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mirkwoodshewolf · 3 years

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Never have regrets; Joe Mazzello x reader

*Author’s note*

Hey guys well here I have another Secret Santa gift. As a part of the Get Down Give Joy giveaway I would like to present @stewielover95 with your fic. Yes dear I am your secret Santa. I really hope you like this fic in the end, I struggled with it at first but then I finally had a good direction to go with it. Anyways I also want to thank @warriorteam1924 and @thosequeenboys for creating this splendid give away, after the LONG AND HELLISH year that 2020 has given us, it was very sweet of them to create this little give away to brighten up our holiday spirit (esp. since we can’t really see our families this year. Even if you can, PLEASE BE SAFE!!!). Now I’ll stop typing so that you all can start reading, hope everyone enjoys this lovely little fic with our beloved dino boy Joey Mazzello :)

Warnings: Joe’s chaotic child behavior (MAY CAUSE CAVITIES), fluff, parental angst, parent death, mentions of suicide, a small very subtle HINT of COVID (word isn’t mentioned but still think I should give warning),

Taglist:

@plethora-of-things

@waddles03

@psychosupernatural

@ixchel-9275

@simonedk

@queensdivas

@queen-paladin

@jd-johndeacon-or-jackdaniels

@queendeakyy

@geek-and-proud

@wormzteef

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I was peacefully sleeping. After working long hours at my job I wanted nothing more than to just stay in bed all day and sleep until lunchtime.

“Hey baby~” Joey’s voice cooed in my ear. I felt him kiss my cheek and I let out a tired groan. “Good morning.”

“Joey!” I whined. ��Go back to sleep.”

“No. The sun’s awake, so I’m awake. Which means we have to snuggle and make out.” I cracked an eye open and looked up at him. His auburn hair all messed up from his constant tossing and turning that he does in his sleep.

“We’ll make out when the rooster crows.”

“But babe there aren’t any roosters in New York.”

“Exactly.” He faux a gasp as he collapsed back on the bed.

“How could you? And I thought you loved me?! I knew it. You’re only in it for the money! Or the childhood fame crush! Or was it for Ben? It was for Ben wasn’t it! I knew you two were having an affair behind my back!” god he was such a drama queen. But he was my drama queen.

“Yes we’ve been sneaking in text messages behind your back.” I teased him.

“Okay that’s it!” I then felt him wriggle himself under the covers and I felt myself go from my stomach to my back in a split second.

“Joseph Francis Mazzello III! What the f—NO AHHH NO DOHOHOHN’T! DON’T TICKLE ME!!” I thrashed around trying to get him off of me but he had me pinned right down to the bed.

“You gonna get up now?” I heard him say from under the covers.

“JOHOHOHOE!!!” I screamed out in laughter. “Plehehehehease!”

“No not until you either say you’re gonna wake up. Or until I hear an apology.” Then I heard the dreaded sound and feeling of his deadly raspberries being blown on my stomach, just an inch over my bellybutton. And it was even worse now that he was growing out his beard.

“Okay! OK! OK! OK! OKAY STOP! I surrender! I surrender!” his head soon peaked out from the covers as his face was just a few inches away from mine. His shit-eating grin spread across his face, while his eyes twinkled with that same mischievous spark that made me fall in love with him. “I hate you.” I whined.

“Aww and I hate you too.” He moved closer to my lips and kissed me. “I hate you—so much.” His voice lowered down as he deepened the kiss. I felt his hands cup the sides of my face while my arms wrapped around him.

My right-hand stroking through his already messy hair while my left wrapped around his back. After what felt like an eternal make out session, we finally separated from each other and stared at one another.

“Alright you have my attention Joey.”

“Yay!” he cheered softly. “But in all seriousness, we need to get up. We promised my mom that we’d help with the Christmas decorations.”

“Okay. Now get off me yah goober so that we can help her.” He got off of me and I sat up but I was quickly pulled back onto the bed, laying against Joe’s chest. Him grinning smugly at me as he kissed me on the lips.

“Sorry, had to get my morning kiss from you.”

“And the morning make out session wasn’t enough for you?”

“Morning make outs and morning kisses are two completely different things.” He told me in that philosophical tone of his. You know the one you use to make yourself sound smarter.

“Ahh I see. Well thank you Professor Mazzello on explaining the differences between the two.”

“That’s Dr. Mazzello to you. But you are most welcome. Anything for my best student.” I pecked his nose and got back up but found myself being pulled back again towards Joe.

“Joey!”

“Sorry, sorry I couldn’t resist. Okay for real this time, go on. I’m right behind you.”

“Why don’t you go first and I’ll be right behind you?” I suggested. He sighed and pulled the covers off of us and went to sit up but this time I grabbed his hand and pulled him back onto the bed. I pecked his lips before taking off out of the room.

We both raced down the stairs and towards the living room when I felt Joey catch me in his arms, pick me up and spin me around. Laughing manically while he did it. I myself couldn’t help but giggle when a female voice said.

“Ah-uh Joseph! No horse playing in the house.”

“Sorry mom.” He said as he sat me down.

“Sorry about that mama.” I said.

You see, Joe and I had been dating for practically ten years. We actually met through our good friend Rami way back when we were all on the Pacific. I was part of the costume department, and I was Rami’s assistant costumer. So whenever he got into Snafu’s character of course he tried to flirt with me and I’d play along off of his character telling him he didn’t have a chance.

Between takes the three of us became thick as thieves and kept in contact. Then one day when we were all on break, Rami set Joe and I up to meet at the beach so that the two of us could talk to each other. At the time of filming, Joe and I had been really shy around each other and we both liked each other (of course neither of us had the guts to say it to the other).

But after spending our break at the beach together that’s when Joe made the first I love you confession and—the rest is history as they say. When the three of us reunited for Bohemian Rhapsody and got to know Ben, Lucy, Allen, and Gwilym, our little family had now grown bigger. And it was after filming a concert scene in Japan (with some help from the actual Queen band themselves) that Joe (yes still dressed as early 70’s John Deacon) proposed to me.

So for 2 years he and I had been married. Of course like all couples we have our fights and disagreements but in the end we patch through them and not let it run our lives. Oh and I almost forgot, since I had been so close with the Mazzello family throughout our entire relationship, I had the privilege to call Joe’s parents, my parents even before we got married.

“I swear you both remind me of—” that’s when mom trailed off sadly as she looked down. Joe and I grew sad too as we thought about his dad.

“We miss him too mom. God I—I can’t believe this will be our 3rd Christmas without him.” Joe said as he walked towards his mom and gave him a hug.

“As much as I wish he could be here with us, he wouldn’t want us to be sad on his favorite holiday.” She told us. She took a deep breath in and cleaned her eyes of her hidden tears. “There now, I’ve got breakfast all ready for you two. Once you’re done, Joseph, I want you to bring in the Christmas boxes from the garage and set them in the living room. (Y/n), you and I will get the Christmas decorations from the attic.”

“Ma’am yes ma’am!” We both saluted. We went to the kitchen and ate our breakfast. After that we went to our stations and helped Mama Mazzello with the Christmas decorating.

It took almost all day but we came to a pretty good stopping place today decorating wise. We put up some of the minor Christmas displays up all over the house (like small animal plushies, Christmas pictures of the Mazzello family throughout the years, etc.) Joe managed to get all the outdoor decorations set up and displayed, and mama and I set up the Christmas placemats on the tables.

It was now a bit past 5pm and it was pitch black outside. Joey and I were cuddled together on the sofa and I looked out the window and shook my head.

“I still can’t get over the fact that it gets dark at freakin 4o’clock now.”

“I know it’s crazy. My mom’s never liked it, have yah mom?”

“Oh it messes up my schedule everytime!” Mom cried out from the kitchen as she was prepping dinner. “Hey (Y/n) are your mom and Derek still coming to the party?”

“Yeah. They said they’d be taking the train from Virginia instead of the plane. I think they said they’d be coming up sometime next Wednesday. I’ll call them later tonight to confirm that.”

“Alright well I’ll get the guest room set up for them.”

“You know you don’t need to do that.”

“Nonsense you guys are family. And it’ll be a lot safer here at the house than taking a hotel room with everything that’s going on.” She said.

“Yeah that is true. Thanks mama.”

“Okay well come and make a plate you two, dinner’s ready.” We stood up and got our dinner (steak and potatoes) and ate at the dinner table while playing on Freeform’s 25 days of Christmas was the Santa Clause.

Weeks later and it was the day before the Mazzello Christmas party and arriving in less than an hour was my mom and Derek. If your curious as to why I call my dad Derek, well he’s not really my dad. He’s my stepdad but I really do care for him.

He and my mom met up shortly after I graduated from high school after my parents divorced. My real dad and I…well—we don’t talk at all. Our relationship is very strained so why don’t we just leave it at that? But when my mom met Derek, he’s been the father I wished I had.

He’s loving, supportive, kind, funny, and he’s always there whenever my mom or I needed him. He was there for me when Joe and I were going through a bad patch in our relationship, he was there for all my birthdays and movie premieres, and he was even the one to walk me down the aisle at mine and Joe’s wedding.

I was doing the last final touches of cleaning up the house for my mom and Derek’s arrival, as well as Joe’s siblings, nieces, and nephews. I heard the door open and a stampede of footsteps soon came running towards me.

“Auntie (Y/n)! Auntie (Y/n)!” I was soon glomped by 4 little nuggets.

“Hey there kiddies. Oh I’ve missed you four soo much! How have you all been?”

“I lost another tooth see?” Joe’s niece Samantha said opening her mouth to show me her missing tooth.

“I learned how to ride my bike!” his nephew Matthew aka Matty exclaimed.

“Oh big boy now huh? Bet you were better than your uncle Joey was.”

“I heard that!” Joe called out. He along with this brother and sister came through the living room and I hugged my brother and sister in laws.

“Hey guys Merry Christmas.” I greeted them.

“Merry Christmas (Y/n).” his sister Mary said as she and I hugged each other first.

“Even though Christmas isn’t until tomorrow.” His brother John said.

“Okay Scrooge. Get over here John.” He gave me a kiss to my cheek and the two of us embraced each other. “Joe’s told me about your little league’s championship win. That’s amazing.”

“Yeah those kids did me proud.”

“You know if you could convince Joe and (Y/n) to hurry up with getting kids of their own, they might give you some new champions.” A female voice soon spoke up. Soon coming around the corner of the house along with Mama was my own mom as well as Derek.

“Mom!” I whined.

“Now, now (m/n) don’t go pressuring her just yet. There’s still plenty of time for her and Joe to have kids. Say when their 50.” I chuckled and shook my head at Derek’s statement. I walked up to them and first hugged my mom.

“Did you guys have a safe train ride?” I asked.

“It went well. Much less crowded than I expected.”

“That’s cause you’ve always done the Metro mom. Metro and train are two totally different things.” I told her. I turned to Derek and he said with a smile as he extended his arms out.

“Come here baby girl.” I smiled and went into his arms and the two of us hugged each other. “Don’t just wait till the holidays to come see us. How will your mother and I survive?”

“I’m sorry Derek, work’s just been crazy lately. Directors have been wanting me to do costume designing and fittings for them left and right.” I said as we released each other from the hug.

“And why wouldn’t they? You’re incredibly talented.” Joe said as he came up and quickly pecked my cheek.

“He’s right. I remember you staying up way past your curfew designing costumes for your tech theatre class back in high school.” Derek continued. “And all those times of drawing on napkins and the corners of the morning paper. I swear you doodled sketches like it was no one’s business.”

“You stayed up pass curfew?” my mother snapped.

“Thanks a lot Derek.” I muttered angrily.

“Hey had to come out sometime right?” I playfully nudged him and said to my mom.

“That’s in the past mom. No need to talk about it now.”

“Oh you can be sure we’ll discuss that later little missy.” She lectured as she waved her finger at me.

“Alright, now the rooms have all been prepared for you all in advance. Mary, John you’ll take your old rooms. (M/n) and Derek the guest room has been made up for you all and of course the kids get the cloud bedroom.” The kids all cheered. “Now everyone drop your bags off in your designated rooms and we can all gather around the table for some dinner.”

I helped mom with her bags and guided her and Derek to the guest room while Joe went to help his mom set up the table for dinner.

“So when can we expect future grandbabies from you and Joe (n/n)?” my mom asked.

“If you keep pestering me about that then you won’t have any grandbabies.” I teased her as we came to the room. “Here we are, I cleaned it up myself. Hope you guys will be comfortable.”

“It’s great (y/n). Thank you.” Derek assured me.

“Tell Virginia we’ll be down in a moment once we’re finished unpacking.” My mom said. I nodded then left the two of them to unpack their stuff.

As I came down the stairs, I already saw Joe being attacked by all his nieces and nephews. The kids were climbing all over him like a tree, all of them talking over the other and squealing like little piglets.

God seeing Joe with those kids it—really did make me want to have kids with him. He’s already a fun uncle, I’m positive he’d make a great dad. Probably spoil our kids to no end but—he could be the discipliner if he needed to.

“Ow! Who’s on the head?!” Joe exclaimed. I shook my head at his nephew Matty who had half of his body on top of Joe’s head.

“Alright you kids break it up.” I told the kids as I grabbed Matty and held him in my arms.

“Auntie (Y/n), will you sing for us tomorrow at the party like you did last year?” He asked me.

“You bet she’ll sing for you kids. And hey how about we do one better. How would you kids like it if your auntie (Y/n) and I performed together?” Joe asked joyously. But the kids all let out a groan.

“No uncle Joey you can’t sing!” complained Sammy.

“Excuse me?!” Joe gawked offensively.

“Yeah uncle Joey, you don’t have that good of a singing voice.” Matty agreed.

“And too loud sometimes.” His other niece Katie or as I like to call her Kitty-cat said.

“My own kin turned against me. That’s it you three are in BIG trouble. C’mere!” he went to grab his nieces who quickly ran off his lap and hid behind me.

“Save us auntie (Y/n)!” the girls chorused out. I shielded the three of them and stood before Joe as his face got right up close to mine.

“You know we could team up and catch them together.”

“I don’t betray kids Joe.”

“So—they’ve turned you too. Fine. I’ll take you down first.” Suddenly he picked me up over his shoulder and proceeded to spin me around and around like a helicopter.

“JOEY!!” I exclaimed through my laughter.

“Then surrender the kids to me or the spinning continues.” He threatened.

“Well then this game’s gonna have to be put on hold cause it’s time for dinner.” Joe’s mom spoke up. The kids all raced to the dinner table while Joe put me back down. I stumbled a little but he caught me and asked.

“You okay?”

“I’ll live. Just next time don’t spin me around so fast.” I kissed the corner of his lips before heading towards the sinner table with Joe right behind me. Soon enough we all gathered around and had ourselves a pre-Christmas family dinner.

Soon it finally arrived. The most wonderful time of the year, Christmas eve. All the gifts were now placed under the tree wrapped up in various Christmas themed wrappings or color schemes of silver, red, gold, and green. Now it was really beginning to look like Christmas.

“Alright guys, as per tradition we shall start off with (Y/n);s annual Christmas performance.” Mama Mazzello said. I stood up from Joe’s lap as everyone applauded.

Derek at the speakers ready for my signal for him to turn the first song on. I nodded and he clicked the play button and soon my first song (in fact the very first song I ever sang back when I was a teen for my family) Faith Hill’s “Where are you Christmas”.

It’s also my mom’s favorite song and every year since I sang it back when it came out in 2000 she’s wanted me to sing it just for her. As I sang I could see the tears forming in my mom’s eyes as a wide smile spread across her face and she lip synched the words. The kids all stared at me in awe, and my beloved Joe Mazzello he was entranced.

He’s always teased me of how I should be a singer instead of a costume designer and back when we were both involved with Bohemian Rhapsody he’s sworn that he’d get me up on stage with Queen and Adam Lambert to sing with them. Thankfully that hasn’t happened (and I hope it continues that way) so Joe’s just had be do private concerts for him.

After the song was done they all clapped as I told Derek my next song and helped him search the right version of the song.

“This one right here?” he asked to confirm.

“Yep that’s the one.” I told him. I turned back towards the family and now playing on the speakers was Carrie Underwood’s “Do you hear what I hear?” I fingered the piano chords against my thigh, pretending that I was actually playing the keys (even though I can’t play to save my ass, even with Rami’s help).

That song required a lot of breath work and correct timing but I managed to pull it off and once the song concluded everyone clapped again. This time for the final song, I took out two chairs and set them before everyone.

Joe took this as his cue to come up and help me set up the finale song, especially since he was going to be joining me on it this year. We had been practicing this since November, he wrote the script and everything and we rehearsed it and rehearsed it and rehearsed it.

“For this final song I first want to thank my director and partner Joe Mazzello for writing the script for this little skit you will see.” Joe nodded as he came in with two cups of hot chocolate (his being made of almond milk of course). The two of us sat side by side and Joe clapped his hands together and said.

“And…..action!” I took a sip of my hot chocolate and said my first line.

“I still can’t believe you can finally drink hot chocolate.”

“Hey almond milk saves lives.” He said his line.

“Personally, I’d never drink that stuff but so long as it helps you. I’m glad I could share this tradition with you.”

“Me too babe.” My phone then dinged and I said.

“Oh my god!”

“What? What is it babe?”

“It’s already pass midnight. My mother’s gonna kill me!”

“Whoa, whoa wait a minute. Don’t tell me you’re going out there!” he said as we both stood up and he gestured toward the window.

“I have to Joey. Even if it’s 20ft of snow out there, it’s nothing compared to the wrath of a mother who doesn’t like their baby staying out past curfew.” I broke the 4th wall and turned to my mom who crossed her arms and looked at me with a playful scowl.

“C’mon just give her a call and explain it to her. It’s way too cold out there for you. I won’t let you freeze out there.” Derek then turned on the song “Baby it’s cold outside” the Seth McFarlane and Sara Bareilles version.

The two of us walking in circles of each other with me trying to head out of the living room and Joe coming around in front of me singing Seth’s part while I sang Sara’s.

Every now and then he’d take my hands in his and giving them a kiss. Or he’d brush a strand of hair out from my face, gingerly brushing my cheek with the back of his finger. But just as we got to the end of the first verse, there was a knock at the door.

Joe and I stopped singing as Derek cut off the music and we all turned our attention to the door.

“Mom is—anyone else coming?” asked Mary.

“No.” she simply stated. Four more knocks rang through the house. The kids were started to get frightened as they ran up to their parents.

“I’ll find out who it is.” Said Mary’s husband Dylan.

“No, no, no. You just stay with your kids Dylan. I’ll go see who it is.” Derek offered as he left the living room. After about a minute my mom followed behind him and the next thing I heard was my mom saying.

“What are you doing here!?” it—it couldn’t be. I raced out of the living room as Joe tried to reach out for me and stop me but he was too late. I came around and walked down the small hallway staircase that led to the front door and there at the door was someone I hoped I’d never see again.

For there standing at the door in his famed fedora hat was my dad.

He looked older than the last time I saw him, his hair going grey from the stress and wrinkles forming at the end of his eyes.

“I know I don’t have a right to be here, but……”

“That’s right you don’t!” I snapped. My mom and Derek looked up at me.

“(Y/n) go back upstairs. Derek and I can handle this.” My mom told me.

“(Y/n)?” my dad asked in awe. I glared at him and crossed my arms over my chest. “Wow look—look at you. You’re……practically grown up.”

“Yeah.” I snapped shortly. “You’d know if you’d pay attention instead of just criticizing me all the time.”

“I know. I……that’s actually why I came here.”

“How did you even know we’d be here (F/n)?” my mom asked.

“Well as part of the NYPD I’ve been—keeping tabs on our daughter. And found out who she married and where she was currently living at.”

“You’ve been spying on me!? Great even when you’re no longer apart of this family you still have to spy on everything I do!” I snapped. “So have you come to complain about my husband now? How I should’ve married a doctor or a cop? How I’ve thrown my life away by marrying an actor?”

“No.” he said. “I haven’t come to do anything like that. I just…..”

“No you know what? Let me start off since you never listened to me then, but you’ll hear me now!”

I walked down the steps and even though my mother tried to get me to go back upstairs, I got out of her arms and got right in my dad’s face and sneered at him.

“For years I’ve tried to be the perfect daughter you said you wanted! And for my childhood I tried to follow in your footsteps. But as I became a preteen you began to nitpick at everything! The color of my hair, what type of clothes I should wear, how I should wear my makeup, you even didn’t like the fact that I wanted to get my ears pierced! Said it was for criminals and goth kids to get their bodies pierced. You called me a delinquent!”

“I-I-I know I did. But now I’m……”

“It doesn’t matter what you have or want to say. The verbal abuse you gave me throughout my life has been nothing but a stab at my self-esteem. I tried to commit suicide by the time I was 16 because of you! You did that!”

“I’m sorry (Y/n).”

“Where was the sorry back then? Where was it? All you told me after I got back from the hospital was that it was my fault for disobeying you.” I once again got in his face and sneered lowly, “So whatever you have to say forget it.”

I turned around and walked up the steps. As I got halfway up my dad tried to say to me.

“(Y/n) please. I’m trying to make amends for that now. I know I’ve done and said awful things to you in the past. And looking back on it, it’s made me feel absolutely disgusted with myself. I’m your father, please forgive me. It’s Christmas time.” I lowered my head before turning my head towards him.

“Derek’s my father. Now get the fuck out of my life.” I said lowly to him while I glared at him. I ran back up the stairs and headed right towards Joe’s room. I slammed the door and hid myself in the corner of his room, curled myself up into a tight ball, and tried to keep my tears at bay but every now and then a tear fell from the corner of my eye.

I heard the door open and softly shut. The bed softly dipped down; and the familiar smell of Joe’s cologne hung in the air.

“Please Joe I—I’m not in the mood.”

“I know. That’s not why I came up here though.” I felt him rub my back in soothing circles. “Baby girl, I—I think you should really talk to your dad.” I raised my head up at him, my jaw dropped in shock and my eyes bug-eyed.

“You can’t be serious.”

“C’mon babe it’s Christmas…..”

“So?! I already spoke my mind to him!”

“No. You ranted in anger. You’re not supposed to be angry or any other negative emotion during Christmas.”

“Joe you—” I took a sharp breath in. “I’ve told you what he’s done to me. The neglect and verbal abuse he gave me. How am I supposed to suddenly let it go and forgive him!?”

“I know it’s not easy…..”

“I don’t believe this….you’re actually taking his side!!” I snapped as I backed away from him.

“I’m not! All I’m saying that is if you continue to hate him for the rest of your life, you’ll never be truly happy. Babe please I’m just thinking about what’s best for you.”

Oh my god—it couldn’t be. He wouldn’t…….

“You called him.”

“What? No!?”

“No. No, no, no, no, no, no, not-it-it-it all makes sense. How else could he pick up this address? That whole detective bullshit you reached out to him and called him up didn’t you!?”

“(Y/n) I—”

“TELL ME THE TRUTH!!” I screamed at him. Silence rang out through Joe’s childhood room as he and I stared eye to eye with each other. Not a single one of us flinching or breaking eye contact.

“Even if it was me, as I told you I was only trying to help.”

“How!?” I snapped. “Be thankful your dad died a good man!” At the mention of his dad, Joe’s face grew hard and angry.

“I know. I was lucky. My dad was a kind man, and generous and forgiving. But get this (Y/n), I won’t get to experience that type of father love ever again! And I would give anything to have him back here! To have gotten to know you as my wife instead of my girlfriend! To one day see our children! So be thankful that your father is still alive and healthy!” his voice quivered and choked as his voice got steadily louder.

“Joe, I—”

“All I wanted was for you to make amends with your dad because you never know which day will be your last!” he stormed out of the room and slammed the door shut.

Goddamnit! Now I feel like shit. I sighed heavily and fell down onto the bed and felt the tears stream down my face.

After calming myself down and cleaning myself up, I walked downstairs and there was my mom, Derek, Joe’s mom, and siblings. The kids weren’t there so I assume Mary and John sent them to bed after what had happened.

“If you’re wondering where Joe is he left. Didn’t say where he went he just—took his coat, hat and scarf and just left.” John said.

“I wasn’t going to ask that.” I walked over to my mom and said. “Where’s (f/n)?”

“What?”

“Please mom I—just tell me where he went.” I said urgently.

“He told me he was staying at the Milton motel just 15min. away from here.” I raced and grabbed my winter gear and keys. My mom calling out to me but I didn’t hear her as I got on my bike and took off down the streets.

When I arrived at the Milton, I went up to the front desk and asked to see a (F/n) (l/n), I told the concierge that I was someone close to him. She called him up and told me he’d be down in a minute.

I sat down in the lobby and waited for him to come down. I heard the elevator ding and soon coming out of it was (F/n). He turned to his left and when he saw me, his eyes widened.

“(Y/n)?” I stood up. He slowly walked towards me. “But I thought—”

“First I want to say this before I say something else. You suddenly showing up the way you did was uncalled for. You can’t expect an apology after the years of neglect and verbal abuse you gave me. Even from the smallest little thing about me that I wanted to change, you insulted me to no ends.” I took a deep breath. “And as much as I want to never want anything to do with you again—someone once told me that if I continue to hate you for the rest of my life, I’ll never be truly happy.”

“I’ve looked back on my actions and every day I hate myself for what I’ve done to you. So—will you give me another chance?”

“I won’t forgive you right away and start calling you dad.”

“I’ll take what I can get. Thank you (Y/n).” he extended his hand out for me to take. For the first time in years I took my dad’s hand and we shook on it. “Do you want to spend Christmas day with us tomorrow?”

“I’d like that very much. Plus I’d—I’d like to get to know the man that stole your heart.” My eyes widened.

“Joe! Shit I almost forgot! Ohh but where could he be? He could be anywhere!”

“Just a minute (Y/n), let me make a call.” He took out his phone and made a call. “Hey Jeremy, it’s me. Yeah hey listen I know it’s the holidays but I need your tracking skills.” I saw him nod and hum in agreement, “Okay just a second,” he placed the phone down against his shoulder and asked me, “Do you have his number?”

I told him Joe’s number and he relayed that to his friend. Wow I guess he really is a police officer.

“Really? Great. Thanks Jeremy. Yes you have a Merry Christmas too. See you after the New Year. Bye.” He hung up his phone and said. “His cell was last pinged at the Rockefeller Center.” I thanked him and raced out of the motel and back to my bike. I revved it up and raced on down to Rockefeller Center.

The monument around Christmas time. I stood before the giant, beautiful tree and raced towards it on foot. I looked around for Joe till I finally found him on the other side of the two angel statues playing their horns.

“Joe!?” he turned around and looked at me before glaring softly and turned back around. I raced towards him but he still refused to look at me. “Joey……I—I talked to him. My dad. And—it’s gonna take some time but I…..I told him I’d give him another chance.” He didn’t respond back, hell he still didn’t even look at me. “I was way out of line. I shouldn’t have accused you like that. I mean, even if you did call him I shouldn’t have snapped at you like that. I was angry and—those feelings that my dad gave me when I was a kid I’ve tried to bury them for years. And seeing him for the first time in forever it—made me feel like that extremely insecure girl I once was. And I didn’t want you to see me like that.”

Again, he remained silent and stoic.

“And I shouldn’t have mentioned your dad. He wouldn’t have wanted us to fight, especially on his favorite holiday. I’m sorry Joe.” Nothing. Not even a smug Deacy grin. “Joey?” why wasn’t he answering me?

I slowly approached him and everytime I tried to lean forward to look at him, he just turned his head further away from me.

“Joe please? What more do you want me to say? You were right and I was wrong? That Ben should really be with you instead of Gwil? What can I say that will help you say something to me?” he crossed his arms over his chest and huffed at me.

I sighed sadly and looked up at him. Okay, I get it. Guess he’s really upset with me and I could possibly expect him to go stay with Rami and Lucy for the next month or so.

“Alright. I get it. You don’t want anything to do with me anymore. I deserve it. I was a real bitch to you. But I just want you to know that I’ll always love you, and that I hope you find the right girl for you. Even if it’s not me.” I turned and walked away from him when I suddenly felt two arms wrap around my waist and pull me up against a comfy coated chest.

“And just what makes you think that I would want anyone else?”

“What?” he gave me a cheeky grin. “Oh you son of a—” I proceeded to hit him in his chest screaming profanities at him. All the while he kept laughing and holding my arms back. He then proceeded to peck all over my face with kisses.

Soon my anger turned to laughter as I calmed down and surrendered to his kisses.

“You’re a real jerk sometimes you know that.”

“But you married me in the end right?” I nodded as he once again wrapped his arms around me. “So you really talked to your dad? Not just yelled at him.”

“Yes. I—even invited him for Christmas lunch tomorrow.”

“Well look at you making progress!” he exclaimed proudly before taking off my beanie and ruffled my hair. I exclaimed and tried to shoo his hand away from my head. He chuckled then readjusted my hair to some level of normalcy. “In all seriousness babe, I’m glad you took my advice.”

“Yeah. I mean like you said, I’ll never truly be happy till I let go of my anger. And I haven’t realized til now just how much that anger has been weighing me down.”

“I could see it every time your dad was even mentioned. I hate seeing you be that angry.” he embraced me from behind, nuzzling his nose into my hair.

“I’m—also sorry about….you know what I said about your dad.” He placed my head over his chest.

“I forgive you. We were both angry and said the first thing that came to mind.”

“But I shouldn’t have spoken ill about your dad. He really was a sweet guy.”

“That he was.” He smiled the smile he inherited from both his parents.

“Like father like son.” I giggled. He chuckled and took my hand then as we walked back to my bike, we both looked up and saw that snow was starting to fall.

“Well, looks like we’re getting a White Christmas after all.” He said.

“Indeed, just prepare for the avalanche of feet from the munchkin army come morning.”

“Don’t I know it. But you’re also forgetting one other kid.” He looked at me confused. “You yah big man child!”

“Hey you’re just as crazy about snow as I am!” we then proceeded to nag at each other over who was a bigger fan of the snow, even going as far as to see who would crack first tomorrow morning once we’d see the snow on the ground.

#getdowngivejoy #joe mazzello #joe mazzello fanfiction #joe mazzello x reader #joe mazzello fanfic #joe mazzello imagine #joe mazzello imagines #joe mazzello fluff #secret santa #christmas fic #getdowngivejoy event #bohemian rhapsody #the pacific #wooly boys #jurassic park #the social network #joe mazzello oneshot #undrafted #joe mazzello undrafted

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usertimothee · 3 years

Text

lights will guide you home

title: lights will guide you home fandom: wonder woman, dccu pairing: steve trevor x diana prince rating: t summary: he falls half in love with her the first time he sees her skate.

(a wondertrev college au: in which steve trevor, a player on his university's club hockey team, helps run the school's ice rink when it's open to the public in december. he expects it to be another boring year, until he meets a figure skater who just might change his life.)

read on archive of our own

author’s note: hi! this fic was written for @bearholdingashark as part of the wondertrev secret santa gift exchange run by @wondertrevnet

ice skating is my favorite holiday activity, but because of covid i haven't been able to go :/ so i decided the best way to make up for it would be to write a fic where out lovelies skate!

this was fun to write! hope you like it, jen!

xoxo, rebekah

lights will guide you home

He’s never excited to work the skate rental booth, even though he’s had to do it for the past three years. Since he’s on his college’s club hockey team, he’s obligated to help run the school ice rink, along with his teammates, once it opens to the public come December. He always picks handing out skates. It’s the most boring, for sure, but it’s also the easiest - that means he can study for finals at the same time. So while the other guys fight over who gets to drive the zamboni, he quietly and dutifully signs up for the skate rental booth, and leaves.

He also always signs up for early afternoon shifts; hardly anyone is there on the weekdays, which, again, means more time for studying. He doesn’t expect this fourth year to be any different.

Except when he arrives at noon on December 1st, there are about ten kids already skating around on the ice, their parents sitting in a cluster in the stands, talking and taking pictures on their phones.

“What’s up with all the kids?” he asks Eleanor - one of the rink custodians he’s come to recognize over the years - who’s sweeping around the rental booth. He throws his backpack on the counter as the older woman pauses her work and leans on her broom. She smiles gently as she looks out at the ice.

“One of the girls in the figure skating club wanted to give free lessons this year. So you’ll have some entertainment this year.”

He motions to his backpack.

“Brought my entertainment with me.”

“Well, this entertainment might be more entertaining, and I heard,” she says, moving her hand beside her mouth so she can fake-whisper in his direction, “it might be a little easier on the eyes, too.”

He rolls his eyes, and Eleanor laughs.

“Are you going to try and set me up with someone every year?”

Last year she’d convinced a young woman who brought her niece skating on a regular basis to go over and talk to him. It had been hmms and yeahs and awkward pauses and forced laughs and had, decidedly, gone nowhere.

“I can only try, Steve. Don’t study too hard, okay?” she calls over her shoulder as she walks away.

He gives her a thumbs up in confirmation, and then sits down and gets out his books. He’s just about to put in headphones so he can drown out the Christmas music that plays throughout the arena at this time of year with some music of his own, but hears one of the heavy metal doors to the rink open noisily before he can hit play. A loud but melodic voice rings out in the almost-empty building.

“I’m here! Sorry I’m late!”

A young woman rushes in, racing past his table and throwing her bag in the bleachers, moving in such a hurry that he doesn’t get a good look at her until she takes the ice, gliding onto the slippery surface with ease.

Apart from her white skates and a deep purple scarf and matching gloves, she’s dressed in all black, long dark hair pulled into a messy ponytail. She’s tall - taller than most figure skaters he knows - and lean, but she’s strong. She must be, given her sport, but he can also tell in the way she’s carrying herself on the ice. He can’t see her full face - only her side profile - but he can tell she’s beautiful.

The children flock to her easily, a couple tripping in their eagerness to get to her. She skates over and helps them up. Then, she tells the children to circle around her - in that same melodic voice - and turns.

When he sees her face, looks into her deep brown eyes, his jaw goes slack.

She’s beautiful, undoubtedly. More than beautiful, he decides. Breathtaking. He literally stops breathing for a moment, and his next inhale is a shaky one as his heartbeat speeds up.

Their gazes are still connected, so he notices when her eyes go from kind to questioning. He has a strange urge to get up and go to her, to take her hand and ask her gently what was wrong, when her voice sounds again.

“Is everything okay? Do I need to sign in or something?”

Shit, I’m staring.

He’s staring like an idiot and he pulls his headphones out of his ears and briefly pretends to read the textbook in front of him before answering.

“Oh, uh, no. No, you’re fine. I just...I’ve never seen you before...around here.”

“Oh,” she says, still staring at him strangely, but now looking amused rather than confused. She smiles, and his thumping heart skips a beat. “I’m giving lessons at noon on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays this December.”

It takes a moment to smile back, but when he does, he sees her relax a bit.

“Yeah, yeah. I, uh, figured,” he answers, stupidly, still stumbling over his words like an idiot.

She smiles once more, and then turns back to the kids around her.

“Okay guys! Who’s ready to learn to skate?”

A chorus of tiny voices answer her, and she skates to the middle of the ice surrounded by her small students. He watches, mesmerized, as she begins to move with all the seamless, effortless grace in the world. Studying is all but forgotten, and the beginnings of an enchanted smile turn up the corner of his lips.

“I told you it would be easy on the eyes, didn’t I?” a voice says from somewhere behind him.

“Shut up, Eleanor,” he says, still watching her, and the old custodian laughs.

* * *

He spends his weekend trying to muster up the courage to talk to her. It’s like every cliché movie ever; he stands in his bathroom and talks to himself in the mirror, trying to think of smooth lines and cool looks. He had looked like an idiot last Monday, and kept his sights on his books and avoided any more eye contact with her on Wednesday and Friday.

But it was a new week, a new day. And he couldn’t blow it again. He wouldn’t, he thought confidently as he rushed into the ice rink. It didn’t even matter that he was ten minutes late. He had practiced.

Since he’s late, she and the kids are already on the ice. He sits down at the rental booth and pulls out his books, making a conscious effort to not look at her. He doesn’t want to seem too eager. Playing it cool was of paramount importance. He even puts in his headphones, and presses play on his phone. The soothing music he uses to study begins to ring in his ears.

He opens one of his textbooks, and begins to read…

...And the next thing he’s aware of is the pound of a firm knock on the table in front of him. His eyes snap open, and he jumps slightly, disoriented and groggy.

He had fallen asleep.

He stayed up late the night before, completing study guides and endlessly highlighting his notes as he crammed for finals. He only got about four hours of sleep, but he thought he would be fine.

Apparently, he wasn’t. And now he had fallen asleep, and missed her, and now Eleanor was waking him up to tell him his shift was over or to tease him about sleeping on the job and -

“Steve?”

The sound of his name wakes him up even more, and his heart leaps when he realizes that it’s not Eleanor’s voice calling to him. Instead, it’s the melodic one he’d first heard a week ago.

He looks up, and there she is. Her beautiful eyes stare down at him, the expression on her face puzzled but slightly amused.

“Steve?” she asks again, when he doesn’t say anything. “Steve Trevor, right?”

And he almost kicks himself. He’d been caught staring again, and he can feel his cheeks begin to warm as he blushes in embarrassment.

No, he tells himself. Not again. Pull yourself together. You fucking practiced.

He quickly tries to think of something to say, his brain reminding him to play it cool on loop.

“How...how do you know my name?”

God, he’s so bad at this.

“Oh,” she says, lifting her hand and pointing her thumb over her shoulder. “That nice custodian woman told it to me. Eleanor, I think she said her name was?”

He sits up straighter so he can look past her body, and sees Eleanor by the doors to the locker rooms, waving at him cheerfully with a big smile on her face. He resists the urge to roll his eyes, looking back up at the young woman in front of him and smiling.

“Yeah, I’m Steve. Nice to meet you. It’s been fun watching you with the kids.”

Better, he thinks. A little better.

She smiles brightly at the mention of her student.

“Yes, they’re wonderful. I’m having an amazing time with them.”

“Well, they seem to love you. You’re a great teacher.”

“Why, thank you, Steve Trevor,” she answers, her smile turning more gentle and kind. “You’ve only seen me teach for three days, though.”

“Four, now.”

“Ah, but you slept through the fourth day,” she reminds him, and his skin flushes again.

She laughs at his lack of response, and again, his heart skips a beat. He can’t help but smile.

“Yeah, I guess I did.”

They fall silent, and he’s briefly reminded of that girl Eleanor tried to set him up with last year, and all the awkward lurches and pauses that made up that conversation. This silence is different, though. It doesn’t make him nervous or uncomfortable, and he’s not scrambling for a way out of the interaction.

Instead, it feels warm. Somehow familiar, even though this is the first time they’ve ever spoken. And as they stare at each other, her chocolate eyes gazing into his ice blue ones, his smile grows.

“I was wondering if I could skate one of my programs while I was here,” she murmurs. “I have a test tonight, so I’ll miss my normal practice time.”

“Doesn’t seem like you’ll be disturbing anyone,” he says, motioning with his hand to the empty arena.

She laughs again, and he decides that it’s his new favorite sound.

“Thank you, Steve,” she tells him, and turns toward the ice.

“Wait!” he says, getting up from his booth and catching up with her. “Do you want me to play your music over the loudspeaker?”

Her eyes brighten.

“Could you? I was just going to use my phone, but that would be a lot better.”

“Sure. Just show me which track.”

She hands him her phone, and points it out to him. He grins.

“Hey, I know that song.”

She hums softly, and begins to walk again.

“Maybe,” she tells him as she steps out onto the ice, turning back to face him. “But I don’t think you’ve ever heard this version.”

She begins to skate backwards away from him, but his voice rings out again.

“I don’t know your name!”

“Diana,” she calls back to him, without stopping. “Diana Prince.”

“Diana,” he whispers, as he watches her skate away.

* * *

He falls half in love with her the first time he sees her skate.

The moment she begins to move to the first notes of the piano, she is the embodiment of elegance and grace. He rushes from the media booth and back down to the ice so he can get a closer look. Even through the glass, he can see emotion she puts into every moment of her performance, watches as the expression on her face changes as the music speeds up, as the mood shifts.

Then, the music slows, and becomes softer. She glides as if she’s one with both the ice and the music. And when the music speeds up again, and becomes more intense, so does she. Her jumps and twirls seem effortless, as she lands each one with a gentle precision.

He can’t look away. The entire arena is filled with her performance - with her effort and emotion and heart and skill - and he’s enchanted by her.

When she’s done, and holds her final pose at the center of the ice as the music comes to an end, he realizes he’s been holding his breath. He exhales slowly, and then takes a deep breath in.

Eleanor starts clapping from somewhere else in the building. She finally breaks from her pose, and looks over at her, smiling.

But all he can do is stare after her, mouth slightly open.

It’s only when she begins to get off the ice that he gathers himself. And he makes a decision.

He doesn’t care if he looks like an idiot, or if he’s being too obvious. He’s done trying to play it cool.

He can’t go another day without knowing her better.

He walks to where she’s standing over her gym bag, looking for her shoes. He taps her on the shoulder, acutely aware that this is the first time they’ve ever touched.

“Diana?”

She jumps slightly, and turns to look at him. She doesn’t say anything, though. It’s as if she knows why he’s here, and what he’s going to ask her.

“Will you get dinner with me Friday?”

She grins, her smile wider and brighter than he’s ever seen it.

“It would be an honor, Steve Trevor.”

She reaches up to where his finger still lingers on her shoulder, and places her hand over his.

* * *

The other half of him falls in love with her the first time they skate together.

After their third date, he asks her to teach him how to skate.

“I thought you played hockey,” she tells him. “You already know how to skate.”

“Yeah, but I can’t skate like you,” he counters. “And since we already know you’re such a good teacher…”

She smiles as they walk around campus, looking at all the Christmas lights the school has put up, hand in hand.

“I know I’m not as cute as your other students - “

“I beg to differ,” she interrupts. “And would argue that sometimes, you’re even cuter.”

He blushes, and she laughs.

So they break into the arena. (Well, not technically. He does have a key to the rink.) It’s around midnight when they get there, after everyone has already left for the evening. He gets them both skates out of the booth, and as they lace them up, she laughs.

“I don’t know how I’m supposed to teach you to skate in those things.”

“Hey,” he says, frowning. “Don’t knock my skates.”

He does have to admit, though, that there’s a marked aesthetic difference between his clunky, black hockey skates and her delicate, white figure skates.

“Come on,” she says, standing up and taking his hand so he came with her. “I might still be able to work my magic.”

They glide to the center of the ice, and she begins positioning his body, immediately going into teacher-mode. He thinks it’s absolutely adorable. She says she’s going to teach him a simple upright spin, but he has to admit that he’s not paying much attention because he can’t focus with her hands all over his body - on his hips, legs, chest, lower back, as she moves him in all sorts of directions. He can only take it so long before he pulls back from her.

She looks at him questioningly.

“Steve, what are you - “

He skates forward slightly, and kisses her.

He kisses her, and at first he’s worried he’s made a mistake because her lips remain still, but then she moans softly against his mouth, and melts into him. She throws her arms around her neck, and when his tongue swipes across her bottom lips she parts her mouth readily.

It’s his favorite kiss he’s ever had. And he doesn’t know how long they stay there like that, kissing and holding each other, but they break apart only when they have to, and breathe against each other heavily. They’re silent for a moment, but there’s a comfort in it, just like there was that day he first saw her skate.

“I thought you wanted to learn how to skate,” she says finally, jokingly.

“I do,” he ensures her. “But I think I want to do this a little more right now.”

She giggles, and the sound warms him from head to toe.

“I think we’re in agreement there,” she murmurs.

They smile and stare at each other, him pulling her impossibly closer, and her running her fingers gently down the side of his face.

And in that moment, he knows he loves her. The feeling consumes him, and he almost blurts it out right there. But he decides to keep it to himself for now, for it to be a happy secret that lives inside his heart. And instead, he does the thing he wants to do most in the world.

He leans forward, and kisses her again.

a/n: the song diana is skating to is the mashup of paradise and fix you by coldplay that maia and alex shibutani skated to for their long dance at the pyeongchang olympics. i strongly suggest you look it up if you've never seen it or heard it! not only will it give you a more complete idea of the fic, but it's a beautiful song and an extraordinarily beautiful program.

merry christmas to all who celebrate! i hope all of you have a wonderful holiday season!

#wondertrevsecretsanta #wondertrevnet #wondertrev #wondertrev fic #wonder woman #diana prince #steve trevor #steve x diana #otp: you can save the world #hey i wrote this!

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abovethesmokestacks · 4 years

Text

Distant Connection 1/7

Pairing: Bucky x reader

Word count: 830

Rating: General audiences

Warnings: none

| Distant Connection Masterlist |

I’m not gonna lie, I am both excited and nervous as heck about this series, but I really hope you guys will take to this story. As stated on the masterlist, this fic will have no tag list. It will update Tuesdays and Thursdays at 9 pm EEST. So enjoy chapter one and see you guys Thursday!

Chapter 1: This Is Fine

To: SHIELD Inc (all)

From: Nick Fury

Re: Company quarantine

As most of you have probably seen and heard from the news, we too are facing the threat of covid-19. As such, management has made the decision to enact social distancing protocols. This means our offices will lock down, and all staff that can work from home will do so. Our IT dept will help anyone who needs assistance in setting up their laptop so they can work from home. If anyone needs to come by the offices to pick up equipment, documents or the like, please contact your supervisor to agree on a time. Attached you will find the complete guidelines for how we will work during this emergency. We don’t know for how long this will last, but we will strive towards going about business as usual, with extra team meetings set up, these will be input in your calendars. Questions can be directed towards me, Maria Hill from HR or your supervisors. Be safe, people. Let’s get through this.

Regards,

Nick Fury

CEO SHIELD Inc

So. This is fine. The world is just a raging dumpster fire, but this is fine. You have a major project you are about to start working on with someone from one of SHIELD’s other offices, and now you need to do that over, what, fucking Zoom? Skype? A fucking endless email chain? You skim through the guidelines and you can’t help the slightly hysterical laugh that escapes you, because. What. The. Fuck. Is this happening, really?

You happen to be in the office when the email is sent out, you get Trip from IT to help you set up the VPN you need to be able to access company systems from home, you rifle through all of your folders and then just dump all of them in a box. It’s a surreal feeling because you are essentially cleaning out your office. As if you’re losing your job. This will be fine. You send an email to your project collaborator, someone named Barnes, suggesting a first video conference call on Monday before you log off.

This is fine.

You drink a lot of wine over the weekend, check the systems, sleep in, put out work appropriate clothes on Sunday evening. It’s still a work day. You’re a civilized human being. This will be fine.

Barnes’ voice crackles through seconds before your screen flickers and his… chest comes into view.

“Think you need to adjust your camera, bud,” you tell him, then panicking and checking your own camera to make sure you’re not giving him a weird boob shot.

“Shit, sorry, I’m- -damn thing.” More flickering and finally, his face comes into view.

Well. Yikes. A handsome face looks back at you, hair neatly swept back, eyes blue enough that even a shitty laptop webcam makes their colour come through perfectly.

“Hi, James. I suppose we’ve sort of dealt with the introductions, huh?”

“Yeah, I… I guess so. Or, well… If we’re gonna be working on this for the foreseeable future, you can maybe call me Bucky?”

Bucky. Okay. That’s… Nickname basis from day one. That’s okay. It’s fine. Stay professional. This is important. You shuffle around a few papers, share a document and off you go. Work like any other day. Your slacks chafe against your waist, your chair sucks. You sign off after two hours, stand up, stretch, pop the button on your slack, panic again when you’re gripped by the fear that you didn’t turn off your camera. It’s off. Okay. This is fine. You can work with Barnes. This is fine. You’re gonna need to figure something out about the chair. And the slacks.

Tuesday.

“Ugh, sorry, can we- Keep talking, okay, I need to stretch, my back is killing me.”

Wednesday.

“Oh, Jesus!

“What? What happened?”

“Goddamn car backfired down the street.”

“Oh. That- Coulda been worse, right?”

Thursday.

“Hi, Ba-”

There’s a cat butt on your screen. A great, big furry cat butt.

“Alpine! Off the desk, now! Off! Jesus Christ, I can’t take you anywhere! I’m so sorry, I was getting a coffee and had the call window up, he must’ve snuck in and gotten to the button to open the call. He is apparently ready to take over the world, opposable thumbs be damned.”

You can’t help but smile, wide and earnest, for the first time all week.

“You have a cat?”

“I have a monster, but sure. Had ‘im for about… two years now? No manners. Do you have any pets? Or… kids?”

“No on both accounts. Just me kicking around in this shoebox.”

“Okay. I’m sharing a place with a coupla roommates, but we're all working from home now, and we're all in our rooms, so pretty much in a shoebox here, too.”

The connection flakes a little, freezing the image on him on a small smile. Yeah, okay, he’s cute. But this is work. Get a grip, damn it.

This is fine.

#Distant Connection #Bucky Barnes x reader #Bucky x reader #quarantine fic #social distancing video calling coworkers to friends to lovers #that's a mouthful

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igotthejuice · 4 years

Text

Part 1 of My Bumble Date from Hell

Hey friends! I Hope you’re still surviving COVID. Oh and if you’re class of 2020 congrats to you! I know that shits hard. I’m doing good, still WFH or whateva, I just got off a call. My state is slowly reopening but nothings open, if that makes any sense. I’m sitting here weak over this date I’m about to tell y’all about. In hindsight that shits actually funny af. Oh, also I might get a pet. I just don’t know what I would even want atm. Just a thought I’ve been having lately. Side note y’all, I had a dream Plies was my new neighbor lmao. Okay, so anyways shall we talk about this date from hell? You already know from my last blog that I met him from bumble. I think I like bumble the most. There’s something about being in control of who I want to communicate with that sits well with me. Plus, lets be real, just because you match with someone doesn’t always mean you care to talk to them. So anyways, I messaged him and we exchanged numbers and FT’d almost instantly. If you can’t tell by now I love FT. I’m definitely that person that will FT you and not even be looking at the FT but enjoying your presence lol. Plus, if we’re getting to know each other I like to jump right in. Okay, what should we call this guy? Idk, we’ll give him a basic name like Chris since he turned out to be pretty fucking basic, sorry if your name is Chris…So we were on FT for about an hour…that should’ve been my first sign. If it’s our first time talking we should be on FT for at least 3 hours just getting to know each other. There’s so much to talk about. But he really just didn’t seem to care. Looking back on it, I led the entire conversation. I just saw that as a sign that he was a good listener. So I was pretty surprised when he said he wanted to hang out. I also was a little thrown off since everything is closed rn but he said he wanted to just take a walk and have a picnic on the water. Now I thought that was hella cute so I was with the shits. Fast forward to the date. It was on a Wednesday. Weird day, I know, but 1) we’re both wfh 2) no one has shit to do 3) who tf knows what day it is anyways? Exactly. So I live really close to where we were going to picnic, so he drove to my house and he biked to the picnic spot while I roller-skated. It was actually really cute. He even had a picnic basket that he put on the back of his bike. So anyways, everything pretty much went “right” up until a certain point. Lets just fast forward to where shit got weird.

Mkay so it all started when I noticed he was drinking a lot…like A LOT. And if you can’t tell by now I really don’t like to judge, it’s just not my thing. So while I noticed he was drinking a lot, he wasn’t acting dumb or anything so I didn’t say shit, go awf fam. Welp friends, I should’ve said something because hit the fan real quick. It started with him talking a lot and telling me weird shit about people I didn’t know. Normally that wouldn’t phase me but keep in mind, this man was hella shy on FT. My dumb ass still didn’t say anything. Side note: this is just another lesson. It’s okay to be that “chill” person, but don’t be so chill that you let people just self-sabotage right before your eyes, you’ll regret it. So anyways, he started putting me all over his IG which made me feel uncomfortable because I like to hoe in peace and plus, we live in the same area and y’all already know how that shit goes. There’s no way we don’t have mutual friends. So anyways, after about an hour of him throwing back shots of henny (barf) and recording more and more on his IG he swore some girl was recording us on her phone. Now was the camera facing our way? Yes, but she was far away and it was a beautiful day. She could’ve been recording anything so I kept telling him not to worry about it. But y’all he would not let that shit go. He kept saying “naw trust me, I know exactly wtf it is.” Now at this point we should’ve left…fuck it, I should’ve left. But I just didn’t. So he starts yelling at the girl, ugh jus thinking about it makes me feel so embarrassed and it makes me wonder why I STILL hadn’t left. So anyways, she was with the shits, like sis had time that day. So she’s screaming back at him and at this point they’re going back and forth. He’s calling her a nosey “that” and a hatin’ ass “this” and she’s coming right back it him just as strong. So at this point I’m just watching like everyone else. Oh and at one point she said I had disgusting taste in men. I’m thinking, now wait a minute, I don’t even know this man. So anyways, she must have said something that triggered him because he got up so got damn quick y’all. Sorry, I have to stop here, I’m still working lol. I just wanted to start telling this story since I promised it a few days ago. More tomorrow!

#igotthejuice #blog #bumble #datefromhell #biking #hennythingispossible #mutual friends #rollerskating #sorry chris #tuesday #ft #beautifulday #ig #dont judge lmao #part 1

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lindsaywesker · 3 years

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Good morning! I hope you slept well and feel rested? Currently sitting at my desk, in my study, attired only in my blue towelling robe, enjoying my first cuppa of the day. Welcome to the weekend!

Trolls are criminals and so are people that drop litter! What goes through their head? Anything? Maybe they think, “A cleaner will pick it up.” Yeah, but when? Later today or in a few days’ time once it’s bounced on some dog shit and blown into your face? Maybe they think, “If I pick this litter up, I’m doing someone out of a job!” I was walking through the park yesterday and I saw somebody’s mum hauling a big bag of litter. “I can’t believe there’s so much to pick up!” I said. “Neither can I!” she said, “There are bins everywhere!” As she struggled down the path, she turned back and said, “Oh well, it’s a job ... but I’m actually a gardener!” I felt sorry for her. She could have been somewhere else, making someone’s garden look nice!

A lot of young, unsigned artists say to me,”It’s really difficult to talk to anyone in record companies. I’m a no one; they don’t want to know me!” I feel obliged to tell them it’s like that all through your life. Nothing changes! Many people don’t want to talk to you unless you’re famous, wealthy or you have something they want. And then, once they lose their high-power job, all of a sudden, you’re best buddies!

Another day, another story. A GOP official from Texas who regularly espoused anti-vaccine and anti-mask views online has died from Covid-19, five days after posting a meme on Facebook questioning the wisdom of getting inoculated. Dickinson City Council member and State Republican Executive Committee member H. Scott Apley, 45, died in a local hospital around 3 a.m. Wednesday morning. He was admitted to the facility in Galveston on Sunday with “pneumonia-like symptoms,” and was hooked up to a ventilator as his condition worsened. His wife is also infected, the family said.

The anti-vaxxers are making this about freedom. ‘Freedom’ is an emotive word. We all support freedom. This is why anti-vaxxers lean on this word. They are saying they should have the freedom to choose whether to take the vaccine or not but, at the same time, they are potentially spreading the virus and keeping us in this living hell. Thus, no one has any freedom! No one has any freedom to do anything!

Look forward to your company tomorrow afternoon at 1.00 pm for ‘The A-Z Of Mi-Soul Music’; the final part of The Letter B (Pt. 14) and it’s a very special show. Have a fabulous and funky Friday! I love you all.

And, if you enjoyed this status, you might enjoy my second novel 'Whatever Makes Them Dance' (available via Amazon), 90 Global Ratings to date (4.8 out of 5 stars.)

#mixcloud #mi soul #lockdown #new blog #coronavirus #dj #music #weekend #books

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virginpornstar · 3 years

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What I Learned From All Of My Hookups In 2020

I knew 2020 would be less slutty than 2017-2019 due to the fact I wasn’t living in ATL. I still had plans to travel monthly, discover new cities and new men, and be a slut everywhere I go. Covid-19 ruined that. So 2020 was far less slutty than I had anticipated, but I still had a lot of fun this year. We have to roll with the punches, and readjust our plans when the plague strikes. I still learned a lot about myself and my sexual interests with each new penis that entered my body. Here’s what I learned from all of my hookups i n 2020!

1. GUYS THAT DELETE AND CONSTANTY REMAKE NEW DATING APP PROFILES HAVE MENTAL ISSUES

Hooking up with New Castle started off fun, but then he kept acting weird. I asked him why he’d always delete his Grindr profile then make a new one every other week, then he’d go off on me for asking why. I did realize he’d make profiles advertising himself as a top, then ones as vers, then others as a bottom. A clear sign the man didn’t even know what he wants. We had some good times until he started acting crazy, and then randomly blocking men when I couldn’t hookup.

2. GUYS TREAT ME DIFFERENTLY NOW THAT I’VE LIVED IN ATL

Left Tackle and I had been hooking up off and on since 2016. Yet suddenly in 2020 he wanted to start acting differently, like he’s too good for me. Um what? He also acted grossed out and disgusted after following all my ATL sexual adventures, and I think he started to think I was tainted after reading about me hooking up with a poz guy while on vacation. Oh well. Fuck buddies aren’t meant to last forever. I will not have a guy treating me like he’s too good for me, when in fact I’ve always been too good for him.

3. I NEED TO STOP HOOKING UP THE NIGHT BEFORE VACATION

I noticed a pattern of when I’m supposed to have a slutty vacation weekend I end up hooking up the night before I leave. Which either makes me dickmatized and not horny on the trip, or I get my hole ripped and then I can’t even fully enjoy hooking up while away. I’m still gonna fuck, just not as much or as enjoyably if I hadn’t gotten fucked the night before. I still enjoyed my encounter with Big D, even if he did rip me.

4. I CAN’T STAND VIRGOS

Philly Jawn and I had been following each other online and flirting here and there for years. Then when I was staying the weekend in Philly he and I finally made up. it started off well at first, and we even fucked, only for him to act distant and start ghosting me afterwards. Fuck that nigga. I can’t stand Virgo men since they always do this distant shit, and are terrible communicators. If you’re not interested then say so. Don’t waste my fucking time.

5. FORT LAUDERDALE WAS MORE FUN THAN MIAMI

Miami was my last vacation before Covid-19 plagued the earth. It’s also the last time I flew anywhere. I was so excited to hookup with all these hot Miami men, yet somehow Fort Lauderdale was way better than Miami. The bathhouse was definitely far superior in Fort Lauderdale than Miami at least, and I had way more fun hooking up with guys there than the bathhouse in Miami.

6. MIAMI IS TO LATINO GAYS WHAT ATL IS TO BLACK GAYS

I hooked up with so many latino men in Miami/Fort Lauderdale. They are the dominant population. It made me nostalgic for my younger years. I didn’t really get with many latinos in ATL, since black men rule that city. I had many latino lovers in the past, so it made me a little nostalgic. Sometimes a latin lover is all you need to give you great vacation sex.

7. I’M STILL NOT POZ FRIENDLY BUT MAKING PROGRESS

Miami has long been the biggest HiV hot spot in America. Their infection rates are far worse than Atlanta. So it did seem a bit fitting to hookup with a poz guy for the first time while in the HIV capital. When in Rome...granted I only hooked up with him because he was the only cute guy at the bathhouse at the time. If there was anyone more appealing, I wouldn’t have settled for a poz guy. I also wasn’t comfortable enough to do anal, but it’s still progress to have hooked up with a poz guy without penetration.

8. THE PHILLY BATHHOUSE WAS MORE FUN THAN I EXPECTED

I love checking out the bathhouses in every city I travel to. I didn’t have high expectations for the Philly bathhouse since I knew there wasn’t going to be a pool or hot tub, and those are my favorrite amenities at bathhouses. Yet surprisingly the Philly bathhouse was poppin, and I went on a Wednesday afternoon. It was very diverse, and although I didn’t fuck anyone, I still had a good time.

9. IT’S FUN TOPPING SOMEONE’S DAD

I always thought it was hot hooking up with a dick that’s created life. I hooked up with this DL divorced father of 2, he was young and around my age, but still hot knowing he had kids. I topped him, and then he became my plug. I do miss the weed provided more than I miss him.

10. I DON’T MISS THE BUMS IN THE SOUTH

My northern hookups have come bearing gifts. Weed, money, etc...I don’t miss the bums in Atlanta always begging for handouts. Asking for money, transportation, asking for shit. I’ve had so many guys give me shit without even asking like my DL Latino lover. Maybe I should remain in the north, although ATL keeps calling my name.

11. WHITE MEN LOVE BLOWJOBS

One thing I miss about Atlanta is the men there loved to fuck. Being in the suburbs with mostly old white men and DL guys I’ve realized most of them just want head. I used to be oral only, until I got on PrEP and lost a relationship to never wanting to fuck. So now I love to fuck, but keep encountering guys, like Mushroom Man, where all they want to do is get their dick sucked. Sorry, oral only isn’t enough for me to have a good time.

12. SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO CATFISH A GUY TO GET THE DICK THAT GHOSTED YOU

Chubby Chaster and I spent hours talking one night on Grindr, then he started ignoring me the next day. Oh hell no! I will not be ignored. I got into the whole anonymous profile thing briefly after my friend encouraged me, and weirdly so many guys are into that. I did end up getting Chubby Chaser to come over, and I kenw as soon as he saw me he must’ve been pissed to realize it was me. Oh well. I still made him cum.

13. WAY TOO MANY DL BOTTOMS IN THE SUBURBS

When I think of DL guys, at least the ones that turn me on, I think of guys with girlfriends/wives that are masc men you’d never be able to tell fuck guys on the DL. They’re also tops. Yet somehow all the DL guys with wives/girlfriends/baby mamas where I am now seem to all be bottoms. WTF! How can you fuck your girlfriend’s pussy, but somehow can’t use your dick to fuck a guy’s ass? Yet you want to let guys fuck you in the ass? That’s not fun for me. I top like once or twice a year, yet hooked up with so many DL bottoms this year.

14. I DON’T HAVE TIME FOR OTHER PEOPLE’S TOXIC RELATIONSHIPS

Gorilla and I have hooked up off and on for years. He’s a Scorpio too, and we never get along. Yet the sex is good. He’s been in an off/on relationshp for years, and seems to only hit me up whenever they’re off. Yet we fucked, then suddenly he started being distant afterwards, and then posting his man on social media. Ugh. I can’t stand that shit. I’ve been in that shit where I fuck new guys whenever my ex and I were off, and then when we’re on again ignore the new guys. I hate that cycle, and it’s not fair to the new people I got involved with. So I hate getting involved in that cycle in other people’s relationships since I wanted consistent dick.

15. NEVER KNOW WHEN YOU’LL MEET YOUR FUTURE SUGAR DADDY

I kinda only hooked up with Gasolina because i’d not had dick in months. I was a little desperate. I wasn’t that attracted to his pics, but he had a big dick, and I’m glad we did end up hooking up. Since he turned into my sugar daddy and I had many fun times this summer with him.

16. INVITING OVER A THIRD CAN SALVAGE A TERRIBLE HOOKUP

Panty Man got on my damn nerves. We rented a hotel together for the night, even though we barely knew each other and had only texted/talked on a dating app before. I knew as soon as we began talking, this wasn’t going to work, but I didn’t feel like leaving since I paid for half. I invited over New Castle, and then things turned into a threesome. They didn’t touch each other, but both fucked me. I had a good time, because I invited over another guy. I wouldn’t recommend inviting over a third to salvage terrible sex with your boyfriend, but it works for random hookups.

17. I LIKE CORRUPTING GOOD BOYS

I knew Rocky and I didn’t have any long term potential. He lived too far for me, and his health issues were something I don’t think I could deal with. But we still had some nice times together. He was such a good church boy so I had fun getting him to drink, try edibles, and even wanted him to try poppers. I love introducing men to new things.

18. I DON’T THINK I’LL EVER DATE A WHITE MAN AGAIN

It’s crazy to think I wasn’t even really attracted to black men until 4 years ago, and now I don’t see myself getting serious with any man that isn’t black. Farmer J was the last white boy I went out with/hooked up with, and he will hopefully be the last for the foreseeable future. I’ve had great encounters with white men before, but I never came close to an actual relationship with a white guy. Now after the ignorant comments Farmer J said, and it’s a lot of the ignorance that comes with dating a white man that is attracted to black people, but knows nothing about black people. His offensive comments that he never would’ve realized are offensive, and his voting history were a complete deal breaker for me. Completely reminded me why once you go black, you never go back.

19. GUYS ACT SKEPTICAL ABOUT FILMING YOUR SEXUAL ENCOUNTERS THEN GET SUPER INTO ONCE THE CAMERA IS ON

I saw The Reverend again for the first time in 4 years. I wanted to record more content for my OnlyFans. I knew he’d be skeptical due to the nature of his career, but I have masks and know what I’m doing. I’m surprised how into he got when the camera was on. I always turn my tops into the director since I’m too high on poppers to worry about angles, but it was a fun time. We got some really good footage for my channel.

20. A RANDOM HOOKUP CAN LEAD TO A RELATIONSHIP

Before BMore Bae entered my life I wasn’t looking for love. I had just launched my OnlyFans, wanted to record content, make money, enjoy life, save up before moving to ATL, and then boom. He comes over, he’s cuter than expected, and I caught feelings. I caught feelings fast. It’s been an roller coaster, but it’s so true. Love enters your life when you least expect it. I’m so glad it did. We’ve already made so many beautiful memories together, and I can’t wait to see what the future has in store for us.

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insomniamamma · 3 years

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Late Bloomers: Ezra x F! Reader w/Cee

A/n: Set in the "Liminal" AU in which Ezra becomes his niece, Cee's legal guardian after a car accident kills his brother, Damon, and costs him his arm. Set sometime between "Ferris Wheels Are For Old People" and "Surf City Goodness." Reader is Ezra's neighbor. Established relationship (sort of, IDK how to tag what they are). For @autumnleaves1991-blog and @clydesducktape Writer Wednesday.

Warnings: Not a whole lot. Kissing. Touching. A little spicier than I usually go, which isn't saying whole lot. A little language. Cee, as usual, needs her own warning. Set during the pandemic shut down. Mentions of covid. Also, I feel like 'The Apple' needs it's own warning. I'll link the trailer at the end.

"You sure you don't want to come with us, Birdie?" Cee sits at their scarred kitchen table, her laptop, textbooks and a pile of papers around her. She frowns. "I gotta study," she says, "Ms Stewart is really serious about this quiz. She's not grading on a curve this time." Ezra narrows his eyes. "You have never spent a Saturday night studying in your life," he says. Cee frowns up at him. "You've never been in Ms. Stewart's physics class," says Cee, "She's a hard ass. Anyway, I'm still pulling an 'A' in her class, but I don't want to fuck up my average." "Jesus, Cee," Ezra mutters, and you have to smile. She rolls her eyes. "I know, I know--" "Don't say 'fuck' at school," they say in unison. "They're doing double features all summer," says Cee, "I can miss one. I've seen all these movies anyway." She smirks, "I want to hear what you think of 'The Apple.'" Ezra rummages around for his keys and Cee drops you the most exaggerated wink you've ever seen in your life. "Have fun, guys," she says.

Covid has nuked most of the things you used to do for fun, restaurants and shows, hell, even the libraries are closed. The only business in town that's thriving is the Star-City Drive In. There haven't been any big studio releases in a while, so they've been doing Fright Night Fridays and Sci-Fi Saturdays. Tonight's double feature is Flash Gordon and The Apple. "They've got this weird way of operating the concession stand now," says Ezra, "Cause of the pandemic. You've gotta text them your order and I guess they bring it out to you--" Ezra's gotten pretty good at working his phone one-handed, but you can see the frustration clouding his face. "Let me," you say, loading the menu onto your phone, "Let's get a big popcorn and share it. You okay with the fake butter?" "Of course I'm okay with the fake butter, what kind of monster do you take me for?" "How about candy?" You ask, scrolling through, "It's the usual suspects." "Sno-caps," he says, "How about you?" "I'm thinking Milk Duds," you say. "Now that is an excellent way to lose a filling, Sunshine." "Popcorn and Milk Duds together? Worth the risk," you say and text your order off to the concession stand. It's not quite dark yet, a reel of movie trivia that no one cares about shines ghost pale on the screen. Ez has got the radio tuned to pick up the sound, but there's not much to listen to yet so it's turned down low, background noise with the cicadas and birdsong. The big screen backs up against a farmer's field run wild and a dark stand of trees. "Switch places with me," says Ezra, and gets out of the truck. He comes around to your side and opens the door for you. "Why?" "Indulge me," says Ezra, so you do as he asks and settle in to the driver's side. Ezra's truck has bench seats with vinyl that creaks and cushions that hiss slightly as you move around. There's a tap at the window and you hook your mask over your ears and crank it down, popcorn and candy and you already payed with your phone, but press some rumpled bills into their gloved hands. "Why'd you want to switch places?" You ask around a mouthful of popcorn. "Shhh," says Ezra, "The movie's starting."

Flash Gordon is just as fun as you remember it being, majestic in its absurdity, a big love letter to all the terrible pulp sci-fi movies that came before, the two of you watch and snark and laugh and sing "Aaa-ahhh" whenever someone says Flash's name. We owe it to Queen, you say, and Ezra smiles big the way he does when something's caught him off guard, the way that crinkles his eyes and reveals his dimples, indeed we do. We owe it to Freddie Mercury. At some point his arm finds it's way around your shoulders and you lean into him. "So this is why you wanted to switch spots," you murmur. He raises his prosthetic arm, flickering movie light shining on the double hook at the end. "Can't exactly get handsy with Mr. Claw, now can I?" He grins, "These hooks might be a little chilly." "And pokey," you say, demonstrating with a dig to his ribs. The end credits are rolling. "You ever seen this next movie?" "The Apple?" He says, "No. Some sort of cult-movie thing. Cee made me promise not to IMDB it. She said I should go in with an open mind." "Oh boy," you laugh. "Right? Cee's tastes are all over the place. I suspect this will be either amazing or terrible on a scale that recalibrates our internal gauge of what terrible is." "You know she set us up, right?" "Yeah," says Ezra, "Little Bird fancies herself quite the matchmaker." "She winked at me." Ezra dimples. "Did she now?" "She looked like a cartoon," you laugh, "About as subtle as a ton of bricks." Ezra brays laughter and leans against you, squeezes you closer to him at the same time. He is beautiful when he laughs, all dimples and teeth eyes screwed shut in mirth and you take this opportunity to press a kiss against that tender place on his jaw where his beard refuses to grow. Ezra freezes, you feel his body go rigid against yours, and your first thought is to apologize, to pull back, and then he reaches for you, his broad, calloused palm cradling your face, drawing you to him, presses his lips to yours, a soft, reverent kiss that he does not fully withdraw from, his hand now resting on the nape of your neck, forehead pressed to yours, somehow more intimate than a kiss, this closeness, breathing each others exhalations, leaning against each other. "Cee's not wrong," you say, "We're good together." "We are, aren't we?" He gives your nape a gentle squeeze, and lets you go. The opening titles of The Apple flicker on screen and the music starts up.

"Oh, Ezra, what the fuck did we just watch?" "I don't know if 'watch' is the right word, Sunshine, we did not 'watch' The Apple. The Apple happened to us." "I don't think I've ever understood Stockholm syndrome until now." "I have been assaulted," says Ezra, "My civil rights have been violated." "It's like..." You trail off, "It's like if someone took '1984', 'A Star Is Born' and 'The Rocky Horror Picture Show' and put them in a blender. I'm pretty sure this movie violates the Geneva conventions." Ezra laughs and so do you, leaning in to each other, giggles that become kisses, soft at first, but increasingly hungry, laced with need, your arms twine around his shoulders, his hand lingers at your side, toying with the hem of your shirt. "S'okay, Ez," you say as he nips at your jaw and then your neck, gentle graze of teeth that makes you shiver, "You can touch me." He kisses you deep, his tongue fever-hot against yours, hand sliding up the soft slope of your belly, cupping your breast, and you arch into his touch-- Tap Tap Tap. And there's a bright light shining through the passenger's side window. "Oh shit," says Ezra. You frantically yank your shirt back down, heat creeping up your neck, your cheeks, your earlobes flaming. "Movie's over guys," says the shadowed figure behind the flashlight's glare, "Take it someplace else." You open the door to switch places back with Ezra, the overhead light shows him red faced and horrified. "I'm sorry, I just--" "Get us out of here, Ez."

You stare out into the dark past the window, half-moon shining over fields and trees like a lazy eye. You snort laughter. "What's so funny?" "We got caught," you say, "We got caught necking at the drive-in like a couple of teenagers." "You're laughing because we got caught?" "I'm laughing because I've never made out with anyone at a drive-in, even when I was a teenager, and I'm laughing cause we got caught. After watching that trash-fire of a movie. We got caught making out over the end credits of 'The Apple'. I feel like we deserve some kind of award." You rest your hand on Ezra's leg, can just pick his smile in the dim lights from the dash. Ezra chuckles. "I never made out with anyone at the drive in before tonight either," says Ezra. "Bullshit," you say, and give him a good-natured poke. "It's true," he says, "For one, I didn't have access to a car. I would've had to borrow Ma's car, and there was no way that was ever going to happen. Also, I was not what the girls back then referred to as 'dating material'. Skinny as a rake with a mouthful of braces and an obvious birthmark? I was like a puppy trying to grow into it's ears and feet, a late bloomer if you will." You move your hand higher up along his thigh and give him a squeeze. "Better late than never." "Indeed."

Flash Gordon Trailer

The Apple Trailer

#writer wednesday #ezra x f!reader #ezra prospect x f!reader #ezra (prospect) x f!reader #ezra and cee

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