#Comrade in shenanigans and besties in crime

[remotelymarried-blog]

Seven types of men every single woman has in her life.

Most of us single ladies have had some inconceivable dating experiences and we have collected a few testosterone bearing comrades along the way and assigned them to a place in our existence.  Here is a compilation of the top seven types of men every single woman has in her life.    

7. The Head of Friend Zone.  He is Friend Zone CEO!  

A true friend indeed and a reliable shoe-in for conversation about subjects considered to be uninteresting to or inappropriate for men.  He may not be the best at “PMS words of wisdom” but he will gladly remind you of your “Queen bee” status, all while steadily trying to crawl his ass out of the friend zone…You better get back in there!

6. Dan from P.R. A.K.A Your Man Club VP.

Your “Ride or Die Guy” and advocate for every shameful and illicit life choice that you make.  He is also a crusader for everything you believe in.  Like a brother, but his water runs thicker than blood.  This is a friendship made in Nirvana that the engulfing fires of hell couldn’t melt.    

5. The Taken.  

This reminds me of that 2009 Crime Thriller “The Taken” but in this flick, that despicable and undeserving damsel steals your man.  That Louboutin wearing villain has the only redemption for mankind within a 100 mile radius wrapped around here ring finger.  Sometimes, we mistake him for the “bestie” or the “work husband” or “Dan from P.R.” but he’s actually the one who might get away.  You know the one – fine, smart, chivalrous, enterprising and… unavailable.  

4. The work husband.

Most of us have one but ALL of us should. For the actual husbands that are reading this - YES, your wifey might have an innocuous imitation spouse that gets her through the professional part of her day.  The “work husband” is intelligent, funny and stimulates her creative genius.  Although the relationship is strictly platonic, the bond is so fierce that it mimics the pledge of marriage.  

3. The Ex that won’t die.

Well, well, well.  What do we have here?  You had me.  You lost me. And now you want me back?  Boy bye!   No matter how times you try to kill this cucaracha, “The Ex that won’t die” gets up and walks away without a graze.  Then after minimal planning and ¼ of a f*** given, he delivers another strive to make you fall in love with him again.  Now, although his intentions might seem virtually sincere, we all know how this story ends. Badly.      

2. The “If he were cuter (or had a job), he would be my husband”.

Yeh, this one is self-explanatory.  

1.The T.N.S. Sorcerer.  

You’ve heard of ONS, well he’s the TNS or the “Three-Night Stand Sorcerer”.  He comes with an expiration date and an invoice. He’s usually cheap as hell, always mendacious and evading general questions like “why didn’t you answer my messages?” Or  "Who is that girl on your social media page?“.   All of his desperate shenanigans to conceal his intrinsic insecurities, fear of commitment and his real relationship status.  He frequently takes a MIA furlough and routinely returns into your inbox with acute amnesia.  His sexual mastery may be up for debate but the T.N.S Sorcerer has one clear objective- Pop-up. Get in, Get out. Vanish and repeat. #Wastehertime2017  

Ladies, how many of these men do you have in your life?  Men, which one are you?

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-Re

#dating #love #dating over 40 #remotelymarried #relationships