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fmdjoosungarchive · 3 years

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restructuring task 1

+5 tracker points

1. assuming your muse has changed in some way, be it internally or as a result of a change of the external factors around them, how is your muse different? these can be as small as an opinion on a song they hadn’t released previously or as big as a major change in their background.

wc: 365

idk if i’ve said this on dash yet, but i’m treating new famed more or less like an au. in sung’s au, the defining change is that he was let go from gold star when he had his injury as a trainee. it was always my headcanon that they truly were close to cutting him loose anyway, so this is just the other side of that. he had his injury, got plastic surgery to try to appease them into keeping him, and they still let him go. when he went home his parents said alright u tried that now join the fam business n sung freaked bc he realized he doesnt want that for himself so he went to do smth he also hated, and joined the military. while there he still worked on his dance and vocals whenever he had a moment to do so, so that when he was discharged and started auditioning again, he wasn’t so rusty

he is a year younger in this world, just bc of quantum’s age range, not for any other reason. makes him a little less of a cradle robber in his relationship lol which, another change is that daisuke wouldn’t have been his first kiss, just first everything else

quantum is very different from old element and new element, but it’s very in line with what i liked about quicksilver (& has models from that) and he’s a leader! this is an idea ive toyed with a lot over the last three years tbh. at first i didn’t think sung suited a leader position, but he came to show me he’s just a different kind of leader. i liken him to jinki often in this regard. rather than lassoing members in, he supports them being however they are, and takes an intimate/emotional path to gaining their trust and leading them. and while he wasn’t suited for the full business life, what he learned from his father’s teachings helps him in dealing with the company as the group’s representative there (& he loves a good powerpoint presentation)

other timeline stuff for big events in his life are likely to shift but i’m not sure on specifics yet

2. what does your muse think of their company and their group?

wc: 260

as the child of a businessman, he’s never under the illusion that as a company entity, their first priority is their wellbeing. he knows that they are products, and that they’re treated as such. it’s a bit heavier with dimensions than gold star, since gold star makes a more active effort to pretend they care. however, once having accepted that, sung thinks himself and dimensions work well together. he does feel that for a company, they allow himself and his members to be a part of the creative process, as says their motto. he feels much more encouraged to write songs and choreograph under dimensions than he did under gold star, where it felt like he was constantly on his knees begging for the company to take him seriously

as for quantum, sung really loves what they’re about. he’s not a big fan of all (or most) of their songs, though he’s more loving towards a song written by another member even if it’s the same sound he dislikes, but he absolutely loves being focused on performance and concepts. his creative mind works very much on the basis of story and emotion that comes with it, and he feels like quantum’s concepts sometimes to often lean into his tastes. he’s always been a dancer first and foremost (god am i so glad to have his main dancer title back i MISSED u) so focusing on performance is v much up his alley, and his preferred style of dance is through storytelling. he feels the heart of dance is in that

3. is your muse on their first contract or their second? if they’ve renewed, what were their feelings around that at the time and what were their hopes for their second contract? if they haven’t renewed, what are their current thoughts on the end of their eventual first contract?

wc: 281

quantum’s on their first contract still, up for renewal in 2024. at the current moment, he would like to re-sign. however, unlike my others, his re-signing depends more heavily on the other members. if they were unhappy and wanted to leave, sung would want to follow suit, not because he can’t make his own decisions, but because if the reason the members want to leave is because of the company, not quantum, he’d want to try to help quantum continue to live. if that means all of the members leaving in order to rebrand under another company, so be it. he’d like to avoid lineup changes however he can, and ideally would like to be an idol for as long as possible

he himself feels alright about his treatment. he feels creatively stimulated, and appreciated for talents further than his face. if he were to try to negotiate different terms at their contract renewal, part of it would likely be wanting to give members a higher share of profits, especially on releases they’re creatively involved in. sung personally has no use for excessive money, but not all of his members have his background, and he feels more than just the money, it’s what’s fair. he’d also prefer to allow for more creative freedom. as a 7/8 year group by then, he’d think they should be allowed to take the reigns more heavily. and on his personal side of things, he would want dimensions to be more mindful of his schedule. sung enjoys working, but he’s only one person, who doesn’t want to be overworked. these are all just his current thoughts, though, and will probably change before contract renewal comes up

4. what are your muse’s goals and motivations?

wc: 294

his motivations to be ‘successful’ and/or achieve his goals are his family, namely being someone his nephew and niece can be proud of, and someone his parents can feel was worth letting go of. he feels closer to the latter than he did in old famed. his members motivate him to be a good leader, his desire to grow as a creator motivates him to write and choreograph

specific goals could be bigger like his desire for more public recognition. while quantum has a lot more recognition both in korea and abroad than element or quicksilver, sung wants the best for his group. he’d be happy if they stayed where they are with their loyal fandom, but he still aims for more

sung also wants to get better at standing up for himself. he’s best at standing up for others, because he can slap on a bit of bravado in order to help them out, but when it comes to himself, especially with his parents, he’s pretty awful at it

he’d also like to create more for quantum, and others. i/he have a goal for him to write a whole album for someone, so if anyone reads this far and could want sung writing for their muse, hit me up!

he’d like to get married and have children one day. that’s always been a dream of his, and while he knows his career doesn’t allow for that soon, it’s still on his docket

he wants to spend more time with his family, especially his nephew and niece. they’re so new to the world and learning everything, and sung wants to be a part of that. he doesnt want his part in their early lives to be ‘i don’t really remember seeing him back then’

5. what is one conflict, internal or external, that your muse is currently dealing with, has recently dealt with, or will need to deal with in the future?

wc: 291

at some point, this bitch is gonna have to admit he’s a homiesexual. in his previous version, it was a lot easier for him to ‘i pretend i do not see it’ when it came to that. sung’s very ignorant when it comes to the queer community in korea, so he’s not even really aware of terms beyond gay, maybe trans. but, terms aside, he always thought he was someone who liked women, and daisuke and a couple of others were just outliers. they were the Special ones outside of his jurisdiction that were just too good for him to not notice. aka he believed he was bi. and now, he still does, but i have less faith he’ll be able to hold that up until he dies like i did before, because he’s actually dated at least one woman before in this world. considering the plot has yet to be picked up, i don’t know the specifics, but i do think it’s harder to run away from when the way he treated a relationship with a woman and a relationship with a man were lightyears away from one another. it’s still possible for him to run away from the truth of the situation, but it’s also very possible that one day, his thoughts on it will shake, and everything will click into place (messily,, probably the messiest clicking ever) it would be a difficult thing for him to come to terms with, though i think it’s better for him in the longterm to truly know who he is, and why he acts the way he does, why he feels the way he does about women vs men. it’s also nice just to not live a lie, even if only privately

6. if your muse has established career claims, what are their thoughts on their career so far? if they do not, how do they feel about not having individual activities yet? what would they like to do in the future, if anything? if they don’t have ambitions for individual activities, explain why.

wc: 523

sung has a pretty filled history of individual activities. most are points claims with a focus on modelling, his radio, and music, though he’s dipped into pretty much ever facet of idoldom, some with more success than others. his ecp expenditures flesh that out a little more, and add a bit more realism, and/or make sense of the group changes. he had a one year modelling contract with the north face, and while official claims aren’t possible, i was inspired by a couple of things rowoon did with them. there was more of a push on an eco-friendly side of things, and there was a bit of dancing. playing into his group position with dancing i feel is fitting, but the eco friendly part i also feel could round out his image more as a good, kind boy who also can be sexy, whereas before, his earlier modelling claims focused a lot more on the sexy aspect, because it fit element and his trajectory there better. here, it makes him more dual sided from the beginning. north face is also just a nice, strong brand that i think is fitting for a pretty boi. i set it a bit after a year out from debut because i feel like that’s the most realistic, especially for a group like quantum that grew audience with each comeback

part of that first year being focusing only on the group ties into his creative claims as well! his first creative claim was with the bside love, lalala on the eternity ep. the nicest part of creative claims being unattached to positions is that all of sung’s claims are the songs in the discography most Him. so love lalala is very jazzy and smooth, and would have served as his first introduction to songwriting, as well as what made him interested in songwriting. then he was a choreographer on error, which is heavily story based, and about the members being a unit, and making beautiful pictures together. i hope to snag intro long journey and outro long journey from the beginning and end of the ateez sector, because they’re beautiful compositions that fit sung’s style, but also having him on both makes him feel like he’s a part of the concept’s creation in an intimate way, which fits with dms. then there’s aurora, which sung partially composed and partially choreographed. the choreography has contemporary flair to it, and the song is a flowing sound that matches that. then there’s partial production on sunrise, which i just love the robotic ass experimental production there, and comp for with u, which i believe ties back into sung’s rediscovering his love of piano. choreo for valkyrie is most similar to error in it’s pretty pictures way, and also has a bit of complex footwork, especially as its point dance, which is also p sung to want to include. and finally, some comp on stand by, which is like a mix of the appeal of aurora and with u methinks? listening to all of his written songs together i feel like really makes a picture of sung’s songwriting so i love that

#famedrstask1 #and the last q was me trying to keep it brief....... lol

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swindlersstole · 5 years

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8 please!

you didn’t specify for who but I know what we’re about

things to address before this starts!

the constellations are references to other games (specifically kingdom hearts, ghost trick, and rhythm thief in that order

I’m reading months in Erdrea as being based on birth month flowers (bc World Tree, we have a plant theme you see).

Eleven/Nova’s birthday is July 29th (dq11′s initial release date), making him a Leo. Larkspur is one of the two flowers for July, and represents positivity and dignity

Erik doesn’t have a date yet, but I wrote him in as an Aquarius born in Carnation (January); carnations represent admiration and love

listen to this while you read it helps

8. In a rowboat

“What’s that one?”

Erik squinted his eyes, following Nova’s finger as best he could. “Thaaat would beee… oh, that! That’s the Key of Worlds.”

“It’s a key?” Nova tilted his head, to better look at the shape in the sky; his head ended up against Erik’s shoulder, and it was nice now, Erik thought, that neither of them were too wrapped up in their own pining to panic about the contact. “Erik, that’s a sword.”

“It’s both.” Erik laughed. “The way the story goes, young people from all over were given keys to fight back darkness. They could unlock any door, and the hearts of men. But there was one key that could open up whole worlds themselves, and eventually a great war happened with each side trying to take the key for themselves. Didn’t end well for anybody. Eventually the key was hidden away, and the key wielders faded into obscurity.”

From the corner of his eye, Erik saw Nova smile before nudging him in the shoulder. “I never took you as a fantasy type.”

Erik grinned back. “Doesn’t hurt to have some stories that aren’t illegal.”

He bumped Nova’s shoulder back, a bit more rough than he’d intended, and the gondola rocked in the still waters. Gentle as it was, neither of them dared to move until it stopped.

“Sheesh,” Erik leaned forward and ran a hand through his hair, following some nervous laughter. “How many times that make it now?”

“I think that was the fifth.” Nova sighed, but he was laughing right along with him. “Leave it to us to forget we’re on a boat.”

“That never stopped us before.”

“Before we were on the Stallion. We couldn’t rock that if we tried.”

“Details.”

Erik settled back down against the parecio, and Nova draped the blanket they’d been sharing over his shoulders again. Truth be told, a surprise date to Gondolia hadn’t been on Erik’s mind when he’d returned to visit--let alone giving Nova an astronomy lesson--but he had learned to take such requests from Nova with gusto. His selflessness didn’t seem to stem from the Luminary status, or the prince position, and was instead just a long standing problem Nova had of being a people pleaser; when he showed even the slightest inclination of selfishness, Erik didn’t waste any time latching on to it.

And, well. Not that Erik would ever say it out loud, but it was nice to be the object of those selfish desires.

“Every birthday has a constellation to it, doesn’t it?”

“Something like that, yeah.” Nova’s question drew Erik out of his musings. “There’s a whole map and science to it, but long and short of it, there are sectors a few constellations pass through based on how the world rotates. Some are only visible at certain times of the year, so people will sometimes look to those constellations for influence and guidance.”

He grumbled, mostly at himself. “Eh… not exactly the best explanation I could give for that.”

“No, no, it was fine. I think I follow.” Under the blanket, Nova slipped his hand into Erik’s, lacing their fingers together. “I was just curious if you knew what mine was.”

“Oh--sure. That’s easy.” Erik looked back to the sky. Sure, they had more than certainly reached the point where neither was too scared to hold a hand, but he wasn’t going to find the stars he was gazing for, if he was too busy gazing at the one by his side.

“Let’s see… you’re Larkspur 29th--” Not that Erik needed a reminder for that one. He never forgot a birthday that mattered to him. “--so that gives you the Phantom Cat.”

“You made that one up.”

“No, I know, it’s a dumb name, right? But he has a good story behind him.” Erik pointed westward. “This time of year you can usually see his tail, but it might be too far gone for Gondolia now.”

Nova leaned over where Erik pointed and squinted, and Erik did his best not to think about how sweet Nova looked in such deep concentration. “Hm… no, you’re right, I can’t see a thing.”

“Figures. If we were out near Lonalulu, we might have better luck.”

“I’ll keep that in mind for next time.” Nova said, and it made Erik immensely proud to know that he was already thinking of a next time. “But, you said there was a story?”

“Yeah. So this man--he died, and then came back as a ghost. But he didn’t keep any of his memories, so he had no idea who he was. He followed a woman that had seen him be killed all around their kingdom to find answers, and saved her life from pursuers the whole night. In the end, he found out he wasn’t the man that died--he was the man’s cat. And he was given the chance to turn back time, and make it so everyone that had been hurt to that point got a new start.”

Nova’s hand in his twitched slightly.

“...What did he do?” He spoke softly now, caught up in the story.

“The cat took the chance. He went back ten years, and was able to get everyone a happy ending.”

Erik squeezed Nova’s hand. It wasn’t hard to figure out what had suddenly gotten into him. “Hey. Are you alright?”

“Yeah, I… yeah.” Nova raised his free hand, and brushed away at his bangs awkwardly. “Similarities are just striking, is all.”

There would always be things Nova couldn’t explain about the Lost Lands. Erik knew that, and he knew it was a miracle that Nova had been able to explain what he could to him at all. With all the memory bleeds and faintest notions of deja vu, there would always be a level of detachment between him and what Nova saw and felt. And it was no one’s fault, of course. But it was frustrating all the same to Erik that there was only so much he could do.

Nova seemed to pick up on this--he always had a way of reading Erik like a book, and he leaned back on his shoulder, content to stay there this time. “Really, Erik, I’m alright. Keep talking.”

“Keep talking?” Erik repeated. “About what?”

“Other constellations.” Nova looked up at him through long lashes. “You’re handsome when you know what you’re talking about.”

“Oh?” Erik lifted up his hand, still holding Nova’s, and pressed a kiss to the back of Nova’s hand. He smirked against the skin. “So, I’m handsome all the time, then.”

“I mean, I’m not the one that said it,” Nova shrugged, “but yes.”

“Flirt.” But it was another slip of greed out of Nova, and another reminder that Erik really was wanted that much. It was a great boost to the ego, and a pool of warmth in his chest. “Alright, alright. Which one now?”

“Mmm… what about yours?” Nova asked. “The constellation you were born under. Do you know that one?”

“Sure. Should be able to spot her now, too.” Erik turned back to the night sky once more, looking up and around the crescent moon. “From where we are, she should be… ah.” He pointed southward of the moon. “See that line of stars right there? That’s the violin of the Moon Princess.”

“Oh!” He felt Nova sit a little bit straighter against him; it never got any less cute to see the Luminary act like an excited kid. “Yeah, I see it. Is she the Moon Princess because she’s always by the moon?”

“Got it in one. I’m very proud.” Erik reached over to pat Nova on the head without looking; he missed somewhat, patting Nova on the forehead, and laughed when his arm was batted away. “She’s never too far away from the moon when she’s in view. It ties into her story.”

“What’s her story?”

“Are you sure you wanna know? It’s a little sad.”

“It can’t be anymore sad than how I just made things.” Nova spoke very frankly, an air of sarcasm Erik had come to know as just a Cobblestone standard, and that he wasn’t going to get a word in edgewise.

“Fine, I’ll give you that one. It’s bittersweet, more than anything--I did always like it, though.”

“I’m all ears.”

“Don’t I know it.” Erik leaned back against the sofa, and closed his eyes as he recounted the story. “It starts out with a thief--”

“The best stories always do.” Nova cut in, and Erik could hear the smile in his voice so clearly it made him smile too.

“Shut up.” There was another gentle push, but careful not to disturb the gondola. “The thief’s missing father was an art forger, and the thief made it his mission to steal the forgeries, and replace them with the real paintings. One night after a theft, he met an orphan girl. She’d been left on a church doorstep as a baby with only a violin and a song, and she was certain that the song would lead her to her mother.”

Erik waved his free hand nonchalantly, caught between telling this story in full and leaving some mystery behind for Nova. Nova liked mysteries. “I can’t go into all the details, it’s a novel in its own right. But the girl turned out to be the Moon Kingdom’s missing princess, and the thief helped reunite her with her mother, and saved the kingdom in the process.”

His hand clenched into a fist, dramatically, before he let it fall back to his lap. “But, the bittersweet part. The thief and the princess fell in love, but the thief still hadn’t found his father, and he left the Moon Kingdom not long after the princess returned home to keep searching. But, he said he’d always be listening when she played, so she played her song on her violin from then on, as a way to guide the thief back to the moon and to her one day.”

Erik sat up a little straighter, and pointed ahead, past the Moon Princess. “The thief is a constellation, too--Crimson Caper, I think the name is? I’ve heard it varies--and he shows up right around there, but he rotates on a different sector. He and the Princess only line up a few times throughout the year. So, sure, it’s still sad, but…”

He shrugged. “I dunno. It was always comforting to think that the song works, in a way. No matter how far the thief is from the Princess, he always makes it back. It… it’s nice.”

Nice, Erik thinks, and fitting. Maybe horoscopes had a grain of truth to them after all.

Beside him, Nova shifted. Erik felt his head lift up from his shoulder. Must have been a crick in his neck, probably. “Ah, sorry--did I ramble on that one, or…”

The words died on his lips when he looked at Nova--Nova, who normally looked so unshaken, so reserved, was staring at him with wide, almost hesitant eyes, and lips that wavered like he was trying to speak but couldn’t find what to say. He got this look on occasion, Erik had noted long ago, this face that you could look at and just tell there was so much going on than Nova wanted to admit.

But from the way Nova’s hands clenched at his like a lifeline, it wasn’t very difficult to determine what was going through his mind.

“Erik…” He said his name so softly, so sweetly, if Erik hadn’t known better he would have thought he’d imagined it. “Can I… can I be greedy? Just for a moment?”

Nova sounded like he spoke out of line. Like Erik would tell him ‘no’. Like his being greedy wasn’t something Erik so desperately wanted of Nova, for them and for himself.

“You don’t have to ask twice.” Erik said, and the sensation of Nova’s hand sliding into his hair was all too perfect.

It was far from the first time they had kissed--if Erik was going to brag, he’d say that for two people that never had before one another, they had gotten pretty good at it by this point. As if they’d done it a thousand times before. It felt heavier now, though; the story of the Moon Princess must have resonated with him, because Nova’s lips moved against his own like a desperate prayer, his body pressing against Erik as much as he could for as long as he could. And Erik knew full well why.

When they returned to Dundrasil, in a few days time, he would be leaving with Mia again. Erik had promised her so much, and he knew that Nova knew that, and he knew that Nova would never stand in the way of that, but Erik also knew himself. If Nova asked him to stay, let that one selfish desire escape his lips, Erik would do it.

And how could he not? How could he find it in himself to deny Nova, someone who never asked and only gave? Someone who did not ask for the impossible tasks given to him, but performed them anyway, so no one else had to? Someone who stood by his side through thick and thin and all that glittered, whose one selfish choice was Erik above all else? This man, this treasure, this star, this Erik didn’t know what to call him anymore, this gift of a person he couldn’t help but lo--

A creak on the gondola tore them apart with a jump. Erik had one arm propped against the canal wall, while the other, now fisted in Nova’s shirt, pushed him away. Nova was still hovering over him as much as the space would allow, face flushed and lips bruised, but his eyes were wide with a sudden panic. Erik guessed that he didn’t look much different.

“...So,” Erik said, to break the tension, “this makes it six times.”

“Almighty above,” Nova dropped his head with a groan, but Erik saw his shoulders shaking in the darkness. “If I start laughing and you fall in, I’m not fishing you out.”

“Is this all some elaborate scheme to get a Kiss of Life on me?”

“I don’t need an elaborate scheme for that.” Nova wrapped his hand around Erik’s wrist. “Just--hold still a minute, alright? I’ll pull you back.”

It did definitely take a minute--a gondola on the verge of tipping over didn’t give much leeway for sudden movements, but Nova slowly but surely started edging his way to the front of the passenger’s cabin. His hold on Erik never loosened, but it slipped from this wrist to his hand, and soon enough, with one sure-fire tug, Nova pulled him away from the canal, and safely into his arms.

Both of them sighed in relief.

“Are you alright, Erik?”

“Well, I’m not soaking wet, so I’d say I’m just peachy.” Erik fell back from Nova with a snicker. “Definitely one way to sweep me off my feet.”

Nova laughed with him, but it was much more nervous than it should have been. “I’m really sorry, about that. I should have--”

“Oh, don’t you even.” Erik was on him again in a second, clamping a hand over Nova’s mouth. “That’s not something you gotta even think about apologizing for. If you try to apologize for something I would kill for you to do more often, I--” He grasped at words for a moment, but dropped the attempt rather quickly. “--I dunno, I’ll do something, I--”

Nova’s hands came back to his wrist, gently this time, and pulled Erik’s hands away from his mouth.

“I was going to say,” and here, Nova kept his eyes trained on Erik’s hand rather than on his, his cheeks bright red in the moonlight, “I should have waited until we were on land to do that.”

“--Oh.” And that was about all Erik could muster before his own face began to burn.

Nova laughed again--shyer this time, much more boyish and free, and Erik felt his heart flutter in his chest. What a power he had over him, and was only barely aware of. How did Erik get so lucky, he wondered?

“...well,” Erik cleared his throat, and ran his free hand along his neck, “the night’s still young, you know. Should we, ah… you want to head back on shore now?”

He glanced back; Nova’s eyes lit up brighter than the stars above them, his smile warmer than the sun, and his kissed Erik’s knuckles sweetly. “You’d be insulted if I didn’t.”

Seriously. What had Erik done to deserve this life. “Yeah,” he choked out, “so get to steering us back.”

It was with great reluctance--and Erik knew what reluctance from Nova felt like, and it only made him all the more prideful--that Nova let go of his hand, and stood to take the oar. While Erik was more the seafarer between the two of them, the make of gondolas were far different from what he was used to; Nova had only learned by necessity, way back when, but didn’t seem bothered at all with the role of ferryman. It gave Erik time to lay back in the boat, and collect his thoughts.

The night sky still loomed overhead, and every star he could name and all the ones he couldn’t still sparkled as they passed them by. But Erik still looked back to the star he’d found on the earth, like a moth to a flame. And it was the heat of the moment before that had sent his thoughts spiraling, but in this moment of clarity, he could really admit it--he truly would follow Nova anywhere, if the other simply wanted it of him.

“Nova?”

“Hm?”

“You know I would stay.” If Erik didn’t say it now, Nova might not ever believe it himself. “If you asked me to, I mean. I’d stay no matter what.”

For a moment, the oar stilled. An unbearable second passed, and Erik thought he’d gone too far, but he heard Nova chuckle, and the gondola began to move again.

“I know.” Nova said. “Believe me, I know. And… I’m going to ask. One day.”

The implications of that one sentence made Erik’s heart jump in his chest; it was only the lull of water underneath the gondola that reminded him not to jump up himself. “One day?”

“One day,” he repeated, “when I can be selfish enough to ask. But for now… it’s okay.”

“Is it, really?” Erik asked. “You have problems being honest with what you want a lot.”

“You’ve always come back to me before.” While he couldn’t see Nova’s face, he spoke with a gentle assuredness that Erik couldn’t bring himself to doubt. “And I know what it means to have your faith. The least I can do is give you mine.”

He glanced over at Erik over his shoulder. Nova still looked bashful, but there was something in his smile that finally put Erik at ease. “I’ll just miss you everyday until you get back.”

“Aaaaagh.” Erik rolled over on his side, covering his face dramatically. “That was way too earnest, and you’re not kissing me nearly enough to kill me like that.”

Nova laughed like the world had been lifted off his shoulders.

#luminerik #hey this turned out 8 pages long and i'm sorry for that #also thats a lie i'm not sorry for that #nedryn-laughs #panda does a write

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fmdtaeyongarchive · 4 years

Text

↬ do as your heart tells you.

date: january to early february 2020. some time around there.

location: ash’s apartment.

word count: 1,839 words, not including lyrics.

summary: n/a.

notes: creative claims verification. mentions of youngjoo because... yeah. if you thought i would proofread this and/or provide anything of quality, you thought wrong.

it’s been ages since he wrote something truly sweet, or it feels that way to ash. in truth, he doesn’t know that he’s in the right headspace to be writing anything sweet, but he’s supposed to come back in the spring and he needs to give bc something or they’ll give him something and that’s the last thing he wants if he’s to be honest. he knows he can call up one of the in-house producers he’s grown closer to in the past year, but he’s afraid to end up with another “romanticism”. he isn’t embarrassed of that song, but it hadn’t been the song he’d have written on his own, so he resolves to do just that for this one. it won’t be the first song he creates unaided by any measure, but it’s the first time doing it with the sole intent of proving himself in this way.

he starts it with a beat. as his sound has grown more and more inspired by rhythm and blues, ash has discovered how helpful starting with a beat can be. for years, at the beginning of his songwriting journey, he’d begun songs from the point he knew best. this meant creating chord structures based on a piano or guitar instrumental, but he’s a professional now and he doesn’t have a beatmaker simply for appearance’s sake. different songs call for different processes and a hit needs a good beat.

bc has never let him write one of his promoted singles entirely on his own before. they haven’t exactly given him the go ahead yet this time either, but he’s determined to do it on his own. every comeback, he sees the same comments about how his songwriting is an image they’re pushing. as an idol, and the claims that he must not have the skills to do it on his own. it’s not most people, but even a minority claiming that he’s getting credit when his collaborators, the serious professional producers, do all the heavy lifting, nag at his dignity as a songwriter. it’s not that he doesn’t appreciate all of the hard work others put in when he works with them, but, after a while, the comments have begun to get to him too. is he good enough or is he being hard-carried by those with degrees in music production and jobs earned by their skill at song making?

being an idol isn’t defined by being a pretty face alone like so many would believe. ash will argue that until the day he dies. songwriting ability certainly isn’t a requirement. in fact, ash thinks some companies would prefer their idols don’t express interest in the creation of songs at all beyond the performance, but stamping the title of idol onto his job description never sucked dry ash’s love of music and his desire to create it. if anything, being thrown song after song he couldn’t stand only pushed him more into a desire for control over what he’s putting out. he can pretend he’s unbothered by online commentators thinking they know more about the work he puts into one of the few passions he has left than he does, but even knowing he shouldn’t really care, his attempt at indifference had cracked almost immediately.

he’s only playing around at first, not set on the sound he wants for the song. it’s a song that’s supposed to represent the season of spring, though, and he does know what he wants spring to be. perhaps it’s cliche and he should try to avert expectations instead of falling deep into the pothole in the road they are, but, to him, spring is love, new and pure and passionate. following the cold push and pull game of winter, it’s the blossoming warmth of an embrace between new lovers and falling in love with love.

the beat he creates is slow and plodding, a classic accent on the type of slow jam r&b the song heads toward as he experiments with the composition. he lays held chords over it and the instrumental feels lazy in all of the right ways, like a slightly chilly morning spent in bed with a lover as the sun begins to spill in through the window.

it’s a fantasy. that experience isn’t one he has much anymore, not in the way he’s thinking of it. the last time he had, it had been with youngjoo, and what they are to each other… it doesn’t fit the song he’s trying to write.

that’s what he tells himself, and then promptly gets stuck trying to capture the feelings he wants to bring to life. he has a base, but there’s little more to it than that and he needs more than a skeleton to convince bc entertainment that he’s good enough on his own to have their promotion budget put behind the song.

it’s like his brain hits a roadblock and for days, no matter how hard he tries to write, nothing good comes to him. he neglects other songs he’s supposed to be working on and switches up keys and rhythms and a few alterations stick — they’re genuinely better than what he’d started with—, but all he winds up is a slightly different skeleton, not a fully-formed track.

then, he invites youngjoo over one night. he’s been locked up in his studio for days, not seeing anyone outside of the schedules he’s contractually obligated to attend, and he blames that fact and the drinks he has.

“it’s been a long week,” he confides to her, but quickly moves on so as not to lay the exhaustion of his creative block onto her. there’s nothing she can do to help. she has a way with music, but he’s too determined to do it all on his own to ask for help on this song.

she leaves and he finds himself drunk off of more than sweet liquor.

like he’s drawn by a force out of his control, ash’s feet pull him to his studio and he writes and rearranges and records. when he’s sober, he’ll cringe at his attempts at singing, but it’s more work on the song than he’s gotten done in a long while.

the fruits of his labor are there in the morning when he’s tending to his headache with his second cup of black coffee. the night prior isn’t a blur, but it’s not entirely clear to him either. he only recalls what he’d written when he finds the vocal files he’d recorded his lyrical ideas on.

they’re not bad.

and they’re not really about youngjoo, he tells himself. it’s about affection, infatuation, love… and if thinking of youngjoo the night before (that hadn’t gotten drowned out in his intoxication — he remembers vividly how the lyrics had come to be) had helped him connect to the emotions he wants to write the best, it doesn’t really mean anything.

he’d tried for days to write something romantic out of his imagination, but it had all fallen flat. he’d revisited his favorite romantic comedies and listened to his favorite love songs, but wasn’t until he’d spent an evening with youngjoo again that it had come easily to him.

it’s lingering memories of when they’d dated. yeah, that must be it because, yeah, he can admit he feels something for her, but it’s not that much — not enough to make him sound like he’s falling in love, something he hasn’t written much at all about since he’d ended his last relationship.

they’re sleeping together. of course ash feels something when they’re together. he’s never committed to the illusion of complete detachment from anyone he sleeps with. sex is inherently intimate, so, yes, he has words to write about the warmth of her gaze and the rose blush on her skin. sue him.

he goes over the lyrics again and it’s harder to convince himself of his own theory of revisiting past emotions because the words don’t convey distant feelings he can’t connect with anymore. if they were supposed to be far off memories, they aren’t. the fact that he can finish the lyrics sober and without a reminiscent mind is evidence of that. she comes to mind when he tries to re-record himself and it’s not a romanticized version of the past, when she’d been his girlfriend. it’s youngjoo, wearing what she’d been wearing the last time he saw her, with her hair styled the same and the air of ash’s apartment around them.

he ponders it. he can’t help it.

why had it been so much easier to break past the barrier drunk? had he thought he wouldn’t have to take responsibility for the words that came out? had he supposed, in the aftermath, he could blame it all on his delusional drunk mind? had that security blanket been what he needed to figure out the end of the song? because the blanket’s been ripped away now and the self-realization is an odd mix of too cold and too hot.

the words he’d built to flow off the end of the bridge are the ones that cling to him the most. no matter how he tries to focus on other parts of the song, his mind keeps floating back to the one question he’d repeated like an echo at the closing of the bridge section.

do you love me like i love you?

does he love her? drunk, he’d apparently thought he did, but that doesn’t make it true.

love is a scary word now in a way he’d never thought it could be to him. love. he’d said it so easily to youngjoo in such a short time when they’d been together, but that is lifetimes ago now. even when they’d broken up, he’d never regretted confessing the depth of his feelings to her. they’d been true and, if nothing else, he was an honest man who’d given his heart proudly.

the ash he is now isn’t the same. he can’t say it so easily, not when they’re like this and not when the pieces of his worn out heart are kept locked away in cages to keep him from the temptation of gluing them back together again and sacrificing the bloody, beating pulp of himself again to anyone when it’d failed every time before.

does she love him? no, of course she doesn’t. he’d hurt her and now they’re friends with benefits. those benefits happen to include a lot more emotional baggage than sex alone, and ash isn’t detached from reality enough to deny that, but emotional dependency doesn’t make love any more than sex itself does.

it pricks him like thorns in his back and he can’t ignore the feeling that crawls up his spine. it’s wrong to go back into the chorus after a question as earth shattering as that, so, in an impulsive outburst of risky creative decision-making, ash cuts the final chorus.

that’s it.

it will end with a bridge going nowhere. how fitting of the messy, bitter brew of feelings that had turned into a love song.

#fmdverification #&& when you're screaming but they only hear you whisper | self para #&& queued

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starryprose · 5 years

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cruel summer by taylor swift is the perfect anthem for the stevetony that @itsallavengers has in her au “every little thing he does is magic” and here’s why!

i absolutely love the high school au “every little thing he does is magic” by @itsallavengers and i also love cruel summer by taylor swift. the version of stevetony in this fic is interesting and has kept me coming back to catch up or reread since i found elthdim last year maybe? so here’s a quick analysis of cruel summers lyrics and how i feel like it fits to this version of stevetony. (gee i hope you like this haha)

“fever dream high in the quiet of the night / you know that i caught it / bad, bad boy shiny toy with a price / you know that i bought it / killing me slow, out the window, i’m always waiting for you to be waiting below/ devils roll the dice, angels roll their eyes, / what doesn’t kill me makes me want you more.” the line from this section they really stands out to me is “what doesn’t kill me makes me want you more” i think this 100% applies to the scene where tony pushes steve off the bed (effectively accidentally injuring steve) when he hears howard. steve is understandably upset but when he learns about Tony’s abuse at the hands of Howard, Steve supports Tony and this doesn’t lessen his desire to protect or support Tony. In fact, it heightens it. Steve wants Tony despite the bad, which says a lot. Also the bad boy line, Tony is sort of the classic, motor bike and leather jacket bad boy archetype at the start of the fic and steve dives right in, effectively “buying” Tony’s show (although don’t love using buying when it comes to steve and tony bc tony’s character struggles with people buying his friendship/him buying theirs and steve isn’t like that!!)

“and it’s new, the shape of your body, it’s blue / the feeling i got and it’s ooh / it’s a cruel summer / it’s cool, that’s what i tell em’ / no rules in breakable heaven but / it’s a cruel summer with you” the irony of a cruel summer 100% fits this stevetony. They go through phases of being beautiful and free like summer is representative of but also the cruel phases like dealing with the sort of PTSD Tony obviously has with his father + steve still grieving his mother. I also think there claim of there being no rules fits how loose they try to be. They try to relax and have fun and just run with and it is 100% a breakable heaven. it’s like the break of a honeymoon stage which the readers see happen.

“hang your head low in the glow of the vending machine, i’m not buying / say that we’ll just screw is up in these trying times, we’re not trying / so, cut the headlights, summers a knife / i’m always waiting for you to just cut to the bone / devils roll the dice, angels roll their eyes / and if i bleed, you’ll be the last to know.” i think the line of “i’m not buying” and the match with the vending machine fits so well to the high school setting this story takes on. How the lyrics continue into how they won’t try because the times are hard is also very fitting. If i can remember correctly (i need to reread) Tony is very against them at first, especially when it concerns them at school. I think Tony is truly afraid he’ll screw up “we’ll just screw it up in these trying times, we’re not trying” so his insistence is to just not try at all. I think Tony is also always waiting for steve to not want him, to cut him off and it feel like it’s to the bone and hurt hat way (vice versa with steve too), and i think they both don’t want to worry the other with their issues so the last line is fitting.

“i’m drunk in the back of the car / and i cried like a baby coming home from the bar / said ‘i’m fine’ but it wasn’t true / i don’t wanna keep secrets just to keep you / and i snuck in through the garden / every night that summer just to seal my fate / and i scream, for whatever it’s worth, / ‘i love you, ain’t that the worst thing you ever heard?’” I think a lot of the struggle they face is their inability to really believe the other wants them (classic stevetony) and I think Steve also struggles with the reputation Tony has. Steve wants Tony so he’ll deal with it but he doesn’t want to keep secrets, he’s proud to be Tony’s and I think the line about sealing the singers fate fits too. I think both Steve and Tony they’re connected and I think they’ve sealed that fate now and there’s no take backs, for better or worse. The I love you line works too. I think Tony would love to hear it but be insanely frightened by it (i don’t think they’ve said i love you yet pls don’t kill me my memory sucks) but like it creates a seriousness in the relationship that’s intense! and scary! i love you is heavy and it’s occasionally trapping which can be good or bad.

“he looks up grinning like a devil” okay sorta mischievous steve but i just picture steve in tony’s lap on the roof on his birthday and Tony just grinning up at him all charming and just pure Tony and this line just loops in my head for that scene.

This is basically the end of the song (it repeats the chorus and the last verse but my analysis remains the same!) I hope I did justice to my thoughts and you enjoyed this ramble if you read it. Gee, if you read this thank you so much for your wonderful contribution to the fandom and thanks for reading this if you do! I hope you agree somewhat and if you don’t no harm no foul haha, just wanted to share some ideas! Thanks for reading!

#stevetony #stony #steve rogers #tony stark #itsallavengers #every little thing he does is magic #highschool au #tswift7 #cruel summer #superhusbands

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verobatto · 6 years

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"You loved me, but in your heart there's something else before me."

How season 14 is Foreshadowing the Destiel talk

Hello my dear fandom, I rewatched properly the last episode, and I have to say... Many things had been written... And I was looking for Cas again... And hell yeah he was everywhere again!

This is another romantic post bc the last episode was talking about love all the time WRONG TOXIC LOVE AND TRUE AND REAL LOVE.

Let's see...

The talk? The moves?

Ok, we had innocent Jack asking this two question, he is ignorant about flirtation or love, so he is there with the best teacher: Dean Winchester.

This two questions caught my attention bc is reflecting what we were waiting since season 12 and more in season 13 to happen: THE TALK and THE MOVES.

The last episode (Nightmares Logic) we had Mary mirroring Cas all the time, and this particular conversation with Sam about how to talk with AUBobby. So I was thinking, are they Foreshadowing a real Destiel talk? And now after watching this episode I must say... Yes. They are.

This two specific terms... THE TALK and THE MOVES, are two things that Dean and Cas should finally do. But... What is blocking them to do it? Ok.. let's find out...

Dean thinks Cas doesn't love him in that way.

Gif credit @archangelgabriellives

And this fe

Gif credit @littlehobbit13

I had to put all this entire scene bc... Ok look at this, that's what Dean thinks about how Cas feels about him... Why he thinks Cas doesn't love him in the same way?? CAS already told him he loves him, but it was confuse, that time in the barn it was confused, Cas didn't get the words wrong but the attitude, he said "I love you" to Dean and immediately he turns to Sam and Mary and said the same line, SO DEAN THINkS CAS LOVES HIM AS FAMILY.

Since then, we had increased and failed intentions of talk. Dean closed more inside, repressing more and more his feelings, showing the "no homo" attitude he always had with Cas. And the fears.

Son in this scene we see how innocently, Jack describe the way Harper looked at him, "She was looking at me with those googly eyes" and Dean trying to cut "that crap" bringing reality to the topic "She is not in love with you" and "That's not how it works."

... this isn't enough to Dean. To Dean LOVE IS MORE THAN THAT. Love is DEEPER, AND CRAZY, AND SUFFERING, AND HAPPINESS, AND AND... Damn...

Dean is accepting he's in love. That he loves a man, Cas. He is in knowledge about this. He is learning to live with it... But he's struggling all the time inside beacuse of this, so things like googly eyes, or like hooking up (as Roweena and Gabe did) or even he hooking up with random waitress... "That's not how it works." He's talking with authority here, bc he knows what is truly love someone. And the following scene here...

Gif credit @mishalocked24

... he is showing us a lot but... Did you stop just a second to see... How Dean is talking about the "L" while smiling (thinking about his love) with that goofy smile that we make when we think about our love interest??

HE IS TALKING ABOUT THE "L" WORD PEOPLE!!!

And he is saying that Love is crazy, being in love is to be crazy, is loosing control of yourself, is doing crazy things. You are not thinking bc you are crazy for that person. He's the professor here, my friends.. he is TALKING ABOUT THE L WORD BC HE IS ACCEPTING THE LOVE IN HIS LIFE. THE LOVE HE FEELS FOR CASTIEL.

Harper as a mirror of Dean's journey in love.

"She is bad luck."

Ok, when I heard this, I said, this is Dean. Is Dean!! He feels HE IS BAD LUCK BC EVERYTHING HE TOUCHES IT BREAKS. Every single person that came to his life, that was part of his family, died. As Crowley said once.. he is bad luck. ANOTHER IMPEDIMENT TO SHOW HIS LOVE AND TO TALK ABOUT IT WITH CAS. He feels he doesn't deserve this, bc he is bad luck.

After this we were introduced into Harper's department... And it was so so Dean's inner desire of being loved! First of all, there were GREENS COMBINED WITH BLUE IN EVERY WALL. (Dean and Cas) and a red heart, and a legend: "Amore" love in Italian. And a blue couch in front of a red couch. And the bedroom was all in green and on the bed there were stuffed animals, so so innocent look about LOVE, so princess like. Waiting for being loved.

And I thought, this is Dean's head about love. He WANTS TO BE LOVED IN THIS INNOCENT WAY BC HIS HEART IS PURE AND INNOCENT as I said bf in my other metas.

Now... Here comes the spec and the sadness...

Foreshadowing the Destiel talk (again) and perhaps... A possible lovers separation.

"He left? Without you?"

And then I heard Jack saying this meanwhile Harper told him her love story. And I was like... Ok... What is this... And my mind, immediately, run with this...

Gif credit @hunenka

Mary... Mirroring Cas... And Dean saying goodbye to her and wishing her happiness... But this is not all the thing...

Sam was trying to convince AUCharlie to stay in the bunker bc "people needs people", and bc Charlie was sis u're of leave, Sam throws this line...

"Don't go"

So I thought... Another foreshadow!

Then yes we are having foreshadow for the Destiel talk but for a lovers separation too?

Now that I accepted my love for you...

And we had that zombie (Vence) in red too, representing Toxic Masculinity, and wrong love, and old Dean all at once (as was with all the monster we've had so far) and Jack trying to convince Harper that he was her true love. And Dean talking with this zombie telling "This is not love!" Ofc it isn't Dean! So kill your toxicity right now!

And then was Harper again, dressed in green... (New Dean, healing Dean) writing a love letter to her true love (Jack) and I saw this with hope in my eyes... But then i payed attention to the song that was playing...

"We are from differents worlds,

We travel for two differents path,

You loved me but in your heart

There's something else before me.

If we can't live together

Is better to live separated.

You'll go your own way, and I'll go mine.

The two of us starting from zero."

Sorry if the lyrics are wrong I translated from Spanish to English but the message is the same and it's clear... It talks about two lovers that must be apart... And IDK why yet but something is telling me that, there will be a Destiel talk... A blow out and a goodbye, be happy scene...

I hope this isn't going to be for ever... And just some episodes bc we need Dean and Cas to be happy, but if they are separate from each other... Well... They are not gonna be so...

And this is related too with the TV guide resume from Byzantium (14x08) where Cas goes to Heaven doing an enormous sacrifice... I was talking with @gneisscastiel about this and she has such interesting spec about this!

Ok... This is it my friends... I know, I know... This is a little sad but... Let's be positive and let's imagine Destiel becoming canon through this! Awwwww I need so much a huge and strong Destiel scene!

Oh! Aaaand all the parallels with the first encounter with Cas will be written in other post!

I like to put my ideas I diferentts meta and focus one by one! But I think you already know that. 😉

Ok... Tagging some friends here..

@emblue-sparks @mrsaquaman187 @magnificent-winged-beast @cheerstofandomfamily @evvvissticanteand everyone who wants to discuss!

Buenos Aires, Novembre 17th 2018 2:23 AM

#destiel meta #destiel #mirrors and parallels season 14 #14x06 meta #14x06 meta spec #the destiel talk #dean working his traumas #cas isn't there that's is why he's everywhere #dean loves cas #cas loves dean #i need some destiel in s14

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boratanical · 5 years

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loona x their relationship with color

a lot of loona theories dealing with color talk about how the colors relate to each other rather than how they represent the member so heres a more in depth look into the color’s psychology ! a lot of times, colors will have different associations based on individual experiences and that plays a big part in loona !

heejin - bright pink

bright pink is known to be vivacious and stimulating. bright pink is a more rich hue of the usual pink and we can relate that to heejin’s song being vivid - a song about color and standing out. the mv is filled with very vibrant colors

hyunjin - yellow

yellow has dual associations - positivity and loyalty compared to cowardice and caution. in japan (aka hyunjin’s country), the color yellow stands for courage. in her mv around you, the mv and song talk about how shes trying to find courage to confess to her crush but she constantly cowards away from doing so. even though at the end she doesnt have the courage to approach her crush, she seems hopeful that one day she’ll be able to do so. yellow is a great representation of hyunjin’s duality in which despite her shyness/cowardice, she continues to build confidence and hope that one day she can do it - her storyline shows the positive and negative meanings of yellow

haseul - green

green is the most common color in nature and is often associated with rebirth . the thing is that despite her color being related to nature, her mv is at iceland aka a place with no nature. in the beginning of let me in, haseul says “Deep in my heart, in that dark place/You suddenly entered / Awakening my world” which can mean that Iceland is what her heart originally was before a person (i guess a lover) enters her life and helps her be born again - so maybe after this lover enters her life her heart becomes green (”is now being colored with you”) aka reborn ? also green is the color of hear chakra and it represents a bridge between the physical and spiritual world so maybe its not even a lover but rather another distant version of herself (which is repetitive in loona) is being discovered and shes becoming one with herself ?

yeojin - orange

orange is known to be energetic and it draws attention, just like our maknae !!!! its also known to be a flashy color and give a childish appeal. in yeojin’s mv later, it is similar to hyunjin in which it shows duality of her color. positive associations include being sociable (her multiple suitors) and negative associations include being self indulgent (scenes where multiple items/gifts are shown). another thing with orange is that it helps lift up personal limits, similar to how at the end of the mv she gives the frog a kiss on the cheek despite saying how they shouldn’t rush .

vivi - pastel rose

pastel rose / light pinks are mostly associated with love and romance. lighter pinks are known to have a calming effect and be associated with feminine qualities like softness and nurturance. vivi has the most wholesome mv out of all of the girls in which she is softly crushing on a boy.

loona 1/3

hyunjin, haseul, and yeojin have citrus colors while heejin and vivi have shades of red. overall the colors complement each other.

kim lip - red

just like her debut, kim lip and red are often associated to have power, energy, and are known to attract attention. in fact, red is said to be the most attracted color (like how eclipse is considered to be the most popular solo). red accents on neutral backgrounds are a way to attract attention (which her mv happened to do) and red also symbolizes sophistication which kim lip is often associated with.

jinsoul - blue

blue is a color favored by many people too (just like how jinsoul and sitr are popular). people who are associated with blue often have a need to feel unique and authentic - like how sitr was unique to all of the other loona solos due to edm elements. blue is also known for its ability to relax and stimulate a person at the same time and is called a calm authority which can be seen regarding to the structure and sound of sitr. sitr mentions how at first things are out of control until “You have spread blue” and then they become “standing on top of this night” so maybe the lover/another version of herself in this instance takes over jinsoul similar to how haseul gets taken over by green - but in jinsoul’s case the blue helps her gain authority

choerry - purple

purple is a balance between red and blue - it has the stability of blue (the fun meoldy) and the energy of red (the beat drop after the chorus). the color is known to create a unusual atmosphere and be unique and observant ( like how choerry and mirrors - a weird way of communication and she has to constantly look for/in mirrors). a lot of words that are associated with purple appear in lcm’s lyrics - magic ( Love cherry magic ), imagination (ah ah, Imagine ah ah), special (Our special days start today). also, purple does not appear in nature a lot so anything thats purple is often associated with being rare and delicate - this is the opposite of lcm mv bc at the end everything becomes purple which could represent how shes in paradise because in no other natural way would a purple landscape exist

oec

red, blue, and purple will cause irritation and arrogance if too much of the colors are present aka the produce are strong effect - similar to their girl crush image

yves - burgundy

burgundy is a combination of red (vivi / i know a stretch) and purple (choerry). its a sophisticated color and people who like the color often considered what others think about themselves. they have unconventional thinking and have a desire for being unique. burgundy ppl also are known to be introverted so maybe at the beginning of new yves was alone until she meets a lover/another version of herself that allows her to open up more and gain confidence (The look of you when i open my eyes/ So bright that i couldn’t dare to approach / My heart that wants to be like you / Gets colored, filled with you) . also, burgundy lacks a sense of fun/energy that pink has - so maybe instead of a different version of herself like haseul and jinsoul have, vivi is what brings a new self out of yves. yves later on is seen to have a god figure (with the members and orbits) and burgundy is known to represent high social status !!!

chuu - peach

peach is a charming color (just like chuu). it helps bring courage to yourself (chuu eventually taking a bite out of the apple to be with yves) and help others not to be afraid (helping gowon have a revelation). negative associations include relying to heavily on others and fear of being alone, which we see in heart attack where chuu constantly wants to be with yves. just like how yves has an actual person (vivi) to bring out change, chuu has yves and she ultimately changes her (”Dipped you inside my white heart, and made it red” - burgundy has red in it so yves turns her heart to a lighter shade of red since her heart is originally white which can result in a muted color like peach or even a similar color to yves’ lover which chuu wants to be)

gowon - eden green

in the first part of one and only, gowon is seen to be in the dark/hiding but she eventually becomes one with herself/has love for herself and she becomes overall lighter. similar shades to eden green like aquamarine and turquoise are associated with a release of guilt. in gowon’s case, she feels held back until she eventually comes to turns that only she can make herself better and this can represent her release of guilt (the guilt of holding herself back?). other meanings of the colors include being able to heal through play, being childlike, and being denied what we want because we dont work hard enough. based on her mv, maybe gowon felt like she wasnt trying hard enough to improve herself which resulted in a guilty feeling and eventually she realizes that only she can cause improvement in her life and she eventually becomes healed and can now enjoy herself. or rather then not working hard enough, shes trying to protect herself from getting hurt (another association to the color) and as a result she shields herself away from everything. once she connects to her spiritual self (turquoise is known as a color that connects to the spiritual world), she can finally enjoy herself. some other fun stuff is that turquoise represents friendship (yves, chuu, and gowon running together at the end of the mv) and that burgundy is considered the opposite color of aqua and that burgundy is used to balance out aqua (yves going to gowon and crowning her).

olivia hye - gray/silver

gray is a cool, neutral balance color that represents a lack of emotion. its associated with loss, unsettling feelings, and being timeless (”They say that time heals / Even those words became pain for me” but if gray is timeless that means olivia hye doesnt have time to heal oooh snap) . gray is also a color that represents conformism - having no personality (which is seen in love4eva). people who like gray often try to protect themselves from the world around them and prefer a safe and balanced existence. silver has a mature sense of justice and often reflects energy back to where it came from - we can see scenes of the egoist mv being bright pink (known to be a fun color but is reflected back to represent anger for olivia aka the first betrayal) and for some of olivia hye’s scenes in love4eva turn red (olivia hye suffering from the other girls leaving her aka the second betrayal) - this is why an individual’s experiences are significant in the portrayal of color in their life!!

yyxy

all of the girls’ colors are a combination of colors which could symbolize how 1) they need each other to be who they are or 2) their fates are intertwined

#sorry if their are grammatical errors or if the wording is weird i get tired of typing after 5 minutes and this took me like an hour :)#tbh i think i forgot a lot of stuff i initially wanted to say but oh well #loona #info #theory time

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