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lovelyirony · 4 years

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ravenclaw!tony x quidditch player!rhodey (i'm not sure which house)

Tony was never very interested in Quidditch. He was an excellent flyer, that much can be said. But he was more focused on his inventions and making sure that Professor Pierce didn’t find out that he was using the time that he spent lecturing about “the illustrious history of wizards (who were predominantly pureblood)” to do more useful things, like take a nap or invent a quill that could write longer than fifteen minutes. And, you didn’t have to dictate it.

So Quidditch was rarely his thing, although occasionally he let Sharon drag him down or he went to go see Bruce play.

This time, it was Ravenclaw against Gryffindor. Bruce had told Tony it would be quite an interesting match because it was a real competition this time, and it’s not like Tony had any homework due. He’d done it all at least a week in advanced.

So Tony went down to the stands and stood with the rest of the crowd, a hum of excitement buzzing in the air.

The teams came swirling out of the gates, cheers erupting. But while Tony is cheering and looking for Bruce, someone else catches his eye.

It’s a very attractive man in red and gold, laughing as Sharon fist-bumps him. He doesn’t know who that is, but he wants to. Suddenly, he’s glad that he’s in the first row.

The game becomes more interesting. Tony secretly cheers as the guy zooms and scores and people around him groan.

“Fucking James,” a guy next to him murmurs.

“Is that the Gryffindor?” Tony asks.

“Yeah, James Rhodes. A nice guy, absolute beast on the field.”

“I don’t think I’ve seen him before,” Tony says.

“That’s because you’re a gigantic nerd who only stays inside during most matches,” Maria hollers. “He goes by Jim and he’s in our Muggle Studies class!”

“Good to know,” Tony says, looking forward. Pepper rolls her eyes as she finds Tony in the crowd.

“So, you finally noticed Jim.”

“Sorry that I was utilizing my time for education instead of ogling someone,” Tony retorts. “My bad.”

They both turn back to the game. Pepper is surprisingly invested in the game of Quidditch. Her father and mother had met through the sport, both professionally involved. She had surprised both by not entering in to play for Ravenclaw, which they had expected.

But she cheers loudly as Bruce knocks a bludger directly out of space right into...

James Rhodes. He obviously isn’t expecting it, but it slams into his stomach and he gets knocked off his broom, falling. There are gasps, and Tony can’t bear it.

He uses a cushioning charm, which could be potentially dangerous seeing as how it was advanced for what he was doing in magic, and he technically wasn’t supposed to know about it.

James doesn’t know who the hell did the charm, but he grabs his broom and speeds back up. He doesn’t have time, not when the Ravenclaw Seeker is racing towards something that looks suspiciously shiny.

The Ravenclaw team ends up winning, and James is left to brood as their captain rants about strategy for about the twenty-first-straight-minute. But after the brooding, their captain asks him how he knew about the cushioning charm.

He blinks.

“I didn’t.”

So begins the great question: who did it?

Pepper knows. So does Bruce. They tease Tony relentlessly about his new crush.

“Leave it to Tony to put advanced magic as the first move,” Pepper says, reaching delicately across the table to grab a croissant.

“Shut up,” Tony hisses. “I just...didn’t want him to get hurt. You remember that one kid who’s arm went boneless.”

“Yeah, that was because of Lockhart, that idiot,” Bruce says, scowling. “I still can’t believe our Defense teacher wanted us to read one of his books. It’s shitty and plagiarized at the same time.”

Tony laughs.

“Yeah, you’re right. Luckily, we both bullshitted the essay to prove a point and she didn’t kick our ass.”

“May’s a scary lady,” Pepper says, shuddering. “I heard she took on a den of vampires all by herself. They called her ‘The Cavalry’.”

“Well luckily for us, she likes all three of us,” Tony says. “And I need to get to Advanced Arithmancy. I hope I don’t put my wand to my head out of boredom. I’ll see you guys in Muggle Studies!”

The day goes well, until thirty minutes before Muggle Studies he remembers that they have it with Gryffindor, and this means he will see James Rhodes.

The Gryffindors are a bunch who tend to not hold too many grudges, although quite a bit of pride was hurt. But they don’t hold it against most of the house and the lesson starts amicably. Their professor then decides they need partnerwork.

“I’ll be pairing you up with a student from the other house,” Coulson says. “Alright, Pepper Potts with Carol Danvers....” Bruce gets paired with Eddie Brock, who’s been busy writing notes on his arm for a new story, and Tony’s left.

“Anthony with James.”

“Tony.”

“Jim.”

Coulson rolls his eyes.

“You two are perfect then. Get to your lesson on researching different innovations, and your presentation will be in fifteen minutes. Two minutes each, be sure to be compelling.”

Tony is nervous, but he flips through their textbook. Jim is a nice guy to look at.

"So, you’re Tony?” he asks.

“You’re...Rhodes?”

“Call me Jim.”

“Ah, no. Used to have a neighbor named Jim who tried to kill me when I started making his garden gnomes fly around.”

“That’s problematic. How old were you?”

“...seven.”

“Then what are you gonna call me? Hmm?”

“Well, I’m not sure, there are lots of possibilities. There’s Jimmy, which is--”

“No.”

“Alright, moving on then. Rhodes?”

“What am I, a butler? Next.”

“Jim-Jam.”

“Oh god, that sounds....gross.”

“Rhodey?”

“I can....live with that.”

By the time the conversation is starting to get friendlier, presentations are starting and Tony and newly-named Rhodey realize that they haven’t, in fact, researched any sort of Muggle device, so they will have to bullshit one.

“Hope you know tech,” Tony mutters, as he stands up. “We researched the computers, which started out technically in the 19th century...”

“...and now we’re dealing with virtual reality and the revolution of technology in relation to rising prices,” Rhodey finishes.

“I’m glad you both did thorough research...unlike some of your classmates.”

(Tony can see the birds that Pepper and Bruce are flipping him, and he nearly laughs out loud as he makes his way to his seat.)

But Rhodey smiles back at him, and Tony waves.

When Rhodey comes back to the common room with a tune humming, the whole of the house knows that Rhodey’s feeling something.

“Who’s the lucky guy?” Carol hollers.

“What?” Rhodey asks, closing his textbook.

“Who’s got you dazed and in loooveee?” She sing-songs, tie askew.

“Nobody,” Rhodey says. “And quit it.”

“You only hum when you have a crush,” Sharon reminds him. “Remember when you liked Sam?”

“Please make me forget the humiliation of finding out that he was already dating somebody,” Rhodey says. “And don’t announce this to everyone.”

But it’s too late, because all of Gryffindor knows and then Carol, Thor, and Sharon make him tell them at midnight.

“A guy from Muggle Studies,” Rhodey admits. “Name is Tony.”

Sharon laughs, eyes wide.

“You mean Tony Stark? My cousin? Oh my god, this is gonna be hilarious.”

“If you make fun of me I’m going to snipe you,” Rhodey says, flopping onto his back with his pillow. “Now let me sleep.”

Similarly, Pepper and Bruce have also made fun of Tony.

“You like him. You gave him a nickname and everything. It took me four months to get one,” Bruce says. “And you gave him one in, like, two seconds. That has to mean true love.”

“Well sorry I’m not calling someone something as dignified as James or as awful as Jim,” Tony says. “Besides, he’s just cute. I don’t really know anything about him other than he has a nice face and seems nice.”

“That’s all you need,” Pepper reminds him. “Now come on and try not to look for him when breakfast is.”

Tony looks for Rhodey. Because of course he does. But Rhodey is looking over his way, and he turns red and waves. Rhodey smiles back, and goes over to talk with him.

“Oh god,” Tony mutters, trying desperately to swallow the roll he shoved in his mouth quite quickly. He doesn’t manage to and has to spit it into a napkin and face Rhodey, who is laughing a bit.

“The rolls that bad?”

“Just a bit on the stale side,” Tony lies. Bruce and Pepper are looking studiously at the bagels that are on their plates, and trying desperately not to belie the laughs they want to belt out.

“Well just wanted to say hi, wonder what you’re up to. You coming to the next match?”

“It’s you guys against...Slytherin, right?”

“Yeah,” Rhodey says. “I’m gonna see if we can kick ass. Natasha’s back with a vengeance.”

“She tends to like the sharp cuts and daring dives,” Tony says. “Stay steady and don’t chase after her, because she will beat you.”

“You gonna be there?”

“Not sure yet,” Tony says, smiling. “Why?”

“Just thought you’d like to see it,” Rhodey says, shrugging. “I’ll see you soon, okay?”

“You got it.”

When Tony turns back to Bruce and Pepper, they look very unimpressed.

“You need to go to that match,” Bruce says. “And this is coming who only comes for Thor and literally nothing else if I’m not playing.”

“It’s true,” Pepper says. “Go, and be in the Gryffindor section. I’ll loan you my golden-red scarf.”

“Why?”

“Guys like seeing the person they like in their colors,” Pepper says, smiling. “You should invite him to come with you to Hogsmeade. He’d probably indulge your sweet tooth a bit.”

“That is true,” Bruce says. “Or you guys could watch the new band that is playing at the bar.”

Tony turns red.

“I should go, shouldn’t I?”

“Don’t be an idiot,” Bruce says. “I’ll come with you.”

Tony starts looking for different Gryffindor scarves to wear, because Pepper’s is too bold. He wants something understated.

As it turns out, Gryffindor doesn’t do understated. They’re all bold and they all keep asking why he wants it, and he breaks down and says that he’s going for Rhodey, and he wants to fit in.

Sharon elbows him and gets a sweater.

“I love this,” Tony gushes. “Thanks for letting me borrow your stuff, Sharon.”

Carol looks on as he rushes down the hallway.

“He doesn’t know that’s Rhodey’s, right?” she asks.

“No, no he does not,” Sharon adds, grinning. “I think our guy might just run into a hoop. Do you think they count in-love players as points?”

“If we bribe Sam enough,” Carol snickers. “Hope you didn’t just doom us for tomorrow.”

(She almost did, but Rhodey’s a good player.

But he does go in for a kiss on his broom, and it makes a lovely picture for the school picture.)

#lovelyirony writes #hogwarts au #FUCK THIS WAS LONGER THAN ANTICIPATED #ironhusbands #thorbruce #carol danvers #tony stark #pepper potts #bruce banner #thor #rhodey #war machine #iron man #natasha romanoff #maria hill

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