knowing that I WON'T actually have to do anything about it that plays into it. Who knows. The point is, I still call myself a lesbian, because it's what makes the most sense for my orientation as I experience it, and I do not have to drum myself out of using this label because I still sometimes find men attractive. There are a lot of people in the world! There are a lot of experiences! There is no one RIGHT way to be LGBTQ, and anyone telling and/or insisting that there is, and that you should be shamed if you don't do it exactly in their narrow-minded, bigoted way, should safely and swiftly be completely ignored.

Anyway: you should feel absolutely free to pursue this relationship, you should feel absolutely free to call yourself whatever you damn well please, and if that evolves over time, great! If it doesn't, also great! You alone know who you are and have the most right to define your identity and experience, and anyone who would give you grief over it is definitely, DEFINITELY not worth the time of day.

#anonymous #ask

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