#I didn’t really throw izuru in here that much haha

[fuwahiko]

Ok more fluff coming your way because i throw it all on Hajime mans needs a break. Imagine a Non-Despair au where Izuru is a real person and Hajime's twin, they go to Hope's Peak. Izuru in the Main Course and Hajime in the Reserve Course.

Class 77 plan a get-together outside of school because they wanted to...and Chisa said to get together outside of school. Izuru is...not feeling social so he decides to bring Hajime along. He didn't tell anyone he was bringing his brother, but they'll learn when he shows up.

So fast forward to The Hang Out, and all of class 77 are waiting for Izuru. They're not surprised because Izuru is Izuru and he does not like socializing. They're all chatting and laughing at TeruTeru getting his ass chewed out by Mahiru when Izuru comes in and...he's hanging off of someone with short choppy hair and green eyes? Whomst? Izuru doesn't have friends outside of them who beith this man?

"Izuru what the hell, you forgot to tell them about me?!" "...oh, it seems so. Sorry Haji."

So Izuru introduces his brother because he FORGOT to tell his class about Hajime. Everyone's nice to him, even Nagito because he's got a hope boner for Izuru Kamukura aka Ultimate Hope man.

Fuyuhiko goes up and says "hi" because if Peko can try to socialize, so can he. Hajime smiles and says hi back, and that's that. Fuyuhiko goes back to his antisocial wall, and Hajine goes back to being Izuru's emotional support pillar. Literally.

But they're both flushed. Fuyuhiko's eyebrows are furrowed and Hajime's biting his lips. They steal glances at each other when the other isn't looking. Fuyuhiko and Hajime are both thinking, "Oh no cute boy."

And LET THE MUTUAL PINING, TSUNDERE ACTIONS, AND CLASS 77 SHENANIGANS COMMENCE. With wingwoman Peko, insgigator Natsumi on both sides, and Izuru being the overprotective brother that he is.

yessss pining boys!! without having like... the reasons they had in the game to talk to each other, how does one approach a cute boy (tm)? when both you and the cute boy (tm) are so awkward and have such difficulty getting chatting, what do you do?

imagining Peko as a wingwoman is really cute and kinda amusing too because she’s y’know, sort of awkward too and sometimes struggles to keep conversations going and stuff so I imagine there’d probably be some moments where Peko is trying her best to help Fuyuhiko by starting a conversation with Hajime so she can bring Fuyuhiko into it as well but maybe it’s a sort of unusual topic or she doesn’t really give Hajime much to work with so it kinda flops at first and Fuyuhiko’s concerned that it’s not gonna go anywhere, but then Peko ends up saying something that Hajime finds funny (even though there’s a 95% chance that Peko wasn’t intending to be funny) and that allows for the conversation to open up more and become a lot easier.

Hajime and Fuyuhiko end up keeping the conversation going for a few minutes, but they’re both still pretty flustered and they keep getting overwhelmed and distracted (cute boy!! omg!!) so they end up struggling and the conversation dies out again. just then Izuru spots them and comes over again to butt in and latch onto Hajime and Fuyuhiko uses it as an opportunity to head off and escape the awkwardness. Hajime gets irritated with Izuru for scaring Fuyuhiko off but is also honestly a little relieved because he wouldn’t have wanted to make things even more awkward by just letting the silence between them carry on for who knows how long.

the get together ends without them getting the chance to talk any more than that, but even so they both find that they just can’t stop thinking about each other in the days that follow. it’s been several days already but Fuyuhiko still gets distracted in class thinking about how cute Hajime’s big bright smile was and the sound of his laugh, how soft his hair looked, how big his arms were compared to his own. Hajime finds himself sitting on his bed and hugging his pillow to his chest as he thinks about Fuyuhiko’s pretty eyes, his cute freckles, and how surprisingly friendly and sweet he’d been in contrast to his intimidating aura (which Hajime also found very attractive, of course). there’s a lot of covering cheeks with hands, lowering heads to hide soft expressions and a hell of a lot of times where somebody is trying to get Hajime’s or Fuyuhiko’s attention but they might as well be talking to a brick wall because they’re both so distracted by their thoughts that they’re completely lost to the world.

Natsumi notices all of this from both of them and finds it hilarious (and pretty adorable, she has to admit) and even though she does think Hajime is sort of lame she knows her brother is genuinely really into him and... well, he’s not that bad, right? yeah, okay, he’s actually pretty alright... so why not give them both a little shove in the right direction?

problem is, they’re both completely useless.

she makes several attempts at trying to encourage them to do something about all these god damn butterflies and fluffy pink hearts that are practically radiating from them both, but nothing works. she gives up. a few more days pass and... nothing changes. they’re both so god damn annoying. Hajime lets out his 200th dreamy sigh in class (which is a lot less discreet than Hajime thinks it is) and Natsumi almost loses it. she has to do something about this.

the next day she asks Hajime to meet her in a quiet spot just outside of school when classes are over, she tells him she wants to talk about something. Hajime doesn’t really get what the deal is but he figures he’ll just go along with it rather than questioning her and making a fuss.

after school he goes to wait in the spot (Natsumi says she needs to do something else quickly first and tells Hajime to go ahead) but when he gets there... he sees Fuyuhiko is there waiting for him?!

Hajime stops dead in his tracks, freezing up and struggling to even breathe properly, and when Fuyuhiko looks up and realises Hajime is there he tenses up and balls his hands into fists at his sides. they stare at each other for a moment, their cheeks burning up as they process the situation, and then as soon as Fuyuhiko is able to kick his brain into gear again he realises exactly what is going on. he scrunches his face up, still bright red, though Hajime doesn’t notice yet. “god damn it, Natsumi!” his voice is loud, making Hajime jump a little, but it’s also sort of shaky.

“oh uh- I was supposed to meet her here- I-”

Fuyuhiko sighs. “yeah, me too. she did this on purpose. she was trying to get both of us here because she knows that-” he cut himself off, suddenly realising what he was about to say. out loud. to Hajime.

“huh? knows that what?” Hajime couldn’t figure out what Natsumi could possibly want from this that Fuyuhiko would know of. the only reason he could imagine was because she knew about his crush on Fuyuhiko and probably wanted to play some kind of prank, but that couldn’t be it because how would Fuyuhiko know why she’d called him there?

it was then that Hajime noticed that Fuyuhiko was turning away and avoiding eye contact. wait... is he blushing? what would cause him to blush in a situation like this? hang on a second...

slowly Hajime started to piece the situation together... but he must be imagining things, right? there has to be some other explanation. but he couldn’t help but cling onto that little thought, that maybe Fuyuhiko was also interested, even if it was silly to ever think that that could be the case. he wanted to test his theory out without giving himself away, and in the moment the best he could manage was some awkward joke. of course.

“hey... isn’t this kinda like when two characters in a romance anime meet up outside of school to confess or something?”

Fuyuhiko has a small coughing fit. he recovers after a moment and adjusts his tie, finally looking back at Hajime again. “huh?!”

Hajime panics and nervously searches for somewhere else to look so he doesn’t have to meet Fuyuhiko’s intense eyes. “n-nothing! I was just joking around! I uh- I thought it’d uh-” he feels like his cheeks are about to catch fire. he wants to run away but his legs won’t move an inch.

Fuyuhiko lets out a breathy laugh. “you’re so weird.”

Hajime looks up again and is surprised to see Fuyuhiko’s expression is much softer than expected, and though he keeps glancing up at Hajime he’s also struggling and looking around awkwardly as well. suddenly Hajime catches a look in Fuyuhiko’s eyes and they find themselves staring at each other for a moment. Hajime sees that he really wasn’t imagining it; Fuyuhiko’s face is very red right now. he realises that Fuyuhiko has noticed that his face is also red. he must have done. there’s no way he could possibly miss it. oh god.

there’s a long pause.

Fuyuhiko swallows and takes a moment to clear his throat.

“well anyway, since we’re here, do you want to... hang out sometime?”

Hajime’s eyes widen in surprise. he isn’t even able to process the question before Fuyuhiko continues speaking.

“I just mean because you’re my sister’s classmate n’ all I figure we should try to get along and-”

“y-yeah, sure. uh, I’d like that actually.” Hajime doesn’t realise he’s cut Fuyuhiko off until he’s already spoken.

there’s another pause, and then maybe a couple more minutes of them arranging a time and place to meet up in a few days while trying not to lose it and just turn to a big pile of mush out of embarrassment, and then they awkwardly part ways.

as Hajime turns to leave he thinks he hears something rustling in a bush nearby but figures it must be his imagination so he just ignores it and continues on his way.

Natsumi heads back home, a couple of small leaves stuck in her hair, giggling to herself. today would go down as one of the greatest successes of the ultimate little sister.

#kuzuhina #ask #thank you for the ask!! #I didn’t really throw izuru in here that much haha #but I very much enjoy the idea of him being hajime’s twin and being clingy and overprotective #it’s very cute #I didn’t bring the rest of class 77 into it either so woops #my brain can only handle writing about so many characters at once lmao #anyways I loved writing this omg #natsumi is a legend #we love and stan #oh yeah also this one is extra long so #long post #probs good to add that tag lol #dr2 spoilers

[paipayaseeds]

he felt his breath hitch as he saw the female lunge for him, heart dropping into his stomach.

Haiyato's initial reaction was to run. run as far away as he could from the woman as possible, no matter how much his heart ached or his body screamed at him to stop, but it had all been washed away as he was knocked over by her, feet and hands pinned on to the ground.

he could feel his breathing speed up, shaky and hard, but quick and cold breaths entering just as fast as they were leaving, and something bubbled up and through his chest.

so it was only natural a loud and clear laugh filled the air while his previously unscathed skin was being scraped and cut.

his brightly shining eyes that were always filled with dull disinterest and determination were clouded with a different emotion. although hazy, you could see it in his eyes as he laughed with the woman on top of him.

"Akane!" he exclaimed, smile wider than before as his pinned limbs trembled, "i thought you were dead, haha!! though i wouldn't have minded, as it would have brought me the-- the greatest despair! just like when i saw Hope's Peak burning to the ground--just like when i saw our classroom blow up into smithereens, HAHA!"

despair despair despair despair despair despair

"you must be wanting to kill me, huh?? you must think that "oh, Enoshima hadn't brainwashed Fuyuno, so i have to kill him or immobilize him so he can fall into despair as well"! but, Enoshima has everything planned out. she knows everything,"

despair despair despair despair despair despair

"the moment i saw our classroom blow up was the moment i could taste what true despair was like! hahahahahAHAHAHAHAHA-"

throwing his head back in laughter was a bad idea, as his head had hit the rocky, cemented ground. his words had fallen out like scripted words in a movie, this situation was just like scripted scenes in a movie, his acting was just like in the movies.

but was he even acting anymore? he couldn't even tell.

all he could feel was despair.

"and--" he swallowed, "surely- surely others would want to feel the adrenaline rush of this sweet, sweet despair!"

his plan was to confuse Akane, but at this point, he was just confusing himself. was his goal to escape or to inflict? did he really feel the deepest despair, and would he want to feel it again? did he get a high from things being snatched away from him and destroyed?

but what was there to snatch and destroy if he already had nothing?

he closed his eyes, readying himself for impact as the girl above him raised her fists.

maybe his speech wasn't convincing enough. he was thinking all night, so of course his acting would be off somehow. what if, despite his acting, she would still bring him to Enoshima? then what would happen to Iris? where would he go?

he could feel himself laugh at his thoughts, but whether he was laughing at the incoming fists or the fact that this situation brought despair was unknown to Akane.

Iris would be fine. he thought.

the sounds of flowing water filled his senses.

{{ tag anon; um, so, i'm not sure whether or not it's okay for me to control characters you're playing, so i left whatever is happening in Akane's head up to you?? i semi-controlled her here, and i'm not sure if that's alright with you or not, so if you want me to write another reply, i'm okay with that! :) }}

Izuru found interest bubbling up in his chest as he listened to Haiyato’s performance, though at the same time, repulsion. He could recognize the feigned emotion of despair, but even if it was feigned, he didn’t seem to enjoy the sound of it. But for a semi-second he almost had been fooled by the actor; the emotion in his voice sounded too real for it to be fake. But perhaps that’s just how experienced he is in his job, it’s to be expected; seeing as how that was his ultimate. 

Akane hesitated for a moment, his reaction to her attack left her speechless for a split second. Despite being fooled by his performance, her fists that had been hovering just above his face resumed their pace; if he had truly fallen into despair, he wouldn’t mind just a little more of it, right? And not just that, all the wait had only made her more excited to beat the pulp out of this kid.

Izuru tuned out Haiyato’s laughter as he made his way towards the two, an unknown urgency in his step. He didn’t seem to realize what he had been doing until he kicked the girl away from the boy on the ground, right before she could even lay another finger on the hysterical Haiyato. Ignoring the conflict in his head, Izuru decided he’d think about his strange actions later. 

For now, he had to get Haiyato out of danger. 

Not seconds after he had pulled her attention away from Haiyato, had the girl immediately decided to lunge at Izuru again; this time, her despairful expression had been cruelly mixed in with excitement. Izuru stifled the urge to roll his eyes, preparing himself for the incoming attack. 

Izuru’s eyes turned to slits as he dodged and countered Akane’s attacks, he took note of the reckless and brute attack pattern. Her attacks were just barely thought through, though it was clear most of her punches and attempts to disable Izuru had been out of pure instinct. The look on her face shown pure despair, pure determination to fight Izuru despite knowing she’d lose.

Izuru’s red eyes gleamed as he caught an opportunity, a weakness that would end the ‘fight’- more like a beatdown. With calculated and composed dodges and hits, Izuru somehow got Akane pinned to the ground with his foot on her neck. Letting out a short breath, he found himself staring at her with pity; it had taken him less than a second to incapacitate her. How boring.

Mind you, he had done all this whilst holding Haiyato’s jacket— in which, he also hadn’t given Akane the chance to touch. (I'm sorry for the fixation on the jacket, I just- HBJASBKJASHDBJKSDBJK)

As a despair, he would’ve thought she would be more dangerous, but she just seemed more reckless. More eager to fight, perhaps even more eager to lose. It sickened him.

Pressing down on her neck harder with his heel, he stared down at her helpless, struggling form with displeased eyes. Another hopeless puppet of Junko. It was boring sure, but it also brewed up a feeling of irritation in the man’s chest. It nearly offended him to even be touching something so despairful. 

Recalling Haiyato’s words from earlier, he muttered quietly to himself, whether Haiyato heard him or not, Izuru wouldn’t have cared. “Were you that suicidal to a point where you’d be willing to be killed by a brute despair like this?” He gestured to the woman he had pinned on the ground with his mere shoe, head tilting back to look at the man on the ground. His words were quick, gaze filled with pity, and an unwanted hair of concern. 

He spoke as if Akane wasn’t there, to begin with; as if she was irrelevant and it was just the two. Just.. the two?

Izuru felt disinterested once again. Sighing, he turned his attention back onto the struggling despair he immobilized; ready to finish the job, he pressed down harder, ignoring the choked gasps for air she let out. 

(IRIS WOULD VERY NOT BE FINE OH MY GOD HOLYYY HDFSHJGVSDKJHG

ALSO SORRY FOR THE WAIT, THERE WAS JUST SDBJKSDHBV I HAVE NO SELF CONTROL)

#mod chia #rp #tag anon #NONA G A T

[mediioxumate]

send  🌻 and i’ll talk about whatever! || @offiiciium  || accepting!

🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻 🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻

🌻 - break no fucking mercy run i guess asdjkfhaksfd so uuuhhh yeets under a cut so no one hates me ajksfdhalksdf

🌻 - much like with fenrich, i have yet to start watching nge but i’m already down to give everything to shinji ikari which is impressive, you are so powerful. 

🌻 - i’m excited about it bc similar to dr i have somehow managed to avoid ?? most spoilers, i know some memes and stuff here and there

🌻 - more dr3 thoughts because i have a lot. i don’t love the amount of faked out deaths, it’s a little overdone. especially that they’ve used it SPECIFICALLY on the survivors so they know we’re attached, it feels cheap. 

🌻 - also chiaki shouldn’t be there like i love her but it LITERALLY makes no sense, and I know some of the spoilers about her and chisa. but also her entire interactions with hajime in the beginning are so good and just punched me in the how much i love that ship tbh.

🌻 - similar vein, i want to write up formal posts, but i feel like the dr3 falling to despair explanations don’t line up to me. as far as i’m concerned, there’s a solid base for every sdr2 character to be exploited - all of them are unhappy or unsatisfied in some way or another - and in particular, it’s heavily tied to their talents. getting master manipulator junko involved, and exploiting that bitterness towards hope’s peak, it doesn’t seem like a stretch to have her exploit those tensions to her advantage.

🌻 - oh also hagakure’s design glow up in dr3 almost makes me want to care him. almost. i do wish they’d do something with his character other than make him stupid but alas. 

🌻 - i want more toko. just in general. her character has so much potential and i felt like we started to get it in UDG and then the game was OVER and that’s just horrible. she deserves so much. and to kiss komaru a lot. 

🌻 - on the topic of UDG tho i am SICK of the little green bitch!! done with her!! can i get five LESS i’m OVER it!!!!

🌻 - i really need to read the mukuro novel, i’m very curious about her, she seems like such an interesting character but i haven’t touched her much yet. i also wanna read dr0 or at least a summary. i’ve never had a hyperfixation ever in my entire life. 

🌻 - i started playing dr2 on my phone at lunch today and i have to say the phone interface is way better than i expected! they take up a stupid amount of space and are 100% worth it lol

🌻 - i love playing imessage games but i am so bad at them i lose ALL the time lol, my current kick is battleship, but can go for darts, chess, and filler!!

🌻 - my Anxiety phone game is solitaire - it gives me something to do with my hands to help me pay attention. 

🌻 - my Mindless game is arknights when i’m farming! just throw on auto deploys while i watch things or draw or write haha

🌻 - i also play lovenikki, which is my before bed game.

🌻 - maybe video games own my life more than previously calculated 

🌻 - on theme, i’ve been thinking about finally properly finishing pokemon shield, i finished most of the main story but i have caught legendary buppo yet and i need to ksjfhasjlkfd

🌻 - my favorite pokemon are stufful and furret and noibat and ninetales!! i have a type. fire types are my personal niche and favorite!!

🌻 - my first tumblr rpc was pokemon!! i think my love of fire types started when i wrote chili, but i also wrote jasmine, mei, and an oc!

🌻 - i also used to have a few harvest moon OCs in a harvest moon rp group!! i miss them... one day i will revamp them, they’re good kids - laura and kinta were the names :0 

🌻 - my favorite harvest moon game is magical melody but specifically with the game cube add on that let you port in the mineral town characters, absolutely top tier!! i miss playing it so much. second fave is harvest moon ds. in both of these i marry ann bc i’m predictable. 

🌻 - close second for a wonderful life! it was my first harvest moon game and it meant i could marry celia over and over and over and over again. i love her. she’s so good. another wonderful life sucked bc the bachelors were shit. give me the same quality as the women or perish. but hmds cute was good, i love the mineral town boys 

🌻 - i didn’t know stardew valley could be multi player but i think it can be so i think someone should play with me 

🌻 - i made a joke that izuru kamukura is just mew two and now i physically can’t stop thinking about it

#yes this took me all day stfu #im no thoughts head empty #;munday #;ooc

[magioftheseas]

Lonely Existence

KamuKoma Week Day 7: komaeda's birthday!

Summary: Kamukura's sent to give Komaeda a birthday present and spends the day with him while everyone else is out.

Rating: G

Warnings: None, really. Aside from like...language? Thanks Matsuda.

Notes: Last fic for the week! Yeeeeeeeah, I did it! Of course I included more Matsuda. MatsuKamuKoma is love and life although it’s still largely KamuKoma focused, haha. This is bittersweet fluff, I suppose?

***Alternate Ao3 Link***

Commission? Donate?

It had been as uninteresting a day as any. He was content to do nothing about it, and indeed, because it was Sunday, he predicted such would be the case. However, that did not happen.

“Hey, Kayako. Get the hell up.” A few snaps overhead. “Up, up. I know you’re actually awake, you fucking brat.”

Despite the snarling, he’s of course unbothered. His eyes do open however it is leisurely and Matsuda’s scowl deepens as it looms over him. His face is pinched up in a special kind of annoyance. Ah.

“Something happened,” he said. “Inconvenient, I presume?”

“Stupid plane bullshit. I have to go pick up some ugly bitch before they call animal control.” Matsuda sighed heavily, raking his fingers through his hair. “Someone else would’ve done it, but she’s running late and she contacted me. I’m really not in a good mood right now. I have a favor that needs to be done.”

With that, he lightly smacks Kamukura’s forehead with a wrapped up book.

“This is for Komaeda Nagito in Class 77-B. Thankfully for you, he’s the only idiot in the class still on campus because the rest of them fucked off to some photogenic resort for someone else’s birthday. He was sick so he couldn’t go with. He’s probably depressed but is going to keep on smiling like a fucking idiot so make sure this gets to him?”

“You did not strike me as the type to prepare presents, Matsuda Yasuke,” Kamukura said lowly. “Is this retribution, then?”

“Yeah, it is. He bought me something I couldn’t find anywhere else.” Matsuda rolled his eyes. “Don’t make this fucking weird. It’s only courtesy to buy something for someone in return. I know you should have some basic idea of what that is.”

“...hmph.” He pushes himself up, but takes the gift anyway. “How boring. There is no value in celebrating a day merely for one birth of many.”

“If you’re jealous then I can have you registered for your own birthday.” A pause. “Or you can take Hinata’s. It’s not like he’s really using it anymore.”

“Such trifles do not concern me.”

“Of course they don’t. Well, either way, I expect you to deliver it. Or else I’ll draw on your face while you sleep.”

“...”

“And cut your hair too, while I’m at it.”

“Understood. It will be delivered immediately.”

“Awesome.” Matsuda seemed satisfied enough, turning on his heel to head out with a pop of some joints. He stopped for a moment. “I’m not going to be back until late tonight. The train ride to the airport is obnoxiously far and the flight is probably going to get delayed again, knowing what I’m dealing with. That’s not even accounting for the other bullshit I’ll definitely get saddled with along the way. Whatever. If you get lonely or something...”

Kamukura stared at him blankly.

“Well. You could do worse. Just saying. All the same. Ciao.”

With a wave of his hand, he stepped out. Kamukura finally scoffed.

--

Such trifles did not concern him in the slightest. But it was not often he left his room. It was even less so that Matsuda Yasuke requested his services. He often only ever did what the researchers told him to do, and whenever Matsuda Yasuke told him to do anything, it was often...less than menial. Always detached.

“Stand still.”

“Don’t whine so much.”

“Relax.”

“You will accomplish many wonderful things, Kamukura Izuru-kun,” the researchers would crow.

Komaeda Nagito hadn’t believed that at all. Not in the slightest.

“Hope can’t be born in a lab,” he would say, breathily and brimming with straining emotion. “Just what were they thinking?”

The answer had been obvious. Apparent. Boring. Komaeda Nagito had just gotten more irritated with him.

Komaeda Nagito...is irritable as Matsuda Yasuke. Around myself. And no one else.

It shouldn’t matter. He doesn’t care. It’s boring. Everything is boring.

“With an attitude like that, you really aren’t going to make any friends,” Matsuda had said once, tone dull and eyes on his manga instead of Kamukura.

Boring.

“You say that but it’s human nature to be social, y’know.”

So boring.

“You can’t seriously expect me to believe you’re not at least a little lonely.”

Boring, boring, boring.

Such concerns were mere trifles. And yet, the crinkling of wrapping under his tightening grip cuts through those thoughts as if they were nothing. Kamukura lightens it as to not damage the gift, and keeps his eyes straight ahead. He walks until he sees the fluttering of birds. His pace does not quicken. He maintains a leisure stride.

Komaeda Nagito is crouched low. He has a remaining, crumpled half of melon bread in one hand, and is spreading crumbs with the other. The birds pick at them. One has nested into his hair.

“You know,” Kamukura finds himself saying. “That provides very little nutritional value.”

“Good morning to you too, Kamukura-kun,” Komaeda replies, without even looking at him. “Out for a walk on this fine day? It’s good luck, isn’t it, to have such lovely weather.”

“No.”

“Well, alright.” Komaeda’s laugh is soft, strained at edges that would’ve been indiscernible to anything less than Kamukura Izuru’s sharp ears. “I mean, I think it is. And with the rest of my class gone, it’s quiet. Relaxed. Not that I prefer being without them, but... They can be noisy.”

“Mm.” It is mildly irritating how Komaeda Nagito is willfully oblivious to the gift in Kamukura’s hands. How it has yet to be acknowledged. Kamukura twitched a little before throwing all caution to the wind and thrusting it forward. “Matsuda Yasuke asked me to give this to you.”

The birds all flee, leaving a flurry of feathers. One even gets stick in Komaeda’s hair. Komaeda, who just blinks blearily at the gift, before nodding and taking it.

“Aha. Haha.” He doesn’t sound terribly enthused, shuffling it rather hurriedly into his bag. “Matsuda-kun...so kind. Please tell him I send my highest regards. He must be quite busy today.”

“Yes. He is.”

“I see.” Komaeda nods again. “Well, then, you can get going now, Kamukura-kun.”

He says nothing to that.

“I can’t imagine that my company is terribly stimulating, so I shall not bother you further.” Komaeda finally stands, brushing himself off. “If you won’t leave, I will. You can have this spot if you want it so badly.”

“I do not want anything.” The words slip before he can stop them. And for once, a twinge is in his features. Hm. “How are you?”

Komaeda still hasn’t picked the feather from his hair. He also still hasn’t looked at him directly.

“I don’t know why you would care.”

“Of course not,” he said. “But I still asked.”

Komaeda’s lips twist before pulling into a smile.

“Fine, of course. Nothing to concern your oh so talented self with. As I said before, the weather is lovely. Atmosphere serene. My classmates are surely enjoying themselves greatly without my worthless presence to dampen their high spirits. Why would I be anything less than fine?”

One reason is obvious.

“You’re lonely.”

“Eh?” Komaeda laughs, more taken aback then amused. “What was that?”

He reaches out and swiftly plucks out the feather.

“You are lonely,” he says simply. “That much is clear. Despite how often you allow yourself to be isolated, you are still plagued by feelings of lonesomeness. How boring. How predictable.”

Komaeda blinks, eyes darting between the feather twirling around between his fingers and Kamukura’s own unmoved and stoic gaze.

Komaeda’s smile twitches; there’s a forceful tug at its corners.

“I didn’t think you cared enough to comment.” His smile widens, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. “It’s human nature to get lonely. But it’s for the best. My feelings don’t matter as long as the others can shine. Nothing is more important nor as wonderful.”

“Those are quite the flimsy justifications,” he pointed out.

“Mm, I don’t expect someone like you to understand. Kamukura-kun is all cold logic and rationale.” That smile doesn’t drop even as those eyes narrow sharply. “You wouldn’t know the first thing about being human. I feel sorry for you.”

Sorry?

“It’s not like you asked to exist, after all, it was all that insolent reserve. You really are pitiful, Kamukura-kun. Nothing drives you at all.” Komaeda steps aside. “What are you even living for? I wonder if someone like you is dissatisfied even with existing. Well.” He paused. “It’s not like I’d understand how that would be like.”

Kamukura lets him brush past. But it is not long before he finds himself turning on his own heel and trailing after him. Komaeda doesn’t look back, which is expectable. He’s not the type to do so even when being followed.

Neither of them say anything.

--

“Do you understand your purpose?”

“...”

“You’re going to be the ultimate symbol of hope, Kamukura Izuru-kun!”

“Wrong. I am a tool for your disposal. A symbol of power and of influence. The product of a boastful legacy.”

“No, that’s not...”

“You cannot fool me.”

“...hah. I suppose I can’t.”

--

Komaeda Nagito busied himself with humble leisure activities. Walking, admiring the paintings and sculptures throughout campus, relaxing near the gardens, watching the frogs and turtles in the pond, checking out books at the library, sitting by the windows and listening to people practicing in the music room. It was much, as if Komaeda Nagito were restless, but nothing eventful occurred.

Even when Komaeda Nagito got himself coffee from the vending machine, there was a single can dispensed. Komaeda Nagito paused at this, and purchased another.

“Here,” he huffed, tossing it to Kamukura. “You must get thirsty, too.”

“I am as sustained the necessary amount,” was the reply. “This is unnecessary.”

“Aah, is that so?” Komaeda pops open the can, lashes lowering over his unimpressed stare. “Well, I suppose I shouldn’t have expected any different.”

He tilts his head back as he drinks. And he downs it quickly, Adam’s apple bobbling with each swallow.

Kamukura still opens and sips from his own can. It’s surprisingly bitter, and yet his expression gives nothing away. As per usual.

“You know,” Komaeda says. “Even though you have every talent, making the possibilities endless, it feels like even less happens when you’re around.” He chuckles, swirling around his drink. “Is that just your luck?”

“It could very well be, I suppose.”

How boring. Even though Komaeda Nagito’s life is plagued by extremities, they are circumvented by my presence alone. That really is so...

“Boring...”

“It is, but for someone like me you could call it a blessing,” Komaeda murmured. “To have a mundane day pass by, it’s akin to having a normal life, farcical and fleeting as it may be.”

“How dull it must be to long for normalcy,” Kamukura hummed. “You really are a boring person.”

“It was nice,” Komaeda said, firmer than before. “Even if it was because of you. Even if it’s you, I’m still...thankful, Kamukura-kun.”

He hmphed at that, but Komaeda kept talking.

“Living a normal life together really wouldn’t be so bad. Simply being allowed to exist without being excessively punished and rewarded for it—do you think that’s a privilege?”

“A privilege...” The thought does give him pause. He mulls it over, and then, he finds he has no answer. “What a thing to ask.”

“I guess it’s pretty strange to wonder, especially if you’re going to Hope’s Peak,” Komaeda laughed. “But when you weren’t talking, I almost could’ve pretended we were friends and that was even stranger...”

“...because you are lonely.”

“Perhaps. I don’t really want to think about it. My mind goes haywire easily.” He finishes up his coffee. “But, all the same, I don’t really feel lonely right now.”

“Because I am here.”

Komaeda just laughs.

“Perhaps, perhaps. Is it the same for you, Kamukura-kun?”

Is it?

He doesn’t think; the answer that forms is immediate.

“It is not.”

It is immediate—and distasteful.

“Aha, understandable.” Komaeda hurriedly looks away, and his ears are red. “Someone like me makes for poor company.”

“It is not because of you.” Kamukura frowns. “That much I am certain of.”

Komaeda laughs again, but this time the sound is strained. Anxious. It strikes an unpleasant cord.

“I think...” The words trail off into a hard swallow. “I’m going back to my dorm, to open Matsuda-kun’s present and take a look at it.”

Komaeda almost stumbles when he steps away, pausing only to toss his empty can. He glances over his shoulder, but it’s only slightly, only so that he can catch the smallest of glimpses of Kamukura in his glassy gaze. He gives a courteous wave and a barely perceptible smile.

“I’ll see you, Kamukura-kun. Perhaps.”

“Perhaps,” he merely echoed.

Komaeda practically scurried away after that. Kamukura sees him nearly stumble, but he does not fall. He watches until the other is gone. He waits until he can no longer hear that quickened heartbeat without focusing, and downs the rest of his coffee.

It really is bitter.

--

“You’re really miserable, huh? Well, it’s not any of my concern, but...”

“You are commenting, nonetheless.”

“Yeah. Suppose I am.” Matsuda rolled his eyes. “Maybe because it pisses me off a little.”

There’s nothing to say to that.

“Maybe you should just try and go out more often, it’s not like you’re unable to leave,” Matsuda huffs. “If you just did—anything—you’d be miles better than you are now.”

“There is no point in doing anything when the results yielded are predictable and boring.”

“Factually wrong, dumbass. You know that. So what the hell are you so stubborn about?”

He does not answer that either.

“Geez, if I didn’t know any better, I’d say that you just wanted to remain inhuman and miserable. Or maybe you’re afraid.”

“That is...” He stops himself. “False.”

“Huh.” Matsuda whistled. “All that talent—and you’d think you’d be a better fucking liar.”

--

He finds himself knocking on the door. The back of his fist strikes it thrice, all intervals in-between the same length. He’s aware that it’s fairly recent from the coat of paint. He would not be surprised if Komaeda Nagito had lost a door to bad luck.

“Mm? Coming.” It’s a soft and muffled call. It does not take long for the door to creak open, and though Komaeda Nagito appears with a smile, it falls in confusion. “Kamukura-kun? It’s...barely into sunset.”

“You were born around this time, correct?” he asks. Komaeda raises a brow.

“I wouldn’t...know if I was.”

“You were. So, then, take this. For your birth.” He holds out the small box, wrapped in a ribbon. “It is a cake. It should be suited to your tastes.”

Komaeda takes it, eyes wide.

“Aha... Haha... Um. Am I dreaming?”

“No. You are not.” He shakes his head. “It is most certainly not a dream.” He frowns. “Do you not want it?”

He can see how conflicted and how twisted Komaeda’s expression gets. How his eyes crinkle at the edges and are, albeit briefly, on the brink of tears. Tears that could have been either joy or grief. Komaeda’s emotions swung wildly, as one would expect from someone who lived so tumultuously.

And yet, this person was still standing, even as his knees quaked.

“You do not have to eat it right away,” Kamukura says, perhaps so that Komaeda perks rather than collapses. “However it will deteriorate in a matter of time. Please do enjoy it before then.”

“I... Mm.” Komaeda nodded quickly, lips pressed tightly together. “O-Okay. Thank you, Kamukura-kun.”

“It is nothing.” And yet, it felt so strangely significant. How strange. So strange. “I shall be seeing you.”

Komaeda tugs on his sleeve before he can turn. Kamukura stares, both at his trembling, pitiful grip, and the twitching, twisting expression. Slowly, it morphed from troubled to—something else.

“Thank you, Kamukura-kun.”

It wasn’t a smile. It wasn’t a frown either. All it was—was heartrendingly sincere.

“Thank you... Really.” He squeezes that small bit of fabric of Kamukura’s sleeve before pulling away. Just like that, he gives an easy smile that conveyed nothing at all. “I’ll be seeing you. Tell Matsuda-kun that the book was wonderful. Well. I’ll tell him that, too, next time I see him, haha.”

Kamukura only nods.

“See you.”

“See you!”

He leaves on that rather discordant note.

--

When he returns to his room, there is not much else to do besides sit there on the bed and mull.

Komaeda Nagito...really is...

His eyes fall shut as the thought itself trails off into nothing. Nothing but quiet. Time passes, and there’s a knock on the door.

It’s well past midnight. Without even waiting for an answer, Matsuda Yasuke pushes his way in, yawning inelegantly.

“Yoo... Letting you know I didn’t somehow die.”

“I would have been aware either way,” was the blank response. Under the dull light, Matsuda rubs his eyes blearily. Another yawn, and Matsuda nods a few times.

“Right, right... Of course... Jackass.” Matsuda grumbles, and he straightens up. “How was Komaeda?”

“He liked his gift. He had a satisfactory day.” It’s dully spoken, but the words are strangely weighted. “I suppose—even one who exists miserably can find happiness in living.”

“Yeah? That’s—wild to hear you say. Mm... Wonder if I’m dreaming... Maybe I really did die.”

In the blink of an eye, Kamukura stood up and steadied him, keeping him from swaying until he toppled over.

“You should rest as well. I suspect—Komaeda Nagito will be happier to see you in higher spirits, Matsuda Yasuke.”

“Dooon’t tell me what to do,” Matsuda slurred. “But fiiiiine. See if I ever check on you out of worry again. At least you were nice to the kid on his birthday. I gueeeeeess.”

He thinks about Komaeda Nagito and that worthless smile. But he also thinks about Komaeda Nagito and his innocent gaze.

“I suppose,” he echoed. “I suppose...”

Matsuda had already dozed off. Funny, that. Kamukura wondered if Komaeda Nagito was resting as well—if he was sleeping peacefully. If he was lonely.

I want to see him.

What a strange, unsettling thought that was.

That this person exists is—

Kamukura pauses, and shakes his head, helping Matsuda to bed.

I suppose it isn’t boring.

#KamuKoma #izuru kamukura #nagito komaeda #yasuke matsuda #kamukura izuru #Magi fics #MatsuKamu #but not really #MatsuKamuKoma #but also not really #KamuKomaWeek #Yaaaaaaay #another week doooooone #whoooooo #I did it