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#anon you sent this literally as i was boarding my plane to Arizona
incesthemes · 1 month
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TW CSA
So I know it’s not implied anywhere but I like to project. Sams demon blood arch and being “dirty” since he was kid resonates a lot with me as someone who has csa. Like you are no longer holy no fault your own and your biggest fear is becoming like them.
the narrative of the show and the general ambiguity of the characters and their backgrounds often lend themselves to alternative readings just like this. the symbolic usage of blood especially allows for interpretations of queerness, rape and sexual assault, incest—things that are generally seen as impurities that make a person dirty and tainted. the thing is inside you and it's part of you and you can never get rid of it. it's not you, not inherently, but it's with you, an inextricable brand on your soul that you'll carry with you forever. blood is equally immutable, inside of you, tied to your essence yet just a part of your complete self. blood represents bonds and relationships. blood kin, blood oaths and sibling pacts, the heart is the source of love and emotion. if the blood is corrupted then so is the self. you've become impure and dirty and you can never remove the dirty thing because it's infected every part of you. it isn't you, but it's in every part of you and when you bleed everyone will know.
it's a strikingly poignant symbol that allows for such varied yet overlapping interpretations, especially in all the ways it's utilized in the show. sam is made impure as a baby; he's not born with it, it's not him, but it's forced onto him and he has to carry that with him forever even though he never consented to that burden. the desire to repent and be good and scrub himself clean is just as resonant: the vain hope to undo what's been done to you and return to a state of innocence even though you can't change the past and you can't retroactively stop what happened. in the end all you can do is become strong enough to carry that weight.
combined with the recurring theme of cyclical trauma and abuse it creates a compelling narrative that strongly resembles CSA. sam may not have been literally sexually assaulted as a child, but the themes and liminality of the narrative generates an anxiety that lets those connections be drawn. the emotions are the same. and that's what stories do: they let us see ourselves through abstracted and symbolic narratives. they let us connect with others through our shared emotional experiences. it's what it's all about.
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musings-of-a-rose · 2 years
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I saw you had requests open and I don’t know if you write for Javi G yet but I had this idea. I’m obsessed with watching YouTube videos of people showing the first class seats of airlines and how everything is so luxurious it’s basically a dream to us normal folk. It got me thinking, what would a fic be like with Javi G and reader flying first class with a top class airline like Emirates? The reader has never flown first class before, always economy, so she is stunned by the private cabin-like seats with closing doors, the Michelin Star food, the private bar, the showers! She feels so out of place in her generic cheap clothes and lack of “posh etiquette” but Javi guides her through it gently and basically makes her feel as welcome as possible
I saw your second ask to accompany this so I'll paste it here:
Sorry, anon who sent in the Javi G first class airline request again! I just found out Singapore Airlines have private first class suites on their planes, complete with a double bed for two people, so now I’m thinking about also joining the mile high club with Javi in an actual bed on an airplane 😱😂 Just look at the luxury https://www.singaporeair.com/en_UK/us/flying-withus/cabins/suites/new-a380-suites/
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First Class Love
Pairing: Javi G x f!reader
Word Count: 6800+ (I GOT CARRIED AWAY OK)
Rating: Mature - 18+ ONLY!
Warnings: Just like ao3, “creator chooses not to use warnings.” If you click Keep Reading, that means you agree that you’re the age to handle mature themes. Also by clicking Keep Reading, you understand warnings may not be complete in order to avoid spoilers for the story. 
Notes: Damn anon - that plane is LUXURY! I’ve never flown first class before either, let alone whatever tier of class that is! I did look into the suites and they aren’t private, meaning they have a little divider door you can close but anyone walking by could easily look over the wall, so to speak. SO FOR THE SAKE OF THIS FIC, THEY ARE INDIVIDUAL ROOMS because I don’t want to have to deal with all of that lol This sort of got away from me and I had this clear mental image of how they met that I just had to write!
Shoutout to @astoryisaloveaffair for beta-ing this. Because I literally couldn’t look at it anymore lol
*If you want to see a pic of the room, I’ve added one at the end!
**If you want to be added to the taglist, join here or let me know!
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“Well this definitely looks interesting,” I say to myself, reading a flier that had been pinned to the board at the hostel. My Spanish has definitely improved since I had started this little self discovery journey and had found myself spending a lot of time in Spain, but it still took me several minutes to make sure I was reading this right:
The Nic Cage Fan Club of Mallorca
Free Screening of Raising Arizona
Friday at 8pm at the Community Cinema, Theater 3
A Nic Cage fan club in Mallorca? Why not? I had finally made it here, a place I had been dying to get to, and I suddenly realized I had nothing to do. I didn’t know anyone here and the people at the hostel all knew each other. I was the odd one out. I like Nic Cage - maybe I’ll meet some friends for the few weeks I’m here. 
Most people graduate with their master’s and get a job. Me? I went to Europe. I got my degree and realized I had no clue who I was without school. Everything I was revolved around getting good grades, writing papers, all of it. I didn’t know me. So I took on some graphic design work, allowing me to work from anywhere, packed and bag, and crossed the pond. 
I’ve been here for about 6 months, 3 of those in Spain. I bounce around, mostly working from my laptop with some of the best views I’ve ever seen, but sometimes I’ll take some part time work as a server or barista, maybe a shophand, just to get to know the people. It doesn’t hurt to have a little pocket money either. 
Mallorca had been high on my list, but I needed to have a little money before heading there because it was expensive. I wasn’t sure if there would be any help needed anywhere, since it wasn’t officially tourist season yet, so I resigned myself to walking around. I had just come back from a walk when I saw the flier, newly pinned to the hostel community board. 
I arrive a few minutes before 8, not wanting to be late. There are other people here, but no one heading into theater 3. I had double checked with the ticket taker that I was at the right place. Maybe everyone is already sitting?
The door creaks as I push it open gently, hearing no voices from the theater. The walkway is quiet, dark, just like American theaters. I round the corner to find a set when a man steps in front of me.
“¡Hola! ¡Bienvenido a la presentación de Raising Arizona por parte del club de fans de Nic Cage!” [Hello! Welcome to the Nic Cage fan club’s showing of Raising Arizona!] 
He startles me and I gasp and clutch at my chest while the man apologizes profusely.
“¡Lo siento! No quise asustarte.” [I am sorry! I did not mean to frighten you.]
“No, it’s ok… I mean..uh…shit..” My Spanish has decided to take a siesta, apparently. 
“Ah, you speak English! No problem! Welcome to the Nic Cage Fan club showing of Raising Arizona!”
He gestures to the massive screen behind him and I can’t help but smile at the ridiculously happy grin on this man’s face. It lights up the entire theater. Which I now realize is completely empty. 
He sees me looking at the empty seats and his smile falters a little. “Not everyone is as interested in Nic Cage movies as we are, it seems.”
“Apparently.” 
He watches me for another moment before lowering his voice. “If you would like to leave, it is ok. I won’t hold you here.”
He shifts his weight and a light finally lands on his face and fuck is he handsome. He’s older than me for sure, maybe early 40s? But damn if that doesn’t do things for me. He’s got this dark, curly, wispy hair, one curl trying to sneak across his forehead to settle there, dark brown eyes watch me with apprehension as I take in the rest of him. His nose? Romanesque, aqualine, whatever you call it, it's hot. His shoulders are broad, tapering down into a smaller hip line but there’s a swell of a smaller tummy behind his button up shirt and it makes me want to clench my thighs together. 
I snap out of it and meet his gaze. 
“Why would I leave? I won’t get another chance to see Raising Arizona in Mallorca - and with the president of the Nic Cage fan club?”
His brown eyes grow wide. “How did you know I am president?”
“Lucky guess.”
He smiles at me and I melt inside. “So, uh, does it matter where to sit?”
“Oh! No, please. Sit wherever you wish!”
I give him a small smile and turn to face the theater. It’s smaller, several rows of stadium seating rising up a few levels. 
“Señor?” I turn back to the man and find that he’s already looking at me. 
“Javi. My name is Javi.”
“Javi….Where are you sitting?”
“Me?”
“Yes. I’d…like to sit next to you. If that’s ok? If not, that’s totally fine, I can just find-”
“Sí! That uh…that is fine. Come.”
We walk towards the seats and he places his hand above my lower back, not touching me but simply guiding me towards the seats. When we get there, he pushes a chair down and gestures to it. 
“Por favor.”
“Thanks.”
I sit and he sits next to me, placing his arm on the arm rest. Our elbows touch briefly and it’s like an electric shock runs through me at his touch. We both move our arms, trying to give the other the arm rest. 
“I insist, querida.”
I tell him my name before continuing. “No no. You have really broad shoulders. You need the space.”
“I- I do?” He looks at his shoulders in disbelief.
“Oh come on. You haven’t noticed?” Did I just squeeze his shoulder? Wait…is he blushing?
“You're just being nice, querida.”
“No way. You’re broad, Javi. Take the armrest. Por favor.”
He slowly moves his arm to the arm rest and nods at me. “Gracias. If you need it, please let me know.”
“I will.”
The movie starts and about 3 minutes in, Javi can’t help but lean over and tell me some piece of trivia about the set. It’s like he’s never been able to talk about this stuff with anyone. We end up chatting the entire movie, and I think I’ve made my first friend in Mallorca.
I just have to remind myself that it’s a friend and not a friend. 
After the movie, we get gelato and talk some more. Javi tells me about his family and how they have olive farms. He asks me questions about my life and I respond as best I can. 
“...and that’s how I ended up here in a hostel.”
“No, no querida! You are at the hostel?”
The gelato drips down onto the side of my finger and I lick it off. I swear I can see him shifting as he watches my tongue lap at the stickiness on my finger, but maybe it’s wishful thinking. “I am. It’s just me and like 8 other people.”
“You must come stay with me. I have a large estate, many rooms. You can have your pick.” His eyes grow wide as he finishes his rambled statement.   
“Oh. I uh..”
“I am sorry, querida. I do not mean to make you uncomfortable. I hate to see a friend having to share a room with so many people when I have many, many rooms. It can be unsafe-”
“A friend?”
He blushes, not quite meeting my eyes. “Well, I mean…you don’t have to be my fri-”
“I could use a friend, Javi.” I giggle at his almost comical look of relief on his face.
“Oh good. I thought we were getting along and I assumed… but I shouldn’t. You are so young, and I shouldn’t have asked. It’s…cómo se dice [how do you say]…creepy?”
I laugh and he joins in nervously. “Creepy is the right word. But you don’t creep me out, Javi. Quite the opposite. I just…we only just met and I don’t know you yet.”
He waves his hand. “No no. I am sorry. I should not have asked. Just know if you don’t feel safe, you have a place to go, yes?”
“Deal.”
He walks me back to the hostel and says goodnight. I can tell he is having an internal debate on kissing my hand, because it’s raging across his face. I pull him in for a hug instead. He’s stiff, taken aback by my gesture but before I can pull away, he hugs me back, the warmth from his body seeping through mine and I couldn’t help the little sigh that escapes my lips. He holds me for a moment longer before releasing me and stepping back.
“Sorry, Javi. Um..American thing. The hug.”
“Right! Right.”
Ok that was complete bullshit and I think he knows. 
“We’re still on for lunch tomorrow?”
“Sí, querida. I’ll meet you here and take you, if that’s ok?”
“That’s perfect. I’m glad I met you….Goodnight, Javi. ”
“Buenas noches, querida.” [Goodnight]
I feel his eyes on me as I enter the hostel and close the door, waving to him through the crack as it closes. 
Okay, that man is the kindest, nerdiest, hottest guy I’ve ever met. How am I supposed to just be friends with him? He’s the only friend I have here though so…
I enter the room and see my bag open, things around it on the floor. Swearing, I dig around and notice that more than half of my stuff is missing. Nearly all of my toiletries, all of my American snacks, a couple items of clothing are gone, probably because no one steals cheap clothes really, and some other various things. It’s then I notice that my personal blanket I’ve had with me since I boarded the airplane to come here is missing. 
Just then the door opens and 4 of my bunkmates enter, glaring at me as if they were daring me to ask if they took my things. Normally I might, but there are 4 of them and one of me. I gather up my remaining things, shoving them haphazardly into my bag before slinging it over my shoulder and heading downstairs. I hear the women giggling behind me, speaking in some language I’m not familiar enough with but I know it’s about me. Once I reach the lobby, I head for the front door and push it open, pulling out my phone and dial the one person I know in all of Mallorca.
“Querida? Are you ok?”
A small sob escapes me in place of words, but I manage to choke it down. “Is that offer still good?”
—----
2 months later, and I’m still here, at this sprawling estate in Mallorca. Javi let me pick whatever room I wanted, insisting on replacing all of my stolen items, even offering to buy me an entire wardrobe, which I declined. 
Javi and I got closer, and I think I could say that he’s one of my best friends, despite only knowing him a couple of months. He’s the kindest man I’ve ever met, only wanting to make people happy and be happy himself. He never forces me to do anything, or implies that I owe him in any way. I have offered to do graphics for the olive farm, but he insists that I’m a guest and don’t owe him anything. 
We’re eating lunch on the balcony today. The sun is shining and there’s a slight breeze coming in off the water. Taking a bite of my sandwich, Javi turns to me.
“I have to go to Singapore for a few weeks and I’d like you to come with me.”
I sputter, coughing out bits of sandwich as Javi thumps me on my back, offering me my glass of water when the coughing dies down. I take a sip, grateful a cup was so close as I gulp it down.
“I’m sorry. What?”
“I’d like you to come with me to Singapore.”
“Javi, you don’t have to take me.”
“Querida, you told me a few weeks ago you’ve never been in first class. Well, we usually take the jet but it’s in for upgrades and I have some business to attend to in Singapore. Come with me! Singapore Airlines is the best. They have cabins and-”
“Javi, I can’t afford that-”
He waves his hand while blowing a raspberry. “When have I ever asked you to pay for things? It is nothing. I could just use a friend with me.”
His eyes are big and round, exactly like a puppy’s, and he knows I can’t say no to this look. 
“Oh….alright, fine. But you’ll have to show me what to do. How to function in your world.”
“That I can do!”
—----
I don’t know why I let him talk me into this.
The plane is absolutely breathtaking. It’s 2 levels, the first one being what I would call first class seats, but it’s clear these are the “budget” luxury seats on this plane. Everything is clean, the leather showing no signs of use, as if the plane just rolled off the assembly line. At the back of the first level is a lounge, complete with bar and bartender, multiple chairs and tables artfully placed around the smaller room, ambient lighting setting a calm environment. Upstairs are the suites. The rooms at the back of the plane are reminiscent of train cars, each space having a reclining chair and a small divider wall that can pull down into a bed if the guest needed to sleep. 
On our way to the front of the plane where the master suites were, we passed by a bathroom that was easily bigger than my own back home. It even had a vanity mirror and chair, high end toiletries organized into drawers.  
Then we arrived at the suites. 
There was one on either side of the hallway, completely cut off from the hallway. They had little windows on the door and either side of it, but there were blackout blinds you could pull down to have some privacy. Javi slides the door open and gestures for me to enter. 
It’s similar to the rooms at the back, but bigger. There’s a reclining chair, a massive tv, Bose headphones for use, and a double bed, either full or queen size, plush pillows and the softest looking comforter I’ve ever seen are spread out on it. A robe that probably costs more than my rent sits on the mattress and holy shit - is that a freaking mini fridge? 
“Javi, I- this is too much.”
“Only the best! Next time, we take the private jet.”
“Next time?”
He blushes. “If-if you would like to, of course.”
I set my clearance rack backpack down on the chair and sit on the bed - which is way more comfortable than any mattress I’ve ever owned. 
“I’m going to set my bag down.” Javi points to the door across from mine with his thumb and gives me a small smile. 
Once he leaves, I let out a long sigh. If you had told me even 3 months ago that I would be sitting here, in a first class of the first class cabin that probably cost…oh shit, what did a ticket for this cost?
A quiet knock shakes me from my thoughts of money and tickets. A stewardess pokes her head in, looks at my big box store clothes, and grimaces. 
“Can I bring you anything, miss?” Her last word is spoken with a snark that I’ve come to expect from those with money. 
“Oh no, I’m good. Thank you though.”
She gives me a forced smile and nods. “If you need anything, press the button on the wall.” She gestures towards a small button on the doorframe and leaves. 
Before I have time to dwell on that interaction, another knock comes and Javi opens the door. 
“Querida, let’s go down to the lounge for takeoff. It’s allowed,” He says, in answer to my questioning look. 
“I…ok.”
I get up and smooth out my jeans, trying my best to fix my plain black tee that I had thrown on. It’s a little wrinkled but it’s what I have. I follow Javi down to the lounge and he gestures to a couple of chairs while he waves down the bartender and orders a couple drinks, already knowing my favorite. He sits in the chair next to mine and smiles at me.
“What do you think?”
“It’s…I’ve never flown in such luxury before. It’s beautiful.”
He beams, his smile lighting up the entire room and my heart starts to race, my palms becoming sweaty as his gaze remains on me. 
Another couple sits in the chairs across from us, facing our table. 
“Ah, Mr. Gutiérrez. We haven’t seen you in a while!” The man speaks, a fake toothy smile spreading across his face as Javi nods at him.
“Señor Jones. It is a pleasure to see you again.” Javi smiles at the man, but the smile doesn’t quite reach his eyes. 
The man, Mr. Jones, turns his harsh appraising gaze on me. His eyes rake down my body, a look of poorly disguised disgust on his face as he takes in my cheap clothing, my shoes that have walked me across half of Europe but have definitely seen better days, and the way I slump in my chair, trying to hide myself. The woman he’s with, assumingly Mrs. Jones, hasn’t stopped silently tearing me apart since they sat down, her eyes getting more and more narrow the longer she stares at me. 
“Did you run a charity auction?” Mr. Jones asks Javi, his eyes sliding off my body to look at him.
To his credit, Javi looks confused - genuinely confused. “I am sorry?”
Mr. Jones subtly nods towards me, his eyes never leaving Javi. “Did your friend win some sort of auction or raffle?”
Javi looks at me and back to Mr. Jones. “What raffle?”
Just then a stewardess comes by, asking us to please buckle up as the bartender hands us our drinks. I take a few more sips from it than I normally would, knowing that I won’t be able to get another until we’re at cruising altitude. I’ll have to endure The Jones’s sober. Because there’s no way this thing has enough alcohol in it. 
“What did you mean, raffle?” Javi addresses Mr. Jones, his eyebrows furrowed in confusion. 
“Your…friend. Did she win a raffle?”
Javi shakes his head, speaking louder as the plane starts to take off. “Not that I know of.” He looks at me and I feel my cheeks getting hot, both angry and embarrassed. I give my head a tiny shake and feel Javi’s eyes boring into the side of my face as I look down at my glass, watching the ice swirl around as I shake it. 
I can feel the bartender and stewardess watching us, listening hard to our conversation because they too were giving me looks of “you don’t belong here”.
“Then why is she….ah.” Mr. Jones has a knowing smirk as he looks at Javi. “Nevermind. I get it.” He gives him a wink and Javi looks even more confused.
“I don’t understand.”
“Oh. Do they not have…you know…where you come from?”
“I still don’t-”
“Honey,” Mrs. Jones speaks for the first time since they sat down, leaning in to whisper in her husband’s ear, although she speaks just loud enough for Javi and I to hear. “I’m sure they have escorts in Spain.”
Javi’s cheeks turn a brilliant shade of pink as his eyebrows raise in comprehension, his palms rubbing down the length of his pants. 
“Oh no no! You misunderstand! Querida here is my friend.”
“Friend. Sure.” Mr. Jones gives him a wink and Mrs. Jones chuckles. 
“No, really. She is just mi amiga. My friend.”
“Mr. Gutiérrez, it’s okay. Everyone has different..tastes. Remember Mr. Parleter? Why he asks his..friends… to dress up like commonfolk too. Says it grounds him.”
The speaker bings and the stewardess informs the room that it’s safe to move about the plane. Thank God for cruising altitude. 
My fingers fumble with the seat belt latch, finally prying it open and standing quickly. “It was nice to meet you, Joneses.” I had to keep myself from spitting that sentence out, but I didn’t know if these people had connections with Javi and I didn’t want to put another mark on his image - it’s clear my presence here already has. I don’t belong here and nearly everyone aside from Javi has made that perfectly clear. 
“Querida-” Javi tries to get my attention, but I continue to the door and push it open, quickly ascending the stairs and practically running back to my room. 
I pull down the privacy blinds and kick off my shoes, pushing them behind the chair to get them out of the way. I can’t believe I let him talk me into this. I don’t even know how to behave in this world. When we land, I’ll just get a coach flight back. Sure I’ll be crammed for like 24 hours, but it’s better than everyone assuming I won a raffle. Or that I’m Javi’s whore.
Now there’s a thought. He wouldn’t even need to pay me…
A quiet knock raps across my door. “Querida?” His voice sounds muffled but I know it’s him. 
“Go back to your friends, Javi. I’m ok.”
“I am with my friend. Well, trying to be.” 
Asshole. How is he so nice?
Grumbling, I unlock the door and slide it open, seeing a pair of concerned brown eyes looking at me. 
“Yes?”
“I am sorry, querida. I corrected them but-”
“It doesn’t matter, Javi. But thank you.” I leave the door open and turn back to sit on the bed. Javi hesitates and then enters, waiting a few moments for me to stop him. When I don’t, he slides the door closed behind him. 
“May I?” He gestures to the bed next to me and I nod. He sits down and turns to face me, his knee touching mine, the contact burning me through my pants. 
He takes my hands and holds them, his thumbs massaging my skin. Everywhere he touches me feels like an electric shock - my body lighting up with every stroke of his thumbs, all the way down to my core. He is watching me, waiting for me to say something.
“Javi, I don’t belong here.”
“Sure you do. The Jones’s are assholes. Just ignore them.”
“It wasn’t just them, Javi. Everyone here looked at me like I was lost, a charity case, looking down their noses at me. Listen, when we get Singapore, I’ll just get a coach ticket back on another airline. I don’t want to ruin your image-”
He scoffs. “You only enhance my image, querida.”
“Javi, you do business in a world I’m not a part of. But I do know that appearances mean a lot, so I won’t pull you down with my…whore clothes.”
I couldn’t help the self deprecating remark. Javi smiles at me, one of his hands coming to my cheek, resting against my skin as his thumb wipes away the tears I didn’t realize had fallen. His eyes move back and forth between mine, and he leans closer to me. My breath hitches in my throat as I move towards him. 
But then he drops his hand and looks away from me nervously. 
“I..I think we should watch a movie! Yes - clear your mind. They have an excellent selection of Nic Cage movies.”
Did I misread that signal? Wasn’t he leaning in to…maybe I’m projecting my own feelings onto him. Still, he is sweating slightly and breathing heavier, nervously chatting about Nic Cage. And he hasn’t looked at me again. 
“...or Face Off. That’s always a good one, although not very calming-”
Fuck he’s hot when he passionately rambles. 
“OK. National Treasure it is!” He concludes, quickly grabbing the tablet that controls everything in the cabin and swiping across the screen to find the movie. 
I settle back onto the bed, shifting over to the far side. Javi gets the movie started and then turns back, looking between the space I had obviously left for him on the bed and the chair next to it. He takes an uncertain step towards the chair. 
“Javi, just lay with me. We always watch movies on the couch together.”
“Yes, but…this is…not a couch.”
I giggle. “Javi Gutiérrez. Are you afraid to lay on this bed with me, fully clothed, about to watch National Treasure?”
“I do not want you to think I am taking advantage of you.”
“There is no way you could ever take advantage of me, Javi.” Because I’m willing.
He sits on the edge of the bed and shifts his body towards the tv. This man. Rolling my eyes, I grab his arm and tug him towards me, catching him off guard and using that to my advantage to push him down onto the pillow. 
“There. See? Nothing bad happened.”
His chest rises and falls quickly as he looks at me, a fire burning in his eyes that I had not fully seen before. The movie starts to play and I lay back against my pillow, watching the first several minutes in silence. 
“Did you know the director, Jon Turteltaub, went to high school with Nic Cage?”
I did know. “Really?”
That’s all it took. Javi launches himself into his info dumping, telling me fact after fact about the movie and Nic Cage, getting more passionate with each one. This is one of the things I love about him - his intense passion for those things he cares deeply for. His entire demeanor shifts, eyes glazing over in admiration of the facts he’s artfully spilling, and I eat up every word. He pushes himself up on his side, shifting towards me as he leans on his arm, his hand against his head to hold himself up. His other arm gesticulates with his speech, accentuating each word. Several minutes goes by before he stops.
“Isn’t that all just fascinating?” His eyes find mine and oh fuck there’s the puppy dog gaze that I’m weak for. 
“Amazing,” I sigh out, eyes begging for more. 
His gaze flicks ever so slightly down to my lips before he leans down over me and gently pushes his lips to mine in the softest kiss I’ve ever received. My breathing picks up, my palms sweating. But then he’s pulling back, his warmth leaving me and my eyes shoot open, finding him already looking at me. 
“I should not take advantage of you.”
“You aren’t!” I almost yell it and his eyes search mine for…something.
“I am so much older than you, querida. I should know better-”
It’s my turn to lean up, bringing my lips to his in an awkwardly angled kiss. My neck is burning with the pressure but I keep my lips on his, gently licking at his to deepen the kiss. His hand comes to the back of my head, holding me to him but allowing me to relax into him as he opens his lips, his tongue darting out to dance with mine. He lays me back, the top half of his body over mine and I moan, feeling the weight of his chest on mine. He pulls back again, his nose tracing a small line up and down my own. 
“Are you sure, querida? You do not owe me anything.”
I push him up a little, grabbing his cheeks to make sure he’s looking at me. He looks hurt, like he thinks I’m about to push him away. 
“I’m yours.”
He smiles, bringing his nose back to mine as he whispers against my lips. “And I am yours.”
He kisses me again, deeply, his fingers gliding across the exposed skin on my arm, leaving behind a trail of goosebumps. He palms my boob over my shirt and I inhale sharply, pleasure shooting out from my chest and going straight to my cunt. The hand moves down to the hem of my shirt, trying to pull it up at this weird angle.
“Hold on,” I manage to say against his lips. 
He shifts off me as I sit up, my fingers fumbling with the edge of my shirt as I yank it over my head and toss it in the direction of the chair. I think. My bra comes off next, nearly ripping it off my chest when the clasps refused to come undone. The second it’s off, Javi pushes me back down, shifting his body closer to mine and grabbing a boob with each hand, massaging them and swiping his thumbs over my nipples. I gasp, the sensation catching me off guard. He lowers his head and takes one of them in his mouth, warmth and wet surrounding my nipple as he laps at it.
“Oh shit, Javi. That feels amazing!”
He continues on to the other boob, not wanting it to feel left out, his hand covering the boob his mouth had left wet. His fingers pinch my nipple as he sucks on the other and I can’t hold back the whimper that comes from me. He kisses a path back up my chest, softly nipping at my chin before his lips find mind again, his chest heaving against mine. I feel his hand trail down my stomach, lightly touching my skin as it moves lower and lower. He fumbles a bit with the button on my jeans, but manages to open it, sliding the zipper down. 
And then he stops moving.
“Javi, touch me, please,” I whimper into his mouth and I feel him chuckle quietly at my plight.
“I’ve got you, querida.”
His large hand slides through my curls, his thick middle finger running straight down me, circling my entrance without pushing in. 
“Fuck, Javi!” I can’t contain myself as he slowly pushes a finger inside me, wasting no time in adding another. 
His lips find mine and he bites at my lower lip, the palm of his hand pushing down on my clit as he rubs it there, pumping his fingers into me. Wet sounds permeate the plane sounds in my cabin and-
“Mmmm,” Javi whines into my mouth. “You feel amazing, querida.”
His fingers start to scissor inside me and it’s like he’s shooting pleasure directly into my veins, lighting up my body. My body writhes under him but his arm pins me down. A tidal wave of arousal is building inside me and I can feel it about to break. Javi must feel my thighs starting to tense because he kisses me just as I come, and fuckfuckfuck! My entire body lights up with my release, pleasure rocking through me as Javi continues to rub that spot, swallowing my moans into his mouth. 
Coming down, I start to pant and he pulls his fingers from me, slowly sliding them up my sensitive cunt and I jolt as he rubs past my swollen clit. 
“Javi, that..” I have no words. None. I’ve never been touched this thoroughly by a man. Then again, I’ve never wanted a man this bad before. 
Javi moves from the bed and my eyes snap to him. “Where are you going?”
He looks down at me and I must look like a spent mess, no top, pants unbuttoned, and my hair is scattered across my pillow. 
“I..I do not wish to presume…” Javi blushes, turning a bright shade of red as he tries to turn his back to me quickly, but not before I catch sight of the massive tent in his pants. 
“Wait!”
He stops but doesn’t turn to face me. I shuffle off the bed and stand in front of him, trying to catch his gaze, but he can’t seem to meet my eyes. Gently, I place my hands on his warm cheeks, but when he doesn’t look at me, I pull him gently down, giving him a soft kiss. I softly slide my hands down to his shirt, reaching for the first button.
“You aren’t presuming anything…may I?” My fingers are gripping the button and while he still doesn’t look at me, I see the smallest nod of approval. I undo the button and am rewarded with more of that sunkissed, tan skin I love so much. 
“I’ve wanted you since that night in the theater.” I confess, undoing the next button. 
“And then you saved me from that hostel.” The next button slides open easily.
“You could’ve just left me. But you didn’t. Made sure I was safe and comfortable.” The last button pops open and I am so thankful that he always has the first few undone because I’m barely containing myself here. 
My fingers gently slide in his shirt, letting my fingers glide up his torso as I push the shirt from his shoulders, watching as he shudders under my touch. His shirt falls from his shoulders, landing on the floor in a pile. Fuck I just want to touch him, have his body on me, but the tension is thick and I’d be lying if I said I didn’t like it. I reach for his belt and open it along with his pants, slowly sliding them down his body. Shit this tent in his boxers is huge. I gulp as I get the pants down and he quietly kicks them to the side.
I take a small step back from him and he finally looks at me, eyes blown wide with restrained lust. I start to shuffle my pants down, taking my underwear with them and kick them off somewhere in the cabin. 
“Do you have any idea how many times I’ve touched myself to the thought of you, Javi?”
I bring my hand to my cunt, slowly sliding a finger down me to accentuate my point, when a large hand grips my wrist tightly. He moves my hand, watching my fingers slide expertly through my folds. He has to feel how wet I am for him, despite coming just a few minutes ago.
“Querida, are…are you sure?” His puppy eyes find mine and I know I’ll do anything for him.
“No doubt in my mind.”
That’s all it took.
Javi pulls me to his body, gripping my face and kissing me deeply and he turns us, my back facing the bed. His lips never leave mine as he shifts his lower body away, shuffling his boxers down. But then he loses balance and he nearly falls, catching himself on the side of the bed, boxers twisted around his ankles.
“Mierda!” [Shit!] He’s fighting with the boxers now and I can’t help but giggle - this is completely Javi. Adorkably sexy. 
“Well.. I think I have ruined the mood.” He sounds so defeated, like a kid who dropped his brand new ice cream cone.
“Not a chance, Mr. Gutiérrez.” I pull him to me and kiss him, winding my fingers through his impossibly soft curls, finally getting a chance to tug on them the way I’ve wanted to.
He moans into my mouth, gently pushing me back to lay on the bed,his lips never leaving mine. Once my back hits the mattress, he breaks the kiss as I shuffle further up, my body diagonally across the bed. Javi locks eyes with me as he crawls up my body, planting kisses on my searing skin as he makes his way up. I open my legs wide to give him space and he leans his body on me, his erection pinned between our bodies.
Correction - his massive erection.
He’s thick and long, his hard cock pressing into my stomach as he tries to prop himself up over me, as if he’s afraid to fully rest. His fingers lightly touch my face, tracing the outline of my jaw and nose, his fingers softly sliding across my lips. He leans down and kisses me gently at first, and I feel him twitch on my stomach. He deepens the kiss, my mouth already open and ready to take him, and his hips start to grind into mine, our moans filling the cabin. He shifts his hips back and his cock moves, now sliding through my wet folds and fuck does that feel..fuck! He picks up his pace slightly, running his hard cock over my clit and I whimper under him.
His hips pull back for another pass through my folds, picking up the pace because of my reactions. But on the second thrust he misjudges it and pushes himself inside me, stopping about halfway inside me. My head hits the pillow and his name erupts from my lips.
“Fuck, Javi!”
I thought I would be able to take him but the way I feel stretched around him, a slight burn at the abrupt entrance, and so full already, it all caught me off guard. Tears form at the corners of my eyes so I close them as I grip the sheets, fistfuls of fine linen being crushed by my palms.  
“Querida! I am so sorry!” He starts to pull out but I yell again and he freezes.
“What do I do?” He’s panicking - I can hear it in his voice.
“Just…hold on a sec.” I take a few deep breaths and relax, my muscles starting to open more, now that it’s not a surprise. A few moments go by and I feel his eyes scanning me, afraid to move, afraid to hurt me again.
“OK…I’m ok.”
“Querida, I am so sorry. I’ll just-” He starts to pull out but I grip his arms, wrapping my legs around him.
“Javi?”
“Sí querida?”
“I need you inside me. I need you, Javi.”
He lets out a puff of air that I’m sure he’s been holding onto. “Are you sure?”
“Please, Javi. Fuck me.”
“Sí señorita.”
He pushes in slowly, stretching me even more and my mouth flies open, his name a whisper on my lips as he bottoms out, filling every part of me. 
“You feel so tight querida. I- I have to move.”
“Oh fuck please move.”
And he does. 
He sets a slow pace at first, dragging himself out of me and I feel hollow without him. But then he pushes back in and my body takes him in this time, ready and willing to have him fill me up. He snaps his hips when he’s fully inside and some spot at the back of me lights up, stars erupting across my vision as I moan out his name.
“Oh fuck yes Javi! There!”
He focuses his thrusts on that spot inside me, picking up his pace as I grab his shoulders, my fingers scraping across his skin trying to find purchase. 
“I’ve wanted you since that night at the movies too, querida….I thought about..ugh…making love to you there in the theater…watching you…nghh…bounce on my lap…fuck you’re gripping me so tight I-”
His hips still a moment, his eyes closed in concentration. A few second later, he nods and thrusts back in, immediately finding that spot that has me whining his name. I feel his hand on my stomach, snaking down to rub on my clit and my whole body clenches, throwing me over the edge of my rapidly growing release. His hips sputter into mine and I feel him come with me, both of us crying out into the room.
“I love you, querida!”
“Fuck Javi! I love you too!”
Arousal gushes from me, leaking out as I scream his name, my orgasm making me shake with pleasure, my limbs growing weak as I finally come down. Javi rests his head on my sweaty chest and I seize another opportunity to run my fingers through the soft curls. 
“Did you mean it?” I can’t help but ask, ready to accept that he only said it in the heat of the moment. 
He lifts his head and I see his wide eyes, soft and brown, full of some emotion. Is it-
“I did. I love you, querida. No one else gets me like you do.”
“I…feel the same way.”
He smiles and it lights up the cabin, ear to ear grin as he giggles. “This is fantastic!”
Just then a blast sounds and we jump, completely forgetting that the movie was still playing.
“Did..did we just fuck to National Treasure?”
His grin is back, a cheesy, toothy smile as he enthusiastically nods. “Except, we did not fuck. We made love.”
He kisses me but pulls back to speak low in my ear. “When we arrive at the hotel, I’ll get a chance to fuck you properly. The entire hotel will know my name as it spills from your lips.”
Fuck am I ready for that.
—----
Here's a photo of the cabin:
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