#AUGHHHH IT HURTS. it hurts my heart so bad | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

niuniente · 4 years

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GOD that entrapdak post is so on point!!! I hate that there's this standard that 'catra's choices were ok bc she's a lesbian so hooray!!! But all of Hordak's decisions were awful and he's awful and I guess it's ok he got a happy ending' aughhhh

EXACTLY. It is also genuinely a dangerous thing if people are put on a special, almost divine pedestal, with unconditional understanding while erasing all their humanity only because of their sexuality. It is dangerous to think that people are pure only based on their sexuality (or gender) same way as it’s dangerous to think people are evil based on these same things. This leaves, especially young ones, open for undetected abuse from minority group individuals. It’s really, really bad if we go, let’s say “This is a hetero man. He is always evil and is incapable of loving” VS “This is a gay man. He is always pure and fair and is incapable of hurting anyone”.

They are human. We all are human. We are flawed beings with our own weaknesses and burdens. If things go to a spot where we can’t call out someone for their bullshit and toxic behavior because of their gender, sexuality, age, race, nationality, status, religion etc. were are screwed and screw the upcoming generations, too. This “these groups are pure”-mentality can lead to situations where an individual takes and tolerated toxic shit from their partner/friend/family member/loved one/etc. without even daring to set boundaries and defend themselves because “but he/she/they is Z, all Zs are good/pure/misunderstood/hurt/need help/unloved so if he/she/they behave badly, it is somehow my fault and they are just hurting and I have to keep helping and understanding them even when it hurts me and breaks me”.

Always value and determine how the person is based on the whole individual, not only by their external factors. If someone is a man, he is not automatically abusing evil being. If someone is poly, they are not automatically a positive open minded individual. Don’t hesitate to step away from toxic people and call them out for their bullshit no matter who they are (there are good examples in She-Ra)

Then there are personal factors in a way that we vibe with some people and with some we don’t. That doesn’t automatically make the other person bad just because we don’t get them or they don’t get us. Automatic assumptions and labeling are dangerous, harmful and toxic.

Being minority of any type is not a frigging free pass to be shit freely towards others.

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Back to what Noelle says, there’s contradiction: She first says that Entrapta taught Hordak love and they are happy together. Then she says that Hordak would hurt (and kill) Entrapta despite of this love. Hmmm, I think that, unfortunately, fits Catra more with her guest to have a revenge on Adora she loves from the bottom of her heart and is OK with killing her and the whole planet.

IF I RECALL RIGHT Molly and Noelle spoke about Entrapdak and they say that something like “We are lesbians, we don’t get this.” It’s very unfortunate to hear, even as a joke (because jokes often hide truth) as you don’t have to represent certain sexuality in order to understand what healthy and loving relationship is all about. SERIOUSLY YOU DON’T. No matter what your sexual orientation is, the healthy good relationship is based on the same things; mutual respect, mutual honoring, mutual love and care, mutual trust, mutual working together for the relationship, mutual humor and mutual desire to be together. This has nothing to do with what do you want to do in the bedroom (if anything) and who do you want to love and with who or with how many individuals you want to proceed towards with these things.

I’m not a poly myself, but an old fashioned demi monogamy person but the hell, of course I can understand what poly-amorous healthy relationship is based on! Of course I can understand how it’s important to someone who is poly and makes them happy even when I don’t feel any appeal to it nor I want to live in such a relationship myself. I have poly characters in my comics! It’s really not that hard.

Not everything needs to appeal to you in order for you to understand - or try to understand - and support it and those to whom it is very important.

#sory for the speech I seemed to have lots things to say #hordak #entrapta #spop #ask niu #Anonymous

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tfw-no-tennis · 3 years

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mtmte liveblog issue 16

here we go, the crux of the pain...

ok I'm not prepared for this but I gotta rip the bandaid off, lets go

oh!!! magnus flashbacks!! I honestly thought these were shown later...this is such cool setup for the next arc tho I love it

and the tieback to the scavengers ark, showing fulcrum’s flashback but from magnus’s perspective, as the guy labelled with ‘ultra magnus’ blows him up...

and like, I love that those flashbacks are so vague, and you don't even really know why you're being shown them - I feel like when I first read this I assumed it was to show a bunch of times where magnus almost died but didn't even though he was expected to die - like here w/overlord - but we’ll soon find out that's not quite the case...

and I like the little details that don't add up, like the second flashback-magnus having his autobrand at an angle (which current-magnus would obviously hate), and the ‘witty banter’ remark about 3rd flashback-magnus, which could very well be genuine

oh god oh christ the shot of the lost light flying away from the wreckage of the pod and you can see rewinds broken camera just floating there...fuckgin kill me bro

tg wiping off mangus’s leg because ‘he hates dirt’ tailgate ;_; ily

drift just chillin with 0 legs left

augh poor tailgate, he’s uniquely unprepared for the horrors of battle after sitting out the whole war

oh god, chromedome is standing on the outside of the ship being sad, I already cant handle this

ohhhh god cd talking about him and rewind looking at the stars together ;_; excuse me while I cry my eyes out

chromedome, you have the worst goddamn coping mechanisms

never over rodimus’s office having flames around the door. my guy

magnus invented a font? that makes so much sense somehow

rodimus is worried about his dad :(

damnnnnn rung with that absolutely BRUTAL read on rodimus, oof. way to kick someone when they're down...ouch

but really, rodimus’s hero complex is so fascinating, especially bc he’s aware that he has it to some degree, and he’s not necessarily a bad person, so he tries somewhat to avoid playing into it, but that's a difficult thing to do...

brainstorm hugging his briefcase like that at the funeral...hhhh

swerve, the ‘case quest’ sounds like a spectacularly bad idea

god I'm so sad this whole issue but rodimus giving this big impassioned funeral speech that seems like its about rewind, only for it to REALLY be about some guy who turns into a tripod....really funny

godddd chromedome and brainstorm sitting together, and cd staring at his (remaining) hand....bro :(((

super interested in the fact that rodimus is religious, even though he’s not really overt about it, and it’s not touched on much in the story

rung staring intensely and accusingly at rodimus....jesus that's intimidating

chromedome is clearly uh. Not Coping well, which anyone could see after his “speech” about rewind

brainstorm giving cd that Look :( oh man oh god

GODDDDDDDD the reveal that chromedome has been through this THREE TIMES before, and every single time has chosen to forget, and the whole thing w/the innermost energon...im fucking devastated m8. god

hhhhh and brainstorm saying that he knows cd will go through with it, because they've had this same conversation multiple times before...fucking kill me

also brainstorm and cd’s friendship is so AUGHHHHH my heart man. earlier on they're friendly assholes to each other but now we get to see that they both have a lot of deep emotions

oh god and now the whole thing with drift. hhhhhh this issue HURTS man

thinkin abt how brainstorm, while talking to cd, said that he thinks that drift ‘has the urge to name names’ but really, drift threw himself on the sword and took ALL the blame, even though cd even said, a lot of it was on him for going into the cell without telling anyone...plus brainstorm (and as we later find out, rodimus) is involved as well....AUGH

and drift being cast out so harshly seems rough, even though we know what he (and the others) did was bad

also looks like magnus is reanimating himself over in the medbay...i love all the symbolism with magnus’s hand this issue

OH GOD OH NO I CANT HANDLE THIS. REWINDS GOODBYE MESSAGE IS SERIOUSLY THE BIGGEST TEARJERKER IN THE STORY

‘you and me apart strikes me as intensely wrong’ I'm literally weeping. hello. I cant fucking handle this

NOOOO GODDDD I seriously cant deal with rewinds message overlaid onto drift leaving the ship, and being attacked as he goes, and then ratchet helping him up with ‘you're a better person now - stubborn and frustrating but wonderful!’ over the panels AUGHHHH my heart cant handle any of this. my organs are shutting down as we speak

god I'm just ugly crying @ the end of the message.... ‘one more thing - one last thing - because I don't say it enough...I love you’ AUGHHHH

and its rewind himself who says the ‘I love you’ ;_; LOOK HOW HARD I CAN CRY!!!!!!!!!!!

and the panels of chromedome retracting his needles...he was ready to go through w/it just like brainstorm said but rewind was able to convince him otherwise from beyond the grave ;_; its about the LOVE man

like...rewind might not have known about cd’s past husbands and all the bad coping mechanism nonsense surrounding all that (or maybe he did? unclear) but either way, he knows chromedome so well by now, and knows that he’d be devastated by rewind dying, and so he leaves him this final message....additionally, I feel like rewind, being an archivist, would loathe the idea of being erased from the memory of the person who cares for him the most, and his goodbye message succeeded in preventing that

next, to give us a break from extreme emotional devastation brought about by gay robots, we check in with magnus, who has decided he’s had enough of all of this nonsense and has vacated the premise, somehow

aaaaand right back to being hit by a metaphorical emotional bat, because it looks like tailgate’s gonna die posthaste!

I really love how the character profile descriptions change periodically

SO...this issue...this ARC....GODDDD. I mean its clear from my liveblogs that this destroyed me emotionally, phew....

I will say, I think the writing here is so excellent - this little 3-issue ‘arc’ felt like it had been built up to perfectly from the very beginning, and it all came together in a well-paced and devastating conclusion here

I mean, this isn't the end of s1, we still have remain in light, but a lot of plot points wrapped up here. I don't know much about comics but I feel like they can get cancelled pretty fast, and idek how many issues mtmte was ‘guaranteed’ at this point, so I really commend jro & co for being able to construct such a fantastic story with a solid conclusion, while also setting up a bunch more plotlines for what would hopefully be future issues

I will say. I'm super glad rewind ends up coming back, and also that things get a lot gayer soon, bc this would have been devastating to read in a whole different way if it was just a bad ole str8forward bury your gays situation

but since it isn't, then I'm free to be extremely emotional about it, oof

I feel like I've articulate a lot of my thoughts already so ill end here and say: this slaps, cant wait to re-read more

#ive read this series thru twice but it still Gets Me man #lj rereads mtmte

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miraivan · 6 years

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Star Wars: The Last Jedi

I saw the new Star Wars movie, and I have a lot of Thoughts that it seems most people who have seen it haven’t had. So here there are in a VERY SPOILERY format under the cut. Please do not click if you haven’t seen the movie. Mostly I am just sad.

This is gonna be ramble. Just got back from the new Star Wars movie, and I'm still digesting it in my head, but I wanted to put my thoughts down because overall I think I came out of this movie really unhappy with it, and I want preserve my thoughts before I start reading other reviews or whatever. I didn't hate everything, but overall I left feeling unhappy. So, in no particular order:

Too many characters doing too many stupid/unimportant things. Lots of plots kind of everywhere, a lot of which just weren't interesting/felt tedious. Number 1 was the casino detour which was so stupid it hurts, and it amounted to nothing but a big waste of time. It gave Finn something to do, I guess, but it was really dumb. Maybe the betraying dude will come back at some point, but mostly that whole sequence left me twitching in my seat.

The whole movie felt like one of those movies where shit keeps happening just to fuck the situation up a little more so they have to keep running? It's a common theme in some movies and I absolutely hate it. The exit is clear and then suddenly EVENT happens and the exit is moved back five paces, then it happens again and again and again. It's a cheap and unrealistic way of building suspense, and gets absurd when you push it to the scale this movie did with people running from a planet to space ships, to smaller space ships, to another planet, to a door, to a tunnel, etc. It's just exhausting and tedious. It's not exciting, it's frustrating. And the longer everyone important to the plot lives through events like these, the less and less meaningful they are. Not that I want important people to die, but if they don't then there are literally no stakes. I don't care (much) about the secondary/background characters. Obviously I don't want the Rebels to all die, but when 20 ships are being picked off one-by-one and 19 of the ships have faceless background characters on them and one has all the main cast... there's just no fear. It's just tedium to get to the next sequence because I know everyone in the main cast is not about to be blown up.

Kylo Ren is such a fucking baby whiny manchild brat asshole dick. I DO NOT UNDERSTAND THIS CHARACTER. I do not understand his motivations or why anyone likes him. His actor's choices for the role are also often mindboggling. There were a few moments where he had some personality and interesting traits, but overall I just don't understand him. I cannot comprehend what went so terribly bad in his pampered little baby boy life that he got so seduced to the dark side by Snoke that he's totally down with killing his family, and also all these millions of Rebels. I just don't get it. I don't get why he hates Luke with such a fiery passion, either. Hating Luke I get, but the whole scene where he says FIRE EVERYTHING ON THAT MAN.... why? Why do you hate Luke so much? There's one scene where Luke maybe tried to kill him, and I get that was traumatizing for him. But, where did the fiery rage come from? I can make excuses for it, like Snoke convinced him Luke was some crazy asshole, or whatever. But it just doesn't make sense. That's just me making excuses for the movie's bad writing. There's no good explanation for why Kylo was so seduced so thoroughly. When you compare his upbringing to Anakin's, it's like a joke. Anakin makes sense why he went to the Dark Side. We got a real understanding of his descent into the Dark Side and how he was seduced, and how he thought it was his only out/the only way he could protect people he loved/etc. There's none of that with Kylo. Basically the only explanation is that he's a psychopath, and like... that could be okay? Some people are psychopaths. Hux is probably one. But I don't think that's the interpretation we're meant to have for him. We're meant to think he's got light remaining and that he's redeemable, I just don't see how.

As he is he's just an utterly unlikable, nonredeemable character. Because he has no logical motivation for his petulant behavior, he's unsympathetic and since he's unsympathetic I can't root for his redemption. Even if he was turned to the light side, he'd still need to die for all the shit he's done. There's just no coming back from that. He's not a villain with shades of grey to him, he's just all black and that makes him really uninteresting to me.

Did they really need to kill off Luke like that? What an anticlimactic and unnecessary death. The stuff before it was interesting/cool, and the whole projection thing was very neat. I get why it would've exhausted him so much... but so much to the point of death... ehhhh. That seemed unnecessary. I suspect he'll be around as a Force ghost, but. Meh. It was very underwhelming after what was otherwise a cool fight sequence.

I'll never understand why they don't land their ships and things closer to their destination. Like the huge cannon thing, why not land it within immediate firing range? Why land 5 miles away?

Didn't need Rose randomly kissing Finn. Not sure where that was coming from? Was it just to try to drive a wedge into the Finn/Rey romance/relationship that seems way more natural and obvious? If it amounts to nothing then I guess whatever. She's a fangirl and was dying so whatever. But if it turns into a romance I'm gonna be seriously side-eyeing everything.

Overall there was too much happening and not enough down time. When I think about this compared to Empire Strikes Back, there's just no heart to it the way Empire had. This just has too many characters and kept trying to follow them all. They needed to focus on just Rey and Finn, with everyone else pivoting around them as secondary characters. Their reunion should've felt like Leia rescuing Han in RotJ. But instead we're following Poe (who is relevantly unimportant, I'm sorry, he just is) for huge parts of it, and what he's doing is largely uninteresting/tedious/boring because he's fighting in battles we are almost positive he won't die in, and causing trouble that we almost certainly know won't affect the major plot of the show. In fact, I'm almost positive if you removed most of Poe's solo scenes the movie would progress just fine on its own.

And instead of giving Finn something useful to do, they just sent him off on some illogical chase to some other planet to fuck around for a few hours? What? Why not just send everyone with him? Why not at least send as many people as could possibly fit onto that ship to get them to safety? Why not try to do more trips like that to other nearby planets? If they could get to that casino world so easily in that ship why was it taking so long to get the other ships to that old rebel base planet? Also, why didn't they fly the freighter into the Star Destroyer way earlier? Why was that not even a consideration? Why just let the Admiral die pointlessly when they could've planned from the start that after abandoning ship she'd fly it straight into the Star Destroyer? Why couldn't THAT have been the plan she was saving all along to tell Poe? And not wanting to tell him because he'd be angry about it, but it would've proven that she really was a capable, desperate war general and would've made a lot more sense that just having her sitting in her chair piloting (WHY IS SHE EVEN PILOTING??) the ship. How does that thing not have auto pilot? Aughhhh, that was all so stupid.

I don't know why everyone is frothy about the porgs. They were kind of cute when the first showed up, but got real old real fast. Overused. The salt dogs were much more interesting and way less gimmicky feeling.

We should've seen more of Leia's Force abilities prior to her flying through space. Don't get me wrong, that was awesome, but I wanted to see more build up prior to that, or at least a few words somewhere that she'd had some Jedi training.

I did like how Snoke was the one orchestrating the link between Rey and Kylo, but I think it's absolutely moronic that Rey didn't tell Luke that she was having these visions/connections. How did she not think that was a *little* important? I would've also liked to have seen more actual Jedi training for her. Lifting the X-Wing out of the water, running with Luke tied to her back, actually sparring with the lightsaber instead of just swinging it at a rock. I was so excited for her to meet Luke and train from him, but I feel like almost all of their time together was wasted. She wouldn't open up to him, and he wouldn't open up to her, and the training she got was sort of half-assed/stories. Some interesting moments, but just nothing really deep. (I also still think it's really dumb that the rebellion was depending SO MUCH on finding Luke that they based the whole first movie around finding the map to him, but once they finally found a way to him... they sent one random girl they'd just met. And Chewie. Why didn't they at least send a couple of people? Or at least someone Luke knew?)

Speaking of the previous movie, we got several scenes there that gave the impression that Rey was originally trained as a Jedi and witnessed Kylo's attack on the others. Didn't we? I distinctly remember a scene of her as a small child watching as a shadowy figure with a lightsaber attacked and her being abandoned on Jakku by her family. And I remember her reaction and visions when she touched Luke's lightsaber the first time. I'm TOTALLY FINE with her parents being nobodies (if that's even the truth), but it doesn't explain those visions. I'm totally fine with her naturally being awesome with the Force and I like the idea that as Kylo grew stronger in the Dark Side someone would grow equally strong in the Light Side, but I still feel like Rey needs more explanation for why she can do the things she can do. Maybe that'll be in the third movie, but I suspect we're just supposed to believe she naturally knows how to influence minds, sword fight and lift rocks, and I don't quite buy that.

I'm trying to think of more things I liked. Seeing Leia was wonderful. She's a hardcore badass, but of course it was tinged with a lot of sadness. I wanted a much better reunion between Luke and Leia and it's sad to know that even if she were alive we wouldn't get it because they decided to kill off Luke. I'm not opposed to Luke dying, but it didn't serve a really big purpose. Just bought them a bit of time to escape from a retarded situation they put themselves into... Wait, sorry I'm complaining again.

Ugh, I dunno. Everything I'm thinking about is annoying me. Yoda's scene was weird. Can he just show up whenever? Why then? Why not during a more important moment? The way he talked made it seem like he hadn't seen Luke in a long time, but showing up then just seemed random since he didn't stop Luke from destroying the Jedi books.

A whole host of native nuns living on that tiny island was kind of weird/unnecessary.

Ugh, I dunno. Overall I just wanted a more streamlined story, following the main character, where shit *actually happens*. Other than Kylo killing Snoke, almost nothing happened in this movie. The rebels moved from one location to another taking ridiculously huge casualities and killing some Imperials too, and that's about it. I think the whole movie took less than a week. (Gotta love their magical time travel.)

The visuals were stunning, and it was great to see some characters interacting again, but a much better story would have involved the rebels escaping to a small base, having some quiet down time with just our main cast all together (Rey, Finn and Leia, maybe Poe), and following them as they went as a group together to confront Kylo (or vice versa). Spreading everyone out in varying storylines did no service to the story, and weakened it a lot in Finn and Poe's case because their stories weren't interesting. Rey's was the only interesting storyline and should've been the main/central one, but it felt quite sidelined at times.

The Force Awakens wasn't perfect, but it definitely felt better written, with much better pacing and characterizations than whatever this was. I felt like this was just really jagged and poorly put together, with lots of superfluous/time filling scenes, many of which went on for way too long. I constantly felt bored, thinking, "Get back to the main plot!" while I'm watching yet another pointless space battle.

I'm really sad/diappointed. I love Star Wars. I was so pumped and ready for this movie, and I just don't think I liked it. I can't see myself settling into excitedly rewatch this the way I could other Star Wars movies. There's just no heart in this one for me. It's almost all empty action.

Ugh. Convince me I'm wrong.

#star wars #star wars review #the last jedi #star wars: the last jedi #review #the last jedi review

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