#alcoholic sniper | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

cheebuss · 2 months

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he's drinking coopers fyi for my fellow australian mutuals... yuckayyy

#// alcohol #cheez rambles #my art #fanart #fandom character #team fortress 2 #tf2 sniper #sniper tf2 #// i dont like ur animal baz!! wtf!!#// he smells sooo baed.....

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queensqueercourt · 1 year

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sighs trudges over to a whiteboard labeled "days since drawing the TF2 mercs with their tits out" wipes the number away and writes zero

#art(mine)#tf2 #team fortress 2 #sniper #tf2 sniper #smoking cw #alcohol cw

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averageludwig · 23 days

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The mercs would get stuck on an island and Soldier's first thought is which of them he will eat first (he gets a little hungry and heavy is getting pounced)

#averitext #Demo and engie building a boat #not before demo has a mental and physical breakdown over no alcohol first #scout is getting lost two minutes in #spy probably has some communication device in his teeth actually #sniper will start treating this shit like a vacation #camping yey! (^.^)

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gingerale13 · 3 months

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MORE pen doodles -- bar edition

Scout on the right drawn by @ivvyzzspark

#tf2 #tf2 sniper #doodles #tf2 scout #ale13art #traditional art #swordvan #if you squint #alcohol #drinking #tf2 miss pauling #blu scout #bonk punch #team fortress 2 #I drew this while at a bar and the live music was so banger you have no idea

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the-hydroxian-artblog · 1 year

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this man is 40-something year-old disaster and canon can’t tell me otherwise

#Fang the Sniper #sth #sonic the hedgehog #drug and alcohol use

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artoatsblog · 1 month

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Obligatory TF2 job swap au

Dell the scout- A living cartoon character, wears roller skates, has a stretchy arm that was given to him by Mick and sure he had to get his hand cut off but we all have to make sacrifices, thinks he's smarter than you and is probably, goes through a bunch of "rabbit season/duck season" type beats daily.

Jeremy the soldier- A military brat who's never been in the military, he can't feel pain and got his legs blown off by rocket jumping but he got over it.

Jane doe the pyro- Everyone thinks they're a mindless killing machine and there right, can't talk just growls and barks, very animal like (especially dog like!) in general, he was made to be Marasmus's familiar but ran away.

??? the spy- Their gender place of origin name and even their face are completely unknown to everyone by design as per usual, he still sees everything in pyrovision (or spyvision if you prefer) she knows that's not how everyone else sees the world but they can't tell a psychiatrist because that will reveal something about him self and "make her vulnerable", friends with soldier :) spy loves how useful his big dumb puppy is and Jane thinks spy is nice :) the only reason some of the Mercs know Jane's name is because Jane managed to mumble it out to spy.

Sebastian the medic- Squidward core, hates his job, he isn't as dangerous as the og medic But somehow manages to still get a lot of medical malpractice in just because he simply does not care, puts organs in the wrong places and uses the wrong type constantly, he's still Jeremy's father but he's not going to tell him that lol.

Ludwig the heavy- Vary deranged yet nice, in love with demo and he does the most gory love letters ever created which demo is simultaneously horrified and strangely appreciative of, gets all the animal parts for medic.

Mikhail the demo- The only person here who has common sense despite his intense love for vodka, only got this job to support his family but that doesn't mean he can't love it, his relationship with heavy can be accurately described as "What is wrong with him and why do I need him."

Travis the sniper- Considered a failure by his family and they don't talk to each other because he doesn't work with explosives, thinks animals are better than people his only human friend is Jane because Jane is more animal than human anyway.

Mick the engineer- Got rid of both of his legs to replace them with sentries, looks calm and sensible but he isn't trust me, still lives in a van because he doesn't want to talk with anyone, also still throws jarate at people because he's Mick muddy.

#tw alcohol mention #team fortress 2 #tf2 au #tf2 swap au #tf2 #tf2 soldier #tf2 medic #tf2 scout #tf2 pyro #tf2 engineer #tf2 spy #tf2 sniper #tf2 heavy #tf2 demoman

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kombucha-enjoyer · 6 months

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once again a sketch that i colored with my finger!! (inspired by the little girl gone by chinchilla, idk i think it suits her)

and. homosexuals

look!!! a rare pair!!!!! btw i dont really like how demo and spy came out but oh well

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tf2-oneshots · 10 months

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Heavy and Medic experience the magical power of WEED. They also get drunk. So, in other words, Get high, do gay sex. Take that however you want.

Holy fuck…weed yaoi

Warnings: alcohol, weed

Rating: teen and up

Sniper takes out a small batch of brownies from the oven, sliding the metal tray onto the stove. Oven mittens removed, he uses one to fan them. While they cool, he leans against the counter to wait. The batch isn’t a normal one. These are pot brownies, and he’ll be damned if someone steals from him.

Elbows on the counter, the bushman miscalculates and accidentally hits the hot tray. He hisses, yanking the arm away from it. Sniper looks at the spot where a nasty burn forms. He runs it under cold water in the sink, but it remains.

“Piss…” A glance to the brownies. He can sneak off just for a few minutes, right? They’re still too hot for anyone to eat. He’ll pop into Medic’s office, get fixed up, and come right back. Simple as that.

Huffing, Sniper leaves the kitchen in search of the German doctor. Right as he passes through the left doorway, Medic enters with Heavy from the right. The sweet smell of brownies wafting through the air vents made it all the way to the common room they were just sitting in.

“Ohoho! They look delicious.” Medic takes a whiff, grinning at the delectable brownies just laying out in the kitchen. Pyro must have made the batch. On occasion, they leave cupcakes or cookies by the stove for the team to enjoy.

Heavy takes out a knife, carefully cutting the tray into even squares. On a plate, he gives himself a corner piece and Medic a center piece. The doctor also grabs them a few beers from their fridge, and the two retreat to Heavy’s bedroom. As they sink their teeth into the thick chocolate, the two are blissfully unaware of the side effects yet to come.

Half an hour later, everything kicks in.

“Misha…this isn’t my room.” Spread eagle on the bedroom floor, Medic stares wide eyed at the ceiling. He blinks, brain fuzzy from alcohol and marijuana. The older man sits upright, frantically turning his head left and right. Where are his birds? The skeleton display he keeps by the door? His blanket—where’s that damn blanket he bought while fleeing Germany?!

“Is…my room.” Comes the answer from the bed. Medic gasps, climbing up to see Heavy barely keeping his eyes open. The giant groans from the shift. Where the hell is his voice? It feels like his tongue was replaced with a brick.

Medic grips the bed, practically clinging to the frame for dear life. He presses tightly to the sheets, heart racing. Is this a heart attack? Dear god, it is! Why is he having a heart attack? Is he going to die?

“Misha, Misha! I’m floating!” Despite the claim, Medic remains firmly on the ground. He then attempts to shove himself under the bed to keep himself from becoming airborne. While these antics occur, Heavy begins laughing.

“Doktor…Doktor is on ground!” A wheeze. When has he ever wheezed? Heavy laughs harder as Medic scrambles for purchase, fighting whatever force has him convinced that he’s floating away. It actually sounds pretty nice when Heavy thinks about it. Just drifting aimlessly through the clouds…

“Don’t laugh! I can’t feel my legs!” Where are they?! Medic looks under the bed, yanking a pant leg to confirm that his legs are in fact attached to himself. Something is trying to take his legs, isn’t it? Before he can kick at the air, the Russian drags the doctor out from under the bed and into his arms.

“Hm….Heavy keep Doktor safe.” Its like being cuddled by a bear. A really, really high bear that’s also a little drunk. Heavy reaches for his half empty beer, enjoying the warmth it sends through his body. Beer is so nice. Why can’t it taste this way all the time?

“Are we having sex?” He feels like jelly, or maybe a pudding of sorts. Medic clings to his lover to make sure that he isn’t actually turning to pudding. Maybe this is just a really slow, fully clothed version of sex. Feels nice. That is, until the door opens.

“Knew it. Damnit, you two ate weed brownies.” Medic flounders, fighting to cover himself despite being fully dressed. Heavy laughs loudly, accidentally rolling off the bed and crushing Medic. The loud scream from his smaller lover is cut off by his massive chest muffling the man.

“You’ll be fine by tomorrow. Drink some bloody water and stay the hell away from my edibles.” The door slams shut as Sniper marches away. He returns to the kitchen only to see two more squares taken out from the tray. Wankers.

#team fortress 2 #tf2 #tf2 requests #tf2 medic #tf2 heavy #tf2 sniper #red oktoberfest #heavymedic #weed mention #alcohol mention

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spysflatass · 11 months

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what pressies the other mercs would get medic because its his bday!!

also cause im done with collage now yippee yippee!!

heavy: food for archimedies, new gloves and boots, a book on old timey medicine, a love letter and extra snuggles :)

demo and sniper: see, the difference between these two is that sniper just got him a generic beer but i think demo would find a really specific wine, and like dose calculations on wines medic already drinks to find the perfect new one (snipers usally too far away from any shop he can use and beer is always appreciated)

spy: cufflinks or masc perfume. its the expensive kind though so it smells weird but still nice.

engie: new tools that were ment for like construction but next week hes getting healed with them. so long as they get used hey?

pyro: lots of different plasters with like unicorns and hello kitty and superheros on them

soldier: lots of old comics that he found and a museum gift shop gift (think like a mount rushmore trinket)

scout: he panicked and brought socks with weenie dogs on them and is surprised when medic still like them (medic has that old man mindset where he goes buckwild for new socks)

miss pauling: a new sweater with a cow on it (he also gets ecstatic over new sweaters) and a new type of instant coffee

bonus two!! :

the devil: (look he has to get his ex something)

me: jars to store the organs he gets in!!

#docs orders #cw alcohol #tf2 #tf2 medic #heavy tf2 #teamfortress2 #tf2 fandom #tf2 demoman #tf2 scout #tf2 sniper #engineer tf2 #tf2 miss pauling #tf2 pyro #tf2 spy #soldier tf2 #tf2 devil #tf2 self insert #teehee #happy b day medic!!

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emotionally-alive-sniper · 8 months

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o i thjmk k mightve had. ,one t oo many

#tw alcohol #emotionally xyz mercs #emotionally alive sniper #snipin' nest #open rp

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cacklefrendly · 3 months

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Black Organization merch idea: liquid keychains shaped like shotglasses and wine glasses. little iddy biddy assassins inside. shake them.

#cackle rants #detective conan #could also stick some little props in there w them #sniper rounds n swallowtail butterflies in a Chianti glass.......#n of COURSE you'd design different cups to fit the alcohol. obviously

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queensqueercourt · 1 year

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only people who are immune to sniper's family moonshine are 1. sniper (tolerance) and 2. scout (drank enough bonk to the point his stomach can digest and break down metal)

#art(mine)#tf2 #team fortress two #scout #sniper #sniperscout #speeding bullet #tf2 scout #tf2 sniper #alcohol cw #ask to tag

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hearties-circus · 1 year

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