#and Thena is like I am not going to get emotionally involved

[softquietsteadylove]

heyyy 🫶🏼🫶🏼

can we have some more spicy ten things I hate abt you AU?? I really loved the last one!!! And can we also have Thena being vulnerable to Gil? I love your writing so so sooooo much 🫶🏼🫶🏼

—- Eternalfanatic (I forgot my account password lmao) 🫶🏼🫶🏼🫶🏼🫶🏼🫶🏼

"Hey."

Thena furrowed her brows, determined to keep on kissing him as their hips moved together. She tangled her tongue with his, trying to dissuade him from interrupting things.

"Thena?"

She huffed, pulling away and bracing herself on his shoulders to glare at him. "You keep saying how much you enjoy our intimacy, yet you insist on interrupting it!"

Gil wore a sheepish expression, despite literally being buried inside of her. His fingers tapped on her bare back. "I do!"

"Then why," she growled, leaning forward and forcing him completely under her again. Not that she enjoyed the thought of his eyes having a full on feast of her naked body. But she enjoyed being on top--it gave her the control she so desperately needed, especially at times like this. She dug her nails into his shoulder, "are you?"

He sighed, glancing away as if they were having a light, normal conversation, and not in the middle of having sex. "Well...is something on your mind?"

"Now?!" she barked at him. Neither were close to the point of no return, obviously, but she wasn't exactly ready to call things off and have a little heart to heart, either. "You're asking this now!"

"Sorry," he whined faintly, holding her hips still as she tried to resume their pleasure. He gave her a distinctly concerned look. "I'm happy you came over and all. But I dunno--you seem kind of...angry."

She was.

"If you wanna angry fuck, then fine," Gil amended, holding her hips more firmly. "But I'm not some exercise bike you can use to blow off steam and then ignore."

Her brows raised. It was the first time he had expressed his qualms about their relationship so clearly. He had a right to, of course, and she knew he was right, too. She was using all the benefits of their closeness without offering any return on his emotional investment.

Gil made room for her as she lifted herself off of his completely erect hardness and flopped onto the bed beside him. "Y'know how they say 'don't go to bed angry'? Well, I'm pretty sure they would say don't have spite-sex, either."

She shook her head, staring up at his ceiling with her arms wrapped around herself futilely. "Sorry."

He shook his head as well, also staring up instead of at her. It did make things feel a little easier. "I'm sorry--I should have asked before we got into things."

In all fairness to Gil, she had positively pounced on him as soon as they were in his room. He wouldn't have had much time to voice his concerns before she was undoing his belt and asking if that box of condoms still had anything in it.

"So?" he prompted, slipping his hands under the covers and over the tent in his sheets. "What pissed you off?"

At the moment, he was at the very top of that list. But that also wasn't fair, and she knew what he was asking and how he meant it.

They had met at the party, as promised. And things had been fine. Sersi had found Dane immediately and Thena had happily left the young lovebirds to flirt and giggle through the evening. She and Gil were talking, relaxing a little out of the thick of the crowd. It had been fine.

"Ikaris," she began. Part of her almost wished the solitary statement would have been enough, but she knew it wasn't. She tugged his sheets up more firmly around her. "When I went to find the recycling."

Which there wasn't one, much to her frustration.

Gil nodded, both of them still flat on their backs. "What did he say?"

Thena gulped. Looking up at the white painted ceiling of Gil's room was easier. The spots hastily plastering over something exposed, the edge where ceiling met the brick walls. "He asked me what we were."

"Oh."

She sighed through her nose. She hadn't had much intention of telling him this. Truly, the desire to tell anyone at all any of this was completely absent. But she owed Gil this much. "I told him to fuck off and mind his own business."

Gil snorted.

But the story wasn't nearly so simple. "But he guessed we were together in at least some capacity. He asked...he asked if I was finally ready to get off my high horse and just fuck--in his own words."

Gil sat up partially, his face drawing in and suddenly radiating a righteous indignity on her behalf.

She reached over, pressing on his chest and making him resume looking up at the ceiling with her. It was the only way she was going to get through this.

"His pursuit of me...he did earnestly try to date me. At least, I thought it had been earnest," she dragged out of herself. It was her least favourite thing to remember of all her life, it wasn't coming out easy. "He had wanted to advance rather quickly. I told him I hadn't done anything with anyone and I doubted I was ready for it with him."

Gil waited through her heavy pause.

She sighed, "he laughed, and laughed, and laughed."

"I'll kill him."

She shrugged, "even that would be more attention than he deserves to be paid. I sent him away and he's thought derisively of me ever since. That's why my contempt for him runs deeper than simply him being a prick, and him thinking he has some right to my sister."

"Wow," Gil scoffed, his voice dripping with disdain, "I thought he was a creep but I didn't know he was a disgusting bastard."

Thena inhaled slowly, running her hands over the sheets. "Sersi doesn't even know. I've only told her that she is not to even so much as speak to him."

Gil had the wisdom not to offer his opinion on things, as least just yet. But he reached over under the sheets until he could grasp her hand.

She let him. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay."

She shook her head again, her hair a hopeless mess on Gil's pillow (and he only had one, so of course he saved it for her). "It's not fair to you."

He sat up, apparently - unfortunately - done with the anonymity of avoiding eye contact. He leaned on his knees, "I guess not."

She had been the one to state it, but his quick and firm agreement still made her stomach clench. "I-"

"But it's not fair to you either."

"Hm?" she blinked up at him. She expected some lecture but he leaned down again, stretching his body out against hers and scooping her waist into the grasp of his strong arm. She sighed as he kissed her.

"I hope I don't have to tell you I'm not like that asshole."

No, he didn't.

He pulled away, looking at her so tenderly that she wondered how she could ever muster the effort to be cold with him. "But I shouldn't have to tell you. You should just...feel it, or something."

He had his own eloquence, and she found it unwittingly charming.

"Thena," Gil frowned, holding her against him, both of them on their sides. "Were you ready--when you first came over, I mean? 'Cause if you weren't, I can't-"

She leaned in, kissing him again to divert the trajectory of that thought. "I came over, I initiated the kiss, I told you I was ready. Is that not enough?"

But he didn't rise to her bait. He stared at her like he would never see her again if he blinked. "I...I...I really like you, Thena."

It certainly wasn't what he had initially started saying, but it still made her freeze like a deer in headlights. Excitement and dread flooded through her in equal amounts.

"I'm not asking you to feel the same," he whispered, and she had to admire that he was strong enough to say that, while she was too afraid to even tell him she liked him in the first place. "But I'd rather you know. And it has nothing to do with, uh, this. I liked you before. I liked you as soon as I saw you glaring at me at the theatre beside Sersi."

She rolled her eyes, because there was no way that was true.

"So, even if you don't wanna hang out anymore, or come over like this," Gil trailed off into a mumble, his eyes drifting downward. "Then, that's okay. But I'll still like you--unless you tell me not to, I guess."

She smiled--even laughed. There was just something so earnest and sweet and charming about this delinquent. She kissed him again, just for the enjoyment of it. It was actually rather dangerous, how much she liked kissing him.

Gil laid his head down again. She really needed to get him another pillow (such a boy thing, to have only one). "Sorry, but I guess I'm glad I interrupted."

She supposed it was out of concern for her. Although there was still a faint ache within her, and the insides of her thighs were quite sticky. "Was angry sex so bad?"

He grinned, satisfied that she seemed in better spirits. He ran his hands over her back again, "not that it's bad. But I prefer making love."

Thena let him lure her into making out again. It was a great excuse not to look at him as he expounded such romantic nonsense. "I've never met a boy who called it that."

"Well, I'd call myself a young man, at best," he protested with a faint pout (before kissing her again). "And I think it's only fitting, if I'm gonna worship you like the princess you are."

She didn't have a clever comeback for that, gasping as he latched onto her neck. "Do you still have that condom on?"

"Yeah, but let me do something."

She half expected him to pick up the firm and nearly frenzied pace she'd had before. To roll them over and start absolutely ravaging her. But all he did was move her onto her back and lie himself over her. He stayed close, his head always hovering within kissing distance.

"This okay?" he whispered as he pushed into her again, much more slowly and gently this time. "If I wanna get romantic with the girl I like?"

It was so juvenile, so trivial sounding. And yet when he said it, her heart and her brain screamed in joy. She never felt so elated, despite her fighting against this very thing.

"Gil," she gasped, her hands on his chest as he thrusted slowly but steadily. They had actually never been in this specific position before. It felt intimate, even fore the act of physical relations. Her legs splayed out on either side of him, but her foot was pressed to his calf muscle, as if scared he would slither away from her. Her hands were on his warm skin, she could feel his rapid heartbeat.

"Thena," he moaned as he picked up speed.

Looking into his eyes was too much. She didn't know where he ended and she began. She was being too vocal and the longer she looked into his eyes the more red spread through her cheeks and down her neck. She clung to him. "Fuck, Gil."

"Thena," he groaned again, panting and grunting and meeting her lips in hasty, open kisses.

"Gil, please," she whimpered, her voice thin and high like the last note on a violin. She didn't want to, but she slung to him desperately. "Please, please come with me."

"I'm there, I'm so there," he confirmed. Neither of them had the stamina of seasoned experts, but she felt so much more acutely than usual every movement and breath he took.

Making unfathomable sounds while rutting her naked body together with a boy she liked: she was no princess. She was just Thena, and she was unfortunately quite in love with the boy in bed with her.

And the boy was quite a fine man, she purred as she felt him come first, within the condom, his muscles twitching as he held himself over her. He stayed close but made an effort not to put his full weight on her.

She accepted it eagerly, lifting her hips as she came around him. Her thighs gripped either sides of him, soft flesh to soft flesh. She had no control over her body, or her voice, although he helped absorb some of the sounds of her ecstasy directly against his waiting lips.

They laid like that, both catching their breath. Gil moved first, but her legs tightened around him, unwilling to part with him just yet, even in his softened state.

"You feel good?" he asked aloud (needlessly). He kissed her cheek.

"Hm," she purred, still languishing in the feeling of his skin against hers. She ran her hands over the sheen on his skin and the hair there, fine as it was. "Don't make me move yet."

"Okay," he chuckled, kissing her forehead and only moving enough to lie himself down not quite on top of her. "Whatever her ladyship wants."

It was a teasing nickname, but she didn't even have it in her to scold him for it.

"Does this mean you'll stay?" he whispered, the light touch of his fingertips on her cheek tempting her deeper into sleep.

"Hm, I shouldn't," she sighed, curling against him on her side, even as her energy left her. That was all she got out on the matter. It was simply too tempting to remain all snuggled up with him. He certainly had no complaints, even as she felt him moving around to clean up or some such.

If he wanted to be her boyfriend, then he could be her boyfriend. And that meant letting her sleep as long as she wanted.

#Thenamesh 10 Things AU #I'm so glad to see you!!!! #we've all forgotten a password or two before #Thenamesh 18+ #these two!!! #poor Gil he's so head over heels for this girl #and Thena is like I am not going to get emotionally involved #Thena said I'm in my friends with benefits era #also Thena: thinks about him constantly day and night #This is somewhat from the movie but I also did want to further explore Thena's hate for Ikaris #this feels like something he'd do #so when she finally gets together with Gil she's like careful #now that he has what he's after if you get involved it's all downhill from here #meanwhile Gil: what if I ask her to marry me at graduation? #Karun upstairs has the tv on and is cooking in the kitchen #he's just glad Gil has come out of his shell a little #he still wants to meet Thena #but the poor thing doesn't want to meet Gil's basically dad after a hasty fuck session in his basement #thank you so much for the ask truly #please send more for as long as you want to read them!

[horrible-writer-rain]

Over the Edge and Under

Summary: The 118's actions have devastating consequences.

Pairing: Evan "Buck" Buckley/Male OC!

Warnings: Suicide, Angst, Hurt No Comfort, Depression, Post-lawsuit, Past Abuse in reference to Buck's treatment at the 118

A/N: This is not edited. I wrote this fic at like midnight. I'll post the reactions and aftermath at some point.

He was tired. Tired of the glares and harsh words from the people he called family. Tired of going home to an empty apartment because Luca was overseas on some mission that was classified. Tired of being the man behind when all he wanted was to save people. To do the one thing he was good at. He left a voicemail for Luca and one to both Luca’s twin sister and brother in Texas. His grip is tight on the railing but not from a fear of failing. No, he had resigned himself that he was going to die but only when he’s ready. He hopes Chris will forgive him, but he had written him a letter and had left it on his counter with Carla’s name on it. He knew she would give it to him. Luca would be pissed and heartbroken but he had a good support system in their old team, his family, and his crew in Austin. He had left letters for the crew of the 118 as well. Left them on the counter as well. He had written a letter for every person in his life that he loved. It was up to them if they read it or not.

He lets out a breath when he hears a car stop. “Sir, please step away back over the railing.” He felt like he could cry. He knew that voice. “I’m good right where I am, ‘Thena.” He calls opening his eyes to look down. It was about a 40ft drop into freezing water so if the impact didn’t kill him then the hypothermia and subsequent drowning would. “Buck?” He hears her come closer. “What are you doing here, baby?” She asks and he shrugs. “I’m tired ‘Thena.” He tells her as a firetruck pulls up. “Anyone I can call?” She asks stepping closer and he shakes his head. “Stay where you are ‘Thena.” He warns and she stops moving. “Just you Bobby. Keep the others back.” He hears her speak into her radio. The 118 must have responded. Fuck. It was bad enough that he was going to jump in front of Athena but now his crew. The ones who have thrown insults and petty jabs his way. The ones who had a hand in causing this. His grip loosens and Athena lets out a strangled noise. “It’s Okay, ‘Thena.” He tries to reassure her.

“Why’d you have the rest of the crew stay back, Athena?” He hears Bobby, no captain Nash say his tone weary. He knows exactly when Captain Nash spots him. His breath audibly hitching. “Buck?” The use of his nickname and the concern in his voice has him letting out a harsh laugh. “It’s Buck now, is it?” He says finally turning around to face him. “Buck, you don’t have to do this.” He says stepping closer, but Athena holds her arm out. “Why should I listen to you? You’ve done nothing but belittle me since I got back. This isn’t your house, so I don’t have to follow your rules.” His voice is calm, and he looks over to where Hen, Chim, and Eddie have gotten out of the truck. He can see the horror in Hen’s eyes, and he feels kind of bad. She was the one who he confided in the most about being away from Luca. They had eventually bonded over their similar sexualities and marriages to people of the same sex.

“Eddie get me a harness.” Captain Nash says and he sees Eddie falter for a second before following the order. Chim stands beside Hen watching with wide eyes. No doubt trying to figure out how to explain what happened to Maddie. Hen is gripping her med bag tightly. “Think about the people that love you, Buck. Think about your family.” Captain Nash says and he turns his gaze once more to his captain. “My family consists of Luca Rizzoli and his family.” He says and Captain Nash shakes his head. “You’ve got us Buck.” Eddie says as he hands over the harness to his captain. He lets out another humorless laugh. “I’ve not had you since the bombing. I thought you were my best friend. But friends don’t call each other exhausting or shove them around. Family doesn’t belittle anything that’s ever happened to a member of said family.” Eddie looks guilty at his words. “Captain Nash, I used to think of you as a father figure. Now, I see that your no better than my own damn father who didn’t give a single shit about me. In a way this is your fault. You chose to lie to me about what happened. So the only way I saw to get back to my family was to fight for it. I turned down 7 million dollars to get back to my family. It was never even about the money. I just wanted you back.” He pauses to take a breath before continuing. “I knew it wasn’t going to be easy and I accepted that you all would be mad at me. I just didn’t expect for it to last a few months and involve being assaulted. You chose to leave me as the man behind. At first, I was fine with it. I knew you didn’t trust me. I figured I’d need to earn your trust back, but you never gave me the chance. Then after awhile it just started to hurt. You had taken away my ability to help people in a way I loved. I wasn’t being shot at or have the threat of getting blown up and I wasn’t in some active warzone halfway across the world.” Captain Nash had put on the harness as he was talking but never took his eyes of him.

“Please, let us make this right.” Captain Nash pleads with him, but he shakes his head resolved to do what he had come here for. “Think of Christopher. That kid loves you like you’re his father too. Think of what it will do to him if you die.” Eddie says. “That’s a low blow, Eddie. I did think of him. All the time. I wondered if he had nightmares from the tsunami. Wondered if there was any way I could help him, but you kept me away.” He seethes but his voice is still level. “I’m sick and tired of thinking of and putting other’s before myself. Call me selfish but I just don’t give a shit anymore. I’m tired of being other people’s punching back both physically and emotionally. I’m done.” He sees Hen and Chim start moving toward him. “I’m sorry but I just am.” With those final words he pushes himself away from the railing letting go.

The air is cool against his skin as he falls closing his eyes a thinking of his husband. He can hear the screams of the people he once called family, but the sound disappears as soon as he hits the water and his world fades to black.

The 118 stand shocked as their youngest member just jumped of the bridge. Henrietta Wilson falls to her knees as a broken wail leaves her. Her partner Howard Han stands in total shock trying to make himself believe that the man he considered as a brother has just ended his life. Edmundo Diaz has crumpled to his knees as well sobs leaving him as the reality of what he had done had cost him his best friend and the man his son considers as a second father. Athena Grant stands with her hand over her mouth and tears streaming down her face. It was like May’s overdose all over again but this time she wouldn’t be saving her child. Robert Nash is half leaning over the railing with his arm outstretched for the man that had become like a son to him. Guilt consumed each member of the 118 from their actions in the last few months. Athena’s guilt coming from her failure to save her boy. Each of them wondering how they were going to tell their family and how they were going to tell them it was their fault. How it was their actions that drove him to take his own life. “Get water and rescue down here to search the waters. I want his body recovered.” Captain Nash’s voice is void of any emotion as he gives the command. It prompts the others into action but a cloud now hung over them and its their own fault.

#911 fox #9 1 1 lone star #post lawsuit #post tsunami #post bombing #post embolism