#and i went 😧 and then let him do it and i cried so hard

[therandomcantina]

unlocking new emotions at the chiropractor’s office

#woke up yesterday morning unable to turn my head bc of excruciating pain on the right side of my neck #extended family all were like ‘go to the chiro!!’ and my mom got me a last minute appointment so i went #and i didn’t want him to do a head yank adjustment but he was like mmm time for adjustment #and i went 😧 and then let him do it and i cried so hard #cried totally uncontrollably because it hurt so badly #cried for thirty minutes #personal

[sugar-omi]

i start school in 12 hours 😧

so to keep from losing my sanity imma ramble about how Cove would make school fun if you hate it, like me!

Going to school with him, rather it's by bus, car, or on foot is always nice bc you guys can just talk and hang out on your own.

If someone ever tries to start shit w you, he's there and ready to kick ass. (not literally, he's a gentle giant. i mean unless he really has to)

If you get easily burnt out and lack motivation to do your school work, you guys can have study sessions!!! although results may vary when it comes to how much work you actually get done 💀

Sits next to you in all your classes and pouts when your schedules don't line up. Promises to see you at lunch and if you hate the caf like me he makes it soo much more bearable just by being there.

If you're a complainer like me, he'll listen to you and give solutions

his solutions: "let's just skip."

you don't tho. not too often at least

i feel like Cove would definitely be the type to skip for you. Like you tell him you're not going to school and he's already at your window like 'ok so what are WE gonna do then?'

doesn't matter if he was dressed and ready to go, he doesn't wanna be there without you.

UGH HES THE BEST I NEED HIM SO BAD

THAT LAST BIT MADE ME SMILE

school was hard for me socially n I never did the homework, so cove would definitely help you do the homework even if you end up copying some of his answers

socially, like I said before he tries to take thr heat off you. and I agree he doesn't rlly get physical!!! but if someone is giving you a hard time he comes up behind them, puts a hand on their shoulder.. "why don't you stop bothering them?"

or will stand in between you and crosses his arms. cove isn't that scary but he doesn't care abt that, he just wants to protect you

will indulge in your complaints too!!! even shares his own complaints. AND BACK TO THAT SKIPPING THING

okay just to set the scene, let's say you're really stressed and end up having an anxiety attack or feel one coming on before class. cove pulls you to a secluded spot and you end up calming down and crying while he holds you, eventually falling asleep with your head in his lap while he stands guard.

after that, whenever you get stressed or tired. anything like that, he finds a spot you guys can hide and you'll skip class.

you try not to do it often since they'll end up calling your parents, but you treasure those little moments bc he'll share a snack or doodle w you, or even better play more hangman w you <333

will play tic-tac-toe in the middle of class!!!

also I love cove climbing thru your window fully dressed for school and he's like "so, what did you dream last night bc I dreamed I was a SHARK which was rlly cool but then you were a fish n I ate u and I woke up and cried-"

this man is crazy istg

omg if this is like step 3 n youre dating he'll walk you to all your classes and squeezes your hand goodbye bc he's too embarrassed to kiss in front of your classmates n teacher (definitely does it once on the cheek and RUNS AWAY)

yall never live down how lovesick you are I promise

OMG SENDS TERRI AND RANDY TO DELIEVER MESSAGES OR SNACKS N STUFF

once had terri deliever a little sticky note w a heart on it or smth and terri went "omg yall are so CHEESY EVEN WHEN YOURE APART" randy is giggling and teasing you too

omg imagine he's in PE and he sees you. he runs to the door or window and looks back and forth before he steals a hug or kiss (pls kiss him, if not you owe him 2 kisses to replenish his energy fully)

teacher: holden! get back here. stop making out w y/n!

cove: *jumps 10 feet* y-yes! omg.... I'll see you later y/n<3

#olba #cove holden #cove holden x reader

[aleksa-sims]

RL Simself-Story (18+)

⚠ CW: addiction, drugs, drug use, withdrawal, memory loss ⚠

After I visited my parents, I?......I  blew it! Really blew it!! 🤦‍♀️ 🤦‍♀️......

Two days ago, I stayed with my parents, when I was visiting them. 

Ana was not well. I told you a few weeks ago, that Ana was at a doctor. Because of all the party drugs she took during the summer. The worst was behind Ana, but she still suffered from anxiety and sometimes had quite severe depressive episodes. 

And.....all this totally devastated my parents. I caught my mom crying in the kitchen. When my parents were with Ana at this doctor, my mom also told him about my drug addiction & my situation. This doc warned my mom! She MUST stop running after me and helping me out with money. It was so hard for my mom! She was lost. She couldn’t help me anymore, so what should she do? Watch me die?... My dad realized, there might be no way out of this vicious circle for me. So he gave up. 😔 My parents were told, that with force, they will not achieve anything with me! They should only be there for me when I need them or decide to get clean. Knowing they can do nothing for me but wait and hope, that one day, I will make the right decision, has totally destroyed both. My mom even made the same suggestion like last time to me! If I can’t get clean without Daniel, she’ll help him, too!! I told my mom I’d agree to it, but I didn’t know about Daniel? 😟 I will try my best to get him to do it. That’s what I said to my mom when I left the next day. 

While Daniel was at work, I met Sofia as in the days before. I was so high that I slept through our therapy session that Daniel and I had together. 😢 🤦‍♀️ He was waiting for me in front of that building, where our therapy took place. He tried to call me several times, but I didn’t hear my phone. He was really worried about me, so he went home to see, if I was there? Meanwhile I called Daniel back, to pick me up from Sofia. Well! And because we were not at our therapy session, again, our doc stopped our prescription for a week as a warning! The next time we miss, we’re kicked out of that drug replacement therapy. Now Daniel & I had to do without our pills for a whole week! 😱 💩

I got the first withdrawal symptoms on the second day without pills and Daniel after just one day! I knew Daniel wouldn’t let me go, to get us drugs, so I called Dominick. Dominick was not home because of his job, so I decided to go and take care of this matter myself. Just before I left, Daniel, we had a fight about it. I can’t wait and watch us both get worse and worse. I was tired of waiting for someone to help me/us. I can call Mike and it’s done! Just because Daniel has a problem with me seeing Mike, we’re both supposed to torture ourselves to death and wait for Dominick? No! I just didn’t see the point! It’s not like I’ve never met a dealer before, yk.🤷‍♀️

M. met me in the same place as always. Sofia also bought drugs, so we went together. After we had our drugs, Sofia offered me a line. I wondered, where the hell did she get that money? Sofia enthusiastically told me about her new job in a bar, where men are not stingy with their tips. I listened to Sofia a bit, while she shared her drugs with me. And then it happened again! 😧 🤦‍♀️ Just like last time! My memories were gone! I was with Sofia a few hours on the road, but I have NO idea what we have done? The last thing I could remember is that we both cried and sat on the ground, in the same place where we met Mike. Crying, I just emptied my entire bag on the street to look for my phone & my fucking drugs. I didn’t care that all the people who passed by looked at us strangely. 

Sofia and I just acted like two totally broken, drugged freaks. I only remembered fragments. Sofia and I were in the subway and 4 young guys, maybe 18 years old, sat down next to us. Sof and I were fine? But we constantly dozed off!! Every few secs I woke up and I saw Sofia totally sleepy/high. She had her head leaning against the window. Confused I told Sofia, that a stranger was kissing her neck! 😦 But Sofia could hardly move and didn’t really react. She was sitting across from me and next to her, were two of these guys and the other two, were next to me! When Sofia woke up, she saw one of those guys sitting next to me, with his hands under my shirt, while the other guy had his hands somewhere else on my body. I swear, I didn’t noticed any of that!!! 🤦‍♀️ 😠 Suddenly Sofia got up! She grabbed my arm and dragged me behind her. We went to the doors and wanted to get off at the next stop. BUT...I was to slow, I lost Sofia! The subway door closed in front of me. I couldn’t exit the wagon and was now alone without Sofia. “Oh, fuck”, I said. Was the last clear thing I could remember. Sofia and I were apart for a while. What I did afterwards, I don’t know anymore! I only have in my mind, how I went around alone & totally high. 😔 Somehow, who knows HOW?? Sofia and I found each other again and I think, that we cried because we lost each other??

Anyway, when I found my phone, Sofia called Daniel for me, because I was way too high and needed forever for everything I did. While we were waiting for him, I noticed Sofia’s hickeys on her neck, so I also remembered this shit in the subway and told her. But why didn’t anyone help Sofia & me? Probably nobody wanted to help two drug addicted bitches, who just can’t get enough? And who knows? Maybe it looked like Sofia and I wanted or tolerated that? I just don’t know???? 😒 🤦‍♀️ We were so lucky that we were not robbed or much worse happened.

After a short while, Daniel came. He found me there, sitting on the ground, he was really shocked & sad. I could see that in his eyes.

I apologized to him. I felt so BAD! It was just because of me, that we had to do without pills. That’s why I couldn’t help it! I had to do something! But I should have gone home as soon as I had our fucking drugs and not doing lines with Sofia in that damn park.😠...Daniel wasn’t angry with me, he was more sad & tired. He said I don’t have to apologize to him. For anything! Besides, this strange guy, who watched Sofia and me last time in this place, was back! Mike asked me the other day, if I know the guy with the black Hoddie, who stared at me?....Honestly, I didn’t get any of that anyway. I was just clinging to Daniel. I could barely stand and almost fell asleep in his arms. I could only hear him asking Sofia, why this guy is looking at us so pissed? Daniel thought Sofia and I might got in a fight with that weirdo or something? Then I heard Sofia nervously telling Daniel that this guy was watching us a few days ago. She was kind of scared of him and just wanted to leave. Daniel got nervous too. The longer he looked at this stranger, the more uncomfortable he felt. So we went home....

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#ts4 #sims 4 #sims 4 story #my rl with my simself #simself #myrlgameplay #18+ content #tw addiction #tw drugs #tw drug use #tw sex assault

[aleksa-sims]

My RL gameplay (18+)

!CW! addiction, durgs, break-up

This bloody shower! 🤦‍♀️  We’ve done so much bullshit in this shower, especially Philip & I. And Nico & I, we always discussed our problems in our shower, which was mostly a bit irritating, but....ok! And right here, everything ended with us. 😢 💔 The next morning I went straight to the bathroom & took a shower . After a while N. came to me and I thought everything was fine and that this argument from last night would be forgotten again. But I was wrong.

Me: Is something wrong? 😟 You’re not like usual when we shower together.

Nico: I’m gonna miss that coconut smell so much on you, babe.🙁

Me: You know, I’ve been really sad these last few weeks, when I was in our shower, and all your stuff reminded me of you. I cried all the time. That’s why I went with P. It was so hard for me in our apartment without you. But we can do it, right N.? 🙂...😟

Nico: I’m so sorry! 🙁 🤦‍♂️ I ruined everything! That idea I had with P...., that was totally crazy of me! Ok this sex thing, but everything that came after that, was just stupid & selfish of me. I just didn’t want you to be alone when I’m not here, and I trust P. and I also thought it would be better for you with him.

Me: Actually it was all fine, but then suddenly....Idk exactly what went wrong?

Nico: I never really wanted to share you with P., and when I left, I noticed this. But it’s my fault, and I’m so sorry. I know you can’t decide between us, but you can’t go on like this. Everything was fine with you, but then you started taking drugs again, exactly when it became more & more difficult between the three of us. That’s why I’m going! You don’t have to decide, I did this to you and P.,, so I’m just not coming back. 😔 🙁

Me: NO! 😨 I don’t want this! Pls, N.!

Nico: Then come with me!

Me: I can’t do this! What should I do in Italy? What kind of job am I supposed to do there, N.? Yeah, I can speak the language, but I can’t speak it perfectly. You know what I mean?

Nico: I’m going to go get dressed, please come out for a moment, I need to explain some things to you and give you our keys and everything.

Me: N., wait? 😲 What are you doing? 😟 😢 Pls don’t! I don’t want the keys! Keep it!  You’ll need it when you get home.

Nico: I’m so sorry! So, so sorry! 🙁 🙁 I never wanted to do this to you! But it has to be! It can’t go on like this! And you fucking know it! So stop it and get your life back together! 😟

Me: Are you fucking crazy now? 😧 I don’t want to get my life together without you! I only did this for you with P.! And now you just leave me alone? Just because I did what you wanted me to do? 😭 😢....I hate you N.! Just go! I never want to see you again! 😭

Nico: I don’t want to leave you either, I love you, but there is no other way! You have to do this now without me and you have P.! You are not alone! And I continue to pay the rent for our apartment for the next 6 months. So if you can’t stand your parents anymore, you still have your home here.😟 🙁

Me: You don’t think I’m gonna do this shit with my parents now? Why? 😩🤷‍♀️ I don’t want it anymore! I don’t want anything more! I just want to forget! 😰 😭  And I can only do this with one thing! So get the fuck out of here and leave me alone. 😠

Nico: Please don’t give up! I won’t let you ruin your life!

Me:  But you’re doing this rn! 😠 😭 So what’s all this shit?

Nico: Promise me you’ll do anything to get better, and who knows? Maybe one day, we’ll see each other again, and then....I’ll just get you back to me. I promise you that! 🙁 😟

Me: But maybe I don’t want that anymore! Maybe I’ll be with someone else and be happy, just like you, maybe I’ll stay with Philip forever.

Nico: I don’t care! No matter who you or I will be with, I will get you back. And as for Philip, don’t worry, I’ve discussed everything with Philip. Between him and me, everything is ok! Only in the next 6 months I don’t want to have any contact with him. I have to get along and live my life without you. You hurt me too, so much! But the time with you here in our apartment, I will never forget. It was great with you! 🙁 You were perfect! And I’m sorry that I put you under so much pressure. 🤦‍♂️ Trust me one last time, when I tell you, this is gonna be okay. Philip knows everything, he’ll be right here. I’ll go now! ILY! And please take care of yourself and trust me. Everything will be fine! 😟 😔 😔

Me: 😧 😨........😭😭😭😭

After that I sat down on the bed and started crying terribly. I couldn’t stand this pain, so I got the drugs I hid last night and took something. After that, I went back to the bathroom and tried to understand what had just happened. I mean, everything was okay a few minutes ago. I just sat down on the floor and let the water down on me. And.... I swear! Nico was standing suddenly in front of me. 😦 🤷‍♀️ I thought I was dreaming all this. But Philip wasn’t there yet, he was stuck in traffic and N. just couldn’t leave me without P. being with me. It was so hard for him to leave me. 😞

Nico: What- ...What are you doing? You’re sitting in the shower with your underwear! 🤦‍♂️ Damn it! Please! Stop this shit finally! 🙁

Me: Haaa? 😵 🤔 ....N., are you really still here? 😲

Nico: Philip needs a while, come out of the shower, please!

Me: You came back to me! 🙂 I love you N.! 😳 We just stay together forever.

Nico: No, babe! I’m flying away and I’m not coming back, I’m just waiting for P.! Then I’m gone. 🤦‍♂️ 😞

Me: Then I don’t want to get out of the shower. Just go and leave me alone, please! And stop calling me babe, I never liked this anyway! 😒

Nico: Please don’t make it harder for me! Just get out of the shower. You’re already freezing cold.

Me: Come to me N.! 🤗 Please! I want to feel you one last time.

Nico: I can’t! It’ll only hurt us more.🙁 😔

Me: Please N.! 🥺 😢 Just come to me! 🙁

Nico: You’re killing me!

Me: And you me.....

After a few minutes, Philip came and separated me from N.. Philip didn’t know who to go to first? To me or N.? Nico didn’t say a word. He was kind of totally absent. P. knew about everything. I mean about our breakup. He took me to the bedroom and then went down with N. He said goodbye to him and also P. was totally sad! He just felt guilty and....shit.  😕 😢  After that, he came back to me and helped me get dressed. The conversation between P & I is under the cut.

Philip: I’m so sorry, A.! 🙁 If you want me to leave and Nico stays, just say, I won’t be mad at you! I love you! I just want to do the right thing.

Me: No, Nico just doesn’t want me anymore! 😭 He wanted to go, P.! And if you want to go too, just go! Fuck off!

Philip: He didn’t want to go! Believe me! 😞 But he blames himself for your situation and he just can’t go on like this . He had to leave to let things run their course.

Me: What are you talking about? 🤷‍♀️  Just like Nico! You talk so much shit! I don’t understand a word of that bullshit!

Philip: I tried to talk him out of it! For hours! But he is convinced that with me you will be able to get clean again. He just wants to fix everything he thinks he screwed up.  And I don’t think Nico’s gonna be gone forever. Trust me! I think everything will be fine soon. 😟

Me: No, it’s not P.! I knew something bad was going to happen! And it’s not over yet! It’s just begun. 😰 I love him so much! I can’t live without him, 😭 and I don’t want to. If you were gone now, that would be just as bad for me. I’m afraid of losing you, too. Idk if I can go on with you without constantly thinking about N. 😢 You’re gonna get really mad at me again.

Philip: No, don’t worry about me! I promise, I’ll never let you down, no matter what! I promised you once, and you promised me.

Me: Yeah, just like N.! But he just left anyway.

Philip: You know why he had to go! He has no choice! And you could have gone with him, but you’re not. But this is ok! We can do this! I’m taking you to your parents now.

Me: I don’t want to go to my parents anymore, I don’t want to explain or tell them why I’m so fucked up now. 😭

Philip: You can’t stay here A.! 😧 🙁 You have to go to your parents to be safe, and you don’t have to explain anything to them. I’ll talk to them, is that okay with you?

Me: And you? 😟 🙁 What about you? Are you staying with me or what do you want P.?

Philip: If you want, I’ll stay with you of course, but I think it’s better for you to be without me in the next few days. Because of N. and all that. You have Ana or Sandra, but if you need me, I’ll stay with you. 🙁

Me: I don’t know P.? I’m afraid! It hurts so much! Idk how to do this? I don’t want to cry for N. or be sad, I just want to numb this horrible feeling.

Philip: Whether you want it or not, A.! It will take you a few days to.... grieve, And after that, you can use me to distract you from all that pain. I don’t mind as long as you’re feeling better. 😟

Me: I would never take advantage of you, especially not because of Nico! You’re my best friend and I love you. 😢

Philip: I love you too, A.! You know, it’s not easy for me either.  To see N. as fucked up as just now, that hit me really hard.🙁 🤦‍♂️ He is my best friend and I NEVER wanted that for him and not for you either! I feel responsible for this and really bad. 🙁 😔

Me: No, P.! Don’t blame yourself!..... Do you think we’ll see him again sometime? He said to me that you know and that he will one day bring me back.

Philip: Uhm...yea. As for this, A.! I can’t tell you more, just....trust me! Everything will be fine. I don’t think N. will be gone forever, but I’ll explain the rest when you get better.

I didn’t know at the time,  what N. told P. & what this was all about. But Nico wasn’t going to disappear forever. He’ll come back! I just didn’t know about it and something will go wrong, but he won’t tell me until months later, when we actually meet again.

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#ts4 #sims 4 #sims 4 story #my rl with my simself #simself #myrlgameplay #18+ content #cw addiction #cw break-up

[aleksa-sims]

My RL gameplay (18+)

I went to Sonja to tell her I wanted to go home. She was a bit disappointed. And I think Sonja likes N.?😄 But that’s totally okay with me & this isn’t the first time! Sonja kind of liked all the guys I dated. 🤷‍♀️

Before I left I wanted to ask Sonja one or two more questions about her partner Daniel. I just had a bad feeling about him.😕

Me: I think I’m going slowly....😬

Sonja: Agh no, A.!😩......😈You just want to get home so you can go to bed with your hot boyfriend 😉

Me: Wow! 😧 You seem to be obsessed with him. If Nico wasn’t my boyfriend, it would be the same, as it was with that one guy D. our ex.🤦‍♀️🤣

Sonja: Nico is even better! I think he knows exactly what he has to do with you to get everything from you A.!🤨....🤭😄

Me: If only you knew !🤨 ..... You wouldn’t get along with him! Heee...is a bit.....crazy! 🤨🤫 You know?

Sonja: But that sounds exciting.😏 I mean if he’s so hard to .....handle for you, you wouldn’t be with him.

Me: You have NO idea!🤨... I often feel like I’m just not.... good enough for him.. But right now, things are going well with us. 

Sonja: OK, so that's good, right?...But why do you think you’re not good enough for him? I’ve seen both of you now and...he can’t keep his hands off you.🤨 And he wants you to be around him all the time. So Idk why you think that? 🙁

Me: Yeah....Idk, if this is the right time to tell you what’s going on with him & me. I’ll tell you next time!...I want to know from you, Sonja. Are you really happy with Daniel?

Sonja: He’s just very stressed out right now. He has so much to do. But everything else is great!

Me: So you think it’s okay that you have to take care of everything here on your own?

Sonja: Actually, you are right! But this is not a real challenge for me! And it won’t last forever that way.

Me: I hope so much that I’m wrong Sonja! But my feeling is that he’s not just staying away from home for so long because of his job. 😕 😠 Sonja: Hm 🤔..... You know, he was in love with someone else when I met him, they were separated and he chose me and he loves me too. He wants this to work with us and our son.

Me: 😠 I wouldn’t trust Daniel if I were you. And if Nico did something like that, I would leave him immediately! I don’t want to spend my whole life wondering if he’s meeting someone else when he’s not there.😠😩

Sonja: I know you are very sensitive to this subject, but sometimes you have to forgive A.! And once you have a child, everything changes!

Me: I just couldn’t live with this thing, even if I wanted to.  And you shouldn’t either! You deserve someone who only has eyes for you! And you could do this all without him! You have family, you’re not alone. And it’s also not good for Alex if you fight all the time, which reminds me of my mom and dad when I was a kid. But you know this shit! You were there so many times when Ana & I cried.

Sonja: I have decided for this and him A.! And I will manage that! I’m not gonna let my family get ruined! My son needs his dad! And just wait, everything will change soon, and if it doesn’t work..., I’ll kick his ass out of here!!!😠

And yes, she will kick him out soon! 🤨But that was a good thing! That’s how he realized, that he can’t play games with Sonja.  

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#ts4 #sims 4 #sims 4 story #my rl with my simself #simself #myrlgameplay #18+ content #tw addiction #tw violence