#and the extra sad thing is that his base fears weren't even misplaced

[chayannesegg]

listen, i absolutely get ramon not wanting to talk to sunny & feeling hurt/betrayed by her helping tubbo

like, i'd hazard he might even feel more betrayed by them than tubbo himself—bc sunny & ramon probably talked about what family meant to him (during their sleepovers or something) and ramon has no insight into why they'd do that whereas tubbo, for all his actions have hurt ramon, very clearly has the emotional capacity of a wet paper plate and issues running deeper than marianas trench

but that makes it all the more heart wrenching that he won't hear her out (and you can see in the backgrounds of vods her multiple attempts over several days to get his attention just to be rebuffed) bc i bet if she could explain herself even a little things could be so different

it reminds of the situation from the other week where sunny wasn't talking with em and tubbo tried to explain that, even if you're mad at them, suddenly stopping talking to someone you love could make them feel awful and worse than you intended

and that is what's happening to sunny. it's miserable to see bc she was already so isolated and ramon, as her big brother, is someone she put a lot of trust in to be there for her and listen to her and it must feel to her like that was an empty promise to have him not even hearing her out.

and it's particularly tragic bc sunny didn't even want to mess with fit and pac. yes, she was "tempted" to aid tubbo in his quest, but I really don't think it was bc she was actually worried about being left behind when she agreed. i think she could tell tubbo was scared and hurting and not ready to accept the change and didn't want him to be alone. she didn't really have another option and every adult can see that but ramon is young and blinded by his hurt

and now sunny is left feeling abandoned and forgotten and replaced and it's exactly what their pa said would happen; self fulfilling prophecy :(

#qsmp sunny #qsmp ramon #and it IS tubbo's fault #but the trust fractured between sunny and ramon isn't something I think he can fix #they need to talk themselves #he's set his own daughter up to experience exactly what he feared #and the extra sad thing is that his base fears weren't even misplaced #the morning crew dynamics are shifting with the relationship and with the return of mike and addition of bagi #and they are the most vulnerable to being left behind #and he lashed out bc of it but sunny is accidentally suffering the most #where ramon got a huge explosion of family sunny just got more isolated #where everyone can see tubbo's insecurities a mile off sunny's are more hidden #where tubbo can talk his mouth off sunny's voice is silenced just by looking away from her #like she's SO vulnerable #i am going insane thinking about how vulnerable she is it's so horrible #qtubbo please i know ur just a mentally ill 20yo crying for help but she needs so much support and ur the only one there #qsmp

[whosaskingwrites]

Fickle Love (Akaashi x Reader x Bokuto)

A/N: So this was supposed to be for Akaashi's birthday...whoops. But its here now lmao ngl I just kinda wrote with no idea in mind and this is what ended happening so yeah. Hope you enjoy and happy late birthday to Akaashi 💞

Details: 7.8 pages 2,758 words

Date: December 8th, 2020

Warnings: Mentions of poly relationships I guess, angst if you squint, Gn! Reader not really a warning but I didn't know where else to put it

Theme: Akaashi wasn't the best when it came to love. Having a habit of ignoring you and burying himself in work. Leading you to turn to Bokuto which leads to some revelations and a question for Akaashi.

Love was a fickle thing Akaashi knew. People fell in and out of love all the time so he never trusted love. He didn't want love he wanted to avoid it. Avoid the heartbreak he was positive would follow. But instead he met you a bright-eyed student in his class. It took almost nothing for you to mesh yourself into his life completely and making yourself comfortable like you belonged there.

It took even less time for you to weasel your way into his heart and make yourself comfortable. Only a year after you'd met and he asked you out deciding that love may not have been as fickle as he thought.

Four years later and he knew he had been wrong love was indeed fickle and his proof was in the sight across the street from him. There you stood hands clasped around Bokuto's as he kissed your cheek. He waved before running off and Akaashi rushed home preparing for the worst.

A few hours later you slipped through the door "Keiji? I'm home!" You called hearing the soft pads of feet come up to you. Love was fickle he knew you were going to lie when he asked his next question "Hey Y/n. What did you do today?" You suprised him though. Only after you'd gotten over the shock of being called Y/n and not darling.

"I went to lunch with Bokuto today," You said happily slipping off your coat and hanging it up. He certainly didn't expect you to be honest about what you did today. He loosened up a tad bit in response "Oh? Why?" You laughed at his question "Bo needs contact with us you know that. But you haven't been answering his calls so we went shopping and I filled him in on how you were. Afterwards I treated him to lunch as a thank you," You smiled up at him eyes bright with nothing hidden.

"Yeah? Did you guys hold hands so he wouldn't lose you?" He joked and you shook your head "He grabbed my hands at the end of lunch because I promised him I'd bring you next time," you had laughed remembering the incident. Relief flooded him then no of course you weren't cheating on him that'd be insane. You were as loyal as Bokuto was plus he couldn't keep a secret to save his life and neither could you. He relaxed as he realized how wrong he was to assume something.

"Im sorry," He said suddenly while you tilted your head in confusion. "What for?" You had asked before Akaashi leaned down and pressed a kiss to your forehead. "I forgot to give you your welcome home kiss," He rolled off casually hiding the fear he'd felt earlier. This fear had only continued to grow as the days went on but it was his fault anyway.

_______________________________________________________

"Keiji are you free today?" "No I'm busy," "Oh...Okay," 

"Keiji we haven't gone on a date in weeks!" "Im not stopping you from going out somewhere," "I want to go out with you though,"

"Keiji-" "Im busy Y/n,"

Two weeks this cycle continued as you walked to Akaashi's at home office. Two taps against the door and you opened it "Kei-" His eyes snapped up frustration was on his face but he took a breath before it faded. "What?" You sighed turning to leave again "...Im going out to lunch with Kotaro again. He says hi by the way," You left the room quickly and Akaashi blinked 'Kotaro?' Surely you meant Bokuto but there was no way you two were on a first name basis it'd only been a few days since the last lunch.

His eyes landed on the calender and he froze what had only been a few days to him was actually two weeks but still too short for a first name basis. You'd only know Bokuto for a few months and he'd known the male for years and still never used his first name.

He sighed returning to his work. He'd question you when you got back from lunch he didn't have the time to right now. Nor did he know your location so going to find you was like a needle in a haystack. A very big bustling city of a haystack and the needle being you with a slightly bigger needle in the shape of a volleyball player next to you.

He continued work for a few hours before his office door was thrown open. He expected many things when he looked up but he didn't expect Bokuto. But what got him was the fact that Bokuto was furious it was a look he'd never seen before on him. The glare he had on his face was enough to make Akaashi freeze. 

He knew Bokuto was typically happy like a dog but right now he felt fearful since now he staring down an angry German Shepard who was defending their owner. It was silent for a long moment before Bokuto spoke. "What the fuck is wrong with you?" Akaashi felt his blood turn to ice at the tone Bokuto used.

"W-what?" He cursed silently at his own stutter Bokuto would latch onto the weakness he showed. "Whats today Akaashi?" Bokuto had asked in that same icy tone. It was so razor sharp and cold that Akaashi was convinced the room cooled and ten degrees.

"...Its December 1st Bokuto-san," He elected to answer the question instead of ask why Bokuto didn't call him Keiji. Based on the mood Bokuto was displaying he didn't expect to be called Keiji. However supplying the date only seemed to rile him up more as his glare sharpened.

Akaashi shivered involuntarily at it "Are you forgetting something?" He barked out and it was then that Akaashi realized Bokuto hadn't blinked yet. "No," he was confident in the answer. Your birthday wasn't until b/d and his was in four days. Bokutos had already passed but said male wouldn't have been mad at him. Sad maybe but not mad.

"Oh really? Then tell me why Y/n is at my place crying because you forgot that today is your anniversary," Bokuto had stepped towards him in anger and Akaashi took in involuntarily step back in fear. "They're at your place?" Akaashi asked and Bokutos jaw clenched.

"Yeah. And they are going to stay there until you sort yourself out," Bokuto growled turning and slamming the door closed with enough force to crack it. Akaashi stood frozen for a few extra moments trying to regain his composure after being afraid. He shook his head as he processed Bokuto's last sentence.

No you'd always come back to him, even if a fight had broken out between him and you, you would always come back. You had to come back he was your fiancé and the wedding was going to be in the upcoming w/f/s/s so he continued to work shaking off his encounter with Bokuto that had manage to worm a tiny bit of fear back into his heart.

__________________________________________________

Akaashi didn't fully leave his office again until December 5th. He'd left it plenty of times before then but only for something quick eat or the bathroom or something to drink. In these moments he never bothered to look around the place but now on his birthday he did.

He expected to be greeted by your sparkling voice like you had done for the past four years but instead the house was silent. "Y/n?" He called out walking around the house was still perfectly clean. The last time he could recall hearing you was on the first with the vacuum running and the patter of your feet running around.

Since then he realizes the house had been silent except for his movements. As he walked into the dining room something glinted on the table in the early morning light. When he turned to look he froze there was your engagement ring. The thin band of silver sat there almost mockingly on a yellow sticky note.

He picked up the note and written on it were a few simple words. 'They aren't coming home - Bokuto' his brain filled in the missing words Bokuto had told him a few days ago "Not until I fix myself," he mumbled thumbing at the sticky in his hands. He knew what Bokuto meant he'd been borderline ignoring you for weeks to work.

Thoughts of your anniversary had left his mind but he didn't think it was that bad until right now. Forgetting had been the final nail in the coffin for you but he still had a chance. You weren't gone forever just temporarily misplaced. He rushed to shower and go buy flowers his brain running a mile a minute trying to figure out how to get you back and apologize.

He felt nervous and he was unsure of why until he remembered where you had taken up residence. Bokuto had never been scary to him, just a bright ball of happiness but the fear Bokuto had instilled in him a few days ago had lingered, and he was about to walk right into the lion's den.

__________________________________________________

He couldn't see you as he approached the door. Maybe you were tucked away upstairs or in a place the windows didn't show but he'd seen Bokuto. The male was pacing clearly on edge and definitely dangerous but Akaashi would have to face him sooner or later so with a shaking hand he knocked.

Only half a second later the door swung open and Bokuto stood there mouth set in a hard line. Akaashi fought to supress the shiver that wanted to trail up his spine. "Is Y/n here?" He asked and once again cursed himself for sounding so meek. It was just Bokuto he wouldn't hurt him the man couldn't even hurt a fly! Although that sentiment didn't hold much when he felt like he was staring down the loaded barrel of a gun.

"Yes," Bokuto answered after a few beats of silence. His eyes raked over Akaashi's form judging him and seeing if he was ready to have Y/n back. "Can I see them? I'd like to talk," He was definitely playing with fire when Bokuto looked back up at his eyes. "About what?" He asked lowly Akaashi noted that Bokuto was staying quiet which meant you had to be downstairs. "I'd like to apologize for ignoring them and forgetting our anniversary," Bokuto nodded once before swinging the door closed.

He blinked in mild suprise "Bo-Bokuto-san?" He questioned wondering where he went wrong that warranted the door being closed. He was about to knock again when the door opened revealing you. Your h/c hair was slightly messy and e/c eyes half lidded in sleep.

What Akaashi didn't like was the MSBY jersey that swallowed you figure. The number 12 emblazoned on the front and long enough to cover your thighs. He couldn't tell if you were wearing pants but he hoped you did. You never walked around his house like this unless it was after a fun night but he couldn't assume things. Not now and he especially couldn't accuse you of cheating when Bokuto was on the staircase right behind you.

He could see that the golden eyed male was poised to attack when the conversation would start heading south. You tilted your head in confusion "Hello Akaashi," You had mumbled and he did flinch then. No pet names or his first name no, you had decided on formal. "Hi darling," He whispered the pet name but you merely shook your head.

"Why are you here?" The genuine confusion on your face made Akaashi feel a lot worse about everything. "Im here to apologize and seeing as its my birthday id like my present from you to be going on one date with me," He said slowly "Please," was tacked on as an afterthought. You turned your head eyes meeting Bokuto's and Akaashi hated the jealousy that crawled up his spine when his eyes softened.

"Um actually Akaashi I wanted to talk to you about something," Your hands had balled into fists tightly gripping the hem of the shirt you wore. A nervous habit you had whenever something scared you. He felt his heart drop in response to those words and you shook your head. "No no! It's nothing bad- well I guess that depends on how you feel about it," You were quick to try and sooth him and Akaashis heart swelled at the fact that right now even if you weren't getting along you still worried about him.

He didn't even realize you had led him inside until he was on the couch. His eyes trailed over you figure as you sat across from him. The shirt rode up enough exposing part of your thigh and Akaashi could see the hem of a pair of shorts. They followed their path until his eyes rested on the new gold band around your ring finger. It was decorated in a series of small gems that were the same blue as his eyes and he took a deep breath.

"What is it?" He lightly questioned when the silence began suffocating him. Bokuto was behind him somewhere he felt the stare being burned into his back. The second this conversation possibly turned south Bokuto was ready to jump in. "Well...I was wondering how you felt about the two of us becoming um...three of us?" You looked down afterwards hands nervously ringing together.

"...three of us?" He wanted more clarification were you implying a kid or something else? You hummed meeting his eyes before they flickered to the male that was behind him 'oh' it pieced itself together then. You were implying a poly relationship with him and Bokuto. He must have been quiet for too long since your hands began rubbing at your sides.

He scrambled for an answer he knew he was unbothered by it but this was...The two of you were only a few months away from getting married and you wanted to add Bokuto into the mix? Now of all times? He took a shuttering breath as he thought.

"Well...I guess I have to call the restaurant and tell them to change the reservation for three people then," he offered a small smile and your head whipped up. "Really?" You whispered and he could only supply a nod. 

"Yeah now when I'm busy with work the both of you can harass me into taking a break," it was a poor attempt at a joke but you had laughed anyway. He heard a chuckle from behind him as well and he breathed out a sigh of relief. "Keiji are you sure? I don't wanna make you uncomfortable or anything...," you trailed off and he smiled "im sure but are you sure about Bokuto? Hes a little chaotic," He asked "Hey!" Bokuto had an immediate reaction to the accusation.

You laughed reaching out and taking his hand "So is it a fancy dinner place?" You asked as Bokuto came over to take your free hand. He watched your thumb move back and forth across Bokutos hand a comforting gesture and he noticed the minute shake of Bokuto's hand. Unconsciously he reached out with his free hand and took Bokuto's which seemed to startle him slightly as wide gold eyes met his.

Akaashi gave a light squeeze and Bokuto settled with a sigh. "Its the restaurant I originally proposed at so yeah I'd go with fancy," he answered after a second. "You're making me get dressed up for your birthday dinner? Despicable really," you dramatically sighed and he found himself laughing. "Well I suppose we don't have to go since you've already given me the best present I could ask for today," He smiled tilting his head to the side and looking at Bokuto who was sitting cross-legged on the floor with a look of concern on his face.

"You alright Bo?" He looked up at the unfamiliar nickname eyes meeting Akaashi's once again. "M'fine just...I don't own a suit," He said quietly. The silence that stretched afterwards for a long moment before you broke it. "Kotaro what do you mean you don't own a suit you're a professional athlete!" "It wasn't an issue until now!" He shouted back love was fickle yes but as he watched you and Bokuto interact he knew

It was fickle but he wouldn't trade it in for anything.

#haikyu #haikyu x reader #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu!! #whosaskingfluff #akaashi x reader #koutarou bokuto #keiji akaashi #bokuto x reader #bokuto fluff #akaashi fluff