#Hey uh fuck you

[zivazivc]

. . . 😳

#hey uh floyd what the fuck are you saying?? #trolls #dreamworks trolls #i feel no shame for making this #just like JD feels no shame airing out his pits like that #trolls 3 #trolls band together #trolls branch #trolls john dory #trolls floyd #they're roommates now and they live in a sitcom #my art #trolls comic #i came up with this while walking the dog today #i kept repeating it in my head all the way home just so i wouldn't forget it #so much for enjoying a walk in the snow ajdbscbsdjhc

[kaeyacollection]

Who's ready for my Master Gaslight Gatekeep Girlboss Crepus Theory!!

I originally posted this over at Hoyolab and people there seemed to really like my favorite joke theory that Crepus just tries to gaslight the whole of Mondstadt right after obtaining Kaeya

Majority of this will be the same but with little tweaks for the wonderful tumblr audience

This joke stems from Kaeya's introduction:

and the use of the word "rumored"

Cause it's not like it said beyond Teyvat or the seven nations just Mondstadt

And I mean like c'mon how many families are living off the grid in Mondstadt

(Actually... Don't answer that I forgot Glory's boyfriend is just

Out there in the bush with Razor...)

Initially I had the idea of Crepus walking around the markets one day carrying Kaeya with Diluc beside him running into Varka who asks:

"Who's the boy?"

"You mean my son?"

"Not Diluc the boy you're carrying"

"I have two sons? You know this??"

But then the Caribert quest came out mentioning Kaeya ran away from home near immediately and was dragged home by Crepus just as fast and it became even funnier

Cause imagine you're by the docks one day and richest man in town gets off the boat with no cargo but instead a tiny child you may not have seen before that Crepus seems to be very cross with at the moment and threatening to turn him into a leash kid if he runs off again

In a small town that loves gossip do you know how fast that information is spreading? Cause I do and Varka's knocking on Crepus's door 30 minutes later like:

"Is this what we're doing? We're just taking kids now?"

Both paths lead to Varka asking where Kaeya comes from and getting hit with a

"I think you're a bit too old to still be confused about the birds and the bees Varka"

Varka getting frustrated to the point he just starts demanding Kaeya tell him what's up

Love to see him following in his fathers footsteps of stressing Varka the fuck out

And upon hearing how his birth father left for juice and didn't return Varka went

"Good! That was ALL I needed to know!!"

Follow ups on if his father intended to abandon him or got lost in the storm and needed a search party?

Don't care!! You weren't kidnapped!!

Welcome to the knights! 🤝

Which bringing it back to it only being a rumor

In a town of alcoholics, who's gonna call out the one guy with the winery?

Here's some add ons that got sparked from the comment section 😘

Bonus panels would have included Varka showing up with Rosaria one day mimicking Crepus about "wHaT you ForGot I haD a Kid" sparking a trend within the community of just adopting random children to the point posters are made saying "In Barbatos name: See a child Take a child"

Alice seeing it and pulling a "when in rome" tucking both Albedo and Diluc(who is yelling he is an adult) under her arms and telling Klee if she ever sees someone in need of a mom let her know she'll send over the paperwork right away

And then the last bonus: Venti wakes up, walks in through the gate while playing a tune, and stops when he sees the poster, not sure if he needs to start yet another revolution, or if this one is fine actually

I imagine the posters had to be taken down because visitors were losing their kids left and right and the solution of parents pinning a note saying "not dead & still want custody" to their kids shirt didn't catch on but the saying still lives strong in the hearts of Mondstadt's citizens I mean look Bennett and his 27 dads Mondstadt may have a lot of orphans but the demand is even higher

Comment on original post:

"I have a headcanon where Kaeya fooled first Crepus, then the rest of Mondstadt but.this is too funny!! I want to see this happening!"

Which prompted one of my new favorite lines at the end:

"Wait by fool Crepus first do you mean like Crepus finding him out in the storm bringing him inside to ask him where he lives and Kaeya's just

"? I live here? You adopted me? Are you feeling okay?"

Cause I'm absolutely cry laughing over this that's so good but that also means when Kaeya runs away Crepus is just

"hey no no l'm not misplacing you a second time come home" "

#Kaeya may have wandered away from his last family (believes Crepus) but that sure as fuck wasn't gonna happen a second time #Kaeya #kaeya alberich #crepus ragnvindr #Crepus #dawn family #genshin impact #Genshin #thats right now I get to be the one with the many tags trying to get this out there lmao #dont worry I wont do this often here this blog is primarily a trap to get you guys to check out a very talented lore blog #uh I mean... #to show you various fan works of Kaeya? #hey what's that pinned post up there? #god I hope this is formatted right I havent made a tumblr post since we had post headers #and god damn did it keep fighting me #also it's like 5 a.m. if you see any mistakes... #that's tomorrow's problem

[luckycl0ve]

I left the door open to the dark

I said come in, come in, whatever you are

[ everyone | mitski ]

#gale dekarios #gale of waterdeep #bg3 gale #bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #hey did you know that sometimes i think i am free until i find i'm back in line again #it's never been more over for me btw i'm obsessed luv xxxx #he uh. he got pretty fucked up!! and had to stay in a tower about it for years. we all relate

[luck-of-the-drawings]

!!! FLASHING LIGHTS WARNING!!! [IM NOT FUCKIN AROUND!!]

REACHED THE CUSP OF 'THIS MAY NEVER BE ABSOLUTELY FINISHED N IF I DONT SHOW IT NOW, IT WILL NEVER SEE THE LIGHT OF DAY.' SO HERE, A PROJECT IVE BEEN ORBITING AROUND UHH SINCE 2021 OR SO.

#jrwi fanart #jrwi show #jrwi riptide #gillion tidestrider #cw flashing lights #LOOORRD OF LIGHTNING SAAAAVE ME!!!! #RAAAHHHH I LOVETHIS SONG SO FUCKIN MUCH AND I LOVE GILLION SO FUCKIN MUCH RAAHHHH!! RAAHHHH!!! #BUT YES YES I HAD LIKE A WHOLE OTHER HALF TO THIS SKETCHED OUT BUT IT WONT FINISH COOKIN FOR A MILLION YEAARS!!!! #MAYBE SOMEDAY..... #ANYWAY. this is my first time actually syncing audio to my animations. normally i domnt know howww. #i animated it all in fire alpaca AND THEN i mixed everything in a pirated movie maker. it kinda uh. sucks. but its WHAT I GOT BAYBE!! #i relaly like how i animate swishy hair... i was inspird by eris from sinbad. i can only HOPE i got on that level w the watery flowyness #LIUGHTNING IS HARD TO ANIMATE TOO. I WATCHED ALOTTA VIDEOS ABSORBED MINIMAL TUTORIALS AND UHH I THINK I DID OKAY!! #better than bad!!! but i can still do better. eventually. ugh. FLASHING LIGHTS TOO HUH? U LIKE ANIMATINGB FLASHING LIGHT? #U LIKE MAKING THE BLACK N WHITE FLICKER RLY FAST UNTIL UR EYES BLEED OUT UR SKULL?? YEAAAHH YOU DO!!! #im also vry proud o the title cards i made at the beginning teheheheh. dependign on where riptide goes i MIGHT change it #BUT HEY THEORY TIME? I HOPE ONE OF THE GODDESSES COMES DOWN TO PILOT GILLIONS BODY SO THEY CAN BEAT THE FUCK OUT O THE OTHER GODDESS #WHO IS ALSO IN SOMEONE ELSES MORTAL BODY. GODS COMING DOWN TO WREAK HAVOC OVER PETTY DISAGREEMENTS OOOGH HOW FUN!! #GOOD ON YOU CHAMPION!! YOUR VESSEL HAS BEEN TRAINED TO BE STRONG AND HARDY. PERFECT FOR CHANNELING DIVINE ENERGY. #OHHHH WHAT A PERFECT WEAPON YOU ARE. NOW GO AND IMMANENTIZE A WATERY ESCHATON #PARAGON OF OCEANS WRATH I WANT TO SEE YOU DROWN THE LAND. DESTROY!!! EAT!!! BURN!!! RAAAGHH I NEED GILLION TO GET MORE POWER!!!! #ALSO in other news i uh. actually posted this onto twitter forever ago but forgot to post it here bc i can only post it from pc and BABY!! #IM NOT ON THE COMPUTER OFTEN! NOT ANYMORE!! NOT ANYMOREE!!! IM FREE BAYBE!! i used to be so miserable. sometimes i think abt that. #ANYWAY. pls enjoy. just this much took so long. i love makin the lil guys move.... ouh.... hava good day if u get the chance to.

[fuumiku]

Happy new year!!

Some doodles I did today to unwind + test a lineart brush

#Dungeon meshi #mithrun #chikchuck tims #Laios please I swear you’re my fave I’ll draw you next Laios I promise Laios no don’t leave- #The mithrun one is so low resolution… Well it was supposed to be a quick doodle after all #Maybe i should post these sort of sketches I do more often #Coloring Chilchuck felt like therapy legit. Thank you dad #The mithrun one is a little fucked up but idk. It’s so aesthetic to me. Enjoy the many vers lol #Idk how long i’ll keep the new icon though #Hey my art style are you Chilchuck’s wife? Because I can’t help but feel like you left me for no reason #Jkjk my art style crisis usually stops whenever I just draw for the sake of it with no goal in mind lmao. Which is why I should do it more #Often!! I am so stubborn & stupid. Doing that shall be my New Year resolution ig #Y’all still here? Uhhh uh happy holidays good day!!

[sluckythewizard]

[PUT INTO PLACE, TIED DOWN AND ARRANGED, AND IS NEVER THE SAME, AGAIN.]<-listen to my favorite songs. VAMPIRES ARE WONDERFUL ARENT THEY. THE FLESH IS SO MUCH MORE DURABLE. SO MUCH STRETCHIER THAN HUMANS. THE STRESS DOESNT KILL A VAMPIRE THE SAME WAY IT DOES A HUMAN. YOU CAN TAKE THEM APART THREAD BY THREAD AND LEAVE THEM WIDE AWAKE WITHOUT WORRY OF THE BRAINMATTER SPOILING UNDER VINEGARY AGONY.

#cw gore #WEEEE WHIPPING OUT ALL MY BELOVED PIXEL HORROR GAME SOUNDTRACKS FOR THIS ONE #STILL A WIP #SORTA. FORKSFORKSFORKS INSPIRED ME TO START WORKIN AT IT AGAIN. AND NOW IT LIVES. IT LIIIVEESS!!! #MOSLT.Y ATLEAST. I MIGHT MESS W IT MORE LATER. WE SHALL SEE. ANYWAY GABRIEL MONTEZ HUH. WOW POOR GUY #THERES A FASCINATING FEELING THAT COMES WITH BEING ON A OPERATING TABLE.AND BEING IN IMMENSE PAIN #ONE OF MY FONDEST MEMORIES IS LAYING ON A DENTIST CHAIR. SHAKING AND INVOLUNTARILY CRYING AFTER MANY MANY #NEEDLES TO MY THE MOUTH. I METABOLIZE THE NUMBING STUFF QUICKLY APPARENTLY. THEY NEEDED ALOT OF NUMBING SHOTS #BUT I WASNT AFRAID OR DISTRESSED. THE DENTIST WAS VERYVERY NICE AND ALSO UH. PRETTY. BUT THATS BESIDE THE POINT #THE POINT IS. THAT IT WAS FASCINATING TO REALIZE MY PHYSICAL RESPONSE TO PAIN UNDER A CONTROLLED ENVIRONMENT #I DIDNT KNOW HOW EASY IT WAS TO SHAKE AND TO CRY PRYVIOUS TO THAT EXPERIENCE.MY DENTAL ADVENTURES CONTINUE #THEY CONTINUE TO HELP ME UNDERSTAND WHAT ITS LIKE FOR PAIN TO BOIL AWAY THE TIME. TO DISTORT THE PASSING HOURS AND CONSUME EVERY THOUGHT #DO YOU REMEMBER PAIN? THE MOST SEVERE PAIN IN YOUR LIFE? NOW WILL YOU IMAGINE RED LIGHTS? RED LIGHTS AND SHIFTING FIGURES #NOW WILL YOU IMAGINE PAIN UNRELENTING.PAIN WORLD SHATTERING.PAIN IMMORTAL.CAN YOU IMAGINE BEING PULLED APART #THE HUMAN MIND CAN ONLY WITHSTAND SO MUCH PAIN BEFORE IT SHUTS DOWN AND HIDES.IT NEEDS TO PROTECT ITSELF AFTERALL. PAIN CAN ALTER #PAIN SHIFTS THE CHEMISTY OF THE MIND OF THE FLESH OF THE SOUL. FOR HUMANS ATLEAST. BUT YOU ARE NO LONGER HUMAN #YOU CHOSE OTHERWISE DIDNT YOU BOY.BECAUSE YOU WANTED MORE.STATUS.POWER.APPROVAL.SECURITY.SAFET.Y. #OHHH YOU CAN WITHSTAND THE PAIN FOR THAT. FOR ALL THAT. YOU WERENT TOLD THERE WOULD BE PAIN BUT YOU KNOW WHAT YOU WERE PROMISED. #ITS ALL WORTH IT IN THE END. NOW LETS JUST HOPE SOME BLONDE TWERP DOESNT PROVE TO BE STRONGER THAN THE STRONGEST PEOPLE IN YOUR LIFE #LETS HOPE NO ONE FUCKS THIS UP. LETS HOPE NO ONE FUCKS THIS UP. I LOST MY TRAIN O THOUGHT #anyway dawww poorr gabeee that shit probably huuurrrrtttss but so much time has passed that your body got tired of screaming and squirming #why havnt you passed out yet? maybe you might as well have at this point. like sleeping with your eyes open and your nerves awake #OH HEY FUNFACT ABT THE ART. I FOUGHT W IT ALOT. TOOK A LONG WHILE FOR ME TO BE REMOTELY HAPPY W THIS. #i was thinking abt pixel horror video games when i made it.just as i do with all great things ofc ofc #i love you pixel horror game i love yooouuuuu.i struggled so much w the colors for so LONNGG UHGHGHGH but im finally happy...im finally fre

[diathadevil]

Gets this out of my head like the sleep deprived maniac that I am.

Make of these headcanons what you will.

#princess tutu #ruetho #fakiru #fan art #doodle #post canon au #do not question my fandom headcanon opinions i will stand on this hill with pegging Rue and service bottom Mytho #in my head Rue rides him on occasion which ended up with them getting a kid #anyway it's uh.... past 10 AM.... I woke up at 5 pm yesterday woops #dia: hey i should sleep maybe; my brain: ok but what if you draw your princess tutu ships in their married adult life enjoying themselves; #me in my delulu state: fuck you're so right brain you're so smart I could kiss you; my brain: we cannot for I am inside your head

[vergilthelibrarian]

His breathing is light and his face calm.

The man relaxed a little, seeing that his love was having a peaceful nap.

It wasn’t normal for him to sleep peacefully. He’d try his best not to sleep at all, but he is mortal after all, and he needed his sleep no matter how much he fought it.

Being plagued with nightmares of his past. A past he beats himself up for. A past he wishes that didn’t exist. But that’s not how time work and he knew this. He knew he couldn’t prevent the things that had happened to him, he was a child after all… but there was this side of him that believed that none of the horrors he faced wouldn’t’ve happened if he simply just been strong.

And so, as child no more, he suffers as an adult. Struggles with his emotions, with healing the wounds of his past.

And his love saw this.

It may not have been written on his face, but it was surely obvious within his eyes.

The pain that it held as he kept his face cold and intimidating.

It was obvious that he kept his walls up.

But seeing the peacefulness on his face as he slept made his love’s heart swell with hope.

Slowly, his walls were coming down.

#hey uh have whatever this is #I’ve honestly been writing absentmindedly as of late #why do people ship any of the Sparda boys together that shit is weird as fuck and you need to be ****** #vergil x reader #vergil x male reader #devil may cry x reader #devil may cry x male reader #vergil sparda x reader

[autisticaradiamegido]

day 299

cha boy is starting on a cpap machine for the first time tonight

it turns out, that when i sleep, my cringe-ass larynx blocks itself up, and i STRAIGHT UP STOP BREATHING for up to 20 seconds at a time! of course i have always managed to start back up again, but as u might imagine this doesn't lead to great sleep quality

so wish me luck on getting that Good Sleep for once. god gives his toughest battles to his sleepiest warriors and all that.

#day 299 #year 4 #it me #cpap #sleep apnea #i wasnt gonna post about this initially i didnt think it was fun or interesting #and well. its not. #but u know what. when they told me this was my issue i was like Hey Wait But 26 Year Olds Dont Usually Get That #because the only people in my life who are regular cpap users are in their 60s and 70s #and i felt weird and alienated for a couple days while i waited for the machine to come in and like #it really helped me to look up posts about it from people i consider peers #PLUS i always fucking complain here about how i am So Tired All The Time and while i always assumed it was due to my OTHER chronic illnesse #i figured maybe i'd update yall on the fact that it was uh. Moderate Obstructive Sleep Apnea for likely the last. eight or so years. lmao #anyway if people tell you that you snore a lot. and you feel real fuckin eepy a lot of the time. #consider asking your doctor to order you a sleep study!

[nbodyorbit]

@for-the-better-and-worse said.

"Something for you, if you could do me the favor of looking it over. Spoils of the meeting."

— He had only watched from a distance, but something about the politician's demeanor put him on edge. He's just glad it's over, and if he notices Prowl seems equally disturbed he doesn't say anything about it. Perceptor regards the tablet for a moment before he takes it into hand.

"Of course..." he does not wait for Prowl to leave before he starts skimming over it. Lines of formulas and math and... (something nags at him, the way this is laid out. The way it keeps drawing him in.)

After a moment his brows furrow and he worries his bottom lip. "Is this... This is reminiscent of the technology that was thought to be lost with Alchemist Prime. How did... hold on there's something here..."

He continues to stare at it, there's something wrong in one of the equations, a string of letters and numbers that doesn't make sense. He freezes when he sees it. His hands don't shake anymore but his brain supplies him with the fact that they should be. He feels sick.

SAV0551250.

#【 inbox. 】 — ❝ message for the director of science incoming. ❞ #【 ic. 】 — ❝ kepler's third law and you. ❞ #forthebetterandworse #perceptor vc: HEY UH PROWL I HAVE TO GO RIGHT FUCKING NOW.

[scopophobia-polaris]

Honestly could we throw out the idea that totk's story issue is that it isn't consistent with the lore of the older games but instead drops intresting world building from botw because it might have gotten actually dark

#seriously eveeyone keeps up bring up the triforce not being the same like the older games instead of HEY why DOES the royal family just..... #have it #like all of it #and was the sheikah tech from the last game that functions the same was as light arrows/the biden blast was uh #how do i put this #how did they weaponize lightmagic in robots and does this all tie in with the “banishment” thing #or idk dropped point from botw zelda's fucking chracter arc #i know it ended with LOOOK!!!! YOU FUCKED UP BY DOING WHAT YOU THOUGHT WAS RIGHT #But damn they could of just not done that shit in totk making her just the #what was jt #idk man they just keep taking away her agency #man and it sucks cuz the dragon is so cool but mf shes forced to do it what she gonna do stay in the past and DIE? #idk man it just all feels hasty. makes me sad #and it sucks cuz a lot of shit shit is really cool and intresting but man idk i may become a botw zelda deserved a better weiter for her #becuase girl she needs a break. not saying chracters cant go through hardship #but there is something so nasty about the framing of youll never be anything but eveey past princess zelda trope and nothing more #instead of a crystal she turns into a dragon like guys this is the same as skyward sword but idk man is it werd to say #when Hylia does it aginst a thing that wants to steal the god triangles and is also a god its like yeah you had no other choice #how the fuck did one fuckass stone make ganondorf into a god like being you would think that like #mannwhy are the stones THAT powerful and why werent the other bitches able to take them down what because #did #did rauru give sonia the equivalent of the one ring at their wedding hey wait a fuck #sorry for all my spelling mistakes but what the fuck man

[getvalentined]

I do wanna say that there is one (1) Cloud Shinra theory that I really like, and it's my kid sister's, and it's that Claudia is President Shinra's estranged younger sister who had serious ideological differences and fucked off at like 14 because the old man expected her to raise Rufus after his mom died and she was like "ABSOLUTELY NOT."

This would explain why Lazard came to Nibelheim after defecting (visiting Aunt Claudia because if she could disappear and not have the company chasing her down then surely she has advice for him) and also it's just super funny to imagine Claudia being so down to clown in poor folks' town because she just hates her family so much that eating raw potatoes that she grew herself and then tore out of the ground with her bare hands is the most liberating thing she's ever experienced.

It's not a headcanon I've ever used or incorporated into anything, but it's genuinely one of the best subversions of common fanon theories that I've ever had the honor of engaging with.

#headcanon warning #fandom bullshit #claudia strife #cloud strife #lazard deusericus #cloud's file hits lazard's desk just before modeoheim #lazard goes '...uh.' #frantically buys a burner phone #calls claudia #'hey you know how you said I could call you if I was ever in a tough spot' #'yeah well I am in a tough spot and its name is WHY IS YOUR KID HERE' #'auntie I am in the middle of the most fucked up embezzling scheme in the history of the world' #'auntie this is the worst possible time for this to happen'

[definitelynotshouting]

(My prediction for the future of hunger au)

Grian: yes finally i have snuck away to the brewing stand and can convert the healing potions to harming and free my friends from the monster that is me-

[Grian has made the achievement: Local Brewery]

Everyone: :0

WKSABDJWDBKWDKEDNEKDJWJDKWNDEKDBWJDKWNDWKDJWKD

#shouting speaks #asks #grian #hunger au #hermitcraft #LOSING MY.MIND ABT THISS #CANN YOU FUCKING IMAGINE. ''HEY GUYS WHAT WAS THAT NOISE FROM OUR COMMS. UH OH'' #CRYINGGGGGGGG #txt

[moonpaw]

The uranium protagonist did not win the healthy good relationship with parents lottery

THEY DID NOT😭

#mp answers #i have a few more comics under my belt planned out on just this cause. yeah its kinda fucked up LMAO #dad is a dead beat (but hey he's trying now? but its been 10 years man) #and your mom um #well she #uh #how do you get over her threatening to kill you while getting real close to killing your father and your friend and his dad #its obvious the protag loves their dad (given the side quest post story) but also. he was a dead beat for 10 years #and he officially quit his job to be with his family after lucille was revealed #with lucille being the reason why and never you (you are a part of it but never the main reason) #lucille needs all the care she can get if she wakes up but MAN. #theres no way the protag doesnt have some kind of mommy and daddy issues #pokemon uranium

[lepusrufus]

Nothing compares to the feeling when things click in place and the planets align and you finally figure out how to properly use a character so you get to see them absolutely wreck enemies like a proud parent

#me not knowing how to play non casters was the funniest thing #for nearly 2 runs I kept looking at Astarion like uh yeah just cast missile or whatever idk what to do with you in combat #and on my THIRD I finally thought hey let's give this whole sneaking around thing a try eh? #OH #OKAY MY LITTLE ROGUEBOI SLAY I GUESS #me popping in chat with my friends one day like #oh wait you mean I'm supposed to use Rage with Karlach?? #you're telling me it does something other than making her scream and light up with a cool animal shape?? #outrageous #why is minthara not hitting #why is LAE'ZEL not hitting #what do you mean I fucked thdm over by picking shitty feats for them #Idek what Minsc's deal is he's just around to be my emotional support uncle #bg3

[theokusgallery]

Trashing that in your askbox or something *disappears in the wild*

(I know you've already seen it but idk funny)

Fun fact if you call Arsenic (normal version) babygirl he will fucking kill you

#i dont think ive posted the rant about that anywhere. mh. maybe i should #i don't post all my arsenic-related rants because they're‚ uh‚ often either spoilers or very sensitive content #as much as i love talking about him. i prefer talking about him to people who i know 1) want to see it and 2) can handle it #...which means that you guys are missing out on the little Sun characterization there is. because my boy is fucked up #anyway. this is hilarious. top 10 pictures taken seconds before a disaster #ask #tosteur-gluteal #fanart #arsenic #nicholas #this is historically accurate language. and also accurate to. the country they're in. for sure #... hey tosteur. nicholas but with the little necklace poison vial that dalhi.a hawthor.ne from hit videogame 'asexual lawer' has #imagine. #omori