#but bringing up being mentally unwell gets me a sad face emoticon at best

[krispyykrab]

there is really something cruel and strange and fucked up about switching between thinking youre the center of the universe and thinking youre completely invisible 50 fuckin times a day. like do you have a god complex or an inferiority complex make up your mind

#the mental illness strikes again #yeah its that and like this crippling lonliness that has had me in a chokehold #pov you open the same 3 apps over and over again on repeat all day trying to see if anyone has messaged you or interacted with you at all #then you realize oh wait yeah. they all have lives and you dont. yeah that explains it #then you self loathe and pity for a bit and repeat the cycle #mad pathetic #and on top of that youre too fuckin sensitive so you take it all personal #even stupid jokes. yeah that stupid joke it hurt my feelings and for no reason at all #im not even really sad right now its just. so painfully frustrating that this has to be the normal for me #no matter how many times i seek help for it i get blown off #not to mention im *still* fucked up over not being able to go to the one person i relied on to help me when i was mentally unwell #though ive tried #but bringing up being mentally unwell gets me a sad face emoticon at best #and bringing up being physically unwell and that ive had to go to multiple doctors over the past few months is just. completely ignored #oh well #i am completely over that person but that doesnt mean getting ignored doesnt fucking hurt #anyways