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savelonkar · 1 year

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CHERRIE NEVER HAD CANCER

Jesus said the truth will set you free. It’s time for me to speak my truth. I’m hoping one day it will set me free. All I want is peace in this life: peace of mind, peace in interactions, peace in relationships. Unfortunately, all my ex wants is war.

You see, we were together for 20 years. We built a life together and raised six kids. It was never easy. Did we struggle from time to time? Certainly, as would any couple. But in 2016, it all went downhill from there. That was the year she conjured up the fake cancer. Yup, you read that right.

CHERRIE NEVER HAD CANCER

Around the time Cherrie turned 35, I was already 41-ish, and had personally started going to the doctor to get the routine checkups you would as an aging individual. Cherrie had never really done the same, so I suggested she see the breast doctor since she was 35 and all. The first time she went for a check-up, or boob-smashing, she informed the breast doctor that her father had cancer years ago. The next appointment, I went along with Cherrie. At the time, I was working full-time, as I was always the sole provider, and I was teaching and working through my email during the appointment. After all, this was just a checkup, right? During the appointment, the doctor asked if anyone else in Cherrie’s family had gotten cancer as of late, and it just so happened that her aunt Carol, her mother’s sister, had breast cancer pretty recently. When the doctor heard that, she left the room for a few minutes, then came back. When she returned, she told Cherrie she would now need a double mastectomy. I admit I was half-listening when she said that. I was shocked, and like, “Can we get a second opinion?” The doctor explained that this was a preventative measure, based on an algorithm, and insurance companies started approving of this procedure, as it saves them money in the long run. Angelina Jolie was one that many will remember having done this same thing. When we went home, I started looking up other alternatives. I told Cherrie she should see another doctor, get another opinion, look at other options. Why did she have to do ANYTHING? There is NO CANCER. Plus, we were up to six kids at that time. Our littlest guy was just nine months old, and breastfeeding. Cherrie talked to family and friends, and then went full-tilt on doing the double mastectomy. She started a Facebook “tribe” to catalog her story, she started “Cherrie’s tribe” on Facebook, and started gathering followers, to follow her pseudo cancer story.

She died her hair purple, an FU to the pink that represents breast cancer. She got others to wear purple to support. A few weeks later, in February, she gathered myself and a few friends, and she was singing and dancing and rapping all the way to the operating room. She fist-pumped to the Australian Sia/David Guetta’s Titanium. I really did not have much time to process all of this. With everything that was happening, we also had six kids, ranging from less than a year, all the way to eight years of age. All I really understood was that Cherrie was steadfast through this whole thing.

Three or four hours into Cherrie’s double mastectomy, Dr. K, the breast surgeon, came out and found me. I was grading a bunch of classes to pass the time. “Good news!” “We did not find any cancer.” “I know,” I said to myself, relieved but then again, there was NEVER any signs of CANCER. Check this actual post from her good friend that was at the hospital at that time:

UPDATE: first portion of the surgery (the bi-lateral mastectomy) is complete and "went off without a hitch" and everything looked good. The breast surgeon is “fairly certain pathology on the breast tissue will come back benign". Since Cherrie had no active cancer and the suspicious lymph node appears to have been only an infection as it shrunk back to normal size (cancerous lymph nodes do not do that without help) there is a 1-3% chance of anything showing up. Pathology results will be back Monday. They did not do a node biopsy or sentinel node biopsy as the node is normal, it is just standard procedure to send the breast tissue to pathology. The plastic surgeon is doing her portion now (placing the expanders) and should be done in the next 2 hours.

Read that again. That was the truth.

Four hours later, Cherrie was boob-free. For the greater part of the next two years, as Cherrie lie there healing and posting about her story on the “tribe” page, the majority of the days and nights at home, I became the kids’ father and mother all wrapped up in one. Our littlest child was not even a year old when she had the big surgery, so he had to stop breastfeeding, and he could not even go onto his mommy’s lap (due to all the surgeries and incisions) for a couple of months. Every few months, her body would not react well to its healing, there’d be an infection, the list goes on, and she would have to go in for more surgeries (first to heal something that was not healing correctly, and eventually for reconstruction). When the same breast surgeon went in there at the end of April, they called it a bilateral necrosis and unilateral infection. Dead tissue was removed, and the infection was cleaned.

Fast forward to today, I combed through Cherrie’s Tribe page, because I really wasn’t sure where the fake cancer story started, when she went from saying there was no cancer, to saying she was a cancer survivor. But I can bet that Cherrie knew where this story was going even before she got to the hospital for that first surgery. It was primed and fluffed to be a well-scripted string of half-truths and lies.

You see, Cherrie has this weird thing. She takes bits and pieces of other peoples’ stories, or she crafts her own stories to garner attention or favor or money, and then she morphs them into what she says is her own story. You know that lady that made up crap about her daughter Gypsy Rose? Well, Cherrie makes up crap about her own conditions and diagnoses. I would not figure all of this out until after we had split, years later.

Let me give you an example. Over the years, Cherrie said she had 11 miscarriages. That’s right, she said she had 11 miscarriages with me. More often than not, I would get a call while at work, and she would tell me she “lost the baby.” I grieved hard every fricking time. There was only one time I remember going to the doctor, during one of our “pregnancies,” and then they told us that we no longer had a baby. There was one time, we had to do a D&C (Dilation and Curettage), and that really happened. But all the others, like the other 9? Who knows if they ever happened. You know, Cherrie was engaged to a guy that was already married, before I was in the picture, back in 2000-2001. He had an apartment with Cherrie, while his wife and their babies lived in a neighboring suburb. To throw the scent off, Cherrie’s then “fiancé” informed his actual wife that he just had a crashpad w/Cherrie, as they were flight attendants together. He also said that Cherrie contracted HIV at a very young age due to all the blood transfusions she had as a child. The actual wife grew suspicious, as her husband had many late night/early morning phone calls with Cherrie. There was one phone call she overheard, when her husband was speaking to Cherrie, he said, “Everything is gonna be alright, as long as I continue to get sympathy from my wife.” Back in 2001, Cherrie went with her mother and her “fiancé” and bought an engagement ring/wedding band set. The rings cost her mother $5500. The "fiance" that was already married, to his college sweetheart. His actual wife had a baby in 2000, they had another baby in 2002. Cherrie and her "fiancé" were together in 2001. Cherrie told me that she got pregnant with his baby, too, and then lost it. Who knows if that ever happened.

Back to the “cancer.”

Here’s the thing, she NEVER HAD CANCER. It was all a lie. She started fabricating the “cancer story” immediately after she came home from her double mastectomy. Like IMMEDIATELY, like the day or two after she was able to come home. March 1st, 2016, to be exact. She became my ghost writer, and put a bunch of loving husband posts and fictitious information about her surgery and her recovery. She did this for two entire years! When you look through the Cherrie’s Tribe page on Facebook, I’ll bet like 1-2% of the posts “by me” were actually written by me. In fact, when Cherrie was in the hospital (the first time, February 2016), she asked for my Facebook login and password. This was all a setup, one that helped her gain followers to follow her FAKE CANCER story. While she was healing, she was on lots of drugs, pain meds and such. She sat their like a vegetable many days, sat their in a very nice big electronic lounge chair that one of her friends purchased with their bingo or knitting club money. We had a Meal Train on and off for like two years, and since we did not have any relatives here in Arizona, sometimes relatives would come to visit. “What can I do to help?” they all asked me. I told them that I would take care of all the six kids, and their best efforts were to stay by Cherrie’s side, make sure she is taking her pain meds, and be there for her. By the time I would get to bed, I would be absolutely beat, from working all day, and running around like a chicken with my head cut off, trying to create some normalcy with the daily routine for our kids in an abnormal situation. Once Cherrie was “healed,” she started taking girlfriend trips immediately, to celebrate her “beating cancer.” It was all a lie, one that she used to broadcast a fake condition, and one that helped her grow socially to grandiose proportions. After all, who wouldn’t love a super mom with six kids that fought and beat cancer? Cherrie then told me that, given her “near death” experience, that she changed and I didn’t. When did I have time to “change?” She never had cancer, and I had to run my ass off and play along with her fakedom, taking care of six kids while working a full-time job, going to college, and teaching classes at the university.

Cherrie then used her newfound notoriety to start what is now her thriving business, that serves the special needs and foster/adopt population. The thing is, she NEVER HAD CANCER. Yet that one truth, or in her case, that one LIE, is what she built a million dollar business on.

Seriously, do you have any relatives that fake things like cancer? I have a cousin that once brought a baby that was not hers to a Christmas gathering, and I thought that was the lowest thing ever. But to fake CANCER? One more thing I have to say about that. In 2016, one of my closest colleagues Dave got diagnosed with cancer, and slowly deteriorated over the next two years till he died from his disease. When he was finished with chemo, as his body could not take anymore, he gave his bell that he got at his final chemo treatment to me, to give to Cherrie. He thought it might help her gather strength to beat it. I didn’t have the heart to tell him the truth, as my life was busy covering up this gargantuan lie. So, I brought it home and gave her this gift. Shortly after my dear friend Dave died, I asked Cherrie if I could give the bell back to Dave’s widow. Her response was, “Well, it WAS a GIFT to ME.” And she wasn’t having it. To this day, you will find Dave’s bell sitting like an unearned trophy in her bedroom, for all to see.

CHERRIE NEVER HAD CANCER.

The late Archbishop Desmond Tutu once said, “There is justice, and there is injustice. There is no in-between.” The last few years, I have experienced many injustices. I have cried more in the past two years than I ever have in my entire life. Life is not meant to be this hard. My life is supposed to be MY LIFE. It’s time to start shouting the truth from the rooftops. She’s the Facebook life. I’m the real life.

I’ve already lost almost two years here with my kids. Every time I think my life cannot get any worse, it does. When will this pain and heartache end? When will I be able to see my kids, back to the 50/50 it stated in our divorce decree from two years ago?

From September through December, Cherrie had other people in her life drop our kids off at the “transfer.” She “showed up” for the first time in 4 months to “transfer” our kids at the police station on Christmas Eve. She called the cops. They wished me a Merry Christmas, then asked her to leave. I took five of my kids to Phoenix to feed the homeless in their camps at 10th/12th and Roosevelt. Now, for my 48th birthday, I must go get fingerprinted, because she is saying I violated some order or process. We’ve been divorced for almost two years now. All I want is peace. All she wants is war. You would think after spending 20 years together, there would be some level of human decency. It’ll make a great book/documentary/movie, I guess. Merry Christmas and Happy Bday to me.

CHERRIE NEVER HAD CANCER.

If you'd like to find out more, keep an eye on this blog. I also have a GoFundMe. Do not feel obligated to fund me, but do feel obligated to support me, in mind and spirit, as I am in the fight for my life and for my rights as a father. I welcome your support.

#army veteran #parentalalienation #fathersmatter #fathersrights #truthmatters #munchausen #munchausenbyproxy

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