#QuiMace | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

phoenixyfriend · 2 years

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HECK my brain has provided a Silly AU

Okay, explanation: Saw a promo photo for AotC. Brain connected some dots. Rotated. Connected other dots. Now I have a weird net.

Background before moving forward: For most modern AUs, the pattern I follow for the disaster lineage main line is:

Feemor and Xanatos were Qui-Gon's mentees (college stuff), not his kids. One ended well. The other did not.

Obi-Wan was the result of a Bad Decision (likely alcohol, but could be a longer relationship). The bio mom is not in the picture, but Qui-Gon's doing his best with this kid.

First marriage was when Obi-Wan was still a toddler, to Tahl. Tahl dies when Obi-Wan is about 15/16. Qui-Gon deals poorly. This involves some ill-advised one-night stands.

About ten years later, one of said one-night stands calls him up with "I meant to be a single mother and not involve you, because all I had was the business card you left, but I've been having some health troubles and I need to know that Anakin has somewhere to go if something happens to me." Qui-Gon ends up with another kid. Obi-Wan and Anakin are half-brothers.

Okay now for the actual AU.

We give Anakin a reason to be transferred mostly to Qui-Gon. Maybe Shmi's health took a turn for the worse, maybe she died, maybe they decided Anakin would have better schooling if he was living with Qui-Gon, whatever. Point is mostly that Anakin is living with Qui-Gon (the dad he likes but only sort-of knows) and Obi-Wan (the half-brother he adores but doesn't see much of because Obi-Wan is in grad school).

And then Qui-Gon remarries.

To Mace.

And the entire point of all this is that I want Anakin's stepdad on this side to be Mace Windu and imagine the Various Nonsenses that may come about.

They have a very big house because Qui-Gon is Dooku's firstborn and is inheriting the Countship.

(Rael can't inherit because he's the only heir to a different title and he can't hold both at the same time.)

Anakin reading books about Evil Stepmothers and trying to figure out if he should be watching Mace for Important Signs.

Does it count if it's a stepdad? Are the books an accurate representation of the proper signs to watch out for?

My favorite QuiMace dynamic is Qui-Gon deliberately, constantly toeing the line of irritation to Mace. And Mace is just incredibly flat-faced about it at all times. People think they're just. Coworkers at best. And then Qui-Gon manages something extra ridiculous and earns himself a smile and a peck on the cheek and everyone's just like WAIT. WHAT. It's like. Qui-Gon embodies this constant, slightly smug, needling grin where he knows exactly how far he can push, and Mace is charmed by this against his better judgement.

Mace has to drive Anakin to school sometimes and there's just this. Kid. In the passenger seat. Staring at him. The only request he ever gets from the kid is to go Fast. It happens once. He says no. Anakin doesn't ask again, just. Stares at him.

Mace knows the kid isn't possessed but he sure as hell feels like it sometimes; he wants to endear himself to his stepkid, but said stepkids spends half his time staring suspiciously at him from around corners for no reason.

I am envisioning this all taking place in like. This egregiously old and fancy mansion in the Scottish Highlands or something. All those painfully upper crust carved dark wood stair rails and whatnot. The tropey kind.

Qui-Gon decides Mace and Ani should try to Bonding Exercise. Sets them up in an escape room. Mace turns to read the instructions and turns around to find Anakin trying to unscrew the door from the wall because That's One Way To Win, Right? It's Not Against The Rules. He's not trying to escape for anxiety reasons or anything, this is just the fastest way to Win, and boy does Anakin love winning.

Qui-Gon goes off to a botany conference so the house is just Mace and Anakin (and staff, but half the building is a living museum because Qui-Gon doesn't like Rich Life, so that's not actually anything that involves them), and it's. The most awkward thing.

Obi-Wan and Mace get along well. Obi-Wan and Depa (Mace's adopted daughter) get along great. It's just Anakin being so gosh darn weird.

The acceptance phase with this child involves climbing. Anakin is climbing his stepdad to reach Things Up High before he actually talks to him like a Fellow Human Being.

Anakin climbs Qui-Gon to reach high things all the time so Mace figures it's a good sign. It's just also annoying because now he has to change his shirt since there's a child-sized footprint on it.

(Ironically, Anakin adores Depa. She can cook better than anyone else in this family, except Mom and that Dooku guy that's apparently Grandpa)

(Granted I can also very easily imagine this as not-manor life, but like. random suburb.)

@epicmusic42 (Wren) pointed out:

The manor is important bc it gives ambiance to Anakin's suspicion. Could also have a b-plot where depa and obi are investigating what they think might be a murder? They're not sure and they're not letting anakin join bc they're terrified they'll be right and find a dead body komari stashed in the walls 20 years ago

Mace, rubbing his temples: She's alive and living on Cypress. We can video call her.

Obi-Wan and Mace get along well. Obi-Wan and Depa get along great. It's just Anakin being so gosh darn weird.

The acceptance phase with this child involves climbing. Anakin is climbing his stepdad to reach Things Up High before he actually talks to him like a Fellow Human Being.

Anakin climbs Qui-Gon to reach high things all the time so Mace figures it's a good sign. It's just also annoying because now he has to change his shirt since there's a child-sized footprint on it.

(Ironically, Anakin adores Depa. She can cook better than anyone else in this family, except Mom and that Dooku guy that's apparently Grandpa)

The idea of Depa and Obi-Wan furiously whispering about Weird Ghost Things in a corner while Anakin is pretending to be otherwise occupied is killing me.

He's got on noise cancelling headphones. They are not on. He is listening very intently to his Grown Up Siblings.

He's going to crawl into the vents and find the ghost Mace finds him half-way inside a vent he removed himself and just. Pulls him out. What the fuck fudge, kid?

Wren:

Mace: [considers his daughter. Considers everything he knows Obi-wan. Considers that this is Qui-Gon’s kid] Mace, resigned: ...does this have anything to do with depa and Obi-wan’s idea that there's a ghost? Anakin: ...maybe

I need Anakin to have a nightmare and he tries to find Qui-Gon but Mace is already awake and decides to Make Some Hot Chocolate.

Groundskeeper Plo and his granddaughter Ahsoka.

Shaak is Plo's daughter-in-law and Ahsoka's mom. She spends most of her time working in the neonatal ward of the nearest hospital, so she leaves Ahsoka with Plo a lot.

This toddler has decided Anakin is her favorite person EVER.

Wren:

plo might have planted some odd evidence to help Mace bond w anakin over a mystery. Whether that's still what depa and obi are investigating tho...

Plo has a pilot's license and Anakin spends so much time asking him about it

Anakin keeps trying to get into the antique swords Mace would tear his hair out if he had any

Wren:

Mace: help? Qui? Qui: Ani, the same rule applies to you as it did to the rest of our family. You have to beat father in a duel before you can touch his collection Whether or not it works depends entirely on whether it's Dooku's swords Anakin is trying to access Mace is concerned by this is until Qui-Gon points out that his father did go to the Olympics. Several times in fact.

Anakin's upset because he can't beat Dooku in a duel when Dooku's on some wine tour in Italy and won't be coming back until all the court cases are over.

There's a fic (by @willowcrowned) where Dooku is Ventress's fencing coach to get her to the Olympics and I like that option (She's going in the will and everyone knows it.)

Glorious! Could drive the chaos up even more by interrupting Mace's progress w anakin, w dooku coming home w ventress in tow, actually. The only explanation he'll give is that she's staying and to treat her like family. Everyone is Concerned

You know those comics where Dick Grayson is like. Swinging on the chandelier and scaring the shit out of Bruce and Alfred? That's Anakin.

Qui-Gon is relatively responsible and tells Anakin that he can sign up for a gymnastics class if he'd like, but he's not swinging from the chandelier without safety equipment. That's How Your Uncle Rael Broke His Leg, You Know. Unfortunately, he's still too chill about it for Mace's blood pressure.

Also, I decided that if I ever do anything with this, it's QuinObi.

I think Mace and Tholme would make for very saltmate in-laws (and hey, we could do the Plo thing!), but also Quinlan would probably enjoy winding up his future step-father-in-law just as much as Qui-Gon does.

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masterofthelivingforce · 6 years

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Masterpost of threads

With @thewanderingsoul (Rey)

Lost and found on Jakku - Rey finds a Force artifact. Qui-Gon feels her from the Force and comes back as a ghost to investigate the disturbance.

Tiny Lost Child - Padawan!AU Rey is 6, Qui-Gon is 26. Their first meeting is fated by the Force. [finished]

A new Padawan for Qui-Gon: One year after he Knighted Feemor, Qui-Gon is looking for a new Padawan - and of course, he wants Rey.

Teasing a Jedi - Padawan!AU Set two years after Rey was knighted. Sexy times happens. (Qui-Rey)

A dept paid in blood: Mordern au. The Vampire AU nobody asked for but that I desperately needed.

With @mcsterskywclker (Luke)

A new Jedi - Luke explores the temple of Alaris Prime, Qui-Gon appears to guide him. [ended]

Stranded planetside - Qui-Gon keeps Luke company as he fixes his X-wing [abandoned]

With @brokenspaceprince (Kylo Ren)

You’ll never be free from me - Qui-Gon is sent to keep an eye on Kylo Ren. Kylo is thrilled. Can ghosts be murdered? [ended]

A new Master in an old time - Ben Solo travels back in time, to a Gray Jedi who might show him a different path.

With @bencannolikenobi (Obi-Wan)

The timeline’s all wrong - When Qui-Gon dies, he rejoins the Force… Only to wake up twelve years later. General Kenobi is shocked to meet his Master anew. (QuiObi)

Hoodie for the feckless - Modern!AU Obi-Wan is out in the cold with only a t-shirt. Qui-Gon offers him his hoodie. (QuiObi)

To be young again - Obi-Wan is deaged to a toddler. Qui-Gon is defeated by the cute. [ended]

Frip him hard: Shameless smut. Qui-Gon has been away on a long mission and Obi-Wan is thirsty. (QuiObi)

With @beststarpilot (Anakin)

The long path to Knighthood - Anakin is Qui-Gon’s Padawan. As much as he likes his Master, he’s eager to become a Knight. [ended]

With @nieithryn (Mace Windu)

Flirting with danger - Qui-Gon and Mace space. The battlelust becomes simpler lust. NSFW. (QuiMace)

With @thesarcasmofasoldier (Obi-Wan)

Young and wild - Wereanimals!AU Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan are both from Stewjon, but the first is a lion, the second is a coguar. Qui-Gon is assigned Obi-Wan as his Padawan to teach him to control his animal side. It’s a rocky start.

Valentine confession: On Valentine’s Day, Obi-Wan has the courage to confess his love for his Master. (QuiObi)

With @onlyhopc (Obi-Wan)

It goes on - Qui-Gon doesn’t die on Naboo, and wakes up to face his mistakes and his feelings.

The Fall: On Apsolon, Obi-Wan is too late. Qui-Gon kills Tahl’s murderer in hate, and steps into the Darkness.

With @therapardalis (Thera Pardalis)

King and Lionheart verse:

A Jedi lost in outer space - Qui-Gon finds himself stranded on a Force-forgotten planet in the Outer Rim. Seems like Captain Pardalis is his only way out of there. (October)

Oh no she’s hot: Qui-Gon looks at Thera Pardalis and has naughty thoughts. (November)

Tahl and Micah are too noisy (My drabble, January)

How to fail and the sequel - Qui-Gon is oblivious and he makes a fool out of himself. Things could turn out right for him and Thera in the end, though. NSFW (February)

Why can’t people just shut up already (Panth’s drabble, March)

Movie night - Thera is a damn tease, and she knows it. Shameless NSFW. (March)

A chat between friends - Qui-Gon and Thera talk of attachment and unsolved issues. (April)

Modesty what’s that: Qui-Gon returns exhausted from a mission, and Thera pampers him. (April)

Master of bad choices: Qui-Gon has a fallout with the Council and seeks comfort in Thera’s arms. (May)

Thera deals with the fragility of life (Panth’s drabble, May)

Happy Birthday Thera!: It’s Thera’s birthday, and Qui-Gon gifts her with a lightsaber. (June)

Meeting a star: Their favourite actor, Ha’at Boi, is in trouble, and the Jedi send them to help him. Happy coincidence? (July)

Sparring is showing off: Ha’at asked to see Qui-Gon and Thera spar.

Night at the premiere: Thera and Qui-Gon are invited to the premiere of Ha’at’s movie

A thoughtful gift: Micah gives Qui-Gon glow-in-the-dark condoms. What are Qui-Gon and Thera to do but they them? NSFW

One more dance - After a successful mission on Darla, a ball is announced. Qui-Gon is invited, and he asks Thera to be his plus one. (August)

Vacation on Scarif: exactly what it says on the tin.

Valentine’s day: Qui-Gon is so cheesy. I can’t.

I’m not calling you a liar: one of Qui-Gon’s old lovers appears with a baby, saying that the child is his. Things go south fast.

Thera’s Life Day gift to Qui-Gon

Qui-Gon’s Life Day gift to Thera

Other AUs:

A difficult night - Qui-Gon goes to a bar to drink his heartbreak away. Thera is there to play babysitter and counselor. [finished]

In time of crisis - Thera really tried to be ok with an open relationship, but she hit her limit.

Of lions and men: Gladiator!Au where Quinn is a werelion and Thera came to free the lions from the Colosseum.

Fauns in space: Qui-Gon is a faun with a streak of very bad luck.

With @negotiator-kenobi (Obi-Wan)

In your skin - Soulmate AU where what you write appears on your soulmate’s skin (QuiObi).

Equivalent Exchange - Qui-Gon is dying, but Obi-Wan is given a choice by the Force: be able to heal his Master, but lose him anyway, because Qui-Gon will forget about him. Obi-Wan accepts. (QuiObi)

Adventures in dating - the fake dating AU everyone needs. (QuiObi)

Give me some sugar: Sugar Daddy AU. Qui-Gon feel lonely and Obi-Wan has a little brother to care for.

With @thezabrakassassin (Maul)

Of learning and manipulation - Maul survives Naboo and is brought back to the Temple for interrogation. Qui-Gon wants to learn all he can about the Sith, but there’s always a price.

From ashes of hate: Maul was rescued as a kid and became a Jedi, Qui-Gon fell after Tahl’s death. Sith and Jedi meet, and they’re more alike than they would have expected.

With @theironlyhxpe (Obi-Wan)

Of past and future: Timetravel AU: A Sith artifact unwittingly activated by Obi-Wan and Anakin brings back a 25 years old Qui-Gon. Ansgt and smut happens. (QuiObi)

Unexpected confession: Qui-Gon brings up his feelings for Obi-Wan in an unexpected way. [finished] (QuiObi)

The first touch: Sequel to Unexpected Confession, the first time QUi-Gon and Obi-Wan are intimate.(QuiObi)

Birthday boy: it’s Qui-Gon’s 70th birthday, and Obi-Wan decides to make it a good day.(QuiObi)

With @darksidewalker (Anakin)

First date: It’s Valentine’s day, and Qui-Gon asks Anakin out on a date. (Quikin)

Flowers and weeds: It’s Valentine’s Day, and Anakin gives Qui-Gon a flower. How can he not return the favour by taking him to his greenhouse? (Quikin)

A big start:shameless smut. (Quikin)

With @lcstjedii (Rey)

Maybe too much aggression: (AU) Rey is a youngling at the Temple, but everyone says she’s too reckless, to angry. Qui-Gon sets out to discover why.

With @obiwankeno-bae (Obi-Wan)

to be tagged

With @galaxyofmisguidedstars (Dooku)

Sithly beginnings: Tahl’s death and his thrist for vengeace made Qui-Gon Fall hard. Trying to come to terms with his new identity in the Dark, he seeks out his former Master, in need of council.

With @stillsalvaging (Rey)

An old ghost: Rey reads the ancient Jedi text, looking for anwers - what she gets is a guide.

With @shieldshawk (Clint Barton)

Underground City: Qui-Gon needs a guide to navigate an undeground city. Clint just so happens to need money.

Oh look a shiny: (Marvel AU) Sorcerers don’t interfer with earthy business - unless the dimensions are at risk. Quinn does his duty, but that puts him in SHIELD’s path...

With @partialparseltongue (Harry Potter)

The herbology professor: (Hogwarts AU) Quinn was hired to teach one year at Hogawarts, and gets to know Harry Potter - and look, he’s adopted a new stray.

Haunted greenhouses: Harry Potter died in the summer of his fifth year. Professor St. John finds a ghost in his greenhouse.

With @astrawalk (Thor)

A god far away from home: Thor is catapulted by the Bifrost into a new Galaxy. Qui-Gon always had the bad habit of picking up strays, so...

With @justastarkgenius (Tony Stark)

Magic and iron come together: After IW, Tony Stark has taken to checking in on Stephen Strange. One day he meets Quinn St. John instead.

With @ariadne-inthesky (Ariadne)

A woman not to be trusted - Ariadne is an explorer who specializes in finding lost artifacts. Qui-Gon just so needs an artifact to be found.

A beating heart of stone - AU where Ariadne’s family wants to marry her off. Qui-Gon accepts to marry her to save her from that and oh no look they’re in love now.

With @keeperoftheliars (Asha)

The Mandalorian ways - Death Watch tries the diplomatic route... Except that the Order sent Qui-Gon Jinn, who knows the Mandalorian well. Asha is not going to have an easy time with him.

#threads #one day i will clear the dead ones #i swear

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