#I’d say more nuanced stuff but I’m tired rn | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

robin-in-a-hoodie · 4 years

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I'm angry at terfs again but I won't actually respond to their posts rn because last time i did I've been told to die and that i am homophobic which usually i actually find funny how saying "trans women are women" and "lesbians love women" makes them angry, but other times it makes me actually want to die because mental health is much fun.

Anyway!

Why terfs are Terrible, a post: (this post is super binary because i don't feel like adding the nuances of nb stuff into this, i myself am nb and even explaining why i still call myself a lesbian is just. I don't want to. Not rn.)

Let me start by saying that if you are a lesbian and you personally don't want to date a woman with a dick, that's alright and valid. Hell, you can not want to date someone over their damn brow shape, if you don't want to be in a relationship with another person that's cool, just respectfully tell them no like you would anyone else you aren't attracted to for any reason.

This post is about terfs who feel comfortable telling me, a lesbian, lover of women and women alone that I can and should be attracted to trans men, or that if I (or any lesbian) is attracted to a trans woman, I am secretly not a lesbian.

It's a funny thing about terfs, really, how they insist that they are women, not just their vaginas, not just their parts, but their only definition of womanhood is... Vaginas and the rest of the female reproductive system.

Also funny how they cry "lesbians are not your porn! Our relationships are more than just sex!" (A wonderful statement i obviously agree with) but then turn around and say "the only thing, the absolutely only thing making you a lesbian is the desire to have sex with another pussy. It's literally only about sex, only about sex with other people of the same reproductive system."

Here's the thing: lesbians love women. We really do, women are hot, beautiful, breath taking, amazing, magnificent, women are awesome. They can be gnc, they can be butch, they can be tomboys, they can be anything, but they are women.

When i am attracted to a person, i don't know their parts in advance. I probably met many trans people and didn't know, i might have been attracted to trans women and didn't know. I don't know what they have between their legs without being either told or shown, and the same way i don't open every conversation with "hello i have a womb and a pussy", I'm pretty sure trans people don't either. I also believe this is a pretty common situation, when people meet someone they are attracted to they don't think "fuck her pussy is so hot" but "oh fuck she's hot"

Why would i, a lover of women, be attracted to a men? What about him will draw me in that i will look at and say "hell yeah, I'd like to date him!" Him having a female reproductive system? Do I date his uterus?

Assuming all lesbians who date trans women are secretly bi or straight requires one to assume many things;

- that all romantic relationships are sexual in nature

- that all sexual things require sex organs only, that there's no sex outside of vagina/dick, vagina/vagina or dick/dick

- that all lesbians are repulsed by dicks (i, personally, can't say I'm repulsed. I'm slightly weirded out but honestly I'm weirded out by feet and knees and that part of your back right under your neck? Also by vaginas a little bit but this isn't about me)

- all trans women have a dick

Now, if you think the two first ones I really do hope you wake up to the vest world of relationships and sex you are missing out on.

If you believe the third, please understand that other people have emotions and experiences that are not like your own. Some people feel differently about things, some people thing "all sex parts are weird what's the difference", some people think "dicks aren't my favourite but i don't mind them", some people think other things.

If you are a believer of the last one, have you... Known..... We are in the 21 century? Medical practices made it so that some trans women have vaginas. They are still trans, but now they have a vagina, haleluya.

Women are great. I love them. They have this something about them. This deep thing where they are just... Women. It's not in how they present themselves, it's not in their parts, it's just something so deep and hard to explain, i know a woman is a woman because she knows she's one, it comes from her and not from anything else. Manhood is similar to womanhood in that way, therefore if someone knows themselves to be a man i can't be into him. It doesn't draw me in the same way womanhood does.

Implying that i, as a lesbian, will find trans men attractive, is lesbophobic. It is assuming that the only thing i ever want in a relationship is traditional lesbian sex, that i can be attracted to a men, ever, because of something i wouldn't be able to know upon meeting him. It's insulting, i love women, strongly and loudly, simple as that. It's saying that i can assentialy love a men as long as i find the right one. It's also assuming all trans men have a vagina but that is beside the point.

I don't know where I'm going with this. Because of the jkr situation a lot of terfs came into my field of vision and so i was just thinking about this stuff a lot. I'm tired of hearing self proclaimed "feminists" say that I have to be a woman because i have a womb, that i as a lesbian can be attracted to men, that my trans sisters are somehow less of a woman because of some nonesense, and above all i fucking hate the audacity of terfs to tell women who love women that they aren't in a lesbian relationship. This is very rambly and messy and i don't have a point, I'm just fed up with terfs and their disgusting, homophobic, misogynistic bullshit. Women are more than their parts. Lesbians are more than sex.

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upwardeath · 6 years

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answer 11 questions, tag people and ask 11 questions (tagged by @lsfp @cognitionis-amor @venusian-prince @kishka) thanks dudes. I’m combing the first two sets of questions I was tagged in, and I gotta jet so can’t do them all rn

lsfp/cognition-amor questions:

1. What’s your favorite music genre/movie genre/book genre and why?

I guess alternative would be my favorite, I enjoy finding obscure or independent artists, I can spend hours on Spotify if I’m not careful. Movies, well I go for anything that combines drama and psychological. But I enjoy sci-fi and rom com as well, I’m a romantic. And yeah I get into all the typical Ni shit. I like classic lit a lot and apocalyptic/post apocalyptic/sci-fi books most.

2. Where do you see yourself five years from now? Ten years from now?

Funny you should ask, bc I’m currently very undecided about my future, I’m leaving the education field and leaning toward psychology, but I’m also considering a graphic design/advertising strategy role. But I’m fighting strong ‘fuck it’ inclinations atm. SO, 5 years from now, I hope to be settled somewhere that challenges me and also satisfies my passions. 10 years, happy and in control of that bitch, anger.

3. What’s a quality you always admire in others and never get tired of?

The ability to truly forgive, bc fuck if I could ever figure out how. Also, the ability to be vulnerable, because while I can be with a select few, it still kills me, but in the name of being authentic, I value it and want to get better at it.

4. What in the world/universe/human mind just ABSOLUTELY fascinates you?

How spirituality intersects with psychology. How physiology intersects with psychology/mental health. All psychology, how the brain works, neuroscience, sports strategy, relationships, love. Existentialism, anything ‘dark’ and mysterious. The idea of absolute truth.

5. Have you ever been proven wrong about a person’s character for the better?

Fuck yeah. There have been many times I was rubbed wrong by God knows whatever hunch I had at first. I find that no matter how good my magicalTM Ni/Se abilities are uwu (I’ll clarify right here bc I’ve been known to be misunderstood on this, but I’m very sarcastic and ironical when I say things like this), tert Fi can be a bitch when looping as it can be susceptible to using Te to support it’s schemes with Ni. And sometimes it can’t be trusted, but the more self-aware I become, the more obvious it becomes when this is happening, when I’m falsely basing my hunch on some shit-sensitive feeling I had. LOL. I’ve experienced the enemies to friends trope a couple of times actually. And I love it.

6. How do your favorite aesthetics make you feel and why? What aesthetic do you find rly ugly?

Connected to some deeper understanding and satisfied, because they put my inner world into something tangible. Ugly? LOL. Anything but my own uwu. Kidding, ummm, colors that clash, like I can’t explain it. I may have inf Se, but I think I have a decent eye. Shrug.

7. Would you kill someone?

Only in defense of others, and in a heartbeat if needed.

8. Who would you die for?

People I love, I think, but uh maybe not idk.

9. What method of suicide would you prefer? (Even if you aren't suicidal, please don't kill yourself cause i asked this oh my God). If someone killed you how would you probably get killed?

Gun to the head. If someone else killed me, I’d probably die because I didn’t back down to a threat of some sort. Likely some chaotic good scenario. I mean I do some crazy shit, but sp keeps me in check most of the time.

10. Is there hope for humanity?

Yes. But I hope I die before it ever comes time to test this theory. Like apocalyptic shit. But I hope God saves us from whatever fate we have in store. Actually, I hope I’m alive to save humanity tbh. Yeah I’m stupid I know.

11. On a scale of 1 to 10 how bad was the worst pain you ever felt?

I have a high pain tolerance so the scale is skewed imo. I guess that time I had my gut knifed open by... jk. Lol. I don’t know. I’m having a hard time remembering. As into extreme sports as I am, I surprisingly haven’t had too many injuries other than bruises and some broken bones which weren’t very painful. I’m very prepared for stuff like that and don’t put myself in situations I don’t think I can handle, and thanks to genetics I’m pretty good at that stuff. I think nagging pain is worse tbh, I’d rather get shit over with. So maybe tooth pain? Cause you feel it in your head and it makes you want to rip them out. I’ll give it a 7.

Venusian-prince questions:

1. do you believe in romantic soulmates, if so, multiple or just one?

Yeah, just one, and i also think your soulmate doesn’t have to be romantic.

2. thoughts on religion? do you practice anything?

Raised Christian, currently having an existential crisis, so no fucking clue what I believe, but i do know what i don’t believe.

3. believe in magic?

No, but the concept is cool.

4. describe your absolute perfect / idealized partner

Someone nicer than me and better at dealing with their emotions. But not in denial or devoid of them. xstp tbh. An edgy nerd. Someone who will do Se shit with me and also talk about interesting stuff. Someone who doesn’t poopoo my big emotions and crazy mind but also calls me out on shit. Someone hot.

5. what is a little quirk/nuance about you, that not a lot of people know?

Idk I’m tall. 5’11” to be exact. Yes I played basketball in college. I seem very serious, but I’m actually quite playful and I love to laugh, only with certain people of course.

6. what is the perfect weather for you, and why do you like it that way?

65 degrees. Dry. I sweat easily and I don’t love hot. Humidity sucks.

7. first thing you think about when you wake up? last thing you think about when you go to bed? (be honest!!!!)

I need to pee and i wish i could sleep longer. Sex and i hate myself.

8. name something about yourself you highly value & appreciate

My advice-giving abilities, my passion.

9. have any regrets? if so, why?

I regret hurting some loved ones with my anger. Ugh. Why, bc my anger/pain is no excuse.

10. how do you deal with your negative emotions?

Drink them away when disintegrating/gripping. I punch the hell out of my punching bag, workout. Drive/walk around at all hours of the night brooding. Writing. Drawing. EMDR therapy. Talk therapy. Talking with this one person. Or I just don’t deal.

11. have you ever been obsessive / addicted to anything?

Chapstick, salsa, I’m probably addicted to coffee. I obsess over trying new beer/whiskey. I wax the hair off my arms obsessively.

My questions (I’m yoinking some from others):

1. Names you find beautiful?

2. What’s a song that embodies you as a person best?

3. Do you have any weird/out-there theories? What are they if I may ask?

4. Do you have a favorite enneagram/mbti type?

5. What’s the thing that annoys you most?

6. Where would you live if you could choose one place in the world?

7. What are your hobbies?

8. What are your religious beliefs, if any?

9. Do you like pizza? Yes or no?

10. Do you have any vices and what are they?

11. What’s something random you were thinking about today?

not gonna tag anyone cause I think most have been tagged already

#about me #long post

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