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justanothercinemaniac · 7 years

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Epic Movie (Re)Watch #191 - 20,000 Leagues Under The Sea (1954)

Spoilers Below

Have I seen it before: Yes

Did I like it then: I think so.

Do I remember it: More or less.

Did I see it in theaters: No.

Format: DVD

1) According to IMDb:

Richard Fleischer was surprised at being considered for the director's chair for this film, as he was the son of Disney's biggest competitor, Max Fleischer. He approached Walt Disney to inquire if Disney knew who he was. Disney told him that he was well aware of who he was and hired him because he thought he was the best man for the job. Richard Fleischer also asked his father if he minded having his son working for his rival but Max Fleischer made no objection and even asked Richard to tell Disney that he thought he had made an excellent choice for his director!

Just some fun trivia to start with.

2) This film’s brief opening explosion does quite well to establish the danger of the seas and some of the film’s stakes.

3) Kirk Douglas as Ned Land.

Douglas plays land as a traditional roguish action hero in the best sense. He has this wonderful sense of humor and charm, playing a character who could’ve easily been a hated jackass as someone you like/root for. He’s lovably devious and just fun.

4) I know this movie is from 1954, but quite calling anything that you consider the east, “the orient!”

5) Paul Lukas as Professor Aronnax.

Lukas plays Aronnax as a remarkably patient and considerate character. You invest in him easily because he’s reasonable, curious, soft spoken, and just genuinely kind. The performance is what makes the character here and it’s great.

6) The film really takes advantage of its oceanic setting with brief moments of spectacle, featuring grand shots of dolphins and whales in real life. Although unfortunately this can come at the expense of pacing.

7) “A Whale of a Tale”

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While this song serves mainly as an extended distraction from the plot & an opportunity to let Kirk Douglas sing a song, it’s just incredibly fun too. It’s a classic of the Disney canon, appearing on Classic Disney: Vol. 1 (albeit with a different third verse), and even getting a reference in Finding Nemo. All in all, it’s just a standout moment of the film.

8) There’s a nice sense of tension in the skirmish between the ship and the “monster” before Ned, Aronnax, and Conseil (Aronnax’s assistant) fall into the water.

9) So, because it’s 2017 and I’m a sucker for gay ships, I head canon that Conseil is in love or has feeling for Aronnax. He jumps into the water without a second thought when the professor falls in and the entire time on the Nautilus he is very adamant about not leaving without the professor. It’s most likely intended as loyalty from an assistant to his professor, but my way is more fun.

10) The Nautilus.

(This is just concept art but it’s the best visual representation I could find.)

The wonder which the film gives the steam punk submarine upon simply realizing what it is helps make the vessel seem miraculous even in a world where submarines exist. The further exploration of the Nautilus helps establish a sense of place and geography to the vessel, while the visual design is also wildly imaginative/spectacular. This is all incredible important as the Nautilus is as important a character to the story as Nemo or Ned, in some ways more so. So the fact the film puts os much stock into the Nautilus just shows the filmmakers understand it.

11) James Mason as Captain Nemo.

Unfortunately Mason’s casting as the iconic character is part of a long line of Hollywood white washing, since in the source material Captain Nemo is the son of an Indian Raja. This effects some of how Nemo’s backstory comes across (who held him in slavery? Why? I don’t really get that part of the movie, just that he lost his family because of it), but Mason is very strong in the part. He breathes incredible complexity, intelligence, interest and power into the captain of the Nautilus. Which is important as Nemo is one of the most complicated and complex antiheroes every to appear in fiction. Within a few moments Mason is sable to establish that Nemo has these complexities, that there’s so much to him we don’t see, with just his performance.

Nemo is filled with contradictions. He makes a point about how he is not civilized but gives Ned a hard time for not using a fork. He criticizes Ned for going after treasure when Nemo has a whole closet full of it. And while he uses his pain to justify the murder of countless sailors to stop war from spreading, are they not as innocent as his family? I thought they didn’t know what they were carrying, but are instead the same people who we see getting whipped like Nemo once was a slave.

But more than anything else Mason is able to show us a lot of Nemo when he’s not speaking a word. We see his intense pain at times when playing the pipe organ and we understand just how deeply he loves the seas. How it calms him, how it is his paradise. While the whitewashing of the character is more than unfortunate, Mason still does a strong job in the part.

12) Nemo’s pipe organ can actually seen by the general public and not in a museum. It currently resides in Disneyland’s Haunted Mansion ride and has done so since 1969.

13) The hunting expedition sequence is another showcase of how the film will often place wonder over pacing. The scene is incredible, with visually compelling elements and unique action. The finding of the sunken treasure is especially nice, as is the ensuing shark attack. But it’s just so freaking slow.

14) Oh, professor…

Aronnax [about Ned]: “His life means nothing! Nor does mine or yours compared to what’s behind all this.”

I disagree, but whatever. i think I’m meant to.

15) I mentioned this before, but I don’t fully understand Nemo’s backstory. He calls the island prison a, “white man’s grave.” Does that mean this film is trying to tell us non-white people are kidnapping white men and using them as slaves? That’s a fucked up narrative device and makes me wonder (as someone who’s never read the book) how this all fits with Nemo’s original heritage.

16) When Arronax says Nemo is, “not only a murderer but a hypocrite,” that was when I learned what the word hypocrite means.

16.1) I would also like to point out taking life is always much easier than maintaining it. There was probably another solution to Nemo’s problem of war spreading other than killing sailors over and over again, but death is much easier.

17) Ah, the racist and outdated “dangerous natives” trope. Yeah, please let this die soon.

And these cannibals are the only fucking black people in the movie. And they’re all dudes, of course. The only two women in this movie were Ned’s girlfriends from before. This whole part of the movie just makes me sad.

18) The Nautilus sinking is actually an excellent example of stakes in the film. There is an incredible tension and pressure throughout where the slower pacing is actually beneficial.

19) THE GIANT SQUID!!!!

This is the best damn part of the entire film, honestly. The fight with the giant squid has become wildly iconic and brings an incredible sense of fun that is born out of incredible imagination. There is strong action, stakes, and pacing throughout. While the practical effects are crazy strong, especially for the time. 63 years later and you’re not pulled out of the scene. Kirk Douglas even gets a real action hero moment to shine when he kills the beast. All in all, it’s just great.

20)

Nemo [after Ned saves him from the squid]: “Mr Land, you saved my life. Why?”

Ned [after a beat]: “That’s a good question.”

21) Honestly the giant squid works as a better climax for the movie than Nemo blowing up his island based. It is the greatest moment of tension in the film, far more so than what we get on Volcania. HOWEVER, the ending on Volcania is a much more fitting emotional conclusion. This story could only have ended one way and that is with the death of Captain Nemo.

22) Oh thank god, they save the seal! I was worried about that.

23) Okay, so one final thought. Everyone is like, “we have to get off the Nautilus before the explosion of Volcania goes off and kills us all!” But then the island blows up and it’s nowhere near Nautilus.

While an unfortunate example of white washing and problematic handling of non-white characters, 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea is still in many ways a classic. It can drag at some points but Mason commands as Nemo, the design and imagination that went into the film is clear, there are a nice amount of fun moments, and then the giant squid is awesome! Especially if you’re a Disney fan, a fan of the book, or a sci-fi fan in general, you should watch this film. If you’re not those things you still might want to give this movie a try. See if you like it.

#20000 Leagues Under the Sea #Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea #James Mason #Kirk Douglas #Disney #Peter Lorre #Paul Lukas #Richard Fleischer #I Don't Get It #Epic Movie (Re)Watch #Movie #Film #GIF #The More You Know

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rocketshippingassbutt · 7 years

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So here’s my thoughts on pokeani theme songs that absolutely no one asked for

I freaking love music. Music is my life. Add that to the fact I’ve just finished watching through AG, and you end up with me prattling on about pokeani dub themes.

I wish I’d had the sense to do this after I finished OS. But I didn’t. So I’m combining OS and AG now.

Warning: long post...

POKEMON THEME (Indigo League)

Instant hit or grower? Instant, obviously! This will always be the quintessential pokemon theme, you ask me to sing pokemon, this is what you'll get.

Musicality: It's catchy, love the piano, can't help but dance to the guitars, great vocals and kick-ass harmony, it's really hard to try and sing the words AND the music at the same time. Love it! 10/10

Animation: MEW!! Pokemon in space! Everything fits to the beat, and matches the lyrics too. Points for Gary and Delia. 9/10

TR appearance: Once. 3 seconds. They look good though. Posing!! 5/10

Bonus points? It’s the original! 10/10

POKEMON WORLD (Orange Islands)

Instant hit or grower? Not a fan tbh, worst of OS.

Musicality: It is kinda catchy but that's the only thing going for it. That whole shout and reply thing (’so ya wanna be’… ‘number one’) annoys me. It feels like it's trying too hard. Nothing special musically, at all. Just nope. 2/10

Animation: Mandi!! We had a bit of a crush on him back in the day. And yay for Richie, and more Delia and Gary, and Duplica too. And Gio! Yay for Jigglypuff! Overall a lot more visually energetic than the last one. Plus pretty rainbow background makes Kel happy. 8/10

TR appearance: Once. 5 seconds. Cute posing plus comedy. 7/10

Bonus points? Bonus points because I love the 2nd movie so much. 5/10

POKEMON JOHTO (Johto Journeys)

Instant hit or grower? A grower. I hated it back in the day. But when I started my adult pokeani watch-thru I LOVED it! I think I only hated it way back because I was such a fan of gen 1 and the original theme.

Musicality: THOSE BACKING DO DO DOOO'S! GAH! It's so damn catchy and singable! Good harmonies too, not quite on the first one's level though. Fab beat, love the drums. 8/10

Animation: The twerp running sequence at the start and the way it fits with the music, I freaking love it! More Gary :D and Jigglypuff :D CHIKORITA! GET AWAY FROM ASH! Stupid chikorita trying to take Pikachu's place. It really bugged me during Johto. Yay, Mew's back, being all cute, and Lugia too :D 7/10

TR appearance: Once. 3 seconds. Cute sleepy rockets! 5/10

Bonus points? It will always remind me of one of my fave gishwhes items. 5/10

BORN TO BE WINNER (Johto League Champions)

Instant hit or grower? Instant, kinda. No, no, what are you doing? You can't do this! Stop destroying the original! You're sullying it! STOP! Wait, what's happening, holy… HOLY SHIT THIS IS AWESOME!! I LOVE THIS!!

Musicality: JFC when it kicks in at ‘my whole life’, it's incredible!! That fucking beat!! Those chords after ‘time to test my skills’ make me so happy inside. And that chord on ‘show the world’! This was the first one that I used to actually animatedly sing and dance and tap and clap to, every damn time. EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS SONG IS AMAZING! 10/10

Animation: Man, the twerps mean business at the start! Delia! And Tracey too! And reminds me so much of my fave movie with the Lugia stuff near the start. Entei! Mew's back for more too!! Don't really care for any of the gym leader cameos tbh. They haven't made as much effort to get the video synced perfectly to the audio as in previous ones, it seems a bit chaotic? 6/10

TR appearance: Once, 4 seconds, but really only 1 second close up. 2/10

Bonus points? HOLY FUCKING WOW AT THE SONG! 10/10

BELIEVE IN ME (Master Quest)

Instant hit or grower? We've just had a kick ass theme, and now we have another one??! Instant!!

Musicality: It's rocky, that bassline, rockin’ guitars, fab vocals. No harmony except the last line but I don't miss it, it works well without. Toe-tappingly good. 8/10

Animation: Back to making an effort to make everything fit to the beat, which is good. Yay for Gary, Richie and Casey! Those stairs remind me of the 3rd movie. Legendary dogs and birds, Lugia too. Awww Celebi!! 7/10

TR appearance: Twice!! 5 seconds in total. And both freaking awesome! The second one especially is one of my faves of the gang. 9/10

Bonus points? The song rocks. 8/10

I WANNA BE A HERO (Advanced)

Instant hit or grower? As much as I freaking love it now, it wasn't instant, but it was a quick grower. The chorus was an instant hit though.

Musicality: 'town' and 'learn' sound whiny and annoy me, I think that's why the verse wasn't instant. That beat is awesome tho. The wee bridge 'take a step' to 'again' - it's growing, it's growing... Chorus hits, and it's just YES!! That first line with the harmony, gah I always launch straight in to singing the harmony full blast. I can't help it. Plus the fact the music stops for that line makes it even more epic. That wee guitar bit behind 'pokemon advanced' I freaking love it! 8/10

Animation: It's fine, I don't love it, it's nothing special, lots of action, no cameos (apart from Aqua and Magma). Though bonus points for the very end with all the pretty colours. 6/10

TR appearance: Once. 2 seconds. But yay for James getting a hug from Cacnea. 4/10

Bonus points? Awesome song. 8/10

THIS DREAM (Advanced Challenge)

Instant hit or grower? It was a grower.

Musicality: A bit of a step down after I wanna be a hero, but still awesome. It lacks the singability and toe-tappiness of some but it's catchy enough. Great harmonies in the chorus. Every song ends with the usual 'pokemon' and this was the first where I thought the theme song didn't lead well in to it, it feels like it was just shoved on to the end with no through of the previous chords, and that annoyed me. 7/10

Animation: Starts with space and an aurora so bonus points right from the get go. I liked the appearance from the Kanto starter final evolutions. Pikachu is so damn cute sitting on Ash's knee on that hill. Watching it now I'm like Yay Drew!, but at the time I wasn't fussed, he was a grower lol. Medicham annoys me with that wee head thing. 8/10

TR appearance: Once. 2 seconds but blasting off so they're barely there. 3/10

Bonus points? Crotch shot (blink and you’ll miss it). 5/10

UNBEATABLE (Advanced Battle)

Instant hit or grower? FUCKING INSTANT!

Musicality: How freaking epic is this?!?! This wins the award for the pokemon theme sung most often by Kel. It was constantly in my head. In fact I used to sing from 'woah' to 'pokemon', point at hubby, who would roll his eyes before saying 'advanced battle' and I would cheer. Good times. Harmonies are fantastic. Guitars are fantastic. I can't help but air-drum at 'they'll never last'. That bassline!! What is not to like about this? It's brilliant!! 10/10

Animation: That whole things with Brock, Munchlax, May and Max shrugging, love it! I like the way Drew and Harley appeared behind May. Yay again for Celebi and the legendary dogs and birds. That wee nose rub Ash does, I don't know why but I adore it! DANCING TEAM ROCKET!!! Fucking Batman??! Yay for Delia and Tracey and Misty! Who even are those shadowy dudes in 'come to play - never last'? Good mix of action-packed vs funny, plus everything fits to the beat. 9/10

TR appearance: Twice! 5 seconds in total. DANCING! YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW MUCH I LOVE THIS! 9/10

Bonus points? EPIC SONG! Also, in case I hadn't already mentioned, DANCING TR! 10/10

BATTLE FRONTIER (Battle Frontier)

Instant hit or grower? Ugh, not a fan. Worst of AG, plus worst so far.

Musicality: From 'if you're strong' to 'find your destiny' eventually grew on me a little, but the rest of the song is abysmal. There is nothing about this song that is special, even the half of the chorus that I don't mind as much is nowhere near the level of the other themes. Big thumbs down from Kel. 0/10

Animation: I kinda like that sequence with May, Drew and Harley with the pokemon in front of them. I don't care enough about the frontier brains to enjoy their cameos. The fucking bit with Ash during 'it's the master plan' and he's turning round to the beat, ugh it annoys me so much! Overall a bit chaotic. Nothing special at all. 2/10

TR appearance: NO TEAM ROCKET!! -10/10

Bonus points? Everything’s shit, plus minus bonus points for the god-awful song at the end!! Fucking hell. -20/10

POKERAP GS (SHORT VERSION) (Pokemon Chronicles)

Instant hit or grower? Grower

Musicality: I wasn't fussed on it at first but damn it's catchy. Can't help singing along and bopping your head. But it's nothing special. 6/10

Animation: Yay Celebi. Everything fits to the beat. Yay Tracey and Misty and Richie. Nothing else really to say. 5/10

TR appearance: None, but this is about side characters / 'old friends' (even tho TR have their own eps) so I forgive them. 0/10

Bonus points? The song is catchy as hell. 4/10

#today on Kel's pokeani watch-thru #pokemon theme songs #pokemon anime #pokeani #anipoke #pokemon music

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junker-town · 7 years

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'Air Bud' is good

20 years later, a fresh look at the classic film.

I’ve never seen Air Bud. Think about how weird that is: The movie came out in 1997. I was eight, the perfect age to see a movie about a dog that plays basketball. Everybody saw Air Bud. Everybody loved Air Bud. The Air Bud franchise was to children in the ’90s as the 50 Shades of Gray franchise is to suburban moms now, just with more sports and no sex stuff.

And yet, I missed it. I blame this on the fact that I’m an only child whose parents are more into Proust than they are Disney movies (they’re very smart and wonderful people). But because I didn’t have cable or siblings to tell me what was cool, I grew up watching PBS and not knowing the lyrics to the Spice Girls’ songs. My 1990s cultural blindspots still haunt me. Case in point: Kel Mitchell went to Super Bowl media night as his Good Burger character, and I got mercilessly roasted when I asked my colleagues who the guy in the fast food uniform was.

I’m telling you this to explain why I’m sitting at my desk watching Air Bud in the SB Nation offices at 4:25 pm on a Thursday. This year marks the 20th anniversary of the film’s release, the NBA trade deadline is over, the Oscars are this weekend. I felt like only way I could create content of dubious quality honoring all three momentous occasions at once was to finally watch Air Bud and blog my experience.

I also want to see if you guys have been right this whole time. Is Air Bud as good as everyone’s been saying it is for the past 20 years? Let’s find out.

HERE WE GO!

The movie opens on an idyllic country road, and, oh my god, what is happening? A giant wooden clown head is cresting over a hill. It’s perched on top of a pickup truck driven by a guy dressed as a clown.

I’m confused. Is this a horror film or a movie for children? Is Air Bud actually the prequel to Saw? Has everyone has been lying to me about this movie a part of some sick, elaborate prank?

Things start to make more sense when I see a dog in the back of the pickup truck. I’m pretty sure it’s Air Bud himself, dressed up as a clown.

It turns out that Bad Clown Dude performs at kid’s birthday parties, and Air Bud is his sidekick who does tricks with balls. Bad Clown Dude is a real dick. He beats Air Bud and decides to take the dog to the pound after things go awry at the party. I hate this man with my entire being.

Fortunately, the gate of the pickup truck is down, so Air Bud’s crate — with Air bud locked in it — falls out the back. Trucks are screaming by as he’s trapped in the middle of the road, and then he gets hit by a car.

I mean, not, like, badly, but hard enough so that his crate topples over and he pops out. I know I’m not supposed to laugh right now, but a dog in a clown suit is pretty funny. The mom driving the SUV that hit him is like, “Huh, hit a dog, whoops,” and then keeps driving.

What kind of monster hits a dog and doesn’t stop to save it?

We can tell that her son Josh — who’s sitting up front because no one gave a damn about air bags in the 1990s and we all turned out okay, okay? — is the main character by the way the camera lingers on his face. He longingly watches Air Bud trot down the road behind the car.

Josh and his family have just moved to Fernville, Washington to be near his mom’s relatives after his dad passed away. A shot of Josh in his empty room holding a box of stuff shows us how lonely and sad he is. In the kitchen, Josh’s mom is on the phone having conversation that clearly isn’t relevant to the plot but intrigues me, because I hear her say, “I understand that Bolivia didn’t get the napkins, and Venezuela did?”

“Napkins” is definitely code for “cocaine.” Josh’s mom is an international drug lord.

Drug Dealer Mom hangs up on whatever cartel runner she was talking to and asks Josh how school was. Josh says his first line of the whole movie: “It sucks.”

School does, indeed, suck; Josh tries to sign up for the basketball team, but the asshole coach makes him be the manager instead. I feel bad for the kid, but things start looking up when he finds a magical basketball court behind his house. It’s on the edge of a beautiful lake surrounded by mountains, and it’s a good thing Drug Dealer Mom is a kingpin, because otherwise this family wouldn’t be able to afford such prime real estate.

There are bits and pieces of a clown suit strewn about the court. We hear barking from the bushes. And then ****SPOILER ALERT**** Air Bud shows up! He eats a pudding cup that must’ve fallen out of Josh’s backpack. Pudding can’t be good for dogs, but Air Bud is dirty and hungry, so we aren’t supposed to care.

Josh picks up a basketball and tosses it to Air Bud. Because he’s a trained clown dog, Air Bud can balls out, and the two pals have the time of their lives playing together. I start laughing because it’s so delightful, but I’m also tearing up, because it’s very moving to see Josh finally make a friend.

I’m starting to understand why everyone loves this movie so much.

Josh brings Air Bud home. Air Bud eats Spaghetti-Os in the bathroom, and I will honestly be shocked if this dog is alive in ten minutes given all the crap this boy has fed it. There are five open cans of Spaghetti-Os on the ground. The poor animal is going to have to get his stomach pumped.

Josh is wearing a suit of old time-y rain gear. He gives Air Bud a bath and brushes his teeth.

Drug Dealer Mom comes home from dealing drugs and gets pissed when Air Bud spills paint all over the house. But she lets Josh keep the dog, because if she didn’t, the movie would be over.

Now we’re at the school gym, where Josh meets a kind, older man who works as a janitor there, because what would a ’90s movie be without a non-threatening black man whose backstory is developed just enough — but not more — to serve the narrative needs of the white protagonist? It turns out that this guy was a great basketball player for the Knicks, and I’m like, “Uh, why would a former NBA player now be working as a janitor at a middle school in Washington state as opposed to sipping margaritas in Tulum or hosting a show on ESPN?”

But I let it go, because I start wondering what happened to Josh in real life. What if Josh is hot now?

He is. I just Googled him. Check out how hot Josh is.

He’s over-groomed, but the man looks good. This is not a Haley Joel Osment situation.

Things are getting better for Josh. Buddy (that’s what Josh calls Air Bud) performs basketball tricks during halftime after Josh makes the team. Josh even has a friend, this kid with an aggressive bowl cut who carries around an orange peel that Scotty Pippen once threw away, as well as a piece of chewed-up gum that Dennis Rodman once spit out. I don’t know where he’s getting all this famous trash. The boys put it in their socks for good luck.

The asshole coach ends up getting fired when the principal catches him pelting Trash Kid with basketballs in a dark gym. This feels a little heavy for a children’s movie, but it works as a plot device, because it means that the basketball-great-turned-janitor can take over the team as Good Coach and preach the beauty of teamwork.

The inevitable Scary Moment Where Everything Could Fall Apart comes when Bad Clown Dude shows up to reclaim Air Bud. Josh steals Air Bud back, but worries that he’s just going to get taken again. So he hops a ferry with the dog and goes to an island.

“Go on Buddy, you’re free now,” Josh says, crying, as he makes Buddy leave him. I feel this sharp pain in my chest. Buddy hops into the water, whining as he watches Josh get carried away.

I’m softly crying. I’m glad I didn’t watch this movie when I was little because I don’t know that I could’ve handled heartbreak at such an early age.

Josh is back at school playing basketball. I’m still broken up over the fact that he left his goddamn dog on a goddamn island. But then we hear barking and — could it be?! — BUDDY RETURNS! Thank god I only had to suffer like that for seven minutes.

Josh’s team only has four players on the court because one just got hurt. There’s no rule that dogs can’t play basketball, so Buddy, wearing little doggie basketball shoes and an adorable doggie jersey, checks in. I’m laughing and crying again as I watch Josh and Buddy win the game.

It’s 6 p.m. now, and the office is emptying out.

I breathe a sigh of relief knowing there are only 15 minutes left and more truly bad shit can’t happen. But there’s going to be some slightly bad shit, because Bad Clown Dude shows up again.

Drug Dealer Mom says something along the lines of, “Hell no, you’re not taking my dog!” Bad Clown Dude goes, “I’LL SEE YOU IN COURT!” Donald Trump plagiarized Air Bud.

I guess legal fees don’t matter when you’re Drug Dealer Mom and want to be sure your kid doesn’t lose his dog, because here we are, in court. Thankfully, Good Coach shows up and saves the day; it turns out that he used to be the old, curmudgeonly judge’s favorite player.

Good Coach proposes that Buddy choose who he wants to belong to. After a few suspenseful pump-fakes, Air Bud obviously chooses Josh, jumping up to give him a hug. The movie ends with a huge crowd cheering outside the courthouse.

Hulu asks me if I want to watch Homeward Bound II: Lost in San Francisco. Yes, Hulu, that’s literally all I want, but it would be weird to stay in the office until 9 p.m. watching another kid’s movie about dogs, and I’m emotionally exhausted, so I go home.

THE VERDICT:

Air Bud is good. I love Air Bud. I think I probably would’ve questioned less — why is Josh wearing foul weather gear to take a bath with his dog? Why are bullies in ’90s movies always chewing gum? Why do the feds never show up to investigate Drug Dealer Mom? — if I’d seen this as a kid.

But I’m glad I didn’t. Watching it now reminded me what it felt like to be a child. It brought me back to the days when all I worried about was if my crush would pick me to be on his soccer team at recess and if there was a new episode of Wishbone that night. When a new set of baseball cards could bring infinite happiness.

Air Bud stands the test of time. It’s a cinematic masterpiece that gave me a respite from being an adult almost two hours. What could be better than that?

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