#and also looking at photos of hoatzins

[unbidden-yidden]

Y'ALL. My brain just gifted me the most absurd dream, to the point that I was woken up by my concerned spouse at 5:30 a.m. because I was apparently sob-laughing in my sleep and he thought I was crying. I mean. I kind of was, until the merciful hand of wakefulness cut off the dream.

So in the dream, I was reading this nature book that I've had since my childhood. It's a huge coffee table book with glossy pictures of different species of animals that's just called Animal.

I am looking at the section for ungulates, and I turn the page. When I turn the page I realize that someone has made an AI version of it, because it stops making sense and starts devolving from animal facts to "animal facts-i-just-made-up." Now, whoever did this crossed it with one of my favorite halacha podcasts, so I hear the voice of Rabbi A (this dream was so batshit that I am not going to name names publicly; you'll see why in a min) talking crisply in her radio/podcast voice about hippopotamuses and clearly the page I'm reading is her script. Rabbi B is making his thoughtful listening sounds. Then abruptly she says:

"And now we're going to talk about hoatzins. [Cut to a photo like this:

"They look like a narrow chicken and--" [she loudly begins honk-blowing her nose for a comically long time into the microphone]

Rabbi B: [still in his normal radio voice] You didn't need to do that.

Rabbi A: [also still in her normal radio voice] Yes I did! And [dramatic AI approximation of farting sounds that sound like no human fart in existence]

[Sounds end]

[Both rabbis chanting softly together; meanwhile keep in mind I'm reading this like a script on the page] farten. farten. farten. farten. farten. farten. farten. farten. farten... Hippopotamus.

-ending music plays-

*cut to: me laughing so hard I wake my spouse up and he wakes me up*

GUYS WHAT THE FUCK. WHY.

(Seriously I have not listened to this podcast or looked at that book in so long and I hate AI. WTF)

#this was so dumb that I had to share it #if I had to experience this at 5:00 a.m. you have to see it too

[travellingdragon]

I love the idea of bird-like demon!Nikolai that @saintprivateer put in my head! So I tried out a few different designs - the first one is just vaguely bird-like, the second was inspired by a hoatzin and the third one by an eagle - and then a more volcra-like demon!Nikolai in mid-transformation.

#i had so much fun drawing these! #and also looking at photos of hoatzins #they look like they are halfway stuck between an archaeopteryx and a chicken #and they have claws on their wings as chicks #that's so neat #man i love them #grishaverse #nikolai lantsov #king of scars #kos #kos fanart #grishaverse fanart #rule of wolves #my art #art #fanart

[themonsterblogofmonsters]

Borage’s Cursebird

Native to Brazil and cousin to the Canticular and Variegated Cursebirds, Borage’s Cursebirds were first formally identified by Libatius Borage during his initial research into varying Potions recipes based on local ingredients. The feathers of Borage’s Cursebirds, he found, could be acceptable alternatives for Fwooper feathers in a number of brews, while their eggs are acceptable alternatives in potions to those of Grindylows. Of all Cursebirds, Borage’s look the most prehistoric, with young birds lacking full wings and instead having alar thumbs to climb with, as hoatzin birds do. Borage’s are also known to be the most actively dangerous of the Cursebirds, being highly territorial.

Generally, Borage’s Cursebirds are seen only scattered in the forests around Castelobruxo, and are more common in deeper rainforest. Highly territorial, they dislike any but themselves and their flocks casting magic in the territory staked as theirs, and will use their curse - a small thing that starts seeming as though one’s skin is too tight and gradually heightening over time or with additional applications until it feels as though one’s skin is peeling off - to discourage it. As with all Cursebird curses, a simple Finite is not sufficient to remove it, as it is not entirely a spell so much as magic powered by intent, with no word or wand to guide it. Instead, one must use similar counter-charms and dispelling spells as are used to undo Accidental Magic.

Angry Epidexipteryx photo by JELSIN

(I hate that I have to include this but PLEASE DO NOT DELETE THE IMAGE SOURCE OR MY CAPTION.) 

#Borage's Cursebird #Borages Cursebird #Magical Birds #Magical Beasts #Brazil #South America

[rjzimmerman]

Some weird shit in this article. Here, I pick on three of these creatures and post the photo and the story. Click/tap on the caption to learn about the rest.

Nautilus

The nautilus represents the only living member of the subclass Nautiloidea. The nautiluses are cephalopods that retain an outer shell unlike other distantly related animals such as squid and octopus.

Their beautiful shells have inspired many artists over the centuries, and they are also among the finest natural examples of a logarithmic spiral or the golden ratio.

Because of their shells, the fossils of nautiluses are easier to come by than remains of other cephalopods, and fossil hunters have discovered ancient shells dating back at least 500 million years.

Purple frog

Discovered as recently as 2003, this living fossil has been described by researchers as a "bloated doughnut with stubby legs and a pointy snout." Looking at this portly purple creature, it's hard to disagree with that assessment. Even more bizarre, its cry sounds like that of a chicken.

Though found in India, its closest living relatives can only be found on the Seychelles islands, meaning these frogs have been around for at least 100 million years, when India, Madagascar and Seychelles were connected as a single land mass.

Hoatzin

These odd-looking, pheasant-sized birds are arguably the most debated living birds because their evolutionary tree is missing so many branches.

It is the only member of its family (Opisthocomidae), though some taxonomists also place them in their own order. They retain some characteristics that are not found in any other birds. For instance, as chicks they still retain claws on the ends of their wings, which aid them in climbing and clinging to trees.

Regardless of how they fit into the evolutionary picture, they are stunning ancient animals.

#wildlife

[markshepherdjournal]

Photo by @markshepherdphd. Looking like it recently evolved from dinosaurs, this hoatzin (Opisthocomus hoazin) was easy to find in the trees, because it made a lot of noise as it moved along the branches. It is not the most nimble of birds, nor does it sing sweetly in wind. The hoatzin is also referred to as the stinkbird, because of the strong odors it gives off. The bird has an enlarged crop that allows it to ferment leaves and fruit that it eats. Somewhat like ruminants can digest grass for food. And that is where the odors come from. What is more interesting about the hoatzin, however, is that no one has yet been able to identify which bird species to which it is most closely related. But wait, there is something even more odd!. The chicks have clawed hands on the wings, which they can use to climb along branches. That definitely makes it look more dinosaur like. If you travel to South America, they are fairly common and widespread in the Amazon, so you should be able to see on of these very odd, and interesting birds. Visit marksheherdjournal.com #biodiversity #tambopata #tambopataecolodge #rainforest #amazonrainforest #amazonbiotope #audubon (at Tambopata, Madre De Dios, Peru)

#tambopata #biodiversity #amazonrainforest #rainforest #amazonbiotope #tambopataecolodge #audubon