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stupidityismyjobsecurity · 4 years

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Are we still doing pocket dumps? Because it’s laundry day and this is everything in my work stuff.

1.) Pens, three in left front pocket, two in left sleeve: I carry a blue and red pen to sign things because colored ink can’t be photocopied and passed off as an original. Two of the black pens are for myself taking notes, and the final cheap black pen is for patients to use. They never touch my good pens.

2.) Stethoscope, left cargo pocket: Littmann Classic III with pediatric back instead of bell back. Never carry your stethoscope around your neck. Leave that for nurses who don’t have to worry about getting attacked by their patients. I never got the cardiology because the Classic hits that perfect balance of quality and affordible for me. I always keep a spare roll or two of transpore tape on my stethoscope as well

3.) ID Badge, left external small cargo pocket: For when you get a call at 3 AM and can’t remember your own name.

4.) Cigar cutter and matches, microphone pockets on job shirt: I really don’t smoke cigars all that often, but I’ve been doing this a while now and I’ve found that a quiet cigar behind the station is the best way to come down after a shitty call. I keep them in the Mic pockets of my job shirt because they fit perfectly and who ever actually uses those for Microphones anyway?

5.) Tubex® injector for pre-filled syrettes, right external cargo pocket: These things are a dying breed. They’ve mostly been replaced with the cheap clear plastic ones but I’ve managed to snag one of these and I hold on to it for dear life.

6.) Permanent marker, right external cargo pocket: For those things you must write on when pen won’t work e.g. saline bags, tournaquets, patients’ foreheads.

7.) Fob and Accountability tags, appendix pocket: These go into my appendix pocket and only come out when I wash my pants. I can activate door readers just by hip-checking them and the accountability tags are only for large-scale disasters

8.) Gloves, right job shirt pocket: Whenever I see thin blue or purple gloves at a hospital, I grab them. The gloves on our rigs are thick and great for not tearing, but these thin ones work great for those tricky IVs.

9.) Notepad, left external cargo pocket: Rite in the Rain makes an awesome EMS notebook. It has spots for all the info you’d need, and the pages are actually waterproof. Can’t recommend it enough.

10.) Shove knife/bypass plastics, right cargo pocket: These are useful for getting into locked apartments and such when whomever called 911 is alone and can’t get to the door. Pretty useless against deadbolts but I’ve yet to come across a residental door I couldn’t get through.

11.) Lighter, right cargo pocket: Honestly don’t know why I started carrying this, but I keep carrying it because a lot of coworkers smoke and get their lighters stolen or lost.

12.) Penlight, right external cargo pocket: One step up from the bottom on Amazon will get you this anodized aluminum LED penlight. Works great, doesn’t die on you unexpectedly, and is just bright enough that you can use it as an actual flashlight in a pinch.

13.) Car Keys, right pocket: I really have no use for these in my work pants, but I never got comfortable with not having them on me. They stay in my right pocket, where they would be in my civvies, which turns that pocket into my junk pocket for non-biohazard junk. Usually gets emptied at the end of my shift when I reach into my pocket for my keys and find a bunch of crap.

14.) Trauma Shears, right external cargo pocket: Leatherman Raptor trauma shears. Very good quality shears, if a little pricy. I got these as a gift and after using them I’d say they’re worth shelling out the coin for a pair. Really solid construction, feel like they can cut through anything.

15.) Knife, right external cargo pocket: This is a $20 or $30 wonder that is so old I don’t even remember where I got it. It holds an edge and I’ve been able to patch it back together when it’s broken. The one time I’ve used the glassbreaker on this thing I got a shard embedded into my knuckle.

16.) Belt: Blackhawk! Riggers belt with D-ring. This is another gift, this one from my dad. Great belt, solid and bomb-proof, but I probably wouldn’t pay for one myself. It’s a pretty penny to shell out just to look Tactical®

17.) Cigars, job shirt breast pocket: I usually carry the smallest size of arturo fuentes that I can find. I get more use out of several small cigars and I’m less pissed off if we get a call in the middle of one and I have to scrap it.

18.) Protocol book, left back pocket: For when you get a call at 3 AM and can’t remember your own name.

19.) Breath mints, left job shirt pocket: For when you get a call first thing in the morning or right after a cigar.

20.) Wallet, back right pocket: I actually made this wallet out of the inner jacket of an 1.75” firehose. It turned out really well, and I may actually do a post just specifically about it.

21.) Watch, worn on inside of right wrist: Ok, I fucking love this thing. It’s an Isobrite 422 I think and it is everything I’ve wanted in a watch. Carbon-fiber reinforced polycarbonate body, sapphire crystal, swiss movement, water-resistant to 200 meters, and tritium illumination so it’s always glowing, even without being primed with light. The other thing I love about it is the rotating bezel, which has a color offset at the 15 minute/second mark, making it really useful for counting IV drips or vitals. I wear it on the inside of my right wrist even though I’m right-handed, which is a little weird but just what feels most comfortable to me.

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