#I am... not really expecting anything lol

[deanstead]

With Spencer

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Reader

Requested: no

Summary: Y/N deals with the wave of anxiety that hits her after Spencer's conference

Word Count: 900+

Tags/Warnings: established relationship, anxiety, insecurities

A/N: Had to get this out of my head so I wrote this on a whim, then it sat in my drafts because I was worried it sucked (still am) but @halsteadlover once again threatened to kick my ass (because that's how we communicate love) so I'm posting this. Please do not shoot me if it sucks lol.

SPENCER REID MASTERLIST

You stood off to the side of the spacious conference hall, quietly watching as people approached him after his spotlight presentation.

You’d have been able to spot him anywhere he was standing even if the place was twice as crowded as it was now.

There seemed to be something that had drawn you to him almost automatically since the first time you met, and he seemed to emit a glow that only you could see.

Spencer raised his head slightly, his eyes locking onto yours effortlessly, and he smiled softly at you before his attention was drawn back to the person next to him.

You couldn’t help the small smile that flit across your face, accompanied by the familiar flutter in your gut that only Spencer managed to make you feel.

At the same time, a darker swirl of insecurity seemed to rise up to meet the innocent butterfly flitting around in your stomach.

It wasn’t new. This feeling of being inadequate next to Spencer, the feeling that he was made for greater things and that maybe somehow you were holding him back. It was totally irrational but the thought still greeted you once in a while. Sometimes it reared its head when he made a joke that you didn’t totally get or when he started rambling and you lost him halfway. But even if that wasn’t it, personally watching him stand up in front of an entire conference hall and deliver facts and research you didn’t fully grasp would definitely do it.

You didn’t know how long you stood there, lost in your thoughts while trying to keep the dark swirl of anxiety as controlled as possible.

“Sorry, I didn’t expect to take so long.”

His voice pulled you out of your thoughts and you smiled back at him, although the look in his eyes told you that he knew something was up.

Spencer didn’t ask, merely smiling as he let you lead the way out of the hall and to the car.

It was about halfway through the car ride back that you realized you’d been a little too quiet. But that realization was too late.

“You okay?” Spencer asked quietly.

You looked up into his hazel eyes and tried a smile.

Spencer didn’t say anything, his eyes flicking back to the road before he made a deviation in his route and you raised your eyebrows.

“Caffeine replenish.” He said quietly, as if he could read your mind.

You watched Spencer as he stood at the counter, letting the intrusive thought of ‘maybe coming with him wasn’t such a great idea’ creep into your head.

When Spencer had asked if you wanted to come, all you’d thought about had been how happy you were that he wanted you there, and about how you’d take any extra time you could spend with Spencer before work whisked him away again.

You wondered if you would still have come if you’d known how you would be feeling now. Yet, something told you that you would have. Nothing would have deterred you from time with Spencer.

That thought was merely reinforced when Spencer slid into the seat opposite you, armed with your favorite coffee order.

After a short silence, Spencer broke it. "You okay?"

You nodded, then you shrugged realizing how futile it was to try to hide your emotions from your profiler boyfriend who was sitting opposite you.

You looked back down at your coffee, and sighed.

“You were amazing today, Spence. Really amazing.”

Spencer smiled back at you, the shy smile that seemed to be reserved just for you and you felt your heart flutter once again.

“You are amazing. And I just… well, I’m not.”

Spencer blinked back at you.

“Actually, recent studies have shown that couples are indeed more likely to be similar than different, but it also shows that other than similarities, complementary skills and features are just as important…” He paused mid-sentence. “I’m rambling again, right?”

You couldn’t help but crack a smile.

“What I’m saying is, you are amazing.” Spencer concluded.

Now, it was your turn to blink back at him.

“You have no idea. I can explain a lot of things, Y/N. But I can’t explain this. I can’t explain why we fit together like the last two pieces of a puzzle that didn’t seem likely but are actually the only two pieces that are supposed to be together. We just are.”

You ran your finger across the rim of your mug and Spencer reached out for your hand, taking it and playing gently with your fingers, almost like a habit.

“We are meant to be, crazy as that sounds coming from me.” Spencer laughed as he said it.

You let out a small chuckle.

“So don’t…” Spencer said, his voice dropping lower just slightly as his voice trailed off.

You glanced up now, unable to miss the crack of slight insecurity in his voice and you realized he was just as scared as you were.

Spencer smiled. "See? Similarity."

Sliding your hand out of his grasp momentarily, you made your way to sit by him in the small corner booth, sitting as close as you could before you slipped your hand back into his.

“I could never.” You whispered, in response to the sentence Spencer hadn't been able to bring himself to finish.

Spencer didn’t answer, just leaned toward you, taking your face gently in his hands as he pressed his lips against yours, almost like he was sealing a deal. You smiled against his touch, pulling closer to him, before you nuzzled your face into the crook of his neck.

The dark swirl was still there in the pit of your stomach, although it was slightly muted, but somehow but it didn’t matter because Spencer was here as well.

And as long as you had Spencer, the dark swirl had nothing on you.

THANK YOU FOR READING!! PLEASE TELL ME WHAT YOU THOUGHT OF THIS!!

If you want to support me, buy me a coffee!

#resa.fics #spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer x reader #reid x reader #criminal minds #spencer reid fic #criminal minds fic #spencer reid imagine #criminal minds imagine #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid x you #spencer reid x y/n

[five-and-dimes]

Dimes/Cheshyr Dreamling Week Masterpost

Oh hi. Didn't see ya there. In honor of Dreamling Week 2024 I am finally compiling my Dreamling fics (which is... all my Sandman fics lol) into a nice convenient masterpost.

Enjoy my excessive hurt/comfort shenanigans:

Your Eyes Slay Me Suddenly (King/Knight AU, 5.8k words) Hob is a knight for King Morpheus, and while they're clearly into each other, Morpheus has some secrets getting in the way.

Run Away (But We're Running in Circles) (Canon Divergence, 10.8k words) Dream isn't really loved- there are just people in his life who love everyone. Hob and co. work hard to prove him wrong.

Off Book (Human AU, Explicit, 890 words) Dream knows that every interaction has a script, even if the words he's supposed to say aren't really what he wants.

As You Always Were (Human AU, 2k words) Hob is finally coming out to his boyfriend. It goes... different than he expected.

Unsung Lullabies (Canon Divergence, 30.7k words) Hob is tasked with watching Dream after he is turned into a small child. In the process, he learns a lot about the things that shaped his lover into who he is as an adult.

A White Blank Page (Canon Divergence, 4.3k words) Hob lashes out at Dream, but it's hard to apologize when Dream thinks he's done nothing wrong.

Mountain Sounds (Vampire/Werewolf AU, 6.3k words) There are many who think it's wrong for a vampire and a werewolf to be together, and so they try to tear them apart. They go about it the wrong way.

Next to Nothing (Retired Dream, 6k words) Dream thinks his difficulties as a new human are a personal failing. Determined not to burden Hob with his struggles, he ends up hiding things he shouldn't.

Undisclosed Desires (Canon Divergence, Explicit, 4.7k words) Hob learns that Dream has never experienced receiving oral sex. He decides to fix that problem immediately.

100 Years of Drowning (So What's a Few More?) (Canon Divergence, 4.8k words) Dream doesn't think it's necessary for Hob to know the details of his imprisonment, even if it makes some things harder. That's all fine and well until Hob wants to shower together.

Sloom (Canon Divergence, 5.2k words) Hob wants to meet Dream's family, and Dream fears the consequences of Hob learning that the other Endless are so much better than him.

Smile Like You Mean It (Canon Divergence, 4.6k words) Hob is determined to hear Dream laugh, and Dream is determined to hide it.

Endless. Not Everything. (Canon Divergence, 5.3k words) Dream is under the impression that Hob is not attracted to his masculine form, and decides to do something about it, even to his own detriment.

Come Morning Light (Canon Divergence, 6.3k words) In which Dream has nightmares about Hob speaking to him with someone else's voice.

Now I Lay Me (Canon Divergence, 10.5k words) Dream is tired of being a person, and so choses to dissolve into the Dreaming in order to preserve his function while still being gone. Those close to him have a lot to say about that decision.

Body and Soul (Canon Divergence, 3k words) Dream is willing to give Hob anything he wants, but his body is sometimes louder than he is.

Safe in the Palm of Your Hands (Canon Divergence, 2.1k words) During a panic attack, Dream shapeshifts and flees somewhere he feels safe. Coincidentally, there is a mouse in Hob's apartment.

#the sandman #dreamling #my writing #dreamling week #dreamling week 2024

[pookietv]

online embarrassment | arthurtv

this was a req!! and i think its adorable

there will be a part two to this !!!

being a simple university student, you had simple pleasures - getting drunk on the weekend, binge watching tv shows, and a more strange one, online chess. you liked watching people play, you liked playing yourself, you loved the strategy aspect. on some websites you played on, there was the option of livestreaming your chess game - no faces or voices, but people could chat alongside you playing, and you enjoyed seeing input on your games.

one day you were playing a particularly tricky game, being forked from practically the get go, and being the victim of many pawn trades, you were definitely on a losing streak, even if you were just playing against a bot. it was being streamed, but there were only four people watching, not that embarrassing right? especially because it was hidden behind a chess username and no one knew who you were anyways, so it didn't really matter.

so when a comment came in,

ATV: i wouldn't have played rook to f4 there, leaves an opening for a three move check :)

your head tilted a little, turning back to the game and furrowing your eyebrows, trying to figure what they had meant - and they were right, the move was a little careless and it could lead to checkmate.

you nodded to yourself, trying to amend the damage by playing your bishop defensively, to which another comment came in.

ATV: sorry for backseat gaming here, but you could have check in two

you smiled a little more at the comment, placing one hand on your chin and the other on your mouse, following some moves for what must have been fourty-five seconds before you clicked, they were right again. you made the move, the bot making its response, defending also, before in a few short moves, the game was over, you had won by check.

youruser: @/ATV thank you! i still kinda suck after playing for so long lmao

ATV: @/youruser do you want a game? :)

youruser: @/ATV sure! i'll add you now :P

so you added them, and they requested a game. in the chatbox on the side, you saw another message just as they had moved their first piece.

ATV: so what's your name?

youruser: i'm y/n, what about you?

ATV: arthur :)

he moved with an unusual polish opening, so you played traditional and tried to take control of the centre. within a few minutes, he had one of your pawns pinned, and had taken another.

youruser: damn you're actually really good

youruser: feeling a little defeated here :)

ATV: i'm just a loser with far too much time on my hands

youruser: well i mean me too but still, you're smoking me

ATV: cause you're playing too much attack not enough defence

youruser: i feel i may need you to tutor me lmao

ATV: lets finish up this game rq and then i'll help lol

unsurprisingly, he won, but you actually came closer than expecting, and it was a pretty even match after the poor beginning.

ATV: you're actually pretty good, you were just being modest

youruser: hm well maybe

youruser: suppose i'll have to keep challenging you til i win >:D

ATV: do you have discord or anything? easier to explain and talk on there rather than chess in game chat lol

youruser: i do! i'll link it rq :)

youruser: it's yourdiscuser #1782

and from there, you began talking semi-regularly, you played chess often and spoke tactics and games, he helped teach you and you enjoyed the company.

youruser: isn't it really strange we know nothing about each other other then chess defence strategies

youruser: i mean what if you're the insane chess killer man

ATV: yes, thats exactly who i am, the Insane Chess Killer Man, can't believe you caught me red handed

ATV: i mean what do you wanna know

youruser: i mean, idk,,, where are you from? i mean i know you speak english but you could be from anywhere i guess :O

ATV: i live in england, what about you :)

youruser: me too! i'm in london atm for uni, getting my masters

ATV: i am also in london! so if you're getting your masters, you're like ... somewhere around 24?

youruser: yeah, i'm 23 :P

youruser: what about you? i mean i have a feeling you're not some sixty year old man based on the fact you use discord but idk

ATV: i'm 28,,, getting very old :(

youruser: wow, very old indeed, must be such a shame

youruser: its gonna suck when i'm gonna have to visit you in a nursing home to play chess with you in two years time

ATV: okay i'm not that old you divvy :)

youruser: kidding, kidding ! anyway, i have to go because i have class but,, if you maybe wanna add me on instagram, its @/youruser :)

getting back from your lectures and practically throwing your backpack on the floor and collapsing on your bed, you planned on rotting the rest of the day away in pajamas and consuming far too much social media.

you opened instagram to a new follower: @/arthurtv

you assumed it was arthur from chess, and obviously in curiosity you opened his page straight away, you were nosy and you wanted to know who he was.

the first thing that shocked you was what he looked like: you didn't know what you were expecting but you didn't think it was going to be him.

he was... attractive, you had to admit, and your eyes had widened once you had seen him.

the second thing that shocked you was his followers, and his bio - he was a youtuber?

classically, you had to be nosy and follow the links to his youtube, your eyebrows raised a little as you looked at his channel, giggling to yourself, he did commentary on reality tv? you hadn't seen that before, but once you watched a video, you realised he was funny, too. he made it funny, despite the fact that you had at first felt it was the strangest youtube topic ever.

youruser: why hello arthurtv

youruser: i was definitely not expecting you

arthurtv: why hello y/n

arthurtv: i could say the same about you

youruser: well i mean i don't have any surprises

youruser: but you are apparently known for commenting on 90 day fiance?

arthurtv: i'd argue you have some surprises

arthurtv: and yes, i make commentary videos! wasn't trying to hide it or anything, just was a weird thing to bring up in conversation :)

youruser: no, it seems cool! i wasn't judging :) i don't watch much youtube so i don't know too much about it

youruser: and anyways, what surprises do i have?

arthurtv: i wasn't expecting you to look like that i suppose

youruser: like what ??

arthurtv: i mean, i don't know, pretty i suppose

arthurtv: you're very pretty, i just didn't know what i was expecting to be honest

youruser: wow you thought i couldn't be pretty cause i'm a loser playing chess??? smh arthur

youruser: (i'm kidding, i didn't expect you to look like you either)

arthurtv: you know that's not what i meant!!

arthurtv: what did you expect me to look like then?

youruser: well since you're 28, i suppose i was expecting a zimmerframe or walking stick or something

arthurtv: ha ha very funny

#arthur frederick #arthur frederick x reader #arthurtv #arthurtv x reader #chaos crew

[wlwprker]

coffee + post it notes- s.r. x barista! reader

a/n: I am so bad with titles omg sorry! I literally had a dream about this so I'm turning it into a little blurb! I have never written for Spencer before so i hope this is okay haha :) this was longer than i expected omg lol

warnings: minimal proofreading, use of bold and italics, I apologize for grammar or spelling mistakes

wc: 1,126

Spencer was not having a great morning, he was not anticipating the rain to be as heavy as it was and just as luck would have it, his umbrella got stuck and was not helping to protect him from the downpour. Spencer sighed in annoyance as he bolted and nearly lost balance as he got on the train, the ride was not bad but there was one thing he needed more than anything:

coffee.

Spencer is not a coffee drinker at all, he drowns his coffee in lots of sugar that Derek teases him for which is ridiculous, he needs the sugar! He was early enough, he usually is one of the first people to enter the building, but he didn't want to wait for coffee, he needed the caffeine as soon as possible. Spencer stops in his tracks when he sees a quiet coffee shop that is very close to work, and he has no idea how he has never seen it before. Spencer pushes open the door to The Thinking Cup Cafe and the smell of coffee and pastries hits him all at once but there's a third smell that hits him that most people don't pick up on, but Spencer picks up on it immediately.

The smell of books.

Spencer sighed happily, his bad morning long forgotten as he took in the shelves of books that lined the walls and the quiet bustle of the morning rush of people getting their caffeine to start their day. Spencer walked up to the counter to place an order, but he almost tripped over himself when he made eye contact with you. You were really pretty, it made him extremely nervous.

"Hi! What can I get for you today?", you ask with a smile on your face and that smile warmed him instantly and he hasn't even had a sip of coffee yet.

"Oh- I'd just like a medium black coffee with lots of sugar, please", Spencer hated the way he nearly forgot how to speak because of you. You were just a barista at a coffee shop, and he could barely get a full sentence out without stuttering.

"What's your name?"

"Spencer"

You smiled softly as you made his order, and your friend eyed you curiously as she watched you write out a little note on a post it note and folded it and tucked it behind the order receipt that you attached to the cup. Spencer thanked you for the coffee and headed to the office, he sat down at his desk and took a sip of his drink, but he caught sight of the post it and his eyebrows furrowed as he took the note and opened it and read:

I hope you have a good day :)

Spencer smiled and folded the note and tucked it away from prying eyes, he wanted to keep this a secret even if it meant nothing.

You looked forward to seeing Spencer even if he never came regularly which made you develop a tiny crush on him, you missed him when he didn't come in, you swore to never get hung up on a guy like this, but he felt...different.

Two weeks went by, and he had finally returned to your coffee shop and your coworkers took note of how you visibly glowed and they thought it was hilarious.

"You are a lost cause", your friend had whispered to you between handling customers, and you ignored her. Spencer scanned the shelves of the books, picked up two books and walked to the counter.

"Hi! welcome back! What can I get for you?", you felt like a little girl with a crush, but you couldn't help yourself, he just radiated kindness and he piqued your interest probably because you barely knew anything about him.

"My usual, and these two books, please", Spencer said shyly, and you found him incredibly adorable. You got his coffee for him and wrote out another note and stuck it one of the books, you decided to make it your thing with Spencer even if it never went anywhere, you enjoyed your little fantasy.

Spencer got back to his desk and opened one of the books and saw another note which made him feel warm inside, he liked that it was your own way of communicating with him, he felt special.

You are starting to become one of my favorite customers but don't tell anyone!

The smile on Spencer's face was huge and being a profiler surrounded by profilers, they were curious. JJ was the first one to make the step to approach Spencer because he rarely smiles like...that. She was intrigued.

"What is making you smile so much?" JJ asked and Spencer frantically packed his things away and stuttered out an excuse that was not believable at all.

"I'm betting it's a girl" Derek said as he watched Spencer at his desk for the fourth week in a row smiling brightly with a faint blush painting his cheeks. Emily nodded in agreement as she pondered what to do next. Penelope left her office to see what the huddled group was discussing, and her face lit up at the mere thought that Spencer had found someone.

"When can we meet her?"

Spencer nearly fell out of his chair as he busied himself with paperwork, but he knew he couldn't not answer her because she is persistent especially when it comes to her friends love life.

"It's nothing like that, I don't even know her name! She's just nice and very pretty", Spencer mumbled as he avoided Penelope's eyes. Spencer adored Penelope so he couldn't not spill the details to her.

Despite his best efforts, he walked into the coffee shop with Penelope, Emily, JJ, and Derek. He found himself looking at you while you were talking to a coworker, he just wanted to know you more than just the barista who gave him his coffee and slipped in notes.

"Spencer, hi!", you said as you smiled at him, and Spencer waved back with a goofy smile on his face. Spencer felt his face heat up at all the words of his friends praising you, he wanted to hide.

Spencer left his friends and walked up to you and you both fell into easy conversation as if you were friends for years and soon enough you both had to go back to your jobs, but you didn't want this connection with Spencer you had to end.

As if he read your mind, he scratched the back of his neck before speaking. "I don't want this to be over"

"It doesn't have to be, do you want my number?"

Spencer was grinning ear to ear as he pondered what the future held for the two of you.

#spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid fluff #wlwprker🥀💌 #criminal minds

[arcadekitten]

[MY WISHMAKER Spoilers!]

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I just played MY WISHMAKER last night and I loved it, so I wanted to give you my thoughts!

Arcade, you are SO SNEAKY AND CLEVER!!! I saw those promo images and was like "oh dear, he has a gunshot wound, what happened?" only to boot up the game and find out HIS WHOLE ARM WAS MISSING! You really can't tell when he's facing right, so I applaud you for hiding it so well.

I LOVE how sassy The Wishmaker is! I was expecting it/them(? I'll just go with them for now) to be kind of highfalutin and regal 'cause they're a deity and all but I really love how you went in this completely other direction! I think it does make sense since The Wishmaker obviously has to, like, grant people's wishes (in some way at least), so having a more casual manner of speech would probably make them less intimidated.

Also! I loved how you implemented the QTEs! I feel like it spices up the gameplay and is a nice little nod to your fans who played My Neighbor Enide. Even though I messed up all of them, though I SWEAR the Vas one was not my fault! I was mashing that Z button for dear life, but my laptop decided to type it into Edge for some reason!? I didn't even have it open!

Oh, and I see you were able to figure out the mouse movement? You said you'd have to move around using the arrow keys, which I was fine with, but I was pleasantly surprised when I booted up the game and I could move with the mouse too! It really completed the experience.

I don't really have much to say about the story, not because it's bad, but because it's so shrouded in mystery that my cogs are still turning as to what it could mean. I did really like the puzzles, though! And I did notice those key items you hid away...

I have plenty of theories I've been ruminating on even before MW, but I don't wanna put them here because 1) since this is an ask it might make you feel obligated to comment on them somehow which you are not and I don't want you to do, and 2) I think I would start rambling and make this ask a mile long LOL.

That's about everything I could think of off the top of my head! Overall, I really enjoyed it, and I hope you the best in all the other chapters and games you plan to make. I'm sure I'll enjoy them just as much, if not even more. Take care!

Haha yes! ♡ I know some people have been asking why Reginald has two arms in the promo images and it's like...it's meant to be a surprise, silly!

Also for our little Wishmaker character, yes! I adore them very much and I'm very excited for people to see more of them and learn their real name!! Another one of my favorites to be sure ♡ Not sure how I'll tag them in posts yet until their name reveal... clock, maybe? Just to avoid confusion? This character can be referred to with any pronouns, but for clarification that in games and in my posts they will only be referred to with "they" and the occasional "it"

I'm happy the QTEs are received well! (Granted they were a bit harder at first haha!) I'm happy to include them in future chapters as I feel future chapters will definitely be more linear and dialogue heavy and so I hope they can spice up the gameplay and keep things interesting and maybe just a tad more immersive! ♡

As for mouse movement controls it's kinda like a "Well yes, but actually no". You CAN move using the mouse if you really want to but you also have to be aware that you could accidentally hit an object's hitbox and activate its event. And you can't back out of an event once it has been activated like in typical point-and-clicks. (There's only so far I can push the engine with my experience level!) It's for this reason (and the surprise of QTE's!) that WASD/Arrow Key movement is recommended!

Thank you so much! ♡ I am so very happy to hear you enjoyed the experience and I love to hear what people have been brewing up regarding the story and the mysteries still unfolding (even though I can't say anything about it yet!) and I can't wait until I can have more to show you all! I'm really excited for it and I hope everyone will be too! ♡♡♡

#MY WISHMAKER #MY WISHMAKER Prologue #MY WISHMAKER spoilers #reply

[teainthesnow]

heyy guess who has a kofi that they never advertised lmao

but... still have not found a job and funds are running a bit low, so, uh, anything would be appreciated

I am also willing to do quick drawing requests/short drabbles (less than 1k) for anything £10 and over

#and if you're the person who gave me £10 the other day #that I haven't done anything for please feel free to request something #also no worries about not sending anything #I am... not really expecting anything lol

[silver-horse]

guys I felt genuine fear in my stomach while reading this tweet...

#this can't be happening... please ... #we really can't have anything good now... huh... everything will be tainted by greed... shit adaptations are incoming #horrid sequels etc... I am so sad that larian doesn't even own the fucking characters they made! fml #I haven't been interested in any of my hobbies in the past decade... bg3 helped me regain some of that joy #but this will be also screwed soon... it's already happening... how great #I understand why they are moving away from bg3... and I didn't expect any new content or dlc or anything like that #but I didn't expect that the characters will be handed over to WOTC ... that is horrible #my post #my posts #bg3 mine #larian studios #current events #giving me doomsday feelings ... but I already had doomsday feelings from the war getting worse nearby... #I guess if russia kills us all I won't have to feel sad about how all my favourite stories are ruined... oh well #apparently my mom is stocking up on food as if a bag of rice could save her if they drop an atomic lol #negativity posting #baldur's gate 3 #bg3 #wizards of the coast #twitter

[dangans-ur-ronpas]

brief break from the Grind to doodle some thp art with a way better title i thought up of just now ripp (not gonna change the title im too attached to the tag)

#thpff #byakuya togami #danganronpa #if its not clear his lens is reflecting makoto and kyoko overlaid on top of each other #i used a song lyric title bc i couldn't come up with anything good at the time and now. well. such is my life ig #but the song is good i do recommend. 'wolf' by aliceband #im trying to get back into drawing more i really am. expect more blond guy angst and other such variations in the future #his tie is fucked up. his shirt is wrinkled and the buttoned oddly. his hair is a little messy. nothing extremely noticeable #but goes to show that he is Crumbling. lol #i did not use the symmetry tool or flip tool on this. u may be able to tell. dont worry abt it lol

[densitywell]

oh, when Orym looked right at Imogen, days after his talk with Fearne abt what to do if she switches sides, and tells her, "I'm not worried about you." and Imogen didn't insight check him, or push into his mind; she just believed him. and I believed him as well, even though it could have easily been a lie, and then Liam confirmed that Orym really did trust her when he said that. he really did believe that Imogen would stand by the Hells, and she did. she looked her mother in the eye and she didn't waver. and it's not specifically because Orym trusted her, but his trust really does mean something to Imogen. she sought him out that night for a reason.

and now the solstice is still happening but things are so different, and Imogen is one of the most vocally opposed members of the Hells to Ludinus, and the Ruby Vanguard, and Predathos. they're bad. they need to be stopped. she'll kill her mother, kill herself, if that's what needs to be done. her questions and her doubts are gone- or at least, hidden away.

and if they are not, if she's suspicious in any way, Orym has personal orders from the wise and benevolent Tempest (and she is wise and benevolent, is the thing!!) to remove her from the situation however he sees fit. to "do the thing," in the parlance used in Orym's conversation with Fearne, a phrasing acknowledged as vague even at the time. Orym, who loves Imogen, and who shows her kindness and empathy, and who stared the fathoms of nuance and pain defining the actors in this conflict in the face and rejected it in favor of revenge just last week. Orym, who told Fearne she would have to "do the thing" because he couldn't - I always assumed it was because he knew he couldn't match up to Imogen on his own, but it could just as easily be that he couldn't bear to do to her what he thinks would need to be done. Imogen still doesn't know they had that talk. the leash has been held so loose that she didn't even know it was there.

#imogen temult #orym of the air ashari #critical role #cr3 #orym #cr #now i have explained before how i think people generally respond to being held under constant unshakeable suspicion (badly.) #but apparently acknowledging that imogen might feel and react negatively to this is coddling her and hating conflict in stories so. #for the record i don't really expect orym to do anything on this front - like if it came down to it he WOULD follow keyleths order. or try #but there would almost certainly be second and third and fourth and as many chances as he could possibly give before that were to occur #if only. at the very least. bc the resulting blowout would tear the entire fucking party apart lol. and i think imogen's conviction is real #ALSO this is not me being upset at this story beat or saying that orym and keyleth bad imogen good or anything. i am simply saying words. #bc i find what is happening compelling and emotionally resonant. u wld think this wld be obvious. and yet #crposting

[pieceofcec]

Ever wonder how many fics a ship has?

Well, wonder no more! For I have spent the last... 3-4 hours creating a chart to show how many fics a pairing has romantically and platonically!

Some things to keep in mind: fics can have multiple pairings, so the totals per character may not add up perfectly. This also means the averages aren't exact either, but they'll give you an idea of how rare a pairing is. The totals also give an idea of how popular a character is.

Only 2-character pairings are listed - I didn't want to figure out how to list every possible poly combination. I may add poly-units in the future though, but I won't include them in the averaging at all.

Also, fun fact An is the most annoying to search up because her name is within Kohane and Kanade's, so I had to use Shiraishi to search for her instead.

#ramblings #resources #project sekai #colorful stage #rui and tsukasa are such outliers I swear #touya and akito are too but not to that extent #yeah today I learned how to use functions and that I love sheets #but I am now so very tired because this took so much longer than I expected #but to be fair I had to search for 400 numbers and set up 42 formulas lol #really hope someone finds this helpful #that would make me very happy #but yeah I keep thinking a rare pair event would be super cool #and that made me wonder what a rare pair really was #since the number of fics varies depending on fandom size #I'd prolly consider it anything under the average #just for simplicity #actually wait I need to add an average of all the pairings not just character totals #will add that after I post this LOL

[sysig]

I hope you blink before I do (Patreon)

#Doodles #SCII #Helix #ZEX #DAX #Blood #Fuck you *reinjects romance into your song about love-lost* #It's the ''I want to be the one to lay you to rest'' of it all #Or if not that then at least to be the last one suffering #See him off - make sure he goes knowing that he's not alone #I'm Fine just Don't Look at me and I'll Be Fine #Schrödinger's Fine lol - I am simultaneously Fine and Not Fine until I am observed #I simply subsist largely off of angst and then whatever small scrap of comfort that can be coaxed from there hehe #I am very mean to them considering how much I want them to be happy lol #Honestly I think what would be meaner is seeing ZEX off and then somehow DAX survives alone #Night ends just as he's about to blink out and oops you're still stuck here sorry about that <3 #But I wouldn't do that to them would I? #:3c #I also think it's interesting that I started doodling this before I actually read ZEX's death - I finished it after but still! #Does he just give off gutted vibes? Canonically he's eviscerated so #And not just in the eye way - in this case it's enucleation #Did you come here for eye removal surgery puns? I don't see why you'd expect anything different *b'dm tss* #I've done way more research on eye removal than I ever expected to but now those two terms will be forever seared into my mind haha #Hhh ZEX's death was very affecting to me ;; I'll talk about it more with its accompanying doodle but really 💔 #I wanted an honourable death for him - and if not that then a death where he wasn't alone - and if not that then to rest #He got one of the three ;;

[theflyingfeeling]

fic talk in the tags 💝

#aaaaaaaa i have only 4 stores left to write for the advent calendar and then i'm done?! 😭 #i can't believe it guys i might actually be able to pull this off 👀 #i've literally just winged it day after day with minimal planning #and i haven't even had a breakdown once? gonna knock on wood here real quick lol #i've had so much fun writing all these little stories too 🥺 and i'm fairly satisfied with them as well! yes!! me!! my biggest critic!! #i'm not gonna be writing anything for a while after i get these last ones done though lol i've written SO MUCH during these past weeks #however i did write down a short piece of dialogue in finnish the other day 👀 #like. literally 11 words and idk if i'm ever gonna write more but those words just...came to me so i had to write them down somewhere #(it has been peer-reviewed as 'perfect' (thanks eetu <3) and you can totally slide in my DMs if you're curious) #and the college/uni au i've been playing with practically all autumn is something i definitely want to give a try #(so far i only have some random notes and moodboards 😅) #but whatever i'll end up writing i'll do it because i want to and that's what's important 🤍 #thank you so much everyone who has been reading these stories or any of my fics this year #i really am not expecting anyone to read my stories and i'm happy if even just one person does 🥺 #okay sappy talk over now back to writing byeeeeee #*stories

[daz4i]

how and why is there discourse about whether or not certain queer identities exist/if people should be allowed(???) to use them. why is "people know their own identity better than you ever could, and they're the only one who get a say on what they are" such a tough concept to grasp

i think if you find yourself offended by the label someone uses (especially if they're a stranger) or think it invalidates your own, it's a good idea to look inside yourself and question why that may be. more often than not, it's a result of insecurity or uncertainty of your own identity (or many other things, but i won't make a whole list here). whatever reason it is, until you resolve it, you shouldn't take it out on people for having an identity you don't understand

many have said it before but it's worth saying over and over. infighting only helps our oppressors. conservatives don't care if you're a cis gay or a xenogender aegosexual aplatonic lesbian, they hate all of us either way. trying to fit in by going for people who are easier targets for them isn't gonna help you, it'll just alienate you from your own community, and you're never gonna please them. the momentary rush you get from hearing you're not like "one of /those/ gay people" is not worth it and is gonna do more harm in the long run, i assure you

also, it is important to me to say this, but having some less than nice kneejerk reaction caused by confusion about an identity you don't understand doesn't mean you're a bad person or anything. as long as you aren't mean to that person, and you take a second to think smth along the lines of "wait a minute, this isn't any of my business" after having said reaction, you're good 👍 a lot of reflexive reactions we have to things are ingrained into us simply by. well. living in a society 🤡 and you're not terrible for having those thoughts. it's your actions that matter, and your second thought (the "wait, why did i just think that?") is more defining of your actual character and morals than your reflex. i know that having thoughts like this, even tho they're unwanted, can very easily make one spiral, so it's important to me that whoever needs to hear this knows this doesn't make you a bad person 🙏 you're good, keep taking actions to be good, accept other people even if you don't understand them, and you're on the right track :)

#i considered adding that last part in the tags but i figured it'll be too long for that 😭 #i noticed i'm posting a lot of rants lately. sorry. but i do wanna make sure no one's actually feeling bad over them #if i complain about something that you do or call it mean and such. that doesn't make you a bad person #you can always work to change and grow 👍 it's not easy but it starts with smaller steps than you'd expect #and now i just switched to a whole other topic from my original point. oops #i do firmly believe that any discourse about someone's identity is dumb as fuck #seeing it in poll blogs always makes me 😐😬 like how is it any business for any of us. why is this up for debate #if a person says they're queer then they are. they don't need to pass some test or go through initiation to be accepted #if they feel comfortable with a certain word that's awesome. why does it matter to *you* which word they use #'they're only using this microlabel to feel special' so? is there anything wrong with that? #'this label contradicts [insert other identity that falls under the same umbrella]' ok. but does that hurt anyone in any way #a lot of identities can even be self contradictory. does it matter tho? does it affect anyone in any way? #'they might realize that label is wrong later' again. what's the harm in that. #i don't blame anyone for these thoughts bc like. this is how cishets view a lot of the even more common labels #so you're basically taught to think this way from day one. that doesn't mean you need to stick to that thought process #you might have these reflexes forever no matter how hard you try. but you'll get quicker about moving on from them #but you do have to try. you do have to realize that other people's identities aren't about you #anyway. this post feels like batting at a hornets nest. really hope i don't get some bad faith readers here lol #(i noticed a lot of places one could apply bad faith but like it's 3:30 am i'm too tired to add this many disclaimer. #so i'm gonna trust you to not jump to conclusions and to approach this in good faith okay? mwah 🖤) #also my whole ramble abt morality (in the tags too) is relevant to. any topic really #i may just make a separate post about it really. .....tomorrow tho.

[bookishfeylin]

Taking a break from here so I can TRY to finish this ACOHAS chapter so… I won’t be posting a lot for the next week or so

#‘Bookish why do you write 20-30 page chapters’ #Because I MUST #anyway I’m not leaving or anything just wanted to give y’all a heads up to not expect a lot of posting #Again I am NOT ghosting y’all or anything. I just really have to update this lol #And the countdown nears so #:) #bookish rambles

[skunkes]

#talkys #realizing now that ive never really been able to see a future where i drive ykwim #not in the sense of Lol I Dont Wanna Do It So I Wont but in the sense that its never been something ive been #excited or hopeful about/for #same with moving out. same with having a job. same with transitioning #i cant See that in my future it doesnt even seem far away it just seems like. unthinkable #i think i might still be stuck in the 'didnt expect to live this long' mode bc its true i feel like i should be dead i feel i should die #tomorrow. ykwim. which makes it all so much harder. 0 motivation bc its unrealistic to me #to imagine any sort of future #because i dont really have a future ! #why learn to drive if i dont have a future #no way to find a job that doesnt suck bc i dont have qualifications for anything Good (my fault) so #putting it off for as long as possible. bc i really dont have a future. i dont ! #i am inept and cant handle being alive #and thats that ive had no real issues or tribulations.

[mcl-mia]

god, i want a secret life where you and i can get bored out of our minds

(//zeus week day 4 - affection)

#not mcl #wizardess heart #mia draws #zeusro #WERE YOU ALL EXPECTING ANYTHING ELSE????? ABSOLUTELY NOT. I AM THE AMBASSADOR OF ZEUSRO. #had to nerf this to post to tumblr LOL #zeus week 2023 #this one was my favorite to draw for obvious reasons and auauauauu def my favorite to thumbnail #even if it isn't the cleanest buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut oh well #kind of crunching on these mostly b/c i really wanted more time to do these but i did noootttttt have the time to #just little things. little affections. no i will not be elaborating on whether or not hiro is buttoning or unbuttoning zeus' shirt #i wanted to post this immediately so badddddddd but nope. waiting :) #zeus brundle #hiro tachibana