#bc i dont want to be hypocritical in that. i purposefully usually speak in a way where i make myself overly clear and

[inf1nyxw0rlds]

i love complexity. except of course if it's about me . hope that helps

#transmission #what i mean is i love acknowleging nuance and intricacies but i hate when i cant neatly compartmentalise myself #i want to know WHY im xyz! a distinct reason! and etc #i was thinking deeply the past few days on why i suddenly got so mad bc i do Not usually talk that way publicly #bc i dont want to be hypocritical in that. i purposefully usually speak in a way where i make myself overly clear and #try to avoid making people feel ashamed in any way. because i KNOW how it feels right #but digging further i think its like. its a rage inducing cycle of mockery in the infinite fandom. the normies make fun of the weirdos #and the weirdos make fun of the normies because hey fuck you too. and ppl who enjoy infinite casually arent inherently wrong #but when they fill the tags with complsints and criticisms on a source material they havent delved into much #it irritates a lot of the people who HAVE because while an opinion is fine critiquing something seriously does mean understanding it #on a bit deeper of a level i think? #and thats what always got me personally #but we just have this system of you suck youre wrong and i think its also because infinite has taken so much shit that #we are VERY protective and defensive. like yeah if people spend years ripping into the thing that you like that happens #idk in just pondering. the ponderer... #i like to analyse not just fiction but how ppls brains work in general and irl stuff #mostly personal dissection bc im obsessive about myself. not in a fun way but more an endless interrogation and rumination way #the disorder fr #not wanting to hurt ppl and make them feel judged bc you know what its like vs carthasis of dunking on ppl who dunk on you #thats what i think it is for me #one of the reasons i wasnt posting for a long time was caring too much abt other people so if im getting the itch again #im gonna keep an eye on it #anyway