#I’m joking but can you imagine

[chloesimaginationthings]

This will be Markiplier’s cameo in the FNAF 2 movie

#myart #chloesimagination #comic #mike schmidt #fnaf vanessa #vanessa afton #markiplier #the bite of 87 #fnaf #fnaf movie #fnaf 2 #fnaf fanart #five nights at freddy's #I’m joking but can you imagine #making him say ‘bite of 87’ just makes sense right?? #mark just an old security guard who knows it all

[weewoo911]

Eddie possibly sitting on the same side as his girlfriend because she sat down first but he wants to spy on his totally platonic boy best friend

#911 abc #911 spoilers #7x05 #Eddie like: lemme just squeeze in here #no reason at all #certainly not so I can still look directly at Buck and Tommy #I’m joking but can you imagine #buddie #bucktommy

[hijinxinprogress]

YJ is not allowed on social media

Most capes have like an official hero social bc people just leave comments like ‘captain colds out again no class?? 👀’ instead of flagging down a hero or getting the police to get the nearest hero so most crimes are discovered through viral videos

And yj decides that they need to be on social media so they make ig and tiktok accounts which somehow led to them running a smear campaign against Lex while he was running for president

it’s mostly videos of Cassie in a superman onesie flying around pretending to save damsel in distress!Kon while Bart in an ill fitting bald cap is sitting behind a desk clearly made of cardboard as he mutters about how he’ll show everyone the truth and petting a picture of a cat with drawn on angry eyebrows then the video cuts to Bart way too close to the camera saying ‘A vote for Lex Luthor is a vote against happiness’ then the video ends with Cassie in the same superman onesie with a lightning bolt taped to the front of it claiming ‘this message was endorsed by captain marvel’ [a week later captain marvel makes a posts responding to the video in a captain marvel onesie reaffirming Cassie’s claim]

#imagine ‘Hello how can I help you?’ ‘I’m being mugged can you call flash??’ ‘I can have the nearest patrol offic-‘ *dial tone* #yjs plan doesn’t work bc everyone thinks they’re joking #and captain marvel has to suffer through remedial media training with batman #Even worse Lex wins the election #Despite Lex and Kon slandering each other on social media his entire campaign #young justice #young just us #yj98 #greta hayes #dc secret #bart allen #dc impulse #kon el superboy #superboy #cissie king jones #dc arrowette #cassie sandsmark #gnc!cassie sandsmark #wondergirl #anita fite #dc empress #tim drake #dc red robin #billy batson #dc captain marvel #lex luthor #i just imagine the jl reporting all of yjs videos or having it flagged for misinformation

[sun-e-chips]

In your waterpark Au... Do Sun and Moon let high school students volunteer as lifeguards during the summer? I could see Sun and Moon proudly bragging about their students to random people at the park and said kids behind them trying to get them to stop or just plain groaning in embarrassment. Have a fantastic day! (or night?)

Without saying too much (I am currently writing the au shhhhh) I will tell you unfortunately for most the past and the current present there are no human staff and the waterpark is entirely run and maintained by animatronics.

Sun and Moon as well as all the Tiki bots were designed to also fill the role as the park’s lifeguards, many robot eyes are constantly surveying the premise’s. The tiki bots are able to pull people from the water but only sun and moon are designed to perform CPR (I talk a little more about this in a previous ask)

Butttttt If the boys did have human staff they would absolutely be bragging as well as messing with them. The teens would especially be embarrassed by the boys praises and smothering in front of all the parks guests while they’re still on shift. The boys have no shame in expressing their fondness for the staff. All employees would be family no matter how short their time there may have been, Sun and Moon will always remember. They never forget a face after all hehe.

#hello hiiiiii thank you for the ask!!!! #I know I have other asks and I’m answering out of order but I’m still saving them to answer later #it makes me so happy to read everyone’s questions and comments about the au! #but yes sorry no human staff #as of currently… #gosh can you just imagine though the inside jokes the boys would play with the lifeguards #the summer would be their favorite season because that’s when all their friends come back and they get to catch up and leave where they #left off #the boys are very good with that #the game will continue #dca au #waterpark au #WP au asks #waterspark #Waterspark au #Waterspark Bay

[yourlocalgrass]

I just realised I know the birthday Nightmare comes up on the exact day as the said character’s birthday but doesn’t the revival come almost like 5 days before their Birthday??

There hasn’t been any birthday Pop Quiz revival for Levi yet… it should have been here by now. I mean we can still wait until the last day and if it pops up or they’ve removed birthday revival events then… that’s the last of OM ever left that they’ve just removed.

Infact I’ve just realised the recent Birthday Pop Quizz revivals end 2 days before the character’s Birthday

-Simeon’s Birthday is on February 10th

-The twins Birthday is on March 11th

So if we’re talking about Levi’s birthday revival here, it should have ended by now. And well, there you have it, there’s nothing yet. I mean just gotta wait and see…

#um yeah they’re doing a good job in taking hope away #just a joke right?? #well I’m just waiting one or two more days before I go ballistic and curse at the devs #I can have patience… #obey me #obey me swd #obey me shall we date #obey me birthday #obey me event #obey me events #obey me leviathan #yeah no joke you better bring that revival up #imagine if they just forgot because they’re oh so exited about the HDD on Nightbringer as an excuse #I’m trying to keep my cool…

[itspileofgoodthings]

my life is a very slow process of everyone around me telling me not to be anxious and me fighting them all tooth and nail while inching towards more stable mental health.

#I know it’s not true but sometimes I feel like if I didn’t have anxiety I would not suffer at all #which. again. is false #but there’s a lot of things I don’t want in this life and a lot of things I am not scared of and a lot of things I just accept #and like. It’s FINE #but all my suffering from anxiety stays in one fixed flame of sheer agony #and it’s hard because I don’t shake like a chihuahua in the corner of my bedroom #unable to move or function #I’m always doing things and functioning and joking at parties and (generally) saying the right thing #but it’s all located in one corner in the middle of my mind attacking my ability to make judgments and live with my decisions peacefully #like an unseen wound #and the distance i feel it puts between me and other people #is one of the most painful things #just several sheets of frosted glass between me and them #and sometimes the worst it gets is when I can bear it without breaking down and so I just do and I just keep functioning #and the cold just creeps in and everything goes kind of numb! #tbh now that I think about it this might be why I often think of myself as a person with no desires or ambitions or dreams #or impetus or forward motion or anything #because I DO want things and have opinions and the exist in flashes. But also they’re buried deep under several layers of protective apathy #so they’re not stable. I drop them many times. forget them ignore them imagine that they aren’t there. I’m sorry I’m rambling I’m FINE #actually when I talk about it that’s how you know I’m doing okay with it #when I can’t talk about it and am half-heartedly going through the motions #that’s the problem #anyway whew. thanks for listening sorry for all the self-reflection etc. etc. etc.

[catadromously]

i’ve figured it out everyone … we were put on earth to dance and do laundry and meet god in the trees and scream and hold our friends and give them terrible haircuts and climb over fences and smoke weed and collect rocks and witness thunderstorms and rest and fry food and set fires and decorate our bodies and ride trains and cry and hallucinate and get old and fat and sing and tackle our siblings into the dirt and weave and study outer space and be transgender and make ghastly weird art and walk alone at night through silent islands of streetlamp yellow and get stung by bees and do katabasis and sail boats and stare at our hands and put on low-budget children’s theater and kvetch and laugh at phallic imagery and find things that we lost in the most obvious places and grow vegetables and build structures and mend and die and fall in love with dead people and fall in love with alive people and fall in love with radio towers and fall in love with rivers and fall in love with houses and fall in love with birds and repeat the same stories over and over again forever. Simple as that

#sorry sorry i just cooked with twin for the first time in a while i’m done now #dispatch #ok this breached containment a tiny bit I have to explain the joke now. it’s that it’s not simple at all and in fact endlessly variable #I mean can you imagine anything worse than a certain teleological existence

[shima-draws]

So apparently my brain has decided to get back into Sonic again I say already 27 episodes through rewatching Sonic X. Anyway. I love my kids ESPECIALLY Chris to this day I do not understand why people hate on him so much. He’s baby

#Insert joke Chris haters DNI banner #Sonic #Sonic X #Chris Thorndyke #Sonic the Hedgehog #HE’S BABY!!! Cinnamon roll too good for this world too pure #Looking back on all the major reasons why people dislike him I watch the show and I’m like. Bro. There’s SO many things that disprove all #of the bullshit stuff people say about his character #It makes me so angry. My boy deserves better #Also can we PLEASE talk about how both Sonic AND Knuckles lost their shit when Chris got kidnapped. Ridiculous I hate them (lying) #Anyway you know what this means. You KNOW what this means. #It’s time for more GODDAMN ROOMIE AU SHENANIGANS BABY #I have SO many thoughts and headcanons. Please #Chris: I’m going to cause problems on purpose :) #Shadow: #He’s just there. Acting as Chris’ safety net for his crazy schemes. And impulsive decisions. LMAO #Also slightly off that topic but. I can’t remember if Shadow ever meets Helen. I doubt he does in canon but like #She’s literally…a carbon copy of Maria…I imagine Shadow seeing her and losing his SHIT bc he thinks it’s hee #*her #Shadow forever tortured by Maria’s lookalike copy (Helen) and her personality copy (Chris) #Shadow watching Chris accidentally blow himself up while inventing: He’s just like Maria fr 🤧 #I love them. Very much actually #Shima speaks

[the-casbah-way]

not to be obnoxious but like. you people are mad at those watcher guys for making you pay for a subscription service. but you were all able to look past the fact that they had an entire series where they just made jokes about actual real life true crime cases. that makes sense

#i fucking DESPISE buzzfeed unsolved #they were so fucking tone deaf with how they handled their true crime shit it made me so fucking angry #like you guys claim to be against the commercialising of true crime but not when two haha funny little guys do it yeah ?? #fuck you all actually those dudes were always trash #and i kept feeling insane for being bothered by it whilst everyone else was worshipping them #they went to the scene of the keddie cabin murders which is a case i studied back when i did forensic archaeology #and bear in mind that the daughter of that family is still alive #and they stood there next to this site where a family and their friend were stabbed to death and fucking laughed and made jokes #and people didn’t care just because the jokes were never directly at the expense of the victims as if that makes it ok ??? #that woman is still fucking alive. can you fucking imagine if she’d seen that like how that would feel #i’m fucking tired of teaching people basic human decency when it comes to true crime fuck you people #and don’t get me wrong what those guys are doing now IS scummy #but like ?? compared to fucking making their entire success of goofing about at real fucking crime scenes ???? they were always trash

[oroontheheels]

Personally I always thought Kuai Liang/Smoke were super cute. In old canon they were good friends who tried to escape being turned into cyborgs by their masters. And their friendship always looked kinda fruity. In a best way possible. And also the drama? Oh! Perfect.

In MK1 writers are obsessed with making everything as NO HOMO as possible. So now Kuai Liang and Tomas call each other BROTHER every 0,5 seconds. To make suuuuuure audience will not even THINK about shipping those two brotherly brother bros.

Yeah, ok, perverts. You did that.

But now I’m very interested in Bi-Han/Tomas. Because headcanons be running wild. Imagine one day your dad brings home cuuuuute boy around your age (a bit younger). And you instantly have a crush on him. But your homophobic dad insists that no, you are BROTHERS now and should be calling each other brothers and treat each other like brothers. Even though you are not related by blood. Your younger biological brother is ok with that, but you are not.

So later in life you are very angry and frustrated and you let your shitty homophobic dad die. Oh and also you hate how he runs business. So there’s 2 reasons.

I would be as angry as Bi-Han not gonna lie.

P.S. I don’t know exact age difference between Bi-Han and Tomas. I assume it’s just few years. But I guarantee NR Studio writers gonna see this post and say on Twitter that Tomas was 2 years old and Bi-Han was 20 when they first met. Mark my words. 😂

#bitomas #I’m just joking but like #can you imagine? #video games #mortal kombat

[rinrinlovee]

I hate you modern aesthetic I hate you monochrome I hate you rose gold I hate you painting kids’ toys to be joyless I hate you soulless white kitchens I hate you stainless steel I hate you exposed framing I hate you pristine white sofas I hate you parents who force their children to live in environments with no colour I hate you organised houses I hate you echoey houses I hate you perfectly cut emerald grass I hate you biscuit cutter houses I hate you conformity I hate you modern aesthetic I hate you modern aesthetic I hate you modern aesthetic I hate you modern aesthetic !!

#MAKE IT STOP #I WANT COLOUR #I want lived in houses !! #I want to trip over dolls and have blankets all over and have a painted kitchens I love you homely homes #I want to hear laughter and see footprints and little height markers on door frames I want to see that splatter on the ceiling #from when grandma dropped that pot of spaghetti I NEED to see signs of life and happiness and love #If I don’t see a thriving household with toys on the floor and chew marks on the furniture and dents in the walls and dishes in the sink #I AM GOING TO COMBUST #This aesthetic is the definition of soulless! A terrible threat to humanity! It needs to be eradicated immediately!! I directly attribute #how rude people are nowadays to the stark and complete lack of colour and soul in stores and jokes alike! #Whoever thought of this so called aesthetic is the devil’s best pawn!! #If I see one more house with children especially drowned in white and black I’m calling every child protective service imaginable #Few things boil my blood more than a parent forcing their child to live in such a horrid non stimulating cold freakishly clean environment #If I can hear my quiet breathing in your house #It needs to be cleansed if it’s modern aesthetic sin and injected with the borderline holy rays of WARM #Yes I did just watch a HORRIBLE VILE TERRIBLE video of some trendy yummy mummy painting her child’s lovely lavender play kitchen #BLOODY BLACK AND WHITE #to make it match her aesthetic! #what the fuck!! I call child abuse !

[lestatslestits]

#this is a joke #i’m not gonna do that #if only because i’m pretty sure he’s either going through something or thinking about ghosting #or maybe both #and i’m not gonna break my back figuring out which on my own #but can you imagine how funny it would be #by going through something i mostly mean #impulse adopting a dog

[nick-close]

Dndads fans when they see an abusive father (it is a reference to Willy Stampler)

#I’m not making a fucking wojack reaction those r so ugly #and I can’t think of a silly post #so you can imagine the rest of my joke #Pay me for better content /j #dndads #dungeons and daddies #dndads odyssey #Willy stampler #abuse mention #abuse ment

[deityofhearts]

every time someone thinks I’m younger than I am/younger than them i die a bit inside

#deity dialogue #I’m only sorta joking but it’s like damn bitch get your act together people think you’re younger than you are #i can only imagine it’s because I’m dumb of ass and a petty brat #and allegedly apparently have a baby face at least according to irls #hopefully it’s not ‘I thought you were younger (derogatory)’ #Y^Y

[anonymous-tals]

It’s been a while and I’ve yet again accrued a number of Arrested Development sketches that I haven’t done anything with to further their completion in a while, but like regardless and have decided to post because of that.

For context, the girl in the Van Halen t-shirt is a character I made up who Tony is friends with during his high school years. Her name is Stella Reed, and they become friends after she sees Tony perform a magic show at the school’s talent show(she’s also into magic).

This last one is from all the way back in January of this year. I meant to include it in my last sketch accruement thingy but I forgot. Maybe it’s something I’ll revive one day, maybe not. I ended up writing a more fleshed out story based on it, though, so I more likely on the not side. But I like the concept and drawing sooooo ta da.

#technically i did the wish i could be a bee drawing today but if I do anything further with that it’s not gonna be using this specific sket #i imagine tony to be very punk and outspoken if provoked as a teen #but then as he tried to become a famous magician #his image progressively got more sanitized and curated into the facade we saw him use in the early seasons #i love drawing little gob #someone in a discord server i’m in sent a picture of a store called ‘Gob Shops’ and i made the joke ‘you can have your very own gob’ #and that’s where the pet gob(parodying pet rocks) drawing came from #the ‘school’s a prison’ drawing of tony was inspired by one of david cross’ bits from his latest comedy show #he just did that during it it doesn’t have to do with the joke otherwise #but i thought why not mention it #gob bluth #will arnett #tony wonder #ben stiller #michael bluth #jason bateman #arrested development #arrested development fanart

[cynicalmusings]

‘the most crucial skill that a good drinksmith needs is listening… drinksmithing is all about having conversations with your guests’

tea house owner!reader energy for real

#my mind shot straight there when siobhan said this in the hsr event #hey guys #what if i just steal the concept of the event and write a continuation? #the reader does spy on people and accept bribes for jobs blah blah blah #but they also offer free therapy over tea! #(but only if they like the person if course) (everyone else is getting eavesdropped on) #…i started writing this as a joke but hey it could be fun #if i ever write a continuation of that fic i might do something like that #high cloud quintet members coming for therapy after baiheng dies #reader helping couples talk through problems in their relationship calmly #i’m a sucker for characters who are very elusive and sneaky and cold but when it comes to it have a heart of gold #‘yes i will expose your enemy’s business blah blah but hang on let me help this lost child find their parents first’ #‘oh you’re not being patient? you think your rivalry is more important than this child? actually you can keep the money and leave thank you #[turning to child] ‘now tell me where you last saw your parents’ #and with their connections from the various dealings they’ve had around the xianzhou they’d be really good at dealing with these situations #and with regards to the jing yuan aspect of things i firmly believe he needs somebody with kindness and warmth in them to fall for them #reader can’t all be bribery and dodgy deals #imagining him coming to the shop one day to get some information they’ve gathered or whatever #and they’re like ‘shush not now i’m hearing this girl vent about her shit partner’ #or doing something nice #and he falls even harder #sorry i have gone on an absolute tangent here #i don’t know what demon possessed me #maybe i will write a part two who knows #that reader would certainly be a fun one to flesh out #r’s random thoughts