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#Danika rambles about stuff
frostedlemonwriter · 2 months
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WIP Questions game
Thanks to @verba-writing for tagging me!
I will tag @winterandwords @csdarkfantasy @kaylinalexanderbooks @illarian-rambling @alinacapellabooks and an open tag, as always. :3
My questions were:
1. What was the first part of your wip that you created?
Danika, my protagonist.
2. If your story was a TV show, what would the theme song/intro be?
Duvet by Boa an Alt-Rock band from the mid-to-late 90s. I recommend everyone check them out. Her vocals are so ethereal toward the end.
3. Who are your favourite characters you've made? Why?
If you just mean this WIP, it will be both Danika and her bff Alice. Danika because I find it hard to distinguish her from having bipolar disorder, or is this stuff actually happening to her, ya know? As a sufferer of BPD I've always wanted to write a character with it. While Alice? Heh, Alice in Cyberland.
4. What other pieces of media do you think would share a fan base for your story?
Well, a very obscure anime called Serial Experiments Lain highly influenced this story. But, I'm not entirely sure. I don't think about it a lot. To be honest, I always just tell myself that no one will like what I do, and history kinda shows this. So I write for myself. No idea what fan base I'll have.
5. What has been your biggest struggle with your wip?
I don't really struggle with it too much.
6. Are there any animals in your story?
Not really. It takes place in Seattle 2049 where it has become the biggest city on the continent. Not many animals here.
7. How do your characters get around?
Danika takes the relatively new subway system. Alice drives herself, mostly.
8. What part of your wip are you working on rn?
Chapter two! Where it starts to really unfold.
9. What aspects (tropes, maybe?) of your wip do you think will draw people in?
As I mentioned before, I don't expect many people to want to read my stories. I mean, I think the most views I have on substack is 25? Which is awesome and I love every single one who reads my stories. Yet, compared to those who regularly have hundreds of views on their stories? Yeah, so I dunno.
10. What are your hopes for your wip?
What is every writer's hopes? That someone will read it and enjoy it.
As for the questions for all those I tagged. I am just gonna cheat and use the same ones here. Heh! Enjoy!
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guildtree · 1 year
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Ok ok since you said you want to talk gw1 - what has been your favorite part of it? Any unexpected things you recognized from gw2?
Oh excellent, hahaha. I have so many thoughts, long post incoming!
My favorite part has actually been the combat, which surprised me a lot because I usually prefer the faster, looser style you'd find in GW2. I think it's a huge testament to GW1's quality that I enjoy the tactical, slower combat there just as much as something that's more classically in my wheelhouse. More than that though, I like the enemy design. I was shocked at how SMART the enemies are. They resurrect each other, they target your healers, they heal themselves, etc. Different groups have different tactics and require different strategies, and you start to learn those as you go through the game. I can DPS through a krait monk's healing, for instance, but a Stone Summit dolyak rider healer will stall me forever. It's tactical and consistently challenging enough that I have fun just running around the world killing stuff, and because they stay dead it's a lot more satisfying to do that.
Seriously, the enemy design is sharp enough that I had down to a science exactly how many Afflicted it took to murder my whole party of henchmen down in the Kaineng sewers. 4 or less was an easy win for us. 5 made me pay attention. 6 was a hard fight, and any more than that would kill us, guaranteed. Oh hey, guess how many Afflicted tend to be in the patrolling groups down there? 5-6.
Couple of things I was surprised to see: First, the humor is still there. There's less of it, but from the way people talk about the first game, especially Prophecies, I was expecting a serious almost grim-dark adventure. Instead, while there are quests about losing your homeland and the trauma of that, there is also a quest where I have to find treats for a pet devourer named Joe so that it stops eating the Vanguard soldiers' rations. There's the running joke where every female henchman in Cantha has a crush on Mhenlo and Cynn is about to set them on fire for it. I think the game actually does a good job balancing humor and tragedy to make the tragedy hurt more. And like, humor is a way people process trauma, so it makes sense for Ascalonians to have a dark sense of humor.
Other surprising thing: the amount of developed female characters, especially ones that can kick your ass. Even back then ANet wasn't afraid of making women a key part of the adventure, which is refreshing compared to other MMOs of the time and even other MMOs now. 3/5 of the core henchmen you'll see on the box are female. Beyond that, there are important female characters throughout all three campaigns, like Salma, Evennia, Danika, Kormir, Gwen, and many more. And there are female villains too - I just met Varesh Ossa, for instance, and I know Minister Reiko is in there somewhere. I have some grievances, but for an older game it's pretty impressive, and it's clear the developers aren't afraid to just let women be badasses. While I wouldn't say I'm as connected to these characters yet, there are definitely some that I fell in love with. Like Danika - she's the only Kurzick with any brain cells and I love her.
Other random things I discovered: mursaat are awful bastards. Like, I knew they were terrible lorewise, but having to actually fight the floaty buggers that shoot deadly magic at you and hide behind their bulky golems makes them so much more annoying. Titans are horrifying enemies (why do the ash ones BLEED???) that I can't believe aren't talked about more, since apparently we've just got a sealed-up apocalypse hanging out down in the Fire Islands. There's another lich besides Joko!? How does that happen!? Do you just become a lich if you're a powerful necromancer whose entire nation gets destroyed?
Also the Jade Sea is like ... blue in this game. I think I like it better. You can burn down Old Kaineng though, that place is terrible.
Alright, I'll stop rambling now. Thank you for the ask!
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kaedesfleawaltz · 3 years
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My blog has been cleansed of Danganrumples
Please no more Dangleronpa
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More than just a game
Warnings: dark elements including noncon and rape, oral, fingering, doxxing, stalking, and other explicit content. 
This is dark!Jake Jensen and explicit. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.
Summary: You find a new gaming buddy but he sees you as more than that.
Note: So this is my first Jake Jensen fic and it was lots of fun so let me know what you think and hope you enjoy. :D
Thank you. Love you guys!
As always, if you can, please leave some feedback, like and reblog <3
Special shout-out to @navybrat817​ for helping me with this idea
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After too many nights scrolling through subreddits and searching for something to keep you distracted, you decided to bite the hook. Several other redditors agreed to hop on Minecraft and it had been a while since you logged in. You missed the almost relaxing ritual of mining and building.
You joined the chat, quick to hit the little microphone emblem as you listened to the voices in your headset. You learned long ago to keep your mic muted on the servers, especially with strangers. The last time you dared to speak up as a woman in a game chat, your DMs had become so overwhelmed you deleted and started a new account on Discord and changed your ID on Steam.
You were all given your tasks as players called out coordinates and you kept to chopping up the side of a mountain. You mostly worked alone, chatting through text instead of voice chat. As you placed a crafting table in your little mine, another player, JJ-Smooth, popped up and dropped some iron for you. 
He stayed close but you didn’t mind. A lot of players tried to work together the deeper they got and you were used to it. As you uncovered some lava, he dumped water before you could get burned and helped you hack up the obsidian. 
He thanked you on the voice chat but you knew any courtesy in return would earn you the attention of the entire server. So you dropped some gold for him and went on your way.
“I hear a zombie,” he warned.
You turned to hack up the undead before it could get you, only to be shot by a skeleton hidden on the next level. Another appeared and you died before you could hide, the bony villain killed by your ally as you watched your possession scatter over the death screen.
“Hey, I got your stuff,” he said as you loaded back up, “I’ll find you.”
You typed quickly in the chat, ‘sorry, mic busted, give me your coordinates and I’ll come to you.’
You waited as ‘JJ-Smooth is typing…’ appeared at the bottom and finally he sent the numbers. You hopped over the blocky hills and through the forests until you found the mine again. He was just outside and handed over all your tools and ration. He headed back into the mine and you followed him. This time, you began your own path in the opposite direction.
Before you knew it, you’d lost track of time. You sat back as you realised it was only you and JJ on the server. The silence should have tipped you off earlier. He was the host and you felt super awkward for staying so long. You typed that you were logging off for the night and thanked him. 
You hit the keyboard with your knuckle and yawned as you opened the screen, 
“God, it’s late,” you muttered.
“Hello?” he said.
Your eyes rounded as you looked at the mic symbol and the lack of red line made you cringe. You’d hit an extra button without noticing.
“Um, hi, sorry, I just--”
“Mic busted, huh?” he asked.
“No, I--” you didn’t know what to say, “anyways, I should--”
“So, you’re a chick? Is that why you mute?”
“Uh, well, it’s just… easier, sorry, I--” even if you weren’t trying to hide from gamer dudes, you weren’t the best at conversation.
“A gamer girl, nice,” he said and you sighed, “sorry, that sounded weird, didn’t it?”
“Mhmm,” you touched your bottom lip as you cupped your chin, “it’s late, I have to work tomorrow.”
“You comin’ back?” he asked, almost hopeful.
“I don’t know--”
“I won’t tell anyone,” he said abruptly, “promise, lips sealed.”
“I really don’t know if I can do this too much, I usually work early mornings so… yeah,” you said.
“I get it but you know you’re always welcome, hope you don’t mind if I send you an invite now and then. No pressure,” he offered.
“Uh, sure,” you shrugged, “okay, yeah, good night.”
You left the chat quickly and pulled off your headset. Shit.
‘I’m Jake by the way,’ a pm popped up, ‘gg.’
You typed back, ‘gg, it was fun’ and quickly logged out. You sat back and rubbed your eyes. Well, he didn’t seem like a total creep, maybe just a bit awkward but so were you. You shut down for the night and stretched out as you switched off the lamp. You were going to pay for your session in the morning.
🎮
A few nights later you got an invite to the server. You debated it but as it was Friday, you decided to make good use of the PC you’d saved up forever to build. You spawned in the middle of nowhere and built a bed before you found the half-finished settlement. You joined the chat but you must have been early as you were the only one there.
You headed back to the same mine, some work done since the first night, and laid your torches as you ventured into the depths. You jumped in your seat as a voice broke your peace.
“I don’t think anyone else is gonna join,” JJ-Smooth, or Jensen said, “you think maybe you’ll unmute?”
You stopped your mining and stared at the screen. You hovered over the mic button and re-read his name, he was the only other one there. You clicked and gave a strained smile to the screen.
“So, um, what’s the goal tonight?” you asked.
“Get some materials and go back to the settlement, keep building, oh, maybe we could try a portal, you ever gone to the nether?” he said but before you could reply he kept on, “shit, I shouldn’t assume, you seem like an experienced player.”
“Yeah, a few times, but I’m more a casual miner,” you went back to harvesting stone and ore.
“Ah,” he said, and it was silent for a moment, “so, you work again in the morning?”
“Not tomorrow,” you said as you focused on the game, “daycare isn’t open on the weekends.”
“A daycare, huh? That sounds fun, I love kids… not in a weird way but you know, I… urgh, I have a niece,” he said with a nervous chuckle, “nah, that’s cool though, sounds more fun than my gig.”
“Oh?” you turned and kept your axe moving.
“IT. You know, some people would be like ‘hey Jensen, why do you spend all your free time staring at a screen when that’s what you do at work?’” he scoffed, “well, who says I’m not mining there too.”
You wrinkled your forehead and gave a small laugh. He was rambling and it was kinda odd. You were happy for once not to be the strange one.
“But anyway,” he said, “I found lots of diamond over here. If we get some lapis lazuli we can build an enchanting table and get some sick armour.”
“Awesome,” you pressed your fingertips to your lip as you leaned on your elbow, “should try to head back before dark…”
“Hard to tell down here. How about you mine and I’ll keep an eye out for monsters?” he offered.
“Sure,” you agreed as he came onto your screen, “that works.”
🎮
Another week went by and you ventured back into the server a few times but not for very long as late nights did not mix with young children. The next weekend, you joined again on Saturday night and like the last few times it was just you and Jensen. You wondered why no one else was joining when the subreddit was so popular but you didn’t worry about it for long.
You mostly played in silence, Jensen did most of the talking and it was never about anything more than the game or his niece’s last soccer game. That night when you left the game, he kept typing on Discord.
‘I like playing with you,’ his message blipped up.
‘Same, thx.’
‘Really, you’re awesome.’
‘Thx :) Tired, gotta sleep.’
‘Sweet dreams.’
‘Night.’
You changed your status to offline and dragged yourself to bed. You opened your phone as you laid in the dark and went to the subreddit, you scrolled through the builds and screenshots of other people’s catastrophes. 
You came to Jensen’s last invite post from that night but all the comments complained that the world code was incorrect. Hmm, you should tell him next time.
You blackened your cell and plopped it on your night table. You rolled over and buried your face in the pillow, the light still etched into your vision. You fell asleep quickly and woke the next day to another invite from Jensen.
‘How about some Fortnite? If you’re into it?’
‘Srry, can’t, my mom’s expecting me for lunch.’
‘2 bad, maybe later.’
‘Maybe’.
You got ready to go see your mother for your usual Sunday afternoon visit and it went by like any other. When she asked you what you’d been up to, you didn’t mention the gaming, she was never a fan of it. When you got back home, Jensen was messaging you again. You didn’t open the notification and settled in to catch up on some streaming before another week of work.
Monday hit you like a train and you were glad you hadn’t spent the night mining again. If you had, you doubted you’d even be able to open your eyes. You got to the daycare centre and welcomed in the kids. You got them set up for the morning snack then cleaned up as Sandy took them over to the reading circle.
You wiped the tables and then did some painting before you went out for some play time in the yard. As you watched several of the children on the swings, you glanced around. There was a man across the street. You squinted through the chain link as he seemed to be watching but assured yourself it was nothing as he quickly headed for the corner and disappeared.
Inside, the kids were due for quiet time, some napped and those who didn’t, stared at the ceiling and yawned. You could have joined them but knew that wouldn’t be acceptable. The end of the day came and you helped the kids pack up their paintings and their sweaters. You waited in the yard with them as the parents showed up and handed them off one by one.
You waved to Danika as she clung to her mother and your eye was once more drawn beyond the chain link. The same faded grey jacket, the same glasses, and the hat with the frayed brim. It was a better look at the man. Was he looking at you? Why on earth was he hanging around outside a daycare?
“Sandy,” you turned and lowered your voice as she neared, “see that man?”
She peeked over and shrugged, “which one? The guy crossing the street?”
You looked up again and like before, he was walking away casually as if he hadn’t just been staring through the fence. You shook your head and huffed. “Sorry, never mind.”
“Ah, don’t worry about it,” she waved her fingers, “come on, let’s clean up.”
With the kids all sorted out, you went back in and tidied up the last of their mess. You and Sandy were friendly but like with any, you weren’t very talkative. You never really knew what to say but you were never unkind.
You pulled on your jacket and checked your purse for your phone and wallet. You checked the time and turned off the lights. You bid Sandy goodbye as she headed for her SUV and you took your usual route down the sidewalk towards your bus stop. 
You stopped short as the man was there. You were paranoid, he must just be waiting for the same route. You approached and he turned to watch you as you sat on the bench. He smiled and the dread sank deep in your chest. 
His rectangular glasses gave light to his blue eyes and a goatee trimmed his jaw. He was tall and well-built, you could tell even under his comic book tee. He was going to talk to you, another weirdo in the city.
“Hey,” his voice was chillingly familiar, “how was your day?”
You stared at him and blinked cluelessly. You looked around, it was only the two of you. You opened your mouth but you had to be wrong. He said your name and you winced.
“Jensen?” you breathed as you stood and squeezed the strap of your bag, “why? How--?”
“You weren’t answering me, I was worried,” he said, “just making sure you’re okay.”
“What the-- I don’t understand how--” He stepped closer and you backed up against the bench. “Don’t, I’ll scream.”
“Scream? Why? I’m just-- You know me, it’s me, Jensen.”
“You doxxed me?” you snapped, “what the hell?”
“No, I didn’t-- I’m just checking on you--”
“I don’t know you,” you said as your heart began to race, “so please, leave me alone,” you edged away from him, “and don’t message me again.”
You sprinted across the street and as you came up on the curb, you looked back at him. He watched you but didn’t follow. You could tell from there he wasn’t happy but the brim of his cap shadowed most of his face so you couldn’t guess if it was hurt or anger. You quickly spun away and continued down the next street to the nearest stop.
You couldn’t believe he’d just shown up like that. You couldn’t believe he would think that was okay. You couldn’t believe he’d think that much about you.
🎮
You blocked Jensen on Discord and left his world on Minecraft. That night you were shaky and nervous, afraid that he would show up at your apartment. Did he know where you lived? He must if he could figure out where you worked.
You didn’t open Steam that night. You paced your small apartment, jumping at every noise. Sleep didn’t come easily but in shallow spurts that left you even more tired. You watched over your shoulder as you walked to your stop and boarded with one eye on the door.
Work was little better as you found yourself distracted in the room full of toddlers. Sandy asked if you were okay as you kneaded play-do violently. You shook yourself out of your paranoia and assured her you were only short on sleep, not a complete lie.
You took out your phone when you stepped out for a small break. Your mom had called but you would have to get back to her when you had two hours to waste. There was another notification, that one from Discord, a friend request from JJ-NoRematch. It wasn’t hard to guess who it was and you declined it right away.
There were several others from Jensen, too. He followed your Insta, blocked; he followed your mostly empty twitter, blocked; and he even commented on your LinkedIn like a weird. You closed your phone and took a breath before you headed back into the kids, their voices rising in their excitement to go outside.
In the yard, you had another look around, expecting to see him there on the other side of the fence. You were slightly relieved when he wasn’t but still on edge. You joined a game of tag then watched several of the kids line up for the slide. You lost yourself in your job as you told yourself he must have gotten the hint, at least not to bother you irl.
Just like the day before, and every day, you left work and headed for your stop. He wasn’t there either and you sat down and phoned your mom, hanging up as the bus pulled up with a promise to call her again when you were home. At home, you felt almost normal again and checked your notifications; no more follows, no more requests, nothing.
Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday passed in a similar fashion. Each saw your anxieties less than the day before. You even resolved to open Steam and start a new world for yourself. You spent hours mining and almost fell asleep in your chair. When you nearly tipped over, you decided it was time for bed.
You slept better than you had all week and woke up before noon. You wanted to log right back on but you had life to deal with; groceries, cleaning, and of course, making that call to your mother you’d delayed the night before. After all that, you felt accomplished and you decided to treat yourself to take out, a rare divulgence.
You called the local Chinese eatery and waited eagerly for your feast as you turned on a new episode of your current binge. You played on your phone until the battery was low and had enough juice to buzz up the delivery man. You dug for your wallet as you went to the door and unlocked it without looking up.
“How much--” you asked as you opened the door.
Your eyes met a familiar pair, two blue gems behind a pair of narrow glasses. Jensen wore the same cap and held the paper bag of take-out with a smile. You grabbed the door and tried to swing it shut but he was too quick as he slapped a large hand against the peeling paint.
“It’s on me,” he said, “I love spare ribs.”
“What the--” you gasped as you pushed on the door helplessly, “please go away.”
“You’re not answering me,” he said as he stepped closer and forced you back as his body brushed against yours, “you blocked me and I can’t even get a hey, Jensen, how are you?”
“I don’t want you here,” you tried to shove him and he shouldered you away easily, “get out!”
He slammed the door and you flinched. He put the bag down on the corner table and reached back to twist the lock without a look. His eyes roved around your entryway and further into your apartment. He smiled as they stilled and focused on you.
“This place is cute… like you,” he said and you heard a slight hesitation in his voice.
You swallowed and backed away from him. You spun on your heel and ran for your couch. You reached over the back to your phone and unlocked it as the battery icon flashed. You had just enough juice to make the call. You dialed as you turned back to him.
“I’m calling the police so you b-better l-leave,” you warned as your voice and hands shook, “I me--”
He was quick and before you could pull away, he swiped your cell out of your hand. He scoffed and tossed it across the room. It hit the wall and landed screen down on the hardwood. You bit down and pressed yourself to the couch. You stared at him and kicked yourself forward as you tried to slip past him. He caught you and wrestled you back into the front room.
“Why are you doing this?” he asked calmly as you struggled in his grasp, “I’ve been nothing but nice to you.”
“N-no, you’re-- you-- let me go,” you stammered as he angled you around the couch. He pushed you down so you bounced on the cushion. You tried to push yourself up and he pointed his finger in your face and wagged it. 
“No, you stay,” he growled and wiped his other hand on his jeans. He was nervous, even if he was angry.
“Please, why-- what do you want?” you grasped the cushion and hovered at the edge of the couch.
He sighed and sat in the chair. He took his hat off and set it on the table as he ran his fingers through his short hair. 
“Good question,” he said as his jaw squared and his eyes turned to pinpoints, “better one, why did you block me?”
“Are you serious? You-- you--” you struggled to get your words out, your voice even more splintered by your fear, “you doxxed me, you came to-- to my work-- and…”
“I thought we were getting along. I thought you liked me,” he said with a frown, “I really did, you sure acted like it and-- I only wanted to make sure you were safe.”
“But why wouldn’t I be? I--” you shivered and crossed your arms as you withered beneath his gaze, “Jensen, this was only supposed to be online.”
He scoffed and stomped his boot on the floor. He shook his head as he looked to the ceiling and his anger bulged along his temple. He tilted his head and looked at you again.
“You know, for years, I have been a nice guy, I am a nice guy,” he pushed his shoulders to his ears as he threw his hand out, “I’m so patient and caring and you girls, you don’t even give me a second look.”
“Jensen--”
“No, really, I mean look at you, you’re no supermodel and yet it’s the same thing, ‘let’s just be friends’,” he spat, “but I watch guys all the time treat women like shit and they don’t have any trouble at all, they got them hanging off of them and I’m a creep for giving them a compliment or opening the door--”
“I don’t… know you,” you eked out, “you have to understand--”
“I don’t understand,” he stood abruptly, “I’m done trying to understand.”
He pulled his jacket open and slid it down his arms. You watched him sling it over the chair and as he turned back to you, you stood. He caught your shoulders and held you in place. His strength was plain in his grip as he squeezed then slowly moved his hands to cradle your face.
“I just wanna be nice,” he said as he leaned in. You tried to pull away but he moved a hand around the back of your head and forced your lips against his. He poked his tongue inside your mouth roughly as you tried to shove him away. Finally, he parted, his hands still firmly around your head, “wasn’t that nice?”
“Please,” you begged as he ran his thumb over your bottom lip.
His eyes searched your face as you stared back at him in terror. He sighed and dropped his hands back to your shoulders. He pushed you down to the sofa harshly and backed away.
“Fine, I won’t be nice,” he snarled as he took his glasses off and folded them carefully. He put them on the table beside his cap and twined his fingers together, loudly cracking his knuckles.
You blinked at him as your eyes grew glossy. You brought your legs up under you and pressed yourself to the back of the couch. You grasped the upholstery and turned as you launched yourself over to the other side. You stumbled as you landed on your feet and ran for the door.
You were yanked back as he snaked his arms around you and took you off your feet. You kicked out and screamed but it was cut off by his palm as he kept one arm around your middle. You scratched at his hand as he dragged you back to the couch. He pushed you face down onto the cushions and planted his knee in the middle of your back, slipping his hand away as he put enough weight on you to keep your voice suffocated.
“Listen, I know I look like some IT nerd but I’m a lot more than that, now don’t make me hurt you,” he played with your hair as he smiled down at you, “you try that again and I will shut you up and if someone hears you, I can take care of them too.”
You sniffed as tears pricked in your eyes and nodded frantically as it felt as if he would snap your spine. He pushed off of you and you stayed as you were, paralysed with fear. He sat and unlaced his boots one at a time. He looked up as he set them neatly beside the foot of the chair and he bent to catch your eye.
“Well?” he pointed at you and traced the line of your body in the air, “let’s go.”
You stared at him dumbly and he stood to pull his tee over his head. His torso was sculpted perfectly and his chest trimmed with hair that trailed all the way down to his pants. He stepped forward and tugged at the back of your shirt.
“You want me to do it for you, baby?” he purred, “I can help you.”
You swatted him away and sat up. You bent your legs to your chest and hugged them. “Please, I’m scared, just leave me alone--”
His hand rested on his belt and exhaled again. His fingers moved swiftly to unloop the striped belt and unbutton his jeans. He pushed them down, nearly tripping as he stepped out of them. He stood in his boxers, tented with his impatient excitement, and gripped his hips.
“It’s okay, baby, I know you’re shy, I am too,” he neared and you winced as he grabbed your wrist. He tugged on your arm and you resisted until he bent your hand back painfully and you cried out. He tickled your jaw as he looked you in the eye and tutted, “it doesn’t have to be like this, alright?”
You went limp and let him pull your arms apart. Your legs slipped down and your feet dangled above the floor. He got to his knees and pushed between yours. He slowly rolled up the hem of your shirt and bent to kiss your stomach as he bared the flesh. You trembled as he forced your arms up and swooped the fabric over your head. It fluttered through the air and to the floor as he cupped your tits through your bright pink bra.
“Is this so bad?” he asked as he nuzzled your chest and pushed your tits up. 
He glided the straps down your arm and slid your bra lower so that you popped out. He nibbled at your flesh and traced your nipples with his tongue. You sat rigid and let him explore your body, too terrified to move a muscle. He reached around you and struggled with the hooks, frustrated he snapped the clasps and the band came free.
He continued to play with your chest, his fingers crawling up and down your stomach and sides. There was a genuine curiosity to his touch and it sent a chill through you. His fingertips pressed to the top of your pants and he pulled at them as his lips travelled down to your hip.
He tugged on your pants and jerked your entire body. He tore them lower as he pushed you up and you lifted yourself to let him peel away the layer. He added them to the floor and toyed with the elastic of your panties. The little bow in the front drew his attention as he pushed your legs wider and ran his nose along the cotton.
He hummed and rubbed his fingers down your crotch, pushing the fabric to your folds as he teased you through them. You inhaled sharply at the tingle it inspired and he pressed firmer against you, flicking his fingers along your bud as he noticed how it made you squirm.
He gently pulled aside the cotton and you felt his hot breath against you. You pushed on his head before he could delve into you. “Please, don’t--”
“Shhhh,” he threw your hand away from his head and bent over you, “just relax.”
He dragged his tongue along your cunt and lingered around your clit. You clenched as it sent a thrill through you and he moved his lips against you, suckling at you bud as your breaths grew raspy. You pushed yourself against the back of the couch and dug your nails into the cushion.
He slid a finger along your cunt and circled your entrance. He rubbed up and down as he kept his tongue swirling over your clit and you swallowed back as gasp as he poked inside. He felt around and added another finger, stretching you as he carefully pushed them in and out of you in time with his mouth.
He lapped you up and you closed your eyes, desperate to resist the coil winding within you. Your legs tensed against the couch and you tilted your pelvis without thinking. He sped up, the noise of his mouth and your slickness filled the silence. You let out a puff and moaned as you slapped the couch. The waves rolled over your flesh and you came into his mouth with a pathetic mewl.
He stilled his fingers as he lazily teased you with his tongue. He pulled his fingers out and sat back, the heat between your legs cooling in his absence as he licked up your juices. He watched you as he sucked his fingers and stood. Your head lolled and you edged forward on the couch. You tried to stand but he caught you and flung you back.
“We’re not done, baby,” he winked at you as he grasped the top of his boxers, “go on, lay down.”
You murmured your refusal and once more tried to get up. You slipped onto the floor and shakily crawled away as he dropped his boxers to his ankle. He grabbed you before you could get around the side and lifted you easily. He turned you and shoved you down onto your back as he lifted a leg over you.
He straddled you and again his hands roved over your body. You smacked at his fingers weakly but he easily ignored you. He kept one hand moving along your curves as he stroked himself with the other. He groaned and shook as he stroked his dick. Your eyes followed his hand and you gulped, he was thick.
He moved his knees back and pushed them up beneath your thighs as he kept a hand planted on your chest. He ripped your panties down your legs and untangled them from your feet. 
He held you down as he ran his tip along your cunt, wetting himself with your coerced arousal. You groaned and grabbed the arm of the couch above you. You tried to pull away from him.
He pushed against your entrance and you looked at him in shock. You couldn’t stop him. His eyes were set between your legs as he inhaled and slowly eased into you. He gasped as he got his tip inside you and his muscles tensed. He bit his lip as he dove further in and you gasped as he filled you inch by inch.
“Shitttt,” he moaned as he reached his limit and you whined at how full you were, “oh, baby.”
His hand slid from your chest and he gripped your hips as he pulled back and thrust. You exclaimed and he did it again, slowly as he watched himself impale you over and over. You curled your fingers against the couch arm and your feet arch as you pressed your thighs around him. He lifted your pelvis high as he angled his dick even deeper.
“You feel so good,” he rasped, “oh, baby, you’re so good. Ahh-hh-hh,” his voice fizzled as your walls clenched him and you closed your eyes as you felt the heat building. 
He moved his hand along your thigh and stretched it over your pelvis, pushing his thumb to your clit as he kept his pace. He purred as you writhed helplessly against him and you panted through the rising ecstasy.
“Please, please, please…” you chanted, unsure if you were begging him to stop or for more.
He moaned as he sped up and you sucked your lip under your teeth as you neared your peak. You quivered as your orgasm crashed into you and you let out a strangled cry. He snarled and planted his hands beside your head as he leaned over you, his hot breath tickled your face as he pounded into you.
Your legs bent around him as his pelvis rubbed against you and the friction drove you to another climax. You held onto the arm of the couch as he fucked your harder and harder. He kissed you and nibbled at your lip as he groaned and hooked an arm under to hold you close.
“You’re gonna make me cum, baby,” he said against your cheek and you turned your head away from, “ah, here I--”
He spasmed and slammed into you. He took several long thrusts and stilled. He grunted and drew heavy breaths as he rested his weight over you. He grabbed your head and turned your head up as he pressed his forehead to yours. You kept your eyes closed as the flames slowly dwindled.
“Was that so bad?” he stroked your cheek and trailed his finger down to poke between your lips, “No, it’s what you wanted, isn’t it, baby?” he wiggled his hips and you hissed, “yeah, you want me.”
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whumpkitty · 3 years
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Whumpay Day 3: Holding Back Tears
Him sad ;-; Tried writing something for them in my more descriptive style, usually saved for my philosophical rambles haha but. I guess that’s more or less what Dani is doing here so.
ALSO I DID NOT PROOF READ THIS I COULD NOT FOCUS BRAIN LONG ENOUGH SORRY.
TWs: Toxic relationship, brief mentions of the following; things in skin, drugs, death (sort of, it’s more metaphorical), implication of needles
Timeframe: A while after Danika has been Andrik’s Jewel
Danika watched as the golden threads so long a part of him glinted coldly in the moonlight. His eyes followed the icy glimmer tiredly as he slowly rotated his arm back and forth, watching the light catch on the gemstones and cast a momentary star into the air. Watching as it blinked out of existence, died so easily as he tilted his arm just a fraction of a centimeter to the side.
They all died so very easily.
Almost like they were never there to begin with. If he hadn’t seen the little spark with his own eyes, no one would have ever known it existed. Almost like his love.
He glanced at Andrik, sound asleep next to him. Danika should be sleeping too, it was well into the quiet hours of the morning, but he’d been finding it difficult ever since… well. Ever since. He’d worried Andrik several times with how sickly he had become and how often the mafia lord walked in on him wavering only to pass out a few seconds later. Exhaustion was taking a toll on him, but it was still better than giving in to more of Andrik’s drugs or the nightmares.
Although he could barely call them nightmares, they were more. Memories. Twisted and distorted till he could barely recognize them. And yet Danika was certain they had happened. They had to have. He couldn’t imagine how he could have loved Andrik without at least some of the memories being real, couldn’t imagine how he could still love him, somewhere inside himself that was protected from the ice that grew colder every day.
Danika continued playing with the gold, though it looked less like gold and more like silver in the dark. Silver. Hope, love, and kindness. False in both its glitter and promises.
~
Danika dropped an enormous book down on the table with a thud.
“That’s so big though! Did you really read all that?” Andrik’s skeptical tone earned him a stuck out tongue.
“I told you I didn’t read it all, I haven’t had time. I was just looking through it, and found some cool stuff! It’s all about magic and symbols and things like that. I thought you liked that?”
Andrik nodded, looking somewhat more interested at the mention of magic but still giving the admittedly very large tome an appraising look. Danika sighed and opened it to somewhere in the middle, flipping through till he reached a page covered with illustrations of precious gems and metals. Andrik perked up, leaning over the book himself, eyes running over the shining ink.
“You want to be a jeweler like your grandpa, right? So I figured you’d be interested in this! It’s all meanings and magical importance of jewels and stuff like that.”
Andrik turned the book towards himself, skimming the page. Danika pointed to a section edged in silver whorls, grinning as he spoke.
“This one is my favourite, it’s about silver,” he turned his head a bit, reading the passage out loud albeit slowly as he tried to decipher the upside down words. “Silver is a precious metal and, like gold, often symbolizes riches and wealth. It is believed to be a mirror to the soul, helping us to see ourselves as others see us. It represents and magnifies hope, mystic visions, kindness, sensitivities, psychic abilities, tenderness, meditation, and unconditional love,” he looked up at Andrik. “Isn’t that pretty?”
The other boy nodded and looked up as well, smiling widely at Danika.
“Yeah, it’s really pretty.”
~
Danika closed his eyes, leaning back against the headboard.
It goes so quickly, doesn’t it? Just like the little stars, here one moment and gone the next, no trace whatsoever. The warm summer days evaporating like so much nothing and the soft kisses blowing away on the wind, replaced with this mockery of a romance. Dreams of the future morphing into horrors that he had to find a way to live through.
Unconditional love and hope. His false silver didn’t do what it was supposed to, but did he really expect it to? It was fake, after all, like everything else, only what he wanted it to be when it was least useful. It would turn back to gold soon enough and with it would come all the wealth and grandeur and broken smiles.
More silver glinted in the moonlight, tracking down his cheek, cold and real.
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Book Review: House of Earth and Blood (Crescent City #1) by Sarah J. Maas
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House of Earth and Blood by Sarah J. Maas
This review is going to be LITTERED with SPOILERS because idk how to talk about this book without giving away the whole plot.
Consider yourself officially warned. 
I’m still debating on my rating, but for now here is my review. Fair warning: it is rant-y and ramble-y and hasn't been edited yet. I'll clean it up when I come back for a rating.
As always, content warnings are listed at the bottom!
Overall Positives:
• SJM has actually included a few gay characters….now they are all very minor side characters (Isiah, Fury, Juniper, and Declan) who are only present for maybe 3% total of the novel, but at least they exist??? So she gets points for actually having gay characters who aren’t killed off. You can say that she’s making an effort.
• The banter between Bryce and Hunt was pretty funny
• That scene with the knock-off My Little Pony dolls was funny
• I think there might've been a reference in the book to First Aid Kit (the sister folk duo) and it made my heart squeal because I love that band SO MUCH!
• Bryce actually has a great relationship with her mom and her stepfather! And they are both alive! And stay alive! I’m actually struggling to recall a book I’ve read where the main character in the book has a). both parents alive and b). a great relationship with them both. So that was really refreshing!
• Hunt in a sunball cap.
• Bryce and Hunt taking photos together. Way too adorable.
• Ride or die friendship. I love books that emphasize the importance of friendship.
• That LIGHT IT UP DANIKA LIGHT IT UP LIGHT IT UP scene....like i felt that...her happiness. so sweet. i teared up at that scene ngl....
• Pretty good depiction of grief. How even after years the pain of losing your friend doesn’t go away. How some people cut themselves off to cope and others don’t. How some take out their anger on the closest target. How some people remember the dead one’s birthday and other don’t. etc. etc.
• It really was a slow burn because they like didn’t even kiss until 75% into the 3,000 page book.
• Rhun is my favorite character in this book. He’s a goth softie king. I also loved the Demon Cat. And Fury. And Declan. And Flynn. And Isaiah. And Hunt. And Lele. And the dog. And Jesiba. And Randall. And….well….that’s about it….
• I have recently been getting more and more into Urban Fantasy so I am excited and glad that this book is UF. I also like how it takes place in a different world with a different history (although for some reason I went into this book under the impression it takes place in New Orleans…)
Overall Negatives:
• If I ever have to see the word “alphahole” again it will still be too soon. I get that she was going for meta and trying to poke fun at how the trope in so many UF books includes an alphamale love interest….but it just doesn’t really work because none of the guys she was calling an alphahole was actually acting like one??? Okay so this is kind of ramble-y but whatever. When I think of an alphamale love interest acting like a…*shudders*…. alphahole I think of the stereotypical shifter romance/erotica novel where the guy likes wants to punch any guy who stands too close or talks to his mate. I think of him making outrageous claims, always posting a guard, never letting her leave the house, etc. all without any cause. Having a literal demon serial killer who (at this point in the book) you believe RIPPED APART AN ENTIRE PACK OF WEREWOLVES and is killing everyone who is close to working on the same case as you and you are a half-fae who NEVER carries a weapon with you, doesn’t have magic, and no one beside your mom, stepdad, and dead bestie know that you can turn into a flashlight at will…..yeah it makes sense that the people who care about you would like you to have a guard. But that’s not “alphahole” behavior. Nor is when you’re starving yourself from guilt him being concerned and wanting you to eat, or wanting you to try to take care of yourself….that’s not “alphahole” behavior, it’s being a good friend/sibling. If someone wanted a guard on her PRIOR to her investigating the murder than yeah….that would be “alphahole” 100%. But that’s not what happened…one of the highlights of the book was Hunt calling out Bryce by telling her that she is actually the “alphahole” here.
• Fucking sunball = baseball. WHYYYYYY I thought it was soccer for so long until Hunt tossed on a “sunball cap”
• I thought that Violet Hall from Pucked was the most infuriating main character I have read in a long time until I met Bryce fucking Quinnland. It is a pet peeve of mine when a character acts like someone (usually lazy or a partier) and then gets pissed because people think they are how they act??? Like, if you act like an asshole then don’t be shocked if people think you are an asshole. Also she was someone who was terribly selfish and stupidly reckless for no reason for 99% of the book. Yeah she’s ride or die for her friends which is supposed to be her best quality but she is just terribly rude to so many people. Like take Lele for example. Bryce treated her horribly until Hunt was sold again, then was friends with Lele for like a week which someone equated to Lele being willing to die for her???
• Part two of that bullet above^: Why was everyone willing to die for Bryce? Maybe I hate Bryce because she reminds me too much of Jane Salone from The Bold Type with her ‘I’m always right’ attitude. But yeah, everyone is willing to die for her. I don’t get why though. Also everyone wants to fuck her. She can’t walk down the street without like five dudes wanting to fuck her. It was so annoying. Also how the hell has she not died by age 25!?!? There is a different between being bitchy with your algebra teacher versus being bitchy with some guy who could smite you before you blink. And all of them are like ‘oooh she’s not afraid of me like everyone else how charming’ and I’m just like NO. That’s like if I intentionally pissed off some mafia dom and instead of making an example out of me for dissing him in front of his mafia bros, he’s like ‘oooh you’re sassy wanna fuck?’ MAKES NO SENSE!!!
•Part three of the above^: okay before someone comes at me and says ‘well would you be saying the same things if she was a guy doing an acting this way’ well probably. I love the KATE DANIELS (Magic Bites) series. And Kate is a no-nonsense, can come across rude, and gives zero fucks what anyone else thinks about her. Kind of like Bryce, but less bitchy and has the power and skills to back up her recklessness. (No one around Bryce learns of her secret lightbright gift or of her sharpshooting skills until the very end so I am maintaining my ‘she’s reckless’ viewpoint based on everyone around her not knowing of her abilities when she does all of this dumbshit). Kate also is a fucking martyr who runs towards danger even when the odds are against her. Just like Bryce. But I love Kate and hate Bryce. So…yeah I think it was just a Bryce issue. It took until about 41% with the whole phone-Sandriel thing for me to stop finding her insufferable….but I still never really liked her after that...I could stand her for the occasional paragraph or two
• Speaking of martyrs…why is everyone one in this book!?!? NOT EVERYONE NEEDS TO BE A MARTYR!!!
• Another reason I hate Bryce (yes I’m back on that Bryce shit) is because after Hunt broke her heart he immediate thought upon learning who he was going to be sold (back to his old owner who is a sadistic fuck) her thought was good, he deserves it and all he did was break her heart and not want to be a slave anymore and kept something he knew would destroy you (which yeah, keeping that secret furthered his cause but still…) and I just????? Have???? No words???? Like girl you have a RIGHT to be PISSED but jfc that doesn’t equate to TORTURE.
• Ugh and then her whole ‘take me instead’ bullshit was so reminiscent of that Jules and Emma whipping scene from Lady Midnight I almost gagged for the level of cheese and martyr-syndrome 
• Why is everyone described as “brown,” “golden brown,” or “tan”?! It’s like SJM is trying to not make everyone white but doesn’t want to fully commit…
• And was anyone uncomfortable/cringed at the ‘white angel wings are supreme to any wings with color’ bit....
• I hate books where the werewolves can talk outloud in human form. I cringed.
• Why was the calling people by their last name thing not consistent? I’ve read books before where characters flip between using another character’s first and last name, but there is context behind why they choose one or the other: the professional setting, if the person is happy or upset, who is being addressed, etc. But you’ll get Hunt calling Bryce “Bryce” and “Quinnland” within a sentence of each other? And literally every character did stuff like this. It was weird and not consistent at all.
Negatives About the Plot:
• This book really felt like three books in one: Part One (first 12ish%) being the day leading up to the Pack of Devil’s murder. And I do mean like every boring thing that happened. Part Two (the next 66ish%) being the murder investigation. Part Three (the last 22ish%) being where all the action occurred. The book felt like it couldn’t decide what it wanted to be. The summary promised a murder investigation so I was expecting it to be a KATE DANIELS-esque plot. But nothing of true importance really occurred during that investigation. We got some cool flashbacks with Danika, and some sweet moments between Hunt and Bryce…but that’s it. SJM isn’t Brandon with a Stormlight Archives (The Way of Kings) complicated interwoven plot. I think the book as whole would have been better if it was about 300 pages shorter.
• Nothing in the plot of true importance happened until the last 100 pages or so.
• I mean we literally got every single thing that happened during every single day of their investigation…it was….too much detail.
• When I got to 80% like every other chapter felt like the book should end. It could’ve ended on a cliffhanger. Like right after Hunt was found on that boat. But nope….
• Figures. SJM can’t have a main couple unless they both are super special. Did anyone else feel like she just recycled parts of ACOMAF in this book? Hunt: has wings and super special powers. Bryce: absorbs some super-fae juiced up power from a cauldron—er….I mean arch—to get extra powers and become the most super cool and super special fae in all existence because god forbid we have a heroine who isn’t the most physically powerful person ever. I mean, to hell with mental strength. Must be physically magically powerful or you’re no good!
• The only plot points that surprised me were the hunt being at the drug bust (because we got nothing from his povs that he was remotely interested in going back down that revolution road especially after his whole meeting with Briggs…still iffy with this one, because his thoughts in that cell sound like he actually was on board with it until he called it off because the drug is too dangerous but his call to the viper queen said she owed him a favor so…..) and Micah’s weird horn hard-on. Literally nothing else surprised me...
• I really though Reid would play a bigger role considering Bryce used to date him and is fam is responsible for that drug....but nope. The dude is like never even mentioned.
• Ugh...that villain speech. Maybe I'm just like...what's the point? Why not just zap the bitch why do you need to tell her your life story!?!?!
• Also let's be real, Danika's password never would have been allowed to be that simple nor remain unchanged for 2 years. But whatever.
• It’s also pretty cringe that Bryce freed Lele just for her to die…………..
• Why is Jesiba’s shop impenetrable (the building and cameras) until it’s convenient for it not to be…I mean it sounded like nothing could break into her building or the cameras but then… Micah just easily waltzed in there and Declan easily hacked into the security cameras….makes no sense but okayyyyyyy…..
• ....or about how the dog can teleport and undo locks until once again it's convenient for him not to be able to so she can dramatically save the day (look I also have issues with her valuing her pet's life over Lele's in that scene...also isn't the dog supposed to be like terrifying, it could've fought while her and Lele got out. not really sure how the water which delayed him like two seconds helped more than her dog would've....look, i love pets and i don't want him to die but i don't want Lele to die either!)
• Bryce and Hunt literally never have a talk about everything???? Like I get the world almost ended but neither of them had a thought like I know we need to talk about everything that happened on the boat. About if his love for Shahar trumps his love for me. But that can wait… Because those were all fears she had before but now vanished???? I get not wanted to have verbal talk but a thought from Bryce would’ve been nice.
• How can you run, carry a sword, and shoot a gun all at the same time? Still trying to figure out the logistics of that all....
• Why is SJM's adult book the least smutty thing she has written so far!?!?!?!?
• The love saves everyone and everything line is so fucking cheesy I can’t.
My Overall Feelings:
• The book couldn’t choose a plot. Did it want to be a crime book? Did it want to be ACOMAF? Who the fuck knows.
• This would have worked better as a TV series than a book. Especially that scene where Bryce is trying to save the city and everyone is just watching it happen on the jumbo screen at the summit. In book form it was just….weird….and felt disruptive...and someone could've started flying to help out. Plus I like watching shows with characters like Bryce but hate reading books with characters like her if that makes sense...
• Also if the summit is just between the leaders of CC then why did Sadriel have to be there? Why does it happen only every 10 years? Why does it have to take place outside of the city if no other leaders from other places are present?
• Why don’t we get a map of all of the other countries that were mentioned?
• This book was wayyyyyy too long. It would have been much better if it was reduced to 500ish pages instead.
• Also the character’s flip-flopped with their character development way too much. It wasn’t consistent.
• This is definitely one of the better SJM book’s I’ve read, but it won’t be one that I’ll reread. It is too long with too many boring bits in the middle.
• But hey! If you love SJM then you’ll probably love this book…
Content Warnings and Trigger Warnings: restricted eating, self-harm, drug use, alcohol consumption, implied rape, mentions of abusive relationships, suicidal thoughts, depression, emesis, slavery, terrorist attacks, grief, gun violence, death, murder, violence, torture
View all my reviews
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kaedesfleawaltz · 3 years
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I’m suuuuuuper burnt out on Danganronpa sooooooooo, I hope you guys like my new content because it’s gonna be like that from now on.
I appreciate everyone sticking around and I’ll throw some DR stuff in the queue on occasion but yeah it’ll mostly be otome game stuff now with Genshin and Fire Emblem popping up often. So yeah here’s the announcement that I won’t be a DR blog and if you want to leave go ahead.
I do hope I’ve convinced at least one person to give some a try though before ya leave if you so choose. Since this was a DR-ish blog it’d probably CollarxMalice or Piofiore for the blood and mystery.
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kaedesfleawaltz · 4 years
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I guess since I’m here I’ll be suuuuuuuuuper nice and load up my queue for a few days~ Hope you like Fire Emblem~ 
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kaedesfleawaltz · 5 years
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💚👅💘👀!
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Thank youwu Wen~
Ship that you secretly like: 💚
-Hmmmmm I’m pretty open about most of my ships besides my big bad one. Maybeeeeeeeeee................. Idk Edgeworth and Sebastian is probably the closest one to being secret?? 
Ship that you find most sexy:👅
-Does any ship with Ryo count? It comes with the bondage artist territory. But Fem!Reikoga is very haaaaaaaaa
Ship that is unpopular but you still like: 💘
-Listen popularity won’t stop me ever. Of course there’s the big one Naehiro but EveAri, YumaRin, Maoshino there’s too many to list. 
Ship you’re curious about: 👀
-Maybe Reitsumu??? Mostly cuz I have no idea why it’s a thing
Controversial shipping asks
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kaedesfleawaltz · 5 years
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Oh wow my activity is still boppin’ on here
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kaedesfleawaltz · 5 years
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Oh btw if anyone is still here and cares I’m chihiro_exe on twitter so you can follow me there if ya wanna. You’re not gonna see much dr thou as I said in my ‘good bye’ post. I’m not into it as much plus a lot of the fandom bugs me so I just talk about it with my friends if I really want to.
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kaedesfleawaltz · 2 years
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Maybe I’ll just go on an unfollow spree since I’m not into dr much atm and try and use this blog again
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kaedesfleawaltz · 7 years
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I finally went and bought this last night because Lucahjin's AA let's plays put me back in a AA mood and it’s been really fun so far!
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kaedesfleawaltz · 6 years
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Here’s my super cute strap of Kaede I got from @shsl-box-split! I got it in the mail when I was out of town and when I came back I waited until my birthday to open it (then I got too tired to post about it) I love her so much and she’s absolutely adorable! Thank you for hosting the split!
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kaedesfleawaltz · 6 years
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I’M SUING ROOSTER TEETH FOR EMOTIONAL TRAUMA
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kaedesfleawaltz · 7 years
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Today is a good day to love and appreciate Ouma Kokichi
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