YOU â âNo. There is still a chance.â
DOLORES DEI â âYou think so?â Her voice is weary.
EMPATHY â Everything about her is weary. She is the Innocence of weariness, of heroically borne suffering.
CONCEPTUALIZATION â That is the picture you have painted for yourself, at any rate.
YOU â âYou looked back. Thatâs the memory, the moment, that I canât stop returning to. You looked back. I had a chance, for just that momentâŚâ
DOLORES DEI â She meets your eye, gaze still forever cast back over her shoulder. Time stops. The stars are stilled, the ocean silent. There is *nothing* beyond this memory. Nothing at all. All of infinity is contained in this single moment when anything and everything was possible.
âOh, HarryâŚâ She sighs, soft as eiderdown. âWe never had any chance.â
And just like that, the wave of time collapses under its own weight, obliterating everything. This moment was six years ago. She is gone from here. Gone, goneâŚ
PAIN THRESHOLD â You cannot leave. There was nothing outside of this moment, and now there is nothing at all. Itâs all gone. There is no point. Iâm sorry. I canât do this any longer.
VOLITION â Please, donât say thatâŚ
âOkay. Well, fuck me, then.â
âHow would *you* know?! You gave up! You didnât even try!â
âWe *must* have had a chance, at some point⌠Doesnât everyone get a chance, if nothing more?â
âHow could you say thatâŚ?â
DOLORES DEI â âBecause itâs true,â she says, matter-of-fact. âThere is no moment in time that you can turn back to, no branching paths, no infinity. There is only what happened. I looked back⌠and then away.â She closes her eyes, turning her back to you.
âThe moment ended. *We* ended. That is all.â
SHIVERS â A wave crashes against an unseen shore, ocean spray tickling the back of your neck. You shiver, but no one shivers with you. You are alone in this intersection. Why are you here?
âWhy canât *I* end?! Why canât this all just stop? Please, make it stopâŚâ
âEnded? Iâve barely even started! I got a chance to start completely over as somebody new! I donât need you anymore! Youâre just dead weight to me now.â
âNo. That wasnât the real ending. Weâre a part of something so much bigger than this intersection, telling a story that encapsulates all of history! Thereâs *more* to this, it *means* something.â
âThen⌠What am I supposed to do nowâŚ?â
DOLORES DEI â âNo, Harry.â She turns back to you again now, and she looks⌠sad.
âWe were not metaphors. We were people. Our narrative was not intelligently designed. It simply followed the patterns of history, because those are the only patterns we *know.* We tried to create something new, but we failed. There is no narrative reward for our failure, no satisfactory ending. There is only the immutable past and the unknowable future.â
RHETORIC â There is no assurance of what is good or deserved or what may bring relief. There is no assurance of punishment, either. There is no assurance of anything. Not even of a future. I donât know what to say to make this bearable.
VOLITION â Even so⌠As long as you live, *something* is promised. Can you live with that?
I canât, I just canât do this anymoreâŚ
I can. Itâs enough.
I donât know. I just donât know.
I can at least try for a little longerâŚ
VOLITION â Thatâs all I ask. Thatâs enough.
144 notes
¡
View notes