#I'm back on my bullshit everybody!

[just-j-really]

"I just don't get it," Hob says, for the fifth or sixth or possibly twentieth time that night, glancing over the rim of his cup at Will, who's sitting on the other side of the room, cuddling with his soulmate in an armchair that's really too small for the both of them. "Why everyone's so hung up on soulmates."

It's all anyone's been able to talk about tonight- and sure, that's fair, it is Will and Ann's engagement party, but Hob has overheard the phrases 'oh you're so lucky you found each other so young' and 'why did you wait this long?' far too many times for one night. Will and Ann met as toddlers; they've never had another option and Hob cannot fathom why everyone seems to think that's a good thing.

Case in point, even his little group of Unmatched friends react to his statement with varying degrees of exasperation.

Hob is just sober enough to be aware he should probably shut up, and drunk enough that he keeps talking anyway. "I mean, I've seen 'soulmates'," he says. "My parents were soulmates, both my siblings met theirs, half of my friends are paired off by now. It's not like I don't know how soulmates work. Soulmates are..." he takes a moment, gathers his thoughts, and even though he's not entirely sure what he's about to say, the moment the word leaves his mouth he knows it's exactly right, "Stupid."

His friends laugh uncomfortably. "You're an idiot," Andrew says, not unkindly.

But Hob's on a roll now, an argument that's been simmering in his chest for years spilling out of him, the exhilaration of speaking making the words come easily. "You literally don't have to stay with your soulmate. No one has to! Everyone just goes along with it because everybody else does. But not me. I've made up my mind," he says, setting his cup down and straightening his shoulders. He's been bullshitting a bit but he means this, knows down to his bones that this is something worth staking his life on. "I'm going to meet someone perfect who isn't my soulmate, and I'll marry them instead."

He feels like he should do something solemn to mark this occasion. Stand up on a table, maybe.

Instead, most of his friends laugh at him again. "Hobs, that's the literal definition of your soulmate. Someone who's perfect for you," Gwen points out. The laughter is teasing, and Gwen's tone is more reassuring than anything else, but still, Hob finds himself frustrated.

"But there's so much more out there. So many people to fall in love with," he insists. "Shouldn't I know who's perfect for me better than anyone?"

And his friends tease him for somehow being sappily romantic in his opposition to sappy romance, and he laughs along with them and points out that his perfect person will be more understanding than them, for sure. And he's genuinely a bit hurt, but Gwen bumps his shoulder apologetically and he thinks that destiny has nothing on these friends he's made on purpose, who know him well enough for these unspoken gestures. And there's movement in the corner of his eye.

Hob looks up.

The most gorgeous man alive is standing in front of him. He's tall- probably taller than Hob, even- pale and willowy, with a mess of soft-looking black hair. His eyes are a deep blue Hob didn't think existed in real life until this moment. He looks like the slightly magical prince in a fairy tale got loose in the real world and decided to become a goth. He's perfect.

"Did I hear you say," the man asks, his voice soft and deep all at once, resonant in a way that Hob's never heard before, "you have no intention of meeting your soulmate?"

Not if he's you, Hob thinks, I take it all back if he's you.

Despite what many of his friends will argue, he is capable of not voicing every thought that comes into his head, if only under extreme circumstances, so he offers the stranger his best grin and says, "Yeah. Yeah, I do."

"You'll need to tell me how that works out, then," the man replies.

"Don't encourage him!" Andrew calls from the other side of their little cluster.

The man- flinches, just a little. Hob probably wouldn't have noticed if he hadn't been staring at him, but Hob's universe just gained a new center, so he is and he does.

"Hey," he says, catching the man's eyes, "Don't mind him, he's just boring. You really want to know how it goes, finding someone who isn't my soulmate?"

"I do," the man says, seriously, like he genuinely thinks Hob's quest is worth his full attention. It leaves Hob feeling warm, almost giddy.

"Perfect," Hob says, and then, because he's never known when to quit, "Let me give you my number, so I can update you?"

The man nods, a teasing little smirk appearing on his face, as though he and Hob already know each other perfectly, and this is a shared, ancient joke between the two of them. His fingers brush Hob's as he passes over his phone.

Nothing happens. There's no spark, no splash of color on Hob's skin marking where this stranger's fingers first dragged over his.

They are, definitively, not soulmates.

And Hob knows for certain that he's right.

[Part Two]

#dreamling #the anti-soulmate au #I'm back on my bullshit everybody! #it's not soulmates but it IS love at first sight #for one of them anyway #my fic #unsoulmates au

[rawliverandgoronspice]

tbh, and that's just my two cents, I think that when we leave our little corner of ganonfans and try to bring out concerns to the larger Outside World trying to convince other people, it's a little more useful at large to center criticisms of Zelda and its narrative outside of what canon states (so in "doylist terms", tho I don't really like that separation but it might be easier to understand), because most of the content that criticizes Hyrule within the games is subtextual and neutered at best (not something meant to be picked up by their core audience of "children who do not come from an oppressed background"), and also because it would be soooo super easy for Nintendo to say "no we never meant any of that in any way :>", which would effectively slam the conversation shut for many people who were skeptical to begin with.

While it's extremely easy to say "no of course Nintendo would never want their good guys to come from a genocidal nation, so they obviously don't", which sounds like a coherent argument, it becomes wayyy harder to brush off the whole "Nintendo chose to repeatedly uphold the exceptional perfection of a white nation whose ruling class comes from a divine birthline while demonizing the only evil men from the explicitely arab-inspired culture, leaving the rest of their women to grovel in eternal apologies and convert to the dominant religion in order to prove the depth of their remorse" without starting to spew out bullshit arguments that fall apart at the first brush of scrutiny or reveal their own racism in the process.

I'm not saying there *aren't* hyrulean genocidal strikes within the canon itself, because there obviously are, but I'd say that to even begin to be willing to see them, you need first to admit the entire Zelda narrative has concerning priorities when it comes to the framing of the events taking place in its lore, or the need to even touch such topics to begin with, that it has concerning echoes to real life history, and so there is a genuine need to challenge that framing at all.

#thoughts #zelda critical #zelda fandom critical #imperialism #gerudos #ganondorf #I think people who have not done the first step back to take it all in will look at “hyrule is genocidal” and go #“this is game theory bullshit level of edgy darkness for teenagers” #and then never think about it again #I'm not saying the other method will necessarily yield a lot more results #but everybody I ever convinced were convinced by the framing argument *first* #and then connected the dots by themselves generally #again just my two cents vOv #I mean there will always be people going UGH SO YOU'RE JUST A GANONDORF APOLOGIST #which.... yeah there's nothing to be done about that unfortunately vOv

[splickedylit]

It's 4:13 AM and I am...............sketching............

#Splickedydoodles #back on my bullshit by which I mean HALO IMAGERY FOR EVERYBODY!!!!! >8U #I'm not tagging this lol

[origami-trust]

magp009 spoilers

He's rolling in the grave now 😔

#the magnus protocol #the magnus protocol spoilers #listen I resisted saying this for all of 2 seconds everybody praise my strength #should I say I'm back on my bullshit if I never left

[lynaferns]

School is draining any small motivation I had for art

or creativity in general

(tw: I got pretty much depressive in the tags but I needed to dump this somewhere and this may not be the best place but is where I feel better talking about my problems or insecurities, so feel free to ignore)

#vent in the tags #tw vent #i'm tired #and I hate that I'm tired #everytime I try to finish education is worst than the last time. my head can't take any sort of information from the class #no matter how many times they try to explain me or how many times I read and reread the same text #I can't focus. I can't memorize anything. I'm just sitting there in the classroom waiting for the 4 hours to finish to go back home #and spend the rest of the night just doing nothing. staring at the walls or doomscrolling till I have to go to bed and wake up again #for another day of fighting against an stupid anxiety attack in class because I'm going to fail this again #I hate school. I fucking hate it. the most boring stressing overwhelming way of learning #having the teacher talk for 1-2 hours straight and the student listening the whole time not saying anything is stupid #it's so fucking stupid they only want them to be mindless sheeps that only listen #because if you say anything 'no. you're wrong. I'm the teacher and I know better' fucking bullshit #this system is bullshit #and how am I supposed to study a whole school year of history. biology. math etc in less than 4 months?? #everybody was like #'oh it's just 4 months and you'll be out of school!' 'in 4 months you'll get the education!' 'you can finish this in just 4 months!' #I fucking can't! I can't do this in such short time! I can't. focus. on 6. subjects at the same time. my brain can't! #and it's so fucking depressing. I have 4 opportunities to finish this. the longest it could take me is 2 years #I could just focus on 1 or 2 things each time but if I fail too many times I won't have another opportunity like this ever again #and I won't be able to finish highschool education and I. just. can't. #I'm tired of giving my biggest effort and not being enough. I'm tired of getting no satisfaction from any achievement I get #I hate so many things right now #and I have a lot more things in my head right now but I better shut up #you don't have to comfort me. it's ok. I'm not searching for confort. I just needed a place to dump my frustration or something #idk #you can ignore this #I might delete this later

[ellies-little-gun]

Ellie x Riley + Can't Help Falling In Love (cover) by Twenty One Pilots

#Hello everybody I am back on my bullshit #she says like she ever got off it #I used this song in the Ellie/Riley fic I'm writing #and was like welp now I need to make an edit #so enjoy :) #ellie williams #riley abel #ellie williams x riley abel #riley abel x ellie williams #ellie x riley #riley x ellie #tlou #hbo tlou #tlou edit #hbo tlou edit #Z edits

[fellhalcyon]

the fact that a. e. housman wrote this poem almost a hundred years ago and somehow, today, managed to catapult me directly back into my deranged slushpile of emotion re: a certain side character in a certain gay thai mafia series is impressive in its testament to the everlasting power of literature yet more than a little concerning in its reflection upon my mental state. anyways. yeah this is about big

#kinnporsche the series #kinnporsche big #kinn x big #kinn anakinn theerapanyakul #kinn anakinn #a e housman #i have absolutely no excuse for this. it simply sprang fully formed from my mind #á la athena from zeus's forehead #and i felt compelled to inflict it upon the world #sorry everybody i'm afraid i'm back on my kinnbig bullshit #but you know what? what else is new huh #somebody put me the entire fuck to sleep

[starberry-skies]

what ISN'T contradictory: mspec veldians/lesbians

what IS contradictory: supporting mogai but not supporting said mspec veldians/lesbians. lookin at you, """"safequeer""""

#yes i'm back on my bullshit #srry that whole movement just makes me Angry #also ppl who just believe this in general. like stfu #bi lesbians (and yk. everybody else included in mspec veldians/lesbians that we often forget) are just using the labels that make them #happiest. more comfortable. and isn't that what mogai's all about? #chirping #discourse dni unless ur polite ig :/

[soryualeksi]

Literally the absolute most mind-bogglingly "I'm going to fucking SCREAM" aspect about talking any family history at all with fellow Germans is everyone insisting that they were the ONE family with no nazis on the entire fucking, oh wait no, all of their families' neighbours ALSO weren't nazis, and their village and their town and literally it was always just the others and THEY didn't notice anything was off and ALSO they were against everything FROM THE BEGINNING and also like, the Holocaust just carried itself out quietly in some far-far away unnoticeable piece of remote forest or something.

It's driving me insane.

Nobody knew, but EVERYONE was in the resistance. Also, SIMULTANEOUSLY, they all knew BUT were incapable of doing anything because they feared for their own lives every second, from the very beginning of course.

#found out people in my great grandparents generation of my family kept Zwangsarbeiter #that means kidnapped slaves from the invaded territories #that were worked to death and their kids who could not work were taken from them and murdered #they were used and abused everywhere in the system in every industry #everyone knew about them #but now i found concrete proof about specific individuals kept by members of my family #to abuse in their family business #and when i try to find out more all around me i get slammed with #'you know germans had no choice but to TAKE the Zwangsarbeiter ASSIGNED to them by force and at least it was better than KZ' #no I'm pretty sure they thought it was super convenient to get slaves hand delivered to them #I'm sure so don't give me that bullshit #i need to get to the documents because I HAVE to find out more #or rather #i WANT to find out more #I'm sick of people rather telling themselves lies than being helpful #holocaust cw #slavery cw #nazi germany #germany where nobody knew but was in the resistance but everybody knew but didn't dare fight back #fuck you #german stuff #genocide cw

[tardis--dreams]

i love group work. i'd also love to scream very loudly and maybe torture one or two people with needles. but these two things are unrelated

#omg using tumblr on desktop sucks so bad #istg tumblr is my personal version of the fridge #the amount of times i tried to open that goddamm app in the last 12 hours or so just to realize it's not there is-- #i practiced a lot of korean instead lmao #but yeah back to the point: AAAAAAAAAAAAAhhhhhshAAHHHH #this is so frUStrating #nah we don't do the theoretical research first we go straight to analysis and then are shocked we have no idea what we're doing here #like i feel like everybody just does their own bullshit and i'm trying to glue it together #I hate the lack of control here. listen. I do another group presentation in 1.5 weeks #and we are 3 people but I am the only person who does anything and i will also most likely be the person presenting everything #but that is still better than whatever the fuck is going on here. i Hate this so much jesus christ #(i'll close this tab now so i won't be tempted to make more rant posts otherwise i might as well reinstall that app #but this is my version of a cigarette break #university ramblings

[seventytwoowls]

american who has never left the country for longer than a week tries to write about a british TV character (5 dead 10 injured)

#that's right everybody I'm back on my bullshit

[origami-trust]

Welp, calling the 'What does the P in Quincey P. Morris Stand For' poll 4 hours early due to overwhelming majority: I'm going to go by what was most tagged in the responses, and so, lo and behold, the P stands for: Quincey Poll Morris.

#dracula #dracula daily #should I say I'm back on my bullshit if I never left #everybody was saying 'poll' in the tags so I assume it was being offered as a middle name suggestion :3

[bladeofthestars]

.

#going through another period of 'HOLY FUCK I NEED TO EXERCISE' #primarily motivated by the increasing pain i've been experiencing from not having kept on top of my maintenance exercises #but also motivated somewhat by my partner taking risqué photos of me and having to confront that my body has changed recently #like the photos are still sexy but that is *not* what i look like in my head or looked like last year even #also my back and knees shouldn't hurt literally every single day #i know that it's possible to get those to hurt like. once a week tops if i'm doing it right #maybe more if the weather is especially bad bc huh all those old people weren't bullshitting about storm fronts hurting their joints #i get to go judge an academic quiz bowl thing this weekend and am excited #did it last year and many of the same kids will be there again this year #and it'll be a weekend with my friends to boot #haven't seen everybody in too long #hope it's a better hang out than new years was #all of those kids need hella positive adult attention #they sponge it up #very cute

[lesbianpikachu]

.

#WE ARE SO BACK DUDE #MAN #this is like the first good night i've had in a while #goddamn it i fucking hate being an adult and it's something that's frustrated me in a way i don't know how to express for so fucking long #being able to admit that to myself and just say it out loud feels so fucking good. I do not want to do adult shit. i do not want to pretend #to be normal fuck everything and everybody i fucking hate being an adult i hate careers and social niceties fuck everything #god i fucking hate everything and im so happy to be able to say that again. life fucking sucks and thats it #oh my god ive been stuck in a positivity puddle for so long i hate it. complaining and hating is my lifee i will never stop #just oh my god it's so hard to be alive all the time and nobody ever talks about it and just expects you to do everything right all the tim #We are not going to fucking make it dude. what else is there. can we do something else #i feel so expected to just do things right all the time and i feel like people can see that and just make fun of me for existing all the ti #i fucking hate it! literally all of that shit makes me want to die. but like yeah like oh my god putting all of that down might fix me #we'll see. oh god the pokemon video looms large. im on gen 4 but i've been hardcore procrastinating on it. i'm just so done with all the sh #MAN i feel like a real person again i feel like i can breathe. i have been so frustrated w my friends and family for the longest time #and now i just feel like oh. yeah. literally none of this bullshit is necessary. why am i letting all these people tell me how to live #Who cares if im alone who cares if someones watching who cares if people like me i am alone i am happy i am doing what i want #like if i meet my goals and i feel like im doing what i think i should be doing then who cares. i'm having the experiences i want to have #and that's enough. it was always enough. and anybody who says it isn't should get over it. im fine. why are you trying to make me not fine #ok im done im done i just wnated to pour all this out. it feels a little cheesey but legitimately most nights to me feel like they dont mat #and this one is one that for the first time in a long felt like it finally did

[hollow-prey]

physically I'm here listening to the Jak OSTs to drown out any outside noise, mentally I'm pulling the covers over my head, isolating myself, and trying not to overthink myself into a breakdown and/or panic attack from my own anxiety and paranoia

#dumb #on tonight's episode of 'things I should probably go to therapy for': #my oddly specific fear of what my parents say about me when I'm not around! #it does not matter who you are or what you do; there will always be something for them to pick apart and criticize behind your back! #they've got something to say about everybody so surely they've got plenty to say about me #and part of me is constantly on edge worrying about all the ways they criticize me and my choices behind my back #this is also part of several reasons why I haven't come out to them as ace yet. after 8 years. #part of it is because I'm worried they won't understand or believe me even after I explain it #another part of me is afraid they'll take me coming out and somehow twist it to mean I'm doing it for attention or to be 'different' #or they'll twist it as like 'oh you've put more thought into that than you have into getting a ~real job~' #or some other bullshit to make me look like I'm still a stupid kid who doesn't know anything #all said to each other behind my back of course #anyway if you need me I'll be playing Hades or venting my frustrations into a story #ellie rambles

[ambreiiigns]

you need to understand that the line "nobody exists on purpose nobody belongs anywhere everybody's gonna die come watch tv?" makes me Break Down

#i took a nap. had a fuckin miserable dream abt n**. and so now we pretend it didn't happen by bringing this up again instead #how's that sound? cool? everybody cool w that? great #anyway first time watching that episode was gutting #i don't remember things like these a lot bc when i watch episodic shows everything kinda melts together #but that was insane. bc intergalactic cable is the funniest thing in the world #and then it hits you w all this existential bullshit at the same time #and the show hadn't shown any continuity so far right. i still didn't know if it was gonna have linear lore or if everything was #autoconclusive or selfcontained or however you say that in english and my brother Refused to tell me ANYTHING #so when morty points at the fucking graves????? and that's how they tell me Yes This Will In Fact Have Continuity #boy i felt Gutted. i did not see that coming. and that line just 😭😭😭😭😭😭 #the delivery the earnestness the the just the. you know. like it gets to me i Feel that #like literally so true. shit sucks nothing's worth anything so let's just do pointless little things that make us happy for as long as #we can. that Is the only way to go on. yk like zombieland and enjoy the little things i LIVE by that #that's when i decided i was gonna keep watching rick and morty w gioele even after we finished sk8 #and now i'm talking abt it on tumblr #i'll be normal again tomorrow we go back to ghost posting but today we are being consumed by rick and morty #oh nay