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#and then she'll let her frustration about that out at me (: not blaming my brother about that though like thats a her problem
airi-p4 · 4 months
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A deserved mistletoe
I wrote this for @lukacouffaineappreciation The 7 Days of Luka’s Christmas (super late, I know ^^;)
Dec. 24: Mistletoe
Summary: (Juleka's POV) Not wanting to see her brother hurt ever again, Juleka is protective of whoever approaches Luka with dubious intentions. What she didn't expect was for him falling in love with Marinette at first sight. What could she do now?
AO3
(Thank you @celestiall0tus for checking it for me!)
Enjoy?
_________________________
Deep down, Juleka knew she could blame no one but herself for the current situation. 
Years of hissing, deathly glares and a few stabbed voodoo dolls- all for nothing. Just because she had a slip. Because after the many attempts of boys and girls flirting and trying to date her brother she prevented, it didn't even cross her mind that his brother could be the one falling for someone for a change. Even worse, falling for a girl who had a crush on someone else- which is why she let her guard down in the first place... 
And now, Luka was full of sappy songs about Marinette and she could do nothing except for warning him. 
“You should forget about Marinette”
“Why?”
“She is in love with someone else”.
“I know. That's fine. I'm just happy spending time with her. And I'm happy she doesn't dislike spending time with me”
His words irked her. “Just forget about her, please!” 
Her words were useless. He kept playing those songs, messaging, chatting and hanging out with Marinette.
Didn't he get it!? That's what she had tried to prevent all these past years! Scaring all these people who approached Luka for either his looks, his talent or his kindness. Which became harder when he changed schools, but she still worked relentlessly for it. She did it to protect him from this. From heartbreak. And she had no doubts this love he was experiencing at the moment could end in nothing but that.
____________
After their first meeting, seeing Luka and Marinette together become more and more frequent. Juleka couldn't help it but feel both frustrated and irritated. Why wasn't he listening to her warnings!? 
She groaned and left a deep, unusual sigh.
“What's wrong, my love?” Rose approached, with a quick peck in the lips and sitting on her girlfriend’s lap. Juleka surrounded her closer with one arm around her waist and another on her upper legs. 
Juleka didn't answer, but the way she darted her eyes towards Luka and Marinette said enough. 
“They look so happy, don't they? They would make such a cute couple!” Rose squealed.
“No”
“No?” 
“I don't like it.” Rose blinked at her girlfriend’s bluntness.
“Why not? Don't you want him to be happy? With somebody?” 
“Of course I do, but that's impossible” Juleka’s teeth clenched against each other. 
“Why do you say so?” Rose blinked again.
“Because Luka is the best and most wonderful person I know. No one deserves him! He's too good for this world! He's too good for anyone!” 
“But-”
“When mom refused to tell us about dad, Luka was devastated. I don't want to see Luka like that ever again. I don't trust anyone. I want to protect him from heartbreak as much as I can!” Juleka explained with frustration.
“But he seems to like Marinette… isn't that a good thing?”
“No! Of course it's not!” Juleka's grip tightened around Rose’s inner thigh. “You've seen her with Adrien and her crush on him. She'll end up hurting Luka and I don't want it! I'm not going to let it happen!”
“But Juju, Marinette told us she was over Adrien and that she doesn't even understand what she saw in him anymore... She asked us to stop all our plans too, remember?”
“She could do that to Luka”
“You think so?” Rose cupped and caressed her girlfriend’s face. “I'd say she matured, don't you agree? Besides, she looks very happy around Luka. Both of them look happy. The happiest I've seen them in a while, actually”
Juleka knew Rose was right. Admitting it wasn't easy or pleasant, but it was too obvious to deny it. And she would never lie to her girlfriend.
“I know…no matter what I do to try to keep them from meeting or getting closer, they always manage to go back together. They're like satellites gravitating around each other and there's nothing I can do to make them stop. It's like going against the laws of physics: impossible. Which is why it frustrates me so much” she took a deep breath before continuing. “Luka deserves only the best. And that person doesn't exist.”
“But Juleka, you know Marinette! She's wonderful! She's kind, hard worker, creative and always willing to help others. Doesn't she deserve the best too?”
“Well…”
“I think if there's someone in this world who deserves Luka, that would be Marinette. And someone who deserves Marinette would be Luka. Look at them. How happy these two wonderful pair look together. Don't you think they deserve each other?”
Once again, she knew Rose was correct. If Luka was the best boy Juleka knew, Marinette was the kindest, most wonderful girl she knew (excluding Rose, of course). And, apparently, she had already moved on from that crush... She obviously matured, seeing how she handled her meetings with Luka now.
She wanted her brother to be happy. And maybe… maybe Marinette could make him happy, after all…
“Rose, would you help me with something?” Juleka softened.
“Of course!” Rose grinned knowingly, planting a kiss on cheek. 
__________
“Juleka?” Luka asked as his sister pulled him towards the back of the Liberty. “What-”
“Shh!” that's all Juleka said, and it was enough for him to shut up and follow her in silence.
She placed him at a certain spot. Alone. And he gave his sister a questioning look. “Hm?”
A moment later, Rose arrived, pushing Marinette towards where the siblings were. “Wait Rose- where are you- Oh” 
Rose stopped, making Marinette stand face to face with Luka. Both of them immediately smiled, and Rose grabbed Juleka's arm and left them on their own.
“Hi again” Luka smiled, in that soft way he always did only for Marinette.
“Hi” There was a blush on her face as she smiled softly, back at him. “Do you know what this is about?” she signaled their surroundings and the girls leaving.
“No clue” he giggled. Her own giggle in response to his made her bend a bit, so it forced her to look up and-
“Oh” the blush immediately intensified, leaving Luka curious. “Uhm…”
He understood it when he followed her eyes up. 
A mistletoe.
A million thoughts came to Luka's mind. Was this a way for Juleka to say she finally approved of Marinette for him? He had been aware of her doings for a long time, but for him, his sister always came first, so she let her do as she pleased. As long as she was happy... But then he met Marinette and his world became upside down with the new acquired feeling: love. He fell for her, and he knew it was forever, so he decided to become unusually selfish, going against his sister's wishes for the first time ever. And now, after weeks of showing disapproval, she was telling him he could date Marinette, giving him her blessings, by giving him a chance to kiss and confess to the girl he loved.
He was not going to waste it. 
He smiled kindly, happy and grateful for Juleka's approval, before his eyes locked on Marinette’s. He straightened his arm lightly, to hold her hand on his, making her blush even more and gaze down in embarrassment, looking at her hand on his and how well they fit together. 
Cute.
“Marinette” he called for her attention and she hummed to show she was listening. “Can I kiss you?”
“Eh!?” It didn't seem possible, but her blush intensified even more. He rubbed the back of her hand in a calming, reassuring way to ease her nerves and surprise. She breathed again, but her heartbeats were loud in her chest. Once grounded, thanks to his kind touch, and finally understanding this was reality and not the dream she’d had a thousand times, the answer to his question was easy. “Yes, please”
The way he beamed, his smile widening, made the butterflies in her stomach go crazy, but after that first agitated second, she found inner calm with the long-awaited contact. Their lips met halfway, the two gravitating pair finally crashing together by the powerful feeling of love warming them from heart to toes. No definition of the word “happiness” could ever be as accurate as what they felt at that moment.
The blush on Marinette remained when they separated, but her shyness was changed for the warmest smile he had ever seen on her. One that mirrored his. 
“Would you be my girlfriend, Marinette?” 
She answered with a big smile and jumped to give him a tight hug and kiss him again. 
___________________
“Marinette and I are dating,” Luka said, sitting next to her before dinner. “Thank you, Juleka” 
“Hm” she hummed at her glass of water and, after a long pause, she mumbled her biggest wish in a very low voice: “I hope you're happy forever”
Surprised, Luka turned to look at her with wide eyes. He could tell there was a rare, slight blush under the hair curtain covering his sister's face. He smiled fondly at her.
“I have the best sister, the best mother and the best girlfriend in the world. I'm the happiest. I can't ask for anything better”
Juleka drank some water to cover her blushy smile, just when a sudden message alert arrived at Luka's phone. The way he beamed left no doubt of who the sender was. The goth girl smiled fondly at her brother: seeing him happy made her happy too. “They really do deserve each other,” she thought.
Suddenly, she was a bit embarrassed of her own past protective behavior. Maybe she had been too much- and a bit jealous, too (even if she was never going to admit it). She should have known Luka had enough love for everyone- his sister, their mom and his new girlfriend included- and how kind hearted and good Marinette was. Now, she was proud of having contributed to their happiness. And as for the details of what happened under that mistletoe… she was pretty sure Rose would carry on with the questions and the squealing later.
Right now, Luka was all happy smiles and nothing else mattered.
FIN
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reina-royale · 11 months
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The most frustrating thing about Kim is how she's immune to criticism. Her apologies are almost always met with the other person apologizing, even when they shouldn't have to.
"But Kim apologizes and learns her lesson! She grows and matures past those things! It's not fair to hold it against her forever!"
Does she? Let's review:
"Bueno Nacho" - Apologizes for getting mad at Ron for outshining her at the job. Not for forging an application for him or guilting him into taking the job in the first place.
Bonus: This is the first of Kim's apologies, and she consistently apologizes for the most minor transgression of the episode, ignoring all the other ones.
"Attack of the Killer Bebes" - Says she'll support Ron because he's her best friend, but doesn't actually apologize.
"The New Ron" - Apologizes for saying Ron needs a new haircut. Not for forcing him into one. Not for not caring how much he hated it. Not for stealing his hat. Not for humiliating him. Tries to throw in a lesson at the end that it's what's on the inside that counts, ignoring that fact that she was the one who forced him to change in the first place.
Bonus: Once again, Kim only apologizes for the most minor transgression.
Bonus+: There's a scene where Kim gets mad at Ron for "abandoning" Rufus, but, having watched the episode recently, I can say that's not what happened; Ron, despite not having pockets, still carried Rufus around with him, Rufus wandered off on his own. Ron probably wasn't too worried because Rufus does that frequently. And he does gently chastise Rufus for wandering off anyways. Thus, Kim's anger at Ron was not justified, and likely just because she was looking for an excuse.
"Coach Possible" - Never actually apologizes for driving her brothers' soccer team so hard they cry. Doesn't apologize, but does get fired from a job she didn't want in the first place, and mopes about it.
"October 31st" - Doesn't apologize for the lying or putting other people in danger. Doesn't acknowledge that she was putting other people in danger.
Bonus: How would Monique's family react to finding out one of Monique's party guests destroyed their garage door? Probably not happy, and banning Kim from their property until she can pay off the replacement wouldn't seem unreasonable.
Bonus+: I doubt the people asking Kim to retrieve the Centurion Project would've been happy to find out how it got stuck to her in the first place. I imagine Kim would be getting much fewer retrieval jobs after that.
"The Twin Factor" - Doesn't apologize for using mind control on her brothers. Tries to justify it and, though her parents clearly disapprove, isn't punished for it.
"The Ron Factor" - This would have been a great episode about Kim learning she takes Ron for granted and apologizing, but instead, despite doing practically nothing in this episode, she still has credit handed to her.
Bonus: The Global Justice scientists said the results of their study into "The Ron Factor" were complete and that Ron was a non-factor, but there's a movie about how Ron is vital to Kim's success, so clearly this is false. Perhaps they meant they couldn't replicate it?
"Adventures in Rufus-Sitting" - Lies to Ron about how it went watching Rufus. Doesn't apologize for not taking it seriously. Doesn't apologize for accidentally endangering Rufus. Just lies to him about how it went.
Bonus: My sister has mentioned to me that how someone treats a pet says a lot about how they view the pet's owner. So Kim's treatment of Rufus says a lot about her opinion of Ron.
"Return to Wannaweep" - Doesn't apologize for not taking Ron's concerns seriously or sabotaging Bonnie. Even Dr. Lurkin apologizes for not taking Ron's concerns seriously. And then Ron tries to give a lesson about how if Bonnie and Kim weren't so busy competing with each other, one of them could have won the Spirit Stick, as though Kim and Bonnie are equally to blame for it.
Bonus: Someone who hasn't known Ron as long as Kim has, has enough respect for Ron to apologize to him, when Kim consistently fails to do so.
"Bonding" - Apologizes to Bonnie for an unintentional comment about Bonnie's weight, quicker than she's ever apologized to Ron, and more sincerely as well.
Bonus: Despite not actually intending to insult Bonnie, Kim still has enough respect for her to apologize. More than she usually does for Ron, her "best friend".
"Fashion Victim" - Apologizes to Monique for being jealous, but not the things she did that could have cost Monique her future in the fashion industry.
Bonus: If Monique was hassling Kim to break an NDA and trying to get a tech guy to find a loophole so she could, would we think Monique should be forgiven so easily?
And consistently doesn't apologize to Ron for dismissing his fears, concerns, and feelings.
So, Kim apologizing to Ron is very rare, almost non-existent.
It's been mentioned to me that some relationships don't require explicit apologies or that love means never having to say you're sorry.
I say that's stupid.
If you care about someone, and you hurt them, you should want to apologize and make things right. Even if it seems like you don't need to say it, you should still show you're remorseful in some way.
And Kim doesn't.
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yutadori · 2 years
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currently trying to ignore the very terrible aspects of my life as i eat a slice of this souffle roll cake i got from the store today ^__^
#AH!!!!! AH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#fuck man...... fuckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk#god . i want it to be spring already .#uoagdjddjdkx anyway today my brother said that he might be moving out in less than a month and he asked if i would be okay with#just my mom and i cant say no because i dont want to hold him back from moving outttt#and its just asssss its so assssssss#we're not thatttt close and it can get tense between ys but its going to be so much more lonely im going to probably go even more crazy <3#and my mom was going to visit her bf in REDACTED country but if he does move out she probably wont#and then she'll let her frustration about that out at me (: not blaming my brother about that though like thats a her problem#but godddd#and my mom just came into my room and basically said i cant do anything like UNPROMPTED....... pretty much . it was totally unrelated to th#argument we had but whatever . definitely does not help bc thats legiterally what ive been struggling w at work but whatever#anyway my life has been ass because it feels like all ive been doing is working or just being st home like i havent seen my friends in#a while and it sucks so bad and theres not much i can do about it#and i dont even want to think about school i was supposed to enroll for classes a month ago but idk everything#just seems so suskssjsnjsks like . my future feels more bleak than usual <3 esp now that my brother is moving out like idk how#shit is going to be financially uoaghhghh i wanted to start really saving for idk my future but#now idk how thats gonna go . lol . godddddddd#and im pretty sure some of my coworkers are super annoyed of me and i dont think im going to#last the 90 day probation im probably going to be fired in january <3v
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soft-boi-eli · 3 years
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Mcyts helping a trans masc after top surgry (part 2)
Tw:swearing, mentions of surgry, softness.
Karl
This sweet ass man.
You are just laying on your bed, well sitting really, when he came in.
He had a fuck ton of balloons. And a large box.
Karl seemed like a child on christmas.
Placing the balloons down he handed you the surprisingly light box.
He was gently bouncing as he waited for you to open it.
It shocked you how it even fit in the box.
It was a huge frog bed.
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You realized with a pillow you would be able to sleep in it perfectly.
"I knew it was uncomfortable sleeping like that so I got something that should make it a bit more comfortable."-karl
You loved it.
Sadly you couldnt use it till those drains were out though.
He was right though that was definitely more comfortable then laying on a bed only.
He didnt think it through though. And got sad when he wasn't able to fully cuddle you.
But he found out that he could lay on your lap and legs.
You both enjoyed it.
Also he might be a bit squeamish when it came to your chest drains but he was helpful with them.
He helped you clean them and your wounds, he was very, very gentle.
He didnt want to hurt you.
"You know it's ok to do it a little harder. It wont hurt."-(y/n)
"But I dont want to hurt you. I know this doesn't hurt."-karl.
It was sweet. But got kinda annoying sometimes when he couldnt get something off. But he never got angry or frustrated. Just kept very gentle.
I imagine that when he was cleaning your new scars, Jimmy came to see if you got his balloons and if you doing good.
You two were in the living room bowl of warm soapy water, in a large plastic bowl, and karl gently wiping off all of the crust around the scars.
You fell asleep before karl finished and karl was finishing up when jimmy came in.
"Karl. They're alseep."-jimmy
"Yeah but this needs to be cleaned. It doesn't hurt them."-karl
Jimmy and karl literally just sat there till you woke up.
You thanked jimmy for the balloons and thanked karl for helping you clean those wounds.
Karl didnt mind though. Cause this sweet heart cares for you and just wants you to feel better and feel comfortable.
Quackity
He loves you and all but dont expect him to help with the surgical sight.
He'll do everything for you except clean your wounds and drain those drains.
He loves to hug you and kept you warm.
He would stream but you were always behing the green screen so no one would see you.
"Alex. Can you get me to book I left in the living room. I feel like shit still."-(y/n)
He was very quick to get it. And I mean he bolted out got it and brought it in the span of a minute. He gave you a light kiss on the forehead, and whispered.
"Anything for you mi amoir."-quackity.
You gave him a smile.
"Simp."-(y/n)
He gasped offended and looked at you.
"Well only for you though."-quackity.
I imagine as a get well gift quackity would get you something to remind you of him when he streams.
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Large duck push.
He knew that his streams could last a long time so he decided it was best if you had a snuggle buddy to help you stay in position.
If the duck got dirty he was cleaned nearly immediately by quackity.
If the duck falls off the bed quackity gently yeets it onto the bed where you can reach.
He might of gotten jealous of the duck a few times. But he seemed to get over it when you went to hugging him instead. Sadly it wasnt that easy to but still none the less you gave him hugs too.
Dont neglect you quack boi.
He needs hugs like you do.
Give them to him. These are the only times you get cuddles. Other then that he is making food, getting you comfy, and fixing your pillows and shit like that.
He is now a maid.
Not sexually though. He just cleans the house, get you things you need, and makes food.
He is helpful.
Just not with the cleaning process of your wounds. And that's fine. He keeps you comfy and that's all that matters.
Also if your cold in the middle of hot ass summer and asking for more blankets he would look at you crazy. Like what the fuck?
But you have them lightly fluttered over you.
He wants you comfy. Even if that means you looking like your boiling alive in the middle of july.
If your happy he's happy. That's how it goes
Badboyhalo
Badboyhalo?
More like dadboyhalo.
He is not going to let you do anything.
Your surgical incisions? He's cleaning them.
Your drains? He's got you.
Your getting alot of soup and smoothies. He even joins in on your so called diet so you wont get jealous about what he has.
Rat is all over you. Sensing the pain you were having and cuddling you completely. Your laps is almost always taken by rat.
Badboyhalo doesn't really care if rat gets alot of attention by you. He just wants you to be comfortable.
But sometimes he gets sad that he cant fully lay with you.
But he enjoys just sitting with you and talking through the nights you cant really sleep.
He gets you a stuffed cat, you use it mainly as a pillow and sometimes hug it when bad is streaming.
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"It reminded me of you when I saw it."-bad
Your heart melted.
He loved your reactions to the little sweet gesters he did. It brought him joy to know you were able to relax and trust him at this moment and time.
You get a free swearing pass. He knows you hurt really bad at times but he lightly says language when on stream.
You understood though. He had kids watching too.
You were grumpy one day, bad took rat because of a rat cam stream. And all you wanted was to be warmed up by something else then a blanket.
You were sittinging there looking at bad as he streamed.
You could technically get up and grab rat but he my tell you not to.
So you quietly patted your lap.
Rat immediately seemed to notice and run over to you, jumping onto the bed and laying in your lap.
You felt accomplished and tired so you fell asleep.
Rat leaving made the chat confused but bad explained that you were healing from a surgery.
Chat wished you a good recovery and told bad to go and comfort you. Even though you were asleep.
He tried to explain it but the donations kept yelling at him.
So he ended stream and laid next to you and rat.
This was comfortable.
Eret
Eret, they were a whole 'nother story.
This fabulous being is like a maid service in one.
They have two outfits they wore when you were upset.
A maid outfit and a butler outfit.
You just got home, you were in pain, sitting up and swaddled in blankets and Goose was trying to smother you at this point.
Eret was streaming and you were sitting there in the background, blankets, pain, and goose exsiting.
You didnt know eret was talking about you because you were falling asleep. Eret nor you expected what their followers did.
Her door was bombarded with packages addressed to you. Decorated with words about getting well soon, that they were proud of you, even some saying you were their rolemodle.
Eret decided to have a stream of you opening them.
Let's just say alot of them were food, candies, even foreign food and drinks. Someone made you a homemade blanket in the trans colors.
Best part about that blanket, it was heated.
You were using it immediately as you were freezing.
Eret just chuckled and rubbed your shoulder as you opened them.
Needless to say they are proud of you, happy that you were one huge step closer to who you were.
All they wanted was your happiness.
Niki
She's a sweetheart.
Need I say more?
Well I will because fuck you I can.
Constant cuddles, be it only her head in your lap, it is almost always happening.
When you have to take your pain meds she is instantly on it, do you want soup or a smoothie? You cant decide? She'll make it a surprise.
If you dont live with her then you're staying with her while you are recovering. She doesn't want you alone when you are in pain.
You'll be bedridden until she thinks you're okay.
If she deems you as not fit for doing something she's on it. Drop you glasses for reading/drawing/writing/typing. You bet your ass as soon as she heard that clack and you groan she's picked it up and it's on your lap.
Also makes sure you're good with streaming.
If you say your good with it that day it's a calm stream. There is no lore happening when you're healing everyone was fine with that due to the fact that niki would have to sit out and the lore was with her as well so that couldn't happen.
Will came to visit...
Saw you, took pity, and now you're stuck with two people showering you in affection and comfort.
You saw Wilbur as a brother. And wilbur saw you as his younger brother. So he literally felt the pain when he saw you wince.
Niki thought it was cute and comforted both of you.
Anyways she saw something before your surgery and decided that you needed it.
It would make you feel better.
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It made you laugh.
You regretted laughing but loved the hoodie.
It fit so well and it was beautiful, you also were thinking about buying it one day because you could.
But niki beat you to it.
Wilbur didnt stop laughing.
I mean who blames him.
You literally just Yeeted your tits. And niki got you something that said yeet right on top of it.
It worked perfectly.
Also when niki's not cuddling you zuko is.
End of story, you're seriously stuck with cuddles no matter what. Be it from an animal or a human.
Wilbur wont cuddle you more of give you head pats.
Niki normally streamed with you there with her unless lore stream.
So when the second day after your surgery, she had streamed, and you weren't there her chat started asking questions. Wondering if you were good, if something happened.
That's when you raised from your dead sleep, zuko falling off your stomach, shirtless, just to go grab some sock as your toes felt like they would fall off.
Chat seemed relived but started questioning the binder and all that.
Niki explained that you got top surgery and that you were healing still.
"He's looking like he wants to die right now. Are you sure he's fully okay?"-dono
"Yeah I'm good. Just stubbed my toe as well."-you.
Niki was quick to rush over and help you back to the bed.
"Just sit down I'll get you your water hun."-niki
She was quick to fill your bottle up and place it next to you on the table next ot the bed.
She's such a big help not matter what honestly.
She loves you and will do anything for you.
I am sorry this took so long. Just had a very unstable mental state. Also sorry if they seem oc. I'm once more not on a good mental state and have been trying to work on this.
So yeah if I dont post in a bit I'm so sorry just stressing alot. Insomnia is kicking me so hard.
My grandma broke her foot, she's all good though.
And I have taken up most things in my house as I live with both my mother and grandmother still.
But yeah I apologize for the break just gonna try to let myself get better. It might take a bit. It might be quite short I dont know. I just need to get more sleep.
Eli is very tired now. Bye.
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Text
Mist | Choi San | Chapter 4
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Pairing: Choi San x OC (Seohyun)
Genre: supernatural (ghost), romance, high school
Trigger Warnings: paranormal, death mentions, violence
Words: 6.6k
Disclaimer: I do not own anything except my original character and the story. I do not own any gifs or pictures used.
Full story on Wattpad (don’t spoil here if you read there too)
chapter directory
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Seohyun was waiting for Jiwoo for quite a while now, sitting on the desk in her room, doodling in her notebook. She sighed as she shut it, a bit frustrated. It was not like Jiwoo to leave her hanging.
Seohyun considered going out; it was highly likely that Jiwoo was at their usual spot- the park near the school, her home, or the accident site. It was about 10 pm. Wasn't that late, was it? She got up, but stopped.
Maybe Jiwoo needed space.
It was probably this, but Seohyun couldn't help fearing that she had just moved on. If she'd gotten her memories back, that could mean that she was a whole different person now. She might not be the Jiwoo she knew anymore.
Seohyun fell on her bed, staring at the wall, and suddenly felt goosebumps.
"Took you long enough," Seohyun said, not bothering to look at Jiwoo, who had just entered the room.
"Don't tell me you were waiting for me," Jiwoo smirked.
"Oh, why would I?" Seohyun smirked back, and made space for Jiwoo, who sat on the bed with her. "So?"
"So, my dear friend," Jiwoo began, clearly excited to tell her her life story.
And she did. She was Ahn Jiwoo, daughter to two loving parents and a sister to a 16 year old brother. She'd had a pretty normal life; her father was a finance manager and her mother a housewife, and she had a lot of friends during her school years too. The rumours about her father being some sort of criminal were wrong; she had to face those rumours in her life too. They had her confused with another Jiwoo in her class.
"So we were a group of four friends; 2 boys and 2 girls. I was kind of a rebel in my last few months of life, because I just found life boring. I wanted an adventure. Something new. I wanted to travel too. So I was suggesting to my friends that we should do something. They were all busy in their own ways, and I didn't understand. I kept bugging them. So when we were in that restaurant, we had an argument. I knew it was my fault. I stormed off, and I was just about to go back when I got hit by a car."
"Oh... so then you went to the hospital, and they found out you lost your memories?"
"Right," she said, "But I was already in a critical condition. Brain damage led me to death."
"Ah..." Seohyun stared at her. Jiwoo's eyes were sad as she told her this, but she looked content. "So the reason you stayed..."
"The reason I stayed was not one, but two. I wanted to make sure my friends didn't blame themselves and my parents had moved on. And I spent the whole day making sure that was the case."
"And the other reason?"
"I want an adventure," she said and smiled brightly.
"Ugh, you ghosts! You stay for the most stupid reasons!" Seohyun mocked and dramatically threw her head in her hands, which made Jiwoo hit her with a pillow until she was laughing.
"That's my last wish, Seohyun. You think you could do that for me? Go on an adventure with me?"
"Haven't you had enough of adventure though? I mean, living with me is an adventure in itself-"
"I already talked to San," Jiwoo said, catching her attention. "He actually thought it was a nice idea. So we're going on an adventure this week. He said he'll make it a surprise for me."
"Hey, hey, that's not fair? You didn't even ask me!"
"I didn't have to," Jiwoo flipped her red hair.
------------
"I don't know why I ever agreed to this," Seohyun sighed, handing her bag to Wooyoung who put it with the other few bags.
"Stop being a boomer and get in," Wooyoung said, and Seohyun did, muttering how she should have never suggested this.
"Should've thought before you planned all of it," Jongho snickered and Seohyun shot a glare.
"Everybody's in?" Hongjoong asked and they looked at each other, shouting a yes. Hongjoong gave a thumbs up and took the front seat of the van after shutting the door.
Everyone, including Jiwoo, who couldn't stop smiling, were seated. Seohyun had asked her mom to lend her a van that could fit 10 people, and though her mom had raised her brows in question, she had agreed when Seohyun said it was a trip with friends. She had just been surprised she had friends that were not ghosts, so without further questions (quite conveniently) she agreed, on the condition that the driver would be someone from the company.
She did raise a question when she found out that she was the only girl in the whole group, and there were only 9 people. Seohyun finally told her she was doing a favour for a ghost who had saved her life, and her mother made her promise she'd tell her the story someday.
They were going to Muchangpo Beach. They decided they'd see the sunset there. It was close to Seoul and the only place they could afford to travel and have an 'adventure'. They'd have a fun time, the boys promised, saying everything was fun when they were together.
Jiwoo was sitting between San and Wooyoung, and the three of them were chatting. Seohyun smiled when she saw that San was her voice; he'd say whatever she had to say.
She herself was in the middle row with Seonghwa and Yeosang by her sides. The two of them were also half bent backwards, listening to whatever the three of them were talking about. Seohyun had plugged her earphones in but she wasn't playing any music yet. She just listened to them talk.
"Tell us something about Seohyun," Wooyoung asked, giggling. Seohyun smiled inwardly.
"Well, Seohyun," Jiwoo thought, "she's quite rude, isn't she?"
"She's quite rude, isn't she?" San did his job, and the five of them laughed.
"She's not that rude,~" Seonghwa casted a glance at her, sighing in relief when he thought she couldn't hear him. Seohyun bit her cheek from the inside to stop smiling.
"She's scared of crows, of all thing," Jiwoo revealed, and the boys laughed a little. "She'll never show it, but when more than three crows are around, she runs for her life."
"Ah, I haven't ever noticed," Yeosang said, rubbing his chin, "she can hide it really well."
"Tell us some ghost story," Wooyoung asked. He was clearly enjoying this.
"I have a good one!" Jiwoo exclaimed and everyone seemed to scoot closer. "There was once a boy about her age who had the most stupid reason to not move on."
San almost stopped as he narrowed his eyes at Jiwoo and she assured him it was not Joon Hyuk. So San told the boys, and asked them to guess.
"He wanted an adventure too?" Yeosang laughed.
Jiwoo pouted, but said it could fall in that category, but it was a different sort of adventure. She told them to let their imagination run wild.
As San told the boys, Seohyun decided this was her cue to interrupt. "We are NOT going to talk about that!"
Wooyoung screamed a little in surprise. "Weren't you listening to music?!"
Jiwoo was just laughing and Seohyun bared her teeth at her, making everyone laugh and wonder just what sort of adventure did the boy want. After a hundred pleads from the boys, Seohyun finally told them that it didn't actually happen; she just threatened the ghost in unimaginable ways, making him move on without his desire.
"I think I have an idea of what happened," Yeosang thought, amusement in his eyes, "But I am too afraid to voice it out."
"I think you got it then," Seohyun nodded in approval and Yeosang gaped at her.
"You got it tough, friend," he said, patting her shoulder to comfort her. San and Wooyoung were pouting very loudly, and Seonghwa just stared at Yeosang and Seohyun as understanding passed between them.
"You both are so weird," Seonghwa finally said.
"If I tell you, Seonghwa, you'll drown in shame. Better protect your ears and your pure mind," Seohyun grinned.
San and Wooyoung exchanged glances, frowning, but they shook their head. It couldn't be that bad. Could it?
Seohyun plugged her earphones again, deciding she'd take a nap and actually played music this time.
-----------
"We're here!"
Seonghwa shook her awake, and Seohyun slowly opened her eyes, her hand going in front of her eyes as she blocked the sunlight. She took off her earphones and the sound of waves hit her, making her smile. She adjusted her green dress that reached below her knees, and put her hat on.
She saw that Jiwoo was already out, running along the beach, and San was watching her with a smile on his face. He turned back, meeting eyes with Seohyun, who suddenly felt out of breath.
San was handsome- painfully handsome. And the plain white shirt he wore didn't help. His hair was flying due to the breeze and he ran a hand through them, cocking his head to the side as he watched her.
The sun making his skin glow didn't help either.
Seohyun cleared her throat and joined him, and they both watched Jiwoo, in her jeans and green T shirt that she had died in- her permanent outfit, running as freely as she could, her red hair flowing behind her, her laugh ringing in the air.
"I didn't know she'd be that happy to see the beach. Hasn't she been here before?" Seohyun asked.
"I think she has. She knew the way. And I'm almost suspicious she's doing this just to annoy you," San answered.
As if on cue, Jiwoo stopped, doing a weird dance, then started twerking-
"And that's our cue to look away," Seohyun grabbed San, now laughing, by his arm and went to join the others. "They didn't have to come. They can't see her."
"We figured out a way to enjoy with her even if we can't see her," San smirked.
And that was how, a few moments later, they all were assembled in a circle playing cards.
"Why do I think San and Seohyun are cheating on us with Jiwoo?" Yunho looked at them suspiciously.
"How do you think the cards are in the air?" Seohyun asked, and Yunho grinned. She had a point. To anyone who could not see Jiwoo, it would look like a bunch of cards were in the air.
"I WON!" Jiwoo smacked the final card and jumped in the air. Seohyun gaped at her.
"You cheated!" She shouted.
"I was sitting with you the whole time, don't give me that shit," Jiwoo smirked.
San told them that she had, indeed, won without cheating and everybody groaned. Mingi dragged the food basket and him and Jongho started spreading the food.
"Can she really not eat?" Jongho asked.
"I'm afraid not," Seohyun answered.
"Isn't it rude to eat in front of a ghost?" Jiwoo put her hands on her hip and Seohyun popped a cherry in her mouth, saying, "It is."
San scoffed. Jiwoo kicked Seohyun's leg lightly and said she was going to walk. The rest of them started to eat.
"I heard the sunset here is very pretty," Seonghwa said.
"I've been here before," Mingi took a bite of his sandwich, "It really is the prettiest."
After eating a little, Seohyun looked in the distance where Jiwoo was standing near the shore, the waves flowing near her. Jiwoo looked back and started walking towards them, then stopped halfway and gestured at them to come.
"She's calling us," San said, and they all got up, joining Jiwoo.
"I want to play in the water," Jiwoo said.
"What's stopping you?" Seohyun asked.
"With you all, you dumbass," Jiwoo laughed and took her hand, leading her to the shore.
"Hey, hey, easy there," Seohyun laughed and let out a little yelp as the waves hit her bare feet. "The water is so cold!"
Jiwoo bent down and sprayed the water on Seohyun, smirking.
"Oh no, you did not!" Seohyun bent down and sprayed back before she could run. And so started a battle of getting each other wet. They all forgot all their worries for a while, running around in the waves, laughing as loudly as they could, laughing even louder when one of them got Jiwoo. By the time it got darker, they were all quite wet.
Yunho and Yeosang ran back to get towels for everyone, throwing them one each, and wondering if Jiwoo should have a towel. Seohyun said there was no need, but Jiwoo snatched hers once she was done.
"The sunset's here, guys," Yeosang said.
They all stood silently, side by side, watching the sky change to brilliant shades of candy, the sun reflecting on the sea. It was breathtakingly beautiful. At some point, Jiwoo crossed her hand with Seohyun's, and she turned to look at her face. Her red hair shone brightly and her eyes were wet.
"I want it to be the last thing that I see before I go," Jiwoo almost whispered. Seohyun's heart sank in her knees. It was really happening.
Jiwoo looked at San and smiled widely, San smiled back and waved at her. Jiwoo asked him to tell everyone that she was thanking them for doing so much for her. They all assured her it was nothing, and said they were gonna miss her.
San looked at Seohyun, nodding and urged the others to come with him. Only Jiwoo and Seohyun remained now, facing the sunset.
"It's really happening," Jiwoo finally said. A cry of pain escaped Seohyun's mouth. She couldn't take it anymore. Jiwoo rubbed her hand comfortingly, making her face herself. "You've given me an adventure. The time I spent with you, that was enough. Today was for you, Seohyun."
"Are you serious?" Seohyun asked.
Jiwoo nodded. "I told everyone it was for me, but no. It was for you. A gift for helping me out so much. For being a friend. A little sister that I always wanted."
Seohyun smiled sadly, "I'm gonna miss you so, so much. I got used to you, I shouldn't have."
"I know," Jiwoo smiled, kissing her forehead and wrapping her in a hug. Seohyun closed her eyes and inhaled. "Don't cry on me right now, Seohyun."
Seohyun laughed a little. "I'm trying not to, you're making it harder by reminding me!" She opened her eyes and saw the boys, watching them from a distance.
"I hope you'll open your heart more, Seohyun. That's my last wish. You had a tough life, but you have so many people, dead and alive, who love you. I hope you remember that, always."
"Unnie..." A tear escaped Seohyun.
Jiwoo watched the sunset, Seohyun in her arms, and it was perfect.
She closed her eyes.
----------------
Seohyun felt it, felt her presence fade away. She was no longer hugging Jiwoo. She stood for a few seconds before finally collapsing on the sand and she shuddered as tears began to flow. She put her face in her hands and cried her heart out.
The boys approached her, sitting around her, rubbing her back, telling her that it was okay. She just cried and cried, and she knew she was letting go of Joon Hyuk along with Jiwoo too. The proper goodbye that she had so badly wanted, she finally got it.
San put her arms around her and brought her closer, caressing her hair. After a few minutes, she was out of tears. She let her hair cover her face as she rested her head on San's shoulder, trying to normalize her breath.
Jongho handed her a water bottle. She managed a smile and took a few sips, rubbing her eyes. The boys looked at each other. They weren't sure what they should do next.
"God damn me if I ever befriend a ghost again," Seohyun said and finally laughed, making everyone else laugh along.
"Are you okay?" Hongjoong asked.
"Yes, I am, actually," she said, wiping her eyes again. "I'm done crying for a while now." Her eyes went to San, who understood and smiled.
"Alright, let's get some dinner."
-----------
The driver had dropped Seohyun home now, and was on the way to drop the rest of them. As Seohyun entered her home, it felt strange. She felt utterly alone now that she knew Jiwoo wasn't gonna be back ever.
She tried to recall the time, only a few months ago, when she hadn't met Jiwoo yet. What did she even do in her spare time? She could not remember.
Seohyun went in her room and changed into her PJs first. After she combed her hair and scrolled a bit, she got up to turn off the light and saw something lying on her desk.
It was a painting. Of Jiwoo and her, cheek to cheek, smiling, the black cat in their arms. Seohyun gasped a little and examined it. It was really well drawn. Who made it?
She turned the page and saw something written on the back of it:
Seohyun,
I remember now that I loved painting. Since we don't have any photos, I captured us in this painting. Now you have a photo!
Love always, Jiwoo unnie ^^
Seohyun laughed a little as she read how she had addressed herself. "I guess you really liked being called unnie," she thought out loud.
She set the painting on her bookshelf. After being content with its position, she turned off the light, and slept surprisingly peacefully throughout the night.
------------
"I swear to god if you don't make fun of me when I do something stupid, I'm never gonna talk to you all again."
"Well, that's new," Yeosang commented, "You're begging for it now."
"Better that then you all being like this!" Seohyun let out a frustrated sigh.
The boys were being ridiculously sensitive with Seohyun, and she was feeling absolutely uncomfortable. She hadn't noticed it the first two days, but then she noticed in the little things; how they'd always offer her food before eating themselves, how they'd always accompany her, etc. She had enough of the special treatment.
"You're acting like someone died," Seohyun said.
"Back at it with the dead jokes are you?" San shook his head.
"Technically, Jiwoo was dead," Jongho remarked.
"So did she die twice then?" Mingi wondered.
"Oh please," Seohyun sighed again, "I just want you all to act like we used to. No more special treatment. Please, this makes it worse. I'm already at terms with Jiwoo going. It was bound to happen."
"Alright, alright," Seonghwa said and shushed her. "We didn't know what else we could do. Back to normal, okay?"
"Thank you," Seohyun truly meant it. "Also, I think I'm ready to share my drums." The boys hooted except one.
"Are you angry?" Mingi asked. Seohyun immediately turned to San, who was suddenly interested in Wooyoung's fingernails.
"Now I am," Seohyun muttered, and San smiled without meeting her eyes. The teacher came and interrupted their session, so they went back to studying.
After school was over, the boys decided to go to their warehouse, while Seohyun asked if anyone would help her bring the drums. San volunteered and they walked to her home, the black cat in San's hand.
As they walked, talking about how it looked like the cat missed Jiwoo, San stopped in his tracks. "I think you have a guest."
Seohyun looked ahead and saw a middle aged man dressed like a doctor. He was a ghost. Seohyun shared a look with San and went ahead.
"How can I help you?" Seohyun asked. The ghost got startled when he saw that San could see him too.
Jiwoo had once explained that to ghosts, Seohyun shined a little brighter than the rest of the humans, which was how they knew. Seohyun had just thought she was crazy but now she realized, now that she was with San, that it must be true.
Or maybe Jiwoo hadn't been joking that one time when she said there was a banner on top of her head and every ghost could see it, only Seohyun couldn't.
"I was told you'd help me," the doctor said. Seohyun nodded and he continued. "I made a mistake. I operated on a patient and it went wrong. It was my fault. The patient lost his vision. They were going to sue me, but when I tried to settle it, we had an argument. They gave up on suing me, saying I wasn't even worth the trouble.
"It was a few days later. I went into a slump and started drinking a lot. I was on the roof of the hospital and it wasn't my intention, but I slipped. That's how I died."
"I'm sorry to hear that," Seohyun said, "How can I help you move on then?"
"I want to let the patient know that I truly am sorry, and I want to let my family, just my family know that it wasn't a suicide. I wouldn't leave them behind on purpose."
"But... isn't it easier for your family this way? Than knowing that you are now a ghost? That it wasn't an accident?"
"I think," San began, "that he's right. It's more easier for them if they know he didn't commit suicide. They'd feel really bad if they think he left them on purpose. No one wants that from the people they love."
The doctor smiled thankfully at San. "I'll take you to the patient first," he said and asked if he should teleport the two of them.
"Do you want to come? You don't have to," Seohyun said.
San stroked the cat's head. "I want to."
"I don't know if it's safe for San to teleport. So we'll take the mundane route. Lead the way, sir."
"It's quite a distance. I hope you have money for taxi," the doctor said.
On the way to the patient's house, they had a nice chat with the doctor. He told them about his life, back when he was famous for being a good surgeon. He had never made a mistake and he had always held pride in that. But with this particular patient, he took a risk he knew he shouldn't have.
He told them he had a 10 year old daughter and he wanted her to become a doctor too. He wanted her to know that it was good to save people, and she shouldn't be afraid to take risks but also be careful at the same time and know her limits.
Seohyun was actually touched by the whole thing. It was good to have ghosts like these once in a while; nice, well-mannered ghosts.
They reached the patient's house. It was in a posh area; the patient himself must be rich. The house looked more like a mansion from the outside. Upon ringing the doorbell, a woman appeared, who the doctor told them was his wife. She seemed to be past 50s.
"We're relatives of Dr. Lee, the one who operated on your husband. We're here to discuss things about the case."
The woman passed them a skeptical look, "The doctor passed away, didn't he? We gave up on the case altogether. What do you want now?"
"We just want to talk to Mr. Cho. It's important. Please."
The woman let them in, guided them to the chairs in the garden and said she'd bring her husband. San and her sat down, admiring the lush gardens. The doctor paced worriedly.
"It will be alright. I have a way with words," Seohyun assured the doctor.
The husband and wife arrived; San and Seohyun got up and greeted them respectfully. "I am Seohyun, Dr. Lee's distant relative. This is San, my cousin."
"Have a seat," he said and they all settled down, including the wife. Seohyun sighed and decided she'd get to the point.
"Dr. Lee made a mistake. You must know that," Seohyun said. The wife looked at her husband worriedly.
"So he says," Mr. Cho said, staring in the distance.
"He wants to apologize, sincerely. I'll get to the point. He's here right now. I can see ghosts, the dead who have not moved on. He had unfinished business here, because he wanted to sincerely apologize. He won't be able to move on until he hears your forgiveness."
"Is this a prank?" Mrs. Cho asked, but Mr. Cho shushed her.
"I hope you can prove he's here," Mr. Cho said.
"Dr. Lee told you about some ginseng plant right before you went under anesthesia. No one was there when he told you, right?"
"That's true," Mr. Cho smiled. His wife began to complain but he raised a hand. "That's interesting. My father had a friend. He could see ghosts too. Are you the Mediator?"
San and Seohyun looked at each other in surprise. "That's what they call me, yes."
Mr. Cho laughed a little. "I used to not believe my father and that friend of his for the longest time, until I saw something and couldn't believe my eyes. That's why I believe you too, girl. You're doing a good job."
"Thank you," Seohyun said.
"So Dr. Lee is here? I can speak directly to him?"
"Yes sir."
"Alright. Dr. Lee, it was your fault, I know. But I truly forgive you. There are things we cannot avoid. We call it fate or destiny. What's bound to happen, fortune or misfortune, happens and you cannot avoid it. That's what I believe. I want you to move on, without the burden of my accident holding you back. You didn't do it on purpose, and that is enough for me."
Tears escaped Mrs. Cho's eyes and she wiped them. Seohyun muttered to San, 'wise man', and they watched Dr. Lee's eyes shine with tears to as he said his apology and thanks. Seohyun conveyed the message.
They were offered tea, but Seohyun told them they had to get home. The man offered to help Seohyun out if she ever had trouble with this Mediator job. She accepted, saying she would pay a visit someday.
The three of them left the house, standing in the street and reflecting on what had happened.
"That went rather smoothly," Seohyun commented.
"I know!" San widened his eyes at her.
"Thank you, Seohyun. It really does feel like a burden off my shoulder."
"No problem, we should move now. What's the next job?"
"I don't think I can see them like this," the doctor said. "I love my daughter and my wife very much. Seeing them would want me to stay. Do you think I can write a letter to my wife? You can give it to her tomorrow."
"Will your wife believe that it was really written by you?"
"We had a secret code between us; we created it. If I mention it in the letter, she'll have to believe it. And she'll recognize my handwriting too."
San and Seohyun decided that was convenient, and Seohyun handed the doctor a pen and paper. He wrote a short one, muttering something about how the less he wrote the better it would be. Then he folded it and handed it to Seohyun.
"I trust you. You'll give the letter tomorrow, right? I wrote the address on the other page."
"I will deliver it personally."
"Thank you," the doctor smiled. "Do you think I'll be able to watch over my daughter?"
"Maybe you will," Seohyun said.
"Guardian angel," San added, making the doctor smile as he disappeared. He had moved on.
"Well," Seohyun said, "That was quick. I love it when ghosts are wise enough to actually know how to handle their mess."
San scoffed. "Let's go."
-------------
Grabbing some coffee from a café they passed by, they took a taxi to Seohyun's home. Seohyun insisted that they should eat before they packed the drums and go to the warehouse. San helped her set the table. She had made pasta last night, which she reheated, and had some chocolates for dessert.
"Does your mom ever come home?" San asked as he nibbled on the chocolate.
Seohyun yawned. San reflected. They both were tired and sleepy now. "She has an apartment near her office so she only comes once a week here."
San yawned again and Seohyun laughed. "Should I let you nap?"
San smiled lazily. "Let's just pack the drums while you're still angry. I don't want you to change your mind."
Seohyun threw the wrapper at him and he caught it before it hit his face, throwing it right back. She dodged it. "Come on, let's dismantle it."
It took them ten minutes to dismantle and pack the drums. But it was already night time, and the boys had locked the warehouse and gone home when San asked them.
"Well, I'll call them here tomorrow. They should take it if they want it so much."
"Good idea." San said, yawning again.
"I think if I let you go home now, you're gonna fall asleep in the middle of the road. Take a power nap, San."
"Oh no, I shouldn't. I'll just go," he said and walked past her, only to be grabbed by the arms and led to a room despite him insisting he was not THAT sleepy.
San entered the room and immediately knew it was Seohyun's. The potted plants, the books, the mess. And the painting.
"So that's the painting, eh," he said, walking towards it and looking at the detail, absolutely wowed by it.
"How do you know? I don't think I mentioned," Seohyun narrowed her eyes.
"Jiwoo told me she left a gift for you," he smiled. Seohyun went to stand with him, looking at the painting with him.
"She's really good," she said.
San looked down at her. She felt so small; he was about a head taller than her. He turned towards her, his hand going to play with her hair. "You're really okay, right?"
"I am, San," Seohyun assured him. "I do feel lonely when I'm home, but you guys make up for it everyday."
San nodded. He was still playing with her hair. Seohyun suddenly flushed; they were standing quite close to each other. San noticed her looking at him, her light brown eyes shining.
He seemed to be searching her eyes for something. And Seohyun wasn't sure what it was, but she felt her heart pumping louder every second. She was, oh god, she was so attracted to him. He made her feel so many things just by looking at her.
"What are you looking at?" Seohyun asked- almost whispered.
"You," San said, bringing his hand to cup her face, surprised when she leaned in to his touch and closed her eyes. It made him melt. He brought her in for a hug and she gladly wrapped her arms around his waist, his small waist. She could hear his heart beat just as loudly. San rested his face on her head, rocking them back and forth. He didn't want to let go, he wanted to stay like this as long as he could.
Seohyun sighed. All she could think about was how he felt. Her mind was truly blank.
San finally broke apart a little, Seohyun's arms still around his waist. He was staring at her, his hands cupping her face, putting stray hair behind her ears. Seohyun wanted to do the same to him, but at the same time she didn't want to let go of him.
"Seohyun, Seohyun," he whispered, loving the sound of her name on his lips. She bit her lip. It seemed like they just stared at each other for the longest time, afraid to say anything, until Seohyun smiled at the situation.
San kissed her forehead first, a light peck. When she didn't move away, he tilted her face a bit upwards to kiss her cheekbone, then her cheek, leaving butterfly kisses, making her tremble all over. She clenched his shirt tighter, out of breath already. Their noses brushed and she loved the feeling of it, his breath warm on her. And when their lips brushed, San finally kissed her properly.
And Seohyun's mind went blank.
San's hand went behind her neck and Seohyun finally left his waist, only to cup his face herself as she guided him along. They tasted chocolate on each other. Seohyun was deepening the kiss, she just couldn't get enough. San mirrored her movements, following along, making her bend backwards until her back hit the desk and her hand went to rest on it for support.
San broke apart to catch his breath. His eyes were glazed, and so were Seohyun's. He put his hand on Seohyun's, the one that was on the desk, and with a sultry look and half a smile, he kissed her again, so passionately that it made Seohyun curve back and back until San was half on top of her.
When they broke apart, finally short of breath, Seohyun smirked. "I thought you were sleepy."
"I still am," he said, resting her forehead against her and smiling, eyes shut.
Seohyun lead him to her bed, making him sit. She bit her lip and smirked as she positioned herself on San's lap. San held her by her waist and let her kiss him; on his cheeks, like he had done, a peck on his nose which made him laugh, and finally a kiss to the lips.
"God, the way you make me feel, Choi San!" She sighed dramatically.
"And how do I make you feel?" He questioned. Seohyun shook her head. "I'll tell you later. Now we sleep."
San set his alarm for a power nap and with Seohyun in her arms, they both slept peacefully. When the alarm did go off, Seohyun didn't budge. With a kiss on her forehead, he left the house.
----------
"There's something wrong with Seohyun," Yeosang announced and everyone turned to look at him.
"There's more?" Wooyoung asked sarcastically and Seohyun glared at him, turning to look at Yeosang, asking him what he meant by that.
"I don't know," Yeosang threw his hands in the air, clearly frustrated, "She keeps smiling to herself. It's creepy."
Seohyun and San shared a look and San, despite his struggle not to, burst out laughing. Seohyun pursed her lips, trying not to smile but failed.
"See?" Yeosang pointed at her, "Has she ever smiled like this?"
Wooyoung was looking at San and Seohyun. "You both.... Is there a secret I don't know about!?"
"I don't have secrets anymore..." Seohyun lied shamelessly, shrugging. San put his hands in the air and said, "I only laughed because of what Yeosang said."
"No, you're looking at each other with the most disgusting look in your eyes," Yeosang observed, "Don't tell me you two..."
"Ah, no, that cannot have happened!" Hongjoong waved him off as Seonghwa gasped.
"How could you even suggest such a thing?" Seonghwa shook his head, clearly disappointed in Yeosang.
"No, I didn't even say anything yet..." Yeosang looked at Seohyun to apologize but she smirked at him, making his eyes go wide.
"I am RIGHT! Something happened between these two, she smirked at me!"
Seohyun immediately put her poker face and looked at Mingi and Jongho, who were right in front of her, with the most innocent look in her eyes. "Did you see me smirk?"
Mingi and Jongho shook their heads. Yeosang shot Seohyun a glare. "I know I'm right. If this turns out to be true..."
"Stop being so dramatic," San said, shushing Yeosang, and got up to drink water.
They were all in the warehouse, having just left school, and were currently relaxing and drinking juice, chatting with each other. Yeosang had noticed Seohyun smiling more than usual, which made him think something happened. It didn't help that San and Seohyun couldn't stop exchanging glances.
Seohyun had brought the drum set with Yunho before coming to the warehouse. Seohyun motioned to Mingi and they got up, leaving the rest behind.
"Have you ever played drums before? Like, actual drums?"
"Yeah," Mingi answered, "A friend of mine had them."
"Alright, you should learn how to arrange them."
So Seohyun taught Mingi all about the components of a drum set, their various uses and how to dismantle them and put them back. Mingi listened carefully, and Seohyun smiled inwardly at how happy he looked. It made her feel guilty that she delayed it so much.
When they were done, they stood back to have a look.
"A much needed upgrade," Mingi smiled, ruffling Seohyun's hair, "Thanks."
"This drum set is my baby, okay? Use it well."
"Yes ma'am," Mingi saluted and Seohyun pointed at the drums. "Have a go."
Mingi sat on the stool, testing the weight of the drum sticks in his hand. He tested the sounds then, and played a little, freestyling, laughing as he did. The others had come to watch him, cheering and hyping him up.
"Not bad," Seohyun said when he finished, "Just go with your heart. Don't think."
"Your turn," Mingi handed her the drum sticks and she almost panicked.
"I think I'm good," she hesitated but someone pushed her forward. It was Yunho.
"I didn't go through all that trouble of coming to your house and carrying the drums to not see you play," he shook his head.
"Alright. Just a second," Seohyun said, tying her hair in a ponytail. "There you go."
Everyone hooted, clearly excited. This was the first time she was going to actually play in front of them, save for the time she had played the violin for San. San smiled at her as if he was thinking the same thing. Seohyun inhaled, testing the drums, and began.
She realized she really did enjoy playing the drums; there was just something about drums where you could express freely, and loudly, as if you wanted everyone to hear it. And it made her smile like crazy, put her brain on pause for a while and play with her heart.
She played like crazy, and when she was done, everyone was in awe.
"You're actually very good!" Hongjoong said, finally clapping. Seohyun bowed her head and got up. "I didn't expect this."
"It's like she was a different person," Jongho was looking at her with wonder.
"Teacher! you're my teacher from today," Mingi declared, and Seohyun scoffed at him.
"You don't need a teacher, teach yourself. I know you can."
"Nooo~" he wailed, "I would love you as a teacher!"
Seohyun just waved him off, going to San and smiling embarrassingly at him. He pinched her cheeks and she pouted, the two of them forgetting for a moment that everyone was still watching her.
"You two... there is something different!" Jongho laughed in disbelief. San and Seohyun started laughing. Yeosang just shook hands with Jongho, thanking him for finally noticing.
"They're not even bothering to deny it, guys," Yunho grinned.
"San is mine!" Wooyoung shouted dramatically, coming to hug San, sticking his tongue out at Seohyun. Seohyun glared at him, baring her teeth at him, and snatched San from him. Wooyoung gasped, and suddenly the two of them were in a battle, both pulling at San by his arms, who was laughing painfully, shouting for help.
"He's not even choosing!" Seohyun laughed, and winked at Wooyoung as she said, "Let's ditch him."
Wooyoung pushed San away, rather forcefully, who fell in Yeosang's arms. He put his arm in Seohyun and she flipped her hair as they walked away from him.
"No one loves me," San buried his nose in Yeosang's neck, pouting. Yeosang sighed, patting his head.
"You're right," Yeosang said, "Absolutely right."
"Hey..." San moaned like a little kid.
prev - next
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trashlie · 3 years
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I'm loving all your ILY posts! I've also seen your comments on reddit and I enjoy reading your insightful analysis there, too. I would like to know your thoughts on Kousuke and Alyssa. Do you think they will become narrative foils? I noticed they were acting awkwardly around each other too (it kind of reminds me of how annoyed Soushi reacts around Maya) and she seems to have a crush on him 👀 I think she'll be used to contrast how he's still capable of redemption. 1/?
I mean Yui groomed them both successfully. They have shown to emulate her behavior, value their reputation over other people's feelings, and refuse to take accountability for their actions against Shin Ae and Nol. But unlike Kousuke, Alyssa has shown no hint of remorse or even guilt. 2/?
Waaahh thank you so much, anon! Isn't it silly that I still go :O when I realize people actually enjoy what I have to say? I started yelling into the void on tumblr because I got worried I was too active on reddit and I was possibly annoying people lmaooooo so I'm actually really glad you're able to find me on both platforms! It means a lot that I'm not just yelling into a total void.
If you don't mind, I'm breaking your ask down into two parts, because I might leave somethin off/this will get too long if I keep it all in one lol. BUT you bring up things I love to think about!!!!! So!!!!!
I think we are deliberately kept in the dark about Alyssa - whether it's to subvert the scheming girl trope, I'm not sure, but there's a lot of things we don't know about her and that's definitely on purpose. She's a character who probably won't be revealed more to us for a while yet, too, which is frustrating if only because I want to know everything NOW, but it does serve to make her more interesting.
Alyssa's interest in Kousuke is so obvious I can't believe I never noticed it in my original reads. I've seen this brushed off as "She just admires him" and I'm just like... she actually sulked for a moment about Kousuke leaving! Meanwhile she was straight up all but telling Nol she'll help him pack his bags lmao.
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I feel like the cast of her shadow is deliberate, too, but look at that face. Sulking.
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There's room to argue that we can't see Alyssa's face when she first tells him she won't stop him, but she kind of makes it abundantly clear that Nol being away doesn't really affect her. And, I mean, look at how their relationship is conducted. She's bragged to Meg that she and Nol are so casual and cool and easy breezy.
(I guess that means there ALSO is room to argue that Alyssa is putting on a front and just saying this to make sure people think her relationship is great, but the only People who know is Meg. And as a people pleaser, if Alyssa felt uncomfortable with the casual nature of her relationship with Nol, wouldn't she actually do more to make the relationship more of what she wants? Notably during the conversation on the balcony, she basically tells Nol this isn't really her dream relationship, which leads to the admission that they are together not for each other but for the benefits they each get so......)
Kousuke is the one who confuses me the most, because it strikes me as really weird that Yui has used Alyssa as leverage before against Kousuke. "You should bring a date, Kousuke, Alyssa will be there." What does this mean? What does it have to do with him and why would it entice him to bring anyone, anyway? I'm still really baffled on this one, tbh. Something that really stood out to me was during the dinner when Nol finally revealed he was planning to attend Oxford, Kousuke was distracted by his own news that the CFO position would be opening. In fact, when Nol mentions attending Oxford later, Kousuke seems to act like this is his first time hearing it.
Nol takes note of Kousuke's state of distraction before he finally starts talking about his plan.
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The way quim does the dialogue and suddenly Kousuke's interest returning is.... interesting isn't it? From the moment Nol notes Kousuke's disinterest, we don't see his face again until Rand brings up Alyssa. Quim doesn't do anything without reason - in a movie, you wouldn't waste film on Kousuke's interesting returning at the mention of Alysa unless it meant anything, right?
There's so many little moments that make me go what the heck is going on here, too.
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What the heck is up with THIS? Why does Kousuke deliberate SO LONG before he calls Alyssa? Like, do I think he's really so weirded out about calling his younger brother's girlfriend, considering he has one of his younger brother's own friends reporting on him and at his beck and call? You can't convince me that he's hesitant only because Alyssa is the sister of Meg. It just seems too wary.
And yes, this moment here?
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It really does have the same tone as Soushi's wariness of Maya, except is Kousuke wary of Alyssa in the same way? Is he wary of her intentions? This one is so hard for me to read, because frankly, at this point it's hard to tell if Kousuke even cares about Nol as a brother or because he was forced to and he feels deep-buried remorse for the way he treated him and doesn't know how to handle it. Is he just aware of Alyssa's keen interest in him and that puts him on edge? Would he even care about Alyssa's keen interest unless she starts to get pushy?
I HONESTLY HAVE NO IDEA and frankly, it drives me nuts, so I love to discuss this and see what other people have to say. I'd never even noticed how long he deliberates before finally calling her until someone on reddit pointed that out.
lmao this so much preamble to get to the point but anyway YES they are absolutely parallels and I do wonder if they would become foils. Again, it's hard to know with Alyssa because we've been deliberately shielded so much of her personality right now and it's hard to tell what's real and what's not with her. The way that she worries about Shinae telling Nol what she did absolutely reads to me as a lack of remorse, but maybe I'm just projecting because we haven't been given much reason to like her lol. Shinae definitely makes it seem like Alyssa never actually apologized and the way Shinae just brushes it off makes me feel like there was never actual, proper closure. What Alyssa did is worse than just causing her injury: it was why she did it and how she reacted like Shinae was something dirty and how dare she even talk to her even though Shinae probably just wanted to know why Alyssa stopped being friends with her. Maybe she was even seeking closure at the time.
In the same way that Nol and Shinae are mirrors, Kousuke and Alyssa are their parallel abusers, grooming victims of Yui, those who care more about their image and reputation than anything else and have hurt others (Nol and Shinae) in their quest to fill the role. We still don't know if Alyssa dated Nol because she genuinely had a crush (doubtful so far) or because she figured out the family he's from and wanted to get closer. I try so hard to give her the benefit of the doubt but narratively we aren't privy to that yet. Also, have you noticed that Nol and Shinae both have a relationship of some kind with each others' abuser? This mirror and their parallel abusers thing is INTRICATELY woven.
That's what makes it so difficult to tell if she'll become a foil or merely a parallel that highlights what Nol and Shinae have been through. We know Kousuke will receive a redemption arc, because he's a main character, and also because I think part of subverting his trope is that he has to take responsibility for his past actions, rather than being loved in spite of the things he's done or whatever. In order for Kousuke to proper and develop further, he has to be held accountable and he has to break free of his family. Can we trust the same for Alyssa? At this point, she doesn't want to lose Nol because she knows if she loses him, she can just as easily lose her career and access to the world she's only just gained access to (and if she were to lose it all right now, it would be worse for her because she'd have all those trainee fees to pay back).
I think both Kousuke and Alyssa are likely in for a very public airing of their sins; for Kousuke it may come in the form of the expose YuJing is working on, collateral damage in the quest to take down Yui. I also think the only way to nudge Kousuke to change is that his image has to take a hit in some form. Is it that Rand isn't his father? Is it a reveal that he abused his brother? Is it whatever happened in the past that Nol got in trouble for was caused by Kousuke and he let Nol take the blame? Likewise, I think the fact that people knew Alyssa in middle school means she's not so safe, either; what if one of the girls from after school duty reveals what happened? Surely there were rumors going around school about what happened - Shinae is out of school, Alyssa is pulled from school, kids talk. Frankly, a scandal like that could ruin her career, and worse, if Nol knew what she had done, would he be able to remain shackled to her?
While I know Kousuke won't immediately take responsibility for his actions, I've always believed that such a catalyst would at least make him start thinking about it and force him to admit it. It wouldn't happen over night, but in time it will. But will Alyssa? Would she deny the allegations? Would she just shift blame, insist that it was all an accident, that it wasn't bullying like you think? (Cos look, I do believe it was an accident, but there's a way to call it an accident and still admit fault and blame; but just as easily you can call it an accident and try to shirk responsibility.)
I do love the idea of her being a foil for Kousuke, an Aesop's fable, if you will, of what happens when you barter with the devil (Yui). I'm not opposed to the scheming female character type, but I do oppose it when they take down others to raise themselves up, and if that's the way Alyssa will end up doing it, then I'll be happy to watch her fall. If she can scheme and use her connections without hurting people then hey power to ya. Unlike Alyssa, Kousuke never had a chance to evade Yui, and being able to walk away from her as an adult will be a choice he can make. Alyssa loses... so much if she breaks her deal.
I guess that's the thing about where she and Nol are in their relationship now - it's been made clear he's hanging in here because he's forced to and as a sort of act of self-sabotage, full well knowing she's here because she's taking advantage of the opportunities that "dating" him brings so... if they're in an agreement, is it okay to watch her climb right now? She leaves me conflicted and I know it's largely because she's one of the characters we know just enough to hate but so little to justify. Could it be that it all just got out of hand for her? At first she just wanted friends, was trying to find a place to belong, something good in a life that deprived her of social connections. And then comes along Yui, seducing her with ideas of fame and fortune? Was the desire to be loved and admired so strong it powered over the need to fit in with friends and she readily cast them off? Did she not anticipate what it would actually mean, thought she could have her cake and eat it, too? The way she responds to Nol's texts, and the fact that Dieter and Soushi ask him about her, means she probably isn't even in touch with them at all anymore. Idk, I really look forward to seeing their dynamic pre-idol Alyssa, because I want to know how she fit with them, what was it like?
And then, because this was supposed to be about foils lmao you have the fact that Shinae basically foils both Alyssa and Kousuke in regard to Nol, both as a person who cares about him and also as "a good friend" vs "the person I'm currently seeing" lmao like, everyone is literally set to juxtapose each other and man, I'll never get over how well this has been done lmao. Compared to Kousuke and Alyssa, Shinae is the one who accepts responsibility even when it's difficult, who knows when and how to swallow her pride (even if she's not the one who should) and I think it's why she is the one seen a the champion at Nol's side - they are the ones who care little for their images and who know how to apologize (even when they aren't the ones who should be) and that's why they are at each other's sides.
So yes, this is a very long essay response lol to essentially say: I'm still undecided if I think Alyssa will become a foil or merely remain a parallel. I would love to see her redeem herself but something tells me not all characters in this story will be redeeamable. Maybe one day we'll understand her motivation, even if we don't agree with it. I hope at the very least she makes peace with Shinae, but I get the feeling she'll be forced into it (as in, her secret gets ousted) and that's not as satisfying, but hey, if it helps Shinae then I'm for it.
A friend of mine has mused that maybe Alyssa will be the one to oust the secret herself and I'm ngl, I like that idea though it does feel kind of vindictive towards her character. Maybe accidentally spilling it to Nol would be the segue to a couple episodes from her POV though!
Gosh this was so long I'm so sorry lmao but please follow up with your thoughts and feelings, too, or if this made you think of anything or what! I think at this point in the story we've been given a lot of information but we just don't have enough of it to totally piece together what we're supposed to be seeing. I think Kousuke and Alyssa's weirdness around each other is very deliberate, though, and I'm not sure "She's Meg's sister" is enough to warrant so many panels of Kou being SO WEIRD about her, you know? Am I missing thing? Is there more to be revealed? Are we just blind? lmao Aaaahhhhhhhhhhh
#I Love Yoo#ILY Brainrot#Alyssa Cho#Kousuke Hirahara#at this point always anticipate a read more cos whew i can't shut up!#BUT I'VE BEEN FIXATED ON THIS FOR A WHILE NOW AND I STILL HAVEN'T COME TO A CONCLUSION I LIKE#AND I'VE BEEN DYING TO TALK A LITTLE ABOUT ALYSSA AND KOUSUKE AS UNREPENTENT PARALLELS AND YUI PUPPETS#the way that Nol and Shinae are mirrors and they each have their own version of Kousuke/Alyssa#and conveniently they each have a relationship of some sort with each others abusers does not escape me#what will Shinae think when she finds out how Kousuke has treated Nol?#What will Nol think when he finds out who Alyssa was during her brief stint at public school#I'm dying for flashbacks with Alyssa because I JUST! WANT! TO UNDERSTAND!!!!!!!#so far it's so easy to villify her because we don't know otherwise#we've been given no reason to justify or forgive her#and you know what i am okay with villifying a character like her in a story with some pretty dimensional female characters#Maya is one such character who was easy for readers to hate but redeemed herself by being mature and honest with Shinae#do I trust Alyssa to be mature and honest?#only if she ever becomes okay with the idea of losing her image#i think that's a big thing for Kousuke and Alyssa?#at some point Kousuke will realize his image is a fraud#something he was manipulated into despite what he likes to believe#and once he comes to that realization after he breaks down and crumbles and rebuilds he will find a new path and build his own image#one of his own making#but Alyssa....? Who or what would she be if she lost her image?#if she couldn't control the narrative?#AAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
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brycelahelalover · 4 years
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GOLDEN AGE
Pairing: Bryce × f!MC( Tesse Sterling )
Author's note: Sooo! Hi... My name is Chahnaz and this my first fanfic... actually it's my first post ever so i don't know how it's going to come out . So for anyone out there who will actually read this thing .. THANK YOU!! I hope you like it .
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It's been 30 years. 30 years since Bryce and Tesse gave their vows to love and cherish each other for the rest of their lives .30 years since Tesse called Bryce her husband for the first time. 30 years since Bryce called Tesse his wife for the first time (and by the way he really loved it.. in fact he loved it so much that he called her only that for the first few months. It's like he forgot her name or something). 30 years in which they had two beautiful children. Alexander (Alex) and Alexis. And no they're not twins. Bryce thought that he was funny by giving the girl that name after Tesse got to name the first born and as much as she wanted to argue with him about giving the child that name for the wrong reasons, she didn't since she actually liked it and because she promised him she would let him name their second baby if they ever had one.
30 years in which they encountered both happiness and loss. Like happiness of celebrating weddings. of Danny to Sienna. Of Elijah to Phoebe. And of Jackie to Mike. Yes.. Jackie got married. Make no fault it wasn't easy for the poor lad to convince her.. in fact it took him months of proposing for her to say yes . Happiness of seeing Keiki go through college, getting her dream job and meeting the love of her life. But they also went through big losses. Like the loss of a patient or a loved one. It wasn't easy but they made it through. Together.
In these 30 years, Bryce and Tesse made it through major big stones in their careers. In fact Bryce now is the head of neurosurgery. And Tesse filled Ethan's place as the head of the diagnostics team after his retirement much to June's frustration. They were known as the power couple at the hospital. Granted, it took both of them a lot of hard work to get where they are but it was worth it.
IT WAS UNBELIEVABLE. ALL OF IT.
Tesse was sitting at the desk in the diagnostics office going through all the details that were presented to her for their lastest patient when her thoughts wondered to her spouse. She knows that she should focus. Christopher, the patient, still hasn't made it from Seattle. He was a wealthy 78 years old who seeked them as his last resort after his last 11 doctors came up empty handed for a reason to his symptoms. Yes, they started treating rich patients too since the whole ordeal 30 years ago because both rich and poor people have the right to the best treatment, adding to the fact that the hospital gains a good penny from the wealthy ones. But still as much as she tries to focus on the words in front of her, she can't. And she doesn't blame that on her aging brain, that as unfocused as it gets it's still as sharp as it was back in her twenties. But she blames it on her husband's behavior. Bryce has been acting quite weirdly as of late. She speculates that it's because of their marriage's 30th anniversary. But he has prepared surprises for her like that before but never acted like this. He spent a lot of time out which is surprising considering he never goes out without her.. or he prefers not to. Adding to the fact that he has been avoiding her and being really quit most of the time, which obviously isn't like Bryce since he's a talking machine that doesn't stop unless he's sleeping. So what could possibly caused this change in behavior. Well only one way to find out, she's going to talk to him later at home. She'll prepare a nice meal to celebrate their b-day while he's in the hospital since apparently he has a surgery that's bound to end a little bit late. And over dinner She'll attack, well not quite laterally cause she's not crazy but she will rain down on him with questions. Now that she forged a plan she feels a little less unfocused and goes back to work.
After a long day of work, Tesse is on her way out of the hospital when she decides to check out the surgery board to see exactly when Bryce's surgery end... or so she tells herself. And lo and behold, there's no surgery preformed at this hour by him. Well that ads to the list of suspicions. Why did he lie to her??. Tesse goes to check his office to see if he's still in. He's not. After that she goes to see if Danny by any chance saw him. He informs her that Bryce has left a couple of hours ago. So he's probably at home. On her way to her car, she gets her phone out to call him but he didn't answer " of course " said Tesse and not because he's used to not answering his phone in fact he's used to nag at her every time she didn't answer his calls . But because the man went to great lengths to hid whatever he's doing. Now remember how I said she wasn't going to attack him because she's not crazy... FORGOT THAT. She totally will.
After the whole drive thinking what he could possibly be doing she makes it home. And at her first step inside the door, she calls his name "BRYCE" you could totally hear the anger in her voice but she was met with silence, that is intel she hears one of the doors opening. Turning around she sees her son who was visiting after his law school finals to spend some time with his parents." Mom?" said Alex " .. you okay?" she could see the confusion writing on his face because of her near scream.
"Yeah, sweetheart. I'm fine." replied Tesse.
"Then why are screaming dad's name?"
"Well, I don't know where he is. He's not answering his phone and he lied to me about having a late surgery. And Now he's not even home. So.."
"Do you want me to try calling him?"
"Sure. Though, I doubt he's going to answer."
And sure enough, Bryce still didn't answer his phone.
"Okay... So, isn't today supposed to be your marriage anniversary?"
"Yeah" Tesse answered dejectedely. She really didn't expect to spend it this way.
"So why don't we go to a restaurant? Have a nice dinner? Just you and me? "
"I don't know..."
"Please, mom? I miss spending time with you."
Not wanting to lower her son's spirits, she agreed and went to change her clothes. She wore a beautiful little black dress that fit her form perfectly. Sure, she was sad and angry at Bryce for ditching her but she didn't have to look that way. Not when her son went out of his way to lift her spirits. She really did raise a gentleman.
By the time she was done, she found Alex waiting for her at the living room dressed in a dress shirt and pants. He took her hand than kissed her knuckles" Happy anniversary, Mom" than placed her palm at the crook of his own. And they made their way down to his car.
The direction Alex was driving in, was familiar to Tesse but not to any restaurant she knew. Only when he parked in the drive way to the huge mansion had she realized where he took her. It was her parents mansion. She haven't been in this place since her mother's funeral over 5 years ago. She has been thinking lately of renovating it but it was a project that would take a huge amount of time. Time she didn't have. But still that doesn't answer the question as to why would her son bring her here. The place is supposed to be deserted.
"Alex? Why are we here?" She asked.
But Alex didn't answer her question, instead he lead her to the front door, taking out a key when they made it there and opened the door. Where he got that key she will never know, but she didn't have time to wonder about that a lot cause as they made their way inside, the light suddenly turned on and in front of her she saw all of her friends, Alexis, her brother Connor and in the middle, sporting a huge grin in his face, stood the one and only Bryce Lahela.
" Happy anniversary, Tesse " said everyone.
Through her overwhelm and joy, she could see the place has been cleaned and tidied. It was like no time has passed. She looked into Bryce's eyes knowing that was probably all his doing. He smiled, making his way toward her. Taking her hands, he said:
" Happy anniversary, Love. I hope you're not too mad at me "
And in that moment she knew why she could never be mad at Bryce Lahela.
The end
Hi again! It's me.. And you probably knew that. Again, I want to say thank you to the people who took time out of their day to read this. I know there wasn't much to it but I didn't want to make it longer than it was. Plus, it took me more than 3 hours. So there... I hope you enjoyed it and thank you. Again.
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azulafangligo · 4 years
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I know it's a bit late, but I wanted to share another story for @azulaweek . It's for day 4. I was happy to be part of Azula week for the first time and I'm looking forward to participating next year. Stay flamin :))
A mother's love
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This story takes place about a week before the flashbacks in Zuko Alone
Everyone in the Royal Palace was sleeping at this late hour, except Ursa. She couldn't sleep a wink. She tried really hard to fall asleep, but to no avail.
It was a warm night in the Fire Nation. The moon shone high on a cloudless, black sky.
The princess left her bedroom with a candle in her hand, walking through the empty, dark corridors of the palace toward the kitchen to drink a cup of water. She could have ordered a servant to bring to bring her some water, but she didn't want to wake anyone up and start a commotion. Besides, she didn't like ordering others around. Ursa respected the people who served her and her family, but she didn't like relying on them for every little thing and exploit them, even though most would argue it was their job. It just didn't seem right and she wasn't comfortable with it.
As Ursa got closer to the kitchen, she entered the corridor with Azula's and Zuko's rooms. She passed by Zuko's room quietly, but when she was a few meters away from Azula's, she heard a creaking sound as the door was slowly opened. She stopped as she saw her daughter walking out of her room while rubbing her eyes and closing the door behind her. Azula spun around to see her mother after she noticed the candle light. She looked startled, but also tired, having small dark circles under her eyes which had been half open until she saw her mother. She was now facing Ursa wide-eyed.
"I was just going back to my room," Azula said after a few seconds, putting her hand back on the door handle.
Ursa looked at her, worried.
"Are you alright, Azula?" she asked.
"Yes. I just wanted to drink some water," she said, annoyed. Even though she was obviously tired, she seemed in a rush to get away from her mother. This saddened Ursa. She really loved her and cared about her, but she knew she wasn't always doing the best job of showing her that. She tried hard to be a good mother for both Azula and Zuko, but her husband made that very difficult.
She stepped closer to Azula and put a hand on her shoulder.
"Come on, tell me what's wrong," she said gently. "Did you have a nightmare?"
"No, I already told you, mom. I was thirsty. Now I'll go back to sleep," Azula said coldly. She looked away from Ursa and folded her arms. "Since when do you care about me anyway? Don't you have to worry about Zuko? Or you're here just because he doesn't need you right now and you want to make sure I don't get into trouble?" Azula said acidly.
"Azula, I love you and I care about you. I know I don't show it to you enough, but I'm doing my best for you and your brother. I want to help you if something's bothering you. You don't have to keep it to yourself. You can tell me. " Ursa smiled encouragingly at her, urging her to say what was on her mind.
Her mother didn't usually speak like this to her. She was always so busy giving Zuko all the attention that she neglected her.
Azula stood there for a second. She couldn't sleep all night. It was really frustrating and she wasn't sure what to do. She thought maybe a breath of fresh air and a few minutes in the gardens would help, but her mom came out of nowhere and she had to go back to her room now. Azula didn't have anything to say to her and just wanted to go to bed and be left alone. She'd be fine just by herself and she'd fall asleep eventually. It's horrible. I just want to sleep, but I can't. I hate this and I don't need her. I never did and I never will. She was about to go back to her room, but she thought how she'll stay in her bed for hours, struggling to catch some sleep, all alone. As much as Azula wanted to avoid her mother, she admitted trying again to sleep would be really hard and unpleasant. Maybe even more unpleasant than spending time with the woman that, no matter what Azula did, wouldn't appreciate her and would only criticize her and complain how she was mean to her favourite child. Azula didn't know why her mother pretended to care now and there was nothing she could do to help anyway, but it was better to tell her the truth instead of being all alone. This is probably a bad decision and I might end up regretting it, but here we go.
"I can't fall asleep. I've been trying for hours, but I can't," Azula told Ursa.
"It happens sometimes. I can't sleep either. Would you like us to go to the garden for a while?" Ursa said.
Azula looked away again. She still wasn't sure she wanted to be in her presence. It wasn't nice to be mom's least favourite child, but she had no trouble with that. Azula didn't need anyone. She did great just by herself. But maybe it wouldn't hurt to go for a walk outside, since she wanted to do that anyway. However, even though at first she would have preferred to be alone, perhaps it'd be good to have some company.
"Alright," she said.
Ursa smiled at her again.
"Come on," the princess said, a hint of joyfulness in her voice.
As they entered the garden, Azula felt the gentle wind on her skin. It was warm and pleasant outside. The bright stars were sparkling on the dark sky. She looked at the scenery overhead for a few moments.
"It's a beautiful night, isn't it?" Ursa asked.
"I guess," Azula replied in a neutral voice.
They walked a few meters to the pond and set down. Minutes passed without either of them saying anything. Azula looked at her reflection in the water. In the darkness, she barely saw the dark circles under her eyes, but they were there. She frowned. I ought to get some sleep, but the problem is I don't feel tired at all. She looked tired though, because she struggled to sleep and she could see it in her face.
After sometime, Ursa finally began speaking.
"I'm sorry I haven't been a good mother. I haven't given you enough attention and I haven't told you how much I love you enough times. It's just… It's hard to raise two kids at the same time-"
"Yes, because I'm so mean and horrible and Zuko is so great," Azula cut her off.
"Azula, I never said that."
"But you mean it," her daughter replied, looking her in the eye.
"I don't. I know I left you the impression I prefer him over you, but that's not true. You're both amazing children and I love you equally. I admit I spent more time with him, but that's because your father isn't giving him any attention."
"Don't blame father," Azula said infuriated. "If Zuko would be good enough to deserve his love he'd get it. He doesn't deserve your love either."
Ursa was surprised and outraged that Azula spoke like that about her brother. She opened her mouth to tell her how awful it was to treat Zuko that way, but stopped, feeling her anger dissipate. It was mean to say something like that, but Azula only thought these things because she didn't feel loved enough. That was why she wanted to be better than Zuko at everything-so she'd be appreciated by her parents. Ozai had a very bad influence on her. He turned her against Zuko and made her see him and everyone who wasn't perfect as a failure. Azula was a wonderful child and the only thing her father did was give her bad examples, cultivate negative thoughts and feelings inside her and turn her into a competitive and hateful person. He had too many expectations and put too much pressure on her and, to be honest, he didn't even love her. It hurt Ursa to admit this, but it was true. Ozai loved neither of his kids nor anyone else in his family. He didn't even love Ursa. They had an arranged marriage just so he and Azulon could be in control of Avatar Roku's bloodline. But this wasn't about her. It was about Azula. She needed to know her mother cared about her and was proud of her.
"Azula, I'm sorry your father has so many expectations and induces you to feel so much anger and hate. I know it's very frustrating, but I'm here for you."
"What are you talking about? Dad's great and he teaches me to be the best. How is that bad?" Azula said, but a hint of doubt made its way into her mind. She hated to admit it, but sometimes she got tired and it became hard to catch her breath struggling to be the perfect child. I am perfect, I shouldn't listen to her. Dad wants what's best for me. He wouldn't have so many expectations if he didn't think I am up to the challenge. It's his way of showing how capable he thinks I am to do anything I have to. Azula wanted to believe these things, she really did, but she couldn't dismiss the thought that her mother was right. No matter how hard she tried to convince herself mom just wanted her to be nice to Zuko, she couldn't. Something in her voice, in her eyes told Azula she actually… cared. She was angry to think this stuff about dad, but, deep down, she knew it to be true. This made her really angry and also sad.
"I shouldn't have let him influence you like this. I know you're suffering and it's exhausting to try to be flawless everyday. I let you down, Azula, but I'll make it up to you," Ursa said, putting her hand on Azula's.
Azula didn't want to say anything bad about her father. She loved him and he loved her, but, for the first time in her life, she felt the need to say what was on her mind. She just couldn't hold back her thoughts, regardless of how much she tried. She felt weak and miserable and she despised it. I… I've never seen mom like this. It's the first time she actually wants to talk to me and know how I feel. She actually seems to be honest…
Azula slid her hand from under Ursa's. Then, she put her head in her hands, staring blankly at the pond.
"Sometimes it's… really hard. I do my best to please dad, but it's never enough," Azula said.
Ursa than unexpectedly hugged her tightly. Azula stared in surprise for a couple of seconds before she embraced her mother as well.
"I think you're great the way you are. You don't need to prove anything to me. I love you so much and I'll prove that to you more often," Ursa promised.
"Thanks, mom," Azula whispered.
They let go and just sat there in silence. Azula didn't know how much time they spent at the pond. It might have been minutes or hours, she had no idea. However, as time passed by, Azula gradually lost awareness of her surroundings. She was unable to concentrate on anything as the sight before her eyes became blurry. Soon, it was very hard to keep her eyes open. Her eyelashes slowly closed, everything turning black as she finally drifted off to sleep. Azula propped her body against her mother's arm.
Ursa gently put her hands around her daughter's waist and placed her on her lap.
In the few remaining seconds of consciousness before Azula fell asleep, she felt her mother gently caress her on the top of her head. This brought a smile on her face as she felt really calm and relaxed, but also happy.
Mom loves me after all… she thought.
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kittykatknits · 7 years
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So I read a "post" saying Sansa running WF successfully is ooc. I disagree. Sansa's the defacto lady of the Vale and she's doing a good job. Besides innately being smart she's also getting training for being a lady,administrator, diplomat and in politics. She has natural acumen for organization,logistics,hardwork,knows how to run a household well She's learning to gauge others' motivation&how to maneuver them successfully. Also she'll have advisors to help her. I see her as a very successful 1/2
ruler/Lady of WF or when ruling the North/looking after its daily workings/governing/managing it; I dont think it’s ooc for Sansa to be a capable ruler/administrator/and dispatch the duties that come w/ being Lady of WF/looking after the North at all. That’s where her book arc&training montage is leading her. What do you think? 2/2
In short, I largely agree with you. 
I’m loathe to think of fandom as a single identity but there has been a general trend with Sansa as a character over the years (at least based upon my unique experiences). Long ago, when only two books were available in the series, Sansa Stark was largely defined by two things: (1) the events on the Trident and subsequent deaths of Lady/Mycah and (2) the betrayal/execution of her father. Then, the third book was released in 2000 and fandom decided Sansa should also be defined by her feelings, or lack thereof, towards Tyrion Lannister. Oy, I am forever sick of those debates. Opinions changed, somewhat, after aFfC was released in 2005. Twelve years later and we are still waiting to see how fandom reacts to her in the next book. 
It’s funny in a way. Seventeen years and, for the most part, the discussion around Sansa is almost exactly the same, “Starkness”, killed her wolf, cruel to her sister, cruel to Jon, snob, got her father killed, not truly north like, and so on. Well, no, it’s not funny, it’s frustrating because it seems like there is a growing trend of throwing power hungry into the mix although I think that’s fed largely by the show than by the book’s version of the character 
For the most part, Sansa has never been a popular character, ever. The trend I’ve seen is not so much that she’s received less negativity over time, because she hasn’t, but that her actual fan base has grown. There was an explosion of Sansa fans after the first season of Game of Thrones aired and then again after the second. 
So, anyways, to get to the point, the fact that you saw a post like that, isn’t particularly new or surprising. It’s shallow and inaccurate, but not a surprise. To be honest, I actually blame Martin for some of it. For the most part, he’s done a great job at world building and is fairly consistent when it comes to enforcing the rules. Cat mentions her Ladies once and…that’s it. Cersei is the queen and has no women at court. Martin doesn’t really show us the lives of women in ordinary circumstances, he’s pretty bad at it. We get Marg and her cousins in the third book some and Cersei finally gains a friend (who is also a spy…) in the fourth. There is a lot of work telling us how men are educated, think of the memories of both Jaime and Jon. We even see it with Bran as he functions as the Stark in WF. Heck, the first chapter is showing Ned raising his sons. But, the women, it doesn’t happen to nearly the same degree. Readers need to work at it so much more than they do with the male characters. 
To me, I compare Sansa’s interactions with Measter Colemon in the Vale to those of Bran with Luwin. Colemon speaks with and takes guidance from Sansa in the same way Maester Luwin did with Ned/Cat, but much less so with Bran. 
And let’s look at this:
Maddy and Gretchel were waiting outside with Maester Colemon. The maester had washed the night soil from his hair and changed his robe. Robert’s squires had turned up as well. Terrance and Gyles could always sniff out trouble.“Lord Robert is feeling stronger,” Alayne told the serving women. “Fetch hot water for his bath, but see you don’t scald him. And do not pull on his hair when you brush out the tangles, he hates that.” One of the squires sniggered, until she said, “Terrance, lay out his lordship’s riding clothes and his warmest cloak. Gyles, you may clean up that broken chamber pot.”
- Alayne II, aFfC
The household is taking orders from Sansa here too. And when her authority is questioned:
Gyles Grafton made a face. “I’m no scrubwoman.“Do as Lady Alayne commands, or Lothor Brune will hear of it,” said Maester Colemon. He followed her along the hallway and down the twisting stairs. “I am grateful for your intercession, my lady. You have a way with him.” He hesitated. “Did you observe any shaking while you were with him?”
- Alayne II, aFfC
This chapter shows Sansa shutting down the Eyrie and preparing for the entire household to take up residence in the gates of the moon. It’s exactly what would be expected of the Lady of the Vale. 
And if there is any further doubt, the first Alayne chapter is one long bit of political theater:
“She did indeed. She saw to the mulling of the wine first, found a suitable wheel of sharp white cheese, and commanded the cook to bake bread enough for twenty, in case the Lords Declarant brought more men than expected. Once they eat our bread and salt they are our guests and cannot harm us. The Freys had broken all the laws of hospitality when they’d murdered her lady mother and her brother at the Twins, but she could not believe that a lord as noble as Yohn Royce would ever stoop to do the same.The solar next. Its floor was covered by a Myrish carpet, so there was no need to lay down rushes. Alayne asked two serving men to erect the trestle table and bring up eight of the heavy oak-and-leather chairs. For a feast she would have placed one at the head of the table, one at the foot, and three along each side, but this was no feast. She had the men arrange six chairs on one side of the table, two on the other. By now the Lords Declarant might have climbed as far as Snow. It took most of a day to make the climb, even on muleback. Afoot, most men took several days.It might be that the lords would talk late into the night. They would need fresh candles. After Maddy laid the fire, she sent her down to find the scented beeswax candles Lord Waxley had given Lady Lysa when he sought to win her hand. Then she visited the kitchens once again, to make certain of the wine and bread. All seemed well in hand, and there was still time enough for her to bathe and wash her hair and change.”
- Alayne I, aFfC
This isn’t GRRM being overly verbose here or falling in love with his food descriptions. It’s Sansa setting up a stage, thinking through everything from guest right to the type of table and chairs and their placement. Remember, these are not random guests, these are six individuals that are contesting LF’s hold on SR and the Vale. Everything matters. 
It’s no different than the Lannisters in the throne room after the Battle of the BW. That’s one long bit of political theatre too, with the rehearsed scene between Joffrey and Loras or Tywin riding in atop his horse. It’s presentation and Sansa is doing a really good job here of setting everything up to their advantage. 
After this, Sansa dresses herself: 
“There was a gown of purple silk that gave her pause, and another of dark blue velvet slashed with silver that would have woken all the color in her eyes, but in the end she remembered that Alayne was after all a bastard, and must not presume to dress above her station. The dress she picked was lambswool, dark brown and simply cut, with leaves and vines embroidered around the bodice, sleeves, and hem in golden thread. It was modest and becoming, though scarce richer than something a serving girl might wear. Petyr had given her all of Lady Lysa’s jewels as well, and she tried on several necklaces, but they all seemed ostentatious. In the end she chose a simple velvet ribbon in autumn gold.”
- Alayne I, aFfC
Again, it’s more of the same. This isn’t Sansa obsessed with clothes (although what’s wrong with that if she is?) It’s the image she wants to present, it’s the same reasons the Tyrells drape themselves in gold and green. 
Sansa’s chapters are swimming with this stuff and it tends to get dismissed. This stuff matters and it matters a lot. This theater and pageantry is present in every wedding and clothing choice. It’s present in the food (remember the poor fare offered at the RW?). It’s reflected in seat placement at both the WF feast and the PW. And Sansa is really good at it, like really damn good.  
Heck, even Tyrion picks up on her skills:
“She is good at this, he thought, as he watched her tell Lord Gyles that his cough was sounding better, compliment Elinor Tyrell on her gown, and question Jalabhar Xho about wedding customs in the Summer Isles. His cousin Ser Lancel had been brought down by Ser Kevan, the first time he’d left his sickbed since the battle. He looks ghastly. Lancel’s hair had turned white and brittle, and he was thin as a stick. Without his father beside him holding him up, he would surely have collapsed. Yet when Sansa praised his valor and said how good it was to see him getting strong again, both Lancel and Ser Kevan beamed. She would have made Joffrey a good queen and a better wife if he’d had the sense to love her.”
- Tyrion VIII, Sos
But, as important as all of this is throughout the entire series, it has always tended to be overlooked and dismissed which is really disappointing. I don’t claim to know her ending, whether Hand, queen, Lady of WF, or something else. But, I guarantee all of the above is going somewhere and it isn’t just to take out LF or rebuild after. I suspect it will be incredibly important come the war for the dawn too. 
This has gone on for a long time though, so I will stop now. But, hopefully, I answered your question…at least some.
Thank you anon for letting me talk about my girl!! I love Sansa so much. :)
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Nancy & Rio
Nancy: I heard from Edie, so you can pass that good news on, like Rio: Yeah? Rio: Did she say where she was or anything? Nancy: Obviously not Nancy: Why talk about herself when she can have more fun being a bitch about everyone else, right? Rio: At least you heard from her, something to tell the 'rents anyway, better than radio silence Rio: that's about how it usually goes, yeah Nancy: Yeah Rio: Cheers for letting us know Rio: how's everything? Nancy: The baby's fine. Ro's Ro Rio: Yeah Rio: She been to sleep yet? Nancy: Of course not Rio: Didn't think so Rio: She'll crash eventually Nancy: She should be medicated Nancy: But you know Rio: Not if she's gonna breastfeed Rio: if she can produce milk Nancy: She blatantly won't Nancy: Jesus, if she doesn't want drugs I'll take them Nancy: Fight my mum for them, like Rio: Shame Daddy hasn't put in an appearance yet, could really come through for you all by the sounds Nancy: I'm not that desperate Nancy: Not yet Rio: He'll be gutted Nancy: I'd like to think he'd be a bit too preoccupied to notice me Rio: Unlikely Rio: newborns are time consuming for the Ma sure, but boring lbr, not gonna pique his interest Nancy: I'm unlikely to either though Nancy: This is hardly a club atmosphere Nancy: Shame, like Rio: He's willing to liven up a baby shower Rio: can't be tamed, truly Nancy: Don't Nancy: I can only repress so much and I'm at my limit here Rio: Weren't that bad, like Nancy: Still Nancy: Thanks to your sister I'm in no mood Rio: Whaddya gonna do Nancy: How or what do I know Rio: Well it's over now Nancy: If only we could say that about the rest of this mess Nancy: Did Buster send you his flight details yet? Rio: Can't cry about it forever Rio: she'll get on with it Rio: Drew'll do whatever he does, life goes on Rio: Yeah, did he you Nancy: None of that is good enough, but yeah sure Nancy: Of course he didn't Nancy: He doesn't need me to pick him up from the airport, like Nancy: Priorities Rio: Maybe not Rio: but that's how it is regardless Rio: True enough Nancy: The defeatist attitude is catching, yeah? Okay Rio: What? Nancy: None of us are gonna care about how much of a mess this is anymore then? It's run its course Rio: She's a grown woman Rio: and it's her life Rio: What do you expect me to do Rio: or you Nancy: I don't expect you to do anything Nancy: Just be happy that my brother is coming back for this Nancy: That's what matters, obviously Rio: Why have you got a problem with me suddenly? Nancy: I don't Nancy: You know that's what important Rio: Well I'm not allowed to see the baby so yeah, to me it is Rio: if you want me to rock up and make Ro worse, like, I still won't so sorry to disappoint Nancy: How do you think that's what I want? Nancy: Oh my god Rio: Well you're pissed off at someone, babe and you're directing it at me Rio: and I haven't done anything else wrong, unless I have so Nancy: How are you not pissed off at everyone? That's my point Rio: Because it's exhausting Rio: and I don't care to change her mind of me, she can think what she likes Nancy: It's exhausting trying to hold everything together too Nancy: It's exhausting every way Rio: I know Rio: that's why I've stopped Rio: call it defeatist but it wasn't working anyway Nancy: I don't want to do this anymore Nancy: Maybe Edie's right Nancy: Or you are with using my brother as your escape hatch Rio: Fuck you Rio: that's not what I'm doing Nancy: No? Rio: No Nancy: Well then maybe you should Nancy: He does with you, to deal with being there Rio: Grow up Rio: She's 15 Rio: What's your excuse? Nancy: What's your problem? Nancy: You love him, you lean on him, that's how it works Rio: You have no idea Nancy: I know how relationships work I'm not a total idiot Rio: if you think it's using each other for a means to an end then no Rio: you really don't Nancy: What so you're mad 'cause I put the word use in there? Nancy: Okay its the wrong word Nancy: I'm sorry Rio: Whatever, forget about it Nancy: No Rio: Then what Rio: say what you wanna say Nancy: I don't want to fall out with you Nancy: I need you, okay? Nancy: So let me fix it Rio: We're not gonna fall out Rio: it's alright Nancy: It's not Nancy: Nothing is Nancy: I'm as much of a mess as everything else Rio: Yeah Rio: I know Rio: but I really don't have any solutions, I'm sorry, like Rio: I really am Nancy: It's not your job Rio: Nope Rio: it's no one's but we can still try Rio: or not Rio: either way is fine Nancy: I don't know what to do Nancy: Nothing I've tried works Nancy: I can't even talk to Edie, I'm out of my depth with everything Nancy: Jesus Rio: Well, no one can talk to Edie Rio: It's always on her terms, she's just good at that, it keeps everyone at a distance she's happy with Rio: but Rio: what else do you need to deal with, right now, like? Nancy: It was like I was back on the playground, like oh she's horrible to me I gotta be horrible back Nancy: Am I a child? No Nancy: And you were there the other night too so Rio: You can't beat yourself up about it Rio: It's what she wanted Rio: and you still tried, so it's something, though it doesn't feel worth it, I'm sure Nancy: Yeah, I guess Rio: It is Rio: My Ma will appreciate it if literally nothing else Nancy: It's fucked 'cause so much of what she said about me is true Rio: Don't mean she had to say it the way she did Rio: if at all Rio: 'cos I've been there, I know how it goes Nancy: What does it say about me though that I'm such a mess she doesn't even know me and she knows it Rio: She pays more attention than you'd reckon she could Rio: being gone and that Nancy: Clearly Nancy: What a headfuck Rio: Yeah Rio: I ain't gonna apologize on her behalf, you know but Rio: sorry it's got you this way now Nancy: It's not just her Nancy: I wish I could handle her all the blame but Nancy: hand* Nancy: I've made plenty of my own mistakes on top Rio: Yeah Rio: I know you're struggling right now Rio: and I know the club only ever seems like the answer once you're drunk enough, if that Rio: but I'm fucked if I have any better ideas, you know Nancy: I don't think I can ever go back there Nancy: It's so embarrassing Nancy: Thank god this town has plenty of others Rio: You know Rio: they see it every night too, babe Nancy: Okay, I'll take that but if I see that girl again I will die Rio: Not to be that bitch but do you even remember her face Rio: the snaps already dead, like Nancy: Ouch Nancy: I can't forget 'cause she's texted me since Nancy: I'm such a mess even strangers have to check in and check up Rio: Oh dear Rio: at least she's being Rio: nice? Rio: Yeah, that is shaming, no way 'round it Nancy: You don't even know Nancy: But don't worry I won't give you details Rio: You can if you wanna vent but yeah, also feel free to take it to your grave Rio: again, been there, most of us have Nancy: I don't think you have though Nancy: That's what I'm saying Nancy: We were having fun, I thought, but then she rejected me 'cause I was too drunk Nancy: I can't do anything right, literally Rio: Ahh Rio: awkward but at least she did the decent thing, like Rio: it's rare people do, sadly Nancy: Buster has slept with how many girls on nights out, like Nancy: I can't even get one Nancy: It's depressing Rio: Probably don't make it a competition, like Rio: if the vibe ain't good, people are gonna pick up on it Nancy: I know you're right Nancy: But god Rio: I know Rio: it's frustrating then it's like, kill me Rio: I have been there, just the once like but Rio: I know how it is Nancy: Give me a war story I need to be cheered Nancy: Thanks Rio: I don't think it will 'cos literally your brother only lad decent enough and you get enough of his heroics Rio: hmm Rio: oh, I can tell you about the time I rode his friend James because that's enough to make anyone feel better about their life Nancy: OH MY GOD Nancy: James as in the boy Chloe is with? Rio: Mhmm Nancy: GROSS Nancy: I can't believe they are having a baby together Rio: I know Rio: Wanna feel sorry for a kid Rio: That's the one, like Nancy: Honestly Nancy: That has actually made me feel less sad Nancy: Thanks, Ri Nancy: Sorry I was such a bitch Rio: Don't mention it Rio: Nothing laughing at the misfortune of others can't fix Rio: Kinda Nancy: Can we mention why the hell you let James near you though? Nancy: That needs to be addressed Rio: 😒 that makes it so much worse Rio: lord Rio: cut a long story short, boyf of the time left me stranded and i needed a bed for the night Rio: bad as it sounds, so you are free to judge Nancy: Oh Nancy: Why didn't you go to ours if you were in London? Rio: Well, I was trying to avoid your brother so yeah Rio: fail all 'round Nancy: It's my house too Nancy: You can always go there even if he's being a prick Rio: Thanks for the retroactive offer, babe Rio: appreciate it Rio: as much as it'd be a laugh to come for her mans, not gonna repeat Nancy: I don't even like boys but even I can tell he wouldn't be good in bed Rio: 😬 Rio: oh god don't remind me Rio: the flashbacks 😂 Nancy: Sorry babe Nancy: He always used to flirt with me Nancy: So I'll join you in the gross flashbacks, like Rio: yeah buster said Rio: actual deviant, like Nancy: The threesome jokes, oh lord Nancy: Why James Rio: He's tragic Rio: Can't even wish Chloe on him though Nancy: I bet she'll agree to get another girl in Nancy: As long as she doesn't call me, like Rio: Ew God Rio: the phonecall no one needs Nancy: She's so bi curious we all know it Rio: 😂 you reckon Nancy: That homophobia is coming from somewhere, and in this century, come on Rio: You right Rio: gonna come out on James in like 10 years time Nancy: At least her kid might end up with one decent mum Nancy: I'm still not volunteering though Nancy: Sorry Chlo Rio: Oh snap Rio: sure one of her friends will be down Rio: cute accessory if nowt else Nancy: They've all kissed each other at enough parties Nancy: Don't start me on that Rio: I mean Rio: guilty Rio: at least I backed it up? 😬 Nancy: You need to explain yourself before I fight you Rio: 😂 but we just made up Nancy: And you weren't bullying me for liking girls then kissing them to attract boys, but Nancy: Still side eyeing you Nancy: I was gonna ask what you were doing tonight but now we have drama so, like Rio: Damn, it be like that Rio: I won't even tell you I'm free then Nancy: Invite me somewhere and I'll forgive you Nancy: Maybe Nancy: 'Cause my mum and yours are swapping babysitting duties for my aunt and I don't wanna be home for her return really Rio: Alright Rio: see what I can do Rio: you can crash at ours if nothing else, what's another head Nancy: No drinking and no clubs, yeah? Nancy: There's my only rules Rio: Got you Nancy: I need a girlfriend so you can stop taking me on dates Rio: Oh Rio: Charming Nancy: You know me and my brother don't like sharing Rio: 😏 Yeah okay Rio: nothing personal, is it? Nancy: You know I love you, babe Nancy: Not gonna say more than him but Rio: If you not willing to put up the fight, fine Rio: so defeatist, god 😉 Nancy: I deserve that okay, bitch Rio: Yeah, now we're even Nancy: I'm so sad, be nice to me Rio: I see where you're going wrong, babe Rio: that's no chat up line is it Nancy: Oh my god Nancy: Are you really hate criming me again? Nancy: Girl stop Rio: I'm giving you advice to get bitches Rio: literally could not be more of an ally thanks Nancy: I'm yet to see any actual advice Nancy: Fake fan Rio: Only 'cos you won't let me Rio: call me out for queerbaiting Nancy: When have I stopped you? Rio: It's in your eyes, babe Rio: 👀 Nancy: You know I'm shy Nancy: The eye contact is very intense, babe Rio: 😏 Tips Nancy: If you were that committed to helping me you wouldn't have taught my brother to kiss Nancy: I had to learn on my own, outrageous Rio: Like you would ever Rio: do you remember that kid who used to hang around us Rio: we couldn't think of his name Nancy: The one who dared you? Nancy: Sure Nancy: Sully Nancy: I don't know why I can remember that and not what I did earlier Rio: Omg Rio: that's it! Rio: Nice one, babe Nancy: He was so Nancy: Well, weird Rio: You know Rio: was dubious how often he was in the pub, tbf Rio: not your grandad Rio: idek what punter was his old man Nancy: I feel like it was that man who always left his teeth behind Nancy: Creeped me out Nancy: Not saying it's why I'm gay but sir, please don't Rio: 😂 Rio: ew Rio: root of all your trauma Rio: you have a good memory, I'd forgot so much of this Nancy: What I literally don't have in short term I make up for in recall, apparently Nancy: Men are so gross Rio: Committing that to memory, gotcha Rio: the talent was not all that Rio: probably didn't think they were being judged by children tho Nancy: Do you remember that barmaid? She could be why you're straight by the same logic Rio: Oh my God, I do remember her Rio: literally reminds me of that bitch from the angel Rio: sue, sharon, whatever Rio: if she wouldn't be well past it by now i'd reckon it was her, telling me off still Nancy: Right?! Nancy: Buster never got in trouble, the prick Nancy: Which still hasn't changed Rio: 🙄 such a jammy lil lickarse Rio: bless Nancy: Golden boy forever Nancy: It's not my fault I was clumsy as hell Nancy: I hadn't grown into my tallness yet okay sorry Rio: aw Rio: like bambi on ice Rio: it's so sharon, woman hater forreal Rio: soz we were cute babe Nancy: Especially me, call me hun 💋 Nancy: 😂 Rio: 😂 Rio: i know u did not want her to lips you over me Rio: that's just a barefaced lie Nancy: True Nancy: But we aren't playing truth or dare now Rio: Guess that isn't tempting enough plans then? Rio: back to the drawing board Nancy: It'd be fun Nancy: Until you got too honest about my brother Nancy: Gross Rio: You control what you ask, so don't be nosy and we'll be fine 😜 Rio: Just come over then, I'll find a shitty chickflick on netflix, get some popcorn Nancy: Okay Nancy: Are you there now? Rio: Yep, I don't know who else is exactly but it's chill Rio: no doubt gracie and bills will clamour to go with mum Rio: but can maybe tempt 'em if we got some ice cream in Nancy: I'll let Grace do my nails Nancy: They are so chipped right now Rio: Now that's an offer Nancy: She can straighten my hair too if she wants Nancy: Not gonna resist Rio: Seriously, how could she Rio: like she working on commission with them things, I swear 😏 Nancy: I'll pay her in not loudly booing every time the man is on screen Rio: 😂 that's the spirit Nancy: I can't promise I won't make it gay whenever the 'best friend' appears but you know Nancy: What can you do when its not even subtext? Rio: Idk, go storyboard some fanfiction about it probably Rio: is that not how tween you would do Nancy: I don't even wanna write when school makes me, thank you Rio: You mean you had to whack it to porn like the rest of us heathens Rio: that's so sad Nancy: Yeah Nancy: No wonder I'm such a mess, like Rio: I hope you watched gay porn 'cos lesbian is bad Rio: like bad bad Nancy: Tell me something I don't know Nancy: But there are some lesbians making it these days Nancy: Taking the fanfiction up a notch, if you like Rio: that's something Rio: but we aren't watching porn with my little sisters, sorry Nancy: Good Nancy: If you wanna come on to me I know you can be more creative than that Rio: Throwing down the gauntlet like that alright Rio: I see you 😂 Nancy: Like I said, I need a girlfriend Rio: Yeah Rio: I'll get on Tinder for you, get the ball rollin' Nancy: Don't Nancy: That's not the kind of dares we're doing Rio: Fine Rio: but I'm taken n off limits, remember Nancy: 💔 Nancy: But sure Rio: 😘 heartbreaker forever Nancy: I'll text Sully about it Rio: 100% will dare you to like hey remember me Nancy: If we can find him Nancy: How many Sullivans are there? 1000s Rio: Banking on your encyclopedic memory and my sleuthing skillz, of course Nancy: I wish I knew his actual name like Nancy: Where are you? Was that teeth man your dad? Rio: So many questions left unanswered Rio: are you fit now Rio: should i have hit that Nancy: You should've kissed him instead Nancy: Maybe he'd still be part of the gang Rio: he should've tried harder Rio: wimp, like Nancy: He was trying pretty hard you were just paying more attention to Buster Rio: Shh Nancy: 🙄 Nancy: And I didn't see this coming Nancy: Okay then Rio: I mean Rio: If anyone should've Nancy: I'm an idiot Nancy: Moving on Rio: It's alright, it's not like I kept showing him how to kiss and you were like Rio: this game has been going on too long lads Nancy: Oh my god Nancy: Don't put mental images in my head, like Rio: you know we were avoiding each other Nancy: I know that's what you said Rio: You don't trust me? 😲 Rio: Rude Nancy: I'm just saying Nancy: I've said lots of things and not said even more Rio: Mysterious Rio: Imma get the truth Rio: Sleuthing Nancy: Not if that's literally the game, babe Nancy: You won't have to work very hard Rio: Gotta ask the right questions still Rio: don't downplay my hardwork Nancy: Yeah yeah Nancy: I'm doing my own making myself look presentable so Rio: aw for me? Rio: you didn't need to do that Nancy: More 'cause I don't need Gracie asking me why I've been crying Nancy: But you can still enjoy the view Rio: Oh babe Rio: dry your eyes Nancy: They are, but the mascara ain't letting me forget Nancy: Waterproof is such a lie Rio: Preach Nancy: I've spent so much money on so many different brands Nancy: Rude, like Rio: Practically funded the research, babe Rio: do they care, no Nancy: Seriously Nancy: Let me cry I'm stressed Rio: but well-dressed Rio: what really matters Nancy: Not right now, but you're easily impressed so Rio: 😱 Rio: Literally the rudest thing you've said to me Rio: get out Nancy: Sorry but you're dating Buster Rio: 😒 Rio: square up Nancy: No Nancy: You're small but fierce Rio: Yeah and we're brawling now Rio: 🥊 Nancy: Stop trying to gay bash me Rio: Stop thinking gay and mean are personality traits, bitch 😜 Nancy: Ouch Nancy: Now that was mean Rio: Got too real Rio: you did come for my mans Nancy: He's my twin, I have to Rio: 😂 Rio: Fair, just keep it behind my back too, like Nancy: Fine Nancy: Am I actually a bitch? Rio: No Nancy: You can tell me if I am, like Nancy: I won't start a real fight over it Rio: You aren't Rio: no more than you've got right to be Nancy: That just means I am but you like it 😏 okay Rio: Steady on Rio: it means you're fine Nancy: Alright Rio: Trust Nancy: I'm raiding our fridge for snacks to bring, anything you want? Nancy: Cupboards after Rio: hmm is there anything that contains carbs/sugar in your house Rio: 'cos that's all I'm feeling Nancy: I'm the one who shops for this house so yeah Rio: 🙌 Nancy: I'm literally looting before mum returns I feel like I'm about 10 years old Rio: That's the plan, baby Nancy: Take me back Nancy: I peaked too young clearly Nancy: All been going wrong since Rio: Oh hush Rio: you the same bad bitch you was then Nancy: 😂 Rio: i'm fr hoe Nancy: You're ridiculous Rio: 😑 Nancy: I've never been a bad bitch and you can't be mad about it Rio: Disagree Nancy: How and why? Rio: I'm not gonna be gay about it Rio: but you're funny and not afraid to be yourself with it, what's not bad about that Nancy: There'd be nothing bad about it if everyone else also thought it Rio: Who cares what they think Nancy: Um...me Nancy: Obviously Rio: Why Rio: like genuine Nancy: 'Cause I had so many girls telling me negatives so many years and I don't wanna believe that they are right Nancy: Other options would be nice Nancy: Other opinions too, like Rio: Fair enough Rio: but who do you reckon doesn't think that Nancy: Nobody's changed my mind that they got anything wrong about me yet Nancy: Homophobia aside Nancy: Quinn's the only one who liked me and I proved her wrong fast enough Rio: Plenty of people like you, Nance Rio: and more would if you were more open, that's the only reason you don't feel it Rio: but that don't mean it's bad, it's just statistics Nancy: Whatever, it is what it is Rio: Not whatever Rio: people like you Rio: you should like you Nancy: This family doesn't count Nancy: No offense Rio: why not Rio: they're who you spend most your time with Rio: only makes sense to care about their opinion, like Nancy: 'Cause other than Edie none of them are gonna come for me Nancy: Granddad isn't gonna turn me away from his birthday for being a state, like Rio: you don't reckon Rio: everyone in this fam has a loud mouth Rio: if you were doing something wrong, you'd know about it, yeah? Rio: just because we can't fix everything don't mean there's no accountability, like Nancy: Just 'cause they like me doesn't make me a decent person either Nancy: So like I said, whatever Rio: 'cos we're all cunts, yeah Nancy: No, you're all biased Nancy: I'm one of you Rio: everyone's biased, anyone that likes you that'll just be 'cos they're your friend or your girlfriend whatever Rio: you never gonna get the general approval of the town like, it's a myth babe Nancy: I'll get therapy and I'll get over it Nancy: Moving on Rio: 😒 Nancy: There's too much to unpack never mind for you to fix Rio: Yeah but are you actually going to go therapy Nancy: What else am I gonna do? Rio: Good Rio: the therapist'll tell you Rio: I ain't qualified, like Nancy: Here's hoping I get a man so I don't fall in love, like Rio: Oh God Rio: Don't even play Nancy: I'm not Nancy: You know I probably would Nancy: And I want that even less than I want to tell any man my problems Rio: You would not, you know now Rio: the illusion was shattered very publicly, like Nancy: It happens to loads of people Nancy: Literally a trope, babe Nancy: We can't give me that much credit Rio: Yeah but they know how to swerve that shit better than a clueless straight teacher Rio: shut you right down Nancy: I guess we'll see Nancy: Or not Rio: Keep me posted Rio: but hurry up with them snacks rn Nancy: I'm literally telling you nothing about my confidential sessions Nancy: But yeah Nancy: On my way Rio: 🙄 Spoilsport Rio: I mean how it goes, you div Rio: 👍 Nancy: Keeping secrets is kind of my thing, sorry, babe Rio: Not tonight bitch Rio: 'less you feeling that daring Nancy: Please, your dares aren't gonna be that scary Rio: 😏 Rio: Challenge accepted Nancy: Okay
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Junior & Nancy
Junior: What are you gonna do? Nancy: I've never had less of an idea Nancy: What can I do? Junior: I wish I knew for you Junior: But no, I don't Junior: By the time I worked it out, I knew it was too late but maybe if I'd said something to you, we could've avoided it playing out like this Junior: I'm sorry Nancy: Don't apologise to me, please, I can't start sobbing outside of this office Nancy: You've done nothing wrong. It's me who messed everything up Junior: I'm sorry, no wait, scrap that Junior: You can't help what you felt Junior: You're not the first person to get a crush, everyone's just acting like it for the drama of the thing Nancy: But I chose to act on it Nancy: You didn't see her face. It was... Nancy: I've got no words for it Junior: Oh, Nance Junior: There's no other way she could react, or would've Junior: I'm not judging but how did you get this caught up? Its not like you Nancy: I thought she wanted me to. Genuinely I'm not just making an excuse Nancy: We had a connection. The way we'd talk, I didn't imagine that, I can't have Junior: At best though, that could never be more than friendship, she's a married teacher, a straight one Junior: not to go over it now, you know Junior: What a mess Junior: Tristan is being Junior: its bad Nancy: He has a right to Nancy: I'm so stupid, oh my god Nancy: They couldn't hold of mum or dad yet but when they do... Junior: Yeah but, he's trying to make it something it ain't, get the anger but I wish he'd keep the gay hate to a minimum Junior: Oh God, babe Junior: how mortifying Junior: I'll find a hole to bury you in Nancy: Thanks Nancy: I've literally become a lesbian stereotype. The predatory one Nancy: If my brother ever finds out I'm gonna have to get you to bury him too Junior: We're doing our best to keep it on the DL, strictest of confidence Junior: but if your rents talk to mine, he'll suddenly take an interest no doubt, eurgh Junior: You weren't being predatory, at least, that's now how you meant it Junior: and she's in the position of power so she always had the upper hand to push you away Junior: which, I guess, she did in the end Junior: would've been helpful if she'd have clued up before now but we can't blame her Nancy: I'm gonna have to move back, aren't I? How can I stay here. I can't Nancy: I love her and I've done this to her Nancy: What if she loses her job because of me? I might have wanted him to leave her, or vice versa, but I never wanted that Junior: Not necessarily Junior: She won't Junior: Not to rub salt in an open wound but its very clear it came from you and not her Junior: Its not going to come to that Junior: There's only this year left, we can stick it out together, I've got you Junior: anyway, rumours follow, don't they? Idk how but that's the magic of teens, better if you face it head on Junior: own it in the ways you can Nancy: You make everything sound so straightforward, no play on words meant Nancy: I should have told you everything Junior: I get why you didn't Junior: it got to be real when it was just in your head Junior: wow, sounds harsh but, yeah? Nancy: I'm gonna hear much worse Nancy: At least you're coming for a good place Junior: We need to decide on your side of the story, so we can stick to it Nancy: What's the point? Everyone already knows what happened Junior: Yeah, there's definitely the key facts you're not gonna be able to run from Junior: but its all about how you sell it Nancy: What are you saying I should do? I can't throw her under the bus Junior: No, of course not Junior: I'm not explaining it well 'cos I can't do it myself Junior: but you know, the old, hold your head up high regardless of how you're really feeling Junior: acting as if you're not as phased as you are, too, not lying about what happened, just acting as like its less of a thing so people will get bored, you know? Nancy: Have you met my mum? Holding my head up high won't be a problem Nancy: Casually trained at it Junior: Yeah, no, good Junior: I know its gonna be hard Junior: but it will help this all be over sooner Nancy: That'd be nice Nancy: It's new for the rumor mill but not me Junior: How long? Nancy: Since I came here, pretty much Junior: Oh, honey Junior: That's such a long time to have those kind of feelings Nancy: I know Nancy: How did I get here? Junior: I dunno Junior: We all build things up in our minds, fantasies and that Junior: it just got out of hand because it was uncheck Junior: like I said, you're not the first or last Junior: Its okay, it will be alright Nancy: You're only saying that to make me feel better, I get that, but it's kind of working anyway Junior: I'm honestly not Junior: You know what went down wasn't cool but I think the outcome is more than enough punishment without me needing to be a dick about it Nancy: but I wouldn't blame you if you were Nancy: You asked me so many times who I fancied, if I'd just said, it would have stopped it, I would have come to my senses enough not to try and kiss her Junior: But you wanted to Junior: more than you wanted to be logical and sensible Junior: for better, or worse, as its transpired Junior: its easy to beat yourself up about it now Nancy: I should've beat myself up before hand Nancy: Repeatedly over the head Junior: I'll get you a time-turner and a mallet, like Nancy: Much appreciated Nancy: Can you arrange a bodyguard too, for Rio more than Tristan tbh Nancy: She's gonna be livid Junior: Not with you Junior: She'll get it better than me, she's had her fair share of crushes, I'm sure Nancy: Have you really not? Nancy: Envy you at this point Junior: Nope Junior: I'm like a sexless slug Nancy: They have a nicer label for that, to let you know Junior: Yeah, I'm not into that Junior: Never say never, you know Nancy: Unlike you have my judgement Nancy: Unless* Nancy: Never say never with your straight, married, teacher Junior: When is it okay to laugh cos like Nancy: Go ahead Nancy: We have to Nancy: I can't cry rn and still face everyone Nancy: I'm not THAT good at holding my head high Junior: are you gonna take some time off or just Junior: face it from the jump Nancy: I think if I walk away it'll just make it harder to come back Nancy: If I'm staying here then I need to carry on Junior: Agreed, from that POV, definitely the best thing to do Junior: but don't force yourself to do things you can't Junior: we can go cry in the toilets whenever you need, okay? Nancy: Have a gorgeous mascara moment Nancy: Maybe my mum will force on a flight back to London Junior: Maybe Junior: Or roll up on you here Junior: such fun Nancy: Oh god, she probably will Nancy: I know I brought it on myself but....please no Nancy: Parent swap with me really quick? Junior: They'd despair but give it my best Junior: At least your Dad is going to be too awkward to say anything Junior: Small blessing Nancy: I wish that was a like father like son trait Junior: Thank god for the mute button Junior: shame it doesn't cover all communications, including IRL Nancy: Honestly Nancy: If I thought I hated Irish class before Junior: Yeah, no escaping how bad that's gonna be Junior: 😬 Nancy: If I pretend I've had a straight awakening now will that make it better or worse Nancy: She turned me everybody, nothing to see here Junior: I think it'll take you from the butt of the gay jokes to the butt of the slag ones Junior: which might be easier to handle but Junior: might have to display some straightness and we're not a convincing couple to say the least Nancy: Plus you're my cousin Nancy: That'd just create more rumors Junior: Yeah preferably you're going straight for someone not in the fam Junior: Idk, who are the most elligible bachelors around Junior: Hmm Nancy: Tristan's off the table Nancy: Lovehate only happens in YA Junior: Plus, all that rage, probably closeted himself, if we're following the rules of YA to the letter Nancy: And if we're going classical, he probably wants to sleep with his mum too Junior: 🤢 Junior: oh no Junior: flip the script on 'em, go for a younger boy Junior: preferably not weird young, like year below tops Nancy: Oh god Nancy: Boys are so Nancy: Even hypothetically it's a no Junior: 😂 Junior: I don't think you're gonna be pulling this off effectively any time soon Nancy: You're right. Back to the drawing board I go Nancy: Thanks, June, for talking me off the ledge Junior: Wouldn't be worth much as a bestie if I didn't Junior: we've got this Junior: it only FEELS like the end of the world Junior: that's comforting, right? 😏 Nancy: Until I think about how bad you said Tristan is handling what happened Junior: Yeah, well, reckon Rio will be having words Junior: he just needs to get it out of his system Junior: look sufficiently sorry and miserable and he should be satisfied, then you can get on with your life, like Nancy: I do feel sorry and miserable so as long as I can get it across instead of looking like a unrepentant bitch Nancy: We'll see Junior: Yeah Junior: he's not awful, like Junior: It probably sucks having teacher parents, but that ain't a reason to take out years of frustration on this sitch Nancy: He can't be that bad, she raised him Junior: Oh, babe Junior: you've got it so bad Nancy: I wish there was a mute button for feelings Junior: You've got to start putting in the work Junior: Conscious uncoupling Nancy: That'll be as much fun as having the chat with my parents Junior: I didn't promise fun Junior: Strictly business Nancy: This is why lesbians die at the end of every movie, isn't it? Nancy: No fun Junior: Mhmm, its not just bed death you've gotta avoid Junior: its alright, you've been scorned, that'll further your plot development, no need to die today Nancy: Just living with the heartbreak then. Fantastic Junior: Unfortunately Junior: Its survivable, so I'm told Junior: and there's lots of songs and films on the subject to keep you company Nancy: You're angling for a hetero rom-com watching session because the male leads are always hot. I see you Junior: You need some straight drama in your life Junior: it will make you feel so much better about your own Nancy: Her being straight was a big part of my drama Junior: Yes and no Junior: Even if she was gay, Nance, it wouldn't have happened, alright? Junior: You need to remember that Junior: what if you have a nice lesbian lecturer at Uni, you don't wanna go through this again, thinking it'll be different Junior: its a no go whatever the circumstances Nancy: I know Nancy: I'm trying Nancy: I don't want to go through this again Junior: I know Junior: Its a complete perspective overhaul Junior: It'll take time Junior: you'll get there Nancy: I better Nancy: I don't wanna be stuck here in this place Junior: You won't be Junior: You've got a whole life of new, better experiences waiting Nancy: Brain swap? If I was as smart as you I could graduate early Junior: You're plenty smart, its truly not that far off now Junior: Final stretch Nancy: You're right. It just feels like forever rn Nancy: My own fault Junior: It does though Junior: clock watching all day every day Nancy: Definitely Nancy: Same
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