#also despite that my health class was like ok let's split into boys and girls | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

fictional-worlds-are-exquisite · 3 years

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i dunno, a grey bathrobe with a mouse face on the hood seems pretty fitting for a vampire. mine is bright pink tho and when i say bright i mean it's neon pink. my family hates it, literally anyone who sees it hates it. it's my favourite thing. the best buy i've ever made

your teacher is wild. they have run out of fucks to give. oh a ten year old is asking me for a frying pan? seems reasonable, let me go get one

oh and definitely. me and a knife? nope, would not recommend, -5000/10. it's why i don't cook. i mostly just bake stuff, because that usually doesn't involve cutting things up. i stopped counting all the times i had an accident with a knife, because i couldn't keep count. it's just that every goddamn time i take a knife in my hands i either cut myself or break the knife. sometimes both. i have however somehow magically avoided needing to go to the hospital every single time, so i'm not sure whether to call myself lucky or unlucky. (i'm still leaning towards the unlucky, because this sucks)

they told you about different sexualities in health class? that's so cool! i wish they did that here. i bet it would help a lot of people! also you were definitely very oblivious about your crush! but i can't say anything because me too. even now that i know i'm panromantic i still spent months thinking that those are most definitely platonic feelings i'm feeling for this girl. butterflies in my stomach? being just so goddamn happy when i'm around her? wanting to hold her hand? those are friend feelings right? (also she sometimes sends me nudes and i constantly mess up while trying to react like a normal person to them. one time i just replied asking whether she bought new shower curtains and then spent the next couple of minutes banging my head against the wall because even my asexual ass realised that that was probably the wrong thing to say)

anyways...

well, it's definitely different this year, celebrating christmas, but it's still fun, christmas eve went well and i'm pretty excited for christmas breakfast tomorrow, because it's always my favorite part! so yeah! thank you, that was very nice! ❤️

excellent, if halloween was a thing here i’d take that into account and add it to my vampire costume. halloween is not a thing here though so i guess i’ll just wear it down to the shops with some vamp teeth idk. also that sounds incredible. i love obnoxiously bright things. if it hurts people’s eyes then i’m doing something right. i am going against the masses and saying i love it.

i know right? he was from Germany, I think, and possibly quite new to the country and the nz education system (or at least, we...didn’t really learn anything that year...he just kind of let us play on the computers a lot...it must’ve been his first year teaching) so maybe he just figured that was chill in nz schools. a fair enough assumption considering the chaos of children.

oh geez. that does not sound good. at least you haven’t had to go to hospital yet though, that’s a plus. but it does sound awfully unlucky. it seems that whenever i come near a knife i find a cut on me afterwards. not like, a big cut. not even a cut that bleeds, normally. but just like the tiniest shallow cut ever. I have no idea how I manage it each time. it’s not b a d exactly it’s just alarming that i never notice it at the time. I also get a bit of double vision sometimes and I’ve noticed that when I’m trying to cut something precisely like vegetables I’ll struggle to see exactly where the knife is and well...I just go very slow and keep my fingers far away. I don’t trust my eyesight one bit. very impressive that you manage to break the KNIFE though, I’ve never done that. Bent many spoons real bad in my time tryna get ice cream but no knife deconstruction here.

oh yeah! they did. I figured it was just a normal thing to teach in nz high schools and I was like wow. sure is great here! uhhh turns out no. Once I hit uni and took a gender and sexuality class and spoke with my classmates, it turned out that very very VERY few of them ever had that kind of thing brought up in health class. Hell, some of them were like we basically got taught abstinence (although they mostly then pointed to the religious nature of their schools, I guess that’s a trend). I was a little shocked some schools skipped sex ed that bad. Then earlier this year I did some research into the nz health curriculum for a presentation for an english class and like. it’s IN the curriculum. if you dig deep enough for this info. It’s just that what’s in the curriculum isn’t exactly compulsory. Which is a problem. Because then it only gets taught if the teacher decides to. For example, my younger sister (by roughly 3 years) attended the same high school as me but she never got any discussion of sexualities or gender identities or whatever in health class. It comes down to the teacher and I hate that so much. it SHOULD be taught to everyone, everywhere, it sure did help me. ANYWAY. i’ve already gone on this rant many times I will stop here

I’m glad it’s not just me in this boat haha. platonic...romantic...i mean who really knows the difference until it’s been 6 months and actually, now that you think about it, maybe there’s something funny going on here. o h n o. what lovely shower curtains! where’d you get them? oh n o. i feel like i’ve been sent a nude once before by a straight friend (who was a girl) who did not know I was queer and I was. how do straight people respond to this. respectfully i am looking only at your face so i don’t make you uncomfortable is actually not what i should be doing here, clearly. you...sure do have a body...good job! that’s...some good looking flesh! i- thank god this has never happened again. i would not be any better.

I’m glad you still had fun and I hope the breakfast ended up going well! A Christmas breakfast sounds interesting. I feel that’s a whole different area of foods to make something nice out of, I’m so used to special lunches and literally nothing else, breakfast foods seem fun.

#sorry for the late reply! it's been a busy couple of days and i've been a bit drained #also despite that my health class was like ok let's split into boys and girls #girls what do u find attractive about boys and vice versa #brainstorm it!#and the girls group gathered up and started saying stuff and i just #uhhh...chest? is that...is that a thing we like about men...?#i think at the time i genuinely did ask my group are boys chests attractive #dkfjhskdjfhsdf gee whiz i wonder what lindsey's sexuality is #anyway different subject #i would love a special breakfast on christmas but with my acid reflux i can't really eat anything for breakfast #a single bit of toast with peanut butter is what i have every single day of the year lmaoo #at least it sits in my stomach okay #come lunch i'm good to eat normally which is nice #no one ask me how many mini quiches i ate today i lost count #i ate so many #it's a problem #Anonymous

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aintyourlove · 4 years

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All the kdramas that I’ve watched (2020 - part 1)

Disclaimer: I already made another two list that you can find here.This a part one, I decide to split so the post wouldn’t be so long. hope u guys like!

Revenge note 1:

It’s a high school one

It’s about this girl that will have to deal with a first breakup-, bullying, insecurities, first true love, friendship and also some revenge, why not right? lol

SOFT kdrama although the name suggest more dramatic things

a lot of farts jokes (like for real)

To the beautiful you:

If you like that movie “she’s the man” then you going to like it

Goo-Jae-hee decides to live in a dormitory as a boy and live with the one who gave her strength in the past and now she is determined to support him like he (unconsciously) did in the past

TOO MANY clichés that if it wasn’t so over do it probably wouldn't work so well, kinda of the charm of this dramas is bc it's too innocent and old

some things bothered me while watching, like: the main character just liked her bc he knew that she was a girl?it was that? I had this impression and I didn’t see much of his personality besides the obvious guy who don't care about nothing but will care forf her (of course)...

The best friend was funny and actually way more supportive than the other one; him didn't know that “he” was a girl and had to deal with this for a long time and for me this is huge and important even tho they joke about the whole time

Tempted:

Joy from RedVelvet is the main reason for me go to watch this one

Basically it’s a fanfic lol (but I mean all the kdramas are in some point :p)

It's about these three best friends; Choi Soo jin, Kwon Shi-hyun and Lee Soo-jo that comes from different but all them chaotic family's and as a form to build a wall from the pain and everything they become used to play with people who were in their way, for them it’s fun doing little revenges ... Nothing matter to them, except them. It’s in one of these “games’ that Eun Tae-hee(Joy) becomes the target. She is a victim to be seduced, to be tempted by Shin-yun. But thing about games and people are that they don’t stay the same, and everything could happen, everything can change, even the feelings, even the people, even the solid bonds.

Lee Soo Jo it’s a sweet one, I feel bad for him sometimes

Tae-hee is a mood, she is mature and have this force idk she wouldn’t let her head down and I love strong characters that just don’t buy some bullshits and literally go talk to make everything clear.

8/10

Itaewon Class:

It’s based on one webtoon what is pretty cool

The stories it’s about Saeyori, a guy that is convicted in his principles, his dad taught him to live his life as he wanted and to be a good person besides everything. When Sayeori dad’s pass away he swears to God a that it won't be for nothing and those who wrong him would it pay when the times come. So he carries for more than ten years a life plan to get back at the ones that wanted him to get on his knees.

Jo si yeo well: I was sometimes disappointed with her (and you will see why) but besides that she a character that I personally like, she is not just a girl, she has personality, and she stands for that; they said to us that she has a tendency to sociopath and a lot of her comer from that, I really really like her, she is what she is and not a boring girl that will always do the right thing that is BORINGGGG please more roles like that like people that can be good but have personal traces that are unique.

Has so many good choices of topics to be discussed and are relevant to not only young people but society in general; talks about trans gender, racism, bullying, like how you can change your life if you really put effort on it and that everybody has a choice to make it your own destiny

Cheese in the trap:

It’s about this girl, Hoong-Seol, she is the only one that suspect about the “generous, sympathy and handsome” guy of the university, he is the senior that everybody likes and despite all the weird things that surround him nobody seems to know him really well. But Hong Seol feels that something is strange and bc of that their ways started to inter-wise more and more and the doubts become a sign of...love?

Honestly even though it explained why he is that way I was kinda of “shocked” sometimes, and when she was accepting things (like really scary things (that in my personal opinion are NOT health but ok) bc of love I was like girrrl?? Get out of there now)

THE SECOND GUY CURSE I don’t even have to say that for most of the times the seconds guys are the best ones (the ones at least that shows more charisma or personality ...) but you know that they won't be together, in this case I thought that was insane...

Baek In-ha honestly? I love her uahuahuaauh best scenes best phrases she is indeed an icon.

8/10 :)

I Started Following Romance:

Super sweet and well-made it as a short drama

Only 10 episodes and it’s only 7/8 minutes each one

Modern and lovely way to represent how the youth deal with break-ups and social medias by these days with all the technologies and stuff

It’s about a girl that broke up but still see how her ex-boyfriend is doing by following him in social medias, that makes her really anxious and sad so move on it’s more than necessary. Social Medias could it be a way to not only meet people but reconnected them with themselves too

You should watch it like right now

10/10

Is it you, my girlfriend?:

it’s about a girl who accidentally declares herself girlfriend of one of the most famous guys on her school, he is totally the opposite of her, and even tho he is known by the entire school she doesn’t acknowledge him until he approaches her asking if is she the one...the one who is his girlfriend

it's a high school so has all that we love, its sweet and funny and there’s a season 2 which is good as well

8/10

link to watch on youtube

A-TEEN - Rumors Spread About ME:

it passes in high school so the story goes around between this two girls who are friends with each other and has the same name, but are opposites in personality. Even though that wasn’t a problem for them the rumors that start to spread in the school makes the friendship collapse and a name maybe is not the only thing that they share

it was pretty nice, I really like some actors in there, the story’s cool, they talk about bullying, friendship, first love and they have season 2 that is pretty cool too!

9/10

link to watch on youtube

LIKE:

the story starts with main girl selecting people for her new project, a project that she is doing to prove to herself that be at the art school was the right choice, but more than discovering herself she may be aware that not only her senior, who was her crush since the beginning is watching her but another two guys, that are closer than she would it expected

talks about friendship, about felling demotivated sometimes, first love, sexual harassment with minor in schools...

The girl from heart signal 2 is there :) (which I thought it was really cool bc I'm too into heart signal these days)

8.9/10

link to watch on youtube

Romance talking:

This one was one of my favs bc I kinda like more when they’re in college;

it's a story about a girl who was super into a guy whom host an internet talk show where he mostly talks about romantic topics. Besides that unilateral interest she lives a normal life, almost boring by her point of view. She works at a bar and in one of common day her ex-boyfriend appears there, and she listens to him badmouthing her, even though she doesn’t care about him anymore it hurts, so she gets back on him, which could be a bad idea later when she was alone if wasn’t for someone... someone that she doesn’t believe its out of her computer screen...

the girl is so real, like sometimes we really feel angry, bored, deeply in love or jealous/envy I think that the actress did a great job here

10/10

link to watch on youtube

Weightlifting Fairy Kim Bok-joo:

I saw that Jisoo was here and later I discover that the main actress is the iconic one who did Baek-In-ha in Cheese in the trap (Jisoo doesn’t have a big role tho..) but my other fav Kang Ki-young otherwise has a role as Bok-joon’s uncle heheh

Kim Bok Joo is an weightlifting girl, who is proud of her sport and department in college but sometimes she feels insecure when comes to sensitive topics as love or how guys sees her. As a way to hide those insecurities Bok-Joon doesn’t let anyone says nothing to her and deal with provokes, becoming known in campus bc of her temper. But when a certain guy shows kindness towards her all she wants is become girlie and delicate. What she doesn’t know is that this guys is the old brother of an old childhood friend that she meet again on campus and likes to “mess” with her making her going crazy...

its funny, sweet, the main actress is awesome, the main couple is lovely and you should watch it now

Sorry if wrote anything wrong. All the dramas here are awesome, hope you guys find some new ones to watch it!

Use the mask and don't forget to clean yourself properly, we are still in a pandemic but this will pass!

All love<3

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cloud17dreams · 7 years

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The Boy with a Laugh so Carefree (Dino)

Genre: platonic!dinoxreader

Word Count: 3900 words!!!!!! what!!!!!!!

Summary: You meet Chan in school but for some reason you’re awkward with him until Seungkwan gave you a gentle (read:violent) nudge to approach him and, hey! It turns out well.

Requested by: Our lovely Orchid!~

It was on that fateful Christmas afternoon that you met him, the boy with a laugh so carefree. Hands shoved into the deep pockets of his jeans, body covered in the gentlest shades of green, an appearance that was clean, aesthetically pleasing.

The sound of joyful chatter had been buzzing in the living hall ever since you stepped into the house a few hours ago. Surrounded by a largely tight-knitted group of best friends, you retreated back to your lil ol’ corner after formalities and stared blankly at the scene in front of you. Food, people, music, laughter - it was definitely a setting for a great party, and while you wouldn’t normally mind spending a chill night out, you were dragged by your childhood best friend, Seungkwan to this party full of strangers. Bored, you huffed and crossed your arms as you watched Seungkwan skate across the room around different groups of people, and decided after a while that weren’t going to let yourself go home upset, and especially not with an empty stomach. And so you grabbed the nearest treat within reach, and devoured it. Truffle after truffle, cupcake after cupcake, ice cream after brownies; one after another, thirds after seconds, you munched on the desserts on the counter tops, demolishing the party’s food supply steadily despite the silent pleads of the poor waiter. Good food, good music, people, laughter - wait.

“Cute boy?” you muttered, eyes trailing after the aforementioned boy. Damn. Looks like this party wasn’t going to be that much of a waste of time after all, huh? You thought, and smiled a little to yourself.

It was impossible for anyone to not notice this boy in the midst of all the delectable cuisines, and you had wondered why it took you this long - looking as though he had been catching up with his friends, it was this boy and his group that erupted with laughter all so often, attracting attention to them every now and then. It was a nice touch to the already amiable atmosphere, their laughter. Cheerful, crisp, pure joy reverberating throughout the hall, it was apparent that this said boy, this boy whose eyes twinkled reflecting the Christmas lights, was the life of the party. Interesting, you had thought back then, for a person this ethereal to be this huge bundle of joy to so many people, and took another bite off that god-sent mango pudding then, reveling in the way the sweetness burst in your mouth.

But then you had acute diarrhea that hit you like a storm a while later and had you rush to the toilet under 3 seconds. Bumping into someone on the way. Then tripping them over. Face down. With their elbows twisted at an unfathomable angle. And you didn’t even had the time to consider helping them up to apologize. I mean, well, you had to solve the more urgent business in your pants first, right?

And that was the story of how you effectively face-slammed a cute boy onto the ground three years ago. Gorgeous. However, despite the humiliating situation and embarrassing aftermath, an inevitable accident was all it was to you.

Or so you thought.

Now, as you stared down the lecture hall at the new boy in class, you couldn’t believe your luck. The same pair of sparkling eyes, the same pair of hands still shoved into his denim jeans’ pockets, the same laugh? No way, you thought, as you widened your eyes and felt your surroundings turn ice cold. “Him?”

Damn. Horrid images of mocking smirks, incessant jokes, and quiet gossip instantly flashed through your mind, and you shuddered. Gaping, you stared at the beaming boy right in front of the class. What would happen if he recognized me from that Christmas party? Would he make fun of me? Would he expose me and make me more of an embarrassment in school than I already am? You were anxious as questions raced through your mind, and soon you felt your seat mate’s gaze burn through your hunched back. Oh, right. Somewhere in the middle of your dramatic inner Q&A time you had shot down low till under your desk to hide from the boy on stage. Calming your erratic heart down, you then quickly sat back upright in your chair, and tried to persuade yourself that nothing would happen, that it probably wasn’t big enough of an event for him to remember you. You spaced out in the process, and in the end, however, your train of thought still ended up silently swerving to you willing yourself to magically become invisible while praying to all the available deities above for all the protection you could get to save you from the boy.

The carefree laugh of that flower boy just kept on haunting you even long after he sat down and the teacher started teaching, no matter how hard you tried to ignore it. Luckily, however, it seemed as though he hadn’t noticed you. In the past hour, at least. No more than three brief turns of the heads in your general direction to chat with the person sitting behind him, no sudden change in mood that might signify that he saw you and got war flashbacks from that party, and no signs of him plotting anything destructive yet. Phew, you thought, as you crossed off yet another worry you had on your temporary “Cute Boy Observation Notebook”. Extra, you knew, but you really weren’t ready to have your embarrassing accident exposed in school so soon; this was the only way you could think of to prevent them from happening as of now.

Sighing, you craned your head up slowly and scanned the crowd before you, eyes zeroing in on that familiar slender silhouette once again - a people magnet he was, definitely. No matter where you went, be it in class or in the corridors, he would always be surrounded by a large group of people. You tried to act normally in public without looking like a crime suspect or a stalker, you really did. But whenever you thought you knew exactly where he was and that you could finally slip out to another location without being spotted, he would suddenly appear right around the corner and in a split second you would have to duck into the nearest locker! Talk about fate. During break, calculus, chemistry, humanities, lunch -heck! Even during your favorite theater you couldn’t seem to shrug off that boy with a laugh so crisp, the boy who had settled down in mere seconds into a new environment and was closer to most of your classmates than you had ever been in 3 years.

It was during dance practice then that you were finally forced to look at him straight in the eye. Having been too cooped up in your dorm room studying all day, it was last semester that Seungkwan had secretly signed you up for this aerobics dance class that was allegedly supposed to be able to “get you up and moving on the road to fitness", quoting unquoting him. Heaving your reluctant body to the studio, you sighed, then snorted as you recalled the memory. Sure, you really enjoyed watching videos of people performing on stage, but things were always different when you were the one who had to physically try it out. And this wasn’t even some cool street dancing or b-boying - it was aerobics dance class. The kind that you’ve always only seen your mom and aunties go for, and you couldn’t believe that you had just allowed Seungkwan to do this to you. Maybe you should’ve have just stayed stubborn and refused to attend class. That’d be better. Yes. But these were all just what you had been muttering to yourself as you shuffled grumpily to the first aerobics dance class of the semester. Sure, you were a selfish and timid person to start with, but your long time best childhood friend neighbor classmate seatmate local confidence booster man Mr Boo Seungkwan was somebody you cherished a lot in your life, and after the long hours of nagging he had put you through just to get you to attend this class, you weren’t ready to go back to the dorms to face his wrath again. So you sighed and stepped into the class, forcefully trying to cheer yourself up. It’ll be fine.

OKAY, NO, IT’S NOT GONNA BE FINE, NOPENOPENOPENOPE was all you could shriek in your head frantically as you spotted a Chan (as you got to know his name was over the many times the girls in your class gloated over how ‘princely’ he was) stretching in front of the mirrors. But there was no turning back now.

“Kwannie~My favourite beautiful charming attractive best friend~ Won’t you just let me quit the aerobics dance class~Pretty please~ With a cherry on top~” you pleaded with your best puppy eyes one day to the boy sitting across you in the cafe.

Seungkwan paused in his motions, and sighed. “Okay, that’s enough,” he piped up finally, never really being able to resist your whines. Looking up from his drink as he scanned you upside down, he asked. “What’s the matter? Why do you hate it so much? It’s really going to be good for your health in the long run, you know-”

“I can’t even move my hips in a circle properly to start with, Kwannie, what makes you think I could dance Zumba? Everybody else seemed to have no problem with it, and I really don’t see a point in me attending it anymore when I’m struggling this much…” you pouted.

“Then why don’t you ask someone to help you with it? Don’t some kids from our year also go for that class?” he asked, quirking an eyebrow up.

Sipping from your drink, you then choked and coughed uncontrollably, patting your chest gently to calm your nerves down. “The only “kid” from our year who attends that god-damned aerobics dance class is Chan! And I can’t talk to him, or even let him know of my existence! Please, Kwannie, let me quit that class…” you begged again.

“…Y/N, do you like Chan?” Seungkwan suddenly asked after a moment of silence.

You sputtered wildly, embarrassed, feeling your cheeks burn up. “No?! I just – ok, well, remember that Christmas party you dragged me to 3 years ago?” you asked.

Seungkwan paused, propping his chin up on his palm on the table, and thought for a while. “Hmm… the one where you just camped in a corner and munched on the desserts till no end?” he asked, and chuckled again, continuing, “Yeah, I’d never forget how embarrassing it was to have to drag a sick you to the emergency room 2 am in the morning just because you overate,” he said.

You slammed your forehead into the coffee table in embarrassment, and groaned. “Yeah, that’s right, that’s the one I’m talking about.”

“What about it?” he asked.

“…do you remember how I knocked someone out as I bolted to the toilet…” you let out a flabbergasted sigh, and fell back into the comforts of the couch, continuing, “Yeah, and well, that boy was Chan, Seungkwan. I don’t know how much he remembered of the party, if he even recognized me at all, but to hell will I be taking any chances. Oh god, what if he exposes me in front of the whole school, Seungkwan?” you exclaimed frantically, “He’s so popular, I wouldn’t be surprised if he spread the news throughout the whole school in under an hour…”

And now it was Seungkwan’s turn to hit his forehead hard on the table. “It really is a miracle that we’re the bestest of friends man, y/n. How can you be so dumb, gosh.”

“Look, if by the end of this week you’re still whining to me about quitting that aerobics dance class and refusing to get any help from, let alone talk to that kid, you’re never going to see the end of it from me,” threatened Seungkwan, “I’ll make sure that the both of you become close friends at the end of this all, no matter what it takes!”

Shaking, you clenched your fists as you stared at the entrance of the dance studio, hearing practice songs already blasting out of the speakers and into your nervous senses. You were damn well ready to sprint past the looming Seungkwan just right behind you, but decided that you were more than that. You could do this. OK WAIT - how were you going to do this again? Right. Just walk up, and talk to him as though you’ve never met before. Introduce yourself. Ask for help with that one Zumba move you just couldn’t nail. Nail that Zumba move. Move on. Sounds like a plan.

“Alright,” you said to yourself, and placed your hand on the door, “Let’s get this done and over with,” you announced dramatically, and finally garnered the courage to push open the door with Seungkwan whispering a soft “fighting!” behind your back.

As soon as you walked in, sure enough, Chan was already there in front of the mirror, stretching just like the last time you saw him. Tapping your feet on the floor nervously, you took a deep breath, and walked over to him.

Staring down at the squeaky dance floor and fiddling with your fingers behind your back, you tapped on his shoulder awkwardly. “Uh, hi there, Chan,”

Startled, Chan then turned his back swiftly to see a nervous you. “Uh, hi?”

“Uh, hi, my name’s y/n, and, uh, I just noticed that you were quite good at this whole aerobics dancing thing and it’d be amazing if you could help me out with these few moves that I haven’t been able to grasp well,” you mumbled softly and quickly, hoping that Chan somehow had psychic abilities to be able to understand you so you didn’t have to repeat yourself. Luckily he did.

“Uh, sure! Which moves do you need help with?” he asked, slightly taken aback by the fact that a random person was asking him for help in dancing. “Hmm…” you paused to think, stunned by how Chan really didn’t seem to recall anything and how well this was going. “This is a little embarrassing, but you know that dance move in the second part of the song…” you muttered again, trailing off expecting Chan again to be able to pick up on your mumbling as you haven’t been able to look at him straight in the eyes as of yet. It was then when Seungkwan, who had been observing you from the entrance, decided that it was enough mumbling for you and interfered.

Oh no.

“Y/N!” shrieked Seungkwan, “OH MY GOD HI ARE YOU FINALLY ASKING FOR HELP WITH DANCE MOVES?” he exclaimed exaggeratedly, and you couldn’t help but facepalm internally for having such an embarrassing friend.

Eliciting no response from you, Seungkwan then turned to the flustered and equally awkward Chan. “You see, my friend here is a little shy, and she had been telling me about how she’d been struggling in class and I felt so bad for not being able to help her because I don’t take that class…I’m so glad that she finally mustered up the courage to come and ask help from you, she normally bottles everything up on her own,” Seungkwan blabbered then trailed away, faking a sob as you cringed yet again at how dramatic he was.

Embarrassed, you pushed Seungkwan away, and muffled his protests as you apologized to Chan. “Sorry, my friend here is just a lil’ dramatic,” Chan chuckled, agreeing silently. “But, yeah, could you help me with those dance moves?” you asked.

Both of you laughing a little more freely now, Chan then nodded and agreed, beaming. “Sure! All you’ve got to do is…”

“Thank you sososo much for today, Chan,” you said after a whole hour of practicing and finally nailing the move, “Let’s grab a drink at the coffee shop right downstairs! My treat!”

It had been a few weeks now that he had been helping you out at the aerobics dance class, and the both of you had grown to be quite close. He still hadn’t shown any signs of him remembering anything, let alone plotting anything to embarrass you, so you slowly started to open up to him.

“Sure, let’s go!” Chan laughed, and wiped his sweat with a towel then slung his sports bag over his shoulders, jogging a little to catch up with you on the way to the coffee shop.

At the coffee shop, the both of you plopped your exhausted bodies down into the comfy bean bags they had scattered around the shops, then almost literally melted into the haven of the fragrance of coffee, the blasting air conditioner, and the cozy atmosphere of the cozy place completed with the melody of an old, familiar song floating from the speakers-

“Wait - is this Beat It…? Playing over the PA system?” you sat up immediately, and perked up your ears. “Yes!” you squealed as you confirmed, and did a small dance to Beat It, completely immersed in your own world. “Damn, I really love 80’s pop,” you muttered in passing, and continued to party to that song alone despite being drained from practice previously.

Having tuned out his surroundings, Chan unfortunately missed the song, as it changed over to a song from the 00’s and you took your seat in the blue bean bag across Chan again. However, originally staring blankly into space, Chan then shot up upon hearing that statement.

“No way, really? 80’s pop?” he asked, his face brightening up immediately. “Who’s your favourite artist? John Lennon? Queen? Lionel Richie?” Chan bombarded, his whole body shaking with excitement. It was rare to have ever found somebody who liked something as geeky as this like him – being the “cool”, “edgy” teenagers at 18 you both were, this geeky side was something you both would be made fun of if anyone else knew about it. But here the both of you were, fans of a genre this specific?

You couldn’t believe your luck. First the boy from a random Christmas party turned out to be your classmate. Now you’re telling me that he’s a geek too and likes 80’s pop? You’ve got to be kidding.

“Oh. My goodness,” you gaped at him, “you like 80’s pop too?”

“Yeah!” Chan grinned, happy to have finally found someone with like interests.

“So, Who’s your favourite artist?”

“My go-to song is definitely The Way You Make Me Feel by Michael Jackson,” you said, flinging your hands around wildly in excitement, “Michael Jackson’s the King of Pop, and nobody can fight me on that!”

Chan then yelped in shock and jumped out of his seat. “DID YOU JUST SAY MICHAEL JACKSON?”

“Yeah…?” You replied timidly, and wondered if you had said something wrong. “I LIKE MICHAEL JACKSON TOO OH MY GOD HE SLAYS ME EVERYTIME I REWATCH HIS DANCE VIDEOS HE IS MY IDOL I ASPIRE TO BE LIKE HIM ONE DAY!! Y/N OMG YOU DON’T EVEN UNDERSTAND-“

“WAIT WHAT NO DON’T SHOUT,” you whisper-shouted, immediately reaching over the coffee table and putting a hand over the mouth of an overly-excited Chan to muffle his screams. Frantically scanning the café for any enraged customers, you ducked down fast behind your seat as you made sure the coast was clear. “Speak slower, Chan, I couldn’t understand a word you just said,” You whisper-laughed, watching as the now flushed Chan slowly calm down to take his seat too before he embarrassed himself further. You had never seen this side of him before, and it was amusing. It was a damn miracle that Chan could stop himself from screaming again, as you slowly let go of your hand, because you could literally see the unsaid screams burning behind the glint in his eyes.

“You like Michael Jackson too?” he asked, a sort of childish excitement lilting in his voice.

“…too?” you muttered, and paused for a while as you processed the information slowly before - “OH MY GOD PLEASE DON’T TELL ME YOU’RE A FAN OF THE KING TOO-“

“SHHHH-“ Chan laughed, clutching his aching stomach while trying to catch his breath as he watched the realization hit you like a lightning bolt. Your eyes widened indefinitely, and you stared at the boy in front of you.

“Damn,” you said, falling back into your chair from the shock. What a coincidence! “Man, when I saw you at that one Christmas party 3 years ago, I never thought that you would be an avid fan of The Kingtm too,” you blurted out mindlessly.

Chan looked at you in confusion. “You’ve seen me before 3 years ago?”

“Yeah…” you mumbled, then slapped yourself on the face once for that slip, but you guess that there wasn’t a way out anymore “3 years ago, Seungkwan - you remember the person you appeared suddenly in the dance studio embarrassingly when we first met? Yeah, that person - dragged me to this random Christmas party I think was hosted by one of his friends. I noticed you then, chatting away happily with your group of friends by the high tables. I really liked your laugh – Oh my god please don’t think I’m creepy I’m really not you were just laughing really loudly and I thought that your laugh was really carefree I’m not attracted to you or anything please don’t misunder-”

Chan chuckled joyfully, and said, “Don’t worry, y/n, you’re not the first one to have told me that,” he grinned, “But why didn’t you just approach me if you recognized me when I first came here?”

You rubbed your nape sheepishly and looked down in embarrassment. “Well, I might or might not have also been the one to have knocked you down at 1.30 am in the morning out of seemingly nowhere, if you remember…”

Chan paused at that statement, and gasped. “So it was you who dislocated my elbow? Oh my god, if I met you way back then I would have punched you straight or embarrass you already, y/n,” he laughed, eyes crinkling. “Is this why you were so nervous when you first approached me?” he asked, and burst into laughter again. “Man, this is so weird. Now that I actually know you, I suddenly don’t feel the urge to punch you anymore for that knock down 3 years ago.”

“Yeah, I was terrified of exactly that - you taking revenge on me,” you shivered slightly at the image in your mind, but couldn’t stop yourself from grinning from ear to ear at the fact that Chan didn’t want to punch you or embarrass you back anymore.

“I’m glad now that I’ve successfully dissolved that hatred,” you then chuckled, tilting your head slightly with a smile on your face.

“Definitely. How could I still when we’re still not done fangirling over - ” Chan paused, then scanned the horizon gravely before shouting “THE KING OF POP!” and taking a run for the door before the café baristas came after him with baseball bats and steel pans. You clutched your stomach and slapped the arm of the chair as you laughed hysterically. “WAIT FOR ME!” you shouted to him, bolting after him too in lightning speed after leaving change on the table top.

Author’s Notes: yesssssss finally got this out after so long :”) hope y’all enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing this half-crack fic HAHAHHA

-Admin Sapphire ^_^

#by sapphire #seventeen scenarios #dino scenarios #dino #seventeen #college au #(ALSO ZUMBA IS A COOL DANCE OK I’VE ALWAYS WANTED TO TRY IT BUT I HAD NO TIME :()#coffee shop au #platonic dinoxreader #platonic scenarios #platonic relationships #requested #orchid anon #this deadass became a oneshot #and not a simple scenario #i hope this isnt confusing or rushed #feedbacks are as usual very much appreciatedddddd ^_^#hope yall enjoyed reading it!!!

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phuongkun · 6 years

Text

When your child is diagnosed with Down syndrome - A story about motherhood and determination

I was feeding my baby Xavier on New Year’s Eve in 2008 when the consultant rang. Terror pulsed through my veins as he told me: ‘Your son has Down’s syndrome.’

I’m not proud of my reaction that day, but I felt utter devastation. I panicked it would render him — and me — an outcast.

Faith Bleasdale said she has learned to focus on what her son Xavier, four, can do and not what he can’t.

Faith with Xavier as a new-born. He was not diagnosed with Down Syndrome until he was two months old

Less than a year before, I’d been a carefree party girl with a career as a novelist and living in London. Then came a very sobering unplanned pregnancy, discovered only days after splitting up with my boyfriend-of-sorts. And now another unexpected, far more terrifying mountain lay ahead of me.

Four-and-a-half years on, I can honestly say my initial fears were unwarranted. In fact, I think Xavier’s diagnosis made me confront my sudden motherhood head on.

I’m not saying I wouldn’t have been a good mother without it, but I was certainly jolted into action. It was as if I’d been given an electric shock that sent me headlong into parenthood in a way I’d never imagined.

I had always wanted children and taken for granted that it would happen one day. I’d also thought I would be married beforehand because I’d been brought up to believe in a secure family home. My parents had always been close until my dad died when I was 32.

At that point it looked like my future was mapped out along the same lines. I was living in Singapore with my partner of ten years and marriage was on the cards.

But we split after becoming distant — the pressure of living so far from home eventually took its toll — and I returned to London alone in 2006, aged 33, with a broken heart. I moved in with a friend and threw myself into partying and dating.

Within a year I was pregnant. To say it was a surprise would be an understatement.

Not only was I technically single — I’d been seeing someone for a couple of months, but he had stopped calling just before the blue lines appeared on the pregnancy test — but I’d also thought I was infertile.

An ovary had been removed when I was 15 because of a cyst. A gynaecologist who diagnosed a problem with the remaining ovary said it was unlikely I’d have children. I was on the Pill, but this meant I didn’t take it as regularly as before.

The father said he didn’t want to be involved. He was adamant — indeed, he has never wavered from this decision despite being invited to change his mind. So I was on my own from the outset.

I wasn’t ideal mother material; my idea of supermarket shopping was buying a case of wine and a tub of olives. I vowed I’d change for the sake of my child.

Despite the shock, it never occurred to me I wouldn’t go ahead with the pregnancy. I believed from the start my baby was meant to be and my friends and family all supported this.

Apart from morning sickness, the pregnancy passed smoothly. Tests were all fine, I ate healthily, did yoga and stayed home a lot, watching Dallas box sets.

On the whole, I was happy. I was apprehensive, but deep down I couldn’t wait to meet my baby.

Faith Bleasdale admitted his diagnosis initially sent her into a black hole

At my 20-week scan, I discovered I was having a boy. The sonographer was certain because my son had his legs over his head and his ‘dangly bits’ on display. Show off; he was his mother’s son already.

It was then I left London to return home to North Devon to have my baby; despite the fact I was nearly 35, I needed my mummy!

My baby grew, I grew, even my feet grew (distressing as I did own some rather nice shoes). And I threw myself into nesting, cleaning cupboards and making a John Lewis baby list.

I went to an antenatal class where they scared me by talking about labour, so I didn’t go back. I picked a name and The Bump became Xavier Thomas Bleasdale.

In November 2008, I was taken by surprise when I went into labour. My waters didn’t break like they do on the telly; I just awoke with pains in the middle of the night.

And when I looked at Xavier, I thought he had become a stranger. I will never forgive myself for that.

When I woke Mum, she wailed: ‘We’re not ready; John Lewis haven’t delivered!’ But my baby was waiting for no one.

After fewer than ten hours of labour, Xavier was born. He was laid straight on my chest and when I looked at him, it was love at first sight.

The next few days were a lovely blur. Everyone congratulated me on having such a beautiful baby with his dark hair and almond eyes. He looked like my younger brother, Thom, 34.

I learned to breastfeed, I changed my first nappy, I bathed him. We were surrounded by cards, flowers, teddy bears and love.

We soon settled into a routine, taking long walks in the countryside or to the beach. It was idyllic.

We were a unit — not a conventional one, admittedly, but we were lucky to have each other. Everything seemed to be progressing normally.

Then, the week before Christmas I took Xavier to the clinic to be weighed and one of the health visitors was concerned he looked a bit jaundiced.

I took him to the GP, who recommended Xavier had tests. It was then discovered that he had an abnormal thyroid and liver function.

We traipsed to North Devon Hospital near Barnstaple on Boxing Day, but I had no idea what to expect. That’s when the consultant fired the first warning shot: ‘We need to test him for Down’s syndrome.’

The world stopped still. I couldn’t make sense of it; surely we would’ve known about that by now? I later learned abnormal thyroid and liver function can be a Down’s indicator.

Faith with Xavier and husband Ian at home in Devon. She said she left deflated by internet scare stories

The next few days were horrendous. My GP didn’t think that he could have Down’s. The health visitors were also surprised. And a midwife told me that there was no way Xavier could have Down’s syndrome because he breastfed, and babies with Down’s couldn’t do that.

Even the consultant seemed to backtrack from his initial warning: ‘Normally I’m 70 to 80 per cent sure but in Xavier’s case, I’m 50/50.’ I clutched at that hope tightly.

Five days later, all hope evaporated as I was told the tests had come back positive. I cried tears that never seemed to end.

And when I looked at Xavier, I thought he had become a stranger. I will never forgive myself for that.

There were moments when I studied him, trying to see the Down’s syndrome that had apparently always been there. But I couldn’t spot it; the ‘tell-tale’ almond eyes were so like my brother’s that it just looked like a family resemblance.

The consultant later explained that this is why the diagnosis had come so late. Apart from the slanted eyes, Xavier didn’t have many of the physical pointers they looked for — such as a small nose and mouth, low birth weight, weak muscle tone and just one crease on the palm of the hand. It wasn’t just me who couldn’t see it.

‘I can’t cope with a day of not knowing where my son is!’ I gasped.

‘Then you can do it,’ she said and I knew then that I could. That evening as I fed Xavier, I looked into his eyes, and he looked into mine. ‘I do know you,’ I thought.

Most children are diagnosed with Down’s syndrome immediately after birth, but although Xavier’s late diagnosis was unusual, it’s not unheard of: when I spoke to the Down’s Syndrome Association, they told me of one child who wasn’t diagnosed until the age of two.

I hadn’t been offered an amniocentesis because an initial blood test came back as low risk for Down’s. Had I discovered then what was likely to happen, in all honesty, I would have been highly likely to terminate.

I was a single mother, after all, and knew very little about the syndrome. Admitting that makes me feel physically sick because now I cannot imagine a life without Xavier.

Over the next few days there was a deluge of self-appointed experts. Each one armed with yet another new fact about my son, delivered with an encouraging smile, of course.

‘He’ll get special shoes.’

‘He’ll learn sign language.’

‘There’s a little girl with Down’s at the village school. She eats paint but that’s OK.’

On and on it went, and with each sentence I felt more defeated.

The internet proved even worse: we could look forward to all sorts of health problems, a long list of things he wouldn’t be able to do, and a fairly early death. I fell into a black hole. This was the blackest, deepest hole ever. I didn’t know how to climb out.

I was grieving for my child; I was angry, shattered, lost and helpless.

Meanwhile, Xavier was blissfully unaware. He slept, he ate, he smiled, and he even laughed.

Five days later, I told my midwife I couldn’t do it. She said simply: ‘You could always have Xavier adopted.’

Suddenly, I was jolted into remembering who I was, who my son was.

The writer said she has learned so much about herself from her young son

The visceral panic at the thought of losing him outweighed the anxiety of the previous few days. ‘I can’t cope with a day of not knowing where my son is!’ I gasped.

‘Then you can do it,’ she said and I knew then that I could. That evening as I fed Xavier, I looked into his eyes, and he looked into mine. ‘I do know you,’ I thought.

He was still the baby I’d carried for nine months, given birth to and nurtured. He hadn’t changed.

There and then I decided no matter what anyone said to me, I wouldn’t let them dictate his future. I would learn to trust my instincts rather than the scare stories. Most of all I would trust and be led by my son.

Every day, I learn more about him and myself. He inspires and educates me. More importantly, he has shown me how to love and how to trust

Already he’d taught me a lot about himself. He had breastfed well, he’d slept well and he had giggled a lot. Also he had already turned over from his tummy to his back, which was early for a baby to be doing that.

When Xavier was three months old, I braved the internet again and found Brainwave, a charity that works with children, whatever their condition or disability, to help them reach their full potential. They focus on what children can do, not what they can’t.

I took Xavier to the Bridgwater branch of the charity in Somerset when he was six months and it was like being wrapped in a cashmere blanket of reassurance.

To this day, they are one of my main sources of support.

They gave us a special programme of physical and cognitive therapy, which helped Xavier develop well.

He sat up at seven months, crawled at nine months and was walking at two years old — and didn’t need special shoes, by the way. By three, he was swimming without any armbands.

It’s hard and exhausting at times; a continual battle against outmoded preconceptions.

When strangers say things like: ‘They’re very loving, aren’t they?’ or ‘They’re special aren’t they?’ I want to scream at them: ‘Who are they?’ My son is not a ‘they’, no one is.

But I am very determined. Of course, I know Xavier will face extra hurdles, but we will tackle them together. I’m also certain he will have talents and it’s my job to nurture those.

Xavier is now four-and-a -half. He is a fantastically gorgeous little boy, who runs everywhere, enjoys swimming, loves Thomas The Tank Engine, is potty trained but refuses to dress himself if he can get someone else to do it.

Xavier goes to a mainstream school but does have some developmental differences

He attends a mainstream pre-school in North Devon, where he’s popular with the ladies, and has a ‘treat them mean, keep them keen’ mentality. By this I mean he ignores them, so he has a string of four-year-old girls waiting on him hand and foot.

Although there is nothing Xavier can’t do, there are developmental differences: he is a late talker and does have slightly lower muscle tone. He also takes thyroid medication daily, although none of this stops him from living life like most children his age.

Every day, I learn more about him and myself. He inspires and educates me. He gave me the confidence to write my latest book, Happily Ever After, about my pregnancy and our first year together.

More importantly, he has shown me how to love and how to trust.

A year-and-a-half ago I met Iain, a local carpenter and the brother of a friend while out for birthday drinks. Instead of pushing him away like previous dates, I let him into our lives.

We married in February and he and Xavier have a wonderful relationship. Being able to give Xavier the family he deserves has been amazing.

I realise I have no real idea of what the future holds for Xavier. Only that I’ll never allow him to be written off, dehumanised, or labelled.

No, he is Xavier: a fun, unique, creative, difficult, sometimes rather stubborn little boy who makes my heart smile. I feel truly lucky that I was somehow chosen to be his mummy.

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