#anyway whenever i get my eng mock back that might be a good time to come out

[kagehisanotsu]

Reconsidering The Bra Issue bcos sometimes a sports bra might be nice but also like if I get one while I still live w my family my mams gonna take it as me accepting that I Need to wear bras as like a societal thing... maybe if I throw the transgenderism thing (which she doesnt know abt yet) and the autism thing at her at the same time, shell be so flabbergasted that she'll cave

#like id try 2 ease her into it going 'hey u know how its a known fact about me that i have to wear socks inside out bcos sensory issues.' #'do u know how tight bras are. do u think i could wear a fucking bra inside out. its not working' #and like some chest compression WOULD be nice on occassion both bcos trans and autism #but like im for sure not gonna get that from a normal bra which is what she expects fron me #argh my moms actuslly great n im sure that if i ever did talk to her abt it she would be fine and wed work out an alternative #but also like... confrontation scary.... #im slowly revealing things abt myself 2 my mom bcos i dont wanna spook her and also therss a lot going on in here thatd be confusing #likr when i kept the pcos beard she asked 'is this bcos of trans issues' and i said no #firstly bcos i was like O_o trans issues.... #and secondly bcos like. not rlly? like the gender from the beard is A+ #but i also have it bcos it seems like unwarranted effort to shave it and i like stimming w it #and if i said yes then shed probs chalk up my rejection of feminine social norms as a trans thing. no bestie i just dont care #im well aware that im a bit of a hippy but we go #anyway whenever i get my eng mock back that might be a good time to come out #bcos she always likes reading my personal essays n short stories n shit bcos #'you dont tell me when youre having issues and this is p much the biggest glimpse into your psyche that i get' lol #and for the short story i wrote abt a bigender person in a way thats like. WAY obviously projecting. teehee #anyway