#also ur welcome to make me starters :^) if u dont want to wait on me
Note
Hii ok u dont have to write this if it doesnt inspire u but I’ve been watching Selling Sunset on Netflix & I’ve been waiting impatiently for the 3rd season cuz it’s just so good lol but i was wondering if u could write something about rich real estate agent H? Maybe helping the MC buy her first home and they hit it off? Ur the only 1 who writes these diverse Harry’s & I can’t stop thinking about real estate H showing her expensive houses & like doing NaughtyStuff with her in an empty 1 lol xx HC
a/n: this has been in my inbox for a while and I’ve been wanting to get to it, so here it is! there is smut, but it’s more tame than you requested. Hope you still like it!
Sold
You weren’t sure how you were able to do it, but you finally had enough money for a down payment on a home. You scrimped and saved for years as best you could, you paid off the majority of your student loans, you built up your credit, and now you felt ready for this very adult step.
Your parents weren’t sure why you weren’t content with just renting. “What if you meet someone?” They’d ask you. “Then they could just move in with me, or we’d find another place. It’s an investment!” You’d reply. They had this vision in their head that you’re supposed to buy a home with a partner. It was the twenty-first century, you didn’t need anyone to help you...or so you thought.
The pre-approval process at the bank was lengthy, but thorough. They’d need to see your W2′s from two years prior, they needed to know how long you’ve been at your current job, and basically just how much money you had altogether. The mortgage specialist at the bank was very kind.
“So, you’re doing this all on your own?”
“I am.” You smile.
“Have you got real estate agent yet?”
“No.” You shrug. “You don’t really need when you’re the one buying do you? I can just call whoever’s showing the house and work with them.”
“Maybe in small towns, but in larger areas like this you’ll want a realtor, trust me. It doesn’t cost you anything either way. They can top shop, help you negotiate, all those kinds of things.”
“They also like to show you houses out of your price range.” You scoff.
“Not the honest ones. I get it, at the end of the day, they’re out there to make a quick buck, and the more the house is, the larger the cut they get. But I know a guy, he actually helped my son buy his first home. He was absolutely wonderful, and he’s a shark.” She goes through the many business cards on her desk. “Ah! Here it is, Harry Styles, he works for Greenfield Real Estate.”
You take the card from her and scan it over.
“Don’t they sell, like, really nice homes? They work with people looking for mansions.”
“Just give him a call, and tell him I sent you. You won’t regret it, trust me. Your pre-approval is only good for ninety days, so you’ll want to contact him soon.”
//
Your head was swimming, but you knew she had a point. Half the houses you favorited on realtor.com or zillow were sold already. It was a seller’s market for sure. Maybe you would need someone to help you negotiate...but did it have to be a man? Couldn’t you find a female realtor? You spent years becoming the strong, independent woman you came to be, and now it felt like you’d be surrendering to some stereotype.
However, after perusing on the Greenfield website, you see a picture of Harry. You bite your bottom lip, swallow some pride, and dial his number.
“Greenfield Real Estate, this is Harry.” You weren’t expecting the British accent, or the deep voice and drawl that came with it. “Hello?”
“Um, hi! Yeah, Doris at Hills Bank gave me your card...I’m a first time home buyer.” You want to smack yourself for how stupid you sound.
“Oh, I love Doris! I’ve worked with her a bunch. I actually helped her son buy his first home last year.”
“That’s what she told me.”
“Right, so, picking a realtor is sort of like dating, you wanna make sure you pick the right one. Why don’t we meet up for coffee somewhere locally so we can get to know each other a bit.”
Pushy, he was already wanting to meet you. Probably to have you sign your life away to be his client.
“Sure, we could do that.”
“Are you local? There’s a place on Bleaker Street that has great coffee.”
“Is it Monte Alto?”
“Yeah! That’s the one. When are you free?”
“I could meet you Friday during lunch my break.”
“Sounds great, I’m assuming noon?”
“Correct.”
“By the way, you didn’t tell me your name.”
“It’s Y/N.”
“Alright, Y/N, I’ll see you Friday at noon at Monte Alto.”
You take a huge breath after you hang up.
//
Friday rolled around, and you weren’t able to step out of the office until nearly 11:50. It would take a little more than ten minutes to get there, and you hated being late. You were happy you had at least looked up what Harry looked like so you’d be able to spot him once you were there.
Once you’re there, you see a man sitting on one of the cushioned chairs, looking out the window. It had to be him.
“Harry?”
He looks over at you and smiles. He stands up to shake your hand.
“Y/N?”
“Yes, hi, sorry I’m late, I’ve had meeting after meeting this morning. Fridays aren’t usually this busy.”
“No worries at all. Tell me, what’s your order?”
“Oh, I can get it myself. I’m gonna grab a bagel too.”
“Good idea, I’ll do the same. Now, what’ll you have?”
“Really...I can-”
“I know you can, but I invited you here, it would be rude to have you pay. Do this with all my perspective clients.”
“Well, don’t I feel special.” You say sarcastically. He chuckles softly as you both get in line.
You both order your drinks and food, and wait awkwardly for your names to be called, then you sit back down.
“Thank you.”
“You’re more than welcome. So, tell me, what’s your dream home?”
“Oh god, um, nice big kitchen, I love to cook when I actually have time. A room for entertaining. I’m usually the one to host friends. Two stories, a garage, three bedrooms would be ideal, but I’ll settle for two-”
“No settling.” He smirks. “Go on.”
“Um...well, so, three bedrooms, ideally I’d like a master with an en suite, but who doesn’t?” You watch as he makes notes on a little pad of paper. “I’d like a yard, but it doesn’t need to be huge. Bonus points if there’s a deck or patio, maybe even a pool, but I can live without those things.”
“And you’re buying this just for yourself, correct? No husbands or boyfriends I need to know about?”
“You know, I could have a girlfriend.”
“Shit, I’m sorry you’re right, um-”
“Relax, I’m teasing.” You chuckle. “But to answer your question, I am doing this alone. I feel like I’m ready for a house, so I want one.”
“Thought I put my foot in my mouth for a second there. I need to learn to just say partner.” He picks up his drink to take a sip, and that’s when you notice he has perfectly manicured nails. Interesting. “So it seems like you know how to be realistic about what you want, and you also have a dream list. What about projects, do they scare you?”
“I’m good with painting or even having to put new flooring in, but I’d like to stay away from any major reno.”
“Gotcha.” He makes another note. “And what price range are we working with here?”
“Let me just make a note on my phone, I’d rather not say out loud in case someone tries to rob me.”
He smiles and nods. He squints at your screen and makes a note.
“Great, good for you. What do you do for work?”
“I’m a physician, I work at a doctor’s office not too far from here. I’ve been there for two years, and I love what I do.”
“That’s great. So, Doris talked with you about balancing a mortgage and paying down your student loans?”
“They’re mostly paid for, actually. I got a lot of scholarships for my undergrad, and during med school I was awarded a pretty decent grant.”
“Perfect.” He scribbles some more notes and then puts his pad and pen down. “What do you want to know about me?”
“How long have you been a realtor for?”
“Six years, been with Greenfield since I started.”
“What made you get into it?”
“Love seeing people happy.”
“What about when someone buys below the asking price?”
“Doesn’t happen with me, not when I’m selling anyways. However, when I’m helping someone buy a home, well, let’s just say I’m pretty good at negotiating.” He smirks. “You’d be in good hands with me, but if you wanna shop around some more I’ll understand.”
“Do you work with first time buyers a lot?”
“Sometimes, it depends. I know a lot of them like to work with me. They’re usually young, I’m young. Makes for a more relatable experience.”
“Okay.” You look outside and think for a moment. “I think I’d like to work with you.”
He smiles big at you.
“Are there any homes you’ve had in mind that you’d like to start looking at? I can definitely see what open houses are out there too. People tend to make offers fast, but don’t let that scare you. The home has to feel right, if you want it, I’ll make sure you get it.”
“There were a few I’ve seen on realtor...” You take your phone out to show him. “I’d like to not have a super long commute either if I can help it.”
“Are you looking to grow into this home or is it more of a starter space for you?” You give him a funny look. “I just mean, like, would you be open to a condo or something like that.”
“Only if it was detached and didn’t have a high HOA.”
He nods and looks at some of the other homes you had favorited.
“So what I’m gonna do is go back to my office and run a few searched. Then I’ll text you a link to the home I find, and you can tell me which ones you like. Don’t be afraid to tell me you hate them either. Then if there’s a couple you wanna see, we’ll set up a time that works for you, and then I’ll contact the other realtor, sound good?”
“Sounds great.”
You shake hands again before leaving. As you make your way back to the office, you feel relieved. You had someone you could ask questions to, and someone basically on your side. Harry was nice, a salesman at heart, but nice.
//
Saturday morning you get a text from Harry.
Harry Styles - Hi Y/N, it was great meeting you yesterday. Here are some places I think you might like. Let me know what you think!
You liked how formal he was. You tap the link he sent you. The first couple were duds, but there were a few on here that actually peaked your interest.
You - Could we three of the home? The bottom three on the list.
Harry Styles - Sure! When would work for you?
You - I don’t work on Mondays, so that would be easiest. Timing doesn’t matter.
Harry Styles - I’ll contact the realtors and see what we can put together.
You - Thanks so much!
You felt really excited. You wondered if maybe you should invite your parents to come look at the houses with you, but maybe you would save that for a second look through once you actually find something. A house can look much different in pictures than it does in person.
//
Monday morning, around 9:30, you meet Harry at the first location. His car was parked in the driveway. He gets out when he sees you pull in. He had two coffees in hand.
“Morning.” He says to you. “Got you a coffee, I remembered your order.”
“Oh! Um, thanks.” You take it from him.
“I’ve already gone in and unlocked the doors and turned the lights on. The other realtor isn’t here, which is perfectly fine. Take your time, feel free to walk around outside before heading in too.”
You smile and nod. The front was beautifully landscaped, and there was a gate leading to the backyard. He follows you out that way. You listen as he explains when the home was built and why the people were selling it. There a nice deck that had been recently put on, no pool though, but there was room for one. You go up the stairs of the deck and go in through the sliding glass door.
“Kitchen was recently renovated within the last five years. All appliances come with the place.”
“It’s beautiful.” You run your fingers over the nice granite counter tops.
As you scope out the rest of the house, you’re not as impressed as you were with it when you first walked in. The bedrooms were small, and barely had any storage. The basement wasn’t in the best condition either.
“Definitely a no, but a good first experience nonetheless.”
Harry looks down at his watch as he nods.
“Wanna follow me to the next place then?”
“Sure.”
Same thing happened at house number two and three. You just weren’t wowed. You sigh heavily as you lean against your car.
“Don’t get discouraged, Y/N. It’s better to know what you don’t like. We can keep looking. When I go into the office tomorrow I can run another search. Maybe we can look at some condos.”
“That might be good. Maybe somewhere with people my age? It would be cool to be in a little community.”
“Definitely.”
“Thanks...I hope I haven’t been a pain with the things I don’t like.”
“Not at all. This is a really big purchase, you should get what you want.”
//
It took three more weeks of meeting up with Harry on various days to find a place you liked. On a Saturday evening, he brought you over to a condo that was detached, had a garage, a community gym and pool. It had three bedrooms, and two and a half baths. One being an en suite for the master bedroom.The kitchen was gorgeous and flowed into a dining/living area. You were thrilled.
“Harry...” You look at him. “It’s perfect.”
“Really, you like it?”
“I love it!” You squeal and hug him without thinking. “Sorry.” You blush.
“It’s fine, it’s exciting.”
“I’d like to put an offer in. The price is rate and the HOA is reasonable. It’s not too far from work. I’d be able to entertain, the backyard is fenced in. There was even security at the gate! This is my home, I can feel it.”
“Fantastic. The paperwork can take some time. Would you wanna fill everything out over dinner?”
“Um...sure...”
“Plus, it gives you a chance to see what places nearby are like. We passed some nice restaurants on the way here.”
You follow him to a nice pizza place a couple of miles away. He bring a large packet of paper and a couple of pens in with him.
“On the way here I called the other realtor to let him know an offer was coming their way.”
“Thanks.”
You both get seated and are given some water. He takes the papers out and explains what you would need to sign, and what your offer would mean. Harry said you could definitely low ball the sellers, so you asked for about $15K less than the asking price.
“They probably won’t accept, but most people don’t on the first offer. This just gives us a good starting point.”
“And you think the six grand in closing costs is good?”
“Yeah, totally reasonable. That’ll be about half of it. Sometimes, you can get more money off after the home inspection. Once a price is settled, you’ll want to schedule that right away. I have some names of some great home inspectors.”
“Would you be there for that?”
“I would. I’m there for all of it. The other realtor will be there too.”
“Okay good. I’d feel better with you there.”
As you begin to sign the documents, a waiter comes over.
“Good evening folks, can I start you off with anything to drink?”
“I’d love a glass of rose please.” You say.
“Just a Corona for me, thanks.”
The waiter nods and leaves you be.
“Did you want to just split a pizza?” Harry asks looking down at the menu.
“Sure, what do you like? I usually just get green peppers and mushrooms.”
“Works for me. Would you mind this cauliflower crust?”
“Not at all! I prefer that, actually.”
‘Perfect.” He smiles.
When the waiter comes back, Harry orders your pizza. He watches as you finish up all the paperwork. He checks over everything to make sure you signed everything.
“I’ll get this all scanned and sent over tomorrow.”
“Do you ever take a day off?”
“Yes and no. The realtor world is funny. Sometimes I’m in the office all day and then I wont hear from a client until 8PM. I’m not helping someone buy, I’m helping someone sell. I’m always busy.”
“Sorry to take up your Saturday night...”
“No, don’t be. I’d just be home working.” He shrugs and takes a sip of his beer. “It’s your Saturday night I’m more worried about.”
“Oh please.” You laugh. “My friends know I’ve been busy with this, they understand. Besides when I showed them who you were...” You stop yourself from finishing the sentence.
“No, please, go on.” He smirks.
“They just, they saw your picture on the Greenfield website, that’s all.” You blush.
The waiter comes over with the pizza, and thankfully it breaks a bit of the tension. You each take a slice and dig in.
“This is delicious.” You say.
“Yeah, never been here before, I’ll definitely have to come back.” He takes another sip of his beer. “Once that condo is yours, I fully expect an invite to your house warming, by the way. I like to know my clients are good to go.”
“I definitely won’t be a stranger.”
When you and Harry are done, he walks you out to your car. He gives you a small hug goodbye as well. You felt like you just had a date, but there was no way you did.
//
After going back and forth twice, your offer was accepted. You set up a home inspection with one of the names Harry had given you. He meets you at the house when it’s time, and you’re able to meet the other realtor. A woman, who was a little too delighted to see Harry. You felt jealous when they hugged. However, he stayed close to you and took notes while the inspector was talking.
You made sure to ask a lot of questions. There were no major things that alarmed you. All of the information was just a lot to take in, and you were feeling slightly overwhelmed. You should have brought your parents, or another friend. Was Harry a friend at this point? As the inspector was putting together a full report for you, and getting your email, the other realtor was talking to Harry.
“So, I thought you were only in the selling game right now.” She smirks at him.
“Once in a while I take on a buyer.” He shrugs. “It’s good commission.”
“Yeah, thanks, can’t wait to split it with you.” She rolls her eyes. “But I do love when our paths cross.”
“Mhm.” He looks over at you and then back to the realtor. “The previous owners took great care of this place.”
“Yeah, they did. The only reason they moved is because they’re daughter had a baby and they wanted to be closer to her.”
“Ah, classic.”
“Are you doing anything later?”
“Um…well…Y/N is probably going to have questions and stuff, so I’ll probably be busy with her for a bit.”
“Okay, but, like, tonight, are you free? We could grab a drink.”
“I…”
“Harry?” You say, walking over to them. “Everything’s all set. He said I should have the radon and water tests by next week.”
“Perfect. You’ll be able to make a final decision and add anything to an addendum then.”
“It was nice to meet you.” You shake the woman’s hand.
“Same to you. Look forward to hearing from you soon.”
“Y/N, I took a lot of notes, is there anything you want to go over?”
“Yeah, that would be great.”
“See ya Margaret, we’ll be in touch.” He shakes her hand and leaves her standing there, shocked.
Harry walks with you outside, and you agree on a bar to meet up at. You both grab drinks and Harry goes over his notes with you. He gives you the name of a good plumber since you mentioned you’d want to update a few fixtures.
“What about a painter? Know of anyone that can help with that?”
“You don’t need to waste your money on a professional. Painting’s not that hard.” He chuckles.
“Well, I am not very skilled when it comes to that kind of stuff. Plus, I won’t really have the time to do it myself, and I’d wanna get it done before I move.”
“You could get all done in a couple of weekends no problem, you just need some friends that know how to paint.” He puts a toothpick in his mouth and fiddles with it. “I know how to paint.”
“You do?”
“Sure.” He shrugs. “Sometimes sellers need to fix up their houses quickly. I’ve come to the rescue on more than one occasion.”
“That’s nice of you.”
“I don’t make any money if I don’t. No one wants to be an ugly house.” He takes a sip of his drink. “I guess what I’m saying is, I could help you paint. You’re about to have a mortgage payment on your hands.”
“Pending the inspection report.” You smirk.
“Right.” He smiles.
“Did you offer up the same service for Doris’ son?”
“No.” He says smugly. “He already knew how to paint.”
“That other woman before, what was her name? Margaret?”
“Yeah, what about her?”
“I heard her ask you out…”
“She didn’t, she wasn’t…uh…” He scratches the back of his neck. “Sometimes we go for drinks if we end of working on the same house. Nothing more than that really.”
“So, you’re not, like, seeing her.”
“God, no. That would be a major conflict of interest.”
“Do you always go out for drinks with your clients?”
“Sometimes…I know some people have clients over to their home to do paperwork, but I didn’t think you’d feel super comfortable coming over to some guy’s house you barely know.”
“How considerate of you.” You giggle.
“Did it bother you that she asked me out tonight?”
You nearly choke on your drink.
“What? No, why, uh, why would it have bothered me?”
“Because…if someone had done the same to you in front of me I would have been bothered, but to be fair, I’m a pretty jealous guy.” He finishes his drink and orders another one.
“How many times does this happen?”
“What?”
“You hitting on your clients.”
“Is that what I’m doing?” He fake gasps. “And no, I don’t usually do this. I’m a little embarrassed, actually. Not very professional of me to have a crush on your client.” Your eyes widen and your jaw drops slightly. “Sorry, I hope I’m not making you uncomfortable.”
“No! I…I’m just a little surprised that you’re into me, is all.”
“Why? You’ve got a great career, you’re super independent, and you’re really funny.”
“How do you not already have a girlfriend?”
“I’m really busy, like, all the time. I’m able to take vacations here and there, but you see how much I work. Any time I date it doesn’t last because people don’t understand the job. You’re a doctor, you get it. You must be busy going to classes trying to stay up to date on everything.”
“I am, I’m definitely busy a lot…but I make time for friends.”
“So do I. My friends don’t get offended if I have to cancel or reschedule, or they at least don’t take it personally.”
“I get what you’re saying…dating is hard when you have a demanding job.”
“Exactly.”
“So…are you going to ask me out?”
“Can’t, not until this is all done at least. Conflict of interest.”
“Oh.”
“But when I do, are you saying you’ll say yes?”
“I guess we’ll find out when you ask, won’t we?”
//
Harry helped you go over the inspection report once you got it. You asked for some money towards getting the furnace serviced, and the previous owners thought it was a reasonable request. You were able to close a couple of weeks later. Typically the realtor comes to the bank with the buyer on the big day.
“Harry!” Doris squeals as she hugs him. “Great to see you.”
“Same to you.”
“Love when we get to see each other like this.”
“Same here, how’s your son?”
“Oh, he’s great. Y/N, have a seat. We have lots of things to sign.”
You sign what you need to. Doris gives you a gift bag with some wine glasses. Harry hands over a bottle of champagne to you as well. It was very exciting. You were officially a home owner.
“Thank you so much.” You shake Doris’ hand before leaving the bank.
Harry grabs your wrist once you’re both outside.
“Congratulations.”
“Thanks, I literally couldn’t have done it without you.” You give him a quick hug. “My parents are gonna meet me there soon so they can check it out. I think they wanna take me out to eat to celebrate.”
“That’s great.” He clears his throat. “What, uh, what are you doing tomorrow?”
“Continuing to pack.” You laugh. “But, um, I could make myself available in the evening.” You smile.
“I’m having a little pool party tomorrow. Bunch of my friends are coming over, I’d love to have you over too, if you felt comfortable.”
“That sounds amazing! Can I bring anything?”
“Just your beautiful self.”
//
Your parents were very impressed with your new purchase. You did well. Saturday morning you continued your packing adventure, trying to make sure you properly labeled your boxes. You needed to make sure none of your medical journals got lost.
Even though Harry had offered over and over to teach you how to paint, your parents offered to pay for a painting crew for you, just to make things go faster. Once that was done you’d be able to move. You search your dresser for a suitable bathing suit. You weren’t sure how much skin to actually show.
“Ah ha!” You find your green, strapless one-piece that had a cute cut out in the upper part of the stomach. You’re also able to find a cute cover up dress to throw on over it.
In the latter part of the afternoon, you drive over to Harry’s. You were impressed by the neighborhood he was able to live in. All of the houses were huge. When you pull up to his house you wonder what he needed such a big house for. Maybe he entertained a lot too, just like you did.
You – just pulled up!
Harry Styles - come right around back!
You walk around to where you can hear music playing and people laughing. There were plenty of people already in Harry’s large in-ground pool.
“Y/N!” Harry waves over to you.
Damn, he has a lot of tattoos. You think to yourself.
“Hi, Harry!”
He comes over to you and kisses you on the cheek without really thinking.
“Glad you could make it. Make yourself comfortable. Plenty of food, plenty of pool.” He chuckles.
Harry’s friends were really nice and welcoming, you didn’t feel too out of place. His eyes couldn’t help but scan over your body the second you took your coverup off. Turns out Harry was a master on the grill. He made sure to pay attention to while still being a good host to his friends. It was a fun party. As the night dwindled you wanted to make some sort of move.
“You know, I’ve seen your entire backyard, but I’ve yet to be given a your of your home.”
“You’d like that?”
“It’s only fair, you’ve seen mine.” You wink at him.
He leads you inside.
“Well, you’ve seen the kitchen, obviously.”
He takes you through the first floor and then leads you upstairs. He explains that he has all the extra rooms so his family has their own space for when they come to visit.
“And this is my room, but you don’t have to-“
“No, let’s see it.” You smile.
He smiles back and opens the door. Your jaw drops when you see how much space there is. There were two closets, both filled with nice clothes.
“Come check out the bathroom. I had some work done to it last year.”
“Why do you have a double vanity?”
“For guests.” He blushes. “My last girlfriend actually, she liked having her own sink. Apparently I have too many products and they can get in the way.” He clears his throat. “Anyways, I had everything redone last year. I know a great bathroom guy if you ever wanna update anything.”
“You have a guy for everything.” You giggle. “And you do have a lot of products, two sinks makes sense.” You walk out and back into the bedroom. “So…”
“So…”
“What date number would you consider this to be?”
“Legally, the first…not legally…” He grins. “Think I’ve lost track.” He steps closer to you. “My friends liked you.”
“I liked them.” You wrap your arms around his neck. “And I like you.”
“I like you too.” His hands move to your hips. “And I really like this bathing suit. Haven’t been able to take my eyes off you all day.”
You both smile and continue to make eye contact. Harry looks down at your lips and leans in. He presses his lips to yours, and you find yourself grasping at him to pull him closer. You couldn’t remember the last time you were intimate with someone, but it had definitely been too long. You were ravenous. You open your mouth him and he groans into you. You both shuffle back to the bed and fall on top of it.
“If this feels too fast, just let me know.” He breathes as you move to straddle him.
“Harry, I want you.” You cup his cheek and he moves to kiss your palm. “But, if it feels too fast for you, we can cool it.”
“I want you too, I just wanted to make sure you didn’t feel pressured or anything.”
“I don’t, but thank you.”
You lean down to kiss him again. His hands move to the back of your bathing suit.
“Gotta get this off you.” He grunts.
You get off him to stand up.
“I’ll show you mine if you show me yours.”
“Seems to be our little theme.” He smirks.
Harry stands up and takes his trunks off. Your eyes grow wide when you look down at his hard cock. He steps towards you and helps you out of your swim suit.
“I have a fun idea.” He says as he kisses down your neck. “We’ve been in the sun all day, let’s go hop in the shower.”
You smile at him and nod. He leads you into the bathroom and gets the water in the shower going. He yanks you inside and gets you under the warm water. He backs you up to the wall and press you against it. His hands roam your body as his lips find yours again.
“I’ve thought about this so many times.” He says.
“You have?”
“Mhm, there were so many times in the houses I showed you that I just wanted to take you right then and there.”
He nips at your jaw as his hands knead your breasts. You wrap your arms back around his neck. You feel his hard cock press against your hip and it makes you whimper. One of his hands slides down your stomach. He looks at you to make sure it’s alright and you nod yes.
Your head rolls back against the tile as his fingers slips between your legs. His thumb works your clit while he works two of his fingers inside you.
“Oh my god.” You gasp and grind your hips toward his hand. You reach for his length and start to pump him.
You both were panting. You have to let go of him to clutch onto his shoulders as you release around his fingers.
“Please.” You moan. “Fuck me. I have an IUD.”
Harry kisses you and hooks one of his arms under one of your legs so he can push in at a better angle. You bite down on his bottom lip, causing him to groan loudly.
“You’re so fucking sexy.” He says into your ear as he thrusts in and out of you.
“You feel so good, Harry, fuck.”
He pulls out of you, turns you around, and presses back inside. His chest was flush with your back. You claw at the tile as he rocks in and out of you. One of his hands snakes around to rub your clit and the other works one of your breasts.
You feel a flood of things wash over you, but mostly it was another incredible orgasm. You could get used to this.
“Shit, I’m gonna come. Where do you want it?” He grunts.
“Inside me.”
“Jesus.” He groans and releases inside you. You moan out at the warm feeling.
//
“This is the softest robe in the world.”
“Glad you like it. You can wear it anytime.”
You both were cuddled up in his bed, munching on some fruit while watching TV.
“Do you have parties like this often?”
“Only when I’ve finally told a tougher home.”
“You were working with someone while working with me? How did you find the time?”
“Babe, I was working with like six other people.” He smirks.
“Doris was right, you are a shark.” You laugh.
“Gotta be able to afford this place, right?” He tucks some hair behind your ear. “You’ll stay tonight? I’m a cuddler.”
“Of course.” You giggle. “I’ll have to have you over for my next game night, you can meet all of my friends.”
“Like I said, I fully expect to be invited to your house warming.”
“That too.”
“But I’d be happy to meet your friends. Are they doctors too?”
“A couple of them are, yeah. We met in med school. Wouldn’t have made it through without them.”
You two stay up for hours, legs tangled in each other, telling each lots of things about one another. It was easy to talk to Harry, it had been since you met. He felt the same about you too. You both knew it wouldn’t be so easy to just get together. Harry’s schedule was unpredictable, and your days were long and tiring. But, neither of you really cared because you both felt like you found your person.
Harry loved game nights with your friends. He was a tad competitive, but it just made for more laughs. You both liked having your separate spaces, but you enjoyed when he could actually spend the night, or when you could spend the night at his place. Neither of you took it personally when the other was too busy or too tired either. Once you felt truly settled, you wrote Doris a thank you note for setting you up with the best realtor and the love of your life.
#harry styles#harry styles imagine#harry styles fic#harry styles x reader#harry styles x y/n#harry styles y/n#harry styles fluff#harry styles smut#harry styles smut fic#enjoy!#realtor!Harry
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HOW I RUN MY BLOG
Speed: i can be..... SO SLOW when replying to threads. it honestly just depends on my mental health for the day and if i feel capable enough to write. i can easily range from “i will reply to this thread Immediately” to “the bubonic plague has overtaken my physical form and its gonna take me a few weeks to get to it”. same goes for asks as well, but im always active on discord if u want to yell @ me
Replies: my replies usually stay in my drafts; as soon as i get to see ur reply to our thread, i save it to my drafts to make sure i dont lose it. i post them as soon as theyre ready and i dont rlly utilize my queue for things reply-wise-- mostly just for aesthetics, art, promos, etc. they can get.. way too lengthy tbh and i always tag my threads as “long thread //” as soon as the writing starts to exceed the length of the web browser. i cant really HELP IT, i just have a tendency to write a lot abt the thoughts of my muse . i apologize if this comes off as prose; i try my hardest not to go into that territory and to make sure my replies are as coherent as possible
Starters: as for starter calls, i can get super sidetracked, especially when i have 5+ people liking them and expecting from me, and i know that i say “ough this could range from a sentence to a paragraph” but i know DAMN well im gonna be writing a paragraph for every person because one liners just feel so..... dry to me?? even with this making starters arent really my strongest suit
Inbox: my inbox is always open for mutuals for interactions, questions abt maji, or jokes! all that i ask is that PLEASE only come into my inbox for interactions if we mutually follow each other. i dont care if we previously interacted mutuals are ALWAYS welcome to come in and fuck around!!
Selectivity: i’m mutually exclusive, first and foremost. i don’t how how to really describe my selectivity-- usually, if you have a tagging system, a rules page, an about, and arent flooding ur blog with so much ooc that the ic feels rare, ill be following you, even if i dont know much about the franchise. (all excluding the communities listed in my rules that i wont interact with LOL)
Wishlist: I WANNA WRITE MY YAKUZ//A 0 VERSES!!!!!!!! HOLY SHIT!!!! i know that pretentious yaku/za fans are like “uumgmghhh y0 is so overrated uumgmghh uugg” but GOD!!!! y0 will always be super close to my heart, as it was the game that got me into the series and ever since i started this blog i’ve been super excited to one day get to write my ponytailed depressed idiot !!!! i know i love angst and sad shit but i also rlly wanna highkey write goofy shit too-- maji is a goofy clown ass bitch and i wanna write him being a goofy clown ass bitch, yfeel???? i wanna write my clown!!! the majim/a circus is back in town!!
Honest Note: i feel afraid that im putting off mutuals from interacting with me, kinda afraid im intimidating but PLEEASSEE let me assure u im Baby. i am Baby Fucking Idiot. i know for a fact that there are people who are intimidated by interacting w muses from the series in general simply bc theres so much content but PLEEASE feel free to ask me any questions abt the games that u want in order to have a better understanding of them bc ill probably be able to answer them-- im almost done w/ dead souls, a good portion thru 5 and i recently started 6 but im waiting to complete 5 before i go on with beating it, yknow?? just know that if im following u and ur following me back, that means i am interested in writing and interacting and this is an invitation for u to bother me or slide into my inbox or dms to talk!!! i love u
Tagged by: stolen bc im a filthy filthy thief
Tagging: steal it !
#long post //#DASH GAMES TAG .#( 𝐍𝐎𝐓 𝐌𝐀𝐉𝐈𝐌𝐀 𝐁𝐔𝐓 𝐂𝐋𝐎𝐒𝐄 𝐈 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐊 )!! ooc. 🐍#again i got no mun fc but H
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How to enter a fandom - RPC
Hey guys, time for a friendly PSA from yours truely~
So I’ve been in and out of a lot of fandoms, made friends, enemies, frenemies, grave mistakes and happy accidents. I also see a lot of people come in other fandoms. Most of yall do great but I see some people carry in this weird sort of self deprecating attitude that can immediately turn rpers away from them, which results in; more of that self deprecation. So Im here to hopefully help out with the best ways to enter a fandom or an rpc, make your presence known and make lots of wonderful friends.
Now the first, and most important thing, and I notice a ton of people struggle with it is:
General attitude.
Let me give two examples of some first time posts.
“Hey! I’m new to the fandom. I know my bio and my theme sucks but would anyone like to rp? Maybe?”
VS.
“Hey! I’m new to the fandom. My bio and rules are located here, though they’re still under construction I’m really eager to develop them with interactions!”
Now I know the first one is tempting for a lot of reasons. You might not even feel like its all that bad, but up next to the second one it actually sounds a little...depressing, monotone, dry. Even though they start the same, one ends with me feeling like: this person really doesn’t put effort into things, they dont even really want to be here. All my threads with them are going to be lazily written or probably written with half baked enthusiasm.
The second person is happy to be here, eager to interact, admits that since they’re a new blog not everything is perfect. Yet, they don’t talk down on themselves or make it seem like anyone who talks to them will only be taking pity on them.
This is actually a big problem I see in the rpc. Making people take pity on you for interactions and the rule with that is simple:
don’t make people feel like they have to take pity on you.
It’s a knee jerk reaction, I know. We’re all awkward humans on the internet who want to play up our faults. Who wants to say “My stuff is SO awesome! It’s the best”???
Well. You do. You’re new to a fandom. People already have established relationships, character arks, possibly with another version of the muse youre playing. Backstories so detailed it’ll make your head spin. You are literally selling yourself to these other rpers. Don’t sell them “A vacuum cleaner that sucks. No, not sucks up the dirt, it just sucks. Like me, Im trash and dont even have a working vacuum” No one wants to buy a vacuum cleaner that sucks.
Hate to break it to you, but when you say you suck, or your stuff sucks; people are gunna believe you. Or they’re just gunna pity you. And thats not great either.
Heck you might think; why not? So long as they rp with me, whats wrong with that?
Well... lots of things but mostly; pity isn’t a good feeling. Nobody wants to feel guilted into rping with you. Imagine seeing someone on your dash constantly posting about how no one likes them, their character or interacting with them. How they wanna die because they never get asks, no one likes their starters. (Sound extreme? I’ve seen it.) It makes you feel bad right? It makes you wanna like them but like- where do you even start??? They don’t even like them?? What common ground do you have?? “Hey, I see you hate yourself... uh... I hate you too?” Not great. Actually bad. You don’t know how to approach this person without becoming an emotional crutch, and you know they’ll latch on to you and suck every positive emotion out of your body so how do you win?
So lesson one is; People don’t want to be forced to feel so bad that they rp with you, they want to feel inspired to. Inspire some dudes! (or non-dude identifying people)
Presentation!
This is everything. Present yourself. You don’t need flashy icons or a cool promo- let me tell you, I’ve made some shitty promos in my life. See Here
That was my promo for a long as time. Until it was THIS that a friend made for me (A friend that I made. Through how awesome I presented myself. Thanks Vee, if you see this I still love you)
I can’t stress enough how important attitude is because I’ve had both a shitty attitude and a great one in the RPC and let me tell you, nothing kills a blog faster than a shitty attitude. Wanna make a self deprecating posts about that meme that you got 0 asks for? NUH UH. Think again. PITY = BAD, SHORT LASTING FRIENDSHIPS. INSPIRED = SUPER AWESOME HAPPY FUN TIMES FOREVER.
Yo, present yourself in a way that makes people wanna approach you. Get them interested, say something wacky or edgy or if your character is self deprecating then self deprecate through them but DO IT IN A FUN WAY. The people who care about icons and fancy promos usually aren’t worth lasting friendships either. Sometimes they literally spend more time formatting than writings something worth while for you. (some of you really balance it and just love formatting but u know im not talking about u Im talking about those that literally wont talk to us that dont)
So present yourself well and be genuine.
--- WAIT WAIT WAIT- be genuine?? What if my genuine self is self deprecating and negative?
[JOHNNY TEST NOISE]
HELL NO shut the what up I know you’re not, I know that’s a reflex to cover up how insecure you are, I know you hate how pathetic and small you feel so you point out all the things wrong with you before someone else can. That’s not you, and you are capable of more than that.
Dude. (and non-dude identifying peeps) I’m gunna say it again. I’m gunna say it a million times; one day it will sink in. Everybody feels that way.
What?? Octo ur so cool and confident tho
You know how you never noticed?? CANT SEE MY HANDS SHAKE THROUGH THE COMPUTER.
DONT KNOW HOW LONG I HESITATED BEFORE SENDING THAT ASK MEME TO YA.
The internet is a playground because you can trick people into believing whatever you want about yourself. YEP even good things!!! You don’t have to wear your flaws on your sleeve, and you certainly don’t have to wear them like a full body cast that prevents you from doing anything fun in your life.
Take the cast off, take a risk. You literally have nothing to lose. Especially if no one interacts with you as is anyways.
Be mindful
This is more of a trick I use to make myself feel better. I don’t follow a lot of people so my dash is pretty slow. It’s fairly easy to tell when people are and aren’t active/online so I literally have to trick myself sometimes but;
If you reblog a meme and get nothing, step back and ask yourself; am I sure anyone even saw it? and are the people who did maybe to shy to send anything? Or maybe nothing in that meme applies to their character.
As a mute character I am VERY restricted to what memes I reply to. As a character who speaks VERY LITTLE I am VERY restricted to what dialogues I can send at all. This means I’m required to edit memes a little (this is allowed by most meme creators btw) or I need a very good relationship with a character in order to say/sign that many words at them.
And worse case scenario, queue it and reblog it again/later. Its no biggie, some memes don’t make it.
Self reflect
Check out people on the dash. Do they have interactions? What are they like? Is their character more welcoming? Maybe you’re character is more intimidating. You might need to actually seek out interaction.
Tumblr has this huge enigma where everyone wants asks but no one wants to send them. Curious anons come from someone, magic anons come from your peers, followers, friends. Some of them are pretty obvious. Want asks? Send them. We really need to get the ball rolling with this because its honestly a problem. Show some initiative and reach out. It actually feels pretty good seeing someone react to your outrageous anon. And its a lot of stress relief if you play an otherwise very serious character to get to branch out and be silly.
So you send asks, you like starter calls- why isn’t it working?
Well, a stranger knocks on your door and tries to get to know you. Its a little awkward- it can work sure in some cases. But in most you’ll probably close the door and phone the police.
The RPC isn’t as strange as that but what’s easier? Talking to a muse you’ve never met from a blog you’ve never seen before? Or writing a thread with your best bud, throwing in inside jokes and references to your favourite shows- teasing each other about that one embarrassing thing that happened to your muse- yeah. Yeah you get it.
If you have history or at least an idea what someone is like, you will want to interact with them more. I don’t know if you’re some mean... meanie pants whos gunna smack my muse because he offered you a cookie. And maybe you are, but if I don’t know you, or know that your muse is deeply traumatized by cookies, I might take that as you saying “Ew no get away I never wanna rp with you”.
It sounds harsh, but I KNOW it happens. It STILL happens to me, even with people I’m friends with. Even if someone has multiple blogs and I get on fine with one muse, if the other hates me I might get uneasy about sending in asks cause I feel like I’m directly bothering the mun (who I love on this blog but WHAT IF THEY START HATING ME THERE TOO???)
Separation is tricky. We all get jealous or feel neglected when our partners focus on another thread/ship or send mean angsty replies which is why its important to check yourself remind yourself you have value, mun =/= muse and that it’s all in good fun.
Have Rules
UGH no!!! Not rules I hate rules, I dont want to restrict anyone!
Listen. I get it. I was a rule-less blog for a long time. But you know what? You need them. Not just for you, but for the people who wanna interact. I still feel the need to ask people who have rules what they are and aren’t comfortable with. You might not realize it but shit can go down in rps especially in certain fandoms. Even if its just the basics. Write them. They matter.
Unless you’re fine with someone literally controlling your character, or a blog you dont even follow who RPs David Letterman tags you in a smutty thread where your muse and him are married and he’s heavily pregnant with 4 narwal baby’s I- I think you can see where I’m going.
If its just the basics, thats fine, everyone loves seeing that. No god modding, not forced shipping, ect- great. Less for me to remember. Add to it if you need to. Everyone experiences rp different. Make your experience a comfortable one.
(And stay tf away from me Preggo-letterman)
Step away.
If you’re feeling negative, just step away. Do not make a big post about it alerting everyone who follows you because they might not all respond well. If you have close friends in then fandom you can go to, talk to them, vent a little, or just remove yourself and get those feelings out. But remember that no one here is equipped to be your therapist, and we cant all be expected to take the burden from you. It is up to you to regulate your emotions. Use coping skills but please don’t make the fandom or your blog a toxic place to be.
You don’t feel good, and no one reading your posts feels good, and building friendships on not feeling good is just... completely not good.
Im not saying you must be sunshine and rainbows all the time, but feeling bad feels bad and even though rping is just a hobby and a past time you are still reaching into other peoples lives. Leave a good impact, try to be someone you would want to meet in the rpc. Make it a better place.
Tips and Tricks
If you leave with nothing else, please take these:
Send Messages.
IM people, send them asks, get to know them before RPing.
Be kind.
Be generous.
Be enthusiastic.
Be happy.
#PSA!!!#Im so so so SO sorry its so long#I tried really hard to make it entertaining#anyways I just get a lot of people asking me how to enter the RPC and...#I wish I had heard this shit when I started lmao#rp#tumblr rp#roleplay
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~ still not gay ~
Word Count: 2 800
Genre: chat fic, coming out, coming to terms with sexuality, humour
Pairing(s): phan, tiny mention of kickthestickz
Warnings: swearing, so many spelling/grammar mistakes (all on purpose as it’s a chat fic), mentioned homophobia, sexual humour (not a lot)
Summary:
crabstickzzz has added PJ to the chat.
PJ: what?
dannyboy: chris and co. think im gay
A/N Shout out to the (formerly) ~ still not gay ~ chat, thanks for not believing I was straight. (Loosely based off my own unconventional coming out.)
AUGUST 12TH
dan is gay
crabstickzzz has added PJ to the chat.
PJ: what?
dannyboy: chris and co. think im gay
PJ: you are.
crabstickzzz: SUCK IT HOWELL
LouiseP: Chris, Dan clearly isn’t ready for blowjobs yet.
dannyboy: IM NOT GAY
PJ: sure.
crabstickzzz: wat about ur crush on phil
AmazingPhil: His what now
dannyboy: i dont have a crush on phil
PJ: sure.
dannyboy: im straight guys cmon
PJ has changed the chat name to dan is in denial and gay.
dannyboy: oh for fucks sake
dannyboy: seriously guys im 100% sure im straight
PJ: sure.
-
AUGUST 15TH
dan is in denial and gay
AmazingPhil: Why is the name always about Dan
LouiseP: This group chat is dedicated to whether or not Dan is gay. And memes.
crabstickzzz: thats all we talk about so theres no point in creating another
PJ: i’ve been in this group chat for two days and it’s true.
dannyboy: why does it matter what i am
crabstickzzz: bc u wont admit ur gay! we r teaching u to love and accept urself 4 who u r!!!
dannyboy: bullshit
AmazingPhil: Maybe we should lay off Dan a bit
dannyboy: thank you filip
AmazingPhil: Never mind please continue
dannyboy changed the chat name to i hate you all
-
Private chat between dannyboy and AmazingPhil.
AmazingPhil: You’re not mad, are you?
dannyboy: no
AmazingPhil: Sure?
dannyboy: its fine. theyre joking and having fun. i just dont get why they care so much about my sexuality though
AmazingPhil: Maybe Crabstickzzz and PJ have a crush on you and Louise is trying to wingman both???
dannyboy: yeah right. can you imagine?
AmazingPhil: You never know
dannyboy: for starters, nobody has, or ever had, or ever will have a crush on me, and secondly, crabstickzzz and pj are dating
AmazingPhil: WHAT? WHEN? HOW?
dannyboy: well i dont know for sure but cmon
AmazingPhil: Oh good. I thought I had missed their big reveal
AmazingPhil: Also don’t be so sure about the crush thing
dannyboy: what? who has a crush on me?!
dannyboy: PHIL LESTER ANSWER ME
-
NOVEMBER 20TH
i hate you all
dannyboy: GUYS OH MY GOD DID YOU SEE THE PIC ZAC EFRON JUST POSTED
LouiseP: Who’s Zack?
PJ: oh boy.
dannyboy: HOW DARE YOU! ZAC**** IS THE ACTOR OF TROY BOLTON AKA MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
AmazingPhil: I JUST SAW IT TOO HE LOOKS SO GOOD
dannyboy: I KNOW RIGHT?????
LouiseP: daNIEL
PJ: HAH KNEW IT.
dannyboy: what
crabstickzzz: ur not good at being straight, my friend
dannyboy: oh come on! i may be straight but im not BLIND!
PJ: sure.
dannyboy: phil back me up!
AmazingPhil: Dan has a point.
crabstickzzz: spoil sport
crabstickzzz has kicked AmazingPhil from the chat.
dannyboy: OI
LouiseP: Chris, add him back in.
crabstickzzz: fineeee only cause ur scary
crabstickzzz has added AmazingPhil to the chat.
dannyboy has changed the chat name to welcome back fil.
AmazingPhil has changed the chat name to chris sucks.
dannyboy: i second that
crabstickzzz: wat did i do???
PJ: you’re really asking yourself that?
-
NOVEMBER 25TH
chris sucks
LouiseP: It’s been five days are you all dea?
crabstickzzz: yep im so dea
LouiseP: Oh shut up, like you can talk.
PJ: he never stops talking. don’t encourage him, for my sake.
crabstickzzz: do not
AmazingPhil: Do too
PJ: do too.
dannyboy: do too
crabstickzzz: alright i get it
LouiseP: Do too.
LouiseP: Whoops.
crabstickzzz: watevr
crabstickzzz: so dan have u figured out that ur gay yet
dannyboy: for the last time, im like 99% sure im straight
PJ: that’s 1% less than last time.
crabstickzzz: progress!!!
dannyboy: no its just that if evan peters wanted to fuck me, i wouldnt say no
LouiseP: Hardly anyone would.
dannyboy: see? it doesnt prove anything
AmazingPhil: well…
dannyboy: I THOUGHT YOU WERE ON MY SIDE
PJ: welcome to the dark side.
AmazingPhil: I just go for whatever side is winning! Can’t blame a man for surviving
dannyboy: thats not the saying
AmazingPhil: It is now!
dannyboy: weve been over this! you cant steal sayings and try to change them
AmazingPhil: I just did
dannyboy: why am i friends with you
crabstickzzz: bc u like him
dannyboy changed the chat name to ~ still not gay ~.
PJ: sure.
LouiseP: You say that a lot.
PJ: it’s because it’s needed. if dan didn’t deny the blatantly obvious, i wouldn’t have to be sarcastic all the time.
crabstickzzz: dont lie to urself
-
NOVEMBER 27TH
~ still not gay~
dannyboy: oh my god oh m y god
AmazingPhil: What?!
dannyboy: fcukin evan peters in ahs
AmazingPhil: ARE YOU WATCHING WITHOUT ME
dannyboy: maybe…
AmazingPhil: BETRAYAL
crabstickzzz: gayyyyyy
dannyboy: fuck off let me have this chris
PJ: yeah chris, fuck off.
dannyboy: thanks pj
PJ: it’s okay. also...
dannyboy: what
PJ: gayyyyy.
AmazingPhil: Okay but Dan has a point
LouiseP: True!
dannyboy: phil and louise are my only friends
crabstickzzz: danyul they both like guys doesnt that say something
dannyboy: psh whatever
-
DECEMBER 25TH
~ still not gay ~
dannyboy: ugh im stuck with sucky wifi away from home :(
AmazingPhil: Aw! Does that mean no skype tonight?
dannyboy: im using my data rn and its so slow, skype would be a nightmare. sorry phil
AmazingPhil: I’ll see you when you get back, then.
dannyboy: yeah :)
crabstickzzz: ugh stop flirting
PJ: yeah, get your own chat.
LouiseP: I think it’s cute.
dannyboy: yeah okay im leaving
PJ: he didn’t deny the flirting part though.
-
JANUARY 1ST
~ still not gay ~
dannyboy: new years and no one to kiss wow what a surprise
AmazingPhil: My offer still stands ;)
LouiseP: WAIT, WHAT OFFER?!
crabstickzzz: yeah wat offer
PJ: is no one gonna..?
PJ: okay fine I guess I’ll have to do it.
PJ: gayyyyyyy
AmazingPhil: I wish
dannyboy: keep dreaming philly ;)
LouiseP: I ship it.
PJ: join the club.
dannyboy: can anybody read what the title of this chat is
crabstickzzz: we can we just dont care
PJ: the only reason no one has changed it is because of its irony.
-
JANUARY 12TH
Private chat between dannyboy and AmazingPhil
dannyboy: ahH EVAN PETERS
AmazingPhil: Dan are you sure you’re not gay
dannyboy: well i mean i have liked girls before so even if i did like guys i wouldnt be gay
AmazingPhil: Bi?
dannyboy: maybe idk
dannyboy: but anyway EVAN PETERS
-
JANUARY 16TH
~ still not gay ~
dannyboy: this chat is so quiet
AmazingPhil: For the first time in forever
dannyboy: did you literally just reference Frozen
LouiseP: What’s wrong with Frozen?!
AmazingPhil: Yeah Dan what’s wrong with Frozen
PJ: he probably thinks its gay lmao.
crabstickzzz: dans literally the epitome of no homo
dannyboy: wow what a big word you used there chris
dannyboy: do you even know what it means
dannyboy: also i’ll have you know i have proudly never said no homo
AmazingPhil: I’ve tested that ;)
PJ: WOAH WHAT DID PHIL JUST MAKE A DIRTY JOKE?
LouiseP: PHIL, I THOUGHT I RAISED YOU TO BE A GOOD CHILD.
crabstickzzz: DAN WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO HIM
dannyboy: wouldnt you like to know
crabstickzzz: wht te h fcuk
PJ: … GAYYYYYYY.
LouiseP: I second that.
AmazingPhil: I hope that
dannyboy: that doesnt make sense
PJ: okay, straight boy, he meant ‘fil hopes you’re gay, as in attracted to boys, no “no homo”’.
dannyboy: im not an idiot
crabstickzzz: debateble
dannyboy: debatable* dumbass
-
JANUARY 30TH
~ still not gay ~
dannyboy: HAPPY BIRTHDAY PHIL MY BEST FRIEND
LouiseP: Happy birthday! Wow, January went by quickly.
dannyboy: yeah can you believe that Phil Lester created January and the world was so hyped for his birthday it sped up time
PJ: oh my god, guys, holy shit.
crabstickzzz: what
PJ: DAN DIDN’T TALK ABOUT HOW BIRTHDAYS ARE A STEP CLOSER TO DEATH. AM I ALIVE?
crabstickzzz: hoLY FUCK UR RIGHT
LouiseP: Dan, you feeling okay?
dannyboy: jeez sorry for wishing my friend a happy birthday
AmazingPhil: I thought it was sweet
crabstickzzz: yeah we get it u love each other
PJ: they’re so cute but so gross.
dannyboy: i dont like phil cmon guys
AmazingPhil: I thought we had something :( you even forgot to talk about the inevitability of death for me :((((
PJ: hey, at least he didn’t say he doesn’t like guys or reference the chat name.
-
FEBRUARY 3RD
~ still not gay ~
dannyboy: ugh people suck
AmazingPhil: What happened?
dannyboy: nothing
PJ: sure.
LouiseP: You can tell us, Dan.
crabstickzzz: as long as its not blackmail worthy bc in that case dont be so sure
LouiseP: Chris.
crabstickzzz: i was joking, ofc he can tell us
dannyboy: nvm, i said it was nothing
-
Private chat between dannyboy and AmazingPhil
AmazingPhil: Seriously what happened
dannyboy: one of my old friends from uni keeps asking me when im getting a girlfriend or making jokes about my lack of love life every time he sees me and im sick of it
AmazingPhil: You’ve complained about him before and it you never seemed too bothered
dannyboy: yeah well…
AmazingPhil: ?
dannyboy: i know it shouldnt bother me but this time when i tried to ignore all of his questions about getting a girlfriend or whatever he said “you’re gonna turn gay and be alone”
dannyboy: like i know gay isnt an insult but at the same time it bugs me? is that wrong?
AmazingPhil: I don’t think so. Maybe it was just that he said something like that in the first place
dannyboy: maybe… or like some internalised homophobia idk i feel shitty
dannyboy: im just so tired of everyone asking me when im gonna get a relationship
dannyboy: my mum has been making hints at it lately
AmazingPhil: I love your mum but everyone should back off
dannyboy: this is cheesy but you’re the best
AmazingPhil: No problem <3
dannyboy: <3
-
FEBRUARY 4TH
~ still not gay ~
dannyboy: youll all be happy to know that i almost accidentally kissed a guy today
crabstickzzz: o H YM GOD DANYUL WELCOME TO THE GAY SIDE
dannyboy: a l m o s t + a c c i d e n t a l l y
PJ: sure.
dannyboy: i thought you had stopped with the sarcastic sures
PJ: keep dreaming, howell.
crabstickzzz: shut up time for the important qs
crabstickzzz: was it fil
LouiseP: Please for the love of god let it be Phil.
AmazingPhil: Let what be me
dannyboy: they’re freaking out over the almost kiss
AmazingPhil: Oh! Sorry guys, it wasn’t me
crabstickzzz: NOOOOOOOOO
PJ: sure.
LouiseP: Liesssssssssssssss.
dannyboy: it was this cute guy who ive been friends with for a while and we were messing around and whispering in each others ears to waste time during some meeting that was probably important and i turned just as he was whispering something and our lips almost touched
dannyboy: we jumped back just in time
PJ: there was so much gay in that that I can’t even form a coherent reason as to why it was gay.
AmazingPhil: Can you believe that Dan cheated on me :(((((()(09()
crabstickzzz: CUTE GUY? WHISPERING IN EARS? HOWL U R GAY OK
PJ: good news, chris just said my reasons for me.
LouiseP: Who’s the lucky guy?
dannyboy: first of all, weve been over this. i know when someone is cute, guy or girl. second of all, we were whispering creepy stuff like “mayonnaise” to try and freak each other out and third of all, not telling because id know you guys would stalk him
AmazingPhil: I know who it is ;)
PJ: i bet it’s phil.
dannyboy: nope. i said CUTE guy
AmazingPhil: HEY!
dannyboy: kidding. but no, it wasnt phil
-
FEBRUARY 8TH
~ still not gay ~
LouiseP: Alright, for today we put a halt on the usual Dan is gay discourse.
dannyboy: thank you friend
PJ: why? did someone die?
crabstickzzz: BREAKING TRADITION IS NOT ALLWD!!!
LouiseP: Shush, let me talk about a cute guy I saw today.
LouiseP: Anyway how do I ask him out?
AmazingPhil: Wait until Valentines and anonymously get him a rose.
dannyboy: ask him out or let your feelings pile up and watch him inevitably move on because you’re too scared to make a move
PJ: talk to him on the internet until you become best friends and be gay oops i meant straight for each other.
crabstickzzz: love poems via mysterious skype calls no one gets to know the contents of
LouiseP: The last two are unrealistic. Who talks to a stranger on the internet??? Stanger danger!1!!1!
dannyboy: fil i think theyre picking on us
AmazingPhil: Fair enough
dannyboy: YOURE SUPPOSED TO BE ON MY SIDE
-
FEBRUARY 11TH
~ still not gay ~
dannyboy: i cant wait to get nothing on valentines
LouiseP: Same.
AmazingPhil: Same
PJ: same.
crabstickzzz: sam
crabstickzzz: samr*
crabstickzzz: SAME****
dannyboy: this chat is so depressing
dannyboy: also learn how to spell
crabstickzzz: np
crabstickzzz: no*
-
FEBRUARY 13TH
~ still not gay ~
dannyboy changed the chat name to ~ not gay, but bi ~
crabstickzzz: I KNEW IR
dannyboy: shush
crabstickzzz: I FCUKIGN KNEWS IT
dannyboy: you saw nothing
crabstickzzz: YOURE BI
dannyboy: i was right about not being gay though
crabstickzzz: BUT I KNEW YOU WERENT STRAIGHT
PJ: WOAH WOAH WAIT WHAT’S HAPPENIGN OH MT FGDPL.
LouiseP: PJ ISN’T USING FULL STOPS!!! HE’S BROKEN!
LouiseP: DAN, YOU’VE BROKEN ALL OF US!!!
dannyboy: I SAID I WAS 99% SURE I WAS STRAIGHT
crabstickzzz: I WAS RIGHT AND YOU WERE WRONG
dannyboy: NO YOU THOUGHT I WAS GAY
dannyboy: WE WERE ALL WRONG
PJ: S T I L L.
AmazingPhil: This is so amusing
LouiseP: WHY ISN’T PHIL JOINING OUR FREAKING OUT?!
dannyboy: … might have came out already yesterday maybe haha dont kill me
PJ: WHAT?
crabstickzzz: FUK U FIL AND DANYUL
LouiseP: AND YOU’RE ONLY TELLING US NOW??????
dannyboy: yeah well coming out to phil was the first time ive ever done it so it was a little emotionally exhausted and i shook so much that i needed to recharge
AmazingPhil: He was so nervous but I’m proud of him
PJ: yeah, same.
LouiseP: I second that!
crabstickzzz: I FUCKING NKEW TOU WERE GAY
AmazingPhil: I thought we had gotten past this bit
dannyboy: chris, read the new name. im still not gay, just extremely bi
crabstickzzz: sry but i cant believe ur finally coming out
LouiseP: If you don’t mind me asking, what made you realise you were bi?
dannyboy: it all started with this one guy in high school who was so fucking hot and i had like a teensy bit of a crush on him and omg he was so pretty and one time i saw him literally leaning against a wall with his hair messed up and i died
dannyboy: i thought it was a one-time thing and i wasnt really sure if it counted considering ive only ever been attracted to girls before that, but recently ive just come to terms with that and the other thing
crabstickzzz: WHICH IS
dannyboy: nnnnnnnothing
PJ: sure.
AmazingPhil: Ha you guys aren’t on best friend level, so of course you don’t know
crabstickzzz: r00d
dannyboy: dont worry he doesnt know either, hes just being a little shit
AmazingPhil: Love you too
LouiseP: Can you imagine how much we would’ve freaked out over Phil’s message in August?
PJ: seasons change and people do too, apparently.
-
FEBRUARY 14TH
~ not gay, but bi ~
dannyboy: [image attached] someone sent me this chocolate rose with a note saying “- Voldemort” i wonder who that could be??!?!?
PJ: yeah, can anyone think of a super pale nerd who likes Harry Potter almost as much as Dan does and knows where he lives??? I’m coming up blank!!!1!!
LouiseP: Awwww, that’s so sweet!
crabstickzzz: barf
AmazingPhil: Thanks Louise I spent 2 whole pounds on it
dannyboy: spending so much for his boyfriend ew sap stop wasting money
PJ: bOYFRIEND?
crabstickzzz: WAIT I THOUGHT U 2 WERE JUST BEING WEIRD AND PLATONIC COUPLEY LIKE U ALWAYS R AND UR TELLING ME UR DATING
AmazingPhil: It turns out that the “other thing” Dan mentioned was him liking me
dannyboy: and also staring at his lips whenever he talks to me and thinkingaboutkissingthemmaybehah
LouiseP: CONGRATS, GUYS!
PJ: this is like my OTP.
crabstickzzz: *teenage girl voice* OH MY GOD MY OTP
dannyboy: lets leave before they start being weird
AmazingPhil: They’re our friends, don’t worry so much
crabstickzzz: so like did your first kiss involve tongue or
AmazingPhil: Yeah, bye.
crabstickzzz: he didnt say no
LouiseP: cHRIS.
dannyboy: if you must know, it involved NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS
dannyboy has left the chat.
AmazingPhil has left the chat.
PJ: …there was definitely tongue.
LouiseP: Agreed.
#phanfiction#phandom#phanfic#phan#came out last monday (13th feb)#to the still not gay chat#came out to the very inactive class chat this sunday (19th feb)#(only like four people saw hah)#and am planning to maybe come out to my immediate group of friends tomorrow????#who knows#now time for the tags to promote my stuff#chat fic#coming out#humour#kickthestickz#homophobia mention
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