#AND COMFORTING HIM AND SAVING HIM 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺😭😭😭🤧🤧🤧 KI DESERVES THE WORLD 🥺🥺🥺🥺😭😭😭😤🤧 | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

killuaisaprincess · 1 year

Text

Silent Princess

⳾*⑅*❀⑅*❀⑅*❀⑅*❀⑅*❀⑅*⳾

No. The taste of acid burns in his throat, bitter. His stomach sits so upset, he almost throws up, forced to keep a calm, royal demeanor. No. No. It’s not fair. It’s… tears sting burning his eyes as he blinks them away.

He just wants to help…

XxX

“Killua. Enough!”

His father never used that tone on him. He was often cold and harsh, but…

He can’t help but flinch in retaliation. Digging his nails into the royal blue sleeves of his gown.

“This can help!”

This technology! He knows it can! It’s so much better than dumb magical powers. A bitter thought.

“You cannot keep shirking your responsibilities! You are the only one who can seal Meruem!“

Shirking? Him? He knows more than anyone…! What he has to do…! The frustration builds in his chest, the tears that well up in his eyes. The uselessness he feels everyday! So he wants to do something to help! He enjoys studying. He’s trying! No one sees it! He tries! He prays and prays! He does anything he can, reading up, attempting, and attempting!

It all fails! Every attempt is like a dagger in his heart.

“I forbid you from studying those machines any longer until you awaken your power, understand?”

Those words draw the air right from his lungs as he looks up into his father’s cold eyes, his frame trembling.

Why…?

Why!

XxX

That sword… plunges into his heart more than anything. His frame is taut, breathing panicked, and caught in his throat.

“Killua.”

That calm voice is the only thing that can ever anchor him. Press down his anxieties and make him feel better for just a moment.

Killua looks up into those crimson eyes and feels a sense of relief. Kurapika is like a big brother to him. He’s strong, cool-headed, and amazing. Everything he wants to be.

What’s the point of this useless power if he can’t use it?!

“Pika… it’s… it’s not working! I keep trying! Why am I so useless…? Why won’t it awaken for me?!”

Is he that terrible? Why? Why? Why?

When he stands there. His destiny accepting him with open arms so easily…

And here he is… useless!

“Give it time, little bird; everyone learns at their own pace.”

Kurapika doesn’t smile often, but when he does, it eases the trembling in his shoulders a little, as the Kurta places a hand on his shoulder.

Right. Time.

Prickle. Prickle. The feeling runs against his skin. Bitter. Bitter.

He hates him.

XxX

Killua hates him. He hates him. Why…? Why is it the gods will ignore him… when he’s tried! And tried… there are still black circles under his eyes, as his skin burns in fury, and sadness and despair threatens to drown him. His personal knight? No! No, he doesn’t want this idiot to be his personal knight!

What? He can just pick up the legendary sword like it’s no problem! Like it’s easy?! And everyone praises him and looks at him with smiles…

And he…

His father…

The whole world…

XxX

Bitter. Bitter. Prickle. Prickle.

He has to keep calm when knighting the knight.

Gon.

When the knight takes his hand kneeling, he stiffens and flinches unwittingly, sucking in a breath.

The knight looks up with these bright amber eyes filled with so much life, and a pure shock of anger and pain runs down his spine as he swallows.

“It’s an honor, your highness. To protect you.”

Smiling at him like that… Killua catches a glimpse of the hilt of that sword, and it makes his head spin.

��Yes. It is a pleasure.”

He speaks as coldly as his father speaks to him.

XxX

“Stop following me!”

Brat. Selfish. He knows what they all think. Useless. Failure. Heir to a throne of nothing. Failure. Failure.

So what if he’s a brat?!

They don’t know…!

He’s prayed everyday his whole life!

“But, your highness!”

He doesn’t get this idiot; how can he still follow him! When Killua has been nothing but cold to him everyday.

Maybe he’s hoping… if he’s cold enough, the knight will leave him alone, and he won’t have to see that sword on his back that reminds him of all his failures!

Gon. He’s so full of light, and love, and energy, and-

Killua can’t stand it!

He huffs, stomping off, past Gon.

“I do not care what my father orders! Leave me alone!”

He just wants to study in peace!

“But, your highness!”

He can’t take this anymore! Another failure! Another look of disappointment from everyone he knows!

“Enough!”

He whirls around, anger flashing in his deep blue eyes, the edge of his boot catching on a rock. The pain that runs through his legs and behind are nothing compared to the shame that pools in his chest and spreads across his cheeks.

Don’t cry. Don’t cry. Don’t cry.

Gon stares at him dumbfounded before jolting out of it, rushing over, and leaning next to him.

“Your highness? Are you alright?”

He sounds so genuinely concerned that Killua doesn’t know what to feel. A few tears land on his cheeks, and he doesn’t even try to brush them away, letting light wisps of his hair fall into his eyes.

A broken-hearted sob leaves his lips.

He can hear Gon audibly gasp, but he doesn’t care anymore. There is no more shame he can hold. He’s a useless heir with no foreseeable future because he can’t awaken it…

“Your highness-!”

He feels the rough warmth of Gon’s hand grab his own, and Killua tears it away, sniffling and looking toward the ground.

“Leave me alone.”

XxX

He was always envious of Gon. He thought he didn’t face any hardships at all.

He was wrong.

He wants to do something for Gon to apologize. More than just the words.

Killua doesn’t know why… when he thinks about him now… his heart won’t stop pounding…

Maybe he’ll make him something.

Gon was always hungry, always scarfing something down with Ikalgo…

XxX

His legs burn. Sweat clings everywhere, making the fibers of his blouse stick to his skin as he runs. His feet ache, and his lungs hurt too much. He can’t get another gasp of air in.

The fear is palpating.

He’s an idiot! He knew this was the territory of the Chimera, still he!

He just wants to be of use!

But now…

“Leave me alone!”

He had already told Gon…

What point would Gon have now…

He’s just been cold and harsh to him…

There’s an opening, and he keeps running even when his legs feel like collapsing. Killua skids to a stop, a harsh gasp leaving his lips as more of the Chimera circle around.

N-no!

He falls backward, the world around him spinning, his heartbeat roaring in his ears.

No. He’s- he’s going to die.

Before he can even-

One of them steps forward, snickering, and he scoots back, his breathing irregular and panicked.

It swings.

Killua closes his eyes, waiting for the inevitable, bringing his arms up to shield his face.

“Ah-!”

It doesn’t come. No agonizing pain to end his failure of an existence.

“Your highness!”

Killua opens his eyes slowly, lowering his arms just slightly so they rest at his chest, curled up there, trying to protect himself.

“G-Gon…?”

Why- why is Gon here… when…?

W-why…

Why…

He looks up toward Gon, a gasp caught in his throat.

Killua doesn’t think he’s ever seen Gon look so serious, determined…

He doesn’t know why, the usual feeling in his stomach that makes him feel sick, annoyed, and agitated. It still feels weird; his chest feels all funny too. But differently. That blade should just make him…

Make him feel such envy…

But he’s just dumbfounded, staring at Gon, watching him slice up the remainder of the Chimera with ease.

“Your highness!”

Gon sheathes his sword, running toward him, worry spilling over in those warm eyes of his as he leans over.

“Are you alright…?”

He pants and Killua looks away, his ears and cheeks burning.

Gon takes his hand so gently that it makes his heart race.

“I-I…”

Gon grabs his shoulder, and Killua can’t help but lean in close.

“I am fine.”

He tries to be polite and use the correct etiquette, but it all seems to fall apart when he looks into Gon’s eyes.

Prickle. Prickle.

Guilt.

“I-I…”

“Are you hurt?”

“I-I’m sorry.”

For everything.

XxX

“Gon, stop! You’re going to die!”

Please!

Killua already lost everyone else! Please don’t!

Don’t die, Gon!

He needs you!

“I’m okay, Ki. I’m gonna save you.”

There’s blood and grime all over Gon’s face, but even now, he’s smiling and stands in front of Killua to protect him.

“GON!”

Killua grabs Gon’s arm in desperation.

Please…

No!

He doesn’t want-

He doesn’t want Gon to die!

It’s aiming for Gon. It’s aiming for Gon!

No! No! No!

“Gon!”

Why, you idiot?! Why, even now, are you so ready to fight? Leave him! He’ll be fine!

It’s- it’s gonna kill Gon…

He steps in front, arm out, praying.

Please- please!

“NO!”

Bright blinding light…

XxX

“It’s called a Silent Princess; it’s an endangered species.”

Killua liked flowers, but he liked this one particularly. With the white and blue petals it was like a light and had a gentleness yet strength to it.

It was free, and-

His fingers brush against the petals, and Gon hums, leaning over his shoulder, staring.

Killua raises an eyebrow.

“Don’t you think it’s pretty?”

“Yeah! It’s pretty like you, your highness!”

The air gets caught right in his lungs, the tips of his ears going bright red as he stutters, coughing.

He didn’t speak formally around Gon anymore, but-but what gave this idiot the right to-!

“Wh-what?! Y-you can’t say that stuff, idiot! It’s-it’s ‘mbarrassing…”

He pouts, playing with a strand of his light hair, tucking it behind his ear.

“Oh, you’re right; I’m sorry, your highness!”

That just makes Killua puff out his cheeks more, crossing his arms over his chest and pointing his chin in the air, using his royal presence.

“Don’t call me that; just call me, Killua.”

“Okay, then I will, Ki!”

“Wha?!”

He looks toward Gon, who is grinning, offering a hand for Killua to take.

Killua grumbles, searching around in the grass for something, grabbing it despite how slimy it is.

“S-stop it, you moron! Eat this! Eat it!”

“W-wait!”

“You look like a dumb frog with your dumb face, so eat it!”

XxX

Why?

He tries! He keeps trying! He’s soaked and cold, the bottom of his dress is sopping wet, and a shiver runs down his spine, but he doesn’t stop trying, stop concentrating.

Nothing is happening!

He feels nothing!

Why? Why?

Is he so useless still…

Why! Why! Won’t this cursed power work for him!

“I can’t…”

Why…?

“What’s wrong with me…?”

Why… why won’t they…

The shame always pours into him, but more so knowing Gon is watching, oddly quiet.

He wraps his arms around himself, letting his tears fall and blend with the water.

“Your highness…”

Gon is calling him that now.

Why?! He just feels so empty…!

He throws his hands down in the water, biting back a scream, choking down a sob.

“Ki. Ki. Ki. Hey, it’s okay.”

He turns around, tears still in his crystalline blue eyes filled with pure pain and sorrow, his lips parted.

Gon’s ever an idiot, his pants now soaked, as he walks closer, placing his hands on Killua’s shoulders. Killua sinks into his touch, grabbing at his tunic and burying his face in his chest.

“I believe in you, Ki. And even if you don’t do it, that’s okay. I promise I’ll protect you.”

“G-Gon…”

He sobs into the chest of the man he’s grown to fall in love with.

XxX

It feels so familiar, running away.

The same fear, the same anxiety.

Killua doesn’t know. He doesn’t understand how it could have gone so wrong all at once. Meruem has awakened, the machines have gone rampant, and still! Still, his powers refuse to awaken.

He feels like he’s being crushed.

Gon’s still so brave, running on like- like

Like there’s hope.

Killua can’t-

He can’t keep up.

His hand slips from Gon’s, and he collapses to the floor, dirt in his hands, muddied up in the perfect fabric of his dress, rain pouring down and hitting his bare shoulders.

“Killua!”

Gon.

“Hey.”

He looks up at Gon, tears building up in his eyes, mixing with the onslaught of rain pouring down his cheeks.

“I-I! Everyone… everyone is dead… I… I…”

Why? Why? Why!?

“I let everyone down… my kingdom… my friends… my father…”

You.

So this is it… the boulder that’s pressing down on his heart is going to cave.

“This cursed power! I’ve tried! And-and… now…”

He can’t help the quaking of his frame, the trembling of his fingers, as mud gets beneath his nails.

He feels like he’s going to die.

It hurts too much.

It hurts.

It’s tearing him apart. His throat feels like it’s closing in, and he just sobs, his head aching and pounding.

“So I really am just a failure!”

Everyone is dead… because- because of him…

He collapses in Gon’s arms, every ounce of pain leaving his lips as he screams and cries.

“G-Gon, please, I- can’t do it… I can’t. It hurts.”

He feels so safe and warm in Gon’s arms, even with the rain that’s soaked him to the bone, as Gon wraps his arms around him tightly, holding him close.

For a moment, Killua feels alright.

Gon presses the top of his lips to the crown of Killua’s head.

“It’s okay, Ki. I promise. I’ll make everything right.”

XxX

“Are you sure?”

He can’t help but be anxious as Gon offers him a hand to ride atop his horse. It’s true, Killua did want to learn to ride his own horse, but now he’s starting to have second thoughts, his stomach churning.

“You’ll be okay, highness; I’m here.”

Gon always called him that when he was trying to reassure him, but Killua didn’t like it. He doesn’t like being reminded.

He takes Gon’s hand hesitantly, and Gon pulls him up gingerly, and Killua bites back a scream that slips out partially.

This doesn’t seem very stable…

He wraps his arms around Gon’s neck, sitting on his lap and screwing his eyes shut.

Gon laughs and Killua feels his face flush.

“You’re really cute, your highness.”

“S-stop making fun of me!”

“I would never, Ki!”

XxX

“Please, no! Gon! Please!”

“I’m okay, Ki.”

Don’t die, he shakes the man harder as Gon coughs and uses his last strength to smile.

No! No!

Why! Why! Why when he finally has it!

They’re going to take away the last person left he has!

“No… please…”

“Don’t go!”

He can’t! Lose Gon!

He rests his head on Gon’s chest, begging over and over.

A light sound.

He lifts his head slowly, gasping.

The sword. The sword he once resented…

Was…

“H-he can be saved…?”

Gon… Gon can be saved…?

XxX

Then it’s his job. His duty. He keeps his head held high even when his legs tremble, even though he feels so weak.

He’s going to do it.

He’s going to seal Meruem and save his kingdom.

So… when you wake up Gon… can you come save him…? Can you come hold him and smile at him once more?

If you do that, he can… Killua can wait decades.

Because a legend is about to begin.

#hxh #Hunter X Hunter #killua #gonkillu #gonkillu supremacy #gon #Gon hxh #Gon Freecss #windy’s stuff #Does this look familiar? Yes and no! Look this is one of my fave works 🥺🙏 so I’m posting it full instead of reblogging the link ahaha eh #get it?#if the twelve reblogs from myself didn’t give that off lol I HAVE NO SHAME ok I I like it🙏🥺#KI IS SO PRETTY 😤😤😤😤🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🤧#GON SAVING KI GON SAVING KI CHANTS #SLAMS HANDS DOWN ON TABLE GK GK GK GKKKK AND ZELDA MY TWO FAVE THINGS #AHHHHHHH I LOVE THEM! I LOVE KI! I LOVE GON TREATING KI LIKE A PRINCESS AND JUST AHHH SO DELICATELY TAKING HIS HAND #AND COMFORTING HIM AND SAVING HIM 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺😭😭😭🤧🤧🤧 KI DESERVES THE WORLD 🥺🥺🥺🥺😭😭😭😤🤧#AHHHHH AND JUST AHHHHHH THEM GK MY FAVE AND WITH ZELDA ONE OF MY FAVES IM SO HAPPY #BLESS MYSELF FOR MAKING THIS #My heart goes ahhhh doki doki so much when Ki falls in love with Gon 🥺🥺🥺 it’s like doki when it’s Zelda and Link but I love GK so much it #is like doki doki doki doki and I ahhh! Love it so much must use this trope in future! 🥺😤🙏#THERYE SO CUTE #KI IS SO CUTE MY HEARTTTTTTT I think I’ve done the trope of my Ki playing with his hair and sticking it behind his ear when Gon compliments #him imagine it! 😤😤😤 AHHHHH SO CUT #E I WANTED TO SQEEE AT THE CUTE GK STUFF #AND CRY FOR KI 🥺#I’m #U THOUGHT U ESCAPED IT BUT NO I LOVE IT OK maybe I’m biased cuz I wrote this after a painful writers block but also my first based on smth #au so!

3 notes · View notes