three things i have found out about connor tonight:
1. he can’t stop working at the DPD. not won’t - can’t. He has to be a detective, he has to have something to investigate and solve, he has to have some curiosity he’s chasing. it is his favourite thing to do. it is his first choice. it is his true north.
2. he provides training on working-with-androids for other law enforcement agencies and precincts around the US. one of these precincts (NYPD?) gave him a thank-you gift of a silver pen with his name engraved on it. He really likes it. Connor has it with him in the breast pocket of his jacket. it is his primary pen. you can should ask him about it, he is happy.
3. he’s nervous about being asked to let go of something he likes (detective work) in order to have something else he likes (having relationships/being involved at New Jericho). he won’t can’t do it. he’s not going to ‘come around’, he’s just who he is and he can’t stop that. he thinks about that sometimes, about the way it feels almost... expected of him, that he quits and becomes ‘one of them’. it’s... cold, to think about.
This movie was a big deal in the 60s and I'm the only person I know, aside from my parents, who have seen it and like it.
Looking at it through 2020 eyes, it's a big eeeek on some of the things (animal collecting), but honestly… the movie came out 60 years ago, like, I'm not going to be mad that things were different. I'm just going to enjoy the movie.
John Wayne is a guy who "collects" animals and sells them to zoos. Already you're like, hmmm, seems cruel. Also – I'm pretty sure zoos don't operate like this anymore; that animals aren't taken from the wild to populate the zoos. My understanding is that all the animals are now bred in captivity and wouldn't survive in the wild. I'm not going to be all hard on zoos, is what I'm saying. In modern day times, zoos do a lot of good things.
But in the 60s they were still "collecting" animals in Africa and shipping them to zoos, so that's what this movie is about. They aren't cruel to the animals, if that helps?
John Wayne is the big star, and Red Buttons is the comedic sidekick (you know, Red Buttons from The Poseidon Adventure). The cast is pretty international, in that it's not all Americans – the other main blonde guy is German, there's a hot French guy, one of the women is Italian and the other is French, and the other older male character is meant to be Native American – and they call him "Indian" affectionately – but I don't know how accurate that is.
Honestly, I'm going to give this movie a pass on a lot of things because it's literally 1962 and I feel like it could be worse.
I'm also pretty sure some of this was shot in Africa, some of the scenes are clearly on a backdrop/early green screen kind of a deal, but then there's footage that I'm pretty sure must have actually been filmed in Africa. And yes, I've just googled it and they filmed this in Tanzania so there you go!
Also some other interesting facts (to me, because nobody else has seen this):
The actors did all their own stunts (i.e. wrangling the animals) – I actually wondered that when I watched the movie;
The ranch they stayed in was actually owned by the German actor in the movie (Hardy Kruger);
The French actress who played Brandy taught herself English on the set (and sadly killed herself at the age of 36, which was a sad fact to discover);
All of the animals were untrained and wild, and caught for the purposes of the film;
John Wayne is really sitting on the front of the car during the chase scenes;
They had real encounters with the wildlife while they were filming in Africa.
So the plot is basically this – they're enlisted by the zoos to "collect" animals and ship them around the world. They've got this big ranch sort of a thing where they all live, and it's surrounded by animal pens. A lady photographer turns up to take photos of them in action, and John Wayne reckons she's a bit of all right.
Basically most of the movie follows them doing their jobs – the plot is more "here's how we catch animals" with a side of romance – and in the middle of the movie Dallas, the photographer, rescues a baby elephant and unwittingly becomes mother to it. She then stumbles across another one, and then a third one, and by this time John Wayne is smitten with her but remaining aloof and at a distance. He's a man, you know. Can't have too many feelings.
The other love quadrangle going on is between the German guy, the hot French guy, Red Buttons and Brandy, the other female character, whose father originally operated the animal collecting business. I personally felt like the German and the French guy had more chemistry with each other than they did with anyone else, and at the end of the movie they leave together, so I'm choosing to believe that they fell in love and spent their lives travelling the world before retiring in a quaint French chateau overlooking a vineyard.
It's kind of a long, sprawling movie with more of a meandering storyline. Brandy hooks up with Red Buttons in the end, the French and the German guy get married in Bordeaux (that's not technically in the film), John Wayne ends up with the fiery Italian, mother of the elephants.
In terms of how the film treats the local tribespeople – I feel like it could be worse? The white people aren't cruel; they employ a bunch of native people at the ranch and they have respect for the local tribespeople. It's less imperialism and more "hey we all get along with each other". There's no racism or derogatory language or anything like that, which, considering the time period, is a good thing.
Would I recommend this movie? Look… it has moments of greatness. The baby elephants racing through the town searching for Dallas while the Baby Elephant Walk plays is great. John Wayne is very likeable in this role. There's a budding gay romance (THEY LEFT TOGETHER IN THE END. YOU WILL NOT CONVINCE ME OTHERWISE). If you're a fan of older movies, then sure, give this one a go. It's kind of a sprawling epic, if that makes sense. There's not a lot of constant action but there are sequences that are really great.
I grew up with this movie so I love it, but YMMV, and that's okay.
Had a dream I was in a band camp or whatever and we were all playing these recorder pipes (recorders, but with a couple more pipes), and this one irritating kid tried showing off by playing baby elephant walk. I responded by playing at least 50% more, plus the other parts.
At any point notice how a child just abruptly sobs for reasons unknown? What's more, following giving him a pacifier, he goes to his quiet and sweet state. Pacifier Clips for Babies in Pennsylvania have been tackling its work of conciliating children everywhere on the world and saving guardians a decent arrangement of time on the best way to quiet their infants. It has a cool quieting impact when children suck on them. It isn't in every case genuine that infants longing for to be taken care of by bosom or by bottle are eager. They simply love the calming and mitigating impact of it.
Pacifiers are amazingly helpful particularly when utilized related to pacifier cuts. With pacifier cuts, there is no requirement for pacifiers falling on the floor and getting all filthy. Previously, guardians need to get them and wash them each time they fall. Children likewise will in general move or change their positions while resting in bed or their dens which makes them drop out of their mouths and be moved under the cover or a cushion.
Pacifier cuts guarantee that they are safely joined to a child's attire. No seriously halting when driving in light of the fact that the infant's pacifier dropped out and on to the rearward sitting arrangement. Pacifier cuts come in various plans and tones. This assortment adds to the appeal of this item. Ties are made customizable long for the infant's solace. They may even be joined to the bunk, rocker or bouncer. Pacifier cuts additionally give guardians, loved ones a smart thought for blessings during submersion or child showers. Blessing providers can even have the clasps customized which will unquestionably win the enjoyment of children and their folks. They are viable, valuable and moderate. Guardians don't have to burn through their time and cash on losing a decent pacifier on account of these clasps. They add life span to them by keeping them set up and unaffected - liberated from falling on the ground and the damage soil and microorganisms can cause to infants.
Guardians should ensure that the pacifier cuts are safely appended to the child's dress. Squeezing an infant's skin will destroy the entire motivation behind utilizing pacifiers and their clasps. They ought to guarantee that the clasps just as the pacifiers are perfect, liberated from earth and in great working request. Pacifier cuts spell solace for children and guardians. Indeed, even a short walk around the house or in the recreation centre will be appreciated more as a result of this valuable and viable infant embellishment.
@selfindulgenz was requesting to see Bay Raph’s reaction to finding out what Bay Leo did to Rise Raph! While I couldn’t find a good place where this could fit in the main story, it’s too good of a premise not to write! @digitl-art-monstr @errorfreak88
Raph couldn’t believe it. Leonardo had told him everything and with such sincerity in his normally sarcastic tone that it sparked the slightest bit of doubt in Raph. Leonardo was a jerk sure— a pushy, entitled brat who was used to getting his way— but he wasn’t a bully! He wouldn’t torment a kid just to prove a point! Would he…?
“Hey Fearless Leader!” Raph threw a tennis ball at his leader.
Leo caught the ball from where he was reclining on the pizza couch, and then looked to Raph with ice in his blue eyes. “What?”
“What’s this I hear about you throwing your weight around with the other Raph?” Raph stood tall, fixing his posture to appear even bigger as he towered over his brother.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Leo stood to leave.
“I’m sure you do.” Raph blocked his path. Leo’s reluctance to acknowledge Raph’s question was proof enough for the box turtle. Any time Leo was called out on anything, his go-to was always playing ignorant. Most times, he didn't even have to pretend. “See, baby blue out there says you antagonized his brother into throwin’ a swing atchya.”
“Why would I do that?” Leo walked away so Raph couldn’t see the guilt in his eyes, going over to the weight room. Raph persued him.
“I don’t know.” Raph said, blocking Leo’s path and forcing the leader to look at him, if only for a few seconds. “Why would you?”
Once Leo’s eyes met Raph’s, it seemed neither brother were willing to be the first to back down. Both went silent, each trying to outlast the other before Leo finally relented.
“Their brother is dangerous, Raph. I was trying to protect us.”
“How?” Raph snarled, his lips pulling back to flash the yellow of his teeth. “By terrorizing a kid?”
“By testing the limits of a dangerous creature.” Leo stepped forward until he was almost nose-to-nose with Raph, testing him just as he had with Raphael.
“Creature…?” Raph let his guard down for a moment before growling and shoving Leo hard. “YOU’RE CALLIN’ HIM A FUCKING ANIMAL?!”
“As long as he acts like an animal, he’ll be treated like one!” Leo growled, shaking off Raph’s shove and pushing his brother back. Raph hardly moved. “If he lashed out at me, imagine what he could do to Mikey! Or to Donnie!”
“They wouldn’t provoke him like you did!”
By then, they were basically butting chests like bull elephant seals fighting over turf.
“Kid or not, that Raph is a monster—“
Before Leo could say another word, Raph slammed his fist down hard on Leo’s cheek and sent the smaller mutant reeling from the blow. Leo fell back until he met a wall, his eyes wide as he stared at Raph in disbelief.
“Don’t you dare use that word!” Raph growled, the green of his eyes like cutting ivy digging thorns into Leo’s flesh. “Don’t you ever…”
Raph backed out of the room, never once turning his back to Leo.
Request: A fic where to everyone it's absolutely obvious they're twins except to Yoh, and Hao is just utterly exasperated that Yoh has never figured this out on his own and he has to be the one to confirm it.
The first time they met Hao was at the airport before they left for America. No one really paid much attention because Hao came in throwing punches and Ren was busy feeling insulted. Still something nagged at the back of Horohoro's mind.
On the plane Horohoro took a chance to peek over the back of his seat at Hao. Hao waved and Horohoro glared as his eyes narrowed in suspicion.
“Hey,” he poked Ryu, “Yoh and Hao.”
“The chief?” Ryu asked.
“He looks just like Hao right? I'm not crazy.”
Ryu chanced a glance back and agreed.
“For the love of god what stupid idea are you concocting now?” Ren asked walking past them to sit down.
“Doesn't Hao look like someone we know,” Horohoro prodded.
“He looks like an asshole,” Ren began before humoring them and taking one look at him. “Shit.”
“Hey, Yoh,” Horohoro whispered leaning over his seat, “Do you have a twin?”
“No,” Yoh answered confused. “You already know I'm an only child.”
“Okay but why does Hao look exactly like you.”
Yoh turned in his seat now too and looked at Hao who waved with a big grin.
“I mean we have brown hair and brown eyes but so do a lot of people. That doesn't mean we look alike.”
Ren smacked his face while Horohoro gawked.
The next time Hao was brought up was when Lyserg had joined. Yoh had left the table to use the restroom while Lyserg leaned in to talk to the other three.
“This sounds wild,” Lyserg started, “and I haven't gotten a good look at Hao since he was six, but don't you think Yoh looks just like him?”
“Yes!” Horohoro exclaimed.
“It's pointless,” Ren scoffed. “Yoh doesn't see it so we're all stuck with a fire obsessed elephant in the room.”
“Oh,” Lyserg responded not expecting that answer, “And you're not worried?”
“Yoh attracts all kinds of people to him so whatever the hell the Hao situation is we'll have to deal with it regardless of if he was his look a like or not,” Ren explained.
“He just can't not help people,” Horohoro stated. “You show him a bad person and as long as he can see spirits Yoh is going to fix them. He hasn't said it yet but that's exactly what he's going to do with Hao.”
“What if this is all some elaborate plan concocted by Yoh and Haa,” Lyserg tried.
“Yoh's too honest,” Ren cut that train of thought off. “He honestly doesn't believe he looks anything like Hao.”
Lyserg sat and stewed over the information as Yoh returned to the table.
The next time Hao was brought up was when they were outside Mesa Verdede.
“My apologizes, Yoh-sama,” one of Hao's followers spoke, “I hadn't realized how striking the resemblance was until now.”
“Huh?” Yoh answered, confused.
“He's saying you look like Hao,” Ren clarified.
“But I don't,” Yoh answered, slightly frustrated, “I keep telling you guys that.”
A moment passes between the five followers of Hao and Yoh's four teammates as they shared in their mutual suffering over how dense Yoh was being.
The next time Hao was brought up was by Anna.
“You're look alike tried to hit on me, but I nailed him with my legendary left.”
“Who?” Yoh asked.
“Hao,” Anna answered.
Yoh sighed, “Not you too.”
“You do know who he is right? Hao Asakura. The founder of your clan. It's only logical you'd look similar. You're family.”
“Grandpa did tell me about him, and I was wondering it that was him, but really Anna I look nothing like him.”
Anna tripled his training for that answer.
Yoh wasn't expecting his father of all people to show up, or to actually sit down and have a meeting with him.
“It's time I tell you everything, Yoh,” his father spoke before launching into the story of his birth.
“A baby couldn't do that, Dad.” Yoh answered not believing him in the slightest. “This is all part of that elaborate joke to convince me that me and Hao look alike. I'm surprised you're in on it too.”
“I've been trying,” Anna gritted out between her teeth, “we've all been trying. For two months.”
“Millions of people have brown hair and brown eyes,” Yoh continued, “It's nothing special. I don't know why everyone's convinced there's something there.”
Underneath his mask Mikihisa's eye twitched.
Hao cornered Yoh one evening before the next round of fights began.
“Yoh what do you see when you look at me.”
Yoh groaned. “Not you too, Hao. Why is everyone convinced we're twins or something.”
“Because we are,” Hao answered, working hard to conceal his thin patience.
“Hao you're a 1500 year old spirit and I'm a 14 year old boy. We're so distantly related at this point.”
It took everything within Hao to remain nonchalant and not clasp his hands in front of him or bring his hand up to his face.
“Yoh,” Hao tried again, “The reason we look identical,” he stressed the word, “is not only that we are identical twins but two halves of the same soul. In essence we are the same person.”
Yoh still looked at him unconvinced.
“Yoh,” Hao sighed grabbing his brother by the wrist and dragging him towards the fountain in town. Once there he held his brother's head firmly as he placed his own next to him to stare at the reflection.
“See,” Hao prompted, and waited as he watched the gears turn in his brothers head.
“I guess,” Yoh relented and Hao released his hold on the back of his head
“Wait then what Dad said was true. They were going to kill me!?”
“You're welcome,” Hao answered. “I saved you.”
“You're the reason I almost died!”
“Get used to is, Yoh,” Hao called behind him as he walked away. “I'm told this is what siblings do. Annoy each other.”
Baby Elephant Walk~Rob Paparozzi~Harmonica
Rob is a Pro Player that has played on Hundreds of Sessions in NY. He Currentely is The Singer for The Legendary Jazz Rock Band 'Blood Sweat and Tears' & toured for several years with Steve Cropper & The Original Blues Brothers Band.
List the first lines of your last 20 stories (if you have less than 20, just list them all).
See if there are any patterns.
Choose your favorite opening line.
Then tag 10 authors you know. I’m too lazy for that so please feel free to do it if you’d like and say I tagged you, I’ll definitely take a look!
1. Jemma wakes in a familiar cage with a familiar face watching her from the shadows. [(waiting here) for a spark to catch]
2. Simmons comes out of the monolith bone thin and pale and, worst of all for a woman as reserved as she is, hysterical. [sins committed in the name of love]
3. Looking up from beneath the water, everything is soft, gold-edged shadows and fuzzy beams of light. [familiar faces]
4. The third time she paces past him, Grant grabs Jemma and pulls her into his arms. [a gift for a lamb]
5. He would sit her in the chair in his office, same as he did the day after she returned from Hydra. [tales of an endless heart]
6. Under normal circumstances Skye would probably tease Coulson about the silly little knock he does on the motel room door. [don't know what was real (or a lie)]
7. From the next room, the tea kettle whistles, nearly lost beneath the sound of Luna’s impression of a bull elephant. [cat lovers]
8. Two seconds in and the Framework already sucks. [the subjective nature of perfection]
9. “Serious question,” Skye says on the way to the boiler room, “can you see the future?” [mysteries (murder and otherwise)]
10. The stillness surrounding Grant is understandable—he was just sleeping, after all—but he’s been at this long enough to recognize the difference between normal, respectful stillness and the more unnatural kind. [took my heart (I think she took my soul)]
11. Once alone in his office, Grant heads straight for the minibar. [harder than a bullet could hit you]
12. “Did you really expect them to welcome him with open arms?” Obi-Wan asks. [fulfillment]
13. Grant slams back against the wall. [a matter of time (chapter 5)]
14. “Ward? Ward!” The comm goes staticky and Melinda can hear a faint curse. [a matter of time (chapter 4)]
15. With LA traffic, they’d be better off getting out and walking, but Simmons is a mess and Grant’s not much better after that fight. [a matter of time (chapter 3)]
16. Afterward, there’s a moment when they’re lying side-by-side but not touching, each of them so deep in their own heads they might as well be in separate rooms—or separate planets. [no escape from the things i've done]
17. The door’s open but, as the only person in the lab has her back to him, Grant taps twice on the door frame before he enters. [pretty glad that you're alone]
18. It’s a shock coming into the infirmary. [and they lived]
19. “You’re beautiful,” Grant says because it’s true, because he can’t help it. [and release]
20. Two hours after they land, Jemma emerges from her bathroom just as Skye is entering her quarters. [written, bound, and etched]
Patterns: I guess I’m impressed that only two of them see someone waking up. I have a nasty habit of opening scenes that way, but I guess my awareness of it is why it doesn’t happen so much here.
And I’m not surprised by how many of these contain action. I have trouble getting into books that ease into the plot - plus this is fanfic, I’m not wasting any of our times on that.
Favorite: I have to choose a favorite? What? But how can I? They’re my babies!
Okay, I think I like this one best:
Simmons comes out of the monolith bone thin and pale and, worst of all for a woman as reserved as she is, hysterical.
Because I very purposefully wrote it so it’d start out canon compliant so you’d be put in mind of her actual canon return home to save myself some wordy set-up there later and then turned it at the end so it’s clear that no, things are different this time. And I’m just very happy with how it turned out. So I guess it wins.
Tagging: I’m still not doing that but if you think maybe you want to I definitely recommend this meme. It was fun and interesting and now I have to go reread some of my own fic because I forgot what happens can.
Summary: After almost three years of marriage, everyone would tell you that Chris and his wife Kelly are the most stable, solid couple they know. But behind closed doors, things are tense as they keep trying for a baby, to no avail. When a secret threatens to shake their solid marriage to it’s core, will they be able to pick up the pieces?
Warnings: major angst, language
I do not consent to have my content, whether it be this story or anything else of my creation, posted by a third party on any other platform other than right here without my permission. This blog is 18+ and is not intended for minors. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Heed the warnings.
*this chapter has been completely rewritten.
One day I’ll wake up and I won’t want to immediately feel like I’m going to die. Today is not that day, apparently.
When I blink my eyes open, the very first thing I see is Dodger’s furry face. He’s laying on the bed next to be with his head on my chest, staring intently at me like he’s been waiting for me to wake up. He does this constantly to Chris and I, and we always find it hilarious.
“Hi, baby.” I whisper, my voice hoarse from all the crying and the whiskey last night. I’m in our bed and to my immense relief, I’m dressed in a pair of soft sweats and a T shirt, which I have no memory of putting on.
After we got back here last night, I went straight to the liquor cabinet and poured us both a drink and put on A Muppet Christmas Carol and cried and bitched and ranted about how much of a bitch my mom was, and Chris just kept quiet and let me vent. At some point I remember almost falling asleep on the couch and Chris nudging me awake, and then....nothing.
I glance over at the nightstand and see that Chris plugged my cell phone in for me to charge overnight and there’s Advil and a gatorade sitting there. I don’t know how much good Advil is going to do since it feels like there’s an elephant sitting on my head, but what the hell.
After peeing and brushing my teeth and hair to at least appear somewhat human, I make my way to the kitchen and stop in my tracks. Lisa is standing at the stove making what looks and smells like french toast and bacon, and there’s coffee brewing. Chris is sitting at the dining room table (after the debauchery that occurred on top of it a week ago, I’m sincerely hoping that Chris went at it with a ton of Lysol) looking like he’d rather be anywhere else.
My fight or flight urge kicks in and I’m two paces into going back into the bedroom when I feel something soft but sturdy hit me in the back.
In a flash, Dodger is at my feet, devouring the croissant that Lisa threw at me.
“Not so fast. Get in here.” Lisa says. The look on her face and the tone of her voice leaves no room for argument. I turn back around and walk into the kitchen, leaning in to give Lisa a hug.
“I’m sorry. I should have called.” I say softly.
“Yeah, you should have. But that’s not why I’m here.”
The food finishes a a few minutes later and I help her plate it up and bring it to the table. Once we’re all seated, Lisa looks from me to Chris.
“So, who wants to tell me what the hell has been going on the past few weeks?”
“Mom-” Chris starts.
“No, save it. Something big is going on, and you’ve been lying to me about it. And I know you’re lying because you suck at it. And Scott knows what’s going on because every time I ask him about it, he looks like he’s about to puke. Now here’s what I know: you guys apparently had a fight. Kelly’s been staying with her brother in the city. I can’t get either one of you to tell me anything, which is a HUGE red flag, because neither of you have ever been shy about coming to me about anything. Now what is going on?”
I lace my fingers together and rest my fists under my chin.
I know this is going to kill Chris. And it’s going to kill Lisa. And it’s going to kill me to have to fucking hear the words come out of his mouth again. And there’s a good possibility that Lisa will kill Chris, or at the very least beat the piss out of him.There’s a whole lot of killing that’s going to happen.
Chris looks at me with such a profound sadness in his eyes that it nearly breaks my heart.
“Just tell her. Get it over with.” I say sadly.
“The reason Kelly hasn’t been here is because......” I watch as his eyes shine with tears and his adams apple bobs up and down in his throat. I close my eyes and try and brace myself for the words that brought my world down a few weeks ago. “I slept with someone. I cheated on her.” Lisa’s jaw drops and she looks to Chris, who’s barely keeping it together and then to me, my jaw clenched tight and my eyes closed.
Seconds pass without a sound. Then a minute. Then two.
“YOU DID WHAT?!”
Her gaze swings to me and I can see her eyes brimming with tears. She reaches across the table and grabs my hand, squeezing it tightly.
“I didn’t want anyone to find out until after the holidays. I didn’t want to ruin anyone’s Christmas.” I say softly.
I watch Chris swallow thickly.
“No. You don’t get to talk right now. You were raised better than this. I raised you to be better than this. I’ve been proud of you you’re entire life, but right now.....right now I’m so disappointed in you I can barely stand it.”
I take my coffee and my plate up to my office on the second floor, not wanting to be there or listen as Lisa lays into Chris. As it is, I can still hear her yelling without hearing what’s being said.
I knew everything was going to come out sooner or later. I just really wished that it would happen after the holidays. Between the disaster with my family last night, I guess it’s only fair that Chris has his turn.
There’s a knock on the door as I’m finishing my coffee, and Lisa opens the door a bit, and I can tell that she’s been crying.
“I don’t even know what to say.” she tells me softly as she takes a seat in the comfy armchair in the room.
“I don’t know if there’s really anything TO say.” I whisper.
“Honey, why didn’t you tell me? Why didn’t you talk to me? You didn’t have to go through this all by yourself.”
I pull my feet up on my chair and wrap my arms around my knees and look up at her.
“I could barely begin to process any of it myself. When he told me, I kind of just went on autopilot. I didn’t want to be alone; part of me was afraid of what would happen if I was alone. I knew that if I went to you or Shanna or Carly or any of our friends, it would all come out, and I wasn’t ready for that. I couldn’t stay here with him. So I fled to Connor’s. I kind of trashed the studio, then just shut down. That’s why Scott knows. Connor called him because I physically couldn’t get out of bed for four days. He came to check on me and laid with me for a few hours. I was ashamed. I AM ashamed.”
“Kelly, the only person here who should be ashamed is my son. He didn’t tell me any of the details, and honestly, I don’t want to know. I don’t know what the hell was going on in his head. I am so, so sorry about everything. I just....I can’t believe any of this.”
A thought pops into my head and I turn to her.
“How did you know I was here?” I ask.
“I didn’t. I had Scott start on dinner for today, and I came over, determined to get the truth out of Chris once and for all, no matter what. He told me you were here sleeping. He gave me the Cliffs Notes version of what happened at your parents’ last night.”
I scoff and roll my eyes. “Yeah, it was one for the books. I just couldn’t be around any of them last night. I just wanted to be here, at home.”
“What about now? Where do you want to be now?” Lisa asks.
“I don’t know. I’m so sorry for all of this happening on Christmas. I hate feeling like the holiday is ruined. I hate that you and Chris are fighting. I hate that Scott and Chris are fighting. I just wish we could have a nice Christmas and just pretend that everything is normal.” I tell her.
She takes my hands in hers and rubs them, warming them up.
“If that’s what you want, that’s what we can do. God knows I could wring Chris’ neck right now, but it’s Christmas. If you think you can handle it, and handle everyone, we can do it. I’ll hold everyone off on the questions for today. But you know eventually.....you and Chris are going to have to sit down and talk.”
Summary: A car crash not only lands Dean Winchester in the hospital with a leg broken in three places but brings him face to face with the one who got away.
Warnings: Language! But it’s pretty vanilla considering I’ve used more colorful terms in my other works tbh. Bitch!Lisa makes an appearance in this and that’s a warning in itself.
Genre: It’s angsty but its it’s also fluffy... hurt/comfort?
This fulfills the “Hospital!AU” tile on the @spnmixedbingo #spnmixedbingo2021 card!
[ Masterlist ]
Word Count: 3336 words
In retrospect, immediately trying to hop out of a hospital bed after waking up feeling like a sack of shit wasn’t the smartest of moves... but it’s what Dean Winchester did.
The man groaned, squeezing his eyes shit as pain reverberating from his right leg all the way up his spine and back down, as he lay splayed on the cold linoleum of the hospital floor. In a cast, wearing a polka-dot gown, and without his dignity.
“ Only Dean stubborn-as-a-mule Winchester would try and walk on a leg broken in three places. You, sir, haven’t changed at all. ”
A familiar voice echoed from somewhere above him, forcing Dean to blink his dry eyes and squint up at the source of it. Lo and behold— an angel in baby blue scrubs and a short white coat illuminated by the piercing fluroscent light overhead.
Her [H/C] hair might have changed in length, and her voice might have lowered in pitch just the slightest bit, but those [E/C] eyes had a look in them that was so familiar to the man that it sent a wave of nostalgia followed swiftly by the feeling of sorrow.
“ [Y/N]... ” He ran his tongue over his chapped lips and swallowed to wet his suddenly dry throat but his eyes never left her form. “ It’s... it’s been awhile. ”
And it had been— almost a whole decade, in fact.
Almost a whole decade since they had spoken. Almost a whole decade since the blow-out fight that had ended them.
Almost a whole decade since she left him in the rear-view mirror of her car never to return.
“ It has, hasn’t it? ” The amused smile that she donned just moments prior dulled to a little reluctant half-smile, as she struggled to keep the pep in her voice; something that no one else would have noticed.
But Dean Winchester was not a ‘no one’. Not to her.
“ Come on, let’s get you off of the floor. ”
His skin burned, heart raced, as she hauled him carefully off the floor, arms hooked under his armpits; her familiar scent filled his nose and enveloped him like it always did all those years ago. He didn’t realize just how much he missed the mix of vanilla, roses, and baby powder until he was hit with its full force once again.
“ I thought you were up at John Hopkins. In med school. ” The man couldn’t help the little edge of bitterness that leaked into his voice as he plucked at the sheets agitatedly. To her credit she didn’t flinch at his tone as she busied herself with checking his charts.
“ I’m doing my residency now. The hospital here had a space and I... I came back. Just got back to town a few days ago. ” Looking up from the papers, she chewed on her bottom lip in the way that he knew meant she was contemplating whether to speak or not. “ I was thinking about looking you up but... ”
Dean swallowed once more, eyes drifting down to his hands as he nodded in understanding. Of course she wasn’t sure if she wanted to see him again or vice versa. Things between them ended on rather sour a note, after all.
“ ... It’s great to see you again, ” he murmured lowly, instead of addressing the elephant in the room. She was all to happy to follow suit.
“ You too, ” she replied, cordially. Formally.
God, Dean felt like he was having his teeth pulled. They used to dance with each other, barefoot and wild in the old playground they met in-- and now? Now they just danced around each other.
The doctor-in-training busied herself with tinkering with his IV line— something that he was frankly surprised didn’t tip over when he went splat on the floor— humming to herself distractedly.
“ Do you remember what happened? ”
“ I was... ” he squeezed his eyes shut, pressing the heels of his palms into his eyes only to regret that decision immensely when he put pressure on the bruised flesh “ ... I was in a car accident? Wasn’t I? ” His eyes flew open as he looked to her with a look of absolute horror.
“ Oh, hell, is Baby okay?! ” It wasn’t professional of her by any means, but she just couldn’t help the snort that escaped her.
“ Why am I not surprsied that that’s what you’re concerned about,” she teased with an eye roll, the earlier tension ebbing away. “ Baby’s a tough girl. I’m sure she’ll make it out fine. How would you rate your pain? ”
Dean tried to wiggle his toes and was rewarded with another sharp pang of pain.
“ Zero stars, ” he hissed between gritted teeth. “ Would not recommend. ” She nodded understandingly.
“ Upping your dose of morphine it is, then. ”
Drugging him up, she gently touched his shoulder, leaving her hand for a smidgen longer than appropriate, before dutifully infoming him that he’d probably start feeling kinda out of it and/or sleepy. ￼￼
All the while he watched her, slightly propped up on the two most cushy pillows ever, committing her visage to memory. He struggled with himself, his racing mind, then as the painkiller flooded his system he struggled with keeping his eyes from fluttering shut.
“ ... Stay? ” The word was slurred and uttered so softly that [Y/N] almost missed it. She peered down at the beautiful man, his green eyes shut as his breathing grew deeper. A look that could only be described as heartbreak crossed her features.
“ I can’t Dean, ” she whispered. The scenario was achingly familiar. Clearing her throat she continued. “ I have to make my rounds... But, ” she couldn’t bare to leave things like that. Not again. “ But I’ll be back to check on you soon. I promise. ”
Against the rational side of her mind, she leaned down and pressed a lingering kiss to his forehead and quietly slipped out of his room. Never to hear his yearning plea—
“ ... Please... don’t leave me... again... ”
Almost a week had gone by since she met Dean again and she had kept her promise. When she wasn’t attending to other patients, sitting in on surgeries, or assisting doctors; she was with Dean.
Lawrence was a small town and while it wasn’t like everyone knew everyone else, loads of people knew about Dean and her... and probably what went down. So they pretty much let her alone— even gave her less to do, she had a sneaky suspicion— so that she could spend time by his beside.
She spent so much time just talking with him, watching crappy daytime tv with him, and just generally hanging out with Dean that she was pretty surprised when the first time she ran into Sam Winchester, she wasn’t actually by the older brother’s bedside.
“ [Y/N]? ” The voice was much deeper than she had recalled but the hazel puppy-dog eyes and floppy brown hair gave the tall man’s identity away in a heartbeat.
“ Oh my god— Sammy? ” The resident gasped, quickly placing the clipboard down on the counter she was manning and ducking around it to engulf (or rather be engulfed by) the man in a hug. “ You’re so big now! ”
Sam laughed, squeezing the air from her lungs as he playfully lifted her a few feet off the ground to prove her statement true.
“ It’s so great to see you! ” He stated when both her feet were firmly planted on the ground, eyes nothing but truthful.
It was a pretty slow day at the hospital, so she didn’t see any harm in catching up with her second-favorite Winchester. Learning he was in Stanford Law School definitely sent a rush of pride running through her; even if it was bittersweet.
She never realized when she left that she would miss out on more than Dean. The green-eyed man was her life, but Sam was the kid brother she never had.
She remembered giving him tips when he got his first crush, remembered holding his good hand in the waiting room of the hospital they were stood in when messing around with Dean ended up in a broken arm, and she certainly remembered threatening the boys that bullied him as a weedy high school freshman that if they touched ‘her Sammy’ again, she’d rip their balls off.
Now listening to him talk about how he was living with his girlfriend in Palo Alto, all grown up, she felt that she’d missed out on so many milestones for the man she considered family. But beyond that she couldn’t help but think of Dean as always because in which waking moment for as long as she could remember hadn’t Dean been at the forefront of her mind.
Was he still living in that big house with his dad? The Winchester matriarch had unfortunately passed when they were kids and Dean did the bulk of the raising— both himself and Sammy— while John tried to get his shit together. She knew just how much Sam meant to him and for him to leave mustn’t have been easy on him. Just the thought of that sent a pang of guilt running through her.
She, a snide part of her mind whispered, left him too.
Almost as if he could see the direction of her thoughts, Sam paused in his recount of college escapades to smile, almost wistfully, at the woman he considered a sister.
“ He still misses you, you know? ”
[Y/N] forced a smile, eyes finding the floor particularly of interest in that moment.
“ Dean? Nah... ” A laugh bubbled from her slightly chapped lips, but it was decided of mirth. “ Dean’s always had the pick of the litter. A few years hasn’t changed that grin or that charm so I’m sure that that hasn’t changed either. ”
A handsome, kind, good man like Dean? She was more surprised that she hadn’t ran into a beautiful doting girlfriend or a wonderful caring wife than she was that it almost took a week for her to run into the youngest Winchester.
“ He never wanted the litter, though, ” Sam reminded with a pointed look. “ He proposed to you, after all. ”
“ We were young and— ”
“ — in love? ” Sam interrupted.
“ And didn’t know any better, ” she finished with a look. The bitchface that the man gave her was equal parts nostalgic as it was annoying.
“ I was fourteen but I remember the look in his eyes when he finally saved enough to buy you that ring. It wasn’t puppy love. On either of your parts. ”
His words were dripping with nothing but truth yet the woman paused, shuffling a little in her hospital-issued shoes as she played with the edge of her white coat. Her bullheaded stubbornness frustrated Sam to no end— so he changed tactics.
“ What about now then, [Y/N]? ” Sam questioned, causing her to raise her head. “ What if Dean pulled out a shiny diamond ring and proposed to you right now... can you honestly tell me that you’d say no? ”
She didn’t reply.
Her eyes unintenionally found the door to Dean’s room as she bit the inside of her cheek so hard that it drew blood.
She didn’t say no the first time. How could she say no a second?
“ You should tell her. ”
“ Tell her what? ”
Sam’s bitchface couldn’t get much bitchier as Dean played stupid, eating his chocolate pudding cup as innocently as possible. It incensed Sam to no end.
“ Come on, Dean! God! You too are just as stubborn as each other! ” The law student groaned, wringing his fingers through his brown locks while simply laying it out there for Dean: “ Tell her you still love her. Tell her you want another shot. We both know you do. Hell, I’m pretty sure the entire goddamn town knows you do. ” They likely did— probably why no one said anything about the amount of time [Y/N] spent with Dean while on the clock.
“ It’s not like that— ” Sam’s narrowed eyes at Dean’s insistent denial had the older brother singing a different tune. “ Okay fine! Fine! So maybe I do! Maybe she was and will always be it for me— but, fuck, Sammy, I’m so scared. ”
For once, the tough guy facade that Dean always felt the need to wear slipped before his little brother as he bore his metaphorical guts.
The too-sweet pudding turned bitter in his mouth, as he clenched his jaw, jabbing at it with his spork half-heartedly.
“ I can’t... she...! Not again, ” he set the pudding down as a real fear filled his eyes. “ I can’t watch her leave. I can’t lose her. Not again, Sammy. ”
Almost a decade ago, at the cusp of adulthood, he had thought the acceptance letter from John Hopkins University was the conduit that shattered everything between Dean and [Y/N]. But really? It was Dean’s own insecurity.
The irony of the situation was that she never even applied to the university— a whopping sixteen hours away— but their high school Biology teacher who had put in an application for her, earning the girl a full-ride scholarship to one of the most prestigious medical research universities in the country.
She had wanted more than anything to go, and he knew it. To become a doctor, to help people like her late parents, was her dream. But in his selfishness he overlooked that: her dream, her ambition, even how she was convinced that Dean and her could make things work despite the distance.
So he gave her an ultimatum. One that he regretted ever since the words came out of his mouth—
If you go, we’re over! You hear me, [Y/N]?! Over!
The look on her face was the worst part of it all. The amount of hurt that he inflicted on her, the girl he was a month shy of vowing to love and cherish at the alter... he didn’t know how he’d ever forgive himself for that.
“ Dean— ” the younger Winchester’s pitying tone pulled the elder out of his waking nightmare “— if you don’t tell her, you’ll definitely lose her. Again. ”
With those quiet words, Sam slipped out of Dean’s room, leaving the latter in his thoughts.
After a moment or two of stewing, he realized— hell, Sam was right.
[Y/N] was a catch one that wouldn’t be around forever. The first time he let her slip from between his fingers he barely recovered but would watching her walk down the aisle with another man be any less heartbreaking?
Now she was back in Lawrence, where they began, where he never thought he’d ever see again, so why was he being a dumbfuck with his thumb in his ass?
Pressing the call button, he waited in earnest for his one who got away, jiggling his good leg impatiently as the seconds ticked by. His breath caught in his throat as the door opened slowly and a woman stepped through.
The last woman he expected would come through that door—
“ ... Lisa? ”
“ Just get the hell out of here, Lisa! ”
Dean’s gruff voice was loud and strained behind the door; causing [Y/N]’s hand to pause on the doorknob.
Lisa? Perhaps the elusive wife or girlfriend? But probably not, she reasoned, considering the man just told whoever Lisa was to effectively get lost.
“ You haven’t changed at all, ” the woman she assumed was scoffed. “ Still the same hick-town boy, hung up over some girl that left you’re ass for bigger things— kudos to her! You weren’t enough for her and you sure as hell weren’t for me— ”
“ Excuse me, ma’am? ” [Y/N] had enough of the Lisa bitch, slapping on a tight customer-service smile as she flung the door open. “ You’re distressing my patient. I’m going to have to ask you to leave. ”
Dark haired, toned, and gorgeous, Lisa’s face pretty features were twisted in an ugly scowl as she looked the newcomer up and down. Chancing a glance Dean’s way, she did a double-take when she noticed the look on his face.
Then putting the pieces together— the [H/C] hair, and the [E/C] eyes she recalled the photo in Baby’s glovebox, the almost protective stance the resident took, the lovesick look in Dean’s eyes— Lisa’s arms slipped from the crossed position across her chest.
“ You’re [Y/N], aren’t you? ” The woman asked, half snide, half in disbelief. The other woman frowned.
“ Yes...? ”
“ Hah! What a hoot! ” Lisa scoffed, her rage shifting from the man in the hospital bed to the woman. “ You know years after you left, when he was sleeping in my bed, it your name he sighed? What the hell makes you so special? ”
Eyes narrowing, [Y/N] gestured to the door in an abrupt manner, losing any trace of the bedside manner she was thought in college.
“ Leave. Now. Before I call security. ” Lisa scoffed.
“ Don’t worry. I’m gone! You can have him! ” And with those dramatic last words, the woman exited the room— and their lives for good.
“ Lovely girlfriend you’ve got there, Dean, ” [Y/N] remarked. Dean shrugged, ducking his head in what she knew was embarrassment.
“ Really short-lived relationship. Hasn’t been my girlfriend for five years either so... ” The man swallowed nervously as he snuck a glance at her. “ How much of that did you hear? ” [Y/N] bit her lip, looking down.
“ She was wrong, Dean, ” she murmured, coming to perch on the bed by his side, taking his hand in hers.
“ She isn’t, though, ” the man whispered, not meeting her gaze. “ I am still the same small-town boy you left in the dust. I’m still the same terrified boy who was so scared of losing you that I drove you away, and I am so sorry. So, so sorry. ”
“ Hey, asshole, listen here— ” she scoffed, a little less heat than she usually would’ve but enough to bring a touch of a smile to his lips at the familiarity of it “— you can’t talk shit about that boy. I loved that boy. Loved him enough to agree to marry him. Loved him enough that the thought of him still gives me butterflies. I love that boy, Dean. ”
I love you. The worlds were unspoken but Dean heard it all the same. And like that the weight slipped off of his chest. She still loved him.
“ I’m sorry I left, Dean. I shouldn’t have just left. Not like that. ” He shook his head, gripping her hands so tightly like if he let go she’d simply vanish.
“ No, no, I didn’t mean any of those things. I’m so sorry I, I just, I was— ”
“ It’s okay, it’s okay. ” She pressed a kiss to his forehead, then his cheek, then the side of his mouth. “ It doesn’t matter anymore. ” Beneath her lips, he trembled like a man in withdrawal.
“ You were it for me, [Y/N]. ” He wanted— needed— for her to know. “ You’re still it for me. ”
With a watery smile, she reached into the neck of her shirt, and pulled out a chain with the simple silver ring with a tiny emerald that he bought her all that time ago.
“ You’ll always be it for me, Dean. ”
Unclasping the chain from her neck and slipping the ring off of it, he presented it to her once again— and suddenly they were eighteen years old lying in the backseat of Baby.
“ Marry me? ” He whispered.
“ Yes. ”
If you’d like to be tagged, shoot me a message or drop me an ask!!